We should invade Syria to rename their capital city "Meniscus".
yuo know what completely change everyone's opinion of the Bush administration? If they got the French to invade Syria.
It's only with effort that I avoided a post titled "The case for Ogged's invasion of your vagina."
7. Your vagina is invadable. Unlike Pakistan, it doesn't already have nukes. And there's some reason to believe that your vagina might welcome an invasion.
This is really the weak point of the argument, because it applies equally to your rectum.
Before the invasion of my vagina begins, I would like to invite international inspectors to verify that I do not have a vagina.
#5: I don't know if that's true. There must be survey evidence about women's relative preferences for anal vs. vaginal sex, but I don't know where one would find it.
Re: 8
Where's apostropher when we need him?
1. It would be bad if Ogged's phallus went off in an American city. The Tivo hasn't been reset in a long time; things could get ugly.
I had conceived of letting the different instances of "your" bind to different referents. The owner of the vagina and the owner of the rectum might not coincide.
whether al-qaida and your vagina have had contact is largely irrelevant, because there's very little to keep them from having contact in the future, especially in that they have a mutual enemy in my massive cock.
How long until we change the name of this realm from the outdated "United States of America" to the catchier and more aptly titled "Our Massive Cock?"
It fits better with our current role in the world.
This is really the weak point of the argument, because it applies equally to your rectum.
Standpipe, are you implying that ogged has weapons of ass destruction?
So, are we dismissing out of hand the possibility that ogged might invade your vagina for the purpose of freeing it from patriarchal norms, etc.?
it's very difficult to disabuse a vagina of patriarchal norms once they've been, uh, inserted.
so that's not as realistic a goal, and it might require that we stay there longer than we'd like.
ogged has promised us a quick, in-and-out procedure, and that's all we're willing to sign up for.
Look, I can't imagine that there are any good arguments against my invading your vagina, but there needs to be a plan, and a viable exit strategy. How long will I stay? What will I do when I'm there? Will it offend the locals? How can I be sure the mission's been accomplished? To just go in and leave a mess would be, if I may say so, unamerican.
are you implying that ogged has weapons of ass destruction?
No, those belong to Labs.
first, you ought to get permission from all of the neighbors.
Text, I'm unwilling to give the neighbors veto power over my cock.
then they're not going to support you when you need their help invading a more treacherous vagina.
or when the vagina become unruly and requires more cocks in order to subdue it.
One cock can't go it alone, ogged.
"What John Kerry wants to do is to give the neighbors veto power over our cock."
We don't want the smoking gun to come in the form of a sperm cloud.
I hate to bring this up again, but ogged needs to shepherd his resources. There are many vaginas in the world; how do we distinguish the need to invade your vagina from the need to invade other, similar, vaginas? Or is ogged going to spend all his time invading vaginas? Relatedly, does ogged have the institutional knowledge to re-shape his mission toward vagina invasion as a primarily purpose?
We need to think harder about this.
I think it's highly unlikely that it would take anywhere near 45 minutes for Ogged to go off, given the opportunity.
26 is a bit disturbing.
And I should be honest about the possibility of setting up a permanent base, post-invasion.
Is anyone else highly dispreferring the vagina/murderous tyrant analogy here? Is my sense of humor suddenly borked?
"What John Kerry wants to do is to give the neighbors veto power over our cock."
I'm pretty sure this was the actual administration line, wasn't it?
we've got an analogy, dammit, and I'm going to take it to its logical conclusions.
32 - That's why I tried to locate my comment more on the territory of "George W. Bush/arbitrary assertion of cock."
32: No, this is treacherous joke territory. Back to the rectum!
New topic: The case for invading text's rectum!
if you prefer talking about rectums, we can do that Standpipe, but it will be more difficult, because I haven't even met him.
#32: I think the vagina here is not a murderous tyrant, but a subjugated people. But I am increasingly creeped out by a fair reading of what "invading" a vagina could mean. (Though, I think, FL tried to address that by making the case to "you" about "your" vagina.)
I'll tell you one mistake we won't make with this one: after Ogged invades your vagina, you'll definitely want some bathification. Democracy is messy.
You go to war with the cock you have, not the cock you wish you had.
if you invade my rectum, you will face a cunning insurgency, and it will not let up until you have left. When you do leave, it will be a messier place than it was before you came.
our cock was not given the protection that was promised, and has to pick up bits of metal in the road to shield itself from danger.
This is all some neo-cockservative fantasy. Believe me, once you're in there, nobody will be throwing flowers and candy. And then our cock will be stretched to the breaking point.
Check your map, text. If there are bits of metal in the road, you might want to consider the possibility that you've invaded the wrong country. On the wrong planet.
#47: But what if ogged hits something he didn't intend to hit during the shock-n-awe phase? Might he not inflame an otherwise welcoming portion of the rectum, thus making the invasion more difficult?
Tim, are you worried about separatist Turds?
Yeah, the last thing we need is ogged blowing up another asspirin factory.
FL, even if ogged wings over the Turds, how can we be sure the Shits will support democracy?
I am jubilant at the return of shallowness and frivolity, but would like to register an objection to Ogged's tricksy way of bringing it back. There are still people hoping for an escalation to Syria or Iran, you know.
In the interest of comity, shallowness, frivolity, and lewdness, I will refrain from making any response to Joe O's vain and absurd claim.
The sentence above is definitive, and will remain my sole non-response to Joe O's ludicrous and pathetic attempt at a personal attack.
At this point Joe O has not been added to the list of those whom I want to die horrible deaths, nor is such a step imminent.
At this point Joe O has not been added to the list of those whom I want to die horrible deaths, nor is such a step imminent.
Note that space is left open for the adding having been carried out while that sentence was written.
I believe appropriate international agencies have determined that Ogged's cock is not a weapon of mass destruction, and any efffects of its thrust into the fertile cresent will be minimal, even negligible.
So the proposed invasion is unlikely to lead to upheaval in the region?
Odd, the CwOs are pretty scarce on this thread.
did it really take 59 comments for someone to use the term "fertile crescent" in this thread? We are teh sux.
in my mind's eye (or tongue, I suppose), I pronounce the term "C-Wo" and that is how it should be spelled.
And I miss them. Sorry about this thread.
That will teach us to ignore comedy gold like the word "meniscus".
