Re: If I were Andrea Miller's husband, I would be very unhappy right now

1

But the Indian people tend to be very tolerant of spousal absurdity.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:18 PM
horizontal rule
2

Wow.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:24 PM
horizontal rule
3

teo gets it exactly right.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:25 PM
horizontal rule
4

So much riduculousness. Where to even begin?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:25 PM
horizontal rule
5

Maybe here:

Before we got together, Sanjay was greatly amused by my reciting various things in Hindi to him.

Yeah, I bet he was.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:26 PM
horizontal rule
6

(She was apparently just reading random phrases out of a Hindi-English phrasebook.)


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:27 PM
horizontal rule
7

I also like her parenthetical that there are hundreds of languages in India, so you might want to figure out which one your object of romantic interest speaks. You don't say.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:28 PM
horizontal rule
8

Per Google Translate:

Kyā āpa ā apa aura mērē etchings dēkhō pasanda hai?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:32 PM
horizontal rule
9

You already got it exactly right in 2, teo. You don't have to point out that it applies to every single sentence in the piece.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:34 PM
horizontal rule
10

Most Indians are innately gracious, social creatures

Jesus Christ.

(Come, let us ponder the enigma of the Indian soul. So fond of dancing, but so fond of eating too).


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:37 PM
horizontal rule
11

kama sutra kama sutra kama sutra


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:41 PM
horizontal rule
12

Indian men are hung like the bulls they (largely) don't eat.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:41 PM
horizontal rule
13

You already got it exactly right in 2, teo. You don't have to point out that it applies to every single sentence in the piece.

Yeah, on the one hand it's so mockable, but on the other hand why make the effort?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:43 PM
horizontal rule
14

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that this exists.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:43 PM
horizontal rule
15

14: Hey, that's the Wordpress template I use!


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:45 PM
horizontal rule
16

I also kind of love:

They make up a large proportion of our graduate students -- just walk around the campuses of Harvard, Columbia or Stanford or and you will see these incredibly attractive brown people all over the place.

Maybe it's just me, but when I walk around those campuses, I see incredibly attractive people of all kinds all over the place. But they're undergraduates.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:45 PM
horizontal rule
17

You must be looking in the wrong departments.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:45 PM
horizontal rule
18

16: Maybe you should try to write an article on the reasons you might want to date an undergraduate.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:49 PM
horizontal rule
19

Feministing claps back.


Posted by: Tarrou | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:49 PM
horizontal rule
20

The grad students may be attractive, but you don't see them by walking around the campuses.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:50 PM
horizontal rule
21

I was an unattractive grad student, but I recall lots of walking around the campus.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:53 PM
horizontal rule
22

I rarely even go to campus.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 10:55 PM
horizontal rule
23

Undergrads look so young to me now. I'm not sure when this happened, but it was pretty abrupt, like a duck/rabbit gestalt shift.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:02 PM
horizontal rule
24

Sometimes you do. Many are the attractive grad students I've seen while walking around campus.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:03 PM
horizontal rule
25

Yeesh, that article.

I do like Indian food, but otherwise it's a list of how to utterly fail to connect with me. Like a lot of immigrant kids born in America, I tend to find the old country sort of boring. Meanwhile, women from small towns in the South and Midwest strike me as exotic and intriguing.


Posted by: Neil the Ethical Werewolf | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:05 PM
horizontal rule
26

The post in 19 is good, as are the comments to it.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:08 PM
horizontal rule
27

Undergrads look so young to me now.

Yeah, I've noticed this too. It's odd, because they're really not that much younger than me.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:09 PM
horizontal rule
28

The last three fucking Presidents have looked young to me.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:25 PM
horizontal rule
29

24: Doesn't the number of grads almost equal undergrads at your institution? I think the gender balance (or imbalance) is fairly different, though. All those engineers or something.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:48 PM
horizontal rule
30

This may be the first time I've read, or tried to read, something at the Huffington Post that's more offensive than the sidebar. But then I didn't scroll all the way down.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:50 PM
horizontal rule
31

The post in 19 is quite good. The comments are kind of hilarious, as I'm waiting for it to move on from the involved discussion of precisely which circumstances govern whether or not saying "I really like Indian food" is racist.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 06- 5-10 11:56 PM
horizontal rule
32

It's much more polite to say "Do your people eat like this every night?" when to someone of the relevant ethnicity when eating in a restaurant serving the relevant ethnic cuisine. Also, try to work in the word "relevant."


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 12:00 AM
horizontal rule
33

Also, try to work in the word "relevant."

"How relevant would you say your ethnicity is to your diet? On a scale of 1 to 10."


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 12:01 AM
horizontal rule
34

33: It's a common survey for first dates and new friends. Also included:

"White people are well known for walking in this fashion. In what idiosyncratic way do your people typically walk? Please draw a simple representation below."


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 12:08 AM
horizontal rule
35

I was expecting How To Date A White Bitch (Advice For The Non-White Dude) already to be linked. Anyway, here it is.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 12:22 AM
horizontal rule
36

Indian men are hung like the bulls they (largely) don't eat.

Nope.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/6161691.stm

"India holds the highest number of Miss World winners, only to be tied with Venezuela."

Venezuela population: 28 million

India population: 1.1 billion

Advantage, Venezuela!


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 1:41 AM
horizontal rule
37

I went out with an Indian boy for a few years. (I say Indian, he was from Finchley.) His parents hated me. They used to like me when we were at school together and were friends, and as soon as we started going out I became far far less welcome in their house. Which was a shame, because the food there was fucking great.

Last year he, as I had always predicted, married an Asian girl. (She may be Sri Lankan? They got married in Sri Lanka.) His parents look very happy in the wedding photos.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 2:57 AM
horizontal rule
38

I've noticed that, over the past two or three years, I've heard "Indian chicks are the hottest" or similar from my Chettish white guy acquaintances more and more frequently. Never heard it before then. Clearly, there's some kind of something in the air.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 3:36 AM
horizontal rule
39

Indian men are hung like the bulls they (largely) don't eat.

Apparently not, in point of fact.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:37 AM
horizontal rule
40

Pwned by gswift.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:10 AM
horizontal rule
41

If you want to be adventurous and score some points, I suggest you try cooking him/her a few Indian dishes. You can get the basic spices in most grocery stores.

Oh honey no. It is possible that after dating this boy for a few years and expressing an interest in his mother's cooking, she will give you some recipes and maybe even some spice mixes she has made. But her son will never tolerate your attempts at Indian cooking.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:07 AM
horizontal rule
42

Also, her tips 1-3 are for amateurs. I recommend making the personal acquaintance of Viswa/nathan An/and. (Might not help with the boy, but you'll be a great hit at his family's parties.) Bonus points if his wife Aruna teaches you her rasam recipe.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:12 AM
horizontal rule
43

Indian-Americans have won 8 of the last 12 National Spelling Bees, so you'd better come correct with that shit.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:27 AM
horizontal rule
44

Bonus points if his wife Aruna teaches you her rasam recipe.

Wait, you know them? That probably helps with lots of geeks regardless of ethnicity.

WOOO GO VISHY


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:55 AM
horizontal rule
45

Yeah. More as acquaintances -- I wouldn't go visit them or anything -- but I've spent a decent amount of time with them on a few occasions. (This through my old host father in Hamburg, who is a chess journalist.)


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:07 AM
horizontal rule
46

The last three fucking Presidents have looked young to me.

Fucking presidents obviously include JFK and Clinton, but I'm not sure which one completes the triumvirate. The black one, probably.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:24 AM
horizontal rule
47

Well, according to last week's unambiguously adorable Vows column,* the way to meet hot Indian men is to holler at them from across the street. (OK, fine, the while lady doing the hollering was trying to pick him up for her Indian friend, but still.)

*Vows makes everyone seem hateful, but these folks somehow escaped.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:30 AM
horizontal rule
48

What's wrong with visibly protruding nipples as a way to meet hot Indian men?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:34 AM
horizontal rule
49

Visibly recessed nipples might also work.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:42 AM
horizontal rule
50

Given how many hot Indian men are doctors and engineers, they're the perfect people to fix any protruding nipple problems keeping you from climbing the corporate ladder.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:46 AM
horizontal rule
51

*Vows makes everyone seem hateful, but these folks somehow escaped.

Also, her name (or, well, at least what she goes by) is Dimple!


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:51 AM
horizontal rule
52

Jane Lynch and her new wife looked great in the Times. That was an ordinary wedding announcement, rather than a Vows column, though.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:06 AM
horizontal rule
53

mmmmm Indian food.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:33 AM
horizontal rule
54

Meanwhile, women from small towns in the South and Midwest strike me as exotic and intriguing.

I'm seeing an opportunity here for a great remake of The Bridges of Madison County.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:18 AM
horizontal rule
55

They arranged to meet at a Prospect Heights dive bar of her choosing

TYPICAL


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:26 AM
horizontal rule
56

30: This may be the first time I've read, or tried to read, something at the Huffington Post that's more offensive than the sidebar.

God yes.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:30 AM
horizontal rule
57

52: Whoa, this whole time I've been under the misapprehension that Glee was a reality TV show. Whoops.

47: Adorable indeed. I was cracking up over the age comments in particular (the bride is a whopping 3 years older than the groom):

"I'm glad you called," he said when he answered. They arranged to meet at a Prospect Heights dive bar of her choosing. He knew it was her when she walked in, partly because "she was gorgeous -- a sight to behold," he said, and partly because he'd looked her up online.
She had yet to type his name into any search box. "Didn't dawn on me," Ms. Chaudhary said. "That shows our age difference."

[...]

Several dates in, she learned he'd fibbed -- he was actually a month shy of 23.
"I guess I worried she wouldn't call if I was 22," he explained. "It just sounds young when you are on the other side of 25."

Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:33 AM
horizontal rule
58

||

NMM to David Markson.

|>


Posted by: Tiny Hermaphrodite, Esq. | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 11:03 AM
horizontal rule
59

!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 11:07 AM
horizontal rule
60

Shit.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 11:07 AM
horizontal rule
61

Intro to David Markson


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 12:06 PM
horizontal rule
62

When I was little I believed quite firmly that Indian women were the most beautiful women on earth. I have no idea where this came from, but I was fixated on it. It certainly wasn't because I had much contact with Indians or Indian-Americans as a child. I also blamed my mother for not marrying the first man that asked her to, an Indian-American doctor. I thought life would have been so much better as the gorgeous half-Indian daughter of a doctor. (Why yes, how I assumed I'd still be me if I'd been born nearly a decade earlier and too different parents is a bit of a puzzle.)

/Weird tales from childhood.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 12:10 PM
horizontal rule
63

46: Fucking presidents obviously include JFK and Clinton, but I'm not sure which one completes the triumvirate.

Harding.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 12:33 PM
horizontal rule
64

46 and 63 are very unfair, even insulting, to Michelle Obama and Dick Cheney


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 1:04 PM
horizontal rule
65

she will give you some recipes

Surely she doesn't cook from recipes!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 1:06 PM
horizontal rule
66

Oh goodness gracious me.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:06 PM
horizontal rule
67

When I first saw the linked post in the OP linked elsewhere, I assumed it would be a thoughtful examination of some of the nuanced difficulties of interracial dating, in which the white woman author would consider and acknowledge her own self-analysis w/r/t possible fetishization of the "other," as well as complications that may arise from mutual prejudices on the part of family and friends. What if family on either side is affronted by a relationship that may symbolically point to a possible desire to break with their own culture? What if ignorance of cultural norms leads to a failure to comfortably participate in one another's lives? Does love, in fact, triumph over all? If one does find they are to some extent fetishizing the body of the other, is it OK if it is mutual? Is it something the couple can get past?

That might make an interesting yet still potentially offensive post. It would probably still be obnoxious. But I find it amazing that the author has this extraordinary level of squicky unexamined racism and classism (all Indians are beautiful brilliant genteel professional Ivy grads) to parade around in.

It reminds me most of a conversation I found myself in with one of my dad's octogenarian fishing buddies, in which the guy explained at length why a "squaw" makes the best wife. She never talks and she'll skin and cook whatever you kill.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:22 PM
horizontal rule
68

At least one person on Metafilter thought the author did it all deliberately, as sort of fake display of or satire on the unconscious racis and classism one might encounter abroad in the world. It certainly has the savor of the real thing, though.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:30 PM
horizontal rule
69

68: Oh, I absolutely thought it was a joke at first (they love to dance! so full of life!). But it really seems not to be.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:33 PM
horizontal rule
70

|| Oh hey look. An SAQ iPhone app. |>


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:38 PM
horizontal rule
71

My first thought upon finishing reading the post was that her vagina must taste like fresh peaches. I can think of no other reason why some guy would put up with wooing via phrasebook Hindi and shitty spicebox curry.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:40 PM
horizontal rule
72

71: See, it was stuff like that that make me think "Joke!" because, to quote GOB Bluth, come on! Food just like mom used to make! With curry powder from the Gas-n-Sip!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:43 PM
horizontal rule
73

to quote GOB Bluth, come on!

I loved that show.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:44 PM
horizontal rule
74

An ex of mine wooed a Hindu girl in a similar fashion. It's one of the reasons we stopped being friends. If I heard "Her brown skin next to my white skin! So beautiful!" one more time I was going to freak out. He did the Hindi phrasebook thing, the spicebox curry thing, the Bollywood thing... it was too sad.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:47 PM
horizontal rule
75

My first thought upon finishing reading the post was that her vagina must taste like fresh peaches. I can think of no other reason why some guy would put up with wooing via phrasebook Hindi and shitty spicebox curry.

Is the distinctive benefit here supposed to be that fresh peaches are only available during part of the year, while her vagina is available year-round? Because otherwise just being as good as fresh peaches probably wouldn't cut it.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:51 PM
horizontal rule
76

75: Exactly. Most other special wonderful flavors can be had, at least in some form along the same flavor trajectory, for a longer season. But a fresh ripe peach is in an entirely different world of sensation from a peach at any other time of year. Also, peaches and vaginas are often compared for their appearance, texture, and juiciness.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:56 PM
horizontal rule
77

"Her brown skin next to my white skin! So beautiful!"

He should stop cheating at arm wrestling.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 4:58 PM
horizontal rule
78

A vagina's texture is nothing like the sua peach's; that's insane.

Not even a vulva's texture is like a peach's!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:01 PM
horizontal rule
79

All similes suffer from a certain amount of misrepresentation, but "nothing"? As in, a vulva's texture is more like that of a gravel pit, or a bicycle chain?


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:20 PM
horizontal rule
80

The apparently infinite tiger traps of potential offense and denunciation make me glad that I am too self-centered to feign interest in other cultures for the sake of love stone fruit.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:24 PM
horizontal rule
81

Yes, I always just tell people right away when I think they have a shitty culture. It's for the best.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:26 PM
horizontal rule
82

No dear, I'm not in the mood either, just jonesing for some peaches. You don't mind, do you?


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:39 PM
horizontal rule
83

Obligatory.


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:40 PM
horizontal rule
84

||

Reasons I love PDBS, #4,116: The little Ruprechts' school requested that parents decorate cakes for a fundraiser. I thought I was being a little edgy with this entry. Turns out there were *four* oil-spill-themed cakes submitted.

|>


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:42 PM
horizontal rule
85

83: I've always liked that song. And peaches, of course.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 5:49 PM
horizontal rule
86

Obligatory.


Posted by: k-sky | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:15 PM
horizontal rule
87

All this talk of obligatory music reminds me of how glad I was when somebody explained that when the radio station has "Mandatory Metallica," the mandate is from the station owner to the disk jockey. No one is required to listen.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:19 PM
horizontal rule
88

I admit, I do fetishize the human body.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:22 PM
horizontal rule
89

Oh! TCM is now showing Old Yeller. They didn't even run a parental advisory at the start. Isn't that illegal?


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:24 PM
horizontal rule
90

88: I'm hoping you aren't using "fetish" in its original sense.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:30 PM
horizontal rule
91

84: How in must one be to get access to the flickr stream? I'm not really begging, just frustrated I've yet again clicked a link to something I can't see and gotten all OCD/antsy/completist about it.

But I don't think I was ever even offered the fruit basket, thank goodness, so maybe I'm not following protocol anyway. (And a better gift would be a reminder of how the fuck to go right to the end of the comments on an iPhone, which is a conversation I barely followed at the time but that my stupid iPad has made urgent.)


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:39 PM
horizontal rule
92

91: On the iPhone, if you click in the "Latest Comments" column right next to the username where it says "comments," it will take you directly to that comment. But, as far as I know, one is SOL if one would like quickly to get to the bottom of a thread that doesn't have a comment in the "Latest Comments" column. I would love to be wrong about this!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:42 PM
horizontal rule
93

90. Alive, alive ho.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:49 PM
horizontal rule
94

91: See here et seq.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 6:55 PM
horizontal rule
95

Otto, I love you!! Having a search feature is perfect for unfogged and elsewhere. Now I can take my nyquil and go to bed satisfied.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:11 PM
horizontal rule
96

when the radio station has "Mandatory Metallica," the mandate is from the station owner to the disk jockey. No one is required to listen

"Must-see tv", by contrast, means exactly what it says.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:24 PM
horizontal rule
97

You'll need a fruit basket, though. The management apologizes for the oversight.


Posted by: k-sky | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:26 PM
horizontal rule
98

91: Thorn, you need only email Armsmasher with a request to be added to the Flickr pool. It's not terribly selective, AFAICT. McMegan is a member, for example.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:27 PM
horizontal rule
99

Armsmasher manages the Flickr group. To join you have to add him as a contact, then he can invite you to the group.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:28 PM
horizontal rule
100

Dammit, K(obe!)necht.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:35 PM
horizontal rule
101

I would have thought the obligatory response to 79 would be: "Chestnuts."


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:42 PM
horizontal rule
102

74: the Hindi phrasebook thing, the spicebox curry thing, the Bollywood thing...

I have a fair amount of friends, and friends-of-friends, from India or of Indian ethnicity, and I cannot imagine a single one of them who would be vapid and clueless enough to fall for that kind of thing for even a minute. There was one girl in a Hindi film class, whom nobody could stand, who would maybe have been prey to such a strategy, but even she would have better taste than to fall for that, I would hope. She was a Bollywood true believer though, so maybe if you'd really done your Bollywood homework, you would have had an in. If you did try that, I think you would be shooting yourself in the foot if you couldn't name your favorite Raj Kapoor and Nargis movies.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:43 PM
horizontal rule
103

102: Because men are always rejecting women who want to sleep with them for inadequate reasons?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 7:53 PM
horizontal rule
104

102: I fear that this girl's attractions seemed to be limited to the loveliness of her brown skin against his white. Questions like "Is she smart? Do you like her?" went unanswered.

In related news, one of the most irritating things about the job I recently ended was Sir Mack-a-lot, the 50-something loser I worked with, getting busy with all the Chinese students by asking them, "Have you ever had bubble tea? It's amazing." Yes, I watched this work.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:06 PM
horizontal rule
105

Bubble tea is cheaper than etchings. Win.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:07 PM
horizontal rule
106

Yes, I watched this work.

[blink]

[blink]

God, people are confusing.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:14 PM
horizontal rule
107

Just think of AWB as a fan of extremely high def porn.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:17 PM
horizontal rule
108

Speaking of hott Indian women, have I ever mentioned.... Awww, to hell with it.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:21 PM
horizontal rule
109

Yes, yes you have.


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:24 PM
horizontal rule
110

An SAQ iPhone app

Société des alcools du Québec? That might come in handy the next time I'm in Montreal.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:46 PM
horizontal rule
111

Now that iPhones are cheap, I think my wife will get one. And then maybe I'll get her iPod Touch, which is fine because I don't like to talk to people or get e-mail when I'm not at a desk.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:48 PM
horizontal rule
112

83 & 86: Obligatory


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:52 PM
horizontal rule
113

||
Didn't McManus predict something quite similar to this?
|>


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:52 PM
horizontal rule
114

It sounds tiring, carrying a desk around just to feel more comfortable talking to people.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:53 PM
horizontal rule
115

For some reason, people complain less about the bill when I'm behind a desk.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:54 PM
horizontal rule
116

peaches and vaginas are often compared for their appearance, texture, and juiciness.

I really love your peaches, wanna shake your tree.


Posted by: OPINIONATED STEVE MILLER BAND | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:56 PM
horizontal rule
117

A duck carrying a desk walks into a bar.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 8:56 PM
horizontal rule
118

103: Well, but then it's not the lines that are getting them into the sack, but rather the external factor of hott woman showing interest.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:01 PM
horizontal rule
119

Bartender says: "We don't serve quackers here."

Duck says: "That's OK, I'm from Nebraska. And boy are my wings tired."


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:03 PM
horizontal rule
120

(Why yes, how I assumed I'd still be me if I'd been born nearly a decade earlier and too different parents is a bit of a puzzle.)

But you wouldn't have been you, you would've have been the perfect you! (I have entertained similar fantasies myself, on occasion, I am embarrassed to say.)

(In terms of pure beauty, don't Indians rank just below Brazilians and Iranians?)


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:10 PM
horizontal rule
121

(In terms of pure beauty, don't Indians rank just below Brazilians and Iranians?)

Not exactly on topic, but I once knew a man from Pakistan who said that men from his home country were very into Iranian women.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:12 PM
horizontal rule
122

120.last: It's Mexicans all the way down.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:13 PM
horizontal rule
123

It is objectively true that the relative hotness of a person is determined in large part by skin color, and that the continuum goes: white -> brown -> blue.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:15 PM
horizontal rule
124

Huh, I guess I didn't need to &gt those after all. Sweet!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:15 PM
horizontal rule
125

110: It has real time inventory for le saq le plus proche! Not that there are any very proche to either of us right now, but I'll be there in a few weeks.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:15 PM
horizontal rule
126

124: But it's more correct if you do.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:17 PM
horizontal rule
127

Nearly all black and brown skins are beautiful, but a beautiful white skin is rare.
-Mark Twain


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:20 PM
horizontal rule
128

It's Mexicans all the way down.

I was working with a (largely Latino) construction crew recently and I was amused/chagrined when I learned (to my ignorance) that the guy in charge was Iranian, not Latino.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:28 PM
horizontal rule
129
Posted by: | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:32 PM
horizontal rule
130

I would guess that many lines that seem easy to see through were seen through, but that they "worked" because the hearer was interested for other reasons, or maybe even found the very clumsiness charming.

[Not recommended, however: associating Taiwan immediately with spicy food.]


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:51 PM
horizontal rule
131

In the dark, all peaches are fresh.


Posted by: ben franklin | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 9:58 PM
horizontal rule
132

||

Graveyard of gladiators.

|>


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:13 PM
horizontal rule
133

132: Interesting, but there must have been plenty of other ways to die of a lion bite in York.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:22 PM
horizontal rule
134

132: Headless Romans Found In Topless Grave!

Except there are two very obvious skulls in the illustration for that article. Hmmm.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:27 PM
horizontal rule
135

And one nearly as obvious skull on a really bald guy.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:29 PM
horizontal rule
136

The skulls are still there, they're just not attached to the bodies.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:29 PM
horizontal rule
137

I'm thinking the bald guy's still is.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:30 PM
horizontal rule
138

Maybe it was a case of the Yorkshiremen sketch going too far.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:32 PM
horizontal rule
139

136: But the bodies aren't attached to the bodies. It's just jumbly piles of bones. You might as well say they're "ribless Romans" or "tibia-less Romans" then.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:34 PM
horizontal rule
140

139: There are probably marks on the bone that indicate the skull was disconnected prior to decomposition.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:36 PM
horizontal rule
141

139, 140: Yeah, presumably the skeletons are still largely articulated (judging from how the article keeps describing them as well-preserved), with the skulls associated but with clear cut marks showing decapitation. This stuff's pretty easy to see on the bones.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:38 PM
horizontal rule
142

I think that strains the meaning of "headless" quite a bit. Stupid copy desk and their sensationalist heds.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:40 PM
horizontal rule
143

In the picture, the skeleton on the left looks mostly articulated, while the one on the right is less so.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:40 PM
horizontal rule
144

Yeah, "headless" was probably not the most accurate term. I'm shocked to see this kind of sensationalism from the British press.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:41 PM
horizontal rule
145

I think that strains the meaning of "headless" quite a bit.

Evidence of death by decapitation strains the meaning of "headless"?


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:48 PM
horizontal rule
146

I'd say so.


Posted by: washington irving | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:53 PM
horizontal rule
147

This reminds me that I was talking to someone recently who seemed to think that archaeology and anthropology are completely distinct.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:54 PM
horizontal rule
148

It's not totally clear that the decapitation was actually the cause of death.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:55 PM
horizontal rule
149

(Yes, I'm aware of the divide between physical and cultural anthropology, but this seemed to be a different distinction.)


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:55 PM
horizontal rule
150

147: Was it a European?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:55 PM
horizontal rule
151

150: American. It wasn't a very long conversation, so I don't know what the basis of the distinction would have been, beyond saying they're different.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:56 PM
horizontal rule
152

Probably the person was just unaware of the relationship, but it's actually a distinctively American thing. In Europe they're generally considered totally separate disciplines, and archaeology is more closely associated with history.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 10:58 PM
horizontal rule
153

Ah, I didn't realize that, but I can see how that difference would have developed, historically. I was just thinking about in terms of how academic departments in the US seem to be organized (with varying ways of dealing with the cultural/physical split).


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 11:02 PM
horizontal rule
154

Traditionally, Americanist anthropology was divided into four "fields": physical, cultural, archaeology, and linguistics. In practice these actually have very little in common, but the way the discipline developed historically they ended up being grouped together. The four-field approach is moribund at best these days, but archaeology is still mostly in there.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 11:06 PM
horizontal rule
155

getting busy with all the Chinese students by asking them, "Have you ever had bubble tea? It's amazing." Yes, I watched this work.

Incomprehensible. There must be some other magnetic quality to this 50-something loser?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06- 6-10 11:28 PM
horizontal rule
156

155: Condescending, physically encroaching, stupid, fraudulent, needy... I can't figure out which of his qualities was even tolerable to people, but he seemed to score a LOT at work. I chalked it up to his extreme touchy-feely-ness and babytalking, which is how he interacts with all women. Add in pointed, head-lowered eye-contact, and you can sort of go from there, I guess. Made my fucking skin crawl.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 3:16 AM
horizontal rule
157

next time I see neil the ethical werewolf, I'm totally going to pretend to like hrithik roshan, even though I'm actually kind of meh, nice abs but whatever. then I'm going to get him to dance! a surprisingly easy task, since he actually does love to dance. it's part of the gracious, social creature he is.


Posted by: alameida | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 4:35 AM
horizontal rule
158

104: To be fair, bubble tea is amazing. My favourite cheapo Cantonese restaurant in London does a glorious watermelon bubble tea.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 7:37 AM
horizontal rule
159

I think I've mentioned before that I dated a Desi woman in high school who would have been severely beaten by her family if we'd been found out. My sister dated a Desi guy for about three years, a member of the same community, and it was no problem at all.

As to the beauty thing - Slightly unfamiliar is always sexier.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 7:52 AM
horizontal rule
160

145: Yeah, but, if someone's like "OMG, we found some skeletons" and you're like "Did they have heads or were they headless?" and they're like "Yes, we could tell they were headless because the decapitated skulls were right there." Then it seems to me that "headless" is perhaps not the best description of what you have found.

I'm still not really clear why cultural anthropology, sociology and cultural studies need to be separate disciplines. It seems like they should just be distinct methodologies within the same "Human Culture" rubric.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 7:52 AM
horizontal rule
161

155-156: all it really takes is total confidence in your shtick, whatever it is, and the guts to approach. So long as you're not too discriminating about the type of women you score with.

That's easier said than done, though, all self-criticism must be turned off.


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:16 AM
horizontal rule
162

161. People who behave like this with students don't have any self-criticism in the first place.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:21 AM
horizontal rule
163

My parents (read very old) just got back from India where my Dad's college roommate's youngest daughter just got married to an Indian fellow. I asked how such a thing was possible, seeing as she is about as shiksa as they come. My mom then related that he had a previous failed marriage, so as damaged goods he was free to marry whomever.


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 12:11 PM
horizontal rule
164

23
Undergrads look so young to me now. I'm not sure when this happened, but it was pretty abrupt, like a duck/rabbit gestalt shift.

For me it happened while I was still an undergrad, although I think I'm over it by now. I have one sibling, a sister who is three and a half years younger than me, so for most of my life she was the measure of what makes someone young - based on when our birthdays fall she was four years behind me in hitting puberty, learning to drive, learning to drink, etc., so until I graduated from high school anyone who was older than her was "close enough" to my age to empathize with and anyone younger than her was really young. Well, I took a year off between high school and college, so when I was a senior, most freshmen were only about three years younger than me. This caused a few weird moments when I would see or meet a cute girl only to be told her age or look her up and find that, ouch, she's even younger than my sister.

Re: Interracial dating, it's never come up. I can see the appeal - yes, Iranian/Palestinian/Indian celebrities really are hot - but I just don't happen to have met and dated any. I'm reminded of a George Carlin routine (I spent a little time trying to Google it before realizing that that's not smart to do at work), the non-scatological point of which was that it's hard enough finding someone you get along with and find attractive without adding bizarre, unique qualifications on top of that.


Posted by: Cyrus | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 12:49 PM
horizontal rule
165

As the female Indian half of an Indian/Caucasian-American couple, I will refrain from comment except to say that the soundtrack of Dil Se was not unhelpful when I was doing the wooing. But so was MJ, so eh, it's a wash.


Posted by: Ile | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 2:13 PM
horizontal rule
166

165: MJ isn't Persian, he's Parsi!


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 2:25 PM
horizontal rule
167

I was at an Indian wedding just yesterday, where I inexplicably failed to pick up one of the heirs to the Tata Group, despite being seated at the same table. Smart, profane, funny guy. Women's Studies major, among other degrees.

(I wasn't really trying to pick up the guy. I always intended to leave with the guy who brought me.)


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 4:32 PM
horizontal rule
168

Megan if you ever were a lady to begin with, Megan, be a lady tonight.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 4:52 PM
horizontal rule
169

||
Can anyone find my limerick about the centaur in the Attic? I would like to post it somewhere else but it seems to have completely disappeared.
||>


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 4:58 PM
horizontal rule
170

I always intended to leave with the guy who brought me.

The 'r' is what makes her a lady.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 4:58 PM
horizontal rule
171

I left the wedding no less a lady than I had been when I arrived.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 4:58 PM
horizontal rule
172

Every lady is a woman but not every woman is a lady. My Gramma told me that.


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:01 PM
horizontal rule
173

171: And the reception?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:04 PM
horizontal rule
174

Wonderful food, and children in bright colors running through.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:07 PM
horizontal rule
175

Cash bar?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:10 PM
horizontal rule
176

Absolutely not.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:18 PM
horizontal rule
177

Another point for Indians.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:19 PM
horizontal rule
178

They're a noble people.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:23 PM
horizontal rule
179
Posted by: | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:31 PM
horizontal rule
180

MJ is Parsi? MJ was Persian? No one told me!


Posted by: Ile | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 5:59 PM
horizontal rule
181

God I want those folks from that Freddy Mercury thread to show up here.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:21 PM
horizontal rule
182

167: Tata! Hooray!


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:25 PM
horizontal rule
183

182: Are you talking about the small cars?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:29 PM
horizontal rule
184

I guessed that a Mitford was some kind of English mitzvah. Not too far off, I suppose.

My 99-year-old house, and every place like it in the neighborhood I can think of, has ceiling fixtures in every room but the bath, all original wiring. Houses just a few years older often have their original gas plumbing (now out of service).


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:29 PM
horizontal rule
185

Oops.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:30 PM
horizontal rule
186

184 -- knob and tube?


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:33 PM
horizontal rule
187

OK, that goes to 184.2, but I guess it could also describe English mitzvahs.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:33 PM
horizontal rule
188

The problem with knob and tube wiring is that in cold weather, the knobs show through the plaster.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:52 PM
horizontal rule
189

180: It's an old inside joke around hereparts. See also here.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 6:52 PM
horizontal rule
190

169:
Maurice was a centaur, erratic,
On one point he was quite emphatic:
"Lakadaemonia's dreary,
"Of Corinths, I'm weary,
"I believe I'll just stay in the Attic!"


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 7:48 PM
horizontal rule
191

Every lady is a woman but not every woman is a lady. My Gramma told me that.

Did she tell you the one about who shaves the barber?


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:08 PM
horizontal rule
192

Thank you! I am not a very good searcher.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:08 PM
horizontal rule
193

That's what the FBI agent looking for the Unibomber said with the bomber's brother called him.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:15 PM
horizontal rule
194

That's what the FBI ATF agent officer looking for the Unibomber Unabomber said with when the bomber's brother called him.

AIEEEEEE HYPERCORRECTOSPEED


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:24 PM
horizontal rule
195

The Unabomber was a different guy.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:26 PM
horizontal rule
196

Man that brother was just turnin' dudes in left and right.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:26 PM
horizontal rule
197

On the veldt, you'd never report your brother because he had 50% of your genes and was the best at making sharp rocks.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:29 PM
horizontal rule
198

197: "On the veldt"

Googled that the other day and discovered there is a book titled On the Veldt. It is subtitled "A Plain Narrative of Service Afield in South Africa" (during the Boer War) and the author is somewhat disturbingly described as an Officer Commanding Tasmanian Imperial Bushmen.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:43 PM
horizontal rule
199

198: From the Preface:

I have no special leaning toward authorship. To me the work of writing has been in all respects a task; only in some few respects a pleasure. Now that the task is done I am anxious that the book shall be accepted -- if it is accepted -- simply as I proffer it.

Take the false modesty, and the pre-emptive resentment of imagined, or perhaps imaginary, readers/critics; substitute "blog" for "book;" and: what you have is an early version of the blogger's creed.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 8:59 PM
horizontal rule
200

198, 199: Last sentence.

For myself, I shall never regret my experiences in Wisconsin on the veldt.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 9:10 PM
horizontal rule
201

ME NEITHER.


Posted by: OPIONATED HOMO SAPIENS | Link to this comment | 06- 7-10 9:12 PM
horizontal rule
202

an Officer Commanding Tasmanian Imperial Bushmen.

Best regimental name ever.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 4:11 AM
horizontal rule
203

What do you mean we, whiteman?


Posted by: OPINIONATED IMPERIAL TASMANIAN BUSHMAN | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 11:13 AM
horizontal rule
204

Actually, the Imperial Tasmanian Bushmen were white. They weren't Bushmen in the !Kung San sense, just Australian blokes who rode around a lot in the bush. And they were, in fact, incredibly good soldiers.
http://www.bwm.org.au/site/Contingents.asp

TASMANIAN IMPERIAL BUSHMEN/1ST TASMANIAN IMPERIAL BUSHMEN

* Original strength: 122
* Subunits: one mounted rifle squadron only
* Decorations: two VCs (J. H. Bisdee and G. G. E. Wylly for rescuing comrades 1 September 1900), one CB (Wallack), two DSOs (Lewis, R. Perkins), three DCMs (R. Clark, F. A. Groom, A. Stocker); the most highly decorated Australian squadron in the war


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 11:23 AM
horizontal rule
205

By the time of the South African Wars, hadn't all the non-white Tasmanians been wiped out by the settlers? (Yes, I do mean wiped out. There are no full blooded Tasmanians left.)


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 12:08 PM
horizontal rule
206

Tell me about it.


Posted by: OPINIONATED "BREAKER" MORANT | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 12:20 PM
horizontal rule
207

205: According to Wikipedia, There, the very last of the full blooded Palawa [Tasmanian Aborigines - JPS], a woman called Trugernanner (often rendered as Truganini), died in 1876.

That was part of why I said "disturbingly" back in 197--because I'm a hunter-gatherist.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 1:22 PM
horizontal rule
208

206: I wonder if, in seventy years' time, we will be making films like that about the heroic soldiers who nobly tortured and killed Afghan POWs, and were unfairly prosecuted by evil liberals.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 1:48 PM
horizontal rule
209

"Breaker Lyndy"


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 06- 8-10 2:10 PM
horizontal rule
210

And your bonus question:

"This single celebrating the perpetrator of the single worst atrocity committed by US troops in Vietnam sold a million copies within four days of its release in April 1971".

"Uh, what was 'The Battle Hymn of Lieutenant Calley'?"

"That's right!"


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 06- 9-10 8:27 AM
horizontal rule
211

209: at least Lynndie England never killed anyone. Morant murdered several Boer POWs in cold blood.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 06-10-10 5:08 AM
horizontal rule