Re: Taking Stock

1

I'd have thought 'knowing a guy' would become more credible with age, not less. I certainly know more 'guys' than I did when I was in my twenties.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:28 AM
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I'm not even sure if you're talking about knowing criminals or referring people to your accountant.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:46 AM
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Yes, with the lamentable exception of procuring illegal drugs, I definitely know way more guys capable of resolving situations than I did when I was younger.


Posted by: real ffeJ annaH | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:47 AM
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"Relax, I know a guy. He can't help you at all, but he's a guy and I know him."


Posted by: AcademicLurker | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:48 AM
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Yeah, I mean knowing a guy in a biblical extra-legal way; like calling Mr. Fox in Pulp Fiction, or in the sense of my friend's dad, who happened to mention to a guy that his wife wanted new China, only to have that guy show up a few days later with a trunk full of new (new?) China for him. But I don't just mean knowing criminals; more fix-it guys. Maybe those guys are typically criminals.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:53 AM
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Joff-tchoff-tchoffo-tchoffo-tchoff!


Posted by: Mr. Fox | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:03 AM
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The "guys" I know are all washed up and have kids.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:05 AM
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Actually, there is one guy I still know, but he's pushing 40 and needs to grow the fuck up.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:07 AM
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But you know (at least online) guys who know guys. That's almost as good. If you make an enemy, he would become our enemy. And then he would fear you. Or he would be found in a sorry condition somewhere in Alaska having been abducted, sedated, seduced, sued, mocked, boycotted, out-argued, re-designed, crocheted and then kicked repeatedly in the head.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:10 AM
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It's not that you're too old, ogged, it's that you've rejected your immigrant heritage.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:11 AM
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Isn't "Relax, I know a guy" one of Saul Goodman's more common lines?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:15 AM
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you know (at least online) guys who know guys

Let me try this out. "Relax, I "know" a guy online who knows some guys."

it's that you've rejected your immigrant heritage.

God, you're right. I actually do know a guy who could totally be that guy, but I haven't stayed in any kind of touch. My mistake!


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:15 AM
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He who knows guys should see to it that he himself does not become a known guy. And when you long know a guy, the guy also knows you.


Posted by: real ffeJ annaH | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:19 AM
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No wait, Saul Goodman generally knows a guy who knows a guy.

But hey, I should have guessed this website existed.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:20 AM
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12.last: I know this because my mom has a greek friend who always "knows a guy" (or actually "has a guy"). Need a car? He's got a guy. Tax advice? He's got a guy. Stone wall to build? He's got a guy. Want to buy a cheap boat? He's got a guy.

N.B. the greek friend in question is a retired judge. The complex interplay between this fact and the other facts mentioned left implicit.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:32 AM
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Judges only have expensive boats?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:33 AM
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17

Judges meet a lot of a guy.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:35 AM
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18

Right, they say that if you want a hitman, talk to a an ex-cop (he'll know a guy).


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:35 AM
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I think I have pink eye and that I got it from a retired judge.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:37 AM
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20

Need some tobramycin drops? I know a guy.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:53 AM
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21

What does the wolf say?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:00 AM
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Was it Mr. Wolf? Christ, I've been reading Fantastic Mr. Fox too many times.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:05 AM
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Not to worry. You get old enough and don't care about anything, you can be your own guy.


Posted by: biohazard | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:08 AM
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People who can get things done usually avoid casual engagement IME. Knowing someone competent is basically having status, saying so is boasting about it.

Also, the attitude towards favors/exchanging help are different among native-born Americans (basically, don't do this ever-- services are mostly paid for and chosen like consumer goods in a store; OK, maybe this is mostly for middle-aged, well off people) and among immigrants (Yes, I'll put up a tenously-connected stranger in my house for a few nights, or help someone move). While it was kind of cloying in places, My Big Fat Greek Wedding got this basically right.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:10 AM
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24 seems wrong, because old boys' network.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:11 AM
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9: abducted, sedated, seduced, sued, mocked, boycotted, out-argued, re-designed, crocheted and then kicked repeatedly in the head.

I can't help but wonder who fits in where on this list. I mean, I know where I do, but everyone else?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:11 AM
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26: I'm pretty confident where I land.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:18 AM
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25, Old boys' networks wont drive a trunk full of China up to your house or help you move if you're short on money.

They might be good for internship suggestions for a growing kid, or a broad discussion of whether your business plan is well suited to cloud services or something. I don't really think of that as knowing a guy, and honestly, I do not see WASPs helping each other out in jams.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Bl1qP8_CUAEvAI1.jpg:large


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:20 AM
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They're just different kinds of jams. "Oh no how do I figure out if I'm going to be indicted by the task force?" "I know a guy let me check."


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:23 AM
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At this point in my life, if someone I know is in a jam, I know so many guys* it's not even funny... that is, provided that the problem can be resolved by either debugging complex Excel formulas or rendering data in a visually appealing PowerPoint slide.

*girls, too!


Posted by: knecht ruprecht | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:29 AM
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31

Where and when did 28.last come from?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:29 AM
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31: Those are all the people lw asked to kill someone as a favor, but said no.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:30 AM
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33

Where and when did 28.last come from?

My guess is it is screening for eligibility for particular endowed scholarships / fellowships. Harvard's lawyers have managed to pry open most of these ancient trusts to make the money more fungible, but they are still obligated in many cases to give preference to the favored beneficiaries of the donor.


Posted by: knecht ruprecht | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:34 AM
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34

They're just different kinds of jams.

Sifu understands knowing a guy culture.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:35 AM
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33: I saw it referenced as being part of some Harvard grad school application. Presumably to see if some you come with some bonus funding per 33.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:37 AM
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They're just different kinds of jams. "Oh no how do I figure out if I'm going to be indicted by the task force?" "I know a guy let me check."

Exactly.

Your forties is the sweet spot for this stuff. You know lots of older people and younger people to send people to see.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:40 AM
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37

Happy birthday?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:43 AM
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38

Nope.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:45 AM
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39

Twitter, where it's described as part of the grad school application there.

https://twitter.com/DeclanBowman/status/458639559358566400


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:45 AM
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40

Happy early forties?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:47 AM
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41

Totes.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:50 AM
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42

ogged's jams now involve needing a guy for:

1. babysitting
2.stain removal
3.what to do with sick kids
4.what to do with cranky kids
5.getting into preschool


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:01 AM
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re: 26

I'm going to be pretty pissed off if I only get to perform one of the roles on that list.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:04 AM
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44

These days, I actually live quite close to a few of my friends, for the first time in years. I'm pretty sure for lots of things they probably do know a 'guy' [they are working class Irish or Mackem guys], although none of them are criminally shady. So, getting a van at short notice, or finding a tradesman who'll do something as a 'homer', yes. Having someone beaten up, or getting hold of something unambiguously illegal, no.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:07 AM
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||

At a talk on bottom-up derivation of Haidt-style moral violation categories. Somebody on Mechanical Turk apparently thinks "starting a business without planning ahead" is a moral violation.

|>


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:07 AM
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In my teens and early twenties, I probably knew 'guys' for quite a lot of very definitely illegal things. Although, I would never have been stupid enough to ask for favours from most of them.

When I got beaten up once, aged about 16, the guy in question had to move. As my 'guys'* were known to be after him. I called them off, but it was quite nice to know someone sort of had my back.

* just some local biker types, and petty criminal friends from school. Not serious crooks. But they'd have fucked him up if they'd caught him.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:10 AM
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47

Unfogged would eat this up, actually. Maybe I'll try to come up with a way to share more of it with you.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:10 AM
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48

It would make Cosma very sad, though.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:17 AM
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43: Yeah, figuring in that I was slotted in as the crochet expert was a bit of a blow. I mean, fair enough, I suppose, but still.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:19 AM
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28.1: I was helping so many people move back in graduate school. Never go to grad school with a pickup because you'll be moving dozens of people.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:22 AM
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51

re: 49

I assumed you were also under 'out-argued'.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:24 AM
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52

I used to know car thieves and people who would take the SATs for you. Neither of those capacities were useful to me. Now they are all orthopedic surgeons, which I suppose I might need one day.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:26 AM
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53

I get called on to watch other people's kids, which seems eminently reasonable.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:27 AM
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54

I had hopes for "seduced, sued, mocked ... and then kicked repeatedly in the head" as well.

I lead a rich, full, fantasy life.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:28 AM
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55

It sounds like Arlo Guthrie is describing this person's draft admission process.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:31 AM
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56

I don't think I'm much good for anything on that list other than "mocked," but we've got a deep bench here for that particular skill.


Posted by: MAE | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:38 AM
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||

Unpleasant bit of settlement negotiations there. I never know when lawyers shouting are genuinely insane or shamming irrationality for negotiating purposes. And I'm never sure with that kind of interaction whether staying calm myself is inflammatory, and if there's something other than staying calm that would be chilling things out better. I mean, I'd hate to miss a good deal because my affect makes the nutcase I'm talking to enraged, but with that kind of guy I'm not clear on how to be less enraging.

|>


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:41 AM
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58

When you figure 57 out, let me know, because we've got a similar thing going on with Hawaii.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:42 AM
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58: you'll crush her when it gets before a judge.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:42 AM
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Every now and then we muse "Wouldn't life be easier with just one kid?" but then we always continue "But that would be Hawaii" who is by far our most difficult kid, and life would not actually be particularly less work. So we always end up saying we might as well have had the easy kids, too.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:44 AM
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59: I wouldn't be in settlement negotiations if the substance of the issues weren't such that that isn't a sure thing. And while I'm calling the guy a nutcase because it makes me happy, he's actually pretty good in front of a judge.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:46 AM
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61: I meant Heebie. You should try to settle, for sure.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:48 AM
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54: I had you pegged for all of those!

Honestly, it would be totally unfair if we just had one person for each slot.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:50 AM
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64

It's funny, but I don't think I've ever been in a settlement negotiation where there was screaming. Plenty of other disputes, sure, but IME if you're talking settlement at all you're close to a deal and people shift into "apparently reasonable" mode. Maybe if there's a real sense of betrayal on something previously promised, but even there I think it's just been more like "this is ridiculous, the negotiation is over" and then back to the fight.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:55 AM
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63: sure, but there are some people whom we should rule out of some of the categories. Anyone with a chronic limp should probably be excused kicking duties, for example.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:59 AM
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Speaking of knowing a guy, I asked my PI friend (who is not, strictly speaking, a guy) about finding local PIs in foreign countries, and she said a person should just inquire at the American embassy, because they use them all the time. So, the state department knows a bunch of guys.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:01 AM
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64: Hrm. I get it a fair amount -- I figure it as a form of playing chicken: "I'm just crazy enough to blow up this deal unless we get some more concessions." I am also, I think, often litigating at a less classy level than you are -- opposing counsel in this case is a two-man firm being hired by a smallish business, not BigLaw.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:03 AM
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45: I don't think I'm clear on what "bottom-up derivation" means in this context.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:07 AM
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Maybe top-down would be "from abstract reasoning" or something, so bottom-up might be from empirical data? I guess that would be logical but I'm used to such an idiosyncratic version of the bottom-up versus top-down distinction that it seems counterintuitive to me.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:08 AM
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67.cont: Also, maybe I'm just more irritating than you are?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:09 AM
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71

70. Contest time!


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:10 AM
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72

Two lawyers enter! One lawyer reduces the other to incoherent rage! Two lawyers enter!...


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:12 AM
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Sifu's 15 is funny to me because the most "has a guy" person I know is a 70-year-old New England matron. She can have 2 guys from Cranston with a pickup truck at your disposal within 2 hours for basically any task. Or, like, a surveyor, or whatever.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:21 AM
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70 and previous: whaaaaat?! Settlement negotiations in NYC don't have the laid-back, mellow vibe of those that happen in the (loose) orbit of the entertainment industry in LA? How can this be?!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:27 AM
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Presumably Halford's negotiations start with everybody agreeing that they are not only on the same page, but that the page in question is the best possible outcome for everybody involved, and not only that, perhaps the most perfect example of a settlement ever devised in the history of the earth, a document anybody would be proud -- nay, honored -- to be a party to, and then end with no agreement.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:28 AM
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I practiced at about the lowest level there is, and encountered shouting and crying several times a year. I used to dream of the civilities of commercial litigation.


Posted by: idp | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:34 AM
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Somebody on Mechanical Turk apparently thinks "starting a business without planning ahead" is a moral violation.

Well, if you think of starting a business as implying borrowing money or labor from friends and family this would make sense, but that's a bit of a stretch.


Posted by: NickS | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:40 AM
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Based on stories from a consultant friend vs. those from a BigLaw friend, it sounds like consultants deal with true crazy that most lawyers never see.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:40 AM
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I'm pretty sure for lots of things they probably do know a 'guy' [they are working class Irish or Mackem guys], although none of them are criminally shady. So, getting a van at short notice, or finding a tradesman who'll do something as a 'homer', yes.

For this type of thing, I too now know 'guys.' Never before has this been the case; nor was it the case in my childhood, as far as I can tell. (Now, if you needed a guy who could loan you a mandolin, we had one of those.) I can't tell if it is a cultural difference between California and southernish England; if it is a difference in how I'm integrated into the community (among business owners/retailers rather than medical/educational professionals); or what. It's nice knowing we can get shit done, though.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:46 AM
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78: yeah I mean I think there are certainly some industries where, beyond a certain level of seniority, being a screaming, chaotic, emotionally labile baby-person is pretty much an accepted method for deal-making.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:50 AM
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Lawyers at all levels of classiness scream all the time here. It's just in the particular settlement negotiation context I can't remember it, even from people who were full throated screaming about discovery or whatever.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:55 AM
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73 She can have 2 guys from Cranston with a pickup truck at your disposal within 2 hours for basically any task. Or, like, a surveyor, or whatever.

What about an African tour guide?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 10:58 AM
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80: I don't usually think of academia as an "industry", but it fits.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:00 AM
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84

I guess 82 is in bad taste.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:05 AM
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85

68: I assumed it meant something like crowd-sourcing a bunch of ideas, and then trying to discover commonality between them, instead of reasoning top-down from fundamental principals. Something like that.


Posted by: Dave W. | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:22 AM
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||

We put a call out on campus to see if anyone wanted to take over my Monstrous Administrative Program, and hadn't heard from anyone, and I was feeling low. Turns out multiple highly competent people emailed the provost directly, expressing interest! I'm so goddamn relieved. Take it, it's yours! Get it off me.

Two more weeks until I'm on sabbatical!

|>


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:35 AM
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Oop, I missed 68. 85 is right; asking a ton of people on Turk to come up with moral violations, clustering them and then doing factor analysis.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:39 AM
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68: I assumed it meant something like crowd-sourcing a bunch of ideas, and then trying to discover commonality between them, instead of reasoning top-down from fundamental principals. Something like that.


Posted by: Dave W. | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:43 AM
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28: Old boys' networks, though, will get you your job at the heart of the British intelligence services back after you've basically been caught bang to rights as a Soviet spy and incidentally driven your wife to suicide.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:44 AM
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Two more weeks until I'm on sabbatical!

Staying near home, or traveling somewhere?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:44 AM
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88 is right, too.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:46 AM
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Staying near home. Some collaboration up in Austin with people who faintly terrify me.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:46 AM
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91: Oops.


Posted by: Dave W. | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 11:56 AM
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92:
Kraab and M/M are terrifying to me too.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:05 PM
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Based on stories from a consultant friend vs. those from a BigLaw friend, it sounds like consultants deal with true crazy that most lawyers never see.

Biglaw doesn't equal most lawyers. I would be happy to have a crazy-off with consultants. There is no way that consultants deal with true crazy more than we do.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:08 PM
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I would bet heavily on Will's side in that crazy-off. (The family lawyer on the other side in my divorce tried yelling at me. I just laughed at him and called his bluff and so it didn't work, but he clearly operated on a yell-first principle. And that's just the lawyers, not the clients).


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:25 PM
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There is no way that consultants deal with true crazy more than we do.

Probably true. But my friend told of a client who insisted on meeting in a hotel hot tub, from which he would emerge naked, walking around it, his cock at my friend's eye-level, loudly berating my friend and his firm for several minutes at a time. This is more "how much shit do you have to eat" than "how much crazy do you see," I think, but it's still pretty crazy.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:33 PM
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In a settlement conference, a wife once offered to give her underwear to my client and me so that we could sell them bc she thought our demands were too high. She was fired up and stood up abruptly and my first thought was "oh shit! She is going to take them off and hand them to me right now!"


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:42 PM
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98: Lee's settlement conference is tomorrow. I'll suggest not doing that.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:44 PM
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There is no way that consultants deal with true crazy more than we do.>/i>

It's like you don't even watch House of Lies.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:45 PM
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101

I don't know what I did with the tags there.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 12:46 PM
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asking a ton of people on Turk to come up with moral violations

Is Turk really the place to ask about moral violations? Those people would stab a hobo for 85 cents.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 1:11 PM
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I didn't notice "stabbing a hobo" among the violations listed. He did name his two main factors "libertines" and "psychopaths", so maybe that's because Turk is full of psychopaths.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 1:29 PM
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28, 33: I know a guy who can check yes to one of those boxes. Grew up as a nicely middle-class faculty kid but got insanely rich in telecom. At least one of his kids benefited from the same trust anyway.


Posted by: DaveLHI | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 2:10 PM
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OT: I have just been gifted a used bicycle and I'm fairly certain this isn't somebody trying to see if I won't die in traffic. It's very old looking and says "Phillips" and "Made in England." It's a three-speed with old-man handle bars. Is it going to be a pain on hills?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 3:10 PM
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There aren't any hills in Pittsburgh, so it shouldn't be a problem.

Will it be a pain on a dissected plateau? Who can tell?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 3:12 PM
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a three-speed with old-man handle bars

Old-mandle bars.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 3:14 PM
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It's always heartwarming to see how quickly Unfogged yields helpful responses to earnest questions like Moby's.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 3:18 PM
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"GIFT" IS NOT A VERB!!!!!!!!!!


Posted by: OPINIONATED DECENT HUMAN BEING | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 3:33 PM
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IT IS NOW!


Posted by: OPINIONATED DESCRIPTIVIST | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 3:48 PM
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I guess I know a fair amount of guys. Certainly more than I did 15 years ago. Maybe less than 5 years ago, though. Most of my most solid guys are through the activist/weird arts scene though, so I can totally put you in touch with people who do unlicensed tree-trimming, or are good at hanging lights, or could get you a deal on some costuming help. Not so much with having dead bodies disposed of.

I do know any number of people who could answer Moby's question in exhaustive detail, some of them with direct biking-in-P'burgh experience.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 3:58 PM
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"Gift" as a verb bugs the shit out of me because I've watched it happen. I heard it for the first time 20+ years ago in wills and trusts class and now it's everywhere. I guess people thought that imitating lawyerly affectations made them sound smarter, but it didn't, and now it's too late.


Posted by: DaveLHI | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 4:19 PM
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From my local mothers board:

Anyone have a home remedy for a "boo-boo" that is getting infected. The Dr said he wants to give oral antibiotics but i said I could fix it. He said if i cant make it better by monday i have to call him. its kinda deep under the skin so ive been soaking him in epsom salt baths and its looking better. any suggestions? he is almost two and its on the back of his heal..

Gross, and jesus. People are suggesting silver and oil and other hocus-pocus.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 4:23 PM
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From Peace Corps experience, frequent hot water soaks with epsom salts probably will work fine. (Or regular salt. The heat's the main thing.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 4:27 PM
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113: Using real medicine is too easy. This mom needs a challenge. She can parlay her success into a "one weird trick to avoid antibiotics" campaign. (Do you kind of want to suggest Neosporin or some other topical?) Poor kid.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 4:30 PM
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113, 114: Heated pitch.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 4:33 PM
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The facts in PI cases involving tree trimmers are the most astounding parade of idiocies, really beyond imagining. Baroque contortions of stupidity. A high proportion of plaintiffs are survivors.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 4:55 PM
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105: does it feel heavy? If no, does it have a sticker on the frame someplace that says "531"? If yes, it might not be too sluggish on hills. Should be fun either way, though.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 5:13 PM
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the most astounding parade of idiocies, really beyond imagining

This place is full of lawyers and academics. Imagining idiocies is pretty much what we all do.


Posted by: DaveLHI | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 5:31 PM
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Yes, and I could imagine some of them, it was remarkable that many of them I could NOT have imagined. Worked my way through a tedious stack and was like "cut off not only the limb you are sitting on but also your own limb? could've happened to anyone, apparently happens every day!" but auto electrocution by ladder? myriad methods of self strangulation, acrobatic self impalement...


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 5:37 PM
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he is almost two seventeen and its on the back of his heal.


Posted by: Calvin Cooldige | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 5:58 PM
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105:

Those are reasonably lightweight. Design has come around to internal gearing because it's so weatherproof. Could be an excellent bike if it fits you, and if you're a little big for it you can extend both handlebars and seatpost by simple parts swap. Tune is important, properly lubricated they run very well. If the gears aren't quite right for your rides the sprocket can be changed; a tooth either way makes a big difference.


Posted by: idp | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:35 PM
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I heard it for the first time 20+ years ago in wills and trusts class

If in use 30+ years ago in wills and trusts it made no impression on me. Lawyers used to try to avoid sounding barbaric, but that might have picked up cachet more recently.


Posted by: idp | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:40 PM
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I know a diamond guy. Got me and two of my friends good rocks at a good price. My sister-in-law trained as a gemologist & she passed him on to me.

I feel like I probably know a number of guys but I don't emit that "you can tell me anything, I'll be cool" signal. I would be a better writer if I did.


Posted by: k-sky | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:55 PM
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Gross, and jesus. People are suggesting silver and oil and other hocus-pocus.

One of the other auto theft detectives wives is a nurse in the pediatric ICU. Endless stories of this kind of shit and worse. The last one involved an idiot couple and their bigger idiot midwife not knowing what to do with a newborn with a meconium clogged airway during an at home birth. Naturally the whole "let's give it a bit and see if it fixes itself" results in a hopelessly brain damaged baby. The couple then resists taking the baby off of life support because they want to try rubbing essential oils on the baby's feet. Don't worry though, "these things happen" and overall they rate the experience with that midwife as a positive one and plan on using her again.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 6:56 PM
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118: Not that heavy, but I don't have much basis for comparison. There are no stickers on the frame.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:04 PM
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122: It does look like internal gearing. At least, there is a shifter on the handle bar but I can't see any gears. The rear hub is very big.

It looks like this bike. It doesn't have basket and does have rear rack. The seat on mine is also Brooks and very, very old. This bike is obviously so old that it seems fitting photos of it should be on Anglefire.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:09 PM
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125: Utah really needs to start nailing some of these "midwives" to the wall.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:13 PM
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126: then try it and see is my advice.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:13 PM
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It's dark and I've been drinking. Also, fixing a leaking sink.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:13 PM
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I didn't necessarily mean immediately. The hills, insofar as they are hills, will probably be there tomorrow.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:24 PM
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Anyone know a guy who does real estate law in PA? JRoth?


Posted by: Den E. Crumb | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:52 PM
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Are you going to try to sell the hills before I can ride on them?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 7:57 PM
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We know you can always just build new ones out of cob, so it's no big loss.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:05 PM
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Seriously, they're good bikes. Will need adjustment both to fit you and to be sure they're in good running order. A knowledgeable friend would be best and cheapest but a bike shop is next best. Be sure to ask about fit or they'll just check it out mechanically. Similar newly-built bikes--they're fashionable now--cost many hundreds, so the shop will be money well spent.


Posted by: idp | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:25 PM
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I'm told somebody already fixed it up so far as running order goes. I'm trying to figure how old it is. Apparently, since it was made in Nottingham, it isn't the really old kind. That is, post 1960.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:34 PM
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132: Need to void a purchase contract?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:40 PM
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137: we already voided the contract (or so we thought), using our inspection contingency. We're now dealing with an irrational seller acting in bad faith. He hired a douchebag lawyer, who, surprise, is happy to bill a few hours and see if he can score a quick payoff. I'd like to hire someone who's extraordinarily competent and totally vicious.


Posted by: Den E. Crumb | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:47 PM
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Imagine a competent Halford.


Posted by: Den E. Crumb | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:48 PM
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I guess that asks too much of the reader.


Posted by: Den E. Crumb | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:48 PM
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My wife might know some one.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:53 PM
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Sorry. I don't know anybody who does that type of work.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 8:53 PM
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141: thanks. I've also been in touch with JRoth.


Posted by: Den E. Crumb | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:03 PM
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Competence isn't going to destroy Jupiter.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:04 PM
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Fair point. If I can hire someone sufficiently vicious -- planet-destroyingly vicious -- I guess I don't care if they're totally competent. Competent enough to destroy the target planet will do just fine, thanks.


Posted by: Den E. Crumb | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:10 PM
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He doesn't mention real estate, but this guy (poster here before) might have the right skills.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:36 PM
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posted not poster


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:36 PM
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Did I mention he's Jewish?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:37 PM
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And if you end up resorting extralegal measures, he's definitely your guy.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 04-24-14 9:38 PM
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My Jamaican co-worker knows a lot of guys. He also has a lot of stories about said guys fucking up/ripping him off/getting arrested/etc., with the result that he has to find new guys fairly often. I'm not sure I really trust his judgment on this.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 04-25-14 1:19 AM
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Utah really needs to start nailing some of these "midwives" to the wall.

Women naturally know how to give birth. Why use "doctors" or "science"!?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 04-25-14 11:27 AM
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