Re: "Let every day americans get a $100 prize for each illegal they catch. "

1

horsepeepee writes:

This country very great cuontry. But we too soft on a peple who comit a crime. In mine father cuontry where come from long time go, policemans holding down a criminal and make caca on his chest. this very much stop a criminal from ever want to make other crime in a future. Even in mine home state of mississippis we need police to make caca on criminal thugs. please think through mine idea. Thank you.

Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:40 PM
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Here's one to file under "Republicans having to wade through the fruits of their labor": Rand Paul on mountaintop removal mining:

"I don't think anyone's going to be missing a mountain or two."

Wow.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:45 PM
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Let's change all Christmas songs to have happier endings.

As in the Three Kings don't warn Mary and Joseph about the coming slaughter of the innocents?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:45 PM
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As Milbank says, it's hard to tell the difference between genuine Republican nutters and parody.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:45 PM
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Well I suppose it sounded like a good idea at the meeting. It is not outside the realm of possibility that a good idea be presented in this forum, but I mean, really. Who is the staffer that gets to look for the needle in the haystack? Just like youtube has something like 10 years of video uploaded every minute, but who has time to watch?


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:47 PM
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Wow, 4 gets it right. Let's play "truth or parody?":

"Invade and destroy any country that doesn't agree to cancel our debt. Forcibly extract payment from countries who owe us money."

"We don't need national (socialist) health care! We already have national, free health PRAYER!"

"The moment the Republicans take back the House, the Obama Death Panels should be stripped from the Health Care bill, and Obama should be impeached."


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:48 PM
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English as our first langauage! Okay I am college graduate very accomplished women, I playe hard to earn my grades. Now I job searching for the last two years. I guess what?... do not speak spanish just english and I get trune down from the job. I am sick of this treamnet. I am half mexican and amercian, however I am a Republican since 1980. I attended a college and undergrad, now I am mother of one, and I will raise her one other way. Nonsence why should we have to learn a second language when we (USA) american have already have a language.

Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:51 PM
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6: I'm thinking the middle one is a parody.

The other two I believe are the genuine stink.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:53 PM
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7: Can that be real? I shudders.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:54 PM
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Are these fantasies any worse than Tom Friedman's wanting a dictatorship like China's, just for a little while to get things done?


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 2:58 PM
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9: You would trune down this women one other way? Do you guess what?... hate Amarica?


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:00 PM
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"Protect the sanctity of life by 'taking care of' everybody who supports abortion. "

"Instead of morning announcements, all elenentary and high schools should be required to play Glenn Beck or Rush Limbaugh's radio broadcasts."

"Perhaps we could come up with some kind of final solution for immigration, whereby we could deport illegal immigrants and other undesirables to make living space for honest American citizens, granting them the assets of those who have broken our laws to enhance their lives and America."


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:00 PM
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10
Are these fantasies any worse than Tom Friedman's wanting a dictatorship like China's, just for a little while to get things done?

Maybe not. Friedman is indeed horrible. These are a lot funnier, though.

The challenge is finding out which are serious. I'm sure at least a few are, since the page was created by Republicans, but I know there are a lot of spoofers out there.


Posted by: Cyrus | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:02 PM
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11: Shut up! I have already have a language!


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:02 PM
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I also ran across a number of:

"This comment was flagged by the community as offensive."
and
"This comment was flagged by the community as inappropriate."

Which means all those others... weren't flagged.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:02 PM
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11: I don't hate it . . . ; I don't hate it . . . I don't hate it . . . ; I don't. I don't! I don't hate it! I don't hate it!


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:04 PM
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The challenge is finding out which are serious.

I pity the intern who gets assigned this task. Like taking a sip from a fire hose.


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:05 PM
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I love you, peep.

Those Introspective Patriot posts are epic. Here's me masturbating with a flag. Here's me masturbating about the Twin Towers. Here's me masturbating...


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:05 PM
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Whoa, did they just delete all the posts under "American Values"?


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:07 PM
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Damn, man. I'm trying to create an account, but I guess the server is swamped.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:07 PM
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Ah:

Unavailable! A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now. Please wait a moment and try again.

Great website, guys! Good job!


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:08 PM
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Why do they hate people who care about American Values?


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:08 PM
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Here's a man who cares about American Values:

"Fewer taxes, more mixed martial arts."


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:09 PM
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Are these fantasies any worse than Tom Friedman's wanting a dictatorship like China's, just for a little while to get things done?

As a means of effective governance, representative democracy isn't exactly covering itself in glory at the moment.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:09 PM
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When Google has trouble finding the site, it suggests "America speak gout." I'll say.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:09 PM
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Oh, you wanted effective governance? We thought you wanted personal liberty with minimal governance. Our bad.


Posted by: Publius | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:13 PM
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That guy has a point about faster dolphins.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:21 PM
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Looks like all the ideas have disappeared...


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:21 PM
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A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.

Kiloliters? Megaliters?


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:21 PM
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DECIBELS


Posted by: OPINIONATED AMERICAN AT HIGH VOLUME | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:24 PM
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I can't believe they blanked it all. What a loss of creativity! Hopefully someone downloaded it for posterity.


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:26 PM
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Cubic feet, please, Bave. This is America.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:26 PM
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It makes me glad that the Republican party is so willing to listen to its constituency in a public forum where we can all share our real ideas about the direction our country should go in. I'm starting to see the appeal of the "free market" political economy.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:26 PM
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The site even lets you create your own tags (the best one of which is "not-that-im-gay-or-anything").

It's like the people that created the site had never seen the Internet before.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:27 PM
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And since it is advertised as *not* being associated with the 2010 campaign and is being run out of congressional offices, it is all on the the taxpayer's dime.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:28 PM
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Don't think this lets you off the hook, Dana Milbank!


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:28 PM
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Did the tube get clogged?


Posted by: Sen. Ted Stevens | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:30 PM
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I can't believe they blanked it all. What a loss of creativity! Hopefully someone downloaded it for posterity.

You can still get to the posts through the list of tags here.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:31 PM
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I went to all the trouble of signing up, and now they've taken away everything I wanted to vote for. Why do you hate democracy, congressional Republicans?
:(


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:33 PM
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"I don't think anyone's going to be missing a mountain or two."

You'd be surprised by how widespread that sentiment is among the residents of the region.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:40 PM
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Some people seem to miss the sister valley to Yosemite that we flooded, but those people are DFHs, so who cares what they miss?


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 3:50 PM
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Heh. That ain't nuttin.

http://www.internationalrivers.org/en/china/three-gorges-dam


Posted by: Three Gorges Dam | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:00 PM
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"Ice cream should only be vanilla. No more chocolate on the outside. Keep chocolate and vanilla ice cream separately. If the jews got one thing right is that you shouldn't eat shrimp and steak together."


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:07 PM
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43. Balderdash. There is nothing as American as "Surf and Turf". Take your Maoist inspired separation of foods elsewhere.


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:10 PM
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VOTE ON THIS IDEA!
Why the heck does dems really been when even as they go to as if we try to look for that detail when they spend us so we can't just vote on the term that the activist will turn over at the end of the session!?

So true, Iliketurtles. Why the heck indeed.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:17 PM
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If the jews got one thing right is that[...]

I'd like to see a whole series of comments there that use this construction.

Or a new poem thread here based on it. Whichever.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:19 PM
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I feel a new internet convention being added. It is sort of like a disturbance in the force, but not as gas painy.


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:22 PM
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If the jews got one thing right is that walls make fantastic neighbors.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:23 PM
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If the Jews got one thing right it's that you don't need your whole dick.


Posted by: Andrew Sullivan | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:25 PM
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I can't find the one I ran across a while ago that made the argument that the Bible clearly only allows Christians to marry, and now it's in the news that Jews want to get married too???!!!

I love the internet a LOT right now.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:25 PM
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If the jews got one thing right is that you shouldn't pass your children through the fire to Moloch.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:30 PM
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If the jews got one thing right is that bacon you're cooking?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:33 PM
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It's like the people that created the site had never seen the Internet before.

I don't know, I see Emerson's fingerprints all over this.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:41 PM
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BWAHAHAHA! You'll never catch me! I've become more powerful than you can even imagine!


Posted by: The Ghost of Emerson | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:47 PM
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Fucking sweet:

The 1st Amendment dictates that all Americans may practice their religion as they like, but, since the wearing of a hijab is a clear and present danger to national security, some compromise must be found. Therefore, from this day hence, the hijab should be banned. However, since I am mindful of the desire of Muslims to remain humble in the eyes of Allah, from this day forth, all Muslim women may, in place of a hijab, wear a Spiderman costume instead. This will remove the security threat and allow Muslim women to remain completely covered at all times.

Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:53 PM
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It's pretty gutsy of the RNC to just admit they have absolutely no ideas and ask their voters to whip up a platform for them. I think that's kind of a first in politics, or American politics anyway.

But aren't the people on that site just echoing back to them the things they're reading from mouthpieces of the conservative movement that the RNC spearheads? Where are the new ideas supposed to come from? It's like watching a drunk ask people to pour his vomit back in his mouth in hopes of improving his lifestyle.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 4:58 PM
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56: There are a few vague "reduce spending" comments, but most of the ones that seem to come from actual Republicans say things like "Ban all campaign donations" or "Refuse to pay Congress unless they show up to work at least 30 hours per week!" I.e., stuff a Republican congressperson would never support or vote for. I'm not seeing a lot of platform echoing going on.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:02 PM
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So...I signed up with a profile and started submitting ideas, and then I noticed that somehow the site had switched me to someone else's username and avatar. I can't switch back! So now some poor random dude from East Greenbush NY will, if he ever checks the site again, find an odd bunch of comments attributed to him.

Anyhoo, the site's pretty buggy.


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:07 PM
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57. That's the conundrum for the RNC, isn't it. There is real power and passion in the Tea Partiers, but what the saner one's want would directly cut the power of Congress to the point of being no fun to be a Congressman anymore, so who do they think will vote for it?


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:07 PM
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I dunno, DS, this one doesn't seem to spring from conservative movement mouthpieces: "The GOP needs to do the following things in order to regain the support of the American people, as well as to help our great Country. 1. Help to strengthen our social safety net. No one should be hungry in America. 2. Invest more heavily in protection and restoration of the environment of our Nation. 3. Make sure that public schools from kindergarten through 12th grade are strong and free from political bias, such as the shameful display recently seen in TX. 4. Make college affordable to all would would like to go. 5. Improve workplace safety laws, make it safe to do a good day's work. 5. Increase the minimum wage."

And it's got 11 votes!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:10 PM
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This one is pretty good:
Stop teaching Arabic numerals. It's un-American. We need real American numbers.

I have a feeling that this is what a lot of talk radio would sound like if they didn't screen the calls to exclude liberals et al. The Republicans in congress are so stupid that they don't recognize talk radio as theater and no doubt had no clue that this website would wind up as enormous joke.


Posted by: Middle Aged Man | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:10 PM
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I'm kind of sad that it's all joke comments now. The earlier ones were funnier because possibly real.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:30 PM
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What, did Comcast send its employees over to comment or something?

"End the idea of Net Neutrality. American's do not need the government censoring our websites for us. Leave the internet alone. "


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:51 PM
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Fix the plumbing in my apartment so I can shower after my run in a couple of hours. And don't use brown people to do it this time. They make the water turn yellow and give me gas when I drink it straight from the tap like a water hose
My. Chippy in there.
Don't you just hate it when you get ready for bed, and just when you begin to settle in under the nice comfy sheets and fluff your pillow you realize-- you kinda have to go to the bathroom?
m, yes, yes oh, yes
Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:52 PM
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A very high volume of Americans are speaking out right now.

Please wait a moment and try again.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 5:55 PM
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So does John Boehner ever go on the Sunday talking head shows? I would really, really like to see someone question him closely about how this initiative went.

Eh, the script is right there already, though: the site was infiltrated, infiltrated, I tell you! The coastal elites are so snotty they wouldn't leave room for the real Americans to speak! It was a set-up!


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 6:01 PM
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the site was infiltrated, infiltrated, I tell you! The coastal elites are so snotty they wouldn't leave room for the real Americans to speak! It was a set-up!

But...that is in fact true. Except for "Americans" which should be "Republicans".


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 6:03 PM
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Anyhoo, the site's pretty buggy.

Thank God that the Rent-a-Boy website works better than this one.

Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 6:04 PM
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I'm pretty sure this one's not parody:

"Here are my ideas for solving the illegal alien problem. Since our jails are filled with illegal aliens I propose we subcontract a prison in Guatamala. We then could make it mandatory that all illegal aliens go directly there. We'd save million in prison costs and the citizens of Guatamala would gain a source of income that would directly put money into their economy, thus providing job and helping to prevent illegal immigration. "


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 6:12 PM
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They do mostly seem to be jokes now, but this one is at least upfront about it:

My neighbor made a Republican website that can't withstand more than two people posting at once, despite having "NASA technology". Please arrest him, or at the very least, ridicule his stupid website.

Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 6:14 PM
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I just created an account and submitted some ideas to "Job Creation".


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 6:33 PM
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I'd love to read your awesome job-creating ideas, Goneril, but the VERY HIGH VOLUME of Americans speaking out right now won't let me.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 8:06 PM
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And now I'm getting a runtime error. They iz doin it rong.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 8:07 PM
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71: Is this you? "We should invent and patent more colors. Like fuchsia, but not that because it's already been invented."


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 8:10 PM
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If the Jews got one thing right is that when writing lines of poetry

Oh wait that was the octometricality thread. Oh well. I was never gonna get out of that rhyme alive anyway.

(Grow a tree.)


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 9:28 PM
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Do--a tree, a female tree.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 9:49 PM
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75.last: In casting about for a rhyme came across apretty great word variant:

alcoholometry - The process of estimating the percentage of pure or absolute alcohol in a spirituous liquid. Sometimes contracted to alcoömetry.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-26-10 9:55 PM
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"I have watched saddly as what use to be a proud and intelligent GOP (although not perfect) cannibalised itself into a state of shear ignorance. W.Buckly, R.Regan and A.Lincoln are rolling over in thier graves"


Posted by: (damn it Jim, I'm a) lurker | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 1:11 AM
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||

Off to the wilds of Staten Island for court. I'll probably be eaten by lions.

|>


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 5:07 AM
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There's some Republican here who wants to add an amendment to some bill that would allow the police to seize the cars of people they suspect to be illegal immigrants. He's from the South Shore, if anyone knows anyone living in that area.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 5:07 AM
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This is happening here too. All candidates for the Labour leadership who have a serious chance of winning getting on the final ballot, are competing for the racist anti-immigration vote. This is after the BNP was wiped out in local government less than a month ago. I'm actually rather scared.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 5:40 AM
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Off to the wilds of Staten Island for court.

I went to Staten Island for the first time just a few weeks ago. Staten Island: NYC's red state borough.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 6:05 AM
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No lions actually on the ferry. From the water SI looks surprisingly civilized. Will report if attacked by wildlife en route to courthouse.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 6:59 AM
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Come on, LB. Lots of people live on Staten Island. No more than a few can be eaten by wildlife every day.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 7:40 AM
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No more than a few can be eaten by wildlife every day.

You goddamn liberals and your quotas.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 7:42 AM
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I think the traditional joke applies.


Posted by: widget | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 7:44 AM
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The process of estimating the percentage of pure or absolute alcohol in a spirituous liquid. Sometimes contracted to alcoömetry.

Also known as "drinking shots". "Yep. That's 40% alright."


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 7:54 AM
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This may be a fluky courtroom, but SI attys are young. NY county, Brooklyn, Queens, Bronx, the modal litigator at a randomly chosen motion calendar call is a fiftysomething man. I'm sitting in a courtroom full of thirtysomethings -- opposing counsel on my case is older than me, but I don't think anyone else is.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 7:57 AM
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People are fascinated by my anthropological comments on SI, right?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 7:58 AM
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76: It's been done.


Posted by: Cyrus | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:00 AM
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Everybody's waiting for the lions.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:00 AM
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Had you really never been to Staten Island before?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:01 AM
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I'm waiting for the lions
Briefcase of court briefs in my hand
Up Staten Island, long ferry ride
Feel sick and dirty, more dead than alive
I'm waiting for the lions

Hey, lawyer lady, what you doin' downtown?
Hey, lawyer lady, you chasin' our wildlife around?
Oh pardon me sir, it's the furthest from my mind
I'm just lookin' for some dear, dear friends of mine
I'm waiting for the lions


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:04 AM
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I'd ridden the ferry, certainly. I honestly can't remember if I'd ever left the ferry terminal. Seems as if I should have, sometime, but I can't recall it.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:05 AM
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89: Sure.

93: I can't decide whether my happiness that you chose Velvet Underground outweighs my disappointment that you didn't choose Loverboy.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:07 AM
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Staten Island is the most suburban borough in New York City[citation needed]

Wikipedia is offended on Staten Island's behalf.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:07 AM
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94: This is my exact situation. I've ridden the ferry -- oh! and I've driven across going from NJ to JFK airport.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:08 AM
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I'll probably be eaten by lions.

Hello Unfogged, Hello my fans,
Here I am on Staten Island
Court is very entertaining
And I think we'll have fun when we start arraigning.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:10 AM
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Hey, lawyer lady, what you doin' downtown?

Staten Island, the real downtown.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:11 AM
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I went to Staten Island and found a lion in the courtroom
Rushed out into the lobby screaming Lion! Lion!
Two locals pulled their heavily gelled hair and banged the window shut
I hurried home and stayed two days

Got on line to the Mineshaft
who'd banned me for posting an extensive analogy involving shrimp
'It's happened' I panted 'There's a Lion in my courtroom'
'In Wisconsin dot com' they replied and logged off


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:12 AM
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99: downtown's just a direction, Stormcrow.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:15 AM
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YOU KNOW ABOUT THEM FUCKIN' KIDS LAWYERS FROM STATEN THEY SMASHIN' EVERYTHING IN ANY SHAPE FORM OR FASHION.


Posted by: OPINIONATED GZA | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:15 AM
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101: downtown's just a direction, Stormcrow.

Precisely. The direction in which Staten Island lies starting from civilization.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:22 AM
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ABA AIN'T NOTHIN' TA FUCK WIT.


Posted by: OPINIONATED RZA | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:22 AM
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100 is great.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:23 AM
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Indeed.


Posted by: Kobe | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:25 AM
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Hey I'm Walking Here is doing a walk across Staten Island pretty soon. This saturday!

"""
This Saturday (5/29) I'll be leading a walk through beautiful Staten Island. Yes, I said beautiful. Pristine beaches, overgrown forests, hillside mansions, a mountain vista and a slice at Joe and Pat's. Okay, there'll also be an abandoned highway, but we'll just be walking on that because it's cool. Expect this to take a whole (awesome) day--18 miles in total. We'll be ending at a beach so if you're up for swimming bring a suit. There'll be a place to change.

Meet at 8:45am under the first "S" in the big Staten Island ferry sign outside the Manhattan Staten Island Ferry Terminal. We'll be going rain or shine. Don't be late or you'll miss the boat!

Ned


Full route description: St. George, Silver Lake Park, Grymes Hill, Wagner College, Clove Lakes Park, Todt Hill, Staten Island's "greenbelt" trails, Moses' Mountain, Lighthouse Hill, Historic Richmond, St. Andrew's Church, Great Kills national park and beach. There'll be convenient chances to duck out at miles 6.5 and 14. (This is a combination of the first halves of HIWH walks #13 and #30.)
"""


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:25 AM
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107: Todt Hill, highest point on the eastern seacoast south of Maine.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:27 AM
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107: It's pretty irresponsible of Ned not to mention, not even cryptically, the danger of being eaten by lions.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:27 AM
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110

Todt Hill, highest point on the eastern seacoast south of Maine.[citation needed]


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:28 AM
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111

.com


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:29 AM
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||
Attention Pittsburghers! This dude is a friend and generally awesome guy. You should go see his show if you are into artsy-type things.
|>


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:31 AM
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110: This is disputed by the Twin Lights of Atlantic Highlands, NJ (about which the very same thing is said, "highest point south of Maine"). Kraab and I said the Highlands win.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:32 AM
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110: [citation needed]


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:32 AM
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114: Wikipedia fight!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:35 AM
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114:

This article needs additional citations for verification.

Please help improve this article by adding reliable references. Unsourced material may be challenged and removed. (December 2008)


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:38 AM
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Geez. Maybe the world really is ending in 2012.

"A second, much larger volcano in Iceland is showing signs that it may be about to erupt, scientists have warned."

"The threat of an above-average 2010 Atlantic hurricane season has increased over the last month and it now promises to be 'very active,' a leading forecaster said Wednesday. The warning comes as the season also sees an unusual factor added to the mix: the Gulf oil disaster."

Spending the next couple years in a barbiturate haze is starting to look appealing.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:41 AM
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Global Warming: it sux!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:44 AM
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Team Monmouth Co.! Duh!

Also, a friend from college's family had one of these bungalows. The link doesn't give all the info, but basically what happened was Robert Moses eminent domained them back in the 50s, but when nothing was done with the land the families all quietly moved back. Sometime afterwards, the city (state?), unwilling to give or sell back the land, but not intending to do anything with it, gave the families leases for their bungalows (but the land stayed public, I think). And so it went for about 50 years until last summer when the city (state?) told the family that it would not be renewing the leases. Much grumbling ensued since no one is sure that there is any money to actually do anything with the land in the short term.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:47 AM
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112: On the one hand, sounds interesting. On the other hand, it costs 12 bucks and would require driving a couple of miles.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:51 AM
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That is, global warming sux.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:53 AM
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114, 115: How could we possibly ever resolve this?

Todt Hill 410 ft., Mount Mitchill 266 ft.
And citing Cadillac Mountain is also wrong as Mt. Megunticook (1385 ft) in the Camden Hills of Maine (and south of Acadia) shows.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:55 AM
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122: Dude, [citation needed]!


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:58 AM
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120 to 117.last.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 8:59 AM
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125

This is a very strange sentence to read: "NJ bordered Morocco," until you see that it is completed with "245 million years ago."


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:00 AM
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123: Trust me, I'm a map nerd.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:01 AM
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123/26, etc: The dispute is actually about "coastal elevation." Mount Mitchill is a cliff, basically, while Todt Hill is more or less mid-island. So the Mount Mitchill stats are comparing sea cliff to sea cliff (I think).


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:06 AM
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The Monmouth County parks people get it right: At 266 feet, this overlook in Atlantic Highlands sits on the highest natural elevation on the Atlantic seaboard (excluding islands).


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:08 AM
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127: Mitchill is a lot closer to the water.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:09 AM
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It's time to come clean, Stormcrow: this was all a plot to get you to type Megunticook.

Megunticook! Megunticook! Heeeeeey Megunticook!

Boy does Maine have the best names ever.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:09 AM
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129: I thought that is what I was saying?


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:10 AM
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131: I meant that to express agreement with you, sorry.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:16 AM
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130: Apparently: mecadacut or megunticook: Penobscot: "/amehkáyihtekok/ 'at a stream below a height (or mountain)'


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:18 AM
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132: No apologies! I was genuinely confused! Sometimes I find I have said the opposite of what I meant.

In any event, my brother's house is on one of the cliffs facing the harbor, and it is pretty cool to see lower Manhattan laid out gaudily before you from his living room. It was much more dramatic when, uh, there were these other big buildings there.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 9:24 AM
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134: I'm jealous of your brother!

After high school, my brother shared an apartment in the Highlands with a couple of friends. They were (they claim) so broke that they ate pasta with margarine -- couldn't even afford the butter.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:07 AM
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Also, can we talk about how much Gov. Christie sucks? Because he, like, totally sucks.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:11 AM
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135: Well, he just bought an uglier house in a worse location, for reasons known only to him. (It's in R-m-s-n, but ugly and tiny, and who the heck wants to live there unless you're sending kids to the school or something.)

The Highlands used to be kind of sketchy, but now there is a nifty catamaran that takes you to Manhattan in 35 minutes, and so it's become a desirable place for people to move. Housing costs are going up-up-up and rental units are disappearing and this is becoming a *thing.*

Wasn't Clerks filmed in the Highlands? I think Kevin Smith went to Henry Hudson or whatever that high school is called.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:13 AM
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R-m-s-n

The schools in Ryumonsoon are fabulous.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:15 AM
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136: A devil man. Seriously -- deeply fucking awful. Even folks who were inclined to vote for him aren't taking kindly to the deliberate destruction of one of the very, very best public school systems in the country.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:15 AM
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138: It's Rumson! I can't even place hyphens correctly!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:16 AM
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In his incarnation as the utterly unsympathetic and seemingly empty-skulled prosecutor in this TAL episode, Chris Christie was hated by me years before all you people.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:20 AM
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All the animals come out on Staten Island -- lions, echidnas, giraffes, pangolins, snail darters, pit bulls, marmosets, sick, venal -- someday a real rain will come and wash all the scum off the streets.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 10:28 AM
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Speaking of high stuff, I recently walked up this lovely thing for the umpteenth time. High! (But not coastal.)


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 11:29 AM
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Has no one yet noted that Boehner is just the man to cock the mole that afflicts us?


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 11:49 AM
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Boy does Maine have the best names ever.

I'll see your Megunticook and raise you a Manunka Chunk.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 11:57 AM
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Walla Walla, Wallula, Tulalip, Puyallup, Wahkiakum, Klickitat, Kittitas, and many many more.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 12:01 PM
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Damariscotta! Waldoboro! Katahdin! Vinal Haven! Agamenticus! Skowhegan! Toothacker! Androscoggin!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 12:11 PM
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Fuck it, the Australians will be along shortly anyway.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 12:13 PM
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Fair enough, but there are some more great ones here.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 12:22 PM
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Pattagumpus!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 12:22 PM
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And of course not so far from Bostonland there is Lake Chaubunagungamaug--full name Lake Chargoggonmnmnoaoananoorognonmanoerg. Also known as Webster Lake.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 12:31 PM
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My favourite is Muiceanach-idir-dhá-sháile otherwise Muckanaghederdauhaulia (press the play button at the link to hear pronunciation).


Posted by: emir | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 12:41 PM
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And who can forget Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch


Posted by: F | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 3:23 PM
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Miinaanbaashkiminisijiganbitooyinsijiganibukwayszhiigan, dammit!


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 3:36 PM
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And at the other extreme, Aiea.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 3:39 PM
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147 sounds like a litany of magic words from the New England edition of Harry Potter.
152, in Sc/tland, would be pronounced Vootchanakh-idir-ha-shale-yeh. Exactly as it's spelt, in fact. Irish Gaelic is weird.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 3:41 PM
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Algonquian languages are indeed good sources for long, funny-sounding placenames. (As are Celtic languages.)


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 3:54 PM
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Speaking of Algonquin languages, I watched "Black Robe" on TCM as per the recommendation of several people here. It started at 2:30 AM so you can imagine how intriguing I thought the movie sounded, from the discussion of it here. Verdict: haunting and great.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 3:59 PM
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humuhumunukunukuapuaa

Not a place name, but awesome nonetheless.


Posted by: F | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 4:09 PM
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Lake Chaubunagungamaug--full name Lake Chargoggonmnmnoaoananoorognonmanoerg

Fuller name Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggauggagogogchaubunagungamaugg.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 4:10 PM
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159: I'll see your humuhumunukunukuapua'a and raise you a lauwiliwilinukunukuʻoiʻoi.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 4:12 PM
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159, 161: Both of which can be seen here. If you could go there. Which you can't.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 4:16 PM
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Are we going to the hukilau?


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 05-27-10 4:23 PM
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Moody's Diner in Waldoboro, ME is awesome.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 05-28-10 4:49 AM
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