Re: Don't let anybody ever tell you cooking is easy

1

Ability or willingness? Anyone can enter into hot oil, all it takes is sufficient will. Haven't you learned anything from the neocons?


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 7:16 PM
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I can't decide if step four or step six is the best.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 7:21 PM
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3

Welcome to Brock's world.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 7:21 PM
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4

Pounding infants is something that even with sufficient will one might be too squicked out to do.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 7:21 PM
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If you can crush a child's testicles, what would stop you from pounding an infant? Haven't you learned anything from the neocons?


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 7:23 PM
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6

The sissies can always substitute baby pig, it won't be quite as sweet but it'll do.


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 7:30 PM
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"The power set pot. Enter into the hot oil. Streaky pork into place. To put tight enough."

It's date night!


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 7:32 PM
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8

The lamb shell might indeed be difficult to procure.


Posted by: Jimmy Pongo | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 8:32 PM
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9

Favorite line from recipe lately until I read this is from Patricia Marx's BP Cookbook thing in The New Yorker. "If prawns are extinct, use chicken drumettes."


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 8:52 PM
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I find the mixing of the English (or whatever Tbsp is considered) and Metric systems reprehensible. They should be consistent and stay with all measurements in units of tgwitwg.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 8:53 PM
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8: At $410, you'd certainly think so.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 9:02 PM
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And after you've gone to all the trouble of constructing a sugar bucket (caramelization?), you need to take just one tablespoon of it. Wasteful!


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 9:18 PM
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9: That article was the funniest thing I've read all year.

The number of crockery pieces flung into the ocean is minuscule compared with the number of molecules in the universe.


Posted by: Ace-K | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 10:07 PM
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I tried translating this recipe into Thai and back into English, but, as Translation Party has shown us in the past, this is not a very useful thing to do.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 10:38 PM
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OT: Don't even think of having loud sex in England Old story but it's showed up in the "Most popular stories now" BBC news list for some reason. So, a little warning memo to members of the unfoggetariat visiting Britain. (I'm assuming that our British contingent has already adapted their behaviour to this legal development)


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 06-29-10 11:23 PM
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doesn't 'most popular bbc stories' just have the same five things forever?

'bald chicken needs no plucking'
the story about the US Army's Gay Bomb
&c


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 12:39 AM
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I noticed that some of the words in the instructions are hyperlinked - hoping for a bit of clarification I clicked on "leaves" and got an ad for a Tree Removal Service.

This is not helpful.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 4:03 AM
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Some of his other recipes are grammatically correct (see Khanom Chan) and others just as rococo (see Lemon Grass Tea: "Fragrant screw pine leaves wash to clean maul split roasted sore enough to put boiled 5 minutes." -- you really have to do a number on those pine leaves!) I guess he is copying some out of a book. Needs to respect copyright, 'cause ones he's done himself are waaaaay more awesome.


Posted by: W. Breeze | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 5:31 AM
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Serve immediately with dip cup

I would not have guessed that Thailand's supply of American rednecks would be sufficient to provide readily available dip cups.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 6:48 AM
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OT, but I now know what happens vis-a-vis your feet and cleated shoes / pedals when you have a bike accident: what happens is that you come conveniently apart from your bicycle without any deliberate action on your part. In my case, at least. Luckily, quite a minor accident; only knocked my knee, and even better than that, the bike's paintwork remains unmarked and the wheels remain unwobbly.


Posted by: Charlie | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 6:56 AM
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I'm surprised no one has recognized this recipe as a somewhat clumsy homage to Dylan Thomas's finest work from his Asian period? I need to jog your memory?

Enter an Chamwg enough to put down grief,
Add spices to pound down the tender pork;
Savor again to leave the seasoned sweet.

I leave the remaining stanzas as a trivial exercise.


Posted by: llisa | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 7:22 AM
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20.
in my case, my shoes popped out of the cleats neatly and cleanly, thus allowing my bike to go under the car while i went up the hood and into the windshield.

i was completely unharmed, but the bike's axles were touching, when i pulled it out from underneath the car.


Posted by: cleek | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 12:55 PM
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23

Sing Chamwg, Chamwg, Chamwg hold a curry!


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 12:56 PM
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Erm, 23 didn't see 22; I didn't mean to be insensitive.


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 12:58 PM
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20. My daughter was not so fortunate. Riding her bike home from swim practice, her gym bag dangling from the handle bars decided to make an impromptu swing into the spokes of the front wheel. Which then acted as a brake, and stopped the forward momentum of the front part of the bike.The back part, not playing nicely kept going and attempted a ground level flip. She ended up with her foot through the spoke of the rear wheel, and the spokes acted like a cheese slicer on the skin of her heel. Lots of blood, natch. Luckily missed the Achilles tendon, just.


Posted by: Tasled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 1:04 PM
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Have I told my Rollerracer crash story? Probably, but here it is again!

When I was like five I used to ride my Rollerracer improperly, putting my knees on the seat and pushing off the ground behind me with my foot. One could attain. much higher speeds using this method of acceleration.

One morning, I was waiting for my mom and brother to come out so we could go to swim practice, so I was zipping along back-and-forth on the sidewalk out front—with a swim towel around my neck. The towel caught under the front wheels stopping the racer dead, while I kept going, landing teeth-first on the sidewalk.

I didn't go to swim practice for awhile after that.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 1:10 PM
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Riding her bike home from swim practice
I was waiting for my mom and brother to come out so we could go to swim practice

Swim practice should obviously be a regulated activity.


Posted by: OSHA Bureaucrat | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 1:20 PM
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It wasn't for a practice but one of my two worst bike accidents as a child was when I was biking shirtless to the pool and, at the bottom of a long hill, made a left onto a gravel road without first straightening out.
The other was when my front tire caught something and turned, neatly vaulting me headfirst onto the pavement, knocking my helmetless self out.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 1:26 PM
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My worst accident was running over my sister. She was fine, I ended up in the emergency room with a concussion.

(Rainy day, I was following her downhill, she skidded and went down with no real injury, I hit her and took off like Evel Kneivel.)

Newt just had his first wipeout on a bike this weekend, oddly also hitting his sister, who was also fine. He got away with a bit of road rash, nothing exciting.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 1:31 PM
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COOKING AIN'T EASY BUT IT'S NECESSARY


Posted by: OPINIONATED CHEF ICE CUBE | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 1:42 PM
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Make sure you master the basic techniques first, before you attempt pounding.


Posted by: YK | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 5:13 PM
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Never had any serious biking accidents. My worst crash was running head on into a moped on a bike path blind turn. One very crooked bike wheel and dead derailleur, but I got away with minor scrapes and bruises. Some pretty scary ski wipeouts but again, no real injuries. I did come very close to dropping hundreds of feet off a knife edge ridge, but I was grabbed. Worst injury - stepping on a nail and getting a rusty garden stake in my eye while 'fencing'.


Posted by: teraz kurwa my | Link to this comment | 06-30-10 6:16 PM
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