did someone muck with the backend here

Re: Jesse Williams, Simone Biles

1

You're down with the gente, we get it. Fistbump!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:25 AM
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2

I know. Thanks.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:30 AM
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3

Seriously, between these and all the Pride parades this weekend and now a decent abortion ruling, it's great to see a facebook feed full of joy!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:32 AM
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4

The Calabar watched the floor exercise and declared that he wanted to learn the flips and then popped up into a surprisingly good imitation of her ending pose.

He was worried a few times that she'd land on the people in the background.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 10:21 AM
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5

Some of those jumps are... is that floor a trampoline? (Serious question.) Because if not, I don't understand how that is possible.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 11:21 AM
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5: Oddly, I realized that Jesse Williams answered your question in his speech, I may be misquoting slightly, but he ended his speech with, "Just because we're magic, doesn't mean we're not real."


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:06 PM
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5: Gymnastics floors do have some springiness to them, yes.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:10 PM
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8

3: Obviously one does not live in England.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:13 PM
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9

No, it's sprung, but it's not a trampoline. Have you seen the men's floor routines?

Not because they are better, men's floor routines are pretty boring by comparison, but because they are all about big air and lots of rotation.

https://youtu.be/TiHQii8sj_w


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:16 PM
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8: Still lots of that, yes. I meant new topics, not the totality.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:18 PM
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11

Sorry, mine.

Is this the thread where I should AT about breakup ethics or should I wait a while to see if it takes off? She's going to Knifecrimea until the middle of next month, so no hurry.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:21 PM
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12

That floor in that men's routine is obviously a trampoline or at least trampoline-like. I guess that means the women's floor probably is too. Oh well. Another seemingly amazing thing that turns out just to be smoke and mirrors.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:21 PM
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8: I'm just being a brat, because I have to pay my student loans with my newly depreciated funds.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:22 PM
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re: 12

It really isn't a trampoline. It's a hard slightly padded surface that sits on a rubber supports, or is layers of the harder surface plus rubber. It's not stretched canvas, or anything like as bouncy as a trampoline.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:29 PM
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15

Is it like a floor in a boxing or wrestling ring?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:30 PM
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There's a time lapse video here of one being built:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mc6Iq_JD1ww


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:31 PM
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It's not that thick a layer over the normal floor at all. Although it is somewhat sprung via the little rubber blocks that are built between the layers.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:32 PM
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18

And here I was hoping to see a video of Urple doing his Floor Exercise routine.


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:33 PM
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19

11 - Sexit.


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:34 PM
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20

19: "It's not you, it's a referendum!" has promise. Thanks!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 12:48 PM
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21

Justine Timberlake got in trouble for liking the Williams speech:

http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/entertainthis/2016/06/27/justin-timberlake-jesse-williams-bet-awards-twitter/86423274/


Posted by: jo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 2:25 PM
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22

21: That was so horrible, when all he has is LOVE for everyone.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 2:27 PM
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11: Ask! I am trying to guess what ethical issues would be relevant to a casual dating breakup (right? You're surely not thinking of sending Knifecrimeans to assasinate Lee, although that would probably be difficult to judge on ethics.)


Posted by: ydnew | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 2:47 PM
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24

He doesn't have just love. He's also bringing sexy back.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 3:50 PM
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25

I know I've seen ones with actual springs underneath the individual sections. I don't know if that's a competition floor or just one used for practice.
There was some gymnast (Dominque Dawes) who used to do insane passes where she'd flip across the diagonal in one direction, then partway through just spring and reverse direction back to where she started. That always looked totally impossible.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 4:06 PM
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We were shown a tediously long promo video* of child's former ballet program the other day and I am so delighted he is well clear of it. He was full of glee at his escape. Although he recognizes solid foundation from Russians.

I ski.med a new yorker profile of Biles and liked her willingness to stick up to oppressive trainers and also when she said she wouldn't do some insane trick bc didn't want to die.

*also sometimes unintentionally hilarious but mostly looooooong, anyone with a great deal of time on their hands it is here https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0QrAJF1LL0E

Keep in mind this is the sane veainabak brother. The other one is barking.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 4:14 PM
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dq: curious to know where he's putting his energy now. Different ballet training? Different dance form?


Posted by: Penny | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 5:59 PM
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28

23.2: While my pacifism has been sorely tested, I wouldn't PAY for an assassin because that seems too traceable. Maybe I'll feel better after court Friday.

But no, just that I don't have a lot of recent experience with casual breakups. I have the excellent excuse of having talked to her about how my life is too messy for it to be reasonable for me to date anyone and could just use that excuse. But some of the things that really didn't work for me are probably going to be problems in her other relationships too. But is it tacky to say that if she asks? Especially if I've had general and I hope gentle complaints so far but nothing more detailed? Claiming I'm just broken feels more comfortable but maybe isn't fair.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:06 PM
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The thing about breakups is they should be breakups. The UK (what's left of it) shouldn't trade with Europe anymore, for example ... or give them advice.

"The personal is political."


Posted by: DaveLMA | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:18 PM
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30

Putting an ordered list of all her faults on a white board and then calling her into the room is the standard way for heterosexuals to break up.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:21 PM
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31

Still ballet technique 2-3 classes a week at a different studio (fantastic, elacsap royel highly highly recommend and she is a just lovely person too) and 2-3 tap and at least 1 Bollywood per week at cdo (also great especially atiman roopak).


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:26 PM
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32

Fine! I won't say anything, which is probably for the best. I just have to wait another month or two until we see each other again, I guess.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:36 PM
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33

And I'm not sure how much this should be a breakup given that I'm not sure how much it was even a relationship, which I realize is one of many lesbian cliches. If we could glide through to just being friends that would be fine with me and goodness knows I don't have enough, but she's the one with stronger feelings and so I can defer to her preferences.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:40 PM
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34

Just send her an email saying "you are dead to me." Then, if she tries to follow up or come to your home threaten her with a restraining order and tell her to talk to your lawyers only.


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:47 PM
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35

33: Have Selah tell her you're moving into an apartment with me. Works every time!


Posted by: J, Robot | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:50 PM
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36

Alternate approach: set up a public webpage listing her flaws in detail. No further communication with her aside from sending her the page's URL.


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:53 PM
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37

34 doesn't even work with my older, more significant breakup. Stupid Lee!

35: Selah was talking about you just tonigh!. But I think the idea is that I need/deserve more partners, so that probably wouldn't help.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:55 PM
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38

And none of my complaints are meant to imply I think I'm not flawed or that I'm any good at relationships. I think I see that pretty clearly.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:58 PM
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39

Really, the simplest and best method is to pull a straight ghost. No contact, no response, no reasons. So easy and so not your problem anymore.


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 6:59 PM
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40

She informed me this weekend that the local queer community is small enough that both ghosting and giving someone a fake name at a bar tend to backfire on you eventually. I suppose it wouldn't take much extra work to keep myself in seclusion for the year until she leaves to avoid any repercussions, but even with that I don't think I could manage ghosting.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:04 PM
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41

For fake names, Wry Cooter is still available.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:08 PM
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42

41: That might create unreasonable expectations.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:10 PM
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43

A woman at Pride was sure she was Tiffany, and she's pretty sure she wouldn't have used Tiffany as a fake name but not 100%. Her ex-gf, there with us even though she'd asked to bring her new bf and not this unobjectionable woman I'd met before yet that still bothered me, was the one who'd unwisely ghosted someone she then ran into socially.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:13 PM
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44

I have strong feelings about aquatic turtles and am not sure I could really self-identify with cooters, Moby. I'll keep that in mind, though, and as usual never ever take your advice.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:14 PM
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45

I have strong feelings about aquatic turtles

See, there's your excuse for the breakup! "I'm sorry, but I just can't be with someone who doesn't care about aquatic turtles as much as I do." (This is assuming she doesn't, which I think is a safe assumption.)


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:36 PM
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46

I'm pretty sure I don't understand 43 but I say have sex with everyone and then ghost them.


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:40 PM
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47

I think I'm going to do the opposite of 46 and see how that goes instead.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:44 PM
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48

The real challenge is caring about non-aquatic turtles.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:50 PM
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49

Tortoises are great, though. Everyone should care about them.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:51 PM
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50

Tortoises, please.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:51 PM
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51

Goddamnit, teo!


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:52 PM
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52

Are all non-aquatic turtles tortoises? I admit I don't know much about turtle taxonomy.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:52 PM
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Apparently there's some dispute:

The American Society of Ichthyologists and Herpetologists uses "turtle" to describe all species of the order Testudines, regardless of whether they are land-dwelling or sea-dwelling, and uses "tortoise" as a more specific term for slow-moving terrestrial species. General American usage agrees; turtle is often a general term (although some restrict it to aquatic turtles); tortoise is used only in reference to terrestrial turtles or, more narrowly, only those members of Testudinidae, the family of modern land tortoises; and terrapin may refer to turtles that are small and live in fresh and brackish water, in particular the diamondback terrapin (Malaclemys terrapin).

It goes on to explain how British and Australian usages differ.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:57 PM
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I admit I don't know much about turtle taxonomy.

1. Chicks dig it, for certain values of chicks.
2. The aquatic turtles I know most about are really probably terrapins since they're all into basking and stuff, not just in the water all the time like those ridiculous popular sea turtles.
3. Tortoises are land turtles, yeah.
4. But also I think this is another of those things where terminology is different in different parts of the English-speaking world, so really taxonomy pedantry doesn't matter to an even larger extent than I'd assume you'd already assume it doesn't.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:58 PM
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55

Ok, could you just pwn me on breaking up with my girlfriend and I won't even have to bother?


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:58 PM
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Ok, could you just pwn me on breaking up with my girlfriend and I won't even have to bother?


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:58 PM
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57

WHAT THE HELL, BLOG? WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO DESERVE THIS??


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 7:59 PM
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58

I'm ghosting her as we speak.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 8:04 PM
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59

Just live by ABG, Always Be Ghosting.


Posted by: R Tigre | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 8:08 PM
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28: Seriously, if you're breaking up, not your problem. The kind of romantic advice you seem to be contemplating, to my mind, is only the done thing between couples, and maybe, maybe, some very close friends, but in this case, feel free to repeat "It's not you, it's me" as necessary until the heat death of the universe. It's polite and conflict-avoidant, that's your preference for how to break up, and that's the most you owe them.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 8:42 PM
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Maybe he white board is too informal. PowerPoint is what the kids are using.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 8:46 PM
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That's good advice, Minivet. I would want to know but I have all kinds of things I'd nosily want to learn but never will. That's no reason to put her through the same thing. (And she seems genuine in thinking I'm great or whatever, so pushing her to reciprocate probably wouldn't go far either.) I'm just afraid there's going to be pressure to participate in a bunch of processing about what went wrong, which I guess I could also still blame on me, so that works.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 8:46 PM
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I may regret saying this, but I don't think it's on you to let her know what she did that didn't work for you. She's going to *want* to know so that (short term) she can FIX it and get you back, and you know that's not going to happen no matter what, so it's better to just stick with that you don't want to be her girlfriend. You don't have to portray yourself as damaged or broken (although I've done it, so no judgement). The truth is that this is not the relationship you want to be in, no matter how casual, and you have no obligation to continue it when it isn't what you want.

If it weren't for the small-ness of the community I'd agree with Tigre. But you really, really don't have to justify yourself further than that you're not feeling it.


Posted by: Penny | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 9:02 PM
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Thanks. I honestly don't know how normal adults do things, so this is helpful. I also really don't want to ghost people. But I'm no longer on okcupid or doing anything to try to meet anyone, so it shouldn't be much of a concern.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 9:08 PM
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dq: that's one lucky kid. What a delicious mix.


Posted by: Penny | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 9:09 PM
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I also don't know how normal people do things. I do suspect, based on experience of being broken up with, that the very things she'd try to change to win you back are things someone else might overlook or even love, so no sense messing with her future prospects.


Posted by: Penny | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 9:12 PM
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Penny is right, nothing owed. I recommend cheerfully lightheartedly and relentlessly refusing to be drawn. Wear her down with lightly self deprecating not-getting-into-it. This is so un-American in my experience that it throws the being left person off and therefore works a treat.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 9:48 PM
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Yes, I'm very happy he has transitioned happily to dance as a lifelong source of joy rather than all consuming passion. 😊


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 9:54 PM
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69

My wife and I ghosted this other couple we'd hung out with off and on for a year or so. The wife had taught at the same school as mine. It was easy and great. I recommend.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 10:58 PM
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Isn't ghosting easy by definition? It literally involves doing nothing.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 11:04 PM
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71

Next up, gswift ghosts a puppy only to have it return as a dog.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 11:05 PM
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And by "involves" I guess I mean "consists of."


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 11:06 PM
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73

Ghosting is the opposite of haunting.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 11:07 PM
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70: The thought of it seems to bother some people.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 06-27-16 11:08 PM
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75

Good


Posted by: Samsung | Link to this comment | 06-28-16 12:02 AM
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76

As an update, she just messaged me that she's getting ready to leave and it will be hard for her to keep in touch and I said no worries about that because I'm pitiful. My plan is to hope she's right about sporadic contact and then being able to claim that the time even more apart than usual gave me clarity, or something.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 06-29-16 8:10 AM
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