There's one born every minute. Take the cocktail.
And Ezra's sometime idea of a beautiful woman with whom to converse was also, you know, a lesbian.
And for heaven's sake, of course take the drink and don't sleep with them. Are you implying that were you heterosexual, you'd have to sleep with them if you took the drink?
She seems like she's trying to be empathetic, but she imagines the men operating with the crassest and most ungentlemanly motives.
You say "crass," I say standard. Whatever. Doing things like buying drinks is something like throwing your bread out on the water; hope for the best, but expect nothing. Insofar as none of the lipsticks are tooling a guy, it's fine.
Damn it, 2 beat me to it. If you were straight, you'd be under no duty to sleep with him, even if he did buy you a nice cocktail. You wouldn't be wrong to accept the drink even if you weren't looking for a bar hookup. So drink up and enjoy.
Shorter: we straight prudes can get drinks, so can everyone else.
Accept the drink and then throw it in their faces, shouting "how dare you, you pig!"
I've often been attracted, that is personally, to people who turned out to be lesbians, sometimes knowing that's what they were, sometimes not. And always would have wanted to follow my interest. I'm guessing Moira's wonderment comes from this behaviour in this venue. I might take her to lunch as a co-worker, for instance, but in a place like that, her expectation that people will be more focused, on hooking up if you will, seems to be reasonable.
I think it'd be acceptable to take the drinks provided that, once per drink offer, she reminds the guy that she's not going to sleep with him. It's possible the guys just wanted to see the girls making out with each other, which is slightly less crass IMO than angling for the threesome.
All I know is that I never accept drinks from guys I'm not somewhat open to talking with.
6: I'm rarely attracted to heterosexual women.
8: Yeah -- while taking a drink doesn't put you under any particular obligation, it seems off to me if you have absolutely no interest in socializing with the guy.
I never accept drinks from guys I'm not somewhat open to talking with.
Okay, but we've stipulated exclusively homosexual, not exclusively homosocial.
Since everyone knows lesbians are the best (mostly), I'm surprised that the protocol for drinks-bought-for-you-by-non-club-members isn't well established at this point.
Nothing saying you're not open for socializing, just not going home at the end of the night, which shouldn't be the assumption anyway.
Whenever I go to a gay bar, men buy me drinks. Why is this? I don't understand what the motivation would be. At first I figured it was to go through me to get with whatever gay man I'm there with, but it happens even when I go to one with Mark when he's obviously coupled and there with his boyfriend.
Buying drinks from a distance is different from walking up and asking "can I buy you a drink?" The former, accept with absolutely no obligation. With the later, acceptance implies a willingness to socialize for at least a couple of minutes.
But certainly not handjobs. Maybe a butt rub though....
An attempt to be welcoming and friendly to someone who might feel a little out of place, filtered through ironic playing with standard gender roles? I dunno.
I don't know why I'm even in this conversation; come to think of it, I can't remember anyone I didn't know ever buying me a drink.
Isn't the whole drinks for conversation thing a bit weird in the first place? Starts out the whole interaction on the "man has the money, woman has the charm and beauty" track. Also, grownups pay for their own stuff, isn't having your socialization subsidized by strangers a bit infantalizing? Sure it's fine to occasionally be treated to things, but only in the context of inviting someone to do something beyond their means, or in the context of buying a round now in the expectation that the other person will buy a round later.
At first I figured it was to go through me to get with whatever gay man I'm there with, but it happens even when I go to one with Mark when he's obviously coupled and there with his boyfriend.
Umm, because they're happy, they like you, and they want you to have the same good time they're having. I've bought drinks for guys I didn't know.
"Isn't the whole drinks for conversation thing a bit weird in the first place?"
No. Free drinks.
I've bought drinks for guys I didn't know.
You're not slipping that past anyone, you big homo.
19: Yeah, I'm largely with you on that. But I never got the hang of all sorts of normal social interaction, so who am I to judge.
16: Except for the whole in love with Mussolini thing.
21: Dunno. Maybe, but I don't go to gay bars all that often.
I don't go to gay bars all that often
My god, he's Ted Haggart.
$17 drinks? Where is that, the SoHo Grand?
I say boo on 19. There's nothing wrong with playing the grownup game of flirting and pretending to be in a 1940s movie.
Though I can't remember if anyone's ever bought me a drink, either. Damnit.
28 yes, but can you cure him in under three weeks?
Tim's been holding out on us with the crystal meth. I hope you brought enough for the whole class, Reverend.
32: You have to earn it, big boy.
Also I've bought strangers drinks before. It's fun. You're just warming someone up. It doesn't need to be someone I've got any romantic interest in, it's just light-hearted and friendly.
Ezra Pound was a wise man, people
Unfogger, please.
31: It depends on how we cut him up. Virginia hams are supposed to be cured 7 days per inch of cushion depth, or 1-1/2 days per pound.
Gulp. Can anyone tell me where I can find the rest of that Pound? It sure is pretty/wise.
The one and only time a stranger bought a drink for me, I went to the bar and ordered a Tanqueray and tonic. Dude standing next to me said he was a Tanqueray salesman and ordered me their new fancy gin (and tonic).
30: Nor anything wrong with subverting that 40s movie by buying him a drink flirtaciously for the second round.
36: Are you going to suggest that he isnt already salty to the taste?
I turned down so many drinks during my nightclubbing years (19-22, approximately); I did accept a few, though. The guy buying the unknown woman a drink is part of a really reactionary---and often predatory---game. Not one I enjoy playing.
Drinks don't cost anything like 17 dollars at the SoHo Grand; I was there recently.
15: At first I figured it was to go through me to get with whatever gay man I'm there with, but it happens even when I go to one with Mark when he's obviously coupled and there with his boyfriend.
The second wouldn't nullify the first. Also FWICS there's a fair amount of consciously-exaggerated gender-role playfulness and spoofing in those contexts. So they could be ironic drinks.
Disregard request, Google returned the title right away.
grownups pay for their own stuff
This is where I'm coming from. I don't really like accepting drinks from guys I *would* want to socialize with, and I wouldn't dream of taking one from a straight chick without making it very clear that I was a dead end street for her. Of course, there is another context of buying rounds for friendly strangers, but you can usually tell which is which.
Like B, I'd think that there was a standard protocol for this amongst the lesbians. I'm friends with a whole bunch (I've been looking for a collective noun for lesbians... whattya think of "a pride of lesbians?") so I'll have to bring it up next time we're hanging out.
39: Of course not. Or the first round, for that matter.
34: Likewise, but it's always seemed to me to be very much part of the whole "and now I chasing you!" dynamic. There are contexts where this is okay, but there are also people who are clearly made uncomfortable by it, and that makes sense to me.
46: But then you told me that I owed you and got mad when I wouldnt put out!
Of course, there is another context of buying rounds for friendly strangers, but you can usually tell which is which.
I think that's the key. You can usually tell what the intent is. Once you know the intent, try not to be a dick. But there isn't a need for some rule about the general case.
48: You wish.
45: Pride is too patriarchal, and also way, way too retro-70s. I vote a snatch of lesbians.
I confess I have never bought anyone I didn't know a drink, unless it was part of a general "round for the table." So I don't know what I'm talking about.
I like a "snatch" of lesbians (someone else suggested a "labia" of lesbians), but I want something I'm not afraid to actually say in front of them.
I can see the patriarchy objection for pride, but it is kind of fitting since when we're out, it's usually one guy (me) and a mess o' women. And "way too retro-70's," I can't imagine what that could mean.
I confess I have never bought anyone I didn't know a drink, unless it was part of a general "round for the table." So I don't know what I'm talking about.
You're wearing a sweater right now, aren't you.
50: Now I feel so cheap and tawdry.
As far as the original topic, they were at a bar or nightclub, right? Where people pay for overpriced drinks to stand around?
Isnt there some assumption of the risk that alcohol will be used as a greeting card?
I confess I have never bought anyone I didn't know a drink
Neither have I.
42: don't they have some kind of 15 buck marguerita?
52: hahahahaha
that might be a keeper
I'm not so sure that in a bar setting (dark, loud) I could discern the difference between the "I'm pretending to be in a 40s movie, baby" drink offer and the "I'm into traditional gender roles, baby" drink offer.
Not that I've ever had either, to my recollection.
Am I the only one with experience of this?
Way back in college a friend of mine decided that men who hang out with lesbians (that is, the masculine of 'fag hag') should be known as 'lez beaux', sing. 'lez beau'. It's great, but completely incomprehensible when spoken out loud.
"way too retro-70's,"
The whole "pride" thing. I mean, pride is good and all, but rainbow flags just always remind me of my 70s childhood.
60 the type of bar probably helps....
Ezra Pound was a wise man, people
For example, and this is totally blinking the whole fascism / anti-Semitism thing.
You're wearing a sweater right now, aren't you.
No. But aren't you having enough issues without asking a man what he's wearing right now?
Holland? How about a flood of dykes? Plus, you know, it's got that whole double entendre thing going on.
rainbow flags just always remind me of my 70s childhood.
and... this is... a bad thing?! So like, you'd be down on Evil Kneivel too?
I don't think I understand you at all.
58: Not that I noticed; everything seemed the normal sort of expensive. But maybe there was some menu item I missed
Am I the only one with experience of this?
What, lesbianism?
68: I don't have a lot of nostalgia for the pop culture of my youth, no.
I normally operate under 19, even on the few and far between date-like situations I get into. If anything, I tend to pay for people more just b/c I'm like that. What I find strange about the situation is not the gender/drink dynamics, but the loud crowd of strangers dynamics. Who can talk much inthose environments anyway, lusty or not? But I'm deeply dissatisfied with the state of most clubbery.
I think Ogged is right and Ezra Pound is right and sometimes it's just hard to really believe a certain kind of warmth that goes beyond the drinks-for-company exchange--evenif one exudes it freely. For me, anyway, it's a bit of a novel idea that I might ever fall into the "pretty woman he'd just like to hang out with" category with enough oomph to inspire the spending of serious money. Someone took me out on a fake date not so long ago---it was very clear by the time the date happened that neither of us was remotely interested in any kind of liasion or romantic relationship. And it was like, ridiculously nice. I mean, wow. And I was a little baffled, but as I've gotten to know him, I've realized it just gives him an extreme amount of pleasure to to go to nice concerts and restaurants, to do this with girls he likes, and to behold them dressed up. If they don't make enough to pay for half of that, he'd rather treat them then tamp it down. I guess what's unfortunate is that girls tend to make less and tend to receive this rather than feel free to dole it out. I fucking love it when my posse gets into black tie, and I've been known to buy them drinks in sheer appreciation of how wonderful they look when they clean up. No lust, just delight in their company and delight at how great they look.
There was this great quote about Bogart, from John Huston's eulogy, about how he plied a guest with alcohol, but it wasn't so much the alcohol as the sheer good will that left a person with a full heart by the end of the evening.
But aren't you having enough issues without asking a man what he's wearing right now?
You say "issues," I say "freedom from labels and society assigned roles." Feel the freedom, baby.
lez beaux
As in , "lez beaux do cabaret"?
I reject your pity and condescension.
Everyone knows the over 19s are past their do by dates.
a novel idea that I might ever fall into the "pretty woman he'd just like to hang out with" category
[pun on Ile's real name and link to picture of her looking ridiculously hott redacted].
Am I the only one with experience of this?
No...
Hey 19's, that's Arethra Franklin.
62: The masculine-lesbian-following counterpart of "fag hag" is "dyke tyke".
Er, perhaps for minimum ambiguity that should have been "lesbian-following, masculine".
Uh, if 79 is a discretion error, let me know and I'll redact it.
A guy walks into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting alone. He says, "Can I buy you a drink?"
She replies, "Yes, but it won't do you any good."
Later he asks, "May I buy you another drink?" "Yes," she responds, "but it won't do you any good."
After a few drinks, he decides to ask her to his apartment. Again, she replies, "Yes, but it won't do you any good."
In his apartment he turns to her and says, "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. I want you for my wife."
She replies, "Ohhhhh, THAT'S a different story!! Bring her on out!!!"
"I think it'd be acceptable to take the drinks provided that, once per drink offer, she reminds the guy that she's not going to sleep with him."
Girls telling your "I'm not going to sleep with you" usually means they're thinking about it, and trying to slow themselves down. Its usually a good sign if you're wanting sex, unless there's disdain followed by walking away.
"Isn't the whole drinks for conversation thing a bit weird in the first place? Starts out the whole interaction on the "man has the money, woman has the charm and beauty" track."
this is why i buy drinks for guys i meet sometimes, but don't buy them for girls until they've bought me, or we play rock paper scissors or something.
84: It was very sweet, but maybe that's a good idea. :-)
76: Be like that if you must, but I certainly wouldn't give up my memories of, say, Ella Fitzgerald on Sesame Street for anything.
until they've bought me
How much do you cost?
Let's not forget that I am just cheap enough to enjoy watching some guy liquor up my GF for me, and the fact that it was at such a straight meat market only made it better - this being the Redwood Room at the Clift Hotel. Weird place. The paintings on the walls are actually video screens of people sitting in a portraiture style, i.e. eyes slightly averted, posed just so, etc. And the drinks were ridiculously overpriced.
If the drinks hadn't been so pricey, I doubt I would have felt such a pang of guilt about it. $20 worth of beers is one thing, but a couple of guys dropped a hundred bucks, easy, on our drinks.
lez beaux
We used "Dutch Boy" in my day.
89: I didn't say all of it. I don't remember that, though, unfortunately. Off to youtube....
Girls telling your "I'm not going to sleep with you" usually means they're thinking about it, and trying to slow themselves down.
Ugh.
I've realized it just gives him an extreme amount of pleasure to to go to nice concerts and restaurants, to do this with girls he likes, and to behold them dressed up. If they don't make enough to pay for half of that, he'd rather treat them then tamp it down.
This is something I'll definitely do, mostly with my female friends (though some of my guy friends are also up for it). I just love going to nice dinners, and there's no way I could ever rationalize doing it by myself. Plus, good company makes the night amazing.
Part of the reason I'm so willing to pay is because I graduated before nearly all my friends, and most of them are now in grad school while I'm working, so it really is easiest for me to just pick up the tab.
I should go out and try to get people to buy me drinks.
91: Whatever, Moira. Let 'em throw their money around competing to see if one of 'em can get the gay chicks to make out.
Oh, and it's a clitoris of lesbos, with the emphasis on the second syllable: cli-TOR-is.
Jeez, no wonder nobody can find us.
87: How about "I'm a lesbian and I'm not going to sleep with you?"
Of course, Feynman said that you should just ask "before I buy you a drink, I want to know if you'll sleep with me tonight." He claims that this is much more effective than buying drinks. He was one sketchy nobel laurate.
There's something to be said, if you're going to be sketchy, for being affirmatively and openly sketchy.
98: No good, because obviously that just means she hasn't met the right kind of man yet.
one sketchy nobel laurate
Henry Kissinger, on the other hand, totally above-board in every way.
Two, TWO sketchy Nobel laureates! Ah hahahahah!
Christ, it takes forever to get in and redact a comment now. Anyhow, done.
98: All variations on those sorts of comments just amuse and annoy me. There's no expectation of sleeping with somebody! It just seems to reflect poorly on the drink recipient's opinions of people like the buyer on the basis of their appearance alone.
Now, if you politely explain that you're with someone (friend or otherwise) and can't really talk, that's a perfectly good reason the buyer needn't pay for any more of your drinks. If you can talk with them, perhaps your ongoing relationship or sexual orientation can be subtly slipped in and they should take equally subtle notice. That way everyone wins, and friendships are made!
That's so funny, I was just literally googling that Feyman piece....here's a bootleg copy.
Yeah, the number of the day must be higher than two.
oof. 10 demerits to me for misuse of the word "literally"
Cerebrocrat, you were lying to me, weren't you? There's no Ella Fitzgerald on Sesame Street. And now I am really sad.
I still like Feynman. Certainly a lot better than I like Kissinger.
109: much, much higher. Even counting only the peace prize winners (granted, that's a solid majority) '94 was a bumper year.
106: subtlety's hardly the thing for drunken mating rituals.
99 -- only half-off-topic, but has anyone ever read Feynman's letters? The last one he wrote to his first wife, Arline (pp. 68-69, if you have a copy or if you can see inside it on Amazon), is totally not-sketchy and makes me nearly-cry every time I read it. Perhaps this is too earnest for Unfogged.
There's also a weird letter of recommendation for Stephen Wolfram, in there.
XKCD for the win.
But regarding the Redwood Room - anyone who goes there is going to expect to drop a hundred bucks or two on drinks. I wouldn't even worry about it for a second. If you went to some divier bar and some guy bought a hundred bucks of top-shelf whiskey shots or something, maybe, but there? Feh.
XKCD for the win.
But regarding the Redwood Room - anyone who goes there is going to expect to drop a hundred bucks or two on drinks. I wouldn't even worry about it for a second. If you went to some divier bar and some guy bought a hundred bucks of top-shelf whiskey shots or something, maybe, but there? Feh.
112: sure, but that's hardly a contest. Feynman was flawed; Kissenger, well....
He was one sketchy nobel laurate.
He liked to sketch strippers too.
Actually, seriously, he did all his famous womanizing in a particular phase between wife 1 and wife 4, and I've always had to forgive him, as an icon, slightly, b/c the death of wife 1 was so unbelievably sad and he was so very young. In Genius Gleick quotes this letter he wrote to her and then hid well after she died (right in the middle of this womanizing phase), and it's one of the saddest bits of prose I've ever read.
Here's what I don't get though: I get that men like to watch women kiss, etc. But on various occasions I've made out with various women (ahem, those days are over) in mixed bars and we've BEEN INTERRUPTED by some DUDE who has wandered over to say something - ANYTHING - to us.
Why why why? I get that our kissing each other is a show for you but (she sputtered) why do you stop the show?
LB & JM are klling me. Speaking of womanizing math whizzes!
Apo, your chivalry is duly noted. Let me buy you a drink next time you're in SF. :-)
Yes, the whole Arline thing is I think the key to Feynman. He has this heartless bastard persona going, but I think it's partly about Arline and partly about the bomb -- she died while he was at Los Alamos -- and I think they're combined.
120: Because, dude. The only thing hotter than two chicks making out is two chicks paying attention to me!
I think it's the little preface given by his daughter (the editor) that really breaks me down. Every time.
I'm going to have to qualify my earlier comments about accepting drinks paid for by a stranger because I think it has a lot to do with context.
In California, I wouldn't really hesitate to take a drink; I know all the social cues and feel like, well, more than a match for mosst Californian men. In your average decently lit pub almost anywhere in the world, I would most likely take it and pay a round later on. In a NYC club, I probably would not take it, but maybe. In any Parisian club or bar or cafe, oh hells no.
120: Because the goal here is The Threesome. If he doesn't try to talk to you, he has zero chance at The Threesome. If he catches you just as you're getting turned on from the smooching, and his Manly Presence reminds you that, actually, you wouldn't mind a bit of The Cock tonight, he's got a nonzero chance at The Threesome.
And the thing with the Challenger was really a case of the times finding the right man. Not that it did a bit of good, of course.
"A Bit of the Cock" would be a great band name.
120: Well at least for straight girls, part of the lesbian-makeout reason is that one does it for male attention. Its a 'guys i need to get laid tonite' flag. So maybe the dude was hoping get there first.
Or maybe something similar to part of the catcalls cause: seeing women increase social power (via sex in both cases) makes the guys feel out of control and so they need to reassert dominance; and dominance is usually done with speech of somekind. Of course seeing girls make out probably leaves him tonguetied but thats why the feet moved and tongue flapped.
"A bit of the Cock"? But we've got a drawerful at home! (What sad is that that last line, in my head, comes out sounding like John Lithgow.)
130: I was going to say. Never made out with a woman in public as bait myself, but it's certainly something some straight women do.
I read 121 as 'Woman Math Whizzes,' and immediately thought, "where is M. LeBlanc when you need her?"
Baby, those rubber things ain't got nothing on my warm, throbbing . . . (I can't think of a non-stupid word here). Plus, you'd have me.
133,135
I'm around, if you need a cheap runner-up.
134: Given your subject, I doubt he's tried. So how would he know? (.. got nothing on...)
138: If needing to know what one was talking about were a prerequisite for horny guys in meat markets, the entire hospitality industry would suffer a massive depression.
125: Damn, arthegall, you just made me tear up. Man. I'd forgotten some of the gut punches in that.
137: But, but, you aren't interchangable! You're your own unique points of light!
Actually I was just trying to hint that I know something.
139: aw shucks; I'll let you buy me a drink anytime.
To me one of the most memorable parts of Surely You're Joking is when he borrows Klaus Fuchs's car to drive down to Albuquerque when Arline is dying.
This thread was really just a test about how the mere mention of lesbians makes everyone talk.
Well, and the whole elaboration of the Arline story, in "What do You Care What Other People Think," puts a whole, non-obvious spin on that particularly arrogant phrase.
132: And bi women, if you believe in those.
I don't believe in superstars,
Organic food and foreign cars.
I don't believe the price of gold;
The certainty of growing old.
But I believe in bi women...
121: Countess von Backwards is great! Makes me sad that my four year old won't watch Sesame Street with me because she is afraid of the Count.
149: All women are bi. Don't you read the lad mags?
151 is so sad. The Count is the best. One of PK's earlier phrases was "batty-bat."
152: Dear Unfogged: I never thought anything like this would happen to me....
Yes dear, go on. We're listening.
152: Or evolutionary psychology?
111: Man! First condescension, then lying. I am so wounded. It may not be on YouTube, but I trace my still-thriving love of jazz to seeing Ella on Sesame Street, scat singing along with a crowd of big-haired urban children gathered around the piano.
There's definitely a YouTube clip of Stevie Wonder from Talking Book on Sesame Street, playing Superstition while big-haired urban children dance like they've lost their minds. Which of course can happen when it gets that funky.
158: that s/b "from Talking Book era"
126: What's wrong with Parisian cafés or bars?
155: ...so I'm planning to meet up with Condi and Laura again the next time I'm in DC!
Here's a question for the Unfogged lesbian hivemind: I once knew somebody (lesbian) who told me on several occasions that all women are bi with enough effort. (She was talking about her ability to convert "straight" women, definitely not about guys' ability to convert lesbian women.) I assumed she was taking the piss at first, but subsequent actions suggested she was quite serious. Is this a personality type in any way common in lesbian communities, or something way out of the ordinary?
161
Dear Lovelorn In DC,
First, some clarification: You were snorting blow with Laura before or after you mistook Condi for Fergie?
I can see why it was a confusing bender. Tell us more.
Sincerely
Doing the unfogging, one heartbreak at a time.
162: I personally believe that many, many, many people, male and female, who presently identify as monosexual would be bisexual if the culture pushed bisexuality as the norm. Like, my estimate would be over 50%.
Disclaimer: I am not a lesbian.
162: I understand that this wasn't your question. I also don't believe it's in my best interest to try to prove my belief via encouraging conversions.
162 - I have a lesbian friend who pretty much only dates straight women. Successfully in the short run. But I personally think she's subconsciously choosing specific women with whom a relationship couldn't develop and thereby sabotaging herself.
Is this a personality type in any way common in lesbian communities, or something way out of the ordinary?
I think there's a fairly well known stereotype of the weekend lesbian, or the college lesbian, for whatever that's worth.
And I'd agree with 164. See women's colleges for evidence on one side, ancient Greece on the other.
But I've never run into a lesbian who insists she can convert straight women at will.
169: I know women who claim in jest that they can convert any straight woman, and in seriousness that they can convert many/most.
Including at least one who claims remarkable prowess at converting both straight women and gay men.
162: I know one woman like this. She seems to do very well, though she also has pissed off a few straight female friends. She projects more confidence than almost anyone else I know, so that probably helps.
Including at least one who claims remarkable prowess at converting both straight women and gay men.
If "convert" means "sleep with a few times," that doesn't seem that remarkable.
173: It's remarkable if the words "straight" and "gay" mean what most monosexuals pretend they mean.
Yeah, I guess that's right. They're wrong about the meaning, though.
But you make a good point about "convert" vs. "sleep with a few times".
158: Stevie Wonder, I've seen. Fabulous.
164: Bi-oppressor.
Seriously, I suspect that one of the reasons straight women often have a "bi phase" or LUG may be that we're conditioned to please people, go along, etc. No means no and all that, but absent overt manipulation or force, my memories of h.s. and college were that most guys who were sufficiently attentive sooner or later lucked out, simply because one wants to please and doesn't really have a good reason not to....
Or maybe I'm just easy.
160.--The dominant flirting paradigm there seems to be: "if you look at a guy, you're willing to sleep with him."
But who would not be willing to sleep with Rene the French Fighter Pilot?
179: Have you already forgotten that burning sensation, LB?
I think one of the reasons for the LUG stereotype is that lots of people do most of their sleeping around, of whatever sort, when they're undergrads and soon after. Then a good chunk of them, bi or otherwise, get into monogamous relationships and sleep around no more. I may be projecting a little bit here.
For every one René the French Fighter Pilot, there are two hundred Pépés the Louches Salopards Misogynes.
115: wow! I've always respected Feynman as a physicist but thought he was kind of an obnoxious asshole. But that's a different side of him I wasn't really aware of. Unfortunately it's the asshole side that seems to have had a lasting influence on the culture of theoretical physics....
For the record, I used to sleep with a lot of straight women but that was before I was seriously considering getting into a relationship. A friend of mine does that now and somehow always goes home with the only straight chick in the room.
Also, you should note that sleeping with a straight woman is a) bad because they usually don't have a clue what they're doing but is b) awesome because they're not part of the lesbitariat, i.e. you needn't worry about your whoring around getting back to your lesbo friends. Until you get drunk and you see the straight woman out at a bar and you tell your friends, Yeah, I totally hit that.
Can I say again, JM, for someone who doesn't know how to tell a joke, you sure know how to tell a joke?
My blogcrush on Moira really isn't going anywhere, is it?
She's in a relationship, you're a straight man, she's a lesbian... I suppose it depends on what you mean by 'going anywhere'.
There are two readings of that, my heathen friend. Both are probably true.
185.--Not as funny as the green singing herring on the wall joke, slol! I mean, the special Weiner-slolernr rendition of it.
Yeah, it'll only take about $85 worth, given my enviable tolerance (thank you Irish heritage!), during which we shall talk nothing but nonsense as our invisible antennae flutter or purr or whatever.
I would really like some bourbon now.
Bourbon's on me as long as I get to watch you and ogged.
I have bourbon, Moira, and the Irish tolerance. Also, both my wife and ex-wife are here.
I have bourbon, Moira, and the Irish tolerance. Also, both my wife and ex-wife are here.
Sometimes I really do want to have your baby.
What do you call a dehydrated Frenchman?
given my enviable tolerance (thank you Irish heritage!)
I missed out on the alcohol tolerance gene. However, I did get the short gene and the burst-into-flames-in-direct-sunlight gene. I want my money back.
the special Weiner-slolernr rendition of it
Ah, but that was a special magic. A magic we can never have again....
195: I'll bite: I don't know, what do you call a dehydrated Frenchman?
I haven't read any of this thread, but: I have never paid over $12 for a cocktail, and they were pretty fucking great. It is not right to accept a $17 cocktail (maybe if it incorporates champagne and the establishment is otherwise top flight; otherwise, I can't imagine that it would be a worthwhile use of any liquor expensive enough to push the price tag so high), because they are in themselves unjustifiable.
Pierre, I thought you knew.
And drinking won't bring Weiner back, you know.
No, but it can numb the pain. Plus, all cats are gray to the the blind drunk.
"all cats are gray to the the blind drunk" s/b "all sausages are weiner to the drunken cat"
Start a new joke thread. Treat it with care. Give it good humor. Be gentle to squares. Speak some yiddish. Keep out all the trolls and the hacks. Then the Weiner and all of his friends may come back.
as our invisible antennae flutter or purr or whatever
Cold, Moira.
Have you heard about the Jewish guy named Shane Ferguson?
...someone like you cares a whole awful lot, things aren't going to get better, they're NOT.
TRUFFULA TREES.
battybattybattybattybattybattybattybattybattybattybatty bat!
Cala, don't hate on the Lorax.
JM. Pierre. Dehydrated Frenchman. Pierre.
I know the one about the Jewish guy named Ike Ferguson. Is this similar?
Yeah, it probably is pretty similar.
If one is a bartender, giving a drink away—"on the house" even (it's not mine! here! take it!)—is…(a) subtler (b) sleazier (c) other?
Depends on the situation. Bartenders will strategically give free drinks to regular customers, so as to encourage them to keep coming.
I'm not hating on the Lorax. I used to have it memorized, because that was one of the calahoarde's favorite childhood stories to read.
Truffula truffula truffula.
221: Right. "Subtle" was the wrong word. I guess I was asking if this is a noted and acceptable flirting technique, as I've been on both ends of the exchange*, in both gay- and straight-leaning bar crowds.
*exchange of drinks, apo.
Pierre as in "stone"? Pee-er, one who pees?
I think I need to find Standpipe's blog.
*exchange of drinks, apo.
It's charming that you think this is less salacious.
Don't google for the answer, JM. Keep your sense of humor alive!
225: that makes it sound like we're exchanging these drinks via kiss.
Isn't that how the narrator first drinks alcohol in We?
Christ, it is pee-er.
Slolernr, I am so disappointed.
I would feel a bit stupid, were it not for my towering fury!
Don't worry, JM, I didn't get it either. Because when you're dehydrated, you don't pee air at all! It's not as if the bladder fills up like a helium balloon, although, come to think of it, that would make for some very squeaky peeing.
When I was abotu six, my (now-late, RIP) grandfather used to tell that joke and then laugh so much he choked. Then, when I got to college, my roommate told me the same joke within like the first week I was there. I knew then freshman year would be fun.
I first thought the punchline would be a pun on Perrier.
220: It's cool, unless the bartender is so pushy that the customer would feel weird coming back if he/she's not interested.
So does the post title imply that most lesbians don't have consciences, or that Moira is conscientious in the particular way that heterosexual people are?