I have a humorless urge to note that I'm aware that "too gay" and "too overtly and graphically sexual" are different, just so no one scolds me. Will it stop them? We'll see.
asked if he wanted to become a father, Lynch responded icily: "I had the urge once. But it passed like gas."
That's fucking brilliant.
On the other hand, one of the distressing things about the mainstreaming of gayness is the way that my illusions about the inherent coolness of lesbians keep being challenged:
Last year, a lesbian mother of two, now 6 and 2, complained about a sadomasochistic tableau in a clothing shop window that featured a male mannequin chained to a toilet. "As an adult I find this disgusting," she wrote in an e-mail to city officials. "As a parent I find it unconscionable."
As if children don't just love potty humor.
YouTube link. Salon wasn't giving me the love.
Standpipe, really! There may be children present.
B., I have the same problem. Now that I live in the lesbian neighborhood of Chicago, I have come to the crushing realization that there is almost as high a proportion of annoying lesbians in that population as there is of annoying people in the general population.
Now, back to your regularly scheduled misanthropy with me.
Sil,
You live in Andersonville, right? Is there still a Middle Eastern bakery on the corner of Clark and Foster? I loved that place.
When I lived there, there were so many layers of neighborhood identity, the lesbian stuff really didn't stand out. It was far more middle eastern, with touches of the old sweedish community.
the inherent coolness of lesbians
Yeah, I know cool lesbians, but in general that community has about the same percentage of annoying assholes as any other.
You live in Andersonville, right? Is there still a Middle Eastern bakery on the corner of Clark and Foster? I loved that place.
When I lived there, there were so many layers of neighborhood identity, the lesbian stuff really didn't stand out. It was far more middle eastern, with touches of the old sweedish community.
So the whole Confederate prison aspect is basically paved over. Or am I on the wrong track here?
Can we salvage the cool lesbian theory by arguing that cool lesbians are much cooler than cool non-lesbians?
How about cool lesbians are much cooler than cool non-lesbian women?
Definitely true. And since women, lesbian or no, are way cooler than men, we're good.
Comity.
So are you guys saying lesbians are frigid?
11: Is this your version of the "White Negro" thesis?
Lesbian negroes are also cooler than lesbian non-negroes.
I would argue that any lesbian is cooler than the person they would be if they were not a lesbian. Lesbianicity always adds a layer of cool, but for many people it is simply not enough to make them cool in general.
Oh yeah, the converse is also true, any non-lesbian would be cooler by some small margin, if only they were a dyke. This is also true for men, although there are obviously more transformations you have to imagine before the person becomes a lesbian.
Lesbians frigidity: My bi ex-wife claimed that sexual excitement was much less important among lesbian couples than among straight or gay male couples. She was in a position to know. Most of Portland Oregon is a lesbian neighborhood.
more transformations
Not in the case of a straight man: straight woman to lesbian is one transformation (sexual preference), straight man to lesbian is also one transformation (equipment).
19: I have heard some gay women assert this as plain fact, while others deny it quite vociferously.
Isn't Moira our resident expert here?
Can we possibly make the word "dildo" appear in larger type on my screen when I load the unfogged main page? There are still one or two people in my office who don't think I'm shopping for sex toys.
Joe, is your new apartment near LaGuardia?
Ish. It's in Manhattan, right by the 59th St. bridge (hello, lamppost...). But I'm closer to LaGuardia than almost everyone else in Manhattan.
Yeah, I live in Andersonville. The Middle Eastern Bakery is still there and is the shizzle, but its license was suspended last Monday for health code violations.
Oops.
I'll still be going there when it opens back up, though.
In other food news, I am cooking an actual Dinner for a Boy this evening. We'll see how that goes.
24: When you get a chance, watch the clip.
Hey, what happened to the "Unfogged Special Dildo Edition" banner?
We live in the heavily-gay city of West Hollywood, where things are not nearly as explicit as in SF, but there are a couple of leather sex shops around with occasionally ornate window displays.
My son's grandparents came to visit when he was about 10 and took him out somewhere - he assured me upon their return that he had distracted Grandma when they "drove past that bondage store so Grandma wouldn't freak out".
The people complaining about something that was there before they moved in to the Castro remind me of those who move next to an airport and whine about the noise from the planes.
Hey, what happened to the "Unfogged Special Dildo Edition" banner?
We're gentrifying.
30: watch the clip. The airport comparison is in there already.
So what makes the dildo so special in this edition?
Hey, do you know what people moving into the Castro and complaining about the gay people remind me of?
I can't read all of the new hover text—I only get part of the word after p.s.—but I do know that "Journalism" is spelled with an "a."
The people complaining about something that was there before they moved in to the Castro remind me of those who move next to an airport and whine about the noise from the planes.
Now that sounds hauntingly familiar.
True fact: there's a town named Dildo in Newfoundland.
I have a friend from Newfoundland who passed through it on a road trip with his parents, and the parents kept saying things like, "should we stop and have lunch in Dildo?" Totally straight, like they didn't know what a dildo was. Friend, who was about 12, tried really hard to keep from bursting into laughter.
That sounds like Newfoundland all right.
[Cue special Canadian PC]
so i immediately type Dildo, Newfoundland into Google Earth and discover that it is not very big.
You really have to check out that link. This is priceless: "Every year Dildo celebrates Canada Day and our own Traditional Dildo Days. These events are held on the swimming pool grounds where there are many activities, such as games, swimming, hot dogs, cold plates, and much more."
There was a sex-accessories shop in Hillcrest (the gay suburb of San Diego) with the most fun window displays. Every week, the tableau would change--this week doctor-bondage fantasy, that week Satan's whip-wielding minions, you know--but every tableau had a cucumber, somewhere. I call that family-friendly fun.
41: You want your dildo to be big enough. There is such a thing as too big,
I didn't watch the clip; I saw the Daily Show bit when it aired. For some reason, I remembered the comparison as being like people who moved near chicken ranches bitching about the smell.
I used to live in Irvine, a "planned" community, where people complained about the nearby El Toro air base all the time. Admittedly, it was unnerving when they did loud flyovers at 3am, but, hell, it wasn't as if the place wasn't obvious to house-hunters.
Traditional dildo days are so nicer than these modern dildo days.
I do know that "Journalism" is spelled with an "a."
But "Journey" isn't.
I guess "*smacks forehead*" is redundant.
Lesbianicity always adds a layer of cool
I thought it was supposed to add a layer of hott.
sexual excitement was much less important among lesbian couples
Stands to reason, what with there being no man there to give them real pleasure.
19/53: Yet there are always complaints about lesbian bed-death in the advice columns...
I initially typoed "lesbian" as "lesiban", which struck me as either a description of anti-dyke activities or a strict cult of prim women-who-love-women. My blood sugar is clearly too low.
For those of you in want of dildo poetry.
Dude, if you can now afford a home big enough for two kids in the Castro, you can just shut the fuck up as far as I'm concerned. I would LOVE to be able to raise a family in the Castro. Even post pop it's going to be nigh unreachable on any kind of writer's salary.
Or really anywhere around here for that matter.
