"The retest will be public and on the board. You'll have one question. I'll grade it on the spot."

"If you fail, I'm taking this Sharpie and drawing a penis labeled 'Differentiation' on your face."

One time during a faculty meeting, one of the higher-ups described our student body as "lacking a sense of urgency" which is very, very apt.

So I'm not altogether surprised that the public humiliation was lost on them. They're very friendly and open about their laziness.

I think I detect that in my baby siblings and attribute to to generational differences. But then, my Dad describes me the same way. But the man got his Ph.D. at 21. Everyone lacks a sense of urgency compared to him.

I sort of enjoy teaching students who lack a sense of urgency? There aren't obnoxious about grade-grubbing for a higher grade, the way I remember some kids being from my own undergrad. They seem to cheat much less than at other schools.

Are you teaching a super-large class in this course? I forget.

Nope, all our classes are usually under 30.

Why do you hate non-traditional students?

I originally focussed on what I thought was the phrase "students ... calculus protest" and imagined kids with placards saying "PROF HEEBIE UNFAIR TO STUDENTS, MAKES US DO CALCULUS!!!". Boy, was I disappointed.

TWO
FOUR
SIX
EIGHT
WE WON'T DIFFERENTIATE!

I think it's cool that this drew the students out. Perhaps it's a bit much to call personal attention to learning "babying". Though I suppose it might be different given that this is for prerequisite knowledge rather than the course content.