Re: Hi, I have way worse taste than I think I do

1

I would totes buy that bag.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:22 PM
horizontal rule
2

Still here I carry my old delicious burdens;
I carry them, men and women--I carry them with me wherever I go;
I swear it is impossible for me to get rid of them;
I am fill'd with them, and I will fill them in return


Posted by: Walt Whitman | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:24 PM
horizontal rule
3

That bag looks pretty flimsy to be carrying substantial books for any great length of time.


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:25 PM
horizontal rule
4

I do not believe you for an instant, Josh.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:26 PM
horizontal rule
5

...laydeez


Posted by: Walt Whitman | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:26 PM
horizontal rule
6

... and gentlemenz


Posted by: Walt Whitman | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:26 PM
horizontal rule
7

As a gift for his great friend and bibliophile, neb nosflow.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:28 PM
horizontal rule
8

Funny, I see that bag as catnip to ladies looking for a tortured poet sort of fellow (see also: sensitive, old soul). If that's your target demographic, I think you should carry on.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:31 PM
horizontal rule
9

AND THIS BITCH WAS ALL UP IN MY FACE ABOUT HOW BETTER THAN ME SHE IS WELL I SAY FUCK YOU POOPING IN YOUR BAG IS A REAL THING.


Posted by: OPINIONATED NPR SUBSCRIBER GIFT TOTE | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:32 PM
horizontal rule
10

Surely there are some ladies after sad young literary men who also have a modicum of taste or, failing that, shame? I mean who but a total caricature could possibly carry this bag?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:34 PM
horizontal rule
11

Tote bags and books only go together when you have dozens of books to return to the library and it's the day before you leave town and you need all available carriers that can hold books.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:34 PM
horizontal rule
12

I linked the piece in 10 having read only the title. It may actually suck.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:35 PM
horizontal rule
13

I think the trailing ellipsis on the text might actually be the worst part.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:36 PM
horizontal rule
14

so many beautiful things are being made invisible... like tears... in rain.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:46 PM
horizontal rule
15

10: I think if they had either good taste or shame, the sad literary young man would not be the object of their desires.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 3:59 PM
horizontal rule
16

Fair!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:01 PM
horizontal rule
17

so many beautiful things are being made invisible ... like the books ... inside this bag ... what I am carrying now


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:01 PM
horizontal rule
18

Jesus tote-bag-burning Christ.

I think it was Russell Baker who, via his charming Sunday column in the NYT mag, impressed upon a juvenile young Flippanter (who was really too young to read Baker and the On Language Safire of that or any era) that no matter where one might venture, no matter the volume of curious charm or forgotten lore, no woman would ever sidle up and ask "What's that big book, big boy?"

As I've related before, the only woman who ever struck up a conversation with me in a bookstore later tried to get me to join a cult.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:04 PM
horizontal rule
19

http://www.cafepress.com/+tote_bag,314924234


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:04 PM
horizontal rule
20

God bless 19.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:08 PM
horizontal rule
21

Has neb linked to a knock-off? $279. Even their URL is pretentious. This might actually be worse than all those kids being raped.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:09 PM
horizontal rule
22

An inevitable endpoint of this kind of carry on.


Posted by: Keir | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:11 PM
horizontal rule
23

OMG. This is the description:

We're pleased to introduce our signature bookbag, designed in collaboration with Ken Nishijo, a Tokyo based cabinet-maker and bag builder. A stunningly well-made bag that will age beautifully, this large tote's heavy-duty canvas is made on looms imported to Japan from Belgium in the 1930′s, and the nude leather handles come from one the oldest and best tanners in Tokyo. The remarkably precise stitching is all hand-done by Nishijo's own family in his workshop, and each bag carries our motto about book-carrying, hand screened on the inside:

Parody? MADE ON BELGIAN LOOMS IMPORTED INTO JAPAN IN THE 1930s PEOPLE. BELGIAN LOOMS.


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:12 PM
horizontal rule
24

21: Humanity is a failed experiment. Let the birds and beasts have a go at the world now.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:12 PM
horizontal rule
25

21: No, to the "simple" version.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:12 PM
horizontal rule
26

Is the one in 21 less objectionable because the text is hidden on the inside, or more objectionable because the text, being hidden, remains a private (smug!) satisfaction of the owner? Set aside all the other differences.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:14 PM
horizontal rule
27

no woman would ever sidle up and ask "What's that big book, big boy?"

As I have related before, this is not true.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:15 PM
horizontal rule
28

23 Belgian looms = product of brutal imperialism and exploitation of the proletariat. And Japan in the 1930s = militarism from hell.


Posted by: Keir | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:15 PM
horizontal rule
29

I would seriously consider the bag in 22 if it were not $80. Now I will stop serial commenting on my own post.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:16 PM
horizontal rule
30

You know what else was imported into Japan in the 1930s?


Posted by: Robert Halford | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:16 PM
horizontal rule
31

27: Declaring yourself sexier than Russell Baker is a bold stand, neb, but one I can respect.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:17 PM
horizontal rule
32

30: cotton, wool, iron, petroleum, soybeans, and wheat?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:18 PM
horizontal rule
33

23 is the most entertaining thing I've seen in weeks.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:19 PM
horizontal rule
34
I like to try to carry cars wherever I go but I pretty much fail because super heavy and made of metal

Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:38 PM
horizontal rule
35

GODDAMIT THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A HELL OF A LOT BETTER WITH THE LINE BREAKS HTML


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:38 PM
horizontal rule
36

tl;dr: I'm a twat.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:39 PM
horizontal rule
37

I note that Flippanter is remaining carefully silent on the topic of imported vintage loom obsession.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:40 PM
horizontal rule
38

36 to 35


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:40 PM
horizontal rule
39

37: [Whistling, ambling, nothing to see here.]


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 4:50 PM
horizontal rule
40

My book lunch bag has otters on it, and no poetry.


Posted by: DaveLMA | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:09 PM
horizontal rule
41

That bookstore also sells the world's most pretentious t-shirt, which has the titles of each of the Four Quartets written in a twee version of Ed Ruscha-style signmaker's lettering.

Its entire book inventory is, I think, about 20 books, artfully displayed. It also carries a handful of periodicals, including Kindling.

In short, the worst.


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:27 PM
horizontal rule
42

Is Kindling just bound sheets of wax-impregnated paper or something?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:29 PM
horizontal rule
43

Apparently not. That's too bad.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:29 PM
horizontal rule
44

Pretentious book tote.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:31 PM
horizontal rule
45

No longer available, sadly.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:35 PM
horizontal rule
46

The magazine seems to seek young, urban creative types, both as subjects and as readers. It is bound like a book and opens with an essay by Mr. Perez about his "desire to explicate the creative project that is fatherhood."


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:35 PM
horizontal rule
47

18: Yep!


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:37 PM
horizontal rule
48

I think Larkin offered the definitive explication of that particular creative project.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:38 PM
horizontal rule
49

"Now hold still while I explicate the creative project that is fatherhood on your face."


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:46 PM
horizontal rule
50

Actually, JP, it doesn't work that way.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:51 PM
horizontal rule
51

Kindling seems to be the happily ever after to the lady falling in love with the sad literary young man.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:54 PM
horizontal rule
52

47: Thanks! I loved Russell Baker.

Having typed that, I beg you all not to inform me of his vast investments in the munitions industry and racist propaganda.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 5:58 PM
horizontal rule
53

50: Teach me, o master nebi-wan.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 6:04 PM
horizontal rule
54

Your creative projection must be placed elsewhere.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 6:05 PM
horizontal rule
55

41.1 - Would it be better or worse if it were done in Helvetica a la the 2K⁄Gingham Beatles shirt?

Burnt Norton &
East Coker &
The Dry Salvages &
Little Gidding.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 6:16 PM
horizontal rule
56

The student creatively projected elsewhere and was enlightened.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 6:26 PM
horizontal rule
57

By 3.2 +/- 1.4 grams.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 6:27 PM
horizontal rule
58

"This tow truck is taking forever to get here!" Tom ejaculated.


Posted by: k-sky | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 6:29 PM
horizontal rule
59

"Tow truck? Hell, help me find my keys and we'll drive out of here!"


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 6:34 PM
horizontal rule
60

That store is genuinely hilarious and awful. They should open a joint venture with the East Bay Creative Reuse Depot down the street and have like 20 little bits of yarn and paper towel tubes, each on its own shelf, each for $30.


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 9:33 PM
horizontal rule
61

Let's say you want to do your own a Cornell Box and yet all you have to bring to the table is disposable income? Should there not be a trade to cater to such a person?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 9:40 PM
horizontal rule
62

God dammit, they told me that by now we would be getting our own fake Cornell boxes built for us by insane robots in derelict space stations.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 11:13 PM
horizontal rule
63

61, 62: would you settle for a nice teapot?


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 11:17 PM
horizontal rule
64

A teapot crafted by a self aware AI formerly the property of adodgy Eurotrash industrial dynasty?


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 11:33 PM
horizontal rule
65

I guess there's an actual teapot, but not in Utah.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 09- 4-14 11:35 PM
horizontal rule
66

62, 64: Remains my favorite, as it was the first one I read, back when I was 16 or so.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 1:35 AM
horizontal rule
67

66: comity.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 1:38 AM
horizontal rule
68

It sits open on the floor like a box, but is so balanced and perfectly constructed that it feels almost weightless (letting your books be the ballast, not your bag!).

In other words, it's a bag.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 2:37 AM
horizontal rule
69

But, you know, curated.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 3:06 AM
horizontal rule
70

If you are in a churning sea, the last thing you want is to have a bag full of ballast slung over your shoulder. What you want first of all is a boat.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 3:20 AM
horizontal rule
71

I can confirm neb is right in 27.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 5:54 AM
horizontal rule
72

I can't confirm 27, but I can confirm 70.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:08 AM
horizontal rule
73

That site is nuts, but strangely appealing. For god's sake don't buy the bookbag though.


Posted by: lemmy caution | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:39 AM
horizontal rule
74

Funny that Gibson should come up. I was thinking that 23 seems like the description of a bag Cayce Pollard would have, except for the text. I just started to re-read Pattern Recognition, but it was too annoying to go on with. WG is much better when he's straight up pulpy.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:42 AM
horizontal rule
75

74: I'm going to pick up Bleeding Edge now that it's in paperback. It occurs to me that Pynchon and Gibson seem to be converging in some weird way. Although I suppose Gibson will probably never include songs in his novels.


Posted by: AcademicLurker | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:49 AM
horizontal rule
76

It's more that Bleeding Edge is something of an intentional Gibson pastiche, in parts, I think.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:51 AM
horizontal rule
77

Also everything I know about imported vintage loom obsession is from Gibson, predictably.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:52 AM
horizontal rule
78

I think he's going back to the future in his next book. Hurray!


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:55 AM
horizontal rule
79

Yep.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 7:58 AM
horizontal rule
80

70: Ballast wouldn't be the last thing I wanted. It might be the second, to avoid being tipped out of my boat and clonked on the head by it.


Posted by: clew | Link to this comment | 09- 5-14 3:11 PM
horizontal rule