Re: The kids are almorons.

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OMMMM OOMMMM OOOOMMMM


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:09 PM
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The Camaro School District, on the other hand, is totally cool with rocking out.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:11 PM
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There's a lot of nonsense to the hysteria, but actual binaural beats per se are very interesting, and it certainly does seem like they can help induce altered states of consciousness (but more on the level of, say, jogging or medidation than, say, heroin). In concepy they're somewhat similar to Burroughs's Dreamachine which, if you've ever experienced one in person, is genuinely kind of surprisingly altering.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:15 PM
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"Medidation"?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:15 PM
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3: So, I can panic, but only in a hypothetical way?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:16 PM
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Is this high enhanced by smoking banana peels?

Is it possible that the real dummies are the adults?


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:17 PM
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NPR featured a researcher debunking the hype recently. It's still interesting stuff, per 3.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:18 PM
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5: you can panic about as much as you would if all of a sudden tons of kids took up buddhist meditation. So it depends, I guess.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:18 PM
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re: 8

I'm imagining a thriving black market.

"Pssst, over here ... wanna buy a mantra?"
"..."
"Genuine vajrayana, none of your cheap Chinese cha'an knock-offs."


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:22 PM
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8: Right. I'll stock-up on nonperishable food and toilet paper, but I won't buy ammo.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:24 PM
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I'm trying to figure out what the panicking is about, and the only thing I can come up with is that parents' greatest fear is that their kids might experience pleasure and not get sick from it or have any consequences at all...?


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:29 PM
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That seems to be many parents' attitude about many things their kids get up to, yes.


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:38 PM
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The 20Hz sample on the page Sifu linked to made me grin like an idiot. It's totally drugs.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:48 PM
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have any consequences at all

I have to imagine that's the worry--i.e., I doubt they are there are no negative consequences at all. Potential for addiction? Potential consequences for brain chemistry? Potential to become a "gateway drug"? One more useless and unproductive thing to suck up countless hours of time?


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:49 PM
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I just beat the crap out of some guy to get money for more binaural beats.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:50 PM
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14 s/b "I doubt the people who are worried would agree there are no negative consequences".


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:50 PM
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Potential to become a "gateway drug"?

A gateway to KALEIDOSCOPE USE OMG


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:53 PM
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Is there an underwater strain? Hyrophonic?


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:54 PM
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The 20Hz sample on the page Sifu linked to made me grin like an idiot.

Either Standpipe posted this on the wrong blog or else this is just like the way pot doesn't get me high.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:55 PM
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Potential consequences for brain chemistry?

Apparently, if you listen to a particular beat frequency long enough over time, you can start to hear two distinct tones instead of one pulsing tone. This tolerance effect induces people to listen to harder and harder beats, until they become helpless imbeciles uttering "woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo" all the time.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 1:58 PM
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Until they become helpless imbeciles uttering "woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo" all the time.

And this would make them different than ordinary teenagers how?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:01 PM
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Less masturbation.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:04 PM
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woo-woo-masturbate-woo?


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:06 PM
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I tried out a Hemi-Sync machine way back at the dawn of time. It was underwhelming to say the least, but there was most certainly something going on. Not anything particularly interesting, mind you, just a sort of quasi-hypnotic effect.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:08 PM
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Hey, druglatedly: has anyone tried salvia? I had a passing fancy about maybe trying it in its last legal days in Virginia, but then it got made illegal (and thus less readily available).


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:14 PM
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have any consequences at all

To follow on to 14: also, this is Oklahoma, which means a lot of these parents (and school administrators, who unless I'm misreading are really source of the worry) probably believe in demonic forces, and worry that music like this is simply evil, and that listening to it is a bridge to satanism. Lucifer was the angel of music, as you probably know. Anything vaguely hypnotic tends to carry these concerns.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:15 PM
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I doubt the people who are worried would agree there are no negative consequences

Aside from the 'pleasure without consequence = bad' crowd there are probably whackjob fundies who think it opens their children up to possession by nearby evil spirits and whatnot. Anything that separates their child's experience from their own is considered a hostile act and they are perfectly happy to manufacture bullshit reasons why.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:18 PM
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As long as the effect is to drive down the price of weed.


Posted by: Middle Aged Man | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:18 PM
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this is Oklahoma, which means a lot of these parents … probably believe in demonic forces

They're just doing their part to re-enchant the world. Modernity's such a drag, you know?


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:20 PM
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26: Have you heard "Surrey with the fringe on top." People from Oklahoma are right to be worried about music.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:21 PM
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30: Even worse is the Bollywood version: "Curry with a Cringe on Top."


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:24 PM
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Well, fuck. It's a sad day when the flaky techno-pagan gets Devil-pwned.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:28 PM
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30: shut up i love that song.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:31 PM
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Somewhere I hope there is a fey little thing pounding Cole Porter tracks, hoping it will add up to one big martini. Which, in fact, it does.


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:31 PM
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I just listened to the 20hz one for a while. It kinda made me sick to my stomach, but no other effect. I suspect these are not designed for the half deaf.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:33 PM
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If my teenager started to listen to a droning noise in order to get "high," I would be mad, but only because it would be evidence that my teenager was a total fucking idiot.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:35 PM
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If my teenager started to listen to a droning noise in order to get "high," I would be mad, but only because it would be evidence that my teenager was a total fucking idiot I'd have to end my around-the-world traveling and retract my blog posts humbly proclaiming my teenager to be a prodigy.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:51 PM
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Heh. You know, I sort of think I should be feeling bad about making fun of her. But I just can't.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 2:55 PM
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LB, the important question is: WWHLMD?


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:04 PM
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HLM

Hitler-Lenin-Mao? That's a pretty low bar to clear.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:12 PM
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Are you a practicing pagan, Robust?


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:15 PM
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Hey, druglatedly: has anyone tried salvia?

Yes, I have. It will get you high as a fucking kite, but it really isn't a recreational drug. It's super-weird and pretty interesting, but it isn't really fun per se.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:16 PM
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33: Sorry. My sister was the girl with the goofy laugh in a high school production.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:19 PM
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43: I'm sort of kidding; it's so terrible it's my go-to musical song for explaining the bizarre appeal of musicals to non-theater people


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:24 PM
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My sister was the girl with the goofy laugh in a high school production

The girl who cain't say no?


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:26 PM
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No, the other goofy laughing one. She had a minor role.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:27 PM
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I was thinking more local -- H.L. Mencken -- but yours works, too.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:29 PM
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I had forgotten how sex positive feminist the lyrics are:

It ain't so much a question of not knowing what to do.
I knowed whut's right and wrong since I been ten.
I heared a lot of stories and I reckon they are true
About how girls're put upon by men.
I know I mustn't fall into the pit,
But when I'm with a feller, I fergit!
I'm jist a girl who cain't say no,
I'm in a turrible fix I always say "come on, le's go"
Jist when I orta say nix!
When a person tries to kiss a girl,
I know she orta give his face a smack.
But as soon as someone kisses me,
I somehow, sorta, wanta kiss him back!
I'm jist a fool when lights are low
I cain't be prissy and quaint
I ain't the type that can faint
How c'n I be whut I ain't?
I cain't say no!
Whut you goin' to do when a feller gits flirty, and starts to talk purty?
Whut you goin' to do?
S'posin' 'at he says 'at yer lips're like cherries, er roses, er berries?
Whut you goin' to do?
S'posin' 'at he says 'at you're sweeter 'n cream,
And he's gotta have cream er die?
Whut you goin' to do when he talks that way,
Spit in his eye?
I'm jist a girl who cain't say no,
Cain't seem to say it at all
I hate to disserpoint a beau
When he is payin' a call!
Fer a while I ack refined and cool,
A settin on the velveteen setee
Nen I think of thet ol' golden rule,
And do fer him what he would do fer me!
I cain't resist a Romeo
In a sombrero and chaps
Soon as I sit on their laps
Somethin' inside of me snaps
I cain't say no!


Posted by: Tasseled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 3:35 PM
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The five-year-old me used to perform that song on my grandparents' welltop (which served a a little platform stage), to the great amusement of the friends and relatives who would stop by in the evenings and the great embarrassment of my mother.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 4:00 PM
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I would consider salvia 'fun', but not in a Party sort of way.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 4:01 PM
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14
Potential to become a "gateway drug"?

Do any gateway drugs actually exist that aren't gateway drugs just because they're illegal? My understanding is that marijuana, for example, is a gateway drug because to get it you have to buy (directly or indirectly) from career criminals who might try to sell you harder stuff, and/or once you've tried it and learned it's not all that bad you might be tempted to try other illegal drugs and those actually are worse. So yeah, it's a "gateway" drug in that people who use harder drugs started on it and people who use it are more likely to go on to harder drugs than people who only used alcohol and tobacco, but that's precisely because it's illicit, not for any psycho/neuro/chemical reason.


Posted by: Cyrus | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 5:29 PM
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Well it's been a while of course but back when I was a kid my parents would put the Stockhausen or Steve Reich on the stereo only they'd unplug the left channel, then slow the RPMs down to an aperiodic cycle of 11.1 / 16.66 / and even 10.609 (which you'll recognize as 33 and a third divided by pi) and DAMN that shit was crazy. Sometimes Steve came by himself with a small string ensemble because my disreputable uncle used to bankroll modernist chamber music when he wasn't high and on those occasions my mother would have me mix up mint juleps for everyone only with salvia instead of mint, frozen custard instead of ice, and antifreeze instead of bourbon. But that was a long time ago.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 5:47 PM
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Salvia is best experienced in a silent, dark room. So, not a social drug. Easily acquired via mail, though.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 5:56 PM
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IOW a good drug for the asocial.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 5:58 PM
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||

Oh Oh Movie Review from last night

Jennifer's Body ***1/2

Oscar shared between Fox and Diablo. Page lookin weak now.

|>


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:16 PM
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IOW a good drug for the asocial.

You just said it was not asocial drug.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:20 PM
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… an aperiodic cycle?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:23 PM
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If Megan or a Megan equivalent is around, is there a nice, hippie-ish way to speed up muscle recovery from over-exertion?
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Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:27 PM
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56: Jesus, I did. That's bad even for me. I started a little early, this evening.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:30 PM
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I should probably stop commenting before I give nosflow an aneurysm.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:32 PM
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58: Hot bath? Maybe with salts? Eat lots of protein? Enjoy? I always like the feeling of being sore from exercising intensely.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:33 PM
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There exist Megan equivalents?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:33 PM
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There exist aperiodic cycles?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:33 PM
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63 see 57.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:41 PM
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(Or perhaps 52, it's hard to tell.)


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:41 PM
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a nice, hippie-ish way to speed up muscle recovery from over-exertion

Dilute an aspirin tablet by fanning a gentle breeze over it towards a glass of water, then drink the water. Oh, wait, that's the homeopathic way, sorry.


Posted by: persistently visible | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:45 PM
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I wouldn't use the word "cycle" for anything aperiodic, but Google finds a lot of instances, so I guess it's just me being overly prescriptive about language.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:49 PM
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61: I normally like the feeling too, but my body doesn't seem to be keeping up with my current activity level. It's chronic, not acute.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:51 PM
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a nice, hippie-ish way to speed up muscle recovery from over-exertion

Lifters are fucking serious about their rest. When I am going, with the endorphins, the resting is the hardest part for me. A real pain.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 6:53 PM
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aperiodic cycle 281 hits.

round square ~3,350,000 hits.

I can imagine an aperiodic cycle the same way I can imagine a round square. A round square is a square with rounded corners, and an aperiodic cycle is something that is repeating regularly in some ways, but random in others.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 7:02 PM
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Oh my. Stanley doesn't seem like a casual sex drug kind of guy: what I've heard of salvia says that you mightn't want to be casual about it. Not that it's radical, exactly, just that you wouldn't really want to be going about your business and say to someone, "Oh, that salvia? Sure, why not."

I'ma have to listen to whatever this thing is that Sifu linked to in 3. A person has to know when's the right time, you know.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 7:07 PM
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58: Last time I asked that here, Megan encouraged ibuprofen. Other recommended warm baths and moving the muscle gently through the exercise which led to the pain.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 7:51 PM
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Megan encouraged ibuprofen.

That only works because Megan is scary. I try to encourage it and it just sits in the bottle.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 7:57 PM
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Hmm, now that I see you indicated it's chronic rather than acute, you may want to look into dietary factors. Are you adequately hydrated? I seem to remember that various vitamin or mineral deficiencies can lead to muscle pain/fatigue. Can't remember which...


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 7:59 PM
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Hmm, now that I see you indicated it's chronic rather than acute, you may want to look into previous nitrous oxide abuse.

WE KNOW YOU, EGGPLANT.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 8:04 PM
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73: I sometimes blow up Tylenol bottles with cherry bombs. Pour l'encouragement d'le ibuprofène.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 8:20 PM
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44 I was for some reason reminded just this evening of the line from Notes on Camp "58. The ultimate Camp statement: it's good because it's awful." And by "reminded" I mean I think I may have read it in college but am not really sure, but I'd like to pretend it is always a ready point of reference.


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 9:56 PM
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oh come on.

its making music to take drugs to make music to.


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 10:05 PM
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Hey Eggplant, (hey y'all). Been out of town and away from internet. Sorry not to get back to you.

Ice. Twenty minutes on, twenty off, as often as you are willing do it (or your ice re-freezes)
Aspirin or ibuprofen.

Gentle versions of the movement that nailed you.

Hope you feel better soon.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 10:21 PM
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Tonight's moment of zen: long line in bookstore turned out to be an Olivia Munn book signing.

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Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 07-16-10 10:27 PM
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Hey, I just had a brilliant idea: "Eve Ensler's VAGINA! THE MUSICAL"

You don't have to give me royalties. Just a shout out in the program.

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Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-17-10 5:18 AM
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I sorta kinda hate the "Sassy Gay Friend" series but felt it should be mentioned here in light of recent discussions that there is a new one: The Giving Tree. It's not all that funny except for the line "This is turning into a snuff film!" which did make me laugh wheezily. "What's the rodenty thing that isn't a ferret?" Tom asked wheezily.

|>


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 07-17-10 9:04 AM
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A round square is a square with rounded corners

Or a circle with square corners.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 07-17-10 9:17 AM
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Ice and ibuprofen it is, then. Thanks, Megan.
There exist Megan equivalents?
Modulo hippy weightlifting, perhaps.
WE KNOW YOU, EGGPLANT.
*sniff* That's the nicest thing anyones ever said to me.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-17-10 11:42 AM
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Oklahoma, it took three years for the i-dosing "craze" to reach you? WABC in NYC was waxing hysterical about i-dosing back in '07. Oklahoma! You're so uncool.

(Watching that Oklahoma News 9 report, I thank Christ that I'm not a local newscaster. Having to repeat that kind of happy bullshit every day would drive me to drink (even more).)


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 07-19-10 9:33 AM
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iDosing... well, at least it's not cheesing.


Posted by: cleek | Link to this comment | 07-19-10 12:22 PM
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