I was surprised to see Becks as the author of this post.
It does have a certain Labsosity about it, doesn't it.
Not a single pic from this trip in the Flickr group. Come on.
2 - I can think of two authors here whose names I'd expect to see on this before Becks'. You are not one of them.
The last time I was there our various travels involved walking past the place on the Strip, whatever it's called, and some of the performers were out on the street trying to drum up interest. My immediate first thought was, Queens! All of them! I'm so glad I wasn't wrong. Sort of.
Penis antlers?
I know what these are, but my very brief search didn't turn up an image. It did, however, lead me to this picture.
11 -- I thought that guy was Japanese.
11 - Picture these or these or these, only in the shape of penises.
Those links are so fucking weird in how they smush together "penises" and "toys for little girls."
Thanks, Becks. You have enlarged my sense of life's possibilities. Especially the drinking straws. I would not have thought of the drinking straws.
Okay, the dick-through-the-head is officially disturbing.
There is something weird going on that I don't quite get with the male-stripper thing. (I haven't been to any male-strippers-for-women shows, ever, though in my dragged-to-gay-bars days, I saw a lot of male-strippers-for-gay-dudes shows.) Remember that cheesecakey video of the cowboy ice skaters? That was "for the women out there"? And a bunch of dudes doing the YMCA is for the women?
As far as I can tell, the difference between male stripping for gay dudes and male stripping for women is strippers for women come in large groups, whereas strippers for men tend to be solos, and strippers for women are more likely to be openly gay, coy, and playful, while strippers for men are trying to act straight and get right to the part where they swing their cocks around.
Overgeneralization corner, please take with a lot of salt:
I maintain that gay men and straight men are more similar in what they desire than gay men and women are.
Likewise, gay women and straight women are more similar than gay women and men are.
In other words, just because a gay person and a straight person are attracted to the same plumbing doesn't mean that they're attracted to the same thing.
the dick-through-the-head is officially disturbing
She gives great head.
Becks, you left out the most important part: where, exactly, can one go to see a Tribute to American Heroes switch to YMCA?
I need to know this for, um, research purposes.
Those links are so fucking weird in how they smush together "penises" and "toys for little girls."
Would it be terrible to say that concept is sort of hot?
I think the whole concept of strippers is more comical and entertaining than rawly sexual to women anyway, hence they are fine with camp. I mean, a lot of male viewers *really do* want to sleep with the stripper, while I think women view it as an entertaining lark.
Also, strippers for gay men are not chosen for their faces.
22 - Las Vegas: two shows a night, seven days a week.
This is the boyfriend. We were told to drop our friend's name "for a peek". (To answer your inevitable question, he didn't work our side of the room.)
A friend of mine did a couple years of stripping, mostly for bachelorette parties, and he really seemed to enjoy trying to get all the ladies turned on, didn't understand the unerotic campiness of it. He was very handsome, and had a whole routine, but wasn't very successful in the end.
If stories I have heard from an ex-g/friend about some hen-night type events are to be believed, it's not always about unerotic campness.
Would it be terrible to say that concept is sort of hot?
Kinda a little. Unless you're very careful about your context.
Oh, and I forgot - the most amusing part of the whole thing was a contest they ran during a "please go buy more overpriced drinks" break where they brought three girls on stage to see who could do the best fake orgasm. The second girl (a bride-to-be wearing a veil and with a penis straw) made the most disturbing noises I've ever heard. There were crickets afterwards, the audience was so stunned. The host recoiled with a look of horror. I don't know which is a more amusing thought -- that it was a "bag of sand" moment or if she actually does sound like that. If so, god help her future husband.
26: maybe he would have done better in the front?
25: the sound you hear is me weeping out of shame and inadequacy. [cue ogged: "and repressed desire!" me: "put your gag back in!"]
29: becks, could you, like, describe these noises?
Anyone tempted to click the first link in 25 might appreciate being warned that it launches a sound file that you probably don't want your boss to overhear.
made the most disturbing noises I've ever heard
Choop-choop-choop-choop-choop-choop-choop, NONNY!
I guess I always took the propositions in 20 to be self-evident. Are they controversial?
32 - So hard to describe. Maybe like a crow cawing crossed with a dog barking while being strangled underwater?
30: Eh, I think some people are too comfortable with their sexuality and imagine everyone else is too. The skill of a great stripper is being able to recognize that while you're basically a sex worker and do this stuff every day, your clients, especially if they're women, are not. Negotiating that boundary seems hard.
I remember when my friend got really happy at a party, he'd grab someone, throw him/her over his shoulder (very strong dude), and carry them off to a bed, where he'd kiss them and walk out smiling. It wasn't malevolent, and was surprisingly hot, but it freaked quite a few observers out. You have to follow a script of "what is hot" as a stripper-for-ladies, and I think surprise, though hot to an individual, isn't the kind of hot bachelorette parties are looking for.
35: I always feel extremely nervous making blanket statements about any group that I'm not a member of. (and whose respect I desire. So I'll generalize about Republicans but not gay people or fat people or minorities.) So, meek qualifiers.
I remember when my friend got really happy at a party, he'd grab someone, throw him/her over his shoulder (very strong dude), and carry them off to a bed, where he'd kiss them and walk out smiling. It wasn't malevolent, and was surprisingly hot, but it freaked quite a few observers out.
This would freak me out.
Me too. That's distinctly creepy, it seems to me.
But, I should not, no one would describe me as too comfortable with my sexuality, so mileage may vary.
Aw, he was sweet. We already had a making-out relationship when he did it the first time, so it was pretty charming, and I felt only the comic analog of fear.
well, sure, if it's always you, AWB, but you made it sound like some random party-goer was being physically coerced.
Maybe like a crow cawing crossed with a dog barking while being strangled underwater
sounds like you owe me a drunken voicemail.
43: He only did it to close friends, but other random partygoers observing were disturbed. This is what I mean--things that might be comfortable and sexy to two people are often uncomfortable for observers. When I see couples getting all erotic with each other in museums, I get annoyed. It would be hard to figure out how to do sexy things such that they are hot to observers, and then they wouldn't really be hot to you. This is why I suspect good porn actors aren't really getting that much out of it.
45 made about ten leaps of non-comparability and started a whole new argument.
It would be hard to figure out how to do sexy things such that they are hot to observers, and then they wouldn't really be hot to you. This is why I suspect good porn actors aren't really getting that much out of it.
Unless you get your kicks out of turning observers on. I think there's a "VALIDATE ME! VALIDATE ME!" personality (that I kinda recognize in myself) who can stray down that path.
And yet the ass shots have yet to appear on the front page.
I have a friend who made a very abrupt transition between dancer and bartender at the club where he worked but I now can't recall whether he was told to get down off the bar and serve drinks or whether he was told to drop his pants and get up on the bar to dance. Natch.
I suspect that we all have "VALIDATE ME!" instincts w/r/t sex, but with different objects. I require the validation of my partner being violently aroused to get my kicks, but I feel extremely squicky about trying to turn on strangers, who I imagine are just annoyed. (I guess there are people in the world who get mostly turned on by feeling personally aroused, and God bless 'em.)
And yet the ass shots have yet to appear on the front page.
Then everyone would stop paying attention to me.
I don't care if it's sexist, I'm going to say that this post proves that women are better than men.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
BAIT ALERT BAIT ALERT DO NOT TAKE THE BAIT
52: Care to flesh that out a little bit?
OH IDP YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE, YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T
My brother who used to know nude dancers said that narcissism was a big motive for many of them. They liked attention and they liked teasing men.
Mostly it was the money though. It was easier and far better-paid than waitressing or secretarial work, both of which can also be extremely unpleasant and somewhat degrading.
I think I'll just let the statement sit, out of respect for OG.
If you want to maximize your degradation and minimize your tips, you could strip while wearing the penis-arrow headband.
58: technically that would increase the number of tips by one.
True, true!
Somehow, the image that lodged in my head as horribly, horribly degrading was a Playboy cover from probably five years ago. It was the November issue, and this girl was dressed up like a turkey: naked on her back, on a silver platter. Her legs were bent so that her knees were together under her chin. Little sprigs of parsley, and those white turkey-footie hats on her hands, (the most humiliating detail). Photographed from above, so that she was staring straight into the camera.
That made me feel humiliated just to look at it. It's not like it was hardcore porn or anything, but it was so dehumanizing for the sake of a joke.
That if you wear a penis on your head, you've increased the number of tips by one.
Oh yeah, and she had an apple in her mouth. (Of course.)
Heebie, thanks *so much* for sharing the memory of that image with us all. Yuck.
I'm practically Queen Elizabeth with my uncanny knack for decorum over here.
Gawddamnit. Now I want a turkey sandwich. With gravy, for some reason, which is weird, as I don't like gravy that much, really.
I heard you like gravy just fine, Tim.
If you want wholesome, healthy, vitamin-rich decorum, google "cucumber sex" images.
Are you going to go claiming that images and stories like that need to be true?
I'm guessing it was Penthouse. That sounds much more like a Penthouse thing to do.
Not as far as I can see. Maybe Hustler. Maybe some other niche mag. Maybe Heebie's fevered imagination!
Not Hustler either.
Heebie-Geebie is banned!
No, if it were Hustler, there'd have been stuffing.
I'm sure Heebie was actually thinking of one of these, particularly Butt.
Yeah, I was actually thinking Hustler. Like the meat-grinder thing.
I love that Ogged read Heebie's description and thought, "hawt! Must find cover!"
How did a thread about gay strippers turn into something about symbolically stuffed she-turkeys? You people's breeder hegemony knows no limits.
It's because women are better than men at nitpicking, RMcMP.
It's just the awkward transition from sex thread to food thread, McManlyPants.
Eventually someone will use the phrase "eat me" and it'll all come full circle.
Surely we can all agree on deliciousness.
79 - I know. I'm disappointed, too. I'm just going to assume that everyone is boycotting this thread because they're so jealous of my awesome vacation.
Wasn't there a lot of gay stripping at UnfoggeDCon?
We're obsessively refreshing the goddamn Flickr group.
85 - Actually, there was one point during the act when there were a bunch of the guys on stage shirtless and I laughed to myself and thought "Just like UnfoggeDCon!"
89 - I'm having laptop problems. You really don't want to hear them. (Just ask poor 'Smasher.) Once those are sorted out, photos will be uploaded.
Who do I mail to get in on the photo group action again?
80 - That's because on the veldt, paleoguy was out spearing a mastodon while paleochick was tediously critiquing paleoguy's behavior. I read it in David Brooks.
It was real. I swear it was. Circa 2000-2001.
I'm sure it was real, but it wasn't Playboy, Penthouse, or Hustler.
Memory's a weird thing -- it may have been an interior page that your mind moved to the cover. Unless, I suppose, you saw this on a newsstand, in which case you wouldn't have seen the inside.
Heebie's expert testimony on pornography questions is always reliable. Don't doubt Doctor Heebie.
Lizardbreath's recent distasteful job duties have included defending Scooter Libby.
At the same time, Ogged's porn research skills are formidable. This puts the rest of us in a real quandary.
Emerson has been cowed ever since I found his family reunion pics.
Maybe it was a form of projection which came to her in a dream.
I'm sorry I sullied the names of those fine publications.
Also this picture is hilarious.
Except for one niece and a few years during one brother's youth, my family is totally G-rated.
Maybe it was a form of projection which came to her in a dream.
Ew!
60: Thinking of this, Heebie?
(NSFW)
http://www.villagevoice.com/people/0550,gates,70911,24.html/full
It's what I thought of when I read your comment, anyway--a Village Voice sex-column piece from a few weeks after Thanksgiving, 2005 about suburban "cannibalism" fetishists.
I saw an academic talk whose thesis was precisely the claim made in (20). The speaker (who was incredibly buff) framed the argument as a reply to both popular stereotypes of gays as feminized men and to sloppy academic work that perpetuated the same images.
