Re: Text has made a post

1

I've known plenty of christians who do this with the bible. Using Carver is a twist, I guess.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:46 AM
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2

I'm not saying you ain't pretty, I'm just saying I'm not ready.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:49 AM
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3

I like this better.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:51 AM
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4

If you like it so much, why don't you make a proper link?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:54 AM
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5

I guess they fucked him up good.


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:58 AM
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6

I guess they fucked him up good.


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:59 AM
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7

Twinsies!


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:59 AM
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8

Definitely a bot. But a good one!


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 10:00 AM
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9

we prefer to be called RO-bots.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 10:04 AM
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10

For some reason my browser or this site or my mum and dad won't allow me to make a proper href, at least not in the way I've been making them lo these many years.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 10:14 AM
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11

Sad!


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 10:20 AM
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12

Isn't it though?

I'm going to try again.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 10:25 AM
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13

Well now the sadness is all cleared, thanks Mitch!


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 10:32 AM
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14

Using Carver is a twist, I guess.

I know somebody who would read Invisible Cities in that way, though I don't know how long they kept it up for.


Posted by: NickS | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 11:47 AM
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15

14: Up to 4 hours.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 12:30 PM
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16

There is no subtext.


Posted by: Subtext | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 12:58 PM
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17

Wait a minute, that subtext looks just like John Emerson.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 1:14 PM
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18

17: But what are you really trying to say?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 1:15 PM
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19

I am not a symbolist.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 1:15 PM
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20

I know somebody who would read Invisible Cities in that way, though I don't know how long they kept it up for.

For a while I read one city every night before bed, though not in a random order, because that just seems like more trouble than it's worth. Ditto for Borges's Book of Imaginary Beings.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:27 PM
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21

I took a class in college with a dude who is now a fancy-pants winemaker* in which we read Invisible Cities in tandem with Herodotos' Histories.

*He was a professor then!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:30 PM
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22

The Aeneid has traditionally been used in the manner suggested by the OP.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:30 PM
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23

For years, I'd read random parts of The Fran Lebowitz Reader while I pooped. I didn't really follow it with a period of reflection.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:32 PM
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24

I read Invisible Cities in a class with William Gass, and he gave us a chart he'd made of the spiral structure of the stories' order. I didn't get the point of that at all. His lectures on some of the individual cities were amazing, though.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:42 PM
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25

I always read when I poop, and I always follow it with reflection. Some people think that's a gross waste of time.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:55 PM
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26

I've never to my knowledge used the Aeneid in any way at all. I am in favor of reading all things out of order though.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:57 PM
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27

21 sounds like so much fun!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 3:58 PM
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28

I'm trying to be polite, but I don't actually think that anyone can do this sort of exercise with any book aside from Raymond Carver's Will You Please Be Quiet Please. And it's probably got to be the one I have. If you think you can do it with something else, I'm not just going to take your say-so, you've got to prove it right here.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 4:22 PM
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29

There's a character in Wilkie Collins's The Moonstone who performs this sort of bibliomancy with . During my most precious phase, I was doing it with...damn, now I can't remember. Baudelaire maybe? It was something terribly pretentious.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 4:48 PM
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30

that figures.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 4:57 PM
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31

Arg, screwed up the tag: it was Robinson Crusoe for the Wilkie Collins character.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 5:05 PM
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32

21: I just yesterday received an invite for a tasting with him.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 5:44 PM
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33

32: Me too!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 5:49 PM
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34

That sounds like fun. Doesn't he teach anymore?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 6:53 PM
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35

Databased everything provides so many opportunities for sortilege. Paragraphs, volumes, MP3s, RSS entries, /dev/null. (The last slightly nihilistic.)


Posted by: clew | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 6:58 PM
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36

Did you really just write "sortilege"? I suppose everything provides many opportunities for quite a lot!


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:07 PM
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37

If you were doing it with Baudelaire, you'd remember that one, right JM? Probably a little more active than the other corpses.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:10 PM
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38

I like to make posts! So what's up with those yahoos this year?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:11 PM
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39

Gets lonely at night anymore, huh?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:21 PM
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40

no, not really. I just have to edit this really awful manuscript.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:23 PM
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41

did you ride your stolen bicycles today?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:24 PM
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42

Why would you think I have stolen bicycles?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:26 PM
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43

because you were telling us all about them in that other thread. and because you seem like the type, frankly.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:29 PM
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44

you didn't answer my question though, which is whether your rode the bicycles you stole.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:31 PM
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45

I was telling you about stolen bicycles? I'm not sure what that refers to. I was talking about the economics of stealing bicycles to gswift, because it frustrates me that it's so easy to steal bicycles and there's so little potential downside. But I have nothing in particular to say about stolen bicycles.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:31 PM
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46

The one time that I owned a bicycle that I (belatedly) realized was stolen I did ride pretty much every day, yes. Then it got stolen from me.

Why, do you?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:32 PM
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47

That's exactly what I meant when I wrote that you sound like a petty thief.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:32 PM
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48

Sorry, what is?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:33 PM
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49

I'm incapable of stealing anything. I used to steal chicken nuggets from the lunch line in the 8th grade, and maybe 7th grade, by eating them on the way to the register. Those statements appear to contradict. I am incapable of stealing non-delicious birds.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:35 PM
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50

That you would write something like 45 in response to being called out on stealing bicycles.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:35 PM
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51

or write "you don't have my email" and then disappear.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:36 PM
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52

I used to steal chicken nuggets from the lunch line in the 8th grade, and maybe 7th grade, by eating them on the way to the register.

That's a lot more than I've ever stolen. Do you think it's a character thing with you?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:36 PM
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53

No, not really. To both questions.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:36 PM
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54

50: so you're saying that were I not a thief I would react to being called a thief in some way other than being sort of confused and looking for clarification?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:37 PM
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53: sorry again, I don't really know what "both questions" means. You think your stealing isn't a character thing with you and... what?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:38 PM
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56

I'm saying that I think you're a thief, Sifu. Does that make you sad?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:39 PM
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57

Are you really this stupid or do you have nothing to say in response to what I write other than that you're confused?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:40 PM
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58

Are you really this stupid or is that all you've been able to parse from the questions I've been asking you?

Nah, that's unfair. I know you're not stupid. You're lonely and sad and trying to start fights, but you aren't stupid.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:41 PM
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59

Which I understand. I've been so mean to random people online just because I was in a really lonely place. I like to think I did a better job of it than you have thus far, but that might just be ego.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:41 PM
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60

All you had to do was tell me you didn't ride your stolen bikes today and we'd have been finished with that inquiry.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:43 PM
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61

What stolen bikes?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:43 PM
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62

Then I'd move on to asking whether you planned to ride them tomorrow.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:44 PM
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63

The ones in your possession.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:45 PM
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64

Yeah, still lost, sorry. What stolen bikes?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:45 PM
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65

Oh, I see. Well, I don't possess any stolen bikes, so it would have been difficult for me to ride any, unless I borrowed somebody else's.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:45 PM
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66

Is that what you were asking? If I borrowed somebody else's stolen bike?

I didn't borrow anybody's bike today, so no, but even if I had I'm not sure how I would have known if it was stolen or not.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:46 PM
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67

Do you think this isn't fun for me? The ones a petty thief would steal and then brag about on the internet, like you did.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:46 PM
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68

The ones in your possession.

Present king of France.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:48 PM
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69

Do you think this isn't fun for me?

I hope not, but if I'm being honest I think so, yeah. I should probably stop.

The ones a petty thief would steal and then brag about on the internet, like you did.

Lost me there, since I didn't do that. I do own bikes. Is that what's confusing you?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:48 PM
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Oh wait do you mean that since I talked about bike theft that I probably own stolen bikes? That's an interesting way to look at it. You talked about stolen bikes, too, in the context of my conversation. You have stolen bikes? Did you ride them today? If not, why not? Too sad?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:49 PM
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71

Is bald.


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:50 PM
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72

I can see being guilty because they're stolen but you should ride your bikes; it might cheer you up. Definitely riding bikes always cheers me up.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:50 PM
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73

I still want to know what everyone has stolen. Why won't people just say what they have stolen and why? This is a crime blog after all.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:50 PM
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74

I once stole an english muffin, but it was an accident. I walked out of the store with it without realizing it. Nothing compared to text's larceny.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:51 PM
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75

74: Did you ride it?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:53 PM
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76

sifu, I was mostly kidding before, but now I'm pretty sure that you're a thief.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:53 PM
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77

Likewise, text. I mean I'm close to 100%, since you admitted it.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:55 PM
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78

this is a blog for tough love, JP. That's why you're here, right?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:55 PM
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79

Now I'm pretty sure Sifu has embezzled money too. Do you have rich clients?


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:56 PM
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80

Clients?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 7:57 PM
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81

Good, I guess they're safe.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:00 PM
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82

If you were doing it with Baudelaire, you'd remember that one, right JM?

No, that was the year when a whole bunch of classes assigned various Baudelaire texts. I was very excited about Baudelaire and read basically everything he wrote.

Some friends and I also got interested in Surrealist games at that time and did a bunch of exercises in random meaning-making, bibliomancy among them.

Our favorite game in that vein was always "Why-Because," which I actually managed to persuade people to play this week. (Person 1 writes down five "why" questions; person 2 independently writes down five "because" answers. Read out in order. With additional participants, add clauses like "however" or "therefore.") Good bar game.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:01 PM
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83

You're probably only capable of stealing low-cost items.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:01 PM
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84

That was for Sifu. I think Jackmormon could probably be a cat burglar if she wanted to be.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:02 PM
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85

"Why-Because" sounds fun. You could also try "If Only-But Alas"


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:07 PM
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86

Hmm... the return acts of commenters with single-syllable pseuds starting with "t" seem to share certain characteristics.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:15 PM
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87

Maybe it's not an act.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:30 PM
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88

I've been so mean to random people online just because I was in a really lonely place.
Wait, does this help?


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:43 PM
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89

No.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:48 PM
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90

It only works if you're mean to loved ones.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:52 PM
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91

Oh.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:53 PM
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92

How can you tell if they're loved? I guess this means libertarians and econ blog commenters are ruled out.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 8:56 PM
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93

92.1: Klout score.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:00 PM
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94

Is this the awkwardest thread?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:45 PM
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95

86 had me tripped up confused for a while.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 10-18-12 9:46 PM
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I like awkward people. Not because of the great conversation but because of the history of the word. The great Awk, though generous, was not known for instilling confidence in his wards.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 10-19-12 6:57 AM
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