Dammit, apostropher. You were the one responsible for the dead chicken porn too, weren't you?
No, that was w-lfs-n (who tried to pin it on Emerson). The result: crabs.
Seriously, has anyone else noticed that comments windows now jump to the front when they finish loading, whereas they didn't do so before? What gives?
Dear, dear god.
I have a really stupid question. This, ah, "material"--an iridescent film shot through with spider webs of mucoid stuff in a curious shade of magenta, rolling in a wave down both thighs. What is he talking about?
I am amused that his blog is called 'blood and treasure.' Owie.
What is he talking about?
Cointreau.
Dude, I'm serious. Don't make me go around googling. What the fuck is this material?
There should be a verb in there somewhere.
I dunno! He talks about it as if it's supposed to be something people are supposed to know, so I figured maybe the scrotally endowed would be able to explain the mystery.
teofilo all Becks-style n' shit.
I read him as explaining something that he doesn't expect prople to know, and indeed doesn't know himself.
14: I've never opened mine up to look.
"People," obviously. I don't know why my typing is so bad tonight.
You are so fucking evil, Apo. I think I'm having sympathy pains.
You mean scrotal explosions weren't what you guys were learning about in 7th grade while we were being taught about the Wonders of Being a Woman?
I don't know why my typing is so bad tonight.
Your blood alcohol level, obvs.
22: No, we were learning about fisting from Ann Coulter.
Well, one class of scrotal explosions, but nothing like what Blood & Treasure describes.
22: Which group did you go with, Cala??
Wait a second. Cala, aren't you of the Y-chromosome deficient variety of human specimen?
Cala is a 47-year-old balding man, just like everybody else.
I got the 'parents pulled me out of all sex ed' one, so I don't know what went on, because they thought that bald men shouldn't learn about the Wonder of Wonders.
Okay, I'm shocked. But I have to admit you didn't miss anything except a free Always pad.
So Sex Ed wasn't sponge-worthy, huh?
And jeebus, this "jump to the front" window thing is driving me up a f&*king tree.
A free Always pad? We didn't get anything in ours. No fair.
Believe me, M/tch, if I could just go down to the corner store and buy a six-pack of beer like in a normal state, I totally would. As it is, I remain beerless, although I did discover some very old liquor bottles in the basement today.
I don't think they like to acknowledge that you can actually put things in there.
a free Always pad
That one of those little notebooks the girls used to write in with their colorful gel pens?
34: Yeah, it's just more evidence of the feminist conspiracy against boys.
Fuck this. I want my free pad. I'd even settle for a Sometimes pad.
I'll send you a menstrual pad, Apo, if you'll send me a storebought cake.
Come to think of it, the juxtaposition there isn't just a coincidence.
I'll send you a homemade cake, if you'll send me a used menstrual pad.
Proof positive that b-wo is a 47 year-old balding Japanese man.
Yeah, sure, Ben. I'll send you a whole wastebasketfull.
46: I want to be the girl with the most cake.
That's a lyric from Cakehole, isn't it?
I want to be the man with the most pads. And gray pubes.
Hmmm, I'm sensing some sort of Tribute Bands potential here, but I can't quite put my finger on it . . .
B, you cake ho!
Hocakes
Hocakes
Hocakes
You are among distinguished company, B.
I'm actually surprised it's not worse.
Back to 2, what if that was really w-lfs-n having sex with the dead chicken and he was secretly pwning us all by linking to it?
By the way, I think the "material" was a result of the Fournier's gangrene.
I would never secretly pwn you all.
Being of the name that I have, I received pads and other feminine hygiene products until I was 17, when they had decided, I suppose, that I'd either decided on a brand or in fact been mocked by every male in the community.
That material, B -- that's what you get when you mix one part jism with two parts pus.
I think this blood & treasures guy deserves the Nobel Prize for grace under pressure. Anybody who can describe his condition in solid prose when his gonads are under vicious attack, and not totally lose his sense of humor either, is some kind of hero. You chicks have no idea what this man went through. It's got to be almost as bad as childbirth.
You chicks have no idea what this man went through.
Does not match up with
It's got to be almost as bad as childbirth.
Ew. And also ow.
when I had my dressing changed this morning, the nurse was pulling cotton wadding from my testicle with all the flair of a kiddies magician pulling strings of handkerchiefs from snotty noses at a birthday party
That one will linger.
This guy's blog is really interesting. I like his entry about Rupert Murdoch in China.
This is what comes of not keeping your essence pure.
We must maintain Purity of Essence.
At the Mineshaft.
Call me "pedant", but is this really "live-blogging"? He's writing about events that happened in the recent past. "Live-blogging" should mean that his scrotum is exploding and he's describing it in real time on his blog.
I could post an entry about how yesterday I got lost in Macy's looking for the shoe department, but I couldn't call that "live-blogging."
We don't tolerate pedantry here, da.
I thought twice about posting that because I thought I might be stepping on w-lfs-n's toes.
Argh. "Thought twice" s/b "hesitated."
The first two posts were real-time blogging of the lead-up to the explosion. The last one, well, I'm willing to give him a pass, as it would be difficult to type with one's eyes rolled back in one's head.
Still a hunter and pecker, huh apostropher?
69: I'm willing to give him a pass, as it would be difficult to type with one's eyes rolled back in one's head.
Yeah, but that's what I was led to expect from the post.
So disappointed.
So disappointed.
Yeah, I get that a lot.
71: Well certainly you're a pecker, but can you touch-type?
And what about dictation?
My Indian manservant does all my typing for me.
Can he do so while his eyes are rolled back in his head?
Damned racist southerners!
Oh! Uh . . . hi Robust! Um, how are you??
If I weren't so busy making a testicle dressing out of these here drapes, I'd take up a pistol in RMM's (and the South's) defense, M/tch M/lls. ;)
Myself, I prefer a lemony vinagrette.
Where the hell is Robust, anyway? I wrote 77 because he said he was on his way over. Sort of the cyber equivalent of baking a cake.
Isn't this an egg salad? If so, we'll have to use mayonaise, LB. Sorry.
I hear the lemon stings, anyway.
The Rocky Mountain variety, you mean.
M/tch, I'm so sorry to be slow in wandering over here. I just can't think of anything to say about this guy blogging his nuts falling apart. I think it's probably because I'm too busy clutching mine and telling them it'll all be alright.
I'm also too stunned by mcmanus telling everyone about his little Rouchambeau (sp?) tournaments in that other thread. I mean, Jesus. My friends and I sought plenty of ways to occupy ourselves, frequently involving genital contact, but never quite like that. Oh, and we did drugs, of course. Just never enough to play a game of 'who can most gently stop Jane from rackin' 'im.'
Oh, and we did drugs, of course.
Sure, "did".
Apostropher, red wine doesn't count.
Actually, I had to take a drug test last week (long story, work related, very disappointed in my employers, etc.). I really wanted to stare down the guy at the clinic and tell him he was a good eight years late on this one, but whatevs.
Eight years? Dude, now that you've passed it, you should come on by the house.
To raid your collection of delecious wines? Anytime. But for other things, not so much.
True story: I quit smokin' dope when I figured out it made playing D&D harder.
We will totally have you and Rah over for delicious wine. Let me check with Roberta for the open night.
Oh, we should have y'all over sometime. Rah keeps saying he wants to do a dinner party, we just keep not finding the time. That's not me saying no, though, just saying that if you beat us to an invite we're going to owe you two of our own.
mcmc: Hell yes.
"It's the Gelatinous Cube!!!"
"Dude, man. It's just a jello shot."
"Dude, this shit is total shake. My druid is totally going to rebuke plants on your ass."
Oh, we should have y'all over sometime.
