Re: Something something tight end something.

1

I have often thought the NFL needed more fisting, like in the college game.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 8:09 PM
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Eugene Volokh is running the mortality statistics for gay men vs. football ballers as we speak.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 8:14 PM
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3

A convenient applicator means no messy creams.
-- La Rochefoucauld


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 8:25 PM
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Meanwhile, Queerty hates, hates, hates the ad.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 8:49 PM
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I'm right with you on the score. The game is due for a blowout and Manning makes a likely victim.


Posted by: Klug | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:00 PM
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I'm right with you on the score. The game is due for a blowout and Manning makes a likely victim.

For those of us that don't follow football this could almost be part of the text of the ad.


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:12 PM
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God I hope that twit loses. Go saints!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:15 PM
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8

Particularly given that Manning is famous for come-from-behind victories.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:15 PM
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9

7 to 2.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:16 PM
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10

Manning vs. Fisting? Everyone's a winner!

Also: Tim Tebow's Doritos ad.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:24 PM
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While watching that, I actually thought "Tacos at Midnight" was just dumb enough to be a real Doritos flavor. Then I figured, eh, satire. But no, apparently its real.

We live in a stupid, stupid world.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:49 PM
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I'm the last person to dismiss political questions in popular culture, but this whole business of privileging Superbowl ads as the ne plus ultra of sites of contestation strikes me as a bit over the top. For one thing, the publicity around Superbowl advertising means that the ads aren't received in the same way audiences receive other ads. Especially now, with YouTube, but even before that, when people watch the Superbowl, they are actually watching the ads, actively analyzing and commenting on them, often in groups. That's not really what you're supposed to do with TV advertising. I think it would be much more fruitful to look at daytime and late-night advertising, when advertisers have a much larger expectation that their ads will reach stupefied, easily swayed people. (And yes, I'm aware that there is some stupefaction involved with Superbowl viewing, but I don't think the ads are generally aimed at the drunkest Superbowl audiences.)


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:50 PM
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13

The production values on that ad are super low. There is no way they really intended to pay 2.5 million if CBS oked it.


Posted by: Lemmy caution | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 9:56 PM
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14

That's not really what you're supposed to do with TV advertising.

But doesn't this particular audience set a different expectation and sorta thereby create a different genre of ad? It's like the difference between campaign ads that are meant to be played on TV and the ones that get floated online to create buzz.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:06 PM
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13: Oh, I'm pretty certain they expected it would get rejected, and even hoped it would be so that there would be news stories and posts just like this one. They've probably had 10x as many hits in the past 48 hours than in the site's entire history combined.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:17 PM
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I don't think we'll see a blowout. In the 70s the AFC was just much better than the NFC, and in the 80s and 90s, the NFC was much better. Plus, cocaine. So there was this trend of blowouts.

Now teams can't stockpile players in the way they once could, and the NFC and AFC are about the same. And somehow it seems unlikely that one of these teams is going say fuck it, let's just do it up all night on Saturday.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:21 PM
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14: Well, yeah, that's what I'm saying: Superbowl ads are this once-a-year genre that doesn't really have as much impact as advertising as many more mundane genres of TV ad.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:25 PM
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11: Even worse than that, it's actually "late night tacos at midnight." Tomorrow I think I'll have a noon middle of the day siesta nap at 12:00 p.m.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:25 PM
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More specifically, it's one of two "Late Night" flavors. "Tacos at Midnight" and "Last Call Jalapeño Popper"


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:29 PM
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I'm looking forward to the "Early Morning" flavors they should be test marketing next year. I'm guessing Breakfasttime Belgian Waffle and Sunrise Biscuits 'n Gravy.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:34 PM
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Then there's "Last Call Jalapeno Popper At The Mineshaft," possessed of a flavor all its own, and most often performed by Abelardo on dead joke night.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:37 PM
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20: I think it would be more like "9 a.m. Walk Of Shame Huevos Rancheros Breakfast Doritos" and "Rolling Out Of Bed Hungover In The Late Afternoon God Get This Horrible Taste Out Of My Mouth WTF Did Something Die In There Cool Mint Doritos"


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:38 PM
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23

"Now, isn't he a tight end?" "He was."


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 01-30-10 10:58 PM
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Tacos at Midnight is an adequate doritos flavor. I bought a bag. Jalepeño Poppers, not so much. There's only so many directions you can take the tortilla chip concept, really. Not a huge amount of room for innovation.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 12:59 AM
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That is, TaM, Nacho Cheese, and Spicy Nacho all cluster fairly closely in flavor space. TaM, despite the flashy black and neon bag (what attracted me to the product, tbh), is not a Doritos paradigm shift or anything.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 1:03 AM
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Biscuits 'n Gravy would be.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 5:19 AM
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We live in a stupid, stupid world.

Doritos have Electrolytes!


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 6:43 AM
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There's a midnight cheeseburger flavor that is also only adequate. The buffalo cool ranch is actually pretty tasty. I bought both for cards and MMA with the boys last night. Neither, however, will make it into the regular chip flavor rotation, though.

(Speaking of MMA: Damn, Herschel Walker. 47 years old.)


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 7:12 AM
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But can "Tacos at Midnight" recreate the "Runs in the Morning" experience?


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 7:40 AM
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No kidding about Herschel. Granted the guy they put in there against him looked completely lost, but still. Also, Lawler's KO of Mannhoef? Talk about turning the tide in a flash.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 7:41 AM
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Tacos at Midnight is an adequate doritos flavor. I bought a bag. Jalepeño Poppers, not so much.

Hmm, I find just the opposite to be true.


Posted by: CJB | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 7:58 AM
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32

On Doritos flavoring powder.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 8:17 AM
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33

32: Sounds similar to the behavior of Corn starch which is a listed ingredient.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 8:27 AM
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30: Yeah. I thought he was done, and then one damn punch and the other guy is KO'd.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 8:32 AM
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33: Cornstarch speaker fun.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 8:35 AM
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36

It's the sighing that I like.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 8:43 AM
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37

Apo, did you catch Obama briefly in the announcer's booth at the G'town/Duke game yesterday? It was early in the 2nd half with Duke down, and he did point out that Reggie Love was probably the most nervous person there.

And fuckety-fuck, stupidly went to ESPN to see the final score in that game and got nailed with the Federer-Murray result which I was trying to not know while watching the replay. (It never works when I try this.)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 8:54 AM
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36: Jewish men all took note of that.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 8:55 AM
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39

And fuckety-fuck, stupidly went to ESPN to see the final score in that game and got nailed with the Federer-Murray result which I was trying to not know while watching the replay. (It never works when I try this.)

You need a cut-out who will check and report to you only what you want to know.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:01 AM
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40

His stint behind the mic I didn't see. I was mostly out with the kids in the snow. They showed him in the stands several times while I was inside, though.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:09 AM
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That's kind of an interesting idea for a firefox plugin; "No Spoilers" would change the text color (or whatever) of any text of any page you visit that matched an event you were going to watch later.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:11 AM
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42

41 to 39.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:11 AM
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Here's a YouTube of his stint behind the mic. Better towards the end.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:35 AM
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That is, TaM, Nacho Cheese, and Spicy Nacho all cluster fairly closely in flavor space.

I misread TaM as Ttam and got so confused.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:42 AM
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That's kind of an interesting idea for a firefox plugin; "No Spoilers" would change the text color (or whatever) of any text of any page you visit that matched an event you were going to watch later.

Great idea. Even better would be new, official html tags, so that [spoiler] [/spoiler] would be recognized by your browser and automatically hidden unless you clicked something.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:46 AM
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There's only so many directions you can take the tortilla chip concept, really. Not a huge amount of room for innovation.

Not true! Turkish Doritos are delicious and don't taste anything like any American Dorito I've ever had. (Then again, I haven't had any of these new-fangled Doritos, just Nacho Cheese, Cool Ranch, and Salsa Verde.)

Hm, according to Wikipedia Doritos released a "Mountain Dew" flavor a couple of years ago. That sounds... not good.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 9:50 AM
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If Mountain Dew can have a "World of Warcraft" flavor, (or co-branding), then Doritos should have a "Texts From Last Night" flavor.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 10:02 AM
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48

One of the characters in Hijinks Ensue regularly eats Doritos with peanut butter.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 10:55 AM
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49

||

OT bleg: could someone who has access to JSTOR send me a .pdf of Michael Scriven's Professorial Ethics? (Just follow the helpful link.) I can get it through interlibrary loan, but I want to cite it in a proposal that is due tomorrow.

Ironically, when I worked at institutions that offered access to JSTOR, I compulsively saved every article I encountered on JSTOR to my hard drive. In fact, when I first got access to JSTOR, I would print them out and file them away. Finally, I said to myself "Self, you can save some effort here. JSTOR isn't going away, and as long as you work in academe you will have access to it, and if you don't work in academe, you won't need access to it. Shortly thereafter, I read a bunch of Scriven's work, including this essay, without saving it to my hard drive. Grr.

|>


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 10:55 AM
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Coming your way.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 11:00 AM
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Huh, that's odd, my name appears to still be in the name field. Let's try again!


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 11:01 AM
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52

Must have deleted without noticing. Good work, me. Anyway, I'll send it to you now.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 11:03 AM
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53

Thanks shrub, file received!


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 11:18 AM
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54

re:OP:

Neither football nor MMA come close to the throbbing homoeroticism of rugby; it's basically gay chicken with occasional athletics. (e.g. this)


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 11:28 AM
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One day all the sports popular in the United States will have been taken and some poor grad student is going to be reduced to arguing for the hegemonic homoeroticism of jai-alai.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 2:11 PM
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55: Have you not seen Hoho and Patxi on Mad Men? "I'm terrified of Patxi catching balls in the face."


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 2:28 PM
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And fuckety-fuck, stupidly went to ESPN to see the final score in that game and got nailed with the Federer-Murray result which I was trying to not know while watching the replay.

Given the score, I'd have seen this as saving me time. But I'm not much of a tennis fan, partly on the basis of too many tape-delayed not really worth watching finals on the west coast back when I used to watch more tennis.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 2:36 PM
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Wow, 54 is a gold mine. I especially liked the bit about the NZ Cancer Society using the picture as an ad for prostate cancer. Brilliant work, Kiwis.


Posted by: F | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 6:08 PM
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56: I decline to watch Mad Men. It just sounds like Entourage for people who can read but don't really want to.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 6:15 PM
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59: Wrong!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 6:32 PM
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59:Maybe


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 7:01 PM
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62: Exactly right!


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 01-31-10 7:12 PM
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The Saints front four pounded old man Favre last week, yet it took a coin toss for an OT field goal to win. What makes you think they'll get to Manning?

On a related note, what is the over/ under on Manning having some kind of dark secret, a la Tiger or as suggested, a closet case?


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 02- 1-10 11:19 AM
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Study: 100 Percent Of Americans Lead Secret Lives


Posted by: Lemmy Caution | Link to this comment | 02- 1-10 1:48 PM
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I'm actually really pissed that they're running the Tebow ad (my default reaction to any expression of forced-birth sentiment) and a little pissed that they're not running the Mancrunch or whatever ad. I don't particularly care about football, either, though I feel a weak, secondhand loyalty to the Saints, so I'm running out of reasons to watch. On the other hand, we can watch it in HD, so I'm probably going to watch it after all.

I sincerely hope Manning is not a closet case because we don't want him. You'll know, though, if Troy Aiken runs out onto the field and has mad gay sex with him while shouting that he hopes nobody notices.

ObReminiscence: my first boyfriend was a football player and his position really was tight end.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 02- 3-10 12:01 PM
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Troy Aiken

Aikman. Mandom.

What makes you think they'll get to Manning?

Minnesota averaged 29.4 points/game during the regular season. The Saints allowed them 28. Indy averaged 26.0/game. 24 sounds about right. The Colts D is likely to be lining up without Dwight Freeney. I expect Brees will light them up.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 02- 3-10 12:20 PM
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Aikman.

Sorry, it must be the shadow Clay Aiken burned onto the gaydar screen of every queen for three states.

Yesterday on my way to work I was behind someone with multiple Aiken bumper stickers and an "I'D RATHER BE AT A CLAY AIKEN CONCERT" license plate frame. I get wanting to back a hometown boy, but Christ.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 02- 3-10 1:02 PM
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