Re: The garden sociopath

1

what it sows.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:09 AM
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in this petty pace from day to day, to the last syllable of recorded time.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:12 AM
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And all our dash displays have lighted fools the way to rusty death.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:15 AM
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Out, out, brief brake light! Life's but a driven shadow, a poor passenger who sits and belts himself against the seat, and then can move no more. It is a system run by an idiot, full of online content, navigating nowhere.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:22 AM
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...Ban "Fatties" From Dating Site


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 2:34 AM
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... me out.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 2:36 AM
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Up your inner thigh.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 3:52 AM
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...up your leg and starts biting the inside of your ass.

Oh, rainBOWs. I like those.


Posted by: Eric Cartman | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 4:40 AM
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Bsod coming to a dashboard near you!


Posted by: Turgid jacobian | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 4:43 AM
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on little CATVs feet.


Posted by: Biohazard | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 5:02 AM
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||

The dude my sister briefly got involved with (and has since extricated herself from) turned out to be a sociopath. Google reveals that he was arrested for attacking a guy who cut him off at the supermarket with his keys, bloodying the guy on the back of his head and face.

|>


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 5:11 AM
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Poor German auto manufacturers. They haven't grasped the threat of the American tort bar. They think a few paltry click through disclaimers will shield them from liability when a teenager reading reviews on Pitchfork plows into a Kindergarten. They have "deep pockets" written all over them.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 5:15 AM
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I doubt these would be allowed in the UK. Even when you're at a standstill, it's still illegal for the driver to use a mobile phone and careless driving has been made a serious offence. So far SatNavs and their users have managed to get away with it, but I suspect these would be a step too far.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 5:35 AM
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The freedom to make what seem to us patently avoidable mistakes is still a freedom (see also "shall issue" concealed-carry laws, crappy Texas public school textbooks, etc., et nauseam cetera).


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 5:57 AM
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I could see it going either way in the States. On the one hand, GPS units seem to be in something like every other car I see. On the other hand, full-motion video in view of the driver is illegal in all 50 states, and the number of states with hands-free cell phone laws is increasing. I could envision a compromise where you end up with internet usage legal only in the backseat or something, which is already possible*.

*speaking of which, I heard of a trend whereby private cars try to stay with tour buses that have wi-fi as they move down the highway, such that the car's passengers can surf the web on their laptops. Did I hear about that trend here? Did it have a name?


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:34 AM
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Did it have a name?

Tailgating?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:37 AM
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I got all excited when my commuter rail line installed WiFi in the trains, because there is a long stretch of my commute where my 3G wireless card doesn't get a signal.

Then I figured out that the onboard WiFi router actually uses the same damn signal as my 3G card. Result: not only has my connectivity not improved, I'm now competing with every bozo with a WiFi card for the same 3G bandwidth.

I think I know how it feels now to be a Republican with good health insurance.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:40 AM
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I am at the airport, already tipsy, at the gate and a stranger's child just told me he needs to "go poopies". I would welcome the presence of Internet creeps right now.

|>

On topic: "...up with wear."


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:46 AM
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... are altogether ookey..


Posted by: cleek | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:47 AM
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18: My son is big on inappropriate conversations with strangers. I kind of enjoy it as it is the only form of surrealism left to me.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:51 AM
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I have to go poopies. Fortunately, there is a car dashboard nearby.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:52 AM
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I've enjoyed driving with laptop connected for about 18 months now. Oh sure, it's better when my son is along, and can read aloud (surf Expedia, etc).


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:53 AM
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21: You're starting a band called Dashboard Regressional?


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:54 AM
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You're not very good at toilet humor, Stanley.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:58 AM
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Stanley, you can still be good at other things. Don't let him get to you.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:01 AM
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I just hope that only a few people get killed thanks to this idiocy before the automakers are sued into bankruptcy. Unfortunately I suspect that it will require several hundred deaths and maimings before the combination of driver's delusions about their competence and automaker's desire to compete on features regardless of who suffers is overcome by the public's desire to avoid pointless death.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:11 AM
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Poopies!


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:11 AM
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22: yes, but you live in Montana, where there are no speed limits, no other cars, the cars drive themselves, and the highways are bracketed by enormous foam bumpers as in kiddie bowling.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:23 AM
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28 -- Now I do. First trip with the thing: DC to Cleveland (a surprisingly short and eminently worthwhile jaunt) with unbroken internet connectivity -- including during the side trip to Albert Gallatin's country estate.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:34 AM
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...moving up slowly. Internet creeps, moving up slowly.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 9:17 AM
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Yay, Cryptic ned.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 9:27 AM
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On the one hand, GPS units seem to be in something like every other car I see.

I haven't seen any stats on how GPS units affect driving. It could be a wash. I nearly rear-ended someone when I first got mine and got engrossed in the display. On the other hand, I don't have to look for street signs, addresses, and landmarks nearly as much. That's really nice at night when the usual idiot drivers are reinforced by parking varlets dressed in black and the other flakes darting out into the streets.


Posted by: Biohazard | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 9:30 AM
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reinforced by parking varlets dressed in black

Somebody needs to tell the CMU kids not to jaywalk after dark wearing black. Or at least to look both ways. Maybe JRoth could design them some steps over Forbes.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 9:32 AM
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||
Must read on intelligence failures.
|>


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 9:34 AM
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...keep calling me.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 9:46 AM
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...keep swearing in their FB profiles.

On a somewhat related note, could any of y'all who are FB friends do me a favor and see the request in the Note I just threw up on my profile? My SIL is pissing me off and I'd like to crush her as thoroughly as possible.

(And if we're not FB friends and you would like to be, drop me a line at the linked e-mail above.)


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 9:51 AM
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I am now in Hartford, Gateway to Adventure, no thanks to my cab driver. He spent the whole drive from the airport telling me about the twenty years he's spent living here, then took me to the wrong hotel, then told me we were on the right street when we clearly were not, then tried to argue with me about where my hotel is. At one point, for added relevance and irony, the GPS unit suction-cupped to his windshield fell off. He was in no way distracted by its consultations, as he did not make any use of it.

I love traveling, really.

In genuinely happy news, there were four babies on the plane and only two of us detectably wailed during turbulence.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:02 AM
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We have to become your FB friends in order to know why you'd like to crush your sister-in-law, Chopper?

Despite risks, internet creeps inward.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:24 AM
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... keeps it on the down low.


Posted by: Billy Jangles | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:47 AM
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Oh, sorry, Parsi. Not that interesting really. She friended me, which I didn't love, but accepted in the interest of family harmony. Now she's waging some kind of passive-aggressive whisper campaign within my wife's family about how crude my Facebook posts are and how said posts are going to kill my ability to get a job (I've been unemployed for 15 months now) because "they" are going to read them using the scary Intertubes and eliminate me as a candidate.

Which, you know, would be a concern if I ever posted anything on the searchable Internet under my real name and didn't practice rigid privacy control on social-networking sites and their earlier equivalents where I might post something offensive to HR. And have been doing so for 18 god-damned years.

In short, I'm irked that she won't give me credit for knowing what I'm doing and the bullshit way she's trying to manipulate my wife. Plus the extra baggage carried around by the socially awkward teenager living inside me, who is paranoid that everyone dislikes me and is making fun of me behind my back.

So yeah. Crushing needs to occur.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:48 AM
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I killed a bunch of hobos back in the '90s, but then it stopped being a turn-on.


Posted by: The Real Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:51 AM
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She's your wife's sister?

Your brother's wife?

Your sister's wife?


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:51 AM
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My mother's Prius has a built-in touchscreen GPS, phone working, etc. thingy, but the NannyStatists at Toyota have made it so that you have to be at a complete stop to do anything with it (except for pushing a button for preprogrammed phone numbers).


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:52 AM
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43: I thought all Priuses (Prii?) had a button you could push and a recorded voice would say "You're better than them, not just wealthier."


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:54 AM
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||

Scientific Study Shows!:

Children born in California with two college-educated parents are 4 times as likely to be diagnosed with autism.

Just saying.

Heard it on NPR yesterday.

|>


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 10:55 AM
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I am now in Hartford, Gateway to Adventure....

The birthplace of many Colt firearms and one Flippanter.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:14 AM
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40: Oh. And I don't dislike you, nor am I making fun of you behind your back; I just have a resistance to Facebook.

I guess you can't un- or de-friend her on FB.

How about posting a FB update in which you muse upon the privacy matters that arise for all of us! In awareness of which we all do, one expects, exercise caution and control over the networks through and among which our personal information may be disseminated, especially as we gain years of experience in these matters. And so huh, one expects that with due diligence, one can be confident that one's multitudinous identities and voices will remain distinct from one another.

Would the unspoken "I'm talking to you, sister-in-law" get through to her?


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:15 AM
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Oh, she already picked up on some snark I threw her way after my initial attempt to dispel her concerns through family back channels did nothing. Hence the semi-public humiliation I'm inflicting.

Facebook resistance is a good thing. If all my friends weren't there, and generally entertaining in what they post, I'd resist it too.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:26 AM
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42: wife's sister, elder by eight years.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:27 AM
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Hey, who wants to join my new Facebook Group, called "Chopper is way too fucking crude on FB"?


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:28 AM
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||

WTF, IRS? 2010 mileage rates drop from $0.55 to $0.50, despite the fact that gas on 01/01/10 is (on average) a dollar a gallon more than it was on 01/01/09?

I suspect the answer is that the rate was kept too high in 2009 in the wake of $4/gal gas, but still - get it right now.

|>


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:31 AM
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51: Have you considered cycling? Apparently, it makes you feel better no matter how high the hill or how cold it is.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:32 AM
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Hence the semi-public humiliation I'm inflicting.

Ah! You're bashing her via friend-help on Facebook? Is it too late? Do you need extra help?


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:34 AM
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52: Ha ha. I'm just looking for business expenses here.

Actually, I did see a guy biking up West Liberty Avenue when I was en route to Dormont yesterday morning. Pretty impressive.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 11:57 AM
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Not bashing. Just (hopefully) demonstrating over and over exactly how wrong she is. I asked people to search on my real name and post if they found anything other than the innocuous stuff I know about and identified in the post. For the purposes of what I'm doing, I could use some extra help, sure.

But it's not worth friending me if you're not interested in friending me otherwise (and I'm not hurt if you or anyone else from Unfogged doesn't want to friend me). I update frequently and try to be funny or at least interesting, even if I am foulmouthed.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 12:00 PM
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54: Best case: cold, tired, wet, and have pissed-off hundreds. Worst case: Dead.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 12:01 PM
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||
Anyone who creates a web page containing audio or video that automatically plays when the page loads should be shot. Advertizers who do this should be shot twice.
|>


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 12:03 PM
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But it's not worth friending me if you're not interested in friending me otherwise

My sole Facebook identity is under my real name and is used chiefly for old friends (and, like, their mothers) and professional contacts. I don't therefore extend it to unfogged persons who might be Crude! in their Posts!

One of these days I might should set up a second identity. Then I can connect with those who are interesting even if foulmouthed.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 12:20 PM
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Firzst attempt at commentikng via Sdroid. Getting fingers modified to fit keys. Being very nearsighted is an advantage.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 12:26 PM
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If your fingers are too fat to use the keyboard, and you would like to order a special typing wand, please mash the keyboard now.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 12:40 PM
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I'm glad that having fat fingers isn't among my complaints. Eyes don't work as well as I'd like -- check. Back hurts -- check. Fat fingers? No! Excellent!


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:13 PM
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My fingers hurt when it is cold.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:16 PM
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When I eat I too many crackers, I can't whistle.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:19 PM
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Even though you hwistle?

My toes get cold if I don't wriggle them enough.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:24 PM
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My back hurts from standing around while the Verizon people try to get the DE's phone to connect to net. Mine did that OK but wouldn't xfer all my contacts.


Posted by: Biohazard | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:27 PM
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We have a cell phone where all calls go directly to voicemail. And we can't stop it. Probably have to get an iPhone.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:34 PM
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59 is not destined for use in Motorola advertising.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:35 PM
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My toes get cold if I don't wriggle them enough.

From eating crackers?


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:36 PM
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My cat's breath smells like cat food.


Posted by: Ralph Wiggum | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:40 PM
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68: From reading too much hogwash about the relative merits of "home in" and "hone in", more likely. Neither of which is used by normal people anyway.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:40 PM
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70: I only started caring about 45 minutes ago. Now I feel like trolling Language Log because they disagree with me.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 1:45 PM
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66: Don't do it.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 2:22 PM
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We have a cell phone where all calls go directly to voicemail ...and we consider it a resounding success.

Fixed.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 3:05 PM
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72: That's not the conclusion I draw from your link.

I mean, it's rather a tossup among them all. The iPhone's more expensive at the top end, but you're getting 4X the storage, etc. Point being, unless you prioritize cash out of pocket above all, you've got to look at particulars (ease of use, network coverage, whatever).


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 3:23 PM
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The chart in 72 is pretty silly. What is it supposed to be informing people of?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 3:31 PM
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Why don't they put this thing in front of the passenger seat, where the driver can't see it? The way to use the net in the car is to delegate it to the passenger. It's the navigator's seat.


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 3:41 PM
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That it's cheaper to get the new Google phone in the long run? (I should also have specified that I hate iTunes, am on a PC, am irked that if I want to use my iPhone I have to interact with iTunes on a daily basis when I otherwise wouldn't.)


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 4:25 PM
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77: but at the bottom end (and that's where I am - it's my only business phone, but I don't need anything like unlimited voice and messaging), it's a few hundred dollars over 24 months for a phone with a lot less memory. That's hardly a slam-dunk.

Anyway, hey, if you hate Apple interfaces, then there's no reason to buy an Apple product. You shouldn't need a chart to determine that.

PS - Why "on a daily basis"? I plug my phone into my computer maybe once a week. I guess I sync via MobilMe though, which you clearly don't. But still, daily?


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:40 PM
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77: it's cheaper to not get a smartphone.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 6:43 PM
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A cow-orker just got a Droid, which has a tendency to at random intervals say in a funny robot voice "Drrroooiiiddd." Probably this is telling him he has a new message or something, but he hasn't figured out how to use it enough yet to know why it's saying that or how to make it stop.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:00 PM
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74, 78--Oh, and I hate the crappy service, too. (I've had Verizon and T-Mobile before, both kcked AT&ts ass for connectivity, voice and data both.)

Look, I don't actually hate my phone. iTunes pisses me off primarily because I can't get it to Autoload by album, and I resent the DRM associated with the store. Daily would be hyperbole except I've been dicking around with different apps lately. (And I think the app store is an irritating kludge.)

All that being said, it's still the best phone I've ever had. I'm just saying the newer Android phones are cheaper or equivalent, get better service, are DRM-free, and have open platforms. The storage thing is a minus, but 4 GB is still a lot of media, and if you throw in streaming Rhapsody or Songbird, you're really never going to be hurting for fresh content.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:03 PM
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Oh, christ, I never use the store.

The Droids look neat, and I'd like to play with one, but I'm doubtful about the UI. I'm happy to be proven wrong, of course, and the iPhone dearly needs some competition, but as I say, I'd need to be proven wrong.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 01- 7-10 7:05 PM
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crappy Texas public school textbooks

This is the single most important reason to turn Texas blue. We're trying, I swear.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 01- 8-10 3:49 PM
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Also, fake accent won the thread in 3 & 4. I don't know what the rest of you are on about.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 01- 8-10 3:50 PM
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