Re: Illness

1

Make sure not to have sex with any pregnant ladies.


Posted by: J, Robot | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 3:35 PM
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2

I jogged two miles today for the first time in several years. I'm very proud of myself and appreciate this opportunity to brag. Plus, I'm not even that achey!

But yeah, you've got zika and probably killer bees and Mexicans -- all because we haven't yet built a wall.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 3:39 PM
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3

Either chlamidya or affluenza.


Posted by: Dr Tigre | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 3:40 PM
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4

1: ladies s/b laydeez.


Posted by: bill | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 3:41 PM
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5

It's never lupus.


Posted by: Opinionated Dr. House | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 3:44 PM
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6

You'd better start to coordinate your own care Right Now.


Posted by: bill | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 3:51 PM
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7

Sitting here on this bench during the kids piano lesson is the longest hour of the week.


Posted by: Heebie | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 3:54 PM
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8

Maybe you're just old.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 4:13 PM
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9

I'm voting for chikungunya.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 4:24 PM
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10

Babesiosis.
Malaria.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 4:29 PM
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11

Over Trump, sure.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 4:30 PM
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12

9

Haitians shrug off chikungunya: "Ah, I had that last year."


Posted by: DaveLMA | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 4:31 PM
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13

Probably Ebola.


Posted by: AcademicLurker | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 4:42 PM
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14

No, I've never been old before.


Posted by: Heebie | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 4:45 PM
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15

As God is my witness, as God is my witness they're not going to lick me. I'm going to live through this and when it's all over, I'll never be old again.


Posted by: Scarlett O'Heebie | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 5:00 PM
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16

The current disease going around the Caribbean right now is swine flu. So maybe its that.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 6:09 PM
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17

I already had that, in 2009.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 6:47 PM
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18

Disease Hipster.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 7:09 PM
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19

||Has everyone seen these already? I'm particularly fond of "Wrestle Me For America, You Thieving White Shit."|>


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 7:21 PM
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20

I can't tell if 19 is the stupidest thing I've laughed pretty hard at this week, or if that honor still goes to this advice column headline, with its apparent ghastly combination of loose morals and ban-worthy figurative language.


Posted by: lurid keyaki | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 7:38 PM
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21

If anybody is from San Jose, I'm now taunting you about hockey.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 8:34 PM
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22

Nobody's really from San Jose.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 10:23 PM
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23

(Apparently.)


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 10:23 PM
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24

You might have Zika. It's almost completely harmless unless you're pregnant. It'll be over in a few days. Now Chikungunya, that could have a big impact on your life.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 10:28 PM
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25

I live in San Jose but without cable I'm not watching the hockey. Tonight was a really good night to commute back from work during the game and go shopping at the usually busy Trader Joe's.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 10:34 PM
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26

I think all the recent mentions of health have really brought out the spam.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 10:47 PM
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27

Seems like it, yeah.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06- 6-16 11:13 PM
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28

But have we been speaking of penile health?


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 12:06 AM
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29

Bubonic plague. You've been playing with the prairie dogs again, haven't you?


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 12:50 AM
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30

I thought that was marmots, not prairie dogs.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 4:20 AM
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31

I thought it was both, or ground squirrels in general.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 4:29 AM
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32

I didn't realize it got that far east. Run.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 5:16 AM
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33

I won't vouch for my source on that which was only some pop-sci website and may well have got it wrong.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 5:29 AM
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34

Nope. I googled. There have been human cases in Colorado that they traced to prairie dog (via a not-prairie dog).


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 6:25 AM
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35

||

I just saw an old woman of unsteady gait put her back up against a big oak tree across the street and scratch against it like a cat.

|>


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 6:42 AM
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36

Don't try that with pine trees, because sap is hard to get out of shirts.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 6:46 AM
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37

This is a timely reminder of what can happen without proper Ministry registration and training of animorphmagi. Let that be a lesson to you all.


Posted by: Opinionated Dolores Umbridge | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 7:15 AM
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38

In summer 2009 at the height of swine flu panic, I managed to clear out a Chinese police station by casually mentioning I had a friend in America who'd been quarantined for swine flu. I don't remember how it came up--I was registering at the station with my landlord, and I don't think they asked if I had swine flu. The cops all sort of backed out of the room, except for the guy filling out the form, who got visibly nervous and moved as far away from me as possible.


Posted by: Buttercup | Link to this comment | 06- 7-16 3:08 PM
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39

38 is something you should somehow contrive to include on your resume. Not sure how you'd do that, but it should be done.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 06- 8-16 3:54 AM
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