"You cannot win the future, sir. The future fucks you."
Optimistic:
"We suck less."
Honest:
"Like you're going to vote for Mike Huckabee."
Blunt:
"We don't live in fucking Scandinavia, hippies."
Bitter:
"Enjoy Wasilla East, ingrates."
OT: Charlie Sheen published a book of his poems?
Drugs are bad.
I think "Win the Future" is perfect, because of the acronym and because we can assume Obama and staff were aware of the acronym and because O & s knew we would see the acro and O & s knew we the people would know that they, O & s, would know the acro...etc. The ironies are dizzying.
I could write a book about what "WTF" says about Obama, Democrats, and the nation. A thing of beauty is a joy forever.
I mean Stanley says "WTF" is the "dumbest" without a doubletake.
"What the fuck" does what, shows incomprehension from a sophisticated standpoint, usually?
I need to do some research in post-modernism.
Lose the future to someone else ! Bring back the good times.
Winning the future sounds like a co-opting of Newt.
Did Bill Clinton really build a bridge to this century, or was it an isthmus?
I suppose "Just do it" was already taken.
(Also, if the White House was Aware Of All Internet Traditions, they would know that the phrase is "win the morning, win the afternoon future.")
I could write a book about what "WTF" says about Obama, Democrats, and the nation.
Haven't you already? Bob, put together a collection of your blog comments and sell it though one of those print on demand services. I'll buy one. My copy of When Rabbit Howls needs company.
If at first you don't concede, you're negotiating wrong.
"Today is the first day of the next thousand years."
"You'll get nothing and like it."
"We must move forward, not backward, upward not forward, and always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom."
"Ruth Bader Ginsburg is no spring chicken, you know."
I assume, incidentally, that "win the future" was conceived in a roomful of people who were all fully conversant with (or at worst, used regularly) the vile Beltway phrase "win the week."
Oh, oh: "Future Magnificently Looming."
...I'm not conversant with "win the week", what's the problem? News-cycle strategy?
"An organic free-range chicken in every pot, two plug-in hybrid cars in every garage."
Yes, but increasingly bloated by the idea that regular people should care about it too.
"Prosperity is just around the corner. The corner over by the Salvadoran Bodega. No, not the one by the liquor store; the one where the homeless guy who smells like urine is always sleeping out front. Prosperity will be there, like, any minute now. Just hang out and wait for it."
Wait, my mistake. "Fucksaw the fucksaw."
This helps:
"The future that eats like a meal."
"Future keeps going and going."
"Come to life. Come to future."
"Half the land wars in Asia of the other leading brand."
9:Thanks for the support. I'll do it here.
Is "Win the Future/WTF" a simple flipoff? No, it is a complex flipoff, because most of the Unfoggetariat, for example, are unwilling or incapable of realizing, or if realized, acknowledging that "WTF" is a big "FUCK YOU" at the American people, and especially the more intelligent, sophisticated part of Obama's base.
They will say "it's dumb" as if this was somehow a kinder assessment of Barack Hussein Obama. But then the creative class will recoil at their own revealed racism, and start twirling like tops. "If it isn't a stupidity, then then then..."
32: Thanks, but not really what I wanted to think about while slaking my thirst.
32: Oh, that's what that thing is called!
And it's perfect, because it has always been Barry's style, from the beginning of his national career open contempt for his base has been part of why his base loves him.
"Yes We Can"
Obama has always spoken such incredibly banal trite bland nonsense that anyone with any self respect could not fail to be offended and insulted. And offense and insult was always Obama's intent, but with such a panache that not only would his audience be frightened to admit they were being insulted by their idol, but that they would feel ashamed and guilty.
A political genius with an admirable sense of humor.
"WTF" is a big "FUCK YOU" at the American people....
Big and well-deserved, really.
offense and insult was always Obama's intent
39:That's what I want to see, all you folk telling me how stupid Obama is, that he couldn't have possibly understood the acronym.
That'll be amusing.
42: Yeah, I'm really sick of hearing about those vampires.
"I won the future"
"I two the future"
etc.
"An organic free-range chicken in every pot, two plug-in hybrid cars in every garage."
"Two girls for every boy!"
And "WTF" is not an Internet secret like "AFAIC" It is as commonly understood as "SNAFU", no more than "SNAFU." It is obvious, you wear it on a t-shirt in the big city, and no one will be perplexed.
And unlike SNAFU, which can be "All Fouled Up" WTF contains an almost irreplaceable obscenity. I might turn on my tv to see Chris Matthews try "What the Fred"
There is also This Book in case you don't get it yet.
No, bob, it stands for Water The Fowl—the President's fiendish plan to hydrate the nation's chickens.
47: "This irrigation will not stand, man."
"Sure, I've been called a xenophobe, but the truth is I'm not. I just feel that America's the best country and all the other countries aren't as good. That used to be called patriotism."
"Crush our enemies, see them driven before us, and hear the lamentations of Sarah Palin."
"Let's see if we can torture more whistleblowers than the last guys did."
#47. No, in a not-so-secret rebuke to the First Lady's War On Obesity, it stands for "with the fries," the President's favorite hamburger garnish.
"Lebensraum!"
or maybe, for the neo-libs
"Arbeit macht frei!"
56,57:I'm not upset. All of a sudden, after Our Only President toured the plantations with his BFF Jeb and engaged in another round of "Wait! I can concede more! I have not yet begun to concede." with Republicans, I have regained my sense of humor.
I had this image of Hitler pretending to be Gandhi, in three sizes too large saffron hoodie, and theatrical cough so his hand can inadequately cover his funny moustache, and the Peter Sellars involuntary armjerk. Yet grown men in the audience are crying with adoration.
I need to work on this a bit.
Act two is gonna be a fucking laugh riot.
(Y'all need to visit an FDL thread, almost any thread, for ideas on sogans. They manage some amazing witty vitriol without calling Obama stupid, or weak, or cowardly or indulging in racism. They respect Our President.)
"NOw make me do it, you tossers. Do I have to fucking beg? Have none of you read any history?"
Act two is gonna be a fucking laugh riot.
Is that when Jane Hamsher and Grover Norquist enter arm-in-arm and do a little song and dance? Can't wait!
I must say, I didn't expect the future to be wearing Bugle Boy jeans. I was expecting shiny spandex or flowing white chitons. Jesus, would it kill the future to dress up once in while?
"Oh well, whatever. Never mind." should work for the foreseeable future.
"Fuck the poor!"
Or is Mel Brooks also banned?
Also, now I'm nostalgically looking for the Sloganator circa 2004.
68: "You can leave your hat on."
"In the eye of the storm."
(Doesn't make sense, but I like it anyway.)
Is that the...CDC? What a spectacularly confusing float.
It's only confusing because Americans are parochial.
On second thought, Obama could just sing "Wide World" and then glare meaningfully over the lectern. This would probably work.
73: I had not noticed the letters and had no explanation. But I think it is "CDU" and that is Angela Merkel.
If it wasn't from back when Bush was president, apparently we need a slogan to keep the Germans from making more "Chancellor Buttplug" floats.
Or not. It is clear that somebody really enjoyed their job and got the cheeks rounded just so.
78: Moby's intimate knowledge of Uncle Sam's buttcheeks, let him show it to you.
"Reagan, Obama? Friends? Lovers!"
On second thought, Obama could just sing "Wide World" and then glare meaningfully over the lectern. This would probably work.
"Wild World"? Or something I don't know, that Google isn't helping with?
83: Goddammit. Yes, Wild World. I do that every time. Also, still have a slight fever from the flu.
"Spanning the globe to bring you the constant variety of conflict... the thrill of victory... and the agony of defeat... the human drama of martial competition... This is the USA's Wide World of War!"
I've got the fever for the flavor of some freedom! Win the future!
Y'know, the "Win the future" slogan is weird. I mean, the idea is to invest in future technologies, research, blah blah, and in education, but apparently the thinking was that "invest" is a dirty word, since it sounds like it involves spending money, which is awful, because everyone knows that spending money in the name of future returns or even stability is stoopid .... But! The thinking then apparently goes that what America does like is winning! It likes a contest, and knows it's already the best anyway, and nobody's suggesting it's not already the best or anything, but let's all have a group project, because what we really have here is a race! It's like the space race, or the arms race, that kind of thing, see? Plus we all hate a loser, don't we, and we obviously aren't losers, so: Win the future! Yay!
I just thought I'd spell that all out. I'd frankly hate to be the White House team having to work on messaging given the American public we have.
Win the future, because right now we're fucked.
Winning? I'll be honest here. This is tripe. Utter tripe. Even Paula could think of a better slogan.
90
I just thought I'd spell that all out. I'd frankly hate to be the White House team having to work on messaging given the American public we have.
The messaging might be easier if the substance was better.
94: Dude, the substance is decent. Invest in new technologies (green, renewables, transportation), and in repairing/upgrading the old (infrastructure), and in education, because it's arguably the one issue that most affects outcomes. I don't see anything wrong with that.
I'm off now.
All the good substances are illegal.
I've seen the future, baby:
it is murder
I guess 96 works better for Biden than Obama.
OT: Has Greg Gumbel been sick or something?
I can't figure out the hair thing he has going.
Dude, the substance is decent
The substance is for shit. Those "green technologies, renewables, etc." Obama is talking about include coal, nuclear, and hydrofracking natural gas. And while he talks about "winning the future," he's gutting the present - slashing any program for poor families he can find while shoveling trillions of dollars into Wall Street and an unending Pentagon death machine. Fuck Obama. Fuck him right in the ass.
As long as he doesn't come out for the Tarheels.
There was a pair a cardinals outside my window today. Presumably a nesting pair, but for all I know my backyard is where cardinals go when they want a wicked weekend.
"There is hope, but not for us."
BAM! Hi five bro
oh wait you're a corpse, nvrmnd
,or, if you want hope, become a new person. you don't even have a choice about that, time rolls on.
Morning, guys! I love checking in with you folks when I wake up.
