Oh, this is awesome. People really need to click parts 1 and 2. In my next life, I'm going to be a cop in San Francisco.
Heh -- I love this mode of argumentation every time it shows up. You just want to pat the poor dear on the head and say, "Yes, honey, of course you're much, much prettier than all of those nasty liberals. Honestly, we're all hideous."
This is wrong, but...is the first woman on the pro-life side one of your people, ogged? I think "No," but I can't figure out another category into which she fits better. Afghani?
2: 'But mommmm, they're allowed to go out and I'm not!'
I thought some of the pro-choicers were kind of cute.
I don't think she Iranian, no. Maybe Afghani, or Arab, or half-Arab.
Agree with Cala, but also...don't a lot of the pro-lifers that he photographed look underage? And if so, why is there always something slightly creepy about Red sexuality?
She's a total hottie, whatever else she is. But pro-life, so none of us can boink her, I'm afraid.
some of the pro-choicers were kind of cute.
But so unkempt, darling!
that code pink-er grandma's sign "Every Child a Wanted Child" genuinely warmed the cockles of my scaly little heart.
a democrat who would just do a little authentic positive tub-thumping, or even bible-thumping, about the moral values behind democratic policies could sweep polls. (there's so much room for improvement.)
Gosh... but those pictures really don't tell us anything about the personality, character, or intellect of the women pictured...
unless someone is willing to say that there's some correlation between female physical beauty and intellect, inverse or otherwise...
obviously my beautiful secretary accidentally typed "correlation" where I said "relationship."
3, 5: C'mon guys. Anybody who isn't black, white, or Chinese is Mexican. Everybody knows that.
Jesus, the Mexicans have overrun Iran too.
That's the e-mail forward from World Cup 2002, "Why Brazil beat Turkey", just in reverse.
13 is missing the words "Thanks to" at the beginning of the sentence.
Y'all are trying to give me a stroke, aren't you?
My bitch of a sister-in-law (there are three; this isn't the one some of you met, who is fantastic) has been reading my blog. Today she messaged Mr. B. to tell him that she thinks he should take PK and leave me.
Steam. Ears.
How did she find out about your blog -- from her sister?
Hardly.
Pro-life chicks may wear more makeup, but those of us who love our abortions take way better vacations.
So... this was supposed to be a conclusive thing? At best, there's arguably a slightly higher attractiveness ratio on the pro-life side of this thing, but only if you're really heavily into uninteresting-looking women or 12-year-olds.
It's a fair-minded presentation of the facts, Kotsko. If it were clear-cut, abortion wouldn't be so divisive, would it?
I think that every pairing should get an up or down vote. That's the only fair way to settle this.
On pairing #1, I vote pro-choice.
Why do liberal guys feel superior for preferring unattractive women to attractive women? This should probably be its own post.
Okay, pro-choice #1 looks kind of like someone I used to date (except for the dye job).
My grandma would freak if I brought home a Mexican, particularly one from Iran.
21: I must, regrettably, concur with jackmormon's assessment of the pro-lifer in pairing 1 as a "total hottie," and vote for her.
Frederick, you can vote for her, but you aren't allowed to boink her.
25. Frederick can't, but no woman can resist my Axe body spray.
Prochoice girl #3 might also be a target of my hypnotizing, seductifying odor.
And in the original link, I call dibs on the woman with the bandana over her face. Because I like surprises.
She's a total hottie, whatever else she is. But pro-life, so none of us can boink her, I'm afraid.
You could, JM.
Hey! I kind of look like a significantly less hot version of that chick.
29. Principles, w-lfs-n; always principles.
Silvana, Want to go out sometime, then? It'd be a point of pride for me.
Huh. You do live in Chicago, don't you?
29 seems to be a clear example of matchmaking with ulterior motives.
30. We don't know if you're telling the truth until you post pictures.
I have a picture, but I don't know how to post it without revealing a whole host of other pictures which I'd rather not reveal.
Hard though it is to believe, such a date would be my first with someone I met over the Internet.
Why do liberal guys feel superior for preferring unattractive women to attractive women?
You know, sometimes you do make your mother proud, ogged.
Fine. Minimal mockery allowed. The picture I am sending is admittedly of me slightly drunk.
I'm afraid that after "droit de Weigneur" I can't respect anything at all about you.
Weiner, I don't know if counts as "matchmaking" if one is pimping oneself.
You two should definitely go out; at least for a drink or something. (But don't let your drink out of your sight, silvana.)
In fact, I think it would be just peachy for Silvana and Kotsko to go on a date. In two weeks I'll be taking credit for it.
We'd have to schedule it for when my girlfriend was out of town.
Kotsko is seeing someone, you know.
I don't know why I listen to you people.
But you two should still go out, friendly like. You already know you have stuff in common, and it's not so easy to make friends.
Silvana, you look a bit smashed, but not on alcohol.
And Ogged knows, 'cause he's Mexican.
i'm w/ kotsko on #1. the cute part, not the ex part.
though they do have a point, what w/ all the apparent asians on the evvvvil pro-choice side. yellow peril!
ogged, I think Weiner has the market on matchmaking cornered, and I don't know if pseudo-matchmaking is allowed. Better consult the constitution.
I heartily approve of pseudo-matchmaking and Unfogged meetups, even if I am in no way involved.
This was the last place I expected to be taken seriously, especially when it came to courting behaviors -- weren't all you guys flocking around that 17 year old girl once, for instance?
They probably meant that, though. Perverts.
Too late Kotsko. You two are going out, or you're a cad. Learn to read the signals, man.
You have a moral imperitive, Adam. Your girlfriend may just have to get her own date on the internet.
Um, don't I have any say in this matter? Let us consult the topic o' the day.
Of course you can refuse, Silvana, and at this point you probably should, but Adam has to offer and suffer the rejection.
In all seriousness, my girlfriend is going out of town this weekend, leaving me with nothing to do. Are there any good concerts this weekend?
psst, SCMT -- she didn't say "no takebacks."
T-shirt: I went to Unfogged and all I got was guy with a girlfriend.
And, to 69, I don't know. Probably not. I'd have to look.
Ok, I'm going out now. SCMT SCMT SCMT.
Too bad I didn't make an ass of myself last week, or we could've gone to see Califone (which I did, except not with Silvana).
In short, I suck.
Are there any good concerts this weekend?
Of course you'll have to wait until Thursday for the Reader, but:
Friday · · · · · January 27
======================
* Fallen Empire * Ebonmortis * Ominous
5 PM at One Galleria - 5130 N. Western ($7-all ages)
* Gil Mantera's Party Dream * Alexis Gideon * Technicolour Stallion
10 PM at the Empty Bottle - 1035 N. Western - 773·276·3600 ($8)
* William Perry's Explosion Trio w/ Nori Tanaka, Junius Paul
10 PM at the Velvet Lounge - 2128½ S. Indiana - 312·791·9050
* Jason Stein trio w/ Jason Ajemian, Mike Reed
10 PM at the Charleston - 2076 N. Hoyne - 773·489·4757 (free)
Saturday · · · January 28
======================
* Lobisomem - Brad Loving, Jason Ajemian, Garen Gaston - cd release
8 PM at Caro D'offay Gallery - 2204 W. North - 773·235·7400
* Leonardson-Zerang duo * Soliday-Baker trio
8:30 PM at Enemy - 1550 N. Milwaukee 3rd fl. ($5 donation)
* The Life and Times * The Narrator * The Plastic Constellations
10 PM at the Empty Bottle - 1035 N. Western - 773·276·3600 ($8)
* Jah Wobble & the English Roots Band * Salvo Beta
10 PM at the Abbey Pub - 3420 W. Grace - 773·478·4408 ($15)
* John Goldman Quintet
10 PM at the Velvet Lounge - 2128½ S. Indiana - 312·791·9050
* Language of the Apocalypse
10:30 PM at Hotti Biscotti - 3545 W. Fullerton - 773·772·9970 (donation)
Sunday · · · · January 29
======================
* James Falzone, Marty Metzger, Karen Shulz-Harmon, Rebekah Cope, Tim Mulvenna, Davin Youngs
11 AM at Grace Presbyterian Church, Chopin Theater - 1543 W. Division
* Maja Rathkje * Ingebrigt Håker-Flaten * TV Pow
7 PM at the Empty Bottle - 1035 N. Western - 773·276·3600 ($10)
* Velvet Lounge jam session hosted by Dennis Winslett
8 to 12 PM at the Velvet Lounge - 2128½ S. Indiana - 312·791·9050
* Loose Assembly w/ Josh Abrams, Jason Adasiewicz, Tomeka Reid, Mike Reed, Greg Ward
* Mike Reed, Nicole Mitchell, Jim Baker, Jeff Parker
10 PM at the Hungry Brain - 2319 W. Belmont - 773·935·2118
I don't know anything about Jason Stein or Mike Reed, but Jason Ajemian's a very good bassist, so you should see that on Friday and go to the Hungry Brain on Sunday. Jim Baker, Nicole Mitchell, and Jeff Parker! And that Reed guy. You can call out requests for Tortoise tunes.
I don't know anything about Jason Stein.
Jason Stein revolutionized Lars Helgeson's life.
Maybe you should see Lobisomem, too, and maximize your Armenian bassistry!
"I don't know anything about Jason Stein."
If you look closely, you'll see I'm being misquoted here.
Way to call attention to her unsightly pimple, ogged.
Respect my droit de Weigneur!
Bravo!
Yes, I have a permanent shiny pimple on my nose. It's one of my better features. And it sometimes glints purple in the light. Must be because I'm a witch.
Dimple, dimple, boil and pimple,
Another rhyme is not so simple.
ITYM
Blackheads, whiteheads, shiny pimples
Cloven palates; chins with dimples
GOOOOOOOO TEAM!
L. … what an enchanting young lady you've become.
Hi mom! We'll have L back soon. Don't you fret or nuthin. Just trust us...
She makes it past the n/2 +7 bar for us, we're good!
Shiny, oily dimple
Red, protruding pimple
Lots of vile pus
The mirror makes me cuss
I have to go out tonight
(the girlfriend is gone, just tonight)
but with this ghastly, obscene boil
why bother with wooing toil?"
"My visage is a fright, a loathsome, detestable freak." I sigh
I'll just stay home and cry, cry, masturbate, cry.
Who says you have to stop scanning?
L,
I'm sad to say that Ben's endearing little bitch personality is totally offset by his halitosis and body odor. Matt is a really nice guy. It's a terrible tragedy that he's impotent. Apostropher will make you laugh harder than anyone. Just don't touch him without gloves. If you ever wondered, Weiner, Labs, Ogged, and SCMT are all gay.
L., also: I'm a cad. I was just too busy that day to follow the thread at Unfogged, or else I'd have been all over you.
Hey! My halitosis is mostly under control now!
I told, you, that hardly ever happens! I was nervous, is all.
Why would you woo toil?
You belong to the Woo-Toil Clan, for one.
