Re: I don't like the post title I had. Suggestions? Winston

1

I see Maximus on the list for boys. So, in a dozen years, junior high kids will have another option for penis jokes.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:23 AM
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Oh, this is a cool idea.

Without reading the article:

Off the top of my head:

Old-timey-sounding girls' names that may well be on the list

Annabel
Amelia
Aurelia
Millicent
Rosalie (A TWILIGHT CHARACTER)
Esme (ALSO A TWILIGHT CHARACTER)
Beatrix


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:25 AM
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2: Ned is rooting for Edward and Bella.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:28 AM
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2: Not bad at all! And depressingly, I love those names and am not such a rogue maverick as I'd like to believe.

At least in the Old Folks Home, I'll be taken care of by people with adorable names.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:29 AM
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I'm waiting for "C. Alice" as a girls name given to somebody whose conception required a chemical boost.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:32 AM
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One of these days "Athelstan" and "Ethelred" are going to make big comebacks, along with "Bathsheba."


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:35 AM
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6: I give "Egbert", "Oswald", and "Berengaria" a better chance.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:37 AM
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Hmm. My daughter's middle name is Harper.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:41 AM
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Although our front-runner for boy names is derivative of one of them

Rivers? Weezer nerd.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:43 AM
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That's Maximus Weezernerd to you, buddy.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:45 AM
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6: One of these days "Athelstan" and "Ethelred" are going to make big comebacks

Amen. I tried to get an Athelstan boomlet going, but B just looked at me (!not literally) and when I explained it she just told me she wasn't a medievalist.

Damn specialists.

max
['And you left out Oswy and Oswulf and...']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:50 AM
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Based on their methodology, I'd make a dark horse bet on Cecilia (or possible Cecille) to place or show. It's got the L sound, the vowel ending, the soupcon of old-fashionedness, and a respectable European pedigree. Substantially lower odds on it being pronounced in the Italian fashion, with both C's rendered as "ch".

For slightly different reasons, I wouldn't be surprised by a "Cecil" boomlet among boys.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:52 AM
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Had XC been a girl his name would've been Lila. We thought we were terribly clever. Apparently not so much.


Posted by: tonks | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:52 AM
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"Winston" must be due for a revival. AFAICT all living Winstons are middle-aged Chinese men in Hawaii.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:56 AM
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I can see that I'll have to make some other changes, along with the surgery and new wardrobe, to keep that illusion of youth.


Posted by: Commenter formrly known as Michael | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 8:59 AM
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14: I know a pre-school aged Winston who is neither Chinese or in Hawaii. But maybe Winston is his middle name.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:00 AM
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Renegade lawman Winston Justice: not Chinese.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:01 AM
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A boom in Cecilias and Celias would please me.

I can't remember what romanish name I tried to get my sister to use, but it was a good one.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:01 AM
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Based on their methodology, I'd make a dark horse bet on Cecilia

You're breaking my heart / You're shaking my confidence [intervals] daily.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:01 AM
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Biggus Dickus?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:02 AM
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14: OMG, every Winston I know is Chinese, too. Why are Winstons Chinese? (Mine are 2 30-somethings in NY.)


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:03 AM
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Other girls' names I give a decent shot of becoming fashionable: Constanza, Anya, Amani (Swahili for "peace"). I would also include Aurelie on that list if it weren't so obviously destined to expose a teenage girl to ridicule.

Some dark horse bets for boys names: Holden, Hendrick, Otto, Sven.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:03 AM
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all living Winstons are middle-aged Chinese men

All Eugenes are Asian-Am, probably Chinese-Am.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:03 AM
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23: Also "Edmund".


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:04 AM
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Most people I've known with the last name Zhang have been Chinese also.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:05 AM
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Winston the Ghostbuster.

Winston the bellicose inebriate.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:05 AM
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27

Oh, one more: Winston the cigarette.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:06 AM
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Winston tastes good, like a cigarette should. Laydeez.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:06 AM
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29

I think I hear you all loud and clear.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:11 AM
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re: 23

The only Eugene I know is very much not Chinese.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:12 AM
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31

30: How can you be sure?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:14 AM
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The Winston in Broken Flowers isn't Chinese.

Basically, I would pull for any offbeat character name featured in a Wes Anderson movie. Thus: Margot, Chas, Etheline, Raleigh, Kingsley, Eleanor, Herman, Magnus, Dirk, Dignan, Future Man.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:14 AM
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re: 31

It'd have to be a pretty elaborate deception.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:15 AM
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34

...which would be so typically Chinese of Eugene.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:18 AM
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32: I was always suprised that Eleanor didn't get a bigger Lord of the Rings boost as it (and her parents) are pretty much the only "standard" names in that book.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:18 AM
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33 - They are hardworking, you know.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:18 AM
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37

35: Lord of the Rings?


Posted by: the Other Paul | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:21 AM
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38

Future Man's chances are somewhat damaged by the fact that there's a real-life Future Man and he plays with Béla Fleck.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:21 AM
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37: It's the name Sam gives to his daughter at the very end. Maybe the left it out of the movie.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:22 AM
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37: It's a famous sci-fi trilogy that came out a few years ago, based on a famous series of books by J.R.R. Tolkien.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:24 AM
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40: The movies, along with the Harry Potter films, were produced as part of an effort to boost the employment of elderly British actors in action movies.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:28 AM
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And so that Sean Astin would be referred to as "Sam" instead of "Rudy".


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:29 AM
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38: Future Man was played by the elusive *other* Wilson brother.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:29 AM
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It will be weird if Hermione begins to make the scene since, while charming, bookish, and adorable in HP, she is one of the nastiest pieces of work there is in Greek tragedy. Well, ok, that is a lot of competition, but she is pretty bad.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:31 AM
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I still think there's a chance that Marpessa becomes a trendy name. She was the only mortal to ever reject the advances of a god and survive!!


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:36 AM
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46

39: Thanks. I've read the books, but I forgot about that bit.

40: So that's what it is!


Posted by: the Other Paul | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:37 AM
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47

So if "Maximus" is on the list, can "Optimus" be far behind?


Posted by: Tom Scudder | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:46 AM
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38: I am well aware of that, oudemia. But the guy who plays with Mr Fleck is not related to the Wilsons.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:46 AM
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47: I tried to get a friend to name his upcoming child Septimus/a but no luck.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:52 AM
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50

Would that child have been the seventh or born in the seventh month?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:54 AM
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51

Because Teo is here today: This.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:57 AM
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Oops. "Because Teo isn't here". And because I'm apparently an ass.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 9:58 AM
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50: I told him to tell his relations that he was counting backwards.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:06 AM
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54

Sam Gamgee's daughter is actually named Elanor, so it's not quite a normal name.


Posted by: Amber | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:10 AM
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You know what's a normal name? Sam.

The comic in 51 is characteristically shitty.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:12 AM
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56

At least Septimus Prime would make sense.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:12 AM
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57

But not SamWISE.


Posted by: Amber | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:13 AM
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The comic in 51 is characteristically shitty.

Shitty, but topical. Isn't that the tradition?

(Also, Sam's full name is "Samwise.")


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:14 AM
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59

This makes me want more babies so that I can name them. I probably should get some pets.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:22 AM
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60

This makes me want more babies

Drop me an email.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:26 AM
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61

Scout?!?

Please, parents, don't.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:26 AM
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62

I went to college with a guy named Rancher.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:27 AM
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63

Was he jolly?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:27 AM
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64

I went to college with a guy named Scott.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:27 AM
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65

Was he great?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:29 AM
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66

I knew a couple who named their baby Samwise. He's probably 8 or 9 now.


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:29 AM
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67

I knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:29 AM
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Was he jolly?

Not that I recall.

I went to college with a guy named Scott.

With my oldest kid (born '97), I gave him Scott as a normal middle name, in case he didn't like the name Keegan when he got older. Last year, Scott was #322 for boys' names. Keegan was #222.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:33 AM
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66: I have friends with a daughter named Arwen.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:34 AM
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70

You know what would be a nice girl's name? "Cola".


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:36 AM
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69: In the 70s we had a dog named Elrond.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:37 AM
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What sucks is having a great name for your pet and then it becomes a popular person name. Especially if you're socially awkward and have to continually choke back, "Hey, my cat's name is Lily/dog's name is Isabel/whatever."

I've never met a Toby that I didn't like, person or animal. Good names are good names, perhaps.


Posted by: Amber | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:38 AM
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73

Elrond Hubbard?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:38 AM
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74

You know what would be a nice girl's name? "Cola" "Sarsaparilla".


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:39 AM
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75

I had a dog named "Jolly". And I went to college with a guy who was a rancher, though he had a different name.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:42 AM
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76

I have a friend who probably would have named his daughter Padme or Leia, except that he married somebody who wasn't stupid.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:43 AM
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77

Her poor brother Jar-Jar.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:46 AM
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Ah... the name is Bootsy, baby. And all of my children should thank their mothers and my occasional bouts of sobriety that it isn't theirs.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:50 AM
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All girls' names should be modifiable to include a conventional feminine ending, if only for the sake of their future foreign language instruction. Amber, for example, sucks. So do Harper and Scout, which are literary but also sound like occupations you can select in a fantasy RPG.


Posted by: Amber | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:51 AM
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It's not so bad, Amberella.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:55 AM
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81

Drop me an email.

It's been awhile, but I'm pretty sure that's not how it works.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:55 AM
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81: FedEx and dry ice might work.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:58 AM
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I think your internet provider is ripping you off, Di.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 10:58 AM
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66: What was his other leg's name?

I was nicknamed Happy for a brief period.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:08 AM
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85

uh, 67


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:09 AM
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that is, there was another chap, and the other chap said, "what's his other leg's name?"


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:12 AM
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87

ok, I'm done here.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:12 AM
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85: The category is "Years in Bryan Adams Songs, minus 2".


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:12 AM
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it took me a while to realize 51 wasn't about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNoS2BU6bbQ&feature=PlayList&p=186C1151D9444473&index=0 skit

i like wolfgang.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:17 AM
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76: "Padma" and "Lia" are perfectly nice names.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:18 AM
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I've never met a Toby that I didn't like, person or animal. Good names are good names, perhaps.

You don't know the half of it, sister.


Posted by: OPINIONATED WALTER SHANDY | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:21 AM
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I've never met a Toby that I didn't like, person or animal. Good names are good names, perhaps.

I have. A right bastard to work for.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:23 AM
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The only Star Wars name worth having is Lando.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:25 AM
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94

Or I guess Boba.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:25 AM
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90: Yes. I'm still mad about what Star War I-III did to my childhood memories.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:26 AM
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91: Yay.

The OP link's comments are really intense. I like all the comments from people desperate to come up with the most normal names possible so that no one ever misspells or mispronounces their child's name, and that they recall every instance of being asked to spell the name with horror.

For other Tristram Shandy relevance, the chapter on names is great.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:27 AM
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Blackwell, who is also known as Julian -- in order to sound like a bastard rather than a friendly fellow


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:28 AM
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I'm a little bothered by the fact that my cat's name is one of the runner ups, but I didn't name her so I guess I don't have to feel too terribly trendy. That said, if you're in the market for girl names, Ellie is a good choice. So many nicknames! (Of course, one of the most obvious - Smelly Ellie - is perhaps not what you want for a young girl. But it's appropriate, for both cats and small children.)


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:28 AM
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I wonder if Elspeth Smellie was nicknamed "Smelly Ellie".


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:29 AM
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Especially if you're socially awkward and have to continually choke back, "Hey, my cat's name is Lily/dog's name is Isabel/whatever."

I love it when I find out I do something that isn't socially acceptable and had absolutely no clue. Seriously, we can't mention that our beloved animals share a name with someone?


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:30 AM
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I'm still mad about what Star War I-III did to my childhood memories.

You and Patton Oswalt.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:35 AM
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102

When I was a child, I thought children with mockable names had been set up by their parents for failure. But I soon came to realize that there are no mockable names, just mockable children.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:36 AM
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102: Mr. Haywood Jablome begs to differ.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:38 AM
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104

Haywood might get the occasional "yes" answer.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:44 AM
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101: Yes, but I did it more briefly and with a spelling error.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:45 AM
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106

Note to self: do not hook up with Katie.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:47 AM
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104: But he'll never get on a call-in radio show or be able to get pizza delivered.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:48 AM
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106: Or issue a life insurance policy to her brother.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:50 AM
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106 is why sibling solidarity is so absolutely crucial.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:55 AM
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106: oh man. That's pretty much fabulous.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:57 AM
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12, 19: We've noticed an uptick since we named our younger daughter Cecelia (and thus became sensitized). And the damn song will be 45 years old by the time kids are to the teasing stage. It's like my dad trying to tease a childhood friend of mine by singing "Rocking Robin" to her.

And Audrey is definitely climbing the ranks quickly.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:58 AM
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I like how considered and measured Katie was with her favors. She makes lists in advance.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 11:59 AM
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100: It's not socially acceptable to the people with pet names. It's especially annoying to people with very common dog names, like "Toby." Bystanders don't seem to care.


Posted by: Amber | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:00 PM
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The only Toby I know.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:07 PM
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115

106: What are the odds Brian got a haircut?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:09 PM
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113: For several years there every male baby and every male puppy was named Max.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:16 PM
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106: Holy shit.


Posted by: Tom Scudder | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:19 PM
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in order to sound like a bastard rather than a friendly fellow

Nah, he was named Julian and then adopted Toby as a typically cunning, evil plot to make people think he might be OK.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:29 PM
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106: That is just about the worst sibling rivalry burn I've ever heard of. Outside of Greek tragedy. Inside of a Greek tragedy, it's too loud to hear much.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:30 PM
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You know what an awesome name is? Vsevolod. "Ruler of all" or "conqueror of all". And you've got Meyerhold and Pudovkin to legitimize it for the artsy types.

Lyudmilla (as in Pavlichenko) would be a good name for Vsevolod's sister.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:33 PM
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118: Many years ago I caused the hippie owner of an Evanston, IL bookstore to explode with rage by asking for some Blackwell title or other. After simmering down a bit, he explained that he only cared about "that awful, terrible, lying" company because the books they published were good.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:34 PM
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But he'll never get on a call-in radio show or be able to get pizza delivered.

But he can still get quoted in the Charleston (South Carolina) Post and Courier


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:34 PM
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121. He knew his onions, and his publishers. I was working in the bookselling arm, and they hated me because I was involved in trying to organise the place.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:39 PM
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Also, more people should name their sons "Svyatoslav".
Also, what is it with baby name sites and annoying pop-up ads?


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:40 PM
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This article reports on a few unfortunate or merely humorous real life juxtapositions of first and last names (e.g. a dentist named "Les Plack"). But the best part is the commenters it drew out of the woodwork to complain about their parents' cruelty or lack of due diligence.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:40 PM
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123: they hated me because I was involved in trying to organise the place

He was opposed to the Dewey Decimal System?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:41 PM
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127

What is a v-card?


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:43 PM
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128

127: I don't think it concerns you, Bave.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:47 PM
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Bave, you innocent. If Katie gives up her v-card, it has to be for someone special.

I'm dying to link to a video made at my former employer, a college where a bunch of 20-year-old girls made a video about saving your virginity. They don't give any particular reasons, other than that some guys are not actually very interesting, and when the girl says no, she gets a sparkly wig.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:48 PM
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130

V Card


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:48 PM
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131

Russian vodka! Now with extra blood libel!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:48 PM
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132

Oh, it's like a dance card with just one, um, slot?

Why does Katie have two guys on her v-card list?


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:49 PM
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133

132.2: Options. You need options.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:50 PM
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134

First come, first serve, I guess. She gave herself until April 2010 to accomplish her goals.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:50 PM
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Also, more people should name their sons "Svyatoslav".

I knew somebody (Irish) who called their car "Svatopluk", if that's any help. I don't understand how it's possible to get worked up about weird names once Bob Geldof and Paula Yates had done their worst. Heavy Hyundai Trigger Happy, indeed.

126. No, he was all for Dewy. He just hated AACR with an unreasonable loathing.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:50 PM
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135.2: Well, you do need to watch the American Association for Cancer Research. I think they mean research to cure cancer, but the name doesn't make that clear.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:54 PM
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137

It's like my dad trying to tease a childhood friend of mine by singing "Rocking Robin" to her.

Hey, that managed to drive me crazy in the first grade, and I think I'm younger than Chopper. Maybe I was just extra sensitive.


Posted by: () | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:55 PM
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It's not socially acceptable to the people with pet names. It's especially annoying to people with very common dog names, like "Toby."

Makes sense. My pets never had very "pet" names, so I'm thinking I haven't managed to inadvertently insult anyone over the years. I did have a co-worker named Toby and a turtle named Toby, but both Toby's got along marvelously.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:57 PM
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I have a couple of Ladislavs among my in-laws. Calling one of our kids a name like Svatoslav wouldn't raise an eyebrow.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 12:58 PM
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140

The highlight for me of 106 is the "Waddya gonna do?" taunt from the brother at the bottom of the page.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:00 PM
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141

I've outgrown my desire to name cats Finn MacCool, Hermes Trismegistus, or Palinurus.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:00 PM
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142

I've outgrown my desire to have a pug named Boswell whom I would introduce as my biographer, but only because I can't imagine owning a pug.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:02 PM
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Yep, I loved that taunt too. I don't think she's going to get much leverage from the parents. If I were her, though, I'd be thinking pretty hard about ways to make him pay.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:06 PM
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144

142: You could practice by imagining you own a goldfish and slowly build-up to small mammals and then dogs.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:07 PM
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145

106 makes me want to re-read Les Liaisons dangereuses.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:08 PM
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I shared a house with a pug. Great little guy, but man is that one poorly designed dog. I think he's at least half blind now from running into the world eyeball first.


Posted by: Mo MacArbie | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:08 PM
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144: Ha! It's a dog-type thing. I was raised to love big dogs with long noses. Pugs are sweet, but kind of gross.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:09 PM
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148

Yeah, you don't want to give out your vCard to just anybody. Identity theft concerns, you know.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:11 PM
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149

It's a great book, completely epistolary.

Chinese dog breeding

Svejk begins the book as a forger of dog pedigrees.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:12 PM
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150

143: My imagination fails. Pig's blood at prom? Still not as bad.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:14 PM
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151

||

How I know I've really let things get away from me: if a genie appeared in my office and offered me three wishes, I would seriously consider using up one of them on getting all of my filing done.

|>


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:21 PM
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All these years of being convinced by myself and others that girls don't really draw up lists like that...illusions shattered! Some people are horrible.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:22 PM
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150: If I knew where to place the wager, I'd consider putting money on something really ugly transpiring at Chris's wedding -- possibly during the toast from his sister.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:24 PM
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153: How about seriously undercooked pork, a broken toilet and a web cam?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:26 PM
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possibly during the toast from his sister

Reporting for duty.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:26 PM
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girls don't really draw up lists like that

I not-quite-accidentally discovered such a list once, though it was skewed toward already accomplished rather than the prospective sex acts. The most revelatory aspect of the list was two names entered on the same line, with the annotation "3-some! Delightful!"


Posted by: Depicted on a banknote | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:28 PM
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153. Somebody shouting "Yes!" at when the officiant asks if anybody knows any reason not to marry the couple would do. But I suppose some American denominations are so slipshod they don't even ask it.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:28 PM
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I find the realization that such lists exist delightful.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:29 PM
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159

crap - good luck LB. The good thing about filings is that, um, notices of errata are easy to do. And then you can drink!


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:29 PM
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151, 159: Filing with the court, or just getting the mountains of paper into appropriate folders for storage and easy retrieval at a later date?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:32 PM
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Who has three thumbs and is headed out the door until 2010? This guy.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:32 PM
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Wait, how common are these lists? Presidential masks as needed.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:32 PM
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I find the realization that such lists exist delightful.

It's like a challenge. If I were to create such a list, what would I put on it?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:33 PM
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My mother always encouraged me to make lists. Write down all the things about each boy that you like and dislike, etc. I thought that was stupid.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:34 PM
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162: I've never seen or heard of one before. Discussions about such things? Yes.

163: Just start ranking Unfogged commenters.


Posted by: Dolly Madison | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:35 PM
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I cannot imagine a world in which I composed such a list. I could never be so organized.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:36 PM
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164: But you've got your infamous limerick collection.


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:37 PM
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I cannot imagine a world in which I composed such a list.

Not enough paper.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:40 PM
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159, 160: The latter -- the problem is getting my office in order, not missing deadlines. (Although the filing problem is bad enough that there could, not implausibly, be forgotten deadlines lurking under piles of paper, ready to snap at me when revealed.)

Part of the problem is that the state took away our wastepaper baskets a month or two ago, under the theory that we'd generate less waste if we didn't have any place to put it. (You think I'm kidding, probably. But no.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:44 PM
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The limericks are about people I've slept with, not about those I intend to sleep with. Also, I haven't updated them since like 2007.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:45 PM
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The limericks are about people I've slept with, not about those I intend to sleep with. Also, I haven't updated them since like 2007.

Not since the time with that guy from Nantucket, eh?


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:48 PM
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Not enough paper.

But plenty of pixels, and 800 comments left to go before this thread breaks the blog.

I did note down my lovers one time when I realized I couldn't remember how many there had been.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:48 PM
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Then I'm afraid I'm going to have to take back my sympathies.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:48 PM
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173 is to everyone.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:49 PM
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They're pretty good. I should add to it. I thing maybe one makes lists because one hates to forget.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:49 PM
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But I have never made an intentions list of people to sleep with (and to what degree). Perhaps I'd have more success if I did more focused visualizing.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:49 PM
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Also, I haven't updated them since like 2007.

Then what was all this about?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:49 PM
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178

I sent that thread to the girl. She was entertained.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:50 PM
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I thing maybe one makes lists because one hates to forget.

Magazines publish "listicles" because readers' attention is so fleeting, so you may be right.

Didn't Tracey Emin do a "people I've slept with" project that involved names on a tent?


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:52 PM
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180

179.2: Yep.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:56 PM
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181

Okay, reading a brief that just cited to a case with "Haywood" in the caption. I swear, I feel compelled to find a Jablome case just so I can cite both and snicker like a child.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:57 PM
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180: She's a delicate flower.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 1:58 PM
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||
Is anyone else watching CSPAN 2? There was some kind of mic live during the cloture vote (still ongoing) that captured, "Yeah. Yeah. I miss you too. You'll have to come to Kansas. Yeah, you can be the cantor. The Chanukkah cantor."
|>


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:01 PM
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I have long been interested in the idea of a marginal lover, someone either
a) almost Xd (obvs not interesting for the delusional, which includes my younger self)
or
b) Xd indifferently.

88 lines for 44 women, I guess.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:02 PM
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Is anyone else watching CSPAN 2?

The question insults even as it wounds.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:03 PM
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184.last: My real name is in that song, but not in any especially great way. Boo.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:03 PM
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183: The Senate roll calls are so much more entertaining than the House's.


Posted by: Fake Accent | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:03 PM
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The Senate roll calls are so much more entertaining than the House's.

Do the Senators shout smart arsed ripostes when their names are called or do they just wear silly hats during roll calls?


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:06 PM
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Yeah, but thing I don't like about the Senate votes is that there's no live counter that says how many have voted Aye and Nay. It would be much more gripping if you could watch for a counter to get to sixty. They could then have the text flash or something.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:08 PM
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Harkin's up talking about senators' travel plans. Vitter says no, we can't move up the votes to 6 pm. What about midnight then? Nah, can't do that either.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:14 PM
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A few years ago, one of my tasks was to listen very closely to Senate roll calls and note the names of the people voting either for or against. It was impossible to get them all when they read the names in quick succession, but for various reasons we didn't want to wait until the whole list was put online an hour or so later, so we focused on just not being wrong about the names we did hear.


Posted by: Fake Accent | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:15 PM
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Coburn's now talking about his 41st wedding anniversary. 3 minutes, point of personal privilege. Congress rules.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:27 PM
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"She has completed every part of my life."


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:28 PM
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"She has completed every part of my life."

You what? To my understanding this means that she has comprehensively killed him. Is he a zombie?


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:31 PM
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The Constitution does not impose any tests that would exclude the undead.


Posted by: Fake Accent | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:32 PM
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Coburn's now talking about his 41st wedding anniversary.

Democracy doesn't work.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:34 PM
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||
Aieee! No more masturbating to the . . . life-partnership of Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins. If those two kids couldn't make it . . .
|>


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:38 PM
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Shorter John Thune: If this bill were structured differently, it wouldn't reduce the deficit.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:42 PM
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197: I feel pathetic for finding this news quite sad.


Posted by: ari | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:43 PM
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197: I thought a "life-partnership" could be dissolved only by the death of one partner or the other. In single* combat.

* I'm sorry. It's Christmas. Puns are my family's way of camouflaging bad memories.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:49 PM
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No more masturbating to the . . . life-partnership of Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins.

Never mind. You can watch a video of a woman inducing a duck to masturbate in a twisty glass jar instead. Take your mind off it, like.

Ah, well. Io Sol Invictus, everybody! I'm off to bed and then I've got to be fucking jolly for a week.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 2:54 PM
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197: Oh, I'm sad. Which is silly, getting personally involved in celebrities' marriages is ridiculous. But nonetheless.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 3:07 PM
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You Winston, you Loseston.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 3:11 PM
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Euuuugh. I was happier five minutes ago when ballistic duck erections were an entirely theoretical matter.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 3:14 PM
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Schrödinger's duck erection doesn't reflect reality, Standpipe. Those erections were going on whether we knew about them or not.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 3:16 PM
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199, 202: I am totally sad and Bull Durham will never be the same again. Sigh.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 3:56 PM
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Best name ever: Hugga Bubba.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 4:11 PM
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Jen Garner was somewhat disappointed about not being able to ever name her kids something unusual, because no matter what she tried it would become popular.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-23-09 6:25 PM
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178: Did she like the sonnet the best?!?


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 12-24-09 10:37 AM
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Those names all seem rather 'now' to me, I have to say. But then I have one which is on the list, 2 that are also mentioned, and another whose blogname is on the list (both flowers). I don't think we went so far along the M'cKynnzziy route as the US, so the old person name backlash came quicker.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 12-24-09 3:12 PM
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grr, my daughter's name is on there. and I was so careful to check the social security list of name popularity first; it was very low and not apparently trending up. and we were totally going with milo maximillian if it were a boy. le sigh. I really do wonder what the mechanism by which these preferences become widely shared is.


Posted by: alameida | Link to this comment | 12-25-09 9:02 AM
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Maximilian! That was one of the names I suggested! I still think it would go well with his other names.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-25-09 9:18 AM
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