Re: Layin' Ted

1

God yes.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 9:37 AM
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2

BUS/TED


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 9:57 AM
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3

I still prefer the traditional "Cuban mistress crisis."


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 10:00 AM
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4

Yes, unseemly, but what's most fascinating about this is how perfect it is: Do you believe Ted Cruz could have had affairs with numerous people along the way on the campaign trail? Why, yes! He's just the type!

I mean, who knows whether it's true, and it's dirty pool for sure, but if anyone ever needed to be reminded how slimy he appears to even the casual observer, this is the guy.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 10:25 AM
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5

Pace Trivers, of course, who apparently finds Cruz endearing at times.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 10:29 AM
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6

But is it unseemly? Really?

I think Cruz is an awful enough and a dangerous enough person that enjoying this reflects a sincere appreciation of the value of justice and basic decency, even enjoying it a lot. He's a very bad person! When bad things happen to very bad people, in ways that have a chance at preventing them from hurting a lot of people, that's a good thing. We should be happy when good things happen.


Posted by: MHPH | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 10:37 AM
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7

One does ask oneself those questions, yes. Of course, the other side thinks the same thing when John Kerry is swift boated.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:04 AM
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8

I'm pretty sure Kerry never said anything like this.

Whether or not someone is a bad person is kind of part of that reasoning. If they aren't actually bad (and Kerry wasn't) and someone thought that then they were, well, wrong. It's bad to be happy when nasty things happen to decent people, and it's not really parallel to being happy when nasty things happen to really awful people. The nastiness of the person is the justifying factor...


Posted by: MHPH | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:15 AM
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9

Do you believe Ted Cruz could have had affairs with numerous people along the way on the campaign trail? Why, yes! He's just the type!

This surprises me. Is this how women look at Ted Cruz? I look at him as a completely sexless, joyless and emotionless entity.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:25 AM
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10

I never really understood heterosexuality in general.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:27 AM
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11

Of course, this helps Donald Trump. The weird thing is that the exact same story about Donald Trump would also probably have helped Donald Trump. Mostly though, I just feel bad for Heidi Cruz.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:27 AM
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12

Is there any reason at all to believe these rumors are true?


Posted by: Yawnoc | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:31 AM
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13

Sheer enjoyment.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:32 AM
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14

This surprises me. Is this how women look at Ted Cruz? I look at him as a completely sexless, joyless and emotionless entity.

Not women, exactly. Rather, it's part and parcel of the evangelical preacher persona which turns out to hide a sneaky philanderer. We've certainly seen it before. He's a snake oil salesman, so this picture goes.

Obviously I don't find him remotely attractive or interesting, but for women of a certain persuasion, sure, he could be.

11: Of course, this helps Donald Trump

I don't know what to make of this aspect of things: the woman most identifiably accused of having had an affair with Cruz is Trump's chief spokeswoman, Katrina Pierson -- who is a piece of work in herself. That doesn't help Trump, unless they wanted to throw her under the bus.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:44 AM
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Unsurprisingly, I'm with Ned. I would believe almost any other politician I've ever seen is having affairs (including, yes, HRC). But it's incredibly hard to imagine multiple women wanting to interact with Ted Cruz, on any level. Never mind--ugh.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:45 AM
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16

It would be an attraction to perceived power, no? After all, some several people are bankrolling Cruz's campaign: that's power in its own right.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:52 AM
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17

Look, people like all sorts of stuff.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:54 AM
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18

17 was a necessary reminder. That I'm glad I wasn't at the office when I received it.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:02 PM
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19

Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac.


Posted by: Overstimulated Henry Kissinger | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:03 PM
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20

Well, esp. if this is true, it would have been better if (a) he were nominated and (b) it were to come out in late September or early October.


Posted by: marcel proust | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:08 PM
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21

I didn't know 14.last. Is it below Trump to have one or more women on his payroll whose main job is to get Cruz to commit adultery with them? The question answers itself.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:08 PM
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22

I can't bring myself to read the actual reports. Is the evidence of affairs anything that looks damning to non-evangelicals?


Posted by: clew | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:20 PM
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23

21: Pierson supported Cruz in his Senate race in 2012, and was endorsed by his dad when she herself, somewhat hilariously, ran for office. She's a nutjob on the order of Michele Bachman.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:21 PM
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24

From everything I've read about Cruz it's certainly hard to believe he wouldn't try to have an affair, even if he hadn't spent like half his marriage living in a different state/house/whatever from his wife. And eventually I guess if you're persistent enough and have genuine political power or have good connections or whatever a fair number of ambitious people would probably consider it.


Posted by: MHPH | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:25 PM
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25

14: It probabl won't make anyone vote for Trump who would otherwise have voted for Cruz, but some of the Cruz supporters may stay home.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 12:26 PM
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26

I don't know--are we supposed to believe that 5 women have had sex with Ted Cruz? That number seems impossibly high.


Posted by: Miranda | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 1:35 PM
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27

Paraphrasing a remark about Ed Koch and Bess Meyerson, having had an affair would not make Ted Cruz more sympathetic, but it would make him less Lovecraftishly uncanny and weird.*

* His skin always looks pale, shined and oiled. His eyes have an animal cast and his face a slack, flounderish flatness. His voice is high, keening, at once plaintive and arrogant. Are we sure he isn't one of the creatures of the deep, who never see the sun?


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 1:45 PM
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28

Has anything come to light that has made these allegations seem credible?


Posted by: Trivers | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 2:04 PM
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29

28: This says at least two of the women have confirmed the story.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 2:50 PM
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30

Or at least that a Washington Times reporter has confirmed that story, on behalf of two of the women.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 2:51 PM
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31

I know one of the women--used to know her quite well--and will just say that her involvement in such a thing is spectacularly unlikely. Like, on the verge of logical impossibility. I'll believe these particular rumors when there's substantial, unfakeable hard evidence (as in l'affaire Edwards). I read the rumors yesterday and got all excited to watch Cruz go down in flames, then saw who was supposedly involved and immediately realized it was almost certainly BS.

(Of course I could be completely wrong! But I really don't think I am.)


Posted by: Millard Fillmore | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 3:35 PM
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32

Unclear if "such a thing" in 31 means "an affair" or specifically "an affair with Ted Cruz". Either way, I'm not sure how you could presume to know her well enough to be so sure of that.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:03 PM
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33

I'd even go as far as saying I'd be somewhat surprised to learn that Cruz hadn't made a pass at multiple women during his political career. He certainly seems the type.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:06 PM
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34

Are 32 and 33 supposed to be related?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:10 PM
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35

32: It could be that Millard Fillmore is the woman in question.


Posted by: Ace-K | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:18 PM
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36

Or is a married man who tried unsuccessfully to have an affair with her.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:27 PM
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37

31 seems very definite for someone who just used to know her quite well. How many spouses are being cheated on while being utterly sure that such a thing would be unthinkable? And spouses know each other a lot better than that.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:28 PM
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38

I dunno, politically, it's hard to imagine a less attractive person, but on an interpersonal level, I see guys every day who are a lot less palatable than Ted Cruz who are apparently getting laid. There's no accounting for taste.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:29 PM
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39

To 33, sure, whatever. But 32 is a very odd comment--do you have no friends whose basic character you think you know well enough that if they were rumored (on anonymous sourcing and no evidence) to have had a salacious, career-destroying affair, you'd assume it was untrue until substantially proven?

Anyway, to fully specify the thing I think my acquaintance would not do, I think she would not do something so obviously self-destructive and career-destructive in the era when such things are inevitably found out and widely publicized. There are other reasons I find it impossible to imagine in her personal case as well, but I'm going to cling to pseudonymity and not go into further detail.


Posted by: Millard Fillmore | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:30 PM
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40

And to further skeptical comments, I might be completely blinded by the grossness of the allegation (Ted fucking Cruz?? come on!!) such that I think it's way less likely to be true than it is. I hope not! But maybe so.

In any case though, until someone can come up with the goods, I don't see any reason to believe it.


Posted by: Millard Fillmore | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:34 PM
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41

I think it's important to remember that at least one of the alleged women was an expensive call girl, and I can imagine Cruz succeeding at convincing a prostitute to have sex with him (eventually) at least reasonably convincing.


Posted by: MHPH | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:36 PM
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42

When you can't trust the National Enquirer, who can you trust, really?


Posted by: Trivers | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 4:36 PM
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43

Let's all list our friends who we think would have an affair with a forty-something married guy who owns a suit.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 5:04 PM
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44

Or an Arby's franchise.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 5:07 PM
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45

I also wouldn't put it past whoever gave this stuff to NE to have slipped in one enemy along with the real mistresses.

Is this weird matching tattoo photo story real? Or are they shopped?


Posted by: Unfoggetarian: "Pause endlessly, then go in." (9) | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 5:12 PM
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46

44: I didn't know you switched jobs.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 5:16 PM
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47

matching tattoo photo story real?

Whoa. The Cruz one is on video, so probably legit. Carpenter's tweet, who knows, but it looks legit to my hopeful eye. Jaysus.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 5:39 PM
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48

Matching tattoo story? Does anyone have a link?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 6:23 PM
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49

Ink link?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 6:25 PM
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50

I think this story basically broke over the extended Easter weekend, so if it's going to blow up will probably do so Tuesday


Posted by: Asteele | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 6:27 PM
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51

Ted Cruz has a tattoo? Pray Jesus it is not something tracked by the SPLC.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 6:27 PM
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52

the extended Easter weekend

"Judas! Do you want a beverage? Try the mulled wine; it's terrific! And you've got a three-day weekend to sleep it off!"


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 6:28 PM
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53

One of the fabled sis-in-laws lost a beloved pet, estranged parent, and grandparent in quick succession and I am struggling with the wording of the most vague, awful, single sympathy card to cover all three. Bland generalities are occurring.


Posted by: LadyBird Johnson | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:14 PM
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54

"At least you're sleeping with my brother and not a Republican senator."


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:22 PM
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55

Sorry. I'm not good at switching topics.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:26 PM
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56

It's three lines long and Lyndon is giving me shit for the middle line, which is "Each loss is so unique." I really, really don't want to go buy a new card.


Posted by: LadyBird Johnson | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:30 PM
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57

Two cards is better than three cards and if they were spread out, you'd need three.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:32 PM
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58

I wasn't planning on sending any card for the first two, and then the third happened, and it felt like it was owed a card, but then it seemed bizarre not to mention that there'd been a cluster. I'm pretty sure the first is the most upsetting one.


Posted by: LadyBird Johnson | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:36 PM
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59

Also, maybe 56 should be re-pseuded.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:37 PM
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60

Oh whoops.


Posted by: LadyBird Johnson | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:37 PM
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61

Also, 58.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:38 PM
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62

And 60.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:38 PM
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63

Thanks, FPP, for cleaning that up. What an attentive, smart, attractive blogger you are.


Posted by: LadyBird Johnson | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:41 PM
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64

My theory is that sending condolences is more important than sending well written condolences. But I'm not very good at sending condolences because I never know what to say.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:41 PM
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65

Does anyone have a link?

Search twitter for "matching tattoos." They were temporary tattoos of Winston Churchill.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 7:56 PM
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66

Temporary tattoos doesn't scream "affair" to me.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:02 PM
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67

I have no affair, but I must scream


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:04 PM
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68

There's a 2014 politico April fool story about Cruz having a Churchill tattoo, is this just a mistaken use of a fake story or did Cruz see that two years ago and say hey, that's actually a good idea?


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:05 PM
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Somebody should do a text of some kind called "Temporary Tatooine" -- little vignettes of the lives of folx who work at Mos Eisely or clean out Jabba's rancor pit or whatever. Just like how they go about their day, the people they meet, their hopes and fears and dreams.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:06 PM
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70

The pictures on Twitter of both of them with the tattoos date to April 1, 2014.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:16 PM
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71

69: Have you seen A People's History of Tattooine? Not exactly what you suggest but still pretty great.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:19 PM
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72

71: I have not.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:21 PM
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73

Seems legit.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:23 PM
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74

Huh.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:24 PM
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75

Ok, watched the video. It was an April Fools joke by Cruz, who at first claimed it was a real tattoo, because funny. Carpenter seems to have gotten one too. This proves...nothing! Except that they were totally sleeping together.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:27 PM
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71: I have not. I note that one of the lesser contributors is a guy I went to HS with.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:29 PM
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71: I have not. I note that one of the lesser contributors is a guy I went to HS with. I like this comment so much, I'm just going to keep adding new sentences to it.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:34 PM
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78

Her post also says "we" and is of her wearing what looks like a taller man's suit jacket. And apparently the tattoos come in sets of two. Though someone else on Twitter says he had one two and like half a dozen people got them together that day as an April fools joke.


Posted by: Unfoggetarian: "Pause endlessly, then go in." (9) | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:39 PM
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79

||
Hey lawyers, what's the deal with this wacky new anti-abortion law in Indiana? Is it going to stand up in court? Some of the provisions sound like things even Scalia would've been hard pressed to find constitutional.
||>


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:46 PM
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80

One Churchill tattoo isn't enough. There is too many.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:50 PM
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81

Marketing!


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 8:51 PM
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82

There s/b three.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 9:12 PM
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83

Can't you just say something like, "I'm sorry for your losses" and keep it at that? Maybe one other vague line, but no more than two sentences. Harder to dig yourself into a hole.


Posted by: Buttercup | Link to this comment | 03-26-16 11:16 PM
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84

I ANAL, but most of the things in that law look like stupid posturing, which is not surprising coming from Stupid Pence. To be criminally liable it looks to me like a woman has to publicly declare her reason for aborting. Real tough to get around that one. In fact it seems more aimed at doctors, you get some pregnant activist to go to a doctor and state she wants an abortion for a forbidden reason, get the doctor to approve, then get him criminally charged for approving.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 03-27-16 5:30 AM
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85

I ANAL...

For a second there I thought that was gonna be much more info than I'd ever want to know about the Ted Cruz sex scandals.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 03-27-16 5:46 AM
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