You just have to drown the bunnies ... put a Glock to their heads.
So does he want to drown the bunnies or shoot them? This seems muddled and indecisive. Not the sort of disruptively innovative leadership one expects from a top administrator.
Also, does Glocking the bunnies get them something back on their tuition? I think that matters.
Bunnies are fast moving and tough to shoot with a handgun. That takes some skill.
unglocked bunnies bring down the retention rate
Maybe I need to read the actual article (shudder), but: how does glocking the bunnies not also bring down the retention rate?
I feel like, by the time my kids are ready for college, there won't be any left that aren't hopelessly compromised.
Heebie U is the most earnest place on earth, if they don't mind being around a bunch of super-conventional academically-weak-to-ok but nice enough students.
If it's too earnest to feel smug, what's the point?
Well, it's harder to compromise.
Is "Glocking" something that real people say? Or just creepy Internet gun nuts?
His point is that that the students aren't cuddly bunnies that are going to be easy to kill. Like Rasputin it may take more than one murder weapon to kill them.
10: Overprivileged ex-hedge fund wankers get in on the action too, it seems.
You know who else used Austrian weapons to make headshots?
7: I'm more worried about them being isolated from good architecture.
Deprived kids are the most endearing.
Thinking like that killed Gary Coleman.
Drowning rabbis is really tricky. They kick like anything and can swim surprisingly well (not that I've ever tried - but I had to give one a bath once and he wasn't keen on the concept). And shooting them with a handgun is both uncertain and unsafe. So much easier to just break their necks. More humane too.
I am sad that I know what a "Glock" is. I wish I didn't.
I'd rather have a Glock than a rabbit.
21: Seriously? The fact that you've even heard of a common firearm is a cause for sadness?
The fact that *everybody* vaguely knows what a Glock is is pretty sad given what we don't know: names of trees being taken out of a British dictionary, reprobates here mostly not knowing what a crotch curve is despite dedication to dick jokes and clothes, etc. Other stuff that I forget because I don't know it.
I'm going to Google crotch curve, if that makes you feel better.
Do you think you could recognize a crotch curve, if you saw it from quite a long way away?
I'm going to Google crotch curve, if that makes you feel better.
Make sure you turn off "safe search."
The most confusing British tree is the lime tree, which isn't a lime tree and doesn't have limes on it.
But Grinling Gibbons, so it's poetry all through.
There's at least one crotch curve dick joke, to wit, "straight down the middle".
The most confusing British tree is the lime tree, which isn't a lime tree and doesn't have limes on it.
If it were a lime tree it would probably have limes on it.
Does it grow calcium oxide or something?
The most confusing British tree is the lime tree, which isn't a lime tree and doesn't have limes on it.
Ahem, Plane trees.
If it were a lime tree it would probably have limes on it.
But it apparently isn't a lime tree, despite being a lime tree.
This was a longstanding misconception of mine about Coleridge's "This Lime-Tree Bower My Prison"; it really didn't seem so bad that he had to hang out there with his foot injury, not if he could eat limes. (Have a mojito, said lurid; have a laudanumito, I said.) I think it was lurid who broke the news that none of this was possible.
Bees are said to get drunk on tilleul. The perfume is heady. With sufficient poetic temperament, I think you have an argument, lourdes.
Bees are said to have anointed Virgil's lips with honey when he was a child. You can't believe everything that's said about bees.
Or is it just Plato, Pindar, and Ambrose who received that treatment? Where did I get the idea that Virgil was among that group?
Probably not Kew Gardens, though one can hope.
Well, well, well, this becomes interesting a topic.
You can't believe everything that's said about bees.
Maybe, but I intend to die trying.
And lime trees not only have nothing to do with lime (CaO), or with limes (the green citrus fruit), they also have nothing to do with birdlime.
24:
Again, you know
There are three kinds of tree, three only, the fir and the poplar,
And those which have bushy tops to; and lastly
That things only seem to be things.
A barn is not called a barn, to put it more plainly,
Or a field in the distance, where sheep may be safely grazing.
You must never be over-sure. You must say, when reporting:
At five o'clock in the central sector is a dozen
Of what appear to be animals; whatever you do,
Don't call the bleeders sheep.
I am sure that's quite clear; and suppose, for the sake of example,
The one at the end, asleep, endeavors to tell us
What he sees over there to the west, and how far away,
After first having come to attention. There to the west,
Of the fields of the summer sun and the shadows bestow
Vestments of purple and gold.
The white dwellings are like a mirage in the heat,
And under the swaying elms a man and a woman
Lie gently together. Which is, perhaps, only to say
That there is a row of houses to the left of the arc,
And that under some poplars a pair of what appear to be humans
Appear to be loving.
Well that, for an answer, is what we rightly call
Moderately satisfactory only, the reason being,
Is that two things have been omitted, and those are very important.
The human beings, now: in what direction are they,
And how far away, would you say? And do not forget
There may be dead ground in between.
There may be dead ground in between; and I may not have got
The knack of judging a distance; I will only venture
A guess that perhaps between me and the apparent lovers,
(Who, incidentally, appear by now to have finished,)
At seven o'clock from the houses, is roughly a distance
Of about one year and a half.
Bees are said to get drunk on tilleul.
They locate fresh supplies of tilleul by reading a specialist newspaper, Tilleulenspiegel.
41: How does a tree evolve to poison bees? That doesn't make any sense to me.
47: off the top of my head, possibilities might be:
a) it co-evolved with a different species of pollinating insect which was unaffected by the toxin
b) the toxin affects other insects much more than it affects bees (I notice aphids keep clear of the tree) and so it's a net advantage to the tree
c) the toxin has some positive effect on the bees (it's an antifungal or antibacterial, say) which nets out the disadvantage to the bees of getting them high
d), most disturbingly: it's possible the staff at Kew don't know what they're talking about.
47: It can't. It proves that intelligent design is right, and that God hates bees.
Obviously. Their penis falls off after sex every time. In humans, that happens less than 1 out of 100 times.
God hates bees.
He probably got stung, I bet.
He got pissed off because the Mormons keep infringing his trademark.
Mormons like bees?
(I am hurt that no one has noticed 46. I was rather proud of that. I thought at least it would get a nod from Smearcase, and other kulturny commenters.)
Just as long as no one expects me to get German jokes.
I appreciated 46. But I was too busy doing something else to comment.
Meaning that the Mormons were secretly in league with the Corsican tyrant!
http://www.napoleon.org/en/essential_napoleon/symbols/index.asp
And Napoleon was of course the Antichrist. It all fits together!
46, 54: I didn't see it until just now! It is good.
I'd never seen 45 before either and am glad that my thought "this resembles 'Naming of Parts'" has been somewhat justified by their being the work of the same author.
62: his stuff is all pretty good. "Movement of Bodies" is hilarious.
I thought 45 was hilarious and love Daniil Kharms but didn't think I'd be adding content by saying either of those things. Oh well?
||
Since it's been a few weeks since we've complained about doctors...
Like many female academics, I get very very testy when men condescend to me.* For the most part, the doctors I've dealt with w/r/t breast cancer have been good about this. If I say I've read a particular study, they believe me, and they generally pitch their explanations of things to an appropriate level. My breast surgeon does have a tendency to get all grandfatherly on me, but I'm alright with that given that he'll still talk the science and justify all of his recommendations.
The exception has been my gyn-oncologist, who comes off as if I'm threatening his authority when I ask questions.** He's the local expert on my genetic mutation, has a low rate of surgical complications, and is available on the date I want to have surgery, so I'll stick with him, but I needed to bitch about it somewhere and you lot seemed less likely than my cancer FB group to respond with "you go, girl!"
*Cultural studies types, IME, are the worst. "Yes, asshole, I have also read Kant and Hegel. Fuck off."
** I've disliked most of the male obgyns I've met. Go figure.
Grrrrr, girl! I'm glad the prospects for the actual surgery sound good, but that sounds incredibly frustrating, especially when you're already (presumably!) extra fragile/grumpy and deserve to be taken seriously.
You go, girl.
See, no exclamation point. Totally different.
65.2: Put him on the defensive by asking him if he's read Kant and Hegel.
who comes off as if I'm threatening his authority when I ask questions
You are threatening his authority. That's good.
I must have driven my gyn-oncologist to near-distraction. I was trying to pin him down on stuff he didn't know. (Because treating a pregnant patient is rare, he wasn't able to give me odds on outcomes.) He was very willing to say he didn't know; I couldn't figure out whether he didn't know because he didn't have any idea, or he wasn't satisfied with a level of precision that I would have been fine with. I badgered that poor man. Aside from not giving me answers he doesn't have, he is very pleasant.
J. Robot, you already know the way to go with this. You value this guy for his surgical skill, not his friendship. It sucks, but once the whole cancer episode is over, it'll just be one of the smaller sucky details.
I do remember sulking in some of the patient rooms, waiting for the doctor for ages and thinking 'I am as good at my field as you are at yours.' But we never ever talked about anything in my area of expertise.
I thought OBs were always recommending Hegel exercises.
You are threatening his authority.
Exactly. All power to the Robot!
Thanks, all. If I end wanting hormone replacement therapy, I think I'm going to see another doctor for it.
My gyn-onc was also the worst! Arrogant prick.
I do remember sulking in some of the patient rooms, waiting for the doctor for ages and thinking 'I am as good at my field as you are at yours.'
"And I am the former Wykeham Professor of Logic. We are both pre-eminent men in our fields..."
http://www.nytimes.com/books/00/12/24/reviews/001224.24spurlit.html