What about when a couple can't agree about who the cranky one is? "Why are you being so cranky?" "I'm being cranky//?"
Does it count as crankiness if one seethes internally with an anger like restive volcanism, but function outwardly with only a slight grimness of mien?
Ooh, ooh, I'm the friend in 3 for sure. Also something something muscle relaxants really cut down on the self-editing bits.
I don't think you can give a straight answer like 12%. It's got to be a function of how often the other person you are with is cranky and how much time you spend together. If you only see somebody for two minutes a day, go ahead and be cranky 100% of that time. What does it matter?
But, if you have to give an average answer covering all situations, it's 12%.
3 sounds like the plot of the horror movie I watched last night. If people around you start dying mysteriously and you have unexplained gaps in your memory, you might have a problem.
I don't really do cranky as a mood. I just have an anti-social baseline.
I'll be sure to keep an eye on him.
I'm cranky in a way I'm not sure is going to pop out externally today, since my long weekend was entirely eaten up by sitting about and moaning from lingering gastroenteritis (or its symptoms) only apparently put in check by going on BRAT Sunday, plus jet lag waking me up at 2AM followed by multiple long daytime naps.
That's what you get for trying to experience new things. It's just not worth it.
I mean, if you're young, you don't have much choice. But after 30 the risk/reward ratio starts to get unfavorable.
10. I suspect that's common on Unfogged, which is why we're all here.
Seriously, the best thing to do if you're cranky is to go away. Whether "away" means another room, another street or on line is immaterial.
I was the person in 3. I'm not now, because I'm out of that relationship, and I'm sure I was not a lot of fun to be with. I feel pretty bad about that.
In spite of having been the cranky one, I have opinions about when cranky imposes unfairly.
1. When there's no attempt to solve the problem causing the cranky, or even worse the cranky person claims cranky as a personality thing.
2. When the cranky person spreads the feeling through the whole living space. Cranky can be contained to a room, or taken for a walk.
3. When the cranky is combined with a bunch of selfless behaviour that will inevitably bring on more cranky feelings. I've done it, and it's hard to stop doing it, but it's really not fair.
Cranky can be contained to a room, or taken for a walk.
Cranky can be crate trained but will not use a litter box.
Apparently, people produce a great deal more urine than cats. That's all I have to say about that.
But probably less than tigers, or smilodons.
18.1 I don't think people are capable of producing any cats at all.
There was a great Onion article on that.
Definitely less than tigers, or even housecats, on that score.
I try not to take my crankiness out on other people, especially given that I don't live with other adults, but I definitely slipped at times this weekend. I don't have a good answer for this and haven't thought out a meaningful understanding of it. I just try not to be as mean as I'd like to be, I guess.
Cats read the Onion without pausing for sleep.
Anyway, I'm writing this crankily today because I'm unwell. In general Penny seems right about being out of an awful, destructive relationship as being a good way to get over crankiness. For me, not heebie.
being out of an awful, destructive relationship the end of the world in raging fire as being a good way to get over crankiness.
FTFY.
I thought that this was going to be about Pokey.
What counts as cranky? Actively snapping at people? Whiny complaining?
Like, I'm not successfully performing 'cheery' all that much these days, but I'm not sure whether or not I'm avoiding crankiness.
being out of an awful, destructive relationship as being a good way to get over crankiness.
I'm disconcerted by this, because I've been out of that relationship for 6 years now, and I still enjoy the novelty of being mostly not cranky. I'd believed that if I ended the relationship I'd just bring all my discontent into the next one. Turns out no, that was just something somebody said.
Gosh, LB, why can't you be more cheery? You get three days to be in the "downs" about a divorce and then you need to BE POSITIVE! Put on a happy face and smile, smile, SMILE!
I try, but it keeps on turning into that "chimpanzee that's about to bite you" fixed grin.
29: I can make you cranky again by sharing some of the stupid things the mediator said about my crankiness and lack of patience being as bad as (and thus prompting!) her abusive behavior, if that would help kick the novelty a bit. (Actually I can't, because that was basically the whole of the comment since I chose not to spend $200/hour to explode all over him and let them all see what actual lack of patience or kindness would look like.)
What counts as cranky?
For me: feeling sustained irritation at someone who's doing nothing more than going about their business, not actively trying to bother me. Being unable to hear what someone is saying because the internal monologue of complaint is turned up too loudly. Finding myself in the middle of imaginary conversations in which the other person acts particularly badly. Deliberate fault-finding that ramps up the cranky. That's how I experience it, I have no idea what it looks like from the outside. Apparently it's not imperceptible.
$200/hour to yell at somebody for a solid hour seems excessive, but at $20/6 minutes, I'd book it once a week.
Pokey is "cranky" like a hurricane is "a little damp".
29: WHOA I AM CRANKY NOW the mediator what? Oooh, I just got a jolt there. Nice.
Yeah well I guess I'll get to go back to the mediator soon since she hasn't complied with a single one of the things she agreed to, but that means this time he'll just be mad at her. I'm basically okay with paying to have someone else take on that job, which is also kind of what my lawyer is for. Anyway, I'm not supposed to be letting myself talk about all the details, just the cranky-shocking parts like that.
The good counselling professionals I've met have been very good, but the not good ones my god. That's really terrible.
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ATM. The son of our friend who's dying of cancer (now imminent) called to ask if we can put somebody up from out of town. Doesn't yet know who or when they'll get here. It's 16:45 over here. Is it OK if we don't offer them a full meal when they get here, given that we were planning on eating leftovers?
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My sympathies.
On the food, maybe just have something for sandwiches since you really know enough to plan a meal.
I don't know what the norms in knifecrime are, but here that would be fine, especially as you don't know what time they're coming. Maybe some carbs available for comfort? (Sorry RT) I'm so sorry about your friend's son.
Penny's list in 33 is one the money.
We have bread, cheese and fruit. If they turn out to be vegan, they're shit out of luck.
40 My sympathies. Moby is right in 41. If you have something snackable too you can put that out or show them how they can help themselves.
If they're vegan they can eat the bread and fruit.
Do vegans eat avoid eating figs because of the dead-wasp factor?
If I were vegan, it wouldn't bother me. The wasp died a natural death.
$200/hour to yell at somebody for a solid hour seems excessive, but at $20/6 minutes, I'd book it once a week.
If you really want to pay those rates, I can give you my phone number and the name of my paypal account.
New business plan: Make a breed of cows that dies of natural causes before age 3, sell beef to vegans.
Surely even vegans agree that wasps deserve to die.
50: I would, if Comcast customer support weren't free.
I was thinking about selling a brand of vegan cheese on the premise that it comes from milk produced by vegan cows.
If my grandmother were a wasp, she would lay eggs.
54 might be expensive in baby formula.
Crunched up wasps have the right nutrients for your baby's developing brain.
44 - if they turn out to be Vegans can't they just go conquer some Danes or something?
No, as long as the calves only drink milk from vegan cows, they are also good.
Your business plan might involve you in an infinite regress, but venture capitalists never take Phil, so you should be fine.
It's vegan turtle milk all the way down.
For me: feeling sustained irritation at someone who's doing nothing more than going about their business, not actively trying to bother me. Being unable to hear what someone is saying because the internal monologue of complaint is turned up too loudly. Finding myself in the middle of imaginary conversations in which the other person acts particularly badly. Deliberate fault-finding that ramps up the cranky.
I'd say this is spot on. Especially the imaginary conversations part. Also, remembering every little slight or annoying thing the other person has done. I get cranky fairly easily, especially at certain times of the month, but I try to deal with it by mindfulness, which allows me to recognize that I'm cranky and then try to break off negative thought patterns. I also find just being left alone for 15 minutes does wonders. Living in a tiny studio is not helpful for that, but mentally being left alone helps. It also helps that my boyfriend is 110% less cranky than me, and pretty patient. We also manage to alternate, so that when he is cranky is usually when I'm not. Handling sustained crankiness with equanimity is possibly one of the rarest and most amazing traits in my boyfriend, and outweighs everything else on the potential cons list of dating him. I have to be careful not to take too much advantage of it.
32 is like one of those infuriating reflexive BothSidesIsm journalism examples come to life and inserted into personal relationships. My sympathies, Thorn -- faced with that level of gaslighting I would have been tempted to deck the mediator, and I'm not the hitting kind.
Pokey is "cranky" like a hurricane is "a little damp".
But this doesn't distinguish him from the other children.
Seriously, are other people's kids often in a good mood? Or just a medium mood? How do you get that to happen?
Oh man, I have been cranky at home a lot lately and it's all because I'm just so fucking tired. (This is probably a sign I should never have children.) But yeah, Penny's list is spot on.
Having less than four of them?
67 to 65. Though apparently applicable to Parenthetical as well.
67: No, no, I'm sure that's not it. They love competing for limited resources.
Texas is a stronghold of neoliberalism.
65: A medium mood would be nice. Ours seems to go straight from cranky to "sparkly", a term of art as I understand it. Which can be a bit fun but not really very manageable.
And then right back to hitting me when I suggest, say, that he should wash his hands.
65: Kai is naturally cheerful, while Iris is naturally neutral, but with variance in both directions. Adolescence is making her crankier, not surprisingly, with manic episodes as well. But we surely have nothing to do with it.
Kai acting cranky is a surprisingly reliable marker of hunger. He's rarely cranky from being tired, because he's always laid himself down when he's tired, which is nice.
crankiness is pretty closely tied to power in a relationship. not everybody gets to be cranky.
I try, but it keeps on turning into that "chimpanzee that's about to bite you" fixed grin.
Looking forward to the meet-up. . .
65: My son is often in a good mood when nothing much is going wrong. Because he's my genetic material his good mood presents as sort of a neutral thinking face, not cheery, but I know he feels good. When he runs into something that's hard for him he gets upset. Things that are hard for him are transitioning from one thing to another, plans changing, not being able to do something at a skilled level the first time he tries it, losing face, being misunderstood, having to repeat himself, having to go along with a timetable planned by someone else, being taken on errands, being asked to do something he doesn't care about...when you're ten, you're up against these things a lot. He's less upset by these things than he was last year. He's getting more skilled at dealing with them. I'm getting better at apreciating the skill.
One thing I'll add to Penny's excellent list: being snappish about basically neutral behavior. Or, perhaps better phrased, treating neutral behavior as (intentionally) offensive.
"chimpanzee that's about to bite you" fixed grin.
I love this.
Noooo, 75 won't load. Don't make me cranky, Tigre! You wouldn't like me when I'm cranky!
It's kind of amazing how so many of the memes in the "More Images" at the bottom are about Clinton having people killed.
84 is sadly kind of historically accurate.
If you replaced the contents of A History of the English-Speaking Peoples with 84, it'd be for the better.
This is decent: https://www.balloon-juice.com/2016/09/05/192197/
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So if you unexpectedly find yourself sharing a hotel with the national convention of a prominent anti-Muslim hate group, how should you troll them?
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Order room service from their room. Insist it be Halal.
How committed to this are you? How open are the events?
I'm curt and impatient with adults 100% of the time except when there are real emergencies going on and then I'm lovely. It has its own charm. Anyway the people around me are used to it--anyone I was going to alienate was alienated years ago. If I were starting from scratch I'd go for 20% I guess? 20% of time.
"Chimpanzee that's about to bite you fixed grin" describes all my professional bio photos (also possibly just my face).
90: Not that committed. I'm tired, and I have to leave early in the morning. But I'd totally greet them in the elevator with a friendly "Allahu Akbar", or loudly ask at reception which way points to Mecca.
That would just make them think Muslims have a poor sense of direction.
Do you have your Ann Coulter mask with you?
recordings of muezzin in air ducts at a soft enough volume that they're not SURE they're hearing anything
I told you I was good in emergencies!
C. Stabby wins! Who has an MP3 / YouTube link I can play on my phone in the hotel bar?
Depending on your gender, you could cover your hair with an American flag bandana.
75, 84 memegenerator not working on my phone but if it were:
burnt the loaves/danish got burnt
77: Wow, that's my 10-year-old son exactly. Are they all like that?
MP3 of the Adhan downloaded. Off to the hotel bar to order something with NO ALCOHOL.
77: Wow, that's my 10-year-old son exactly.
Ditto. So I can expect him to become a cheerful teenager, right?
The effectiveness of this troll is limited only by the degree of overlap between the attendees at this conference and persons suffering from mild to moderate hearing impairment.
It was hard to keep a straight face in the elevator with the voice of the Muezzin emanating from my trouser pocket, but the discomfort in their faces was worth the effort.
It occurred to me a little too late that what I needed to do was set up a WiFi network called "Jihad_Army" or "Shariah_Power" and broadcast it in the lobby.
Probably over the character limit, but I'd go with "Muslims_Who_Like_Dating_White_Women_Perhaps_Your_Daughter_Who_We_Find_Quite_Attractive"
Hamhocks is doing the Lord's work, tonight. I'm not sure your name is even halal.
That's awesome Salty, well done! !رائع
I need some sleep. I think TV is showing Shatner, Terry Bradshaw, George Foreman, and The Fonz at the DMZ.
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Usual suspects (may be crankiness-related): did anyone else here, or in the larger world, writhe in unspangled agony while hate-reading that Janet Malcolm piece on Yuja Wang?
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Also excellent work Salty, made me grin big. Also I am only intermittently reading these days so blanket joy and sympathy to everyone.
Where's our mashup of "Allahu akbar" and George W. Bush saying "Embrace jihad"?
111 - that show proves that cocaine's not dead amongst people greenlighting shows about the cocaine generation!
112: This week's New York Times Book Review includes a Caitlin Flanagan review of a new Tom Wolfe book. Nothing in this world scares me any more.
But you have to admit, we're definitely in the heroin phase of the cycle alameida's dad described.
119 I vaguely remember that. Got a link to TFA?
The fentanyl shit is fairly terrifying. I remember when the Russians used it during the Moscow theatre hostage thing back in 2002 and they pumped in fentanyl gas and ended up killing over 100 of the hostages with it.
That was a lot easier to find than I expected.
Fentanyl or carfentanil? The latter seems like the really scary one.
In other news, Josh Marshall gets results.
121 Thanks. I think it turned out to be carfentanil combined with another equally frightening analog.
Elephant tranquilizers. What could possibly go wrong.