Re: And then the mother winks knowingly at the viewer.

1

Also it annoys me that daycare uses one that spritzes every few minutes in the baby room. I get it - they're changing poopy diapers all day long - but it still annoys me, chemical-wise.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:44 AM
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I especially find it strange that in air freshener commercials, there's usually a guy sitting in a chair and really irritated that the air freshener smell isn't pungent enough. Thank God they make them with built-in fans now!


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:46 AM
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Plug-ins outlast the smelly plumbers who will be invading your kitchen for a month, but - wink, wink - we know those smelly men will really be here for two months!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:51 AM
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The guy is either irritated or completely mystified by the glorious smell. "How on earth did my wife have time to clean the whole house and bake an apple pie? I only stepped out for a minute! Women!"


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:53 AM
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3: Since our sense of smell naturally adjusts to ambient odors (unless they are biologically wired as bad, like rotting flesh), it's only to be expected that people who routinely use air fresheners will eventually adapt and need ever stronger smells. I'm sure the air freshener industrial complex is well aware of this and exploits it to the fullest.

If I was setting out to become king of the stupid household products market I'd develop a plug-in air freshener that changed smells every half an hour or so. By rotating through a palette of half a dozen or more smells the customer would be constantly reminded of the efficacy of my product, while the competition's product would seem to lose potency quite quickly despite the fact that it's still pumping the same amount of crap into the air.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:59 AM
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By rotating through a palette of half a dozen or more smells

"Apple pie! Toothpaste! Sage! Watermelon! Fresh cut grass! New car smell! How the hell does my wife achieve so much in a three hour period?!"


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:02 AM
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"What's this apple and cinnamon smell coming from? Must be one of those fancy European candles, Mary."
"No, it's not, Nancy! Don't tell the other girls, but it's from Glade!"
"No fucking way!"


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:03 AM
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Fucking Nancy. Always knows the best shortcuts to femininity.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:05 AM
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I mean Mary. Duh. The smart one, not that whore Nancy.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:06 AM
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"Hey, who put rotting flesh in the rotation?"


Posted by: k-sky | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:07 AM
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I promised myself I'd leave my laptop behind today and go elsewhere to get work done. Apparently I'm having trouble getting out the door.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:08 AM
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"Hey, who put rotting flesh in the rotation?"

The fresh-cut grass contained a gopher.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:08 AM
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Do perfumes and colognes trigger the same scornful response? The commercials are terrible, but commercials for say ready-made kids' meals are also uniformly insulting. Talk to your cleaning implement commercials are also pretty strange, but there's not much to say about most household crap, so any 30-second plot is contrived and relies on assumed stereotypes.

I would vastly prefer an air freshener to like 99% of scented candles, personally. Getting comfortable with mess and stink is one extreme, OCD dusting and home-perfuming is the other. Finding low-expenditure ways to improve a local environment is a pretty basic human response.

Commercials aimed at kids are even stranger-- skittles and fruit-by-the-foot especially.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:10 AM
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10: you could create unconscious paranoia and xenophobia by interspersing them with subtly unAmerican smells (cardamom, garam masala, cilantro, bleu d'Auvergne, etc.) "There are foreigners in my house! Somewhere!"


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:11 AM
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Do perfumes and colognes trigger the same scornful response?

I'm used to them. I categorize them with make-up. Also a lot of people only use them on special occasions. Also they're not pretending to make you cleaner. So, no.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:15 AM
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11: Just use Glade Printer Ink and Frustration.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:20 AM
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When Jammies gets home, he'll inhale and think "Heebie was so productive on her papers! And yet she commented on Unfogged all day! How does she find the time?!"


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:23 AM
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Alright. Off to buy Glade Scented Productivity.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:23 AM
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12: Heebie's plan is to deliver the actual stuff in piles on the living room floor. Don't step in the Apple Pie!

If you freeze fresh cut grass does it retain its smell? If so there's a hella swipple business possibility in freezing fresh grass in the summer and delivering it to people in the winter. You'd need some sort of fancy defrosting bowl with a foreign sounding name, and some sort of hierarchy of grasses, preferably including something that's not sustainably harvested but smells really good so you get the tension between UMC performance and liberal values. It's not really swipple if there isn't a bit of guilt.

Mineshaft Holdings International LLC should add GrassCo to its portfolio.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:26 AM
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some sort of fancy defrosting bowl with a foreign sounding name

El Bongo de la Gravedad?


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:36 AM
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i get my smells the way any self-respecting dfh does: patchouli incense sticks from the head shop.

i think its a bad sign, in some way, that when i have been walking past the dumpsters in the alley on the way to the park, i have a brief 'hm, thats a nice fish sauce' reaction

and if i had to change diapers, i'd wear a activated carbon gas mask. a little febreeze would not be sufficient.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:42 AM
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oh, and those winky commercials for crest white paste i find very amusign. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKYPy8VVnaQ

its like very retro maybe.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:44 AM
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though now that i'm thinking abotu it, maybe wearing a gas mask while being around my spawn would less the impact of Return of the Jedi Spoiler.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:45 AM
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*lessen.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:45 AM
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Do perfumes and colognes trigger the same scornful response?

I was wondering about this, too. I hate spray air fresheners but like having candles or even (ex-roommate-hated-it-so-I-don't-oven-use-it-anymore) Nag Champa burning. I also really like it when people use some cologne or perfume or lotion. I'm attracted to people who smell artificially good, I guess.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:48 AM
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5 - there is one already that does that. I think (from vague memory of the ads) that it alternates between two.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:53 AM
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I'm pretty much the same as Stanley. I don't mind some candles and incenses and things, and some but by no means all colognes or perfumes. But I can't hack spray air fresheners much at all, although the aerosol type are still much better than plugins or those god-awful auto-squirting ones.



Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:06 AM
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so-I-don't-oven-use-it-anymore

Nice even/often compromise.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:10 AM
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26: Febreze Noticeables. There's earlier prior art, too.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:10 AM
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some but by no means all colognes or perfumes

To be sure, this seems to be too fine a needle for some to thread. I'd propose a rule that cologne/perfume should be detctable—yet not distracting—within private-conversation distances. I can't stand it when a group of people walks past followed by a ten-foot tailwind of CalvinKleinBurberryObsessionMuskLavender vapor. Ack.

Nice even/often compromise.

Yes. Let's call it that.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:15 AM
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I'd develop a plug-in air freshener that changed smells every half an hour or so

Every half an hour would get you increasingly overlaying scents, resulting in olfactory cacophony, since I think any given scent doesn't just whoosh itself away as soon as the air freshener is turned off, or put away (or changed).

The effect would be something like the horror an ex used to contrive by combining two of more of those christmas-tree shaped scented things people hang from their car's rear-view mirror. Cinnamon + vanilla! Pine + almond! Horrible. I have no idea why he did this, but I was perpetually removing them when entering his vehicle and secreting them in the glove compartment.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:24 AM
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Nothing could be more American than cilantro!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:24 AM
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13: Commercials aimed at kids are even stranger

Indeed, but it is particularly amusing (horrifying?) when kids see commercials not actually aimed at them, and PAY ATTENTION.

My six year old recently explained to a friend of mine: I saw on the teevee that there's a special wash that you can buy to help get rid of the all those little red spots on your face! If you use the special face wash, your skin will look lovely and smooth JUST LIKE MINE!

Um.


Posted by: Elizamuqin | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:27 AM
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Plug-ins outlast the smelly plumbers who will be invading your kitchen for a month, but - wink, wink - we know those smelly men will really be here for two months!

Two months? You should be so lucky.

and if i had to change diapers, i'd wear a activated carbon gas mask.

Diapers don't smell that bad until baby starts eating solid food. When the diet includes meat, though, it's Katy bar the door.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:30 AM
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33: I scorn all plastic surgery, etc., but if I could get back the skin of my child self, I'd consent to have my face peeled off in its entirety.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:53 AM
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Some of us smell like blueberry pie baking in a pine forest naturally, thank you very much.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:58 AM
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36: Augh. I really don't need to remember. I'd rather have basil + garlic, if we must.

I'll admit that whenever I spend time in the abode of someone who uses air fresheners, I tend to think: How pleasant this is! [visits the bathroom] Gee it smells nice in here! Also, look, there are no dustballs in the corners!

Insidious, these things are. My mom once grumbled that my house smelled of garlic, and, following her nose, declared that the cutting board was infused with the stuff, and I should really get rid of it, because it really is quite noticeable when one enters the kitchen, dear. I insist that no one else has ever noticed this, so there.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:20 AM
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37: Plus garlic smells nice. You should hang your cutting board from the rear view mirror of your car.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:28 AM
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we know those smelly men will really be here for two months

The Old Spice commercials are funny. Good job rebranding.


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:34 AM
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I don't understand the cat food commercials with the magical rainbow land and dancing turkeys and floaty cows. It looks like a commercial for a toy or a cereal that would convince children to nag their parents to buy the thing. Except it's for cat food. Are cats supposed to watch this commercial and then convince their owners to buy the food, or is the idea that cat owners are so stupid they should be treated like preschoolers? Or maybe just that Friskies is laced with hallucinogens for kitties.


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:41 AM
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I hate all scented candles, air fresheners, and almost all incense. I wish they wouldn't scent cleaning products. But between the nasty natural "almond" stench of Method floor cleaner (which rendered half my apartment uninhabitable for two days) and the focus-grouped inoffensive chemicalness of Lemon Pledge, Pledge wins. Best is just to sweep, or skip cleaning altogether.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:43 AM
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40: I think they're trying to make you think of your cat as a child. A child who will repay you for all that Fancy Feast with gratitude and unconditional love.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:45 AM
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38: When it wasn't banging me in the head, it might be interesting, I'll give you that. I could, if I were considering scenting my car, hang a bunch of drying basil.

The things people hang from their rear view mirrors kind of fascinate me, actually. Mardi Gras beads? CDs? A graduation tassel? A dreamcatcher? Miniature stuffed animals (ew)? I've mostly gone for hippie things like feathers or little brass bells -- I've given those away as gifts now -- or, yes, at one point a small dreamcatcher with beads that my grandmother made. Goofy, I know.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:48 AM
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41 and 42 are me, dammit. Remember personal info!


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:49 AM
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um... actually, the day care shouldn't be using one that spritzes into the air all the time, right?

for one thing, babies are pretty delicate & prone to big chemical reactions. for another, they have really sensitive senses of smell. so it might be olfactorily pretty unpleasant for them. why not ask for a change?

go ahead, be that parent! it's for a good cause.


Posted by: fizzle | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 11:52 AM
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32 gets it right. Coriander, on the other hand, would be frighteningly European.


Posted by: persistently visible | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:04 PM
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I'm with mcmc, basically. Scented candles are terrible, and I have more experience with them and hence a stronger negative reaction. Walking past Yankee Candle stores or display stands requires me to hold my breath as I pass. I go for unscented cleaning products when I can, and then wonder what the intended market of them is, since I suspect it't not merely those who don't like scents.


Posted by: Nathan Williams | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:04 PM
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40 is interesting, 42 is right, and 43 is something I look at also-- hanging cds with decorative image screenprinted on one side is common.

Last week, there was a 100+ degree day here. I biked. Every single totally buff jogger trailed Axe scent for 30 yards.

Perfume marketing changes too quickly, it's not all that common to catch the scent of an ex.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:08 PM
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Hypothesis: Most smells are either bad or food.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:20 PM
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I suppose it's possible that all these commercials are an elaborate euphemism for smells associated with crapping. In which case I can't really begrudge the consumers for their purchase, nor the advertisers for their circuitousness.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:25 PM
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Molly should hide the antifreeze.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:27 PM
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Hypothesis: Most smells are either bad or food.

Refutation: flowers, weather, clean people very close up.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:29 PM
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the cat food commercials with the magical rainbow land and dancing turkeys and floaty cows

Holy shit. That was one trippy ride for that cat.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:30 PM
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Cheese! Cabbage! Kittens!


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:31 PM
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Chris's refutation could go on. Natural smells: pine forests are actually pretty cool. As are moss-covered forests. Lilacs are heavenly.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:32 PM
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To the OP, Mrs y is allergic to air freshener. We once rented an apartment for a holiday where they'd put those things in the electric sockets before we arrived. I thought I was going to have to call an ambulance (not funny in Spanish, which I hardly speak). Does this ever occur to the people who pollute the world with air freshener? Does it fuck.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:33 PM
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Maybe we don't know what rob considers food. Like, he participates in teasing Brock, but secretly he discards his cheese to feast on kittens.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:34 PM
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No, if people are unaware that other people are allergic to things, the idea that other people are allergic to things doesn't occur to them.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:34 PM
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The sea.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:34 PM
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(not funny in Spanish)

I dunno; it's kind of funny in my imagination:

FRONT DESK: [answers phone] "¿Diga?"
CHRIS Y: "¡Nuestra habitación! ¡Es que huele a flores!"
FRONT DESK: "Vale. Venga. Ahora, ¿quién es Flores?"


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:38 PM
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50: Like the baby wipe commercials that show how effectively they clean up toothpaste.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:41 PM
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60. If there'd been a front desk I could have dealt with it, but it was a private flat - it would have taken ringing 112 (Euro equivalent to 911) and talking to a dispatcher. In the even I just got her out of there, opened the windows and disconnected all the smell machines. It was fine after a few hours.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:45 PM
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62: Well, that sounds more serious than I was imagining, and now I feel mildly bad for joking about it.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:47 PM
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Cheese! Cabbage! Kittens!

I hope to god you aren't claiming that kittens smell good. There is nothing more foul than the back half of a kitten.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:49 PM
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Fair enough. Just eat the front half.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:50 PM
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63. It was OK, really, more inconvenient than anything. I was a bit mindful that her mother had died less than a year before from breathing issues because the emergency services didn't get there in time (in that case she'd collapsed behind a locked door and they couldn't break in fast enough).


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:51 PM
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64: I don't remember that part of kittenhood. Funny how memory edits.

Cabbage (cooked), on the other hand. Not to mention the all-day cooking of salt cod.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:53 PM
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NMM American Splendor, guys.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 12:55 PM
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68: Rough times for Clevelanders.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 1:06 PM
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The perfumes marketed at twelve year old boys are especially evil. Strong is good. Right? I was so happy when it got used as a weapon and I got to confiscate it.


Posted by: Shadrack | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 1:44 PM
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I'm attracted to people who smell artificially goodartificially or naturally not like men,I guess.

Or were you not one of the people in the "I might jump the fence if guys didn't smell so guyish" thread?


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:24 PM
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68: aw darnit!

Dude wasn't very old.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:26 PM
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I spent years looking for a man who smelled like bacon, but turned up empty. Now I'm married to a woman, and I've never been happier!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:26 PM
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Or were you not one of the people in the "I might jump the fence if guys didn't smell so guyish" thread?

Huh? I'm not sure what that means. I like when people of any gender smell nice. My dad wears some weird Halston cologne but only on very special occasions, so I like that smell. My brother wears Burberry often but in low doses, so that reminds me of him. My mom wears two different scents fairly regularly, one for the spring/summer one for the fall/winter, again, in low doses.

I think my scent preferences are gender-neutral, if that's what you were getting at.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:33 PM
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Er, that's not right. I like scents that find their way to my nose from all the genders and for different reasons! And I also dislike scents from all the genders for different reasons!


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:36 PM
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50: Lighting a match is far more effective -- and doesn't result in the layered fragrance of say "Fresh Linen" smeared with "Crap."


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:37 PM
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||

Harvested one frame of honey and wax. Got three jars (four or five pounds?) of honey out of it. Maybe I should have considered the fact that I don't eat honey before I decided I wanted bees. Seems like it will be easy to give it away, though. I have nine more full frames left.

I'm more enthusiastic about the wax. I checked with SWPL, but it didn't tell me what to do. Do I make my own wicks, or buy some? I certainly won't add any scents to the wax, as it already smells like honey.

Aren't any of you guys keeping bees? All the faddish people are doing it.
|>


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:38 PM
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Aren't any of you guys keeping bees?

Eddie Izzard on keeping bees.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:41 PM
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||
If I really wanted to be authentic, I'd have to go get my own borax (for the wick) from Death Valley, wouldn't I? Anything else is commercial, and not home harvested.

|>


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:42 PM
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74: possible complete joke misfire. In any case, no provocation intended. There was an odd thread where a few people said, as I recall it, "the main reason I am wholly heterosexual is that the smell of men is repellant to me." I'm not posting this to Standpipe's other blog because I'm afraid it may have sounded like I was being a complete ass and I'm mostly trying to make clear that I was being at most a partial ass.


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:45 PM
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80: Oh. No worries at all. I'm probably just being dense and not remembering that thread. But you do smell funny.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:46 PM
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not home harvested.

You have a home in Death Valley?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:49 PM
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The perfumes marketed at twelve year old boys are especially evil.

i wonder what aspects of 12year old boys are popular around here.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:51 PM
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No, but I consider all of California my backyard. As I read more about making wicks, I realize that I should also glean the raw cotton bolls from harvested fields in the San Joaquin Valley, then spin them into cords. Keeping bees is hard.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:52 PM
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81: It isn't me. There's a room freshener right beside me.


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:55 PM
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Do these bees stay in the hive, or are they flying all around the neighborhood? If my neighbor started beekeeping, and this meant a large increase in the number of bees near me, things would get ugly pretty quick.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 4:55 PM
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I've been surprised at how few bees I see considering that I've put 60,000 of them in my tiny backyard. They fly towards and away from the hive in a narrow flight path (about two feet across). Outside the flight path, pretty much no bees. I see more in the front yard, but that's because I planted all bee-friendly flowers. (Native bees, too.)

(Oh, they're flying all around the neighborhood, gathering nectar to turn into honey for my friends.)


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:00 PM
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60,000

!!!


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:02 PM
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Do you watch the bees dance?


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:04 PM
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I've been surprised at how few bees I see considering that I've put 60,000 of them in my tiny backyard.

Was this the thread in which we were discussing the definition of a "sociopath"?

If I find out that the source of my ant problem is my neighbor's ant farm, I am going to be very mad.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:06 PM
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Halford hates pretty flowers and vegetables and whatever.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:09 PM
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Damn straight.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:09 PM
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If I find out that the source of my ant problem is my neighbor's ant farm, I am going to be very mad

Just leave me out of it.


Posted by: Uncle Milton | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:10 PM
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There's no worldwide shortage of ants though, Robert. We need more bees. Thank you Megan. Now post me some honey.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:10 PM
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Do you watch the bees dance?

Sometimes I try to tell them that I saw a nice pittosporum on the way to work, but I'm never sure if I've got the directions right.

If I find out that the source of my ant problem is my neighbor's ant farm, I am going to be very mad.

Well, how about you listen to my very loud music to calm yourself down? I'm sure you can hear it in your house across the street.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:10 PM
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This is the food thread now, right? Okay. I'm watching this video and wondering: do people normally rinse off meat this much? I haven't eaten or prepared meat in twelve years, but she just keeps rinsing it. Is that, like, a technique or some shit? I can't recall seeing people do it.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:11 PM
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Now post me some honey.

This is very likely, I now realize. I probably won't be chasing people with jars of it, the way you have to with summer squash. But I don't have my own uses for 60-100lbs of honey a year. I'm also realizing that beekeeping is going to mean keeping all the jars that cross my path and lots of scrubbing off labels.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:15 PM
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98

My plan is to raise endagered Siberian Tigers in the backyard and give them free range in the neighborhood. It will be totally sweet.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:18 PM
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Or maybe a Gator farm. What could go wrong?


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:20 PM
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I'm also realizing that beekeeping is going to mean keeping all the jars that cross my path and lots of scrubbing off labels.

Anyone who wants honey send Megan a jar and the appropriate postage for return. Problem solved.


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:21 PM
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I'd like to make labels, as well. In my fantasy world, where I am craft-y and diligent, I give away so many cute jars of honey* that people don't notice that I'm actually crappy about gift-giving** and never bring a bottle of wine, since I never drink wine and don't know the first thing about it.

*I'm hoarding the candles, though.
**Despite good intentions.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:26 PM
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98,99 I don't think that prospect evoked the right response from me, since I'd be fairly pleased about the addition of exotic animals to the neighborhood.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:28 PM
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I'd be fairly pleased about the addition of exotic animals to the neighborhood

Megan must be faster than Halford.


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:29 PM
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Megan, next Saturday I may be driving through Sacramento. You can give me some honey then.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:30 PM
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I'm actually crappy about gift-giving

I suspect most people would really appreciate free, Megan-harvested honey, but if you're really dedicated to maintaining your crappy-gift-giving reputation, you could label the jars "Bee Vomit" or something.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:30 PM
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F'real? If you stop by, I will give you a jar of honey. It is light colored, and has some floral taste that everyone comments on but we can't identify. Possibly because we don't know what most urban flowers taste like.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:35 PM
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some floral taste that everyone comments on but we can't identify

Air freshener.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:42 PM
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That's it!


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:44 PM
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80: The people saying that in that thread were heterosexual and were admitting that they just like women for smells of attraction. That they'd realized this. No harm, no foul, I don't think.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:49 PM
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Oy, crappy-gift-giver w-the good intentions right here. I have two, TWO gifts sitting at home that I really need to mail and keep failing to.

Megan -- if I ever find that mead recipe I had, you can send the honey to the Breaths and we can have Buck make us a mead.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:56 PM
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Dear Megan,
I'll send you fancy labels if you send me honey.
your friend,
Cecily


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:58 PM
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I've been a little paranoid about any potential long-distance effect on honey from a fairly robust patch of foxglove in my front garden (they're quite nice looking). But apparently, despite its overall toxicity, foxglove nectar is relatively OK. (But oleanders, rhododendrons, mountain laurels, sheep laurel, and azaleas can lead to toxic honey and I have 3 of those.)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:59 PM
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109- I don't mean to put togolosh on the spot, but I think it was just him saying that, IIRC.

Anyway, I got the reference, Smearcase. Maybe it's an outer-circle in-joke, thus beyond the ken of front-page posters.


Posted by: persistently visible | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 5:59 PM
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In proper time that ring-adorned
queen excellent in mind
brought the mead cup to Beowulf.
She greeted him, thanking
God that her wish had
been fulfilled, that finally
a hero had come who
she could count on
to stop Grendel's crimes.


Posted by: Beowulf | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:08 PM
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112: the trick is to keep the mountain laurel well saturated.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:09 PM
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113: Also Helpy-Chalk, as I recall.

So, we are supposed to be encouraging bees? We don't seem to have a shortage of them here. The flowers in the front of the house are awash in them -- a bit hazardous to walk out the front door.

The bee problem is very much larger-scale, no?


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:09 PM
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the way you have to with summer squash

Oh man, I am so glad that our CSA is done with the squash. I like squash as much as the next guy, but enough is enough.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:09 PM
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Dear Cecily,

That is a very tempting offer. Tell me, were you thinking of a cutesy bee theme, perhaps including a pun or two?

Yours,

Megan


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:13 PM
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Dear Megan,
I'll send you a whole box full of empty glass jars with lids if you send me honey.
your friend,
Molly


Posted by: Molly | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:14 PM
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Dear Molly,

I can see that I am going to have to make a list for the honey, and your name shall go right near the top.

Taking notes,

Megan


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:15 PM
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118: Whatever you want, baby. You want cutesy bees and puns? I'll make them. You prefer dense prose and threatening black-and-white images? I'll do my best.


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:16 PM
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Call it "Halford Honey" and put an ax murderer on the label.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:17 PM
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Call it Tom Swifty's Honey, since EM buzzed in first, he said sweetly.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:22 PM
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(you guys! ixnay on the unspay or Megan might refuse to give me the honey!)

Megan, I swear, puns only if you want them.


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:29 PM
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No puns! I was testing you. Which of course you passed brilliantly.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:50 PM
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"Punny Honey" would actually contain no puns and thus be a pun-snubbing name.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:56 PM
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At one point, a boyfriend's grandfather was written up in his local paper for his bee-keeping. The headline was, (of course?) "To Bee Or Not To Bee!" The grandfather really, really loved the headline until I kind of loved it too, just because it was so great to watch him shake his head and chuckle all over again.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 6:59 PM
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It'd be sweet to be like that guy. People would swarm you, asking for favors. You'd be queen for a day! It'd really take the sting out of the hives you've no doubt gotten from this comment.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 7:01 PM
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I've got a compound vision for a really great pun.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 7:04 PM
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My friend who took up beekeeping when I did (and is a million times more in love with it) has embraced bee kitsch, bringing bee-themed knickknacks into her home. I thought the increased likelihood of receiving bee-themed kitsch was one of the great perils of the endeavor, but she is not afraid. Nay, she walks straight into the heart of the flame.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 7:05 PM
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ACH, TURNED OUT THA WAG 'ELD ANTS.


Posted by: OPINIONATED COMICAL SCOTSMAN | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 7:06 PM
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101: I never drink wine

I'VE HEARD THAT BEFORE!


Posted by: OPINIONATED JONATHAN HARKER | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 7:11 PM
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With each delicious spoonful of honey, you are tasting the pain of Megan's insect-plague suffering neighbors. I hope you are all proud of yourself. Also the honey probably has poison-flower problems. Fortunately, when you are all gone I can rule Unfogged.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 7:55 PM
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If you can't drink all the mead, i bet mead vinegar would be a great gift for the person who has everything, and also 1-up your swpl friends.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:02 PM
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Di is clearly right that when you want to get rid of a smell you want to burn it up, not cover it up. Megan's candles in bathrooms everywhere! No, wait.

Same goes for people, basically. You want their natural underlying scent to be appealing, and if they occasionally add something subtle and artificial on top, so be it.

Now post me some honey.

International English fail! I read this first in the sense of "post a comment" and only then remembered you're British.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:04 PM
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bees or chickens or rabbit or whatever make me think suburbs wouldn't be quite so bad; if i had to be in on its an alternative to salt/gravel/zen garden.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:05 PM
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133: Plague is yellow jackets. Honeybees sting sweetly on those rare occasions when they sting at all.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:06 PM
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And i will admit the superiority of honey to sugar in nutritional interventions, inc. labrats and Man, is one of the more vexing things i have encountered.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:07 PM
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||So, uh, anyone know how to find the surface area of a pyramid with a parallelagram base? We know the dimensions of the parallelogram and of one triangle side. Yeah, that's right. I'm stumped by 7th grade math. |>


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:21 PM
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139: The area of a parallelogram is base times height, where the height needs to be measured perpendicular to the base. The area of a triangle is 1/2 base times height. Then just add them all up. I'm not sure what "one triangle side" means; it's not clear if you know the heights of all the triangular faces? I'm not sure how to give more details if you can't post a picture or something.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:27 PM
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1/2 base * height for each triangle,
base * height for the parallelogram.
Make a right triangle sides adj,opp,hyp, the angle is arctan (a/o).


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:27 PM
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By the way, the reason the area of a parallelogram is base times height is that it's the same as a rectangle: Cavalieri's principle tells you that you can just take a bunch of slices through it, scoot them all over to go directly on top of each other, and make a rectangle out of it.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:33 PM
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Another way to see that is to chop a right triangle off one end and move it over to other end to make a rectangle.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:37 PM
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DOWN WITH THOSE WHO PROFIT FROM THE FORCED LABOR OF SOCIAL INCEST!


Posted by: OPINIONATED LAS VEGAN | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:41 PM
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Thanks. Don't know the angles of anything. Just the length and width of the base and the sides of one triangle. Maybe it's a poorly drawn problem. Oh well, I shouldn't be encouraging her to do math anyway.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 8:56 PM
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What are the numbers you know?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:02 PM
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Is the triangle you have dimensions for isosceles? If it's seventh grade math, I'd assume all the triangles have sides of the same length.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:06 PM
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133 and before: But honey bee hives don't generally lead to an increased number of stings in the surrounding area, Halford. Plus, there are probably several natural hives in your neighborhood without you even being aware of it.

My step-uncle (ok, he's actually like a second cousin or something but we call him uncle) is a professional bee-keeper in the desert outside of San Diego. Best stuff ever.

I recently bought some local honey made by bees feeding off yellow star thistle. There were many bee puns on the label about how tough and hardy an insect had to be in order to make use of that plague plant.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:06 PM
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What are the numbers you know?

Oh gosh, well, let me see.

One.

Two.

Three.

Oh, uh, pi is in there.

Four.

Oh shoot I forgot zero.

Um, five.

Oh gosh, and the negative numbers. Negative one, definitely.

Uh, man. This is tough. Seven.

Oh! A hundred!

Hm.

Is L a number?

No, I guess not.

One? I think I already said that.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:09 PM
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If you're not explicitly told that the base is not a rectangle, assume it's a rectangle. Then to get the triangle, drop a perpendicular along the plane of the triangle to the base. That bisects the triangle base. Now you have a right triangle with known adjacent side and opposite, included angle = arctan (o/a).

It's summer, are you doing this for fun?


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:09 PM
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||

NMM to Tuli Kupferberg.

|>


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:10 PM
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147: Mr. Blandings builds a Bayesian Hypothesis.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:10 PM
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What if Di Kotimy told you that the pyramid was made on Tuesday?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:10 PM
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If it's seventh grade math, I'd assume all the triangles have sides of the same length.

This could be true of the most symmetric possible pyramid you can build over a parallelogram. (Note that the parallelogram's sides are not all equal, so if they are e.g. A and B and the one triangle that is given has sides (B, C, D), then the neighboring triangles will have sides (A, D, C).)

It's possible to find the area of a triangle given its three sides using Heron's formula, but deriving this formula using only seventh-grade math [which I assume means no trig] is a bit difficult.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:16 PM
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151, 153: Tuesday Nothing.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:18 PM
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153: But was it built using slave labor?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:18 PM
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154.last: haven't seventh graders had the pythagorean theorem?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:20 PM
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156: If the base isn't square, it was probably made in Detroit, so the surface area is pretty big.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:21 PM
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157: The pyramids pre-date Pythagoras, silly.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:21 PM
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Jesus Christ. Bees and Math, two of my least favorite things. This thread is my nightmare.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:23 PM
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154: But the truly most symmetric pyramid would be composed of triangles with sides of (A, C, C) and (B, C, C), in which case it's not so tough.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:24 PM
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I'm not sure what "one triangle side" means; it's not clear if you know the heights of all the triangular faces?

It means they know the lengths of two of the vertically-rising edges but not the height of the pyramid.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:24 PM
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157: OK, so maybe not difficult. Tedious, at least.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:25 PM
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Never mind. I blame the bees.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:26 PM
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161: That's geometrically impossible, I think, unless A = B. In general, a pyramid over a parallelogram has four completely different triangular faces. Symmetry can at best get you two pairs of congruent faces.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:27 PM
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165: unless the parallelogram is a square.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:28 PM
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unless A = B.

A = A, essear. Jesus Christ.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:28 PM
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Which is to say, A=B.

Hi!

Can I tell you some of the numbers I know?

Nine!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:28 PM
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A = A... Jesus Christ.

This is important! This means something!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:29 PM
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168: nevertheless, it is misleading to say that "symmetry can at best get you two pairs of congruent faces".


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:29 PM
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170: Fair enough, Mr. Pedant. The symmetry of a general parallelogram can at best get you two pairs of congruent faces. The symmetry of special, unusually symmetric parallelograms can do better.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:31 PM
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151: An excuse to link to Jeffrey Lewis from a couple of years back. (Kupferberg has several cameos.)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:32 PM
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It's a summer "bridge" class for the kids moving into the advanced math course next year in middle school. The dimensions given, I can figure the area of one face and the base. Now it's kind of bugging me, and she has long since moved on to the internet...


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:33 PM
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My parallelogram is unusually symmetric ... laydeez.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:33 PM
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Sometimes, when a student has a problem, she thinks, "I know, I'll use the internet". Now she has entered a death-spiral of procrastination from which she will never recover.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:34 PM
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173: If you can post a scanned or photographed image of the problem somewhere, I'm sure the hivemind can produce an answer and a good explanation of it. (I only mention the idea because people sometimes forget how handy digital cameras are for this sort of thing.)


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:38 PM
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Also the honey probably has poison-flower problems.

Naw, we don't have those big stands of oleander up here; they can't take our Arctic winters more than the occasional frost. No foxglove that I've seen. Nope, the honey is spiced only by the misery of my neighbors, and oh! what a sweet nectar results.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:42 PM
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I'm just glad I slipped 164 in before 165. It's actually not so much the bees, I think, as the sazeracs. Also, the fact that the bar I'm currently sitting at is slowly rotating may be messing with my geometry.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:46 PM
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Mmm, sazeracs.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:47 PM
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175: Indeed. Though she started on some math page, she is now on to "Stardoll" (some fashion/interior decorating thing). And that only after spending some time on a site involving a song with lyrics that are predominantly "llama llama duck."

177: I'd have to go downstairs and get a digital camera and laptop for that.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:48 PM
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180.last: You live above an all-night electronics store? Sweet.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:49 PM
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Er, 177 s/b 176. I'm struggling with numbers tonight.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:50 PM
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... and now I'm watching the "llama llama duck" song.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 9:54 PM
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Yeah, uh, sorry about that...


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:01 PM
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151: One more, "CIA Man" updated and original.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:14 PM
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Is L a number?

Know what comes after XLIX? You, getting off my lawn.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 07-12-10 10:27 PM
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180, 183 - I'm sure you've seen "Sawyer, Sawyer, Jack" too.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:37 AM
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151. Damn, I'm so old that upsets me a lot.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 2:47 AM
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when you want to get rid of a smell you want to burn it up, not cover it up. [...] Same goes for people, basically.

That's just making me laugh so much, though I know it's not what Witt meant exactly.

Megan,
I planted three bee balm plants in the front yard this weekend. We still get good numbers of bees, and the dog is pretty good about not eating them. Oh, and what I was actually going to say is that I start physical therapy tomorrow and will soon have an actual exercise plan and whatnot. I'm not sure why I didn't make myself do that sooner, but it's good news!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 8:23 AM
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Oooo! Starting up a new regime? I hope it feels great, and I hope your body loves it.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 8:30 AM
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190: My body hates today with the rainy weather making my arm seize up, so I'm looking forward to any positive change that doesn't include a lot of muscle relaxants, which feel great but leave me helplessly dopey.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 8:43 AM
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A good exercise program should bring positive change.

Here goes. I'm suiting up so I can take out a second frame, so I can have neB's honey ready by Saturday. I'll let you know in half an hour if I get stung to death.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:00 AM
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|So, uh, anyone know how to find the surface area of a pyramid with a parallelagram base? We know the dimensions of the parallelogram and of one triangle side. Yeah, that's right. I'm stumped by 7th grade math.

I don't think you've got enough information to determine the surface area. Call the base ABCD and the apex E. If all you've got are AB, BC, CD, DA, AE and BE, you don't have enough information to deduce CE and DE, which you need to work out the areas of triangles BCE, CDE and DAE, and thus the total surface area of the pyramid.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:04 AM
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192: neB -- Bring her clean jars. You must have some in your recycling, or you can find some. She's going to be jarring a lot of honey. Any size -- little ones are good for gifts, big ones for storage.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:06 AM
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Well, I don't have to jar all the honey at once. After this frame is done, I can let the other ones stay in hive for a while, until jars accumulate. I hadn't realized that beekeeping was going to include jar management.

Also, frame extracted. A couple fatalities, but neither of those mine.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:15 AM
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I'm projecting from Buck's beermaking experience, but I'd say that you're going to need a jar system. You could just buy halfpint canning jars, but that seems out of character.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:21 AM
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First the Olivia Munn thing, now Megan's pilferage. It's hard out there for a Bee.


Posted by: Samantha Bee | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:21 AM
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Or, of course, you could become a potter as well, and handmake little earthenware crocks to be closed with big corks.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:22 AM
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I'm appreciating specialization in a whole new way. Also, industrial logistics and goods management.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:34 AM
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Kobee!


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:37 AM
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Is there actually a pie which is Honey Pie? Or is it just a term of endearment? It sounds like it would make my teeth hurt.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:40 AM
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You could probably substitute it in custards? Honey-Lemon Meringue? Although I have the impression that honey's hard to bake with because it's non-standard, in that the water content is all over the place.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:45 AM
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Don't bring honeybunch and sugartits to Heebie's next pot luck.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:46 AM
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When my parents made strawberry jam they always sealed the jar by pouring melted wax directly onto the top of the still-warm jam. It forms an airtight seal and doesn't contaminate the jam. I don't know if it would work for honey, but since wax is what the bees use for storage anyway it ought to.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:48 AM
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I have this vague impression that you really don't need to seal honey, because it's naturally antibacterial. Just a clean screw-top should work.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:49 AM
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Yeah, that's my understanding, too. My Dad did very complicated boiling the jars and lids, and handling everything with recently boiled tongs. But I think honey doesn't require that. If I'm reusing jars, it maybe wouldn't be a bad idea to boil them at some point (although not immediately before because if there's any water in the jar, the honey will crystallize around it).

Jar management is an additional chore! An unexpected one!

(Off to a meeting.)


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:55 AM
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I've had it substituted in treacle tarts. Seemed OK - too sweet for me, but most things are.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 9:56 AM
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If I'm reusing jars, it maybe wouldn't be a bad idea to boil them

On the other hand, honey-flavored mayonnaise: have you ever had it? Neither have I. Maybe it's awesome.

When I think honey and desert, it's baklava, baklava, baklava, all the way down. Oh, yum.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:11 AM
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205,206: Now that I think about it, you are correct. IIRC, one of the ways bodies were preserved for transport in ancient times was by immersion in honey. Not that I'm trying to give you any ideas, Megan.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:12 AM
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201: Apparently, honey pie does exist.

http://www.cooksrecipes.com/pie/honey_pie_recipe.html


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:15 AM
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honey and desert

Let's all pretend that was an intentional misspelling.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:15 AM
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sample honey label


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:16 AM
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or here, I forgot about the unfogged pool being limited-access.


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:23 AM
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212/213: Ooh, I like that it's both menacing and vaguely rockabilly or something. Yum!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:29 AM
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211: no, he means "when he thinks about honey and things he deserves to have".


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:34 AM
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I never drink wine and don't know the first thing about it

Easy! Swap some of your honey for Jesus' wine. (Jesus McQueen, that is; drinking that other guy's blood seems unhygenic.)


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:40 AM
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I'm appreciating specialization in a whole new way. Also, industrial logistics and goods management.

TOLD YOU SO!


Posted by: OPINIONATED FREDERICK TAYLOR | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 10:46 AM
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You remembered my barn!

I'm afraid I don't have the taste buds to appreciate any wine (as in, it all tastes horrible to me, every single time). Trying additional wines (even good ones) isn't going to change that.

Baklava seems do-able, and straightforward if I buy the phyllo dough. But if I've never craved it before, should I make it just to use honey?


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 11:41 AM
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It looks a little bit like a captcha, though.


Posted by: mealworm | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 11:51 AM
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Not really. It's wonderful if you like honey, but it's very much like eating honey with a spoon (and crunchy pastry, but you've got a mouthful of honey). Again, if you liked honey, there's nothing better than Greek yogurt drizzled with honey (and some chopped, toasted nuts if you've got them) but not if you don't like honey.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 11:51 AM
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I like honey, but it is too sweet for me to use it in the quantities I'm facing. This is a pretty trivial problem to have, though, as the harvests are spoken for as soon as I mention them.

I bet a honey doughnut would be good, since you would be combining sweetness with some balancing fat.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 11:56 AM
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Still, if 'too sweet' is a category for you, baklava is too sweet. Try the Greek yogurt thing, though -- the creamy sourness is perfect with honey.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 11:59 AM
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187: Note to self -- "Google first before telling Rory to look for something mentioned on Unfogged." Oops. Thanks Asilon!

193: Thanks, Ajay, for actually expressing that in coherent language. And confirming that it really was insolvable as presented.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:00 PM
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Will do. I like yogurts with a raw sugar, sometimes, so I imagine I'd like them with honey.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:02 PM
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218.2: The wine isn't for you to drink; it's for you to take to dinner parties so that you're not a lazy, thoughtless guest.

I wonder how different mead and tej are.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:29 PM
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Dear Megan,
I'm sorry.
your friend (I hope),
Cecily


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:31 PM
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Dear Cecily,

That's very funny; I like that they are strategizing. I haven't noticed that they have any priorities that come before honey, so I wonder what Plan A is about.

Always and ever,
Megan


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:37 PM
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Cecily is Piers Anthony?


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:37 PM
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I wonder what Plan A is about

The same thing it always is, Pinky. To take over the world.


Posted by: The Brain | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 12:53 PM
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228: Would I be able to tell?


Posted by: E. Messily | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 2:22 PM
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Do you think Native Americans might've used honey as a contraceptive?
The hoohole is killing me here.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 3:05 PM
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Maybe your hoohole is killing you because you were using honey as a contraceptive. You are probably allergic.


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 4:16 PM
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Low hanging fruit is delicious with honey.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-13-10 5:50 PM
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