Cosmetic surgery to insert a zipper pocket in your abdomen.
Yeah, same with women's suits. Would it kill them to give me a jacket pocket I could put some stuff in, let alone respectably sized pants pockets?
I've been struck for years by how very, very seldom one sees a woman working out in "whatever," while a good proportion of the men, always including me, seem to be. Is this going to be revealed as yet another form of entitlement/oppression?
(Some suits do have respectable pockets, but you can't count on it. I had a men's blazer I lived in back in college, that looked all sleek and non-baggy, and had pockets that would fit two paperback books without anything hanging out. I loved that blazer. That, and the really short haircut, explained why I couldn't get a date throughout college, but I still loved the blazer. )
3: Pretty much. I do work out in 'whatever', and feel conspicuous doing so.
On the other hand, I can't imagine doing a serious workout with keys and whatnot jangling around on me.
Depends on the workout, doesn't it? Having stuff in your pockets wouldn't hamper lifting weights at all.
6 gets it. The Greeks had the right idea with their nude workouts.
Yeah, I don't want jingly stuff attached to me while I'm engaged in serious strenuous activity. For a walk, whatever, I'm not going to be wearing special clothes, and for machines at a gym, I can always just put my keys on the floor next to me. For outdoor cycling, you can always have suitable racks for attaching your stuff to the bike itself. Running outdoors does seem like the tricky exception.
I had a men's blazer I lived in back in college, that looked all sleek and non-baggy, and had pockets that would fit two paperback books without anything hanging out. I loved that blazer. That, and the really short haircut, explained why I couldn't get a date throughout college, but I still loved the blazer.
LB, it's like you're some kind of lawyerly, East Coastish doppleganger. Although mine was an enormous cardigan that had belonged to my grandfather, and I had a whole array of very, very short haircuts. I also have a ginormous Scandinavian/neanderthal head, so the effect was not a happy one. Indeed, if I had ever grinned as an undergraduate, I'm sure the effect would have been an eerie one. Luckily, I just moped.
LB, it would drive me nuts to sit on my keys or shift the contents of my pockets around every time I changed position. Then again, when I was a kid doing ballet, yoga pants were forbidden as sloppy. So were leg warmers.
Becks, not all fanny packs are created equal. There was a pretty great webbed utility belt trend right around the turn of the millenium; somebody's still got to be making them.
Having stuff in your pockets wouldn't hamper lifting weights at all.
Except when it all falls out every time you do lifts that involve a posture other than standing.
I think for running, the things need to be in different locations so that they don't bulk up so much. ie carry or armstrap the ipod, key on your shoelaces or in that little key-pocket some shorts have, and chapstick...I guess in your sportsbra.
...or pokes you painfully in the thigh when you change position, as JM point out.
10: Put keys on the floor next to you? What a testament to memory skills this statement is. It's taken me years--years--to remember to put my keys back in my bag after using them. When I had a gym membership, I used to sneakily hide my gym bag in a nearby coat rack so that I didn't need to carry anything while working out.
Frowner, I always read your comments in some sort of StrongSad/Eeyore voice, and I get a really big kick out of it.
A lot of the high-tech running pants have wee little built-in pockets (example); mine have an interior pocket just big enough for chapstick and a slim keyset.
Put keys on the floor next to you?
Yeah, that sounds like a disaster in the making.
I don't have a huge set of keys jangling on me. I have a set of "gym keys" that are just the two keys I need to get into my apartment and the little keychain membership card for my gym.
Yeah, that sounds like a disaster in the making.
No doubt, especially because I like to go to the gym from 9-close. I can see myself getting home, realizing I left my keys at the gym, going back and there being nobody there, and being SOL.
18 - But then what do I do with the iPod?
I also have a ginormous Scandinavian/neanderthal head, so the effect was not a happy one.
This is weird. Yeah, that's why it didn't work on me either -- I'm broadshouldered enough that the head the size of a pumpkin is reasonably inconspicuous if you camoflauge it with a lot of hair, but close-cropped I look ridiculous. I miss not owning a hairbrush.
Get one you can strap to your arm? Or forehead?
Becks:
get an ipod case with an arm band.
Get one you can strap to your arm? Or forehead?
What are the prayers when you lay them?
Yeah, that sounds like a disaster in the making.
Do you guys not have lockers at your gym? The key in question is to the locker -- so (a) the staff could let me into the locker if anything went seriously wrong, and (b) I'm hardly going to make it all the way home and then realize that I left the key on the floor (or, depending on the machine, on a flat spot on the machine itself).
17: I've always identified with Eeyore. I haven't watched enough HomeStarRunner to have any opinions there, but I can sing all the verses of "It's the Sneak!".
Now that I think about it, though, one of the things that makes me so valuable as an activist is my ability to see the bad side of things, along the lines of "But it's very unlikely that our protest will actually inspire an uprising and the destruction of capitalism, at least today, so maybe we should have a plan for getting everyone home after the protest." This is highly mileu-specific, of course.
22: Spooky, LB! I didn't even have a comb for parts of college.
I find hats frustrating, since I can only wear stretchy ones owing to the vastness of the head. And those plastic headbands that little girls wore when I was young? Not for me! My head snapped them!
Becks, I have the full size and bought and used the arm strap case for it. It didn't not work, let's put it that way; then, I lost the strap to it, so now when I run I just hold the iPod.
I run on a track in pocketless shorts and my solution's to stash my keys and water under the bleachers. Np.
I don't like having things in my pockets when I work out. iPod should have an armband. No clue on the keys, but if you have a water bottle or something while you're on the elliptical, you could put the keys with the water bottle so you won't forget them.
I like being at a university. Upside: kids tend not to be in matchy workout outfits en masse. Downside: little fuckers are all still in shape. I just realized recently that many of my workout t-shirts are old college t-shirts, and that now some of those are ten years old.
Or you could adopt my fool-proof solution: wear pants with pockets and don't exercise.
I didn't even have a comb for parts of college.
Most colleges part naturally on the left.
You could put the keys in the special compartment that your water bottle has for holding drugs, like Michael Vick.
Becks, this is such a non-problem. Are you passing over pants because you don't look for the little interior pocket JM notes a lot of pants have? And in this day and age, "what about my full-sized ipod" sounds a lot like "but where will I put my boombox?" Get a shuffle or a nano and quit making generation awesome look dowdy.
Oh, as for where to put the key, you can always tie it in your shoelace, which is what I do when I run, even though my workout pants (which, ahem, turned out to be women's pants) have pockets, I don't trust them as much as securing it in my shoelace.
Sure, ogged, and we can solve the key problem by hiding them in the mouths of our mink stoles. Some of us have a budget you know.
And, you can get a little off-brand flash mp3 player for under $30 these days.
Don't listen to Ogg "Anything Else Would Be Uncivilzed" ed: You can't own one iPod for walking and a different one for running.
When at the gym I locked everything in my locker with a combination lock.
Bingo, no key problem.
OT: all the cognscenti are going to be watching Sundance channel tomorrow evening at 10, when John Edgington's "Robyn Hitchcock: Sex, Death, Food, and Insects" is premiering. Here is A lovely anecdote from somebody who watched it in Austin.
I don't think my yoga pants even have the little interior key pocket.
A couple of weeks ago, I was standing outside a friend's place on Broadway right about Houston, and a man and a woman walked by carrying a gigantic boombox playing some crappy staticky beats. I did a triple-take and then was so so happy.
Still seems like a non-problem to me. Why would someone even want their keys jangling about in a pocket while working out?
When I used to run outdoors I used to wear my keys on a cord round my neck (tucked inside my t-shirt to stop it bouncing around too much).
It is certainly true that many pairs of yoga pants lack the little interior pocket. Anyway, I suggest that you check out the options at athleta.com, where there are lots of athletic clothes for women with a bunch of different options regarding pockets or the lack of them.
Can't you just keep that stuff in your briefcase?
I contend that keys bouncing around on a cord around your neck are more jangly than keys in your pocket.
I contend that you have the necessary features to solve that problem, Becks.
re: 48
Really? Not in my experience if the cord is inside a fairly tight t-shirt.
Then again, pockets on men's 'jogging' trousers or shorts tend to be quite large/loose allowing for maximum key-janglage.
50 - Not cotton. I always find those new age fancy fabrics to stew me in my own juices. Oh they claim to be all wicking and whatever...
I play DDR every day, in the comfort of my very own home. I solve the clothing problem by not wearing any. (Except workout shorts. Breasts aren't the only thing that bounce around a lot.)
Well, I don't think it's a non-problem; it's one of the reasons I hate gyms, that whole "now what do I do with my key" crap. I say cord around neck--it's how I carry my phone and keys most of the time. You could even knit yourself a teensy little pocket to put the keys in so they won't jangle. If you've only got two keys, they won't jangle much. Stick the chapstick in your sock or something. Or you can put the keys on a big diaper pin and pin them to your clothes. Or the spiral wristband key thing, though you'd still end up holding the iPod.
Not cotton.
I was trying to steer you to the one true path.
You carry your phone on a cord around your neck??
She's going to tell you that it's the "hippie" solution.
Cotton is more important on top, I'd argue.
re: 54
Yeah, but I still don't get how 'stick it in a locker' isn't a solution?
[Or, for that matter, why not buy a pair of men's workout trousers with pocket, in a small size]
Henry Needle wants a word with you all.
60 - the question is, is she exercising at a gym? Or outdoors on a jogging path or park or something?
Yeah, Becks, get some yupped-up fabrics already.
Oo, I like the first pants linked in 59.
62 - And, to answer, half the time I go to the gym and half the time I'm in the park by my apartment. More options for lockers, etc. at the gym than in the park.
Hmmm...although the pants linked in 59 cost $59 each while an iPod shuffle costs $79. Grrr...
Try the Land Sport by Amphipod.
Or try the satellite.
At first I thought that the idea of this thread was to get me to not read it so people could talk about me, but no.
For a time, I used to tie my key in the drawstring of my pants while walking. That worked pretty well, although if it were multiple keys it might not.
56: Yes, I do.
57: No, it's the upper middle class suburban stay at home mom solution.
71: That's what I do with rings while weightlifting.
I put the key on my shoelace. Well, tucked into the criss-crossy bit.
Yo! I have returned from my travels in Egypt. America, fuck yeah.
I need three keys to get inside my apartment. It really should be four, but we don't use the top bolt.
Welcome back to the land of cold efficiency, leblanc!
It's so weird to be back. Chicago is so...quiet.
"It seems like everything is moving towards a pocketless yoga pant"
Pant? Singular? Damn you, Carson of Queer Eye.
re: 81
And the word is 'trousers', anyway. Damned colonial language-manglers ...
But the word "trouser" is only found in the singular when combined with the word "snake".
Oh, as for where to put the key, you can always tie it in your shoelace
And if you make the key integral in the knot, you can even do this on the Sabbath!
And I'm not wearing a fanny pack
Good to know. What else aren't you wearing?
Probably no Viking helmet either.
Not an extra in a Capital One commercial, then, I suppose?
How many times does it need to be said that Vikings =/= Barbarians? Unless they're also kittens.
Don't remember the link; thought I'd just make the reference, figuring obscurity might be worth a laugh.
I forgot too. Here it is.
http://www.rathergood.com/gaybar/
Or in their classic performance: http://users.wolfcrews.com/toys/vikings/
The rathergood link is blocked here. Stranger than we can imagine.
Here's one solution to the cell phone/iPod problem. Or something a tad less attention-grabbing. Or durable. Or maybe you could get Dr B to knit you one...
This thread has no redeeming social importance and isn't pornographic either, thus making it null and void according to the law of the land.
DDR doesn't get no love. It's such an addicting game.
Funny things: 200lb shivbunny dance-dancing to very girlie j-pop.
There's an ipod holder with a clip. I clip it onto my pants when walking, using the ellipitical, etc.
"Yeah, same with women's suits. Would it kill them to give me a jacket pocket I could put some stuff in, let alone respectably sized pants pockets?"
ARGHHHH
Modern suiting fabric weights just cannot support actual weight without fucking up the drape. DO NOT PUT SHIT IN JACKET POCKETS HEAVIER THAN A POCKET SQUARE!!!!
Or you can put the keys on a big diaper pin and pin them to your clothes.
My gyms have every locker key on a diaper pin and a clip, respectively. You all work out with wolves.