Re: Monkeytorture

1

Could 100 monkeys with their brains linked and a single typewriter produce Hamlet faster than a 100 separate monkeys each with their own typewriter?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 7:32 AM
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This is why you need two monkeys to pilot a kaiju-fighting mecha.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 7:33 AM
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Monkeys in Ethiopia are domesticating wolves! That's neat!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 7:51 AM
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Monkeys having monkeys...so sad.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 7:52 AM
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This research is really pretty rad, and hits exactly the sweet spot of "hard to explain to people outside the field why it's a good idea".


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 7:54 AM
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You had me at cruelty to monkeys.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 7:56 AM
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5: How hard is it to sell a unified-brain-pod world to the masses?!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:03 AM
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Uh oh, heebie's doing that mad-scientist-talking-to-herself thing again.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:04 AM
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The real profit is in selling financing for the purchase of unified-brain-pods by the masses.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:04 AM
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10

For centuries, man has yearned to yoke animal brains together.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:15 AM
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They tried rats and they tried monkeys, but have they tried rats and monkeys together? If so, would that be serial or parallel?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:20 AM
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12

This is actually slightly less disturbing than the experiment in which one monkey controls the body of another monkey via an implant. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-26224813

Also 2 was my first thought. I think the backstory of "Pacific Rim" is that mecha pilots tend to come from schools with strong marching-band traditions, which has accustomed them to synchronised movement.
Or possibly from the chorus lines of Broadway musicals. Now that's a film I would definitely watch. "We can save the world from alien monsters, but we're going to need to recruit the best chorus girls in New York to do it."


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:30 AM
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13

Uber, but for tightly coordinated thinking.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:32 AM
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14

Gold Diggers of 2033


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:32 AM
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"We need a tap-dancer, Gary, and they say you're the best."


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:37 AM
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Now that's a film I would definitely watch. "We can save the world from alien monsters, but we're going to need to recruit the best chorus girls in New York to do it."

Yess


Posted by: Turgid Jacobian | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:38 AM
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"We can save the world from alien monsters, but we're going to need to recruit the best chorus girls in New York who didn't have the fish for dinner to do it.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:44 AM
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18

Rockettes, assemble!


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:48 AM
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19

And their Robin, the synchronized swimming gals.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:51 AM
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18: I can see the toy soldier paint job on the mecha now.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:53 AM
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21

Or possibly figure-skating pairs.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:55 AM
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22

PACIFIC RENT


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 8:59 AM
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23

Finally, my childhood dream of a quilt of kittens is coming to fruition.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:00 AM
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It's too bad Roy Scheider's dead. He'd be perfect for the grizzled-veteran-general/drug-addicted choreographer-genius-reluctantly-pulled-out-of-retirement part this movie needs.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:01 AM
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What we're after is someone who's a cross between Aragorn and Bob Fosse. Not an easy role to fill.
Ed Harris?


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:04 AM
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26

Hugh Jackman?


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:07 AM
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Joel Grey


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:09 AM
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Good point. He has the musical-theatre background, though we might want someone a bit more grizzled.

Clint Eastwood! (He's done musicals. He did Paint Your Wagon!)


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:10 AM
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29

The apocalypse has never been so camp.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:10 AM
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30

If this sort of mecha technology becomes widespread, it's going to create a whole new set of military power centres. Broadway and the West End, obviously. North Korea (Arirang Mass Games). Bollywood. The Royal Ballet.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:13 AM
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29: Which brings to mind another take on the whole end-of-the-world thing. Something in the vein of Meatballs, and call it Camp Apocalypse.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:15 AM
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32

"It's not so much a battle wagon, more of a D'Oyly cart."


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:16 AM
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33

28.1: Maybe he's grizzled where it counts.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:16 AM
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34

All was foretold in Janet Jackson's Rhythm Nation.


Posted by: Roberto Tigre | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:19 AM
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35

12: "Bring It On, Kaiju".


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:23 AM
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36

30: Save that for the sequels. This ones all about the Battle for Broadway.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:26 AM
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37

Chorus girls, show tunes, Hugh Jackman, and giant robots punching monsters. I swear, there is not a demographic this film wouldn't appeal to.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:28 AM
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38

It has to be five robots that come together to form one big robot before I watch.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:29 AM
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39

That's the cheerleaders.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:30 AM
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It has to be five robots that come together to form one big robot before I watch.

That limits your cinema-going a bit.
"The Importance of Being Voltron".


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:32 AM
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41

So, now they can get "monkey see, monkey do" where the two monkeys are distinct?


Posted by: Calypsu | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:56 AM
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42

27: Heh. I typed Joel Grey and deleted for Hugh Jackman.

28: Wolverine! Super grizzled!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 9:59 AM
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43

If the brains are wired together, where do you draw the line between masturbation and sex?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:05 AM
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44

Can you masturbate to an uploaded mind?


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:11 AM
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45

38, 40 -- Wallace Shawn IN "My Dinner With Voltron"


Posted by: Roberto Tigre | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:11 AM
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46

Do androids dream of electric creeps?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:14 AM
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47

43 -- the real mindblower is that you could be simultaneously in a state of orgasm and "meh, when will this end."


Posted by: Roberto Tigre | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:14 AM
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48

Clint Eastwood! (He's done musicals. He did Paint Your Wagon!)

Can we somehow resurrect Lee Marvin for this film?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:16 AM
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49

PACIFIC RENT

South Pacific Rim, surely.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:19 AM
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50

49: of course, damn it.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:23 AM
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51

"I'm gonna wash that inter-brain linkage right off of my head."


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:28 AM
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52

Soon we shall achieve full realization of the Unfogged hive mind.

I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together.


Posted by: My Alter Ego | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:29 AM
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53

hits exactly the sweet spot of "hard to explain to people outside the field why it's a good idea"

Can you try?


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:36 AM
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54

I never understood why in Pacific Rim compatibility was tested with sparring and not, say, partner dancing.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:37 AM
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55

Wait, there are better ways of determining compatibility with a partner than shoving them? This explains so much.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 10:41 AM
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Partner dancing involves one person leading and the other following - so maybe there's a direct line of communication involved rather than both people acting autonomously? Fighting wouldn't have that feature so you'd get a more direct access to the way the other person reflexively thinks/behaves, which is what you'd want to know if you're going to cooperatively punch monsters or something.


Posted by: MHPH | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 11:05 AM
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57

54: Strictly Voltron.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 11:07 AM
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58

43/47: strictly come together


Posted by: Nworb Werdna | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 11:37 AM
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59

Right now!


Posted by: Nworb Werdna | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 11:38 AM
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60

OVER ME


Posted by: Opinionated Kinky Brain Scientist | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 11:39 AM
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I'm looking forward to the spinoff with drum line and step teams, and the hiphop/ballet couple that embody the perfect balance of technique and improvisation. Love those movies. Can't beat South Pacific Rim as a title, though.


Posted by: clew | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 3:23 PM
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62

Wouldn't Irish dancing be an inevitable weapon here?


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 4:03 PM
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63

I think you know where Irish dancing is an inevitable weapon.


Posted by: Mr. Blandings | Link to this comment | 07-14-15 5:18 PM
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64

||

I'm not sure but I think I've just been on a date. A cow-orker (in another unit who works in another building) invited me over to her place to see her etchings movie collection as we are both more or less self-described cinephiles. When I met her at a local professional social thing we both talked non-stop about films we love and she extended a general invite to come over to see her DVD collection some time. I was definitely attracted to her then but didn't think anything would ever come of it but she was sincere in the invitation she made then as she texted me the other day and invited me to come over. So I went over and it was very nice, I got a tour of her place which is amazing (she's senior to me, not that I'm complaining about my accommodation but hers, wow) and that includes her bedroom (no euphemism intended) and all the closets and stuff and then we talked and talked about travel and families, hers in Lebanon and mine in NY, and our life histories and how much we like living in cities and other stuff and then when we looked at her collection, well, there were some moments there when she mentioned how much this or that movie had a lot of sex in it and whether it was a good or disappointing film and when I suggested that if she liked the kind of thing delved into in this ultimately disappointing movie she might find another one in the same vein much better and hotter at which point she said oh I know and fanned herself. She also had some sexy photography books that she made sure I saw what they were. Then we went back to the couch and she showed me some photo albums of her family and we talked more about family and life history and travelling. Nothing happened but I don't know what to think or expect. Or what to do next to make something happen in the future without messing it up. But wow. She's captivating and smart and beautiful and alluring and just everything. She's going on leave in a few days and I've invited her to this great art exhibition/movie thing I'm going to with other colleagues tomorrow. She definitely expressed interest in having me over again sometime after she gets back. Wow. Wow. Wow.

Sorry for the rambling and incoherence but my head is still spinning and it's been a very long time.

(This is about as thinly presidential a pseud as I can think of. Also my diet starts in earnest tonight.)

|>


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 11:52 AM
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65

Yay!


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 11:59 AM
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66

Yes, that's a date, and with regard to your last statement, diet if you like, but note that she hit on you at your current weight, so you shouldn't be thinking of dieting as dating-related.

Also, be careful about spawning abominations. (Was that it? Something bad happens when you combine spice with pregnancy?)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 11:59 AM
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67

66.1 is what I was about to say.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:01 PM
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68

Unless you think she'd have skipped the family pictures and tossed you into bed if you were five pounds lighter.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:03 PM
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69

There, the question is whether Paul should be dieting, or encouraging Chani to do some strength training for increased tossing capacity.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:05 PM
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70

66.2: I don't know why I can't kill the brain cells that remember this, but it wasn't spice that lead to abomination, it was the fetus being in the womb during the Reverend Mother ceremony, a ceremony which involved the "water of life." Not the spice and nothing at all to do with the conception.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:06 PM
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71

I'm too dense to figure out who you are, but yay! Keep us posted! Can we call her Moviey?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:08 PM
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Not too dense to look up your IP address! And then I felt dumb.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:09 PM
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73

Don't mix the metaphors. If he's Paul Atreides, she's got to be Chani. </nerd>

(Oh, who am I kidding. The nerd tag stays on. <nerd>.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:10 PM
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Well if 66.1 and 67 then woohoo! I'm still not sure how to proceed and part of me is telling myself that she's just very Lebanese/French. But now that I think of it there were other openings for me to suggest activities - I don't mean sexual ones - but her saying how much as a person she loves to go out and do things but that her flat is so nice and comfy (and it is) that she's just inclined to stay in and read and watch movies instead. I suppose next time I can suggest we do some activity out on the town together. Help me out here Mineshaft!


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:11 PM
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75

I like Chani.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:13 PM
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76

73.1: Or Irulian, if her father is forcing her to date him.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:13 PM
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77

75: That was kind of obvious. But do you like-like her?


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:14 PM
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77 Why yes. Yes I don.

69 She tangos.

Not sure how to proceed. I mean there might be the thing tomorrow night with other people, which I think is good and then she's on leave for a month.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:18 PM
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Movies sound like the easy play -- anything interesting playing that you have access to, you should ask her for. Or photography exhibitions, if there's anything. But I don't have much of a sense of what you've got available locally.

On the "is she hitting on you or just French" question, hard to say conclusively from here (although it sounds like hitting on you), but I think a date-type-date should clarify. Bite the bullet and say something that unambiguously indicates that you're on a romantic-type date, and she'll either be on the same page with you, so you'll know, or will straighten things out.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:18 PM
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80

....which is also good. And when she gets back? Help me out here Mentatshaft.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:19 PM
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81

"is she hitting on you or just French"

This is the counterpart to "Does he want to kill me or is he just German."


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:21 PM
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82

76: It should be Irulan without the superfluous i.


Posted by: Tiny Hermaphrodite, Esq. | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:22 PM
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83

Obviously, you should not show Chani your chrysknife unless you put it away blooded.... er.


Posted by: Turgid Jacobian | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:22 PM
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84

81: It's nearly always both.


Posted by: Tiny Hermaphrodite, Esq. | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:23 PM
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85

80: "How about instead of watching a movie we make one?"


Posted by: MHPH | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:24 PM
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86

64: Bow chicka wow wow, wow wow.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:30 PM
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87

85: That didn't work well for anybody who was dating Madonna.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:31 PM
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88

78.1 s/b Yes I do.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 12:34 PM
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89

78.last: Things with other people end long before dawn. Come up with a post-thing contingency plan. Bring a copy of 50 Shades of Grey and tell her with a wink that your DVD player is broken and could you borrow hers.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 1:23 PM
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90

re: 62

A former flatmate of mine was world Irish dancing runner-up, or something. Maybe third. He claimed he was robbed, and that only Irish people ever won it. Scouser who came from an Irish family who were big into that sort of thing. He ended up touring Australia or somewhere as part of a Riverdance knock-off show, and got royally ripped off by the promoter.

Anyway, one night we all came back to the flat pissed as farts, and someone persuaded him to put his shoes on and show off in our kitchen. Barely 20 seconds in (drunk as a lord) he booted one of our other flatmates in the mouth and burst his lip. So, Irish dancing is definitely deadly.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 1:38 PM
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91

Also, definitely hitting on you, Paul.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 1:40 PM
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92

My impression, partially from personal experience and partially from conversations here is that there is no "Is she hitting on you or just French." If she's French, and you think she's hitting on you, then she's hitting on you.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 1:49 PM
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93

Also, definitely hitting on you, Paul.

And in that French way that resembles Irish step dancing. Watch out for your lip.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 1:51 PM
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94

Come to think, if you can end the upcoming event alone together, I think the timing's good for some light smooching or at least hand-holding with intent. Assuming (as we all are) that such is her intent, it means that she has the month away to be looking forward to seeing you again, knowing that you're interested. And if we're all wrong, and she pulls away, saying indignantly "I wasn't hitting on you, I'm just French," she'll be away for a month to get over the awkwardness, which might make it easier to transition to being platonic movie buddies.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:01 PM
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95

Of course we'll expect a thorough debriefing.

[Dies laughing.]


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:03 PM
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96

Come to think, if you need advice, Paul, you should look back at all the Lunchy threads. There's gold in there.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:08 PM
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97

if she liked the kind of thing delved into in this ultimately disappointing movie she might find another one in the same vein much better and hotter at which point she said oh I know and fanned herself.

Nu, what's this movie?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:12 PM
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98

94 is what I was getting at in 89. Paul should have an excuse ready to spend a little alone time with her. Needing a ride home would work really well.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:28 PM
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99

"Can we stop at your place? I have really bad diarrhea and don't know if I'll make it home."


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:31 PM
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100

Right, I meant to chime in in support of your suggestion.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:31 PM
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101

100 to 99.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:33 PM
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102

And in that French way that resembles Irish step dancing. Watch out for your lip.

For it may soon have another's lip upon it! honh honh honh!!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:33 PM
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103

Paul, hooray! It does sound like a protodate! I hope the follow ups are fun.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:40 PM
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104

Well, she's Lebanese but with dual French citizenship and lived in Paris for many years.

97 Secretary, YMMV. I think you can guess what the other disappointing movie was.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:43 PM
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105

103 Oh no, I appreciate the words of encouragement but now it sounds like it's been downgraded from a date to a protodate!


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:47 PM
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106

I can. I confess to having been really turned off (aesthetically, but somehow I couldn't resist saying "been turned off" instead just "disliked" or including this ridiculous explanatory parenthesis) by Secretary, mostly in its depiction of Maggie Gyllenhaal's character's character.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:47 PM
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107

She's totally into you, Paul. Don't back down now. Remember: fear is the mind-killer.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:48 PM
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108

s/instead/instead of/


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 2:48 PM
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109

And in that French way that resembles Irish step dancing. Watch out for your lip.

The Weirding Way.


Posted by: Turgid Jacobian | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:03 PM
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110

107.last should be to this.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:03 PM
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111

Hm: "fear is the little death that kills me over and over."

Maybe you should embrace fear? Remember: your name is an arousing word.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:11 PM
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106: That's what made Secretary interesting, challenging and good for me, though not at all erotic. Weren't no role-playing goin' on there, there is a very strong element of ordinariness and just folks that is not found in Night Porter or Oshima or others and the challenge for the audience (and maybe Spader) was can we accept this "damaged" woman for what she is and what she wants, or do we recoil and say "this chick needs therapy like now."

What I didn't like was that MG and the director subverts this message with a final shot of MG breaking character, the fourth wall, and winking at us.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:20 PM
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113

Right on Paul! Fabulous news, I am on team date. Woo hop!


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:25 PM
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114

105: Don't listen to me, of all people. I don't believe I've ever been on a date of the kind proposed here, where people go out to get to know each other better and gauge their interest levels. I was asked once and said yes as long as we were jay going as friends, though a no would have been kinder. I just figured a date implies knowledge and consent on both sides, but I wouldn't know!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:39 PM
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115

I found the fact that MG's character was evidently a psychological (cutting herself, etc.) and social (evidently unable to negotiate the world at all succesfully on her own) mess until she just happened to meet someone appropriately stern highly off-putting.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:40 PM
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116

I think you can guess what the other disappointing movie was.

Bound?


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:49 PM
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117

115: I was just really creeped out by her carving down the ballerina's foot to be able to cut with it. There has just GOT to be a better way.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:50 PM
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118

117: I do not remember that!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:51 PM
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119

116: In the Realm of the Senses, clearly.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:51 PM
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120

Holy shit, good work Usul. I'm not going to give you any advice because frankly that would be like taking ballet advice from Stephen Hawking, but I hope it goes really well. If the conversation falters, can I be the first to suggest telling her of the Fresh Salt of your home world.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:53 PM
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118: Sorry if I'm being insensitive to any friends' fetishes, but something about the idea of using that sort of decorative ceramic as a weapon turns my stomach even now, way more than the thought of having to get into this dating thing eventually myself.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 3:58 PM
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122

121: I think we all agree with your assessment of the relative nauseatingness of self harm with a ceramic ballerina vs. dating.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 4:58 PM
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123

Sniffing used ballerina shoes is somewhere in the middle.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 5:06 PM
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The smelliness of ballet kit - yikes. Dance kit in general.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 5:19 PM
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Maybe lightly used shoes command a premium over well used. I don't know the market as well as some.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 5:26 PM
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Yay Paul! I have a potential opportunity of my own that I should probably pursue...


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 10:03 PM
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Yay, Paul and yay, teo.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 11:35 PM
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Paul, this sounds great! It is also possible that there are few new arrivals in Arrakis, so you appear to here as someone who may add a certain spice to the dating pool.


Posted by: NW | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 11:46 PM
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126: WAIT, is she in your apartment right now high on meth?


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 07-15-15 11:59 PM
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No. She's classier than that.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:01 AM
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She is Native, though.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:02 AM
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YES. Dude, natives get crazy access to hunting permits. This might be your chance to spear a narwhal.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:10 AM
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Nah, she's Athabascan, from the Interior. They're more about moose. (And we don't have narwhals in Alaska anyway.)


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:14 AM
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Let's face it, spearing a large mammal from the sea is mostly about bragging rights, because sea mammals taste like shit. But your wild land mammals can be a whole different story.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:19 AM
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Do moose taste good? Elk taste good, but I assumed moose were stringy or something.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:23 AM
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134: I admit that I've never eaten sea mammal meat per se; I hear it tastes like fish. I have had muktuk, though. It's pretty gross raw but not bad pan-fried. As a landlubber I prefer terrestrial megafauna, though.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:25 AM
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135: I've only had dried moose (like jerky), but yes, I thought it was pretty good, certainly better than caribou, not that that means much to anyone else. I wouldn't think it's any stringier than elk.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:27 AM
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Huh, interesting. I remember having reindeer sausage on a trip to Alaska, and I assumed it was one of those meats that did a lot better with added fat. Now I'm curious to try all sorts of big deer-like mammals.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:35 AM
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Moose are a lot bigger than reindeer/caribou, and probably fattier. Reindeer and caribou are also somewhat different, despite being the same species, since reindeer are domesticated and caribou are wild. The reindeer sausage that you buy commercially also tends to be mixed with varying amounts of beef. It has a distinctive taste, but it's not really the same as eating strait reindeer or caribou.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:41 AM
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Elk IS Moose.
Reindeer fillet is extraordinarily good; other reindeer meat I find boring.


Posted by: NW | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 12:54 AM
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Elk IS Moose.

Not in America, it isn't.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:00 AM
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someone who may add a certain spice to the dating pool.

I see what you did there.

This might be your chance to spear a narwhal.

Not necessarily. She might well be quite slim.

141:
EUROPE/ North America
REINDEER / caribou (big, furry horns)
ELK / moose (huge, silly nose)
WAPITI / elk (very similar to the European red deer, but a different species)


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:25 AM
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Okay, I just sent her a FB message suggesting drinks after work sometime next week.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:29 AM
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Inspired in part by this thread, and in part by the gin I've been drinking. (And in part by the gin that I assume gswift has been drinking.)


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:30 AM
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142.3 is correct, except that we do also have domesticated reindeer in the US (specifically Alaska), imported from Europe (specifically Lapland).


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:32 AM
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134: I am curious to know how gswift knows what sea mammals taste like. There aren't many I can think of that are generally legal to eat. Seal, whale, dolphin, sea lion, porpoise, walrus, sea otter? Porpoise at least was a mediaeval luxury so it can't be that bad.

Though my grandmother assured me that whale (available off ration) was horrible.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:33 AM
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145: same species, but different subspecies, presumably? Do you also have domesticated caribou? Or does any domesticated caribou automatically become a reindeer?


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:36 AM
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Yes, different subspecies. And no, none of the caribou subspecies have been domesticated. All of the domesticated reindeer in North America are descended from Eurasian subspecies AFAIK.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:38 AM
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136: I've never knowingly eaten whale, but AIMHMHB my kids said the fried whale cutlets they were served for school lunch a couple of times were delicious. Friends say it's more like chewy beef than anything else, with a slightly fishy aftertaste. The whale steaks sold in the local supermarket were smooth-textured, very dark red meat that looked a bit like venison, but you could also buy thick strips of white blubber and whale bacon (which I've heard is good).


Posted by: Ume | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:43 AM
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Muktuk is the blubber and skin, without any meat. The kind I had was bowhead, on the North Slope, but further south they also make it from belugas. It's illegal to buy or sell marine mammal parts (except traditional arts and crafts made from bone, ivory, or baleen) in the US, but it's legal to give away other parts from marine mammals harvested for subsistence, which is how I acquired the muktuk.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:56 AM
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Ah. So a NA elk is a Wapiti? Because in Sweden "moose" is just a rebranding of what all sensible people know is an elk. Are there any caribou in Eurasia? Or is it only the domesticated subspecies that's found here?


Posted by: NW | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 2:25 AM
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Yes, the species Cervus canadensis is known in North America as "elk," while the term "wapiti" is used by Europeans for the Eurasian subspecies because Europeans use "elk" for Alces alces, which is known in North America by the term "moose." The species Rangifer tarandus appears to be referred to as "reindeer" throughout Eurasia (per Wikipedia), although there are both wild and domesticated herds. In North America wild populations of the same species are known as "caribou" and domesticated populations, introduced from Eurasia, are known as "reindeer." There has been some overlap between the two with domesticated reindeer herds in some parts of Alaska joining wild caribou herds at times over the past hundred years or so, with devastating consequences for the reindeer herding industry.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 2:42 AM
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149 "Whale bacon"? I'm a vegetarian for over 15 years now but even I thnk it's a wonder they're not all extinct.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 2:44 AM
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The terms in 152 are all in English, so "Europeans" should be read as "Britons," I guess. I know nothing about the terminology in other European languages.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 2:45 AM
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142 et seq.:
Scotland: MOOSE (wee, sleekit).


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 4:18 AM
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Ok, she texted me that she would much rather go to the art exhibition/movie thing tomorrow which means that it would be just with me and not the 2 other cow-orkers there. She used a lot of exclamation points after my name and after each sentence.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 4:57 AM
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I would take that as a good sign. But you knew that.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 4:59 AM
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Scotland: MOOSE (wee, sleekit).

(loose, about the house)


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 5:00 AM
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156. OK, you're on, in case you hadn't noticed. Do you in fact want a relationship with this woman, think on? Because if you want to pull back you have to do it now.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 5:02 AM
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157 I know. But I just need a little hand holding until the, uh, hand holding.

Very enthusiastic reply to my reply too. Almost thought to send a :-) back but I think I'll refrain.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 5:03 AM
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159 Yes, very much so. And it's not just because it's been a while. She's very dynamic and interesting and fun and someone I think would cause me to stretch myself and be a better, fuller person, if that makes sense. Someone I'd have thought was out of my league in times recently past though I suppose that's crazy talk. Also one of the sexiest accents/voices I've ever heard. Wheeee! Or should I say, "Muad'Dib!"


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 5:09 AM
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Yay for teo too. Though it will be hard to top a cooler moniker than "boss niece."


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 5:31 AM
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someone I think would cause me to stretch myself and be a better, fuller person, if that makes sense.

Per 64.last, she in fact seems to be causing you to shrink yourself and be a better, emptier person...


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 5:48 AM
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There's a 36% chance that anybody who uses more than six exclamation points in a text will become a serial killer at some point in his or her life.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:17 AM
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Those are good odds.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:19 AM
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Sure, if your the monogamous type. If you play the field, pretty soon they start to add up into something risky.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:22 AM
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Moose is delicious. There's a yak farm up in the Flathead, and I've been meaning to try some.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:23 AM
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More worryingly, there's a 17% chance that imaginary statistics you pull out of your arse are in fact true.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:24 AM
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165: Also a lot of serial killers keep it completely separate from their regular life, so you have to figure the odds of it becoming an issue for Paul are lower than the 36%.


Posted by: widget | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:26 AM
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169: with the exception of George Joseph Smith and his Brides in the Bath. (Which would be an ironic way to die in Arrakis.)


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:28 AM
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Good point. Going away "on leave" for a month would be a great way to handle that.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:29 AM
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All Paul needs to worry about is becoming a victim of one of the many serial killers he isn't going out with, and he doesn't have to worry about that any more now than he already was.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:39 AM
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Less, in fact, because if you aren't going out with anyone then you have to worry about x serial killers, but if you're going out with a serial killer you only have to worry about the x-1 others.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:42 AM
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Scotland: MOOSE (wee, sleekit).

I still think of that thread occasionally and crack up.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 7:39 AM
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I have never in my life heard the word "wapiti" before this thread.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 7:46 AM
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I thought it was a joke before looking at Wikipedia.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 7:49 AM
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I knew it because of the Westland Wapiti before I learned what the actual animal was, or even that there was one.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 8:00 AM
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I thought it was just one of those things about British humor that I didn't get, like Are You Being Served?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 8:02 AM
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Come to our natural history musuem, Mobes! Wapiti stuff out the wazoo.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:01 AM
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If it's just a elk, so does ours. I just mostly see the dinosaurs these days.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:09 AM
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163: The hope is that she'll stretch him out in some places and shrink him in others.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:14 AM
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(And in part by the gin that I assume gswift has been drinking.)

Ha, Bombay Sapphire, bitches. I'm on a Thurs-Sat off schedule these days so there's really no reason not to drink on a Wednesday night.

I am curious to know how gswift knows what sea mammals taste like.

I've never actually had any first hand but various friends and acquaintances who've tried whale and seal and such have all been of the opinion that it was something they'd eat to survive but never seek out. And who knows, maybe porpoise or narwhal is amazing but I'm doubtful any mammal who's primary diet is fishy creatures is going to taste all that great.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:18 AM
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My cow-orker who ate whale when he was in Japan reported that it tasted like the best steak he'd ever had in his life.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:20 AM
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181 is an interesting cross between a Cosmo article and the story of Procrustes.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:21 AM
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I knew it because of the Westland Wapiti before I learned what the actual animal was, or even that there was one.

You must have encountered the Westland Wapiti at a very tender age, since I recall seeing a tone of the rather boring animals in the zoo many times before I started kindergarten.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:38 AM
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The point of 185 being that if you were taken to any zoo as a kid the one thing you could guarantee seeing was bloody wapitis.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:39 AM
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I ate wind-dried whale once in Iceland and it wasn't great. I've never had seal but apparently according to some show I watched it's widely available in gourmet preparations in Newfoundland.


Posted by: Roberto Tigre | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:48 AM
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185: I don't think we had wapiti in the zoo near where I grew up, because red deer (very similar) were terribly common in the wild anyway. It would have been like having sheep in a zoo.
And the zoo now has an online search engine which confirms that, yes, still no wapiti.

And I did encounter the Westland Wapiti pretty young, via Clive King.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 9:56 AM
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160: I'm told by a younger friend that emoticons unambiguously indicate flirtation. Next time!


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:00 AM
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189: either this is utterly wrong or else the Bloomberg chat transcripts of conspiring dishonest securities traders which I have been looking at over the last few months have got an entire level of subtext which I have been completely missing.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:08 AM
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Come back to my place and I'll show you my bond ratings :)


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:11 AM
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She said yes to drinks next week. Seems promising.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:39 AM
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No emoticons, though.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:39 AM
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I think emoticon use between people who might plausibly be flirting is flirtatious, but it isn't always flirtatious in all contexts, so we can't really be certain about the securities traders without more details.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:44 AM
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if you're going out with a serial killer you only have to worry about the x-1 others.

From which it follows that, in order to maximize your safety, you should endeavor to be simultaneously dating as many serial killers as possible.


Posted by: AcademicLurker | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:50 AM
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I think Emerson would appreciate that the thread titled "monkeytorture" became the dating thread.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:54 AM
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189: either this is utterly wrong or else the Bloomberg chat transcripts of conspiring dishonest securities traders which I have been looking at over the last few months have got an entire level of subtext which I have been completely missing.

"Done...for you, big boy" was too subtle?


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 11:00 AM
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From 193 we deduce that teo is going on a date with a Native Alaskan serial killer who is not active in the interbank lending markets.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 11:20 AM
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The desert museum outside Tucson has big horn sheep in it. I was underwhelmed by the whole thing, especially the nervously pacing mountain lion in the "exhibit" named after Barry Goldwater. Zoos are so yucky.

Some amazing textiles at an exhibit in the Amerind museum tho, highly recommend.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:11 PM
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196 There was some low fruit there and I'm surprised no one has picked it.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 1:57 PM
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198: Hey now, she only used one exclamation point in her whole message.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 6:56 PM
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I might be late to this but Paul, your only problem at this point is that she thinks you might not be interested because you didn't jump her despite her sending every signal she had that she was interested.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 7:02 PM
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Update: We just made arrangements for Wednesday after work at a locally famous dive bar downtown.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:11 PM
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Tell her you're said about that census district getting renamed.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:40 PM
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I'm said what about it, though?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 10:47 PM
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that was supposed to be sad, not said


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 11:01 PM
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Indeed.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-16-15 11:16 PM
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OK, the art exhibition/movie thing is out because it's closed for the holiday but I suggested this Eid fireworks display and she said yes and then proposed we meet tonight by the seaside near where the fireworks will be. It's too bad that PDAs really unacceptable here because anywhere else I'd take that as a chance to kiss her. Should I bring anything?

202 Noted.

200. The days of monkey torture may soon be at an end. (I can't believe I had to pick that fruit myself).


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 3:37 AM
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Should I bring anything?

Condoms.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 4:25 AM
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Possibly a toothbrush.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 4:45 AM
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188: No wapiti in Dublin Zoo either, because it's inside a park which has its own herd of fallow deer.


Posted by: emir | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 4:50 AM
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Don't bring her a wapiti. Not this early in the relationship anyway.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:08 AM
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I do love those old Victorian books on The Language Of Ungulates. It was a simpler time, when people would puzzle over whether their relationship had progressed to the point that warranted the simple gift of a yak.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:15 AM
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209 Pretty hard to get on Eid in this country though I did see them in a Carrefour the other week.

210 in the bag.

I spent the last hour cleaning my apartment in case we end up here.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:44 AM
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212 I would only bring her a wapiti I had killed and dressed myself.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:50 AM
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Yay! Be the PDA you wish to see in your apartment.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:50 AM
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Moving fast. Nice one.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:51 AM
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I would be entirely behind a cryptic system of describing the success of dates by means of ungulates. All the way from, say, duiker or muntjac ("she said she'd had a lovely evening") through impala (kiss goodnight) and wapiti (coffee at my apartment) and so on.
At the top, obviously, wildebeeste.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:53 AM
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215: A wapiti looks best in something flowing, with simple lines.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:56 AM
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218. What about Cape Buffalo?


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 5:58 AM
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Perv.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:00 AM
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215: definitely don't show up to meet her with a dead deer. You aren't dating gswift for heaven's sake.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:01 AM
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Let's not even talk about pudu fanciers.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:02 AM
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Let's not even talk about pudu fanciers.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:02 AM
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Well it kind of started with wapiti. Vicuña would be nice but I'd be fine with an impala.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:08 AM
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It's too bad that PDAs really unacceptable here because anywhere else I'd take that as a chance to kiss her. Should I bring anything?

Definitely not a Palm Pilot or a Psion.

I would be entirely behind a cryptic system of describing the success of dates by means of ungulates. All the way from, say, duiker or muntjac ("she said she'd had a lovely evening") through impala (kiss goodnight) and wapiti (coffee at my apartment) and so on.

The inevitable whales-are-ungulates war will make the avian-dinosaur war to shame.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:12 AM
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None of you people had that Rutherford Montgomery book as children? I think we already established that no one else had Robert McClung's Shag either, which makes me wonder what were your parents thinking, anyway.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:13 AM
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If I have the time difference right, it is now 9 pm and Date Night in Arrakis.

Barry, if you're reading this, I just wanted to say good luck. We're all counting on you.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:03 AM
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Discretion is your middle name.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:05 AM
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That ship sailed in 225. But if it's a problem maybe a frontpager can redact the names in both?


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:09 AM
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228 It's 7 actually. And who's this Barry fellow?


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:11 AM
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230 yes please. (maybe 231 too).


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:12 AM
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Oh, only 7? My mistake. Well, good luck to you Paul.

I don't know what Barry might be up to this evening at all, but whatever it is, I hope it goes well!


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:13 AM
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Sorry for the name thing. Inattention on my part.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:14 AM
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Barry's torturing the monkey. Maybe Paul's new gf could introduce him to someone.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:41 AM
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Ha! So it's a fixture of childhood in Britain that every zoo you go to contains North American elk under the pseudo-exotic name "wapiti". Brilliant.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:46 AM
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Re: earlier upthread, AIMHMHB, I had both moose and caribou at a solstice barbecue where the Dempster Highway crosses the Arctic Circle. Everyone had burgers while drinking cases of beer, and then a guy from the Yukon transportation department broke out the pot. No one felt like packing up in the wee hours when they went back to their lodge, and my biking companion and I passed out in our tent a few yards away from large trays of meat on the Grizzly-infested tundra. Not one of the smarter things I've done. The meat was pretty good, though.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:57 AM
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whether their relationship had progressed to the point that warranted the simple gift of a yak.

Simple? Given how elaborately shaved any yak intended as a gift ought to be?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 10:01 AM
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238: There's a shaggy dog story with "You carry the man who shaved new yak" as a punchline that begs to be written, but it's even too stupid for me. (Maybe such unrealized stories should be known an as unshaggy yak stories.)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 11:49 AM
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Or just shaggy yak stories I guess.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 11:49 AM
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This thread is sorely lacking in updates, but Eid Mubarak anyhow, Paul.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:43 PM
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I think the lack of updates is probably a good sign, actually.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 6:54 PM
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What's update?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 7:15 PM
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239 is deep cut for the gothamites,


Posted by: JP Stormcrow9 | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 7:20 PM
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Oh nosflow, surely someday someone will love you for your sense of humor.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 7:24 PM
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JP Stormcrow9

Do pseud clones dream of eclectic peeps?


Posted by: JP Stromcrow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 7:27 PM
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245: then who would be updating whom?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 7:31 PM
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update

1) Date a better.
2) date that ends on a high note.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 7:33 PM
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No one could love me for only one thing, Thorn.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 7:40 PM
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As if that were her claim.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 8:00 PM
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Don't let's be mean.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 8:12 PM
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Both pits have dyed hair.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 8:15 PM
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Surely we can all agree that, whatever name you call it, it's definitely more entertaining that Tycho Brahe's pet was a moose-elk rather than an elk-wapiti.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 8:32 PM
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whatever name you call it

The name I call it is "Haddock's Eyes".


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 8:38 PM
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Back when I was a weird kid who said random things, instead of basically the same person but older now, I sometimes claimed I had a hobby of "strategic yak hair collecting." When people found out that I was not in the possession of any yak hair, I'd explain that was a result of my strategy.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-17-15 9:24 PM
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Either the date went really well or Chani actually is a serial killer or both.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 1:02 AM
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74, 79.2 Hélas. As it turns out, she's just very French as I feared. As is her boyfriend of a year.

I got home really late as the fireworks display didn't start till after 10 then we stayed and talked at this neat outdoor Turkish cafe/restaurant. When we left 11:30 the walk to her car took a while (I took a car service there but she dropped me home) and traffic was terrible getting out of there so I didn't get home till close to 1 AM I think. I popped the question about a further date type date when we arrived at my apartment building (and asked her up though even if she'd been game I think the answer would have been no or another time as she was feeling tired - we had walked a lot and it was very hot out). That's when she told me her status: that she was in a relationship with someone, a perfidious Frenchman (not her words), and had been for about a year. But she found me very interesting and liked my company as with colleagues X and Y. Now of course, there are the small doubts that niggle and swirl at the back of the mind that maybe the French boyfriend is actually Québécois (IYKWIM AITYD) and it's something I said but I think that's on balance incorrect and I'll choose to take her at her word.


So please, laydeez of Sietch Tabr*, I implore you: next time, no tours of the boudoir and bedroom closets filled with sexy underthings, talk of sexy books and movies, or text messages replying "Perfect!!!I am ready" to proposed plans to go out or the like unless you intend to jump on my bones sometime in the near future.

Current plans include binge watching BtVS and listening to all of Joy Division's recorded catalog at least 5 times through. And chocolate. But not too much. I'm still on my diet.

*Sorry to have wasted such a cool nickname as "Chani," hopefully there will be another and I'll call this one "Moviey"as per heebie's suggestion above.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 2:14 AM
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My sympathies. Friends are good to have, too, though, especially after moving to a new country.


Posted by: x.trapnel | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 4:29 AM
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Oh, hell. Bad luck Paul.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 4:52 AM
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Thanks.

257.3 is inartfully worded, it should read something like: no tours of the boudoir and bedroom closets filled with sexy underthings while talking of sexy books and movies and text messaging "Perfect!!!I am ready"...

Nothing wrong with with talking about sexy books and movies among friends, it's just all those things in rapid succession taken together. Le sigh.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:00 AM
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Drat. But trapnel's right -- you've at least got a friend who likes movies, and she'll be away for a month to let the awkwardness pass off.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:01 AM
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Oh crap. Sorry about the crossed wires, Paul. That sucks.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:02 AM
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And at least it all got straightened out pretty briskly -- think of how lousy it would have been if you hadn't had the guts to make an unambiguous move last night. The timing would have left you in doubt for weeks.

Someone else will come along, and remember that faint heart ne'er won fair Fremen.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:07 AM
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Knowing is better than not knowing, sure, but what a letdown! Like everyone else, I'm glad you had a good night and have found a friend.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:48 AM
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So you see, guys, there's no way of knowing if there are "signals" that you are "picking up".


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 6:33 AM
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Based on your description, it sounds like she got swept up in the moment, and calmed down later. If she really has a boyfriend, then maybe it's for the best.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 6:46 AM
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265: Sure there's a way. Raising the question in words, like Barry did. There's no way to communicate completely unambiguously without using language, but we don't have to.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:01 AM
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Condolences, bro. Plenty of fish in the sea, bro. Fist bump!


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:14 AM
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266 is what I'd go with. You're just so damn sexy she had a moment of weakness, Paul. Unleash that sexy beast on the fair laydeez of Arrakis!


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:20 AM
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WHAT A JERK. We're in your corner.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:22 AM
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I did get to borrow like 20 or so movies so there's that.

Maybe she got swept up in the moment I'm not sure. There's a lot about it that made it seem like she was driving it from the beginning. And she was. Ah, maybe something turned her off or maybe the boyfriend is for real and she modulates her enthusiasm in a way which is very strange to me and gives the appearance of expressing romantic interest or something. Meanwhile I've segued from Joy Division to The Buzzcocks so my mood is improving at least.


Anyway there's something refreshingly like a return to normal life about this after a very long absence through a decade long crumbling marriage, illness, divorce, depression and unemployment and the long climb back. It's good to be back and having an adventure again. So come at me laydeez, come break my heart.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:38 AM
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It's good to be back and having an adventure again.

This is exactly how I felt when I started dating again. It can be a blast if you don't let the rejections get to you.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:49 AM
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Meanwhile I've segued from Joy Division to The Buzzcocks so my mood is improving at least.

Given their most famous song, this is not an obvious improvement from the outside.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:53 AM
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271: There are other options too, but it sounds like you're in a pretty good place. May you be the heartbreaker rather than heartbroken next time! Or not, but whatever. (I'm in a weird space right now; have to go back home to Lee, who decided against the apartment she thought she wanted, tomorrow. Also my hair looks extra stupid today, which should be fine since I'm only seeing relatives but is still annoying.)


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:33 AM
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She's a real tough cookie with a long history,
of breaking little hearts of the Atredies.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:44 AM
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Given their most famous song, this is not an obvious improvement from the outside.

Butchers' assistants and bellhops, you've had them all here and there.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:54 AM
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Boo friendship. Or maybe, yay friendship, boo friendship when things seemed to be leading to additional entanglements.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:18 AM
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Sorry, Paul. I used to find myself as the lady half of that situation more often than I'd like, but my remedy is to mention the boyfriend early and often when there might be confusion. So, at best, she either hasn't figured out how to be careful with other people's feelings.

Possible alternative theory: she does have a boyfriend but isn't very into him but isn't the sort to break up with a current significant other before lining up the successor.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 10:52 AM
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How long into conversation with someone plausibly interested does it become unethical to not have found a way to casually mention a significant other? I say somewhere between 1 and 2 hours.


Posted by: Unfoggetarian: "Pause endlessly, then go in." (9) | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 10:58 AM
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I'd say it varies hugely. Before you end up making plans for a particular rendez-vous somewhere would be my line. But if I have to work the boyfriend into any and all conversations at the 1-2 hour mark, that's a bit fussy. Your "plausibly interested" is doing a lot of work that I don't think is fair.


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 11:26 AM
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I am sorry to learn of your disillusionment, Paul.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 11:31 AM
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It seems weird to me that one would have to put in any effort to mention an SO within 2 hours, I feel like it's the opposite and that by that point I'd have to be purposefully avoiding it. At any rate, I certainly got quite a glare one of the few times I took longer than that (and that did not involve any time alone or plans for time alone). Honestly, I think I deserved the glare, as I was enjoying the experience of seeing if she was into me (despite no intention of breaking up or cheating).


Posted by: Unfoggetarian: "Pause endlessly, then go in." (9) | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 11:37 AM
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Hey, here's a question for you relationship mavens. Let's say you're going to a concert with your girlfriend, and performing at the concert will be a woman you went on a pair of dates with two years ago. That's not a thing that there's any actual reason to mention, right?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 11:52 AM
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I guess it depends a lot on the conversation. If it's "did you have a nice weekend" type stuff, then yes, that's pretzel-making. If it's "how long have you worked at X, what do you work on, what is Boss Y like" then, I can easily see failing to mention it. I just finished a week at a conference, and I easily went 2 h talking to guys without a mention of the boyfriend. "Plausibly interested" is what I'm quibbling with. I mean, I tend to drag mentions in if I think I'm being hit on, but there is so much grey area.

283: If it might come up again, then probably yes. If not, then no. Girls are hard!


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 11:53 AM
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It's like the Bechdel test, but for talking about having a SO.


Posted by: fake acccent | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 11:58 AM
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Sure, work-focused conversations don't count.


Posted by: Unfoggetarian: "Pause endlessly, then go in." (9) | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:10 PM
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Wearing a wedding ring helps, but given that I tend to come off as "flirty" I make sure to mention that I'm married pretty early into the conversation. Of course, sometimes I've felt like I've had to clarify that I'm married and monogamous, but whatever.


Posted by: J, Robot | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:25 PM
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I've had a few women over the past couple of years ask vague questions about "your wife/girlfriend" when, to the best of my knowledge, TWYRCL was unknown to them. Humbly, I interpret these queries as tributes to my musky, dangerous charisma.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:33 PM
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Aw, you and TWYRCL have been an item for the past couple of years!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:34 PM
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Kull wahad! Sorry to hear it, Paul,but better sooner than ambiguity.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:37 PM
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283: depends. Is that the reason you're going to the concert?


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:48 PM
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I would say mention it. It's interesting -- like, if you're going to see a performer who you know socially, you'd naturally mention it. So the only reason not to would be that you think having dated the performer would be the sort of thing your current girlfriend would think of as important, IYSWIM. At which point you really should mention it.

Tl;dr: If it's unimportant, mention it because fun and interesting, if important, mention it because important, if unsure which, mention it because not mentioning it makes it more important than it is.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:54 PM
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Mention mention mention mention mention.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:54 PM
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Will you be talking to the woman after the show, like to say congratulations or good job?

What are the odds that she dedicates a song to "Nosflow, the person responsible for the worst two dates of my life"?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 12:55 PM
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"To nosflow; I loved his sense of humor."


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 1:26 PM
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The French are occasionally into non-primary partner love affairs, non?


Posted by: Opinionated Stereotype | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 1:29 PM
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My sympathies, Paul.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 1:35 PM
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Meanwhile I've segued from Joy Division to The Buzzcocks

"Invasive Flora" would be a cool punk name.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 2:13 PM
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There should be a Harry Potter-esque novel or series of novels about Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen's years in Evil Planetary Dictator School. Dune: Carry On, Mr. Thawat or something like that.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 2:58 PM
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299: I can't offer you money, but how does the slavish adoration of a bunch of pimply neckbeards sound?


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 3:22 PM
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265: Sure there's a way. Raising the question in words, like Barry did. There's no way to communicate completely unambiguously without using language, but we don't have to.

Sure! But there's no need for the whole "Paul, your only problem at this point is that she thinks you might not be interested because you didn't jump her despite her sending every signal she had that she was interested" b.s.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 3:27 PM
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Yeah, I'm having trouble articulating my thoughts on this, but I see what Ned's getting at and I basically agree. I guess it's that a lot of dating advice revolves around signals and how to interpret them, but the truth is that there's no way to unambiguously signal any of this nonverbally, and the conventions around what signals mean vary so much in different contexts/social groups that trying to interpret them in isolation is impossible.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 3:42 PM
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But I was very appreciative of that push (thanks everyone!). Without it I might not have said anything and been living in agony for the next month or so. Much better this way.

It was also good to start getting into practice again with something that has never been easy after a very long hiatus.

And it's 2 AM here now and I'm off to bed.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 3:48 PM
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Good night, Paul! Here's hoping it doesn't take long for recover from this setback and get back in the game.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 3:54 PM
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I thought I could learn signals intelligence from the NSA but all their methods would lead to restraining orders.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 3:55 PM
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And that push of advice to Paul did also inspire me to summon enough courage to pursue my own opportunity (which still seems promising), so there's that too. Thanks guys!


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 3:56 PM
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May you have better luck than I did, teo.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 4:04 PM
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301, 302: Would it be fair to say that the role of 'signals' is to justify making an explicit move? I mean, explicit verbal communication is what I've been talking about as an ideal, but on the other hand walking up to a random acquaintance and saying "Wanna come up to my place and have sex?" is obnoxious. You don't want to be explicitly telling someone you want to have sex with them unless it's appropriate in context.

Ogged, in the post you quoted, was overstating things a bit; what I was thinking (admittedly, I was also thinking she was actually hitting on Paul, but I wasn't relying on it) was that with the background Paul gave, raising the question explicitly wasn't even a tiny bit presumptuous (and she doesn't seem to have perceived it as such).

Does that work better as a theory of what 'signals' are for?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 4:08 PM
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306: You haven't called it off in solidarity?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 4:13 PM
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308: Yes, that seems reasonable, and is similar to where I was getting in mulling this over in my head. There's still the ambiguity problem, of course, which I think is just unavoidable; if a signal were totally unambiguous it would cease to be a signal and would just be a statement. There's also the problem of signals meaning different things in different contexts, especially when it comes to cultural norms and so forth. This seems to have been part of the issue in Paul's case.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:15 PM
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309: No way. It's every man for himself out there.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:16 PM
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So, you're just preemptively ruling out a three-way?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:19 PM
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Because, feminist.


Posted by: Unfoggetarian: "Pause endlessly, then go in." (9) | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:20 PM
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I didn't say that. It would have to be a certain kind of threeway, though, because I'm a feminist.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:21 PM
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Really didn't expect to be pwned on that one, but it serves me right for being too verbose.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:21 PM
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Are "That's what she said" jokes still a thing?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:46 PM
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I am sorry Paul's situation didn't pan out, but applaud the adventure. Hooray for adventures!


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 5:48 PM
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316: that's what she s... huh. I don't know, I guess?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 6:21 PM
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huh. I don't know, I guess?

Ambiguous signals are deprecated.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:08 PM
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Part of the problem with analyzing signals in a place like this is also reading the signals Paul or teo seem to be giving off that they need encouragement to trust their instincts (sorry, Paul; though the truth is you were unsure and that seems to have been a fair read!) and a bunch of us talking about ambiguity and how can you ever know probably wouldn't have helped. At least this way there are some dates to end in failures or successes, and the rest of us can keep our fu da mental pessimism to our own relationships, right?


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:41 PM
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Some of us are giving advice to try to be helpful. I'm trying to amuse myself.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 7:59 PM
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I'm trying not to amuse Moby.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:01 PM
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I just feel like I should note that from time to time.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:03 PM
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Ditto.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:08 PM
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Which doesn't mean I can't be amused from time to time.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:09 PM
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There are no rules about who has to be amused first.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:19 PM
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I've found it awkward to signal that my interest in potentially compelling people is fully assignable to single friends I'm scouting for. Wasn't flirting on my own behalf, honest! Although I frequently flirt a perfectly normal amount. Anyways it all seems to generally have worked out.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:28 PM
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Part of the problem with analyzing signals in a place like this is also reading the signals Paul or teo seem to be giving off that they need encouragement to trust their instincts

Yeah, that's definitely true. Not to speak for Paul, but personally I basically never ask for romantic advice here with the intention of getting useful advice to act on. (Moby in 321 isn't alone, and the incentives of Unfogged advice-givers aren't really aligned with those of the recipients.) I generally bring these things up when I feel like I need encouragement to pursue an opportunity that looks favorable.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:31 PM
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I've found it awkward to signal that my interest in potentially compelling people is fully assignable to single friends I'm scouting for.

That seems like something that would be very difficult to signal. Probably better just to say it explicitly.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:32 PM
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"Would you like to come up to see my etchings? Asking for a friend."

"You're asking for a friend to come up or are you asking that question in the role of your friend, who has the etchings and the place to see them?"

"Damn ambiguous signals!"


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:37 PM
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Identifying yourself as Countess Anna Protasova might work.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:37 PM
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It would theoretically be easier if I wore a ring but I'll never do that. Anyways it hasn't been that bad ever, I've managed to convey the necessary clarification reasonably promptly.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:37 PM
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Yeah, what's the harm in saying so?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:37 PM
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333 to 329.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:37 PM
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What if I decide the person isn't as boffo as might have been? Easier to ease into that was just some nice harmless mild flirting.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:41 PM
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Everyone is maximally boffo. That's the first tenet of boffonomics.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:43 PM
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I guess that's like saying that something is the first law of the laws of boffodom.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:45 PM
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While theoretically elegant, boffonomics has been criticized for not taking into account empirical research showing that it may not be true that all people are maximally boffo.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:45 PM
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Boffodom is relative. No one is, nor does it even make sense to say that anyone might be, absolutely maximally boffo. But every person is, for some purpose or other person, maximally boffo.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:47 PM
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This is more of a transcendental law, a condition characterizing the concept of boffodom, than it is an empirical generalization. Vulgar critics often overlook this.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:48 PM
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Leading boffonomist neb nosflow offered a half-hearted response to the empirical critique, distinguishing between "absolute" maximal boffodom and a more situational definition.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:49 PM
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He combined this with an appeal to a higher level of abstraction for the concept of "boffodom."


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:50 PM
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I'm not sure why you characterize this response as "half-hearted".


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:51 PM
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Yeah, me neither.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:55 PM
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What if the person had a boffure just before meeting you? Do you think people just wake up boffo?


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:57 PM
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345: No, but neb apparently does.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 8:58 PM
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"Boffure" does not seem to be a word.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:06 PM
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Our freezer is so full of cake. I have no idea where all the buttercream is going to go.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:10 PM
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Whereas "boffodom" and "boffonomics" are well established in the lexicon.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:10 PM
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boffolo boffolo boffolo boffolo boffolo boffolo boffolo boffolo


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:14 PM
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348: meeeeeee


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:34 PM
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349: "boffodom" and "boffonomics" are formed using obvious and productive suffixes from "boffo". I have no idea what "boffure" is supposed to be.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:35 PM
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352: From context it's clearly a cosmetic procedure that people undergo to maximize their boffodom. It's understandable that this would be a confusing concept for someone who holds to the increasingly untenable orthodoxy that such a thing is impossible since everyone is always already maximally boffo.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:42 PM
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Oh like a … manicure? That was not clear to me from context at all (obviously), but note that just because I hold that each person is maximally relatively boffo (relative to some particular thing), that doesn't bar me from also believing that a person could strive to increase his or her boffodom in other regards.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:50 PM
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I haven't seen a single reason yet to believe that my position is untenable, let alone increasingly untenable.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-18-15 9:50 PM
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I wish now I'd responded in the middle of the night after all, but I though "boffure" was a funny and cute play on "coiffure." I was afraid my giggling would wake the girls.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 4:02 AM
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Good morning Thorn! I'm off on a road trip with a bunch of cow-orkers to a beach about an hour or so south of here. Going for an afternoon swim in the Gulf!


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 4:07 AM
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Broadly stated, the task is to replace the illusion of maximally relative boffosity of boffo man with a kind of rational assessment of boffoness that is compatible with the access to information and the computational capacities that are actually possessed by organisms, including man, in the kinds of environments in which such organisms exist.


Posted by: Herb Boffmon | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 4:19 AM
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That sounds lovely! Selah didn't get to sleep until after 10, do she was annoyingly chipper at 5-something. One last day at Lake Erie and then a long night drive home should go us all some good. Enjoy your trip!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 4:28 AM
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there's no way of knowing if there are "signals" that you are "picking up".

What? Even the subsequent evidence tells us there are, because she didn't react as if he's nuts, but as if she'd led him along (briefly) and wanted to clarify. I actually think he could have kissed her that first day (don't cry, Paul) but it's for the best that he didn't.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 7:15 AM
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Even the subsequent evidence tells us there are, because she didn't react as if he's nuts

Or, she reacted as if she could now retrospectively understand Paul's state of mind, even though at the time, she was not signaling.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 9:05 AM
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I call 360-361 for ogged, and agree that boffure is excellent.

Three 4 inch rounds left and all cake will be baked. On to 5.25 kilos of buttercream and 2.5 kilos of ganache.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 9:51 AM
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Everyone is maximally boffo. That's the first tenet of boffonomics.

I thought the first tenet of boffonomics was you do not talk about boffonomics.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 11:05 AM
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364

Boffson discretion error.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 11:28 AM
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365

360 that would have been too weird especially if it had been rebuffed. Now if she had put her hand on me knee while we were sitting on the same couch and looking at some of her family pictures together....

Neb may well have it right in 361.

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Boffins of boffo.


Posted by: Paul Atreides | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 1:26 PM
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Now if she had put her hand on me knee, an' in the accent of the Gaeltacht, begun to sing "The IRA Will Set Them Free," why then, I'd a knowed she were the gal for me.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 2:45 PM
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ONE AMAZING TRICK TO TURN REBUFFED INTO REBOFFED.


Posted by: OPINIONATED PUA | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 3:45 PM
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366: to nitpick, the several bits of Gaeltacht have wildly different accents, in Irish. In English, the accents are mostly same-ish as the respective adjacent English speaking areas. (So a Donegal accent, or a West Kerry accent.)


Posted by: emir | Link to this comment | 07-19-15 3:55 PM
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