"silicone doll
crotch shots
eternal return
unfogged"
That is a delightful piece of poetry.
It's a lovely sunday afternoon! On days like this, who shan't feel gay!
Ogged's searches:
fl noodz
locker room etiquette
michael jordan underwear pictures
FL's searches:
shirtless athletes
naked rome screencaps
michael jordan underwear pictures
B-Wo's searches:
"fucking acne"
hug benefits
j
Unf's searches:
unfogged
Close, Smasher, but at the rate Labs sends me pictures of his cock, I never have to go searching.
I was kind of amused by the search for "Sophisticated Eroticism." Why would that lead to this site? (I keed, I keed...)
Just think, if it weren't for me that person looking for foreskin porn would never have found us.
And I think I can take credit for the calf fetishist. "j" is completely mysterious -- what was the searcher looking for, and how did they end up here?
LB - clearly, they wanted to know WWJD to this site...
"j" is completely mysterious -- what was the searcher looking for, and how did they end up here?
Something imaginary.
12, 14: It's part of an extended story arc that starts here. Lots of gay!
I arrived here searching for the thread for complaining about single-parenting your preschooler for a week and then as a bonus you pick up a violent stomach bug over the weekend? Never mind, I need to go vomit again.
I'm feeling kinda queasy too, but I promised PK that I'd take him miniature golfing. This is gonna be fun.
A little late in the day for teh Putt-Putt?
Yup. Poor kiddo just fell asleep on me. I've been procrastinating like a bad mama, in part b/c I'm feeling a li'l ooky, and now I'm going to have to deal with his wrath and accusations that I'm a big fat liar when he wakes up. :(
16 sounds pretty hellish. I hope the kid is at least fascinated by the barfing.
God, I hope the kid isn't fascinated by the barfing. The last thing you need while barfing is some little kid standing there asking fucking questions.
16: Oh, poor thing. Handling one kid solo isn't that hard when you're used to it, but a week on your own when your patterns are all set up for two parents sucks. Buck's business trips kill me (not so much anymore -- my kids are old enough to be pretty easy. But they used to suck). (And the stomach virus adds injury to insult.)
I hope the kid is at least fascinated by the barfing.
Let's hope it's a forest preschooler and not a temple preschooler.
Fortunately, more interested in the Wiggles (which sounds like a medical condition itself) than the technicolor yawns. Touch wood, offsprog remains uninfected. Keep. Washing. Hands.
21: What is that? Was it in you? Are you making a sister? Are those peas? Do you like peas? Did you eat peas with me? Did I eat peas? I don't like peas! Are you sick? Are you going to die?
20: Also, that the kid is not scientifically inclined, at least if someone's recent theory (which I am too incompetent to find and link; it was in the dog penis thread) that scientific types want to taste and touch everything is correct.
25: Exactly. God, that comment alone makes me want to yack.
I love this game!
football players naked having sex
unconscious staring at breasts
goose give birth
derrida two step
professors having sex with students
halloween muster (must be a misspelling)
office sex
naked people having sex
office sex stories (NUMBER ONE!)
office fucking
office sex offender
what to say to win back my ex (Answer: "Take down those pictures, you dumb fuck!")
fixing rusty hole (don't ask me, I don't know)
monty python uses of the word fuck shirley
Most Googlers who find my site seem to be interested in building a playhouse, a slate walkway or a garbage can enclosure, or learning to sing "The Night They Tore Old Dixie Down". I get lots of Moomin inquiry referrals too, which makes me happy.
This one just came in:
What is wrong with me? What must I write about?
What kind of trees does one hump or fantasize about humping, in the event that one has a fetish about tree-humping? I'm having trouble visualizing this.
Maybe it's some kind of glory hole thing, but with a Keebler elf.
I realize I may be am approaching the nadir of earnestness, but a number of bloggers seem to post these referrals. Isn't that ever-so-mildly unfriendly, in the grand scheme of things? I mean, people are searching, for whatever reason they get a blog post as a result, and (especially if it's not a useful result), re-posting their search query is only going to lead to more mis-directed searchers in the future.
Isn't there kind of a social contract (not universally shared) that what's on the page is somewhat representative of, well, what's on the page? When corporations salt their websites with fake words to pump themselves up in the search results, I'm annoyed, and -- more to the point -- discourged from my actual goal. eBay is a classic example. You used to be able to search for an item name and get actual hits reflecting that item.
I dunno, maybe I'm just feeling humorless tonight. But it bugs me.
35 -- Totally true. I had a feature early in the history of my blog where I would show recent referrals (including search-engine referrals) and this killed the usefulness of Google wrt my blog. So I disabled it. I am craving an html element that tells robots to disregard a particular block of text for indexing purposes but to my knowledge there is no such feature.
35 reminds me of a question I've been wondering about. Are those referrals the results of all the google searches that linked to Unfogged, or just to those results that the searcher then actually clicked on?
I'm pretty sure the latter -- I don't think there's any way for -gg-d to know when a Google search hits his site if the searcher does not follow the hit.
(Er well actually read "a site owner" for "-gg-d" in 38 -- -gg-d may himself have Ways Of Knowing which are not accessible to the rest of us.)
Witt, I for one feel no responsibility towards people who are doing searches on "my wife is a fucking bitch," "fucking children," or "how to fuck someone else's wife."
Referrals won't show up in your site's log file unless the search-result link to your site was actually clicked on.
meh, pwnd by 38 i guess. i'd have been quicker but i've lost about eight pounds today.
26: This is a kludge, but if you really really wanted an unindexible block of text on your site, you could post an image of the text, rather than the text itself IYSWIM.
37: Something I've wondered -- do referral logs show the last website you came from always, or only if you clicked a link? That is, if I'm at www.furrypron.com and then type "www.unfogged.com" in the address bar, does our referral log show "www.furrypron.com"?
37 -- only if you click a link. Well this behavior is obviously dependent on the browser; but the standard behavior for browsers is to send the URL of the referring site in the request header, or to send "" if there is no referrer. The image thing is way too fancy for my quite basic ASP abilities.
You should be quicker when you're eight pounds lighter.
I knew Ogged would have some awful hing to say about losing weight by throwing up.
My google referrer question is, if you do a google search, and then just do "copy link" from the google page and put it directly into your address bar, it doesn't show the google search does it? I actually do this sometimes because I am INSANEly paranoid.
Meh, pwned by 45 I guess. But it is kind of cool to think about writing a pathological browser that sent the wrong kind of information in the referral header. For some definitions of "cool", as long as "some" is taken to include the empty set as one of its possible values.
49: If 45 and 46 are reliable, which they probably are, then you should be covered.
49.2 is correct -- it does not show the google search. Relax.
it doesn't show the google search does it?
No. And if you're using Firefox, there's an extension called RefControl that lets you set, globally, or per site, whether you want the referrer blocked, spoofed, or normal.
Sometimes it pops up on your credit card statement, though.
I handwrite urls and then type them on a different computer.
53: Cool, I didn't think so. I'm lazy with the FF extensions, and I'm always worried they'll fuck up the browser and make it crashier, so I tend not to use 'em. But thanks.
The top 20 search strings so far this month at apostropher.com are:
788 knives
351 eddie van halen
190 tongue piercings
144 dylan hears a who
100 baby huey
79 huge rabbit
77 slither
67 death star
67 extreme body piercings
67 identical twins
60 my sweet lord
53 dylan hears a who mp3
52 apostropher
49 tarsier
41 barack obama antichrist
39 disadvantages of natural gas
34 baby monkey pictures
33 jones soda
31 jesus loves the little children
30 dumbass
60 -- No, no, not "Eddie van Halen" -- "My Sweet Lord".
Can I threadjack for a non-sex-picture-related topic?
This thread is useless without non-sex-pictures.
I like the idea of someone saying "Jesus loves the little children, dumbass"
63 -- any chance it will evolve into a bizarre story about Baton Rouge good-old-boy networks and corruption, and death threats left on your answering machine?
People google "apostropher" to get to your site? Why?
65 -- the speaker would probably be the mother in that video -gg-d linked the other day.
Knives
They're all coming in via Google Image to this picture. And tarsier,
Eddie Van Halen, and
Jones Soda.
66 - Actually, it's a-student-just-found-out-she-had-cancer related TJ, which is much less fun. I may keep this one to myself. I'm just torn because, well, it's an invasive ductal carcinoma, and as a survivor, my first instinct is "GET IT OUT BEFORE IT METASTASIZES!" I know mastectomies are more complicated than that, but, you know, THE FEAR. (And since I stopped going to my survivor's group, Ogged's the closest I have to a fellow traveler.)
Eek. I could have lived without seeing that knife photo.
I am actually haunted by a zit-popping video one of you posted a while back, and I didn't even watch it until the end. That thing gives me nightmares.
Woah. OK, I'll stop complaining about the stomach virus. Forget I ever mentioned it.
Crap, y'all are going to think I exist solely to trump. Swear I don't. Drinks on me, next big meet-up. Who's up for LA?
Jesus, how old is this student with breast cancer? That seriously sucks.
She's in her late 20's. It does suck, and she's asked me a number of questions...all of which I want to answer "surgery, surgery, surgery."
I don't know jack about breast cancer, but I thought surgery was the first treatment regardless -- that the main reason not to have surgery would be "It's too far along, you're going to die anyway, have some painkillers." But you're sounding as if that's way off.
I know mastectomies are more complicated than that
From what I recall, lumpectomy style procedures have the same success as masectomies. Also a worry here is the genetics. Her age indicates shittty genetic hand. She should get tested and find out.
Tell her to see more than one doctor, no matter what, and make sure the doctors are known and respected specialists in breast cancer. And if you get the sense that she's shying away from aggressive treatment because of concerns about her body (totally legit concerns, of course), it's ok to note (gently, if possible) that if she doesn't get it out, it'll kill her.
Who's up for LA?
I'd love for you to buy me a drink, SEK, but sorry, I think me travelling to LA would give B the wrong idea (again).
I can't believe I missed the railroad merger thread.
And yeah, that's shitty news, and best wishes that things turn out okay for her.
In fact, if she's coming to you for help, SEK, finding some excellent doctors for her would be great. Make a call to your med school and ask around. Which school are you at again?
Who's up for LA?
Me. Will you show up this time?
Well, of course, she can have a lumpectomy rather than a mastectomy. Depending on the state of her cancer, statistically the odds are as good. If it were me, personally? I honestly think it would be a tough decision between the two, even though I fucking hate myself for feeling that way, and want to say "fuck it, take the whole goddamn breast."
But that word "invasive"? I'm with you. GET IT OUT.
Wait, SEK is at med school? I thought he was a lit prof.
85: I'm at UCI, and I think we have a fairly strong medical center. I could do that.
86: B., thanks for your advice, here and elsewhere. And yes, I'd show up this time. No Mormons required. I have a car. (Also, at lunch the other day Drum thought maybe we should do some big SoCal bash. I'd love to do that, too...and yes, I'm not-so-slyly changing the topic.)
He is a lit prof, but I'm sure his institution has a med school
Re. mastectomy and aesthetics: you can do post-op reconstructive surgery. People do it all the damn time. The one down side is that it can interfere with further mammographies, but if you take the whole breast presumably there are no further mammographies?
Re. mastectomy and breast-feeding: this is a legitimate and real loss (not that aesthetics aren't, but it's funny that people often think of the aesthetics first). There are breast milk banks, which can compensate if the baby health issue is your primary concern. Losing the bonding and emotional (and physical) pleasure of breastfeeding would really fucking suck. But it would suck a hell of a lot more to lose mommy.
Ok, and UCLA has an excellent cancer center, so that's somewhere she could go for a second opinion. And gswift if totally right about getting genetic testing done. This is way early to have breast cancer.
Tell her to see more than one lit prof, no matter what.
Thanks all. Any more advice you want to give, I'll gladly take.
94: Surely one shouldn't discriminate on that basis, ogged.
I mean, your mom's a foreigner, but that doesn't mean she didn't suffer just as much from your cancer spoofscare as an Anglo mom would have.
She has a pretty strong support system, from what I know: husband, wide-extended family, so I think she'll be alright in that respect.
Ah, good. It's worth telling her that having someone go to each appointment with her (not something everyone thinks to do) is very helpful, both emotionally and in terms of remembering to ask the right things and the answers. I'm glad she's already married.
98: Yeah, who would marry someone if they had cancer?
Don't stop until you leave a funny one, M/lls.
Missing Sir Kraab, are you, M/tch?
You know, SEK already knows this, but if she's got whatever that goddamn gene is called, then not only is a double mastectomy indicated, but so is having her ovaries removed. Which is a much bigger deal, because it means either you have a baby, like, now, and then schedule the surgery or else you postpone or else you decide not to have kids. And worse, it means really fucking early menopause, which sucks.
All of which is better than dying, and all of which means that Ogged's right that it's a damn good thing she's already married. But wow.
but if she's got whatever that goddamn gene is called, then not only is a double mastectomy indicated
Not quite that simple. There's not just one mutation, and with modern treatments, "increased odds" does not necessarily mean "chop your tits off".
For the record, I only already know this because B's a saint. Don't sell yourself short.
Fair enough. Not an expert. Insert "may be" for "is."
104: I'm not a saint. I read an article recently, and I'm generalizing (erroneously) from it. Big whoop.
In my book, you've passed "may be" and are well on your way to "is."
NIH has a good page on breast cancer and some of the known genetic causes.
Alright, this is odd, but she just wrote and said she's 44 and isn't worried about kids/ovaries, and guesses she'll have to deal with early menopause.
She's 44. I would not have guessed that. This changes things, I guess.
She's 44.
?
There's no gentle way to say this, Scott. Are you an idiot?
Maybe his student is actually, e.g., Susan George or someone.
I know what you did last comma.
Since Ogged already said my other thought, I'll note that 44 is "better" in that hopefully it means she's not got some horrible genetic strike against her.
Missing Sir Kraab, are you, M/tch?
Hells yeah. Does it show?
112: Dude, it's not like SEK offered us an age estimate; all y'all just jumped to the conclusion that she was young.
Check out comment 78, pea in a pod Lovecraft.
In this week's Entourage, Ari cajoles his gay assistant to help woo a gay client. "Go grab your best dress and know that today your love of cock is a huge asset to
this company."
Has its moments, that show.
Don't stop until you leave an interesting one, ogged.
124: Crap, that was by me, and I don't know why it's in italics. Time to go to bed.
Gosh, I miss Sir Kraab.
I'm going to be on Jeopardy in July.
126: The proper preposition is "in".
I'm going to be on Jeopardy in July.
You can't say that presidentially! We have to root for you!
That's awesome, good luck. They never called after my audition, but I'm allowed (and planning) to try out again in June. Actually, whatever time, after but closest to June that they're doing auditions in my region again.
Ogged's right. At least give us a wee tiny hint?
Don't stop until you leave an interesting one, ogged.
What? That's a great quote.
There is more than one person on this thread trying to be a gameshow contestant? America is weird.
Well, I could do it one of two ways. I could use my handle, and then only let special people know by email request, or I could just let you know my real name but not my handle, and you'd never know whose scintillating comments are reflected on screen.
Or I could just forever compromise my pseudonimity, which seems like the easiest thing.
Reveal the date, and handle, but not name. Make people guess which contestant you are.
136 is exactly what I was going to suggest.
Are you a commenter living in (or near) Boston?
Remember when this was a Friday game?
If you get a daily double, wager the number of comments in dollars on the Innocence thread and we'll all know what that means.
Not Boston, no. Already played, have an airdate in July. (And I can't say how I did/how I'm doing! Even doubly pseudonymously!)
The 136-7 is fun but it would be pretty obvious. But maybe I'll do that.
But surely you can tell us whether you've made any significant purchases recently...
139 might be better advice as applied to a Final Jeopardy and only if your score was more than double the second place score plus 1434.
My bad. 44 would be very late 20s indeed.
112: She's one of those Californians. Work-out culture, you know. (Plus, I never look that closely. Bound by law and ethics not to.)
Fuck, we're supposed to work out? I moved back here because I thought we were supposed to be laid back and easygoing, not sweating our asses off down at the fucking gym.
No, you're supposed to TELL everyone you don't sweat your ass off at the gym. That doesn't mean you don't spend 3-4 hours a day there. (Especially if you have just had a baby -- in that case, you dropped all the weight "eating right" and "chasing your kids around.")
