The female orgasm is the natural mechanism by which men assert dominion over women
This is surely true, and why, in the interest of autonomy and equality, I never get a woman off. I'll take my praise off the air, ladies.
Ogged, why are you encouraging this posting behavior by responding to it? Didn't we all agree that the best way to help FL beat his addiction was to studiously ignore the subsequent posts?
strenuous, battling sex.
Sadly, this makes me think of He-Man and Man-at-Arms.
If you google the guy's name, this page comes up first, and it has this great description of his new novel: "I’m a monster shagger, me, and Asian don’t you know, which makes the explicit descriptions of my screwing blonde birds all the more revolutionary." A great shtick, I'm sure. I wonder what the deal is with his wife.
Ah, she's a columnist who apparently complains about him to make her living. Sweet!
Not trying to curry favor with women or anything, but I hope she cuts off his dick.
Note that their marriage is also their chief subject matter.
Why does Unfogged keep trying to make me sad?
Dear Editors,
I never thought it would happen to me, but my wife found out about me cheatinng and I said "Who's the boss?" and she gasped "You are!" after I enticed it out of her with my enormous schlong.
That is all.
And yet there's the kitten.
God, now that I've read her column, they seem to deserve each other.
Is this why two years ago I spent £20,000 booking the whole of Babington House for our wedding, and wore a cream made-to-measure Robinson Valentine trouser suit, and £450 Bottega Veneta shoes with rhinestone-encrusted heels, and agonised over whether the cake was organic chocolate ganache or autumn berries, or the flowers creamy English tea roses or arum lilies?
No. You did those things because you're shallow and vain.
sounds like the marriage is doing great:
I ask him questions and he pretends not to hear me. I am watching telly and he turns over without a word. I get his back in bed. I had more sex when I was dating, which, considering my track record, must be grounds for divorce. The last time we did it was on Christmas Eve. Is he having an affair, or has he just gone off me, or both? I really don't know, and I can't bring myself to ask.
Ogged, as a man of the East, can you inform we men of the West how we have gone awry?
11: Yeah, that just occurred to me too. If it is, props to them. But if not, I still hope she cuts off his dick.
Just read the archives, my little strasmangelo.
Wait, Cala, weren't you at the meetup? Is it over? Where's my gossip?
I wasn't at the meet-up. But your gossip is probably in Weiner's pocket.
"I am true feminist." It may not have the formal structure of "all cretans are liars," but it's close. Compare: "I am a true friend of the Jews."
Hilarious, baa. Elijah Milgram has this line about how "true" sometimes acts as a negation operator, e.g. "true self" "true interests" are definitely not your self or your interests.
You should never ever read anything from the Daily Mail. It is evil, and everything in it is guaranteed to offend and infuriate. Even the weather. Stay pure, just say no.
a sweet picture of Ogged
Heck, it looks like Ogged is almost ready to start dancing again.
It may not have the formal structure of "all cretans are liars,"
People who want you to believe that "all cretans are liars" is paradoxical (when uttered by a cretan) should be watched closely, because they do not have your best interests at heart.
I like this morning's Recent Comment sidebar. Like a little poem.
Food people!
Tony Fucking Danza!
Food people!
Food people!
McCain's Unstoppable?
Food people!
McCain's Unstoppable?
Tony Fucking Danza!
I might put another "Food people!" between the last two lines, but otherwise very nice. the half rhyme between "people" and "unstoppable" gives it resonance, and the call and response format gives it great energy.
I'd imagine that when two people this self absorbed start fucking they'd create a black hole from which not even Nirpal's giant schlong could escape, much to the woe of the blond birds of London.
If people could fuck other people into submission, why aren't chicks ruling the world?
Isn't it easier for a chick to fuck a guy's brains out than for a lad to fuck a chick's brains out?
Kinda-sorta-tangentially related: Beware the Oriental fantasy
Isn't this column an old Eddie Murphy routine? I think it's from Delerious: "Yeah, baby, I fucked her, but I make love to you." Murphy does the same 'controlling women through orgasm' bit too.
30: Terrifying. I wrote a comment last night based on that very same Eddie Murphy joke, and then decided not to post it. Female brother from another mother, and all that.
What a douchebag (of patriarchy!). I do suggest, though, that folks read her column on him. He comes off a whole lot less manly and in control there, and that he clearly married a clinically insecure bundle of neuroses sort of puts the lie to his schtick. Indeed, you'll see many more compliments for her in his grotesque exposition than for him in hers.
Can you imagine running into them at parties? "So, Liz, I hear you've been fucked into submission-- how's that working out?"
Hee! "So, Nirpal, are you and Liz having sex again? Have you given any more thought to your mom's question about whether you're gay? Because, you know, that might explain a lot."
"I think I annoy him, to be honest"
I don't even live with her and she annoys the hell out of me.
That column was bizarre. I almost don't believe it's for real.
I can't even handle 33. Ogged's Mom - come tell me about Lebanon!
Has a female orgasm ever been caused by a cock, of any size?
baa -- your statement about "I am a true feminist" is restricted to men, right? As for "a true friend of the Jews," the Troll of Sorrow once said that although he found male Jews distasteful, he didn't mind the "She-brews."
Has a female orgasm ever been caused by a cock, of any size?
Not by yours, I gather.
This does raise the question of, if he is not, in fact, the boss, who is?
Actually, damnit, that question was already answered. Shame on me.
"No cocks have caused orgasms," when uttered by me, is structurally identical to "All Cretans are liars."
your statement about "I am a true feminist" is restricted to men, right?
I say no. Though I have to say, it seems to be mostly men who praise Christina Hoff Sommers as a "true feminist" in those exact words.
And here I'd always thought Charles was in charge...
[rimshot]
And Ezra puts in his order, and asks for his favorite waiter...at the Mineshaft.
Opponents beware, opponents beware-- I'm coming!
The female orgasm is the natural mechanism by which men assert dominion over women
Ten to one his wife is faking it. Make that 100-1. Her column pretty much shows how appallingly, neurotically [bordering on psychotically] desperate she is/was to be married; it sounds as if she'll do almost anything to maintain that state. Contributing to his studly self-image is probably the easiest thing she has to do. [Alpha male? Please... if ever the phrase 'I'm so glad I'm a Delta' was apt...]
I agree with whoever said they deserve each other. Let's wish them a long, if not happy, marriage and pray to the Flying Spaghetti Monster that they never adopt some poor innocent child whose life will be forever warped.
They work much harder than we do, because they're so frightfully clever.
They're both pretty screwed up, but he's the one who seems hellbent on inflicting their lunacy on a child. I will be praying for his early demise.
after I enticed it out of her with my enormous schlong.
Affectionately known as "Purple Nirpal".
I thought it was pretty low-hanging. "Nirpal" was just looming there for almost a day. Nirpal nirpal nirpal. Is it the heat?
But thanks. If you like, I will nickname the body part of your choice.
53: My philtrum and/or uvula, please.
You didn't ask me , but I humbly offer these suggestions:
Philtrum: Phildo.
For uvula, I must go with Babs.
In a related note, this must make you feel like you are about to puke 24/7.
Okay, I don't care how fuddyduddyish it is to say, that's just fucking stupid.
He has a column in the Evening Standard. I wrote a letter to them a while ago congratulating them, since I thought that after Toby Young had stopped writing "Letter From New York", they would never again find a columnist as self-centred, trivial and annoying. It took them five years but they managed it.
Liz Jones is the editor of British Vogue I think, and a lot of his great big "I am the man" thing has to be seen in the context of the fact that he is basically a house-husband.
Hilzoy's summary of the same column:
Shorter real man: "I do not avoid women, Mandrake; but I do deny them my essence."
Via Vox Day.
There are probably three worse words in the English language -- and I invite y'all to find them! -- but I can't think of any that make me cringe more. Brrrr.
There are probably three worse words in the English language
Hugh Hewitt naked.
Hugh Hewitt naked.
Squelchy, yet turgid. Any others?