Dude, what are you doing?

Was this one of eHarmony's scientifically determined matches?

It's like one of those "how to build your online profile" articles:

In the interests section, you may have written, "I have an obsession with serial killers, mass murderers, dictators, cults, psychopaths, and psychotics." That might sound a little intense for some people! Changing a few words can make your hobbies seem a lot more engaging. For example, you could change the above to, "I enjoy reading about the odd corners of history, and love to hike."

I think this guy has a very small range of good potential partners, but once he finds the exact right girl they will be very happy together. Especially since they each thought there was no one else in the world like them.

Only problem is, it's likely all of his good potential partners live in LA or NYC. He should really put an ad in Fangoria or something.

Funny, he didn't mention snuff films.

He could always show up at Manson's next parole hearing and start macking on any age-appropriate women he finds there.

once he finds the exact right girl they will be very happy together.

I used to work with someone who had a bulletin board full of Andrew Cunanan photographs. At the time I thought she (age 17) would grow out of it.

Nothing says "Tod Browning" like "Takashi Miike".

Maybe this is emulating those London lit review personals that are as vile as possible.

This guy is 30?

From one perspective, a born bookseller, specializing in true crime, psychotic style. There's a niche. Zero in on that bookshelf, baby.

Don't ask me why I think of this, but I do. I just do.

"No, I'm not Charlie Manson. Not quite. But I'm available, and he's not."

They'll be very happy together . . . until he kills her and stuffs her body into the chimney, or else they join in a suicide pact. Whichever comes first.

Naw, I bet a girlfriend would be very stabilizing for him. The serial killer potential all comes out if he spends another ten years lonely and isolated.

You know, Fangoria really does have a personals section. That would be worth checking out.

I vote for the suicide pact. He looks too emo to be a chimney-stuffer.

I bet a girlfriend would be very stabilizing for him.

Ladies, line up to volunteer to prevent me from becoming a serial killer! Chances of my actually killing *you* are fairly low. Ish.

I can't believe you found my profile. How embarassing!

That guy is hilarious. You, the squares, are being freaked as we speak.

Never has the "hide more" option been as appealing.

What's wrong with that guy? We've all had late-night wikipedia binges reading about Erszebet Bathory and H. H. Holmes, and that German guy who ate someone's penis, haven't we? What about those mock-horror true-story graphic novels? And who doesn't like giallo? I'm being serious. I think his interests are perfectly bourgeois.

I think his interests are perfectly bourgeois.

Interests: Horror movies, What Have They Done To Solange?, the Cleveland Torso Killer, giant spiders.

I love that he feels he must point out "Political correctness and uptight people bother me."

Trust me buddy, your pictures say that loud and clear.

I am actually surprised there is someone that interesting in Tulsa.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

!!! If a joke, not really funny. If not a joke, pretty bigoted.

23: Unless he lives in Tulsa, or nearby.

Actually it's funny regardless.

10 gets it right. The guy looks 15.

At least he's not offering his special lady champagne suppers and walks on the beach. That would be creepy.

20: How did I not hear of these remarkable sculptures before? I feel like such a rube, spiderless, in flyoverland. Do you think there are tiny replicas offered for sale?

Why didn't you link this picture, ogged? It captures the spirit of the thing much better.

Or this one!

Jesus. Where are you finding these?

He's in the bathtub so he won't make too much of a mess for whoever has to clean it up! What a considerate, fastidious young man.

I'm totally moving to Tulsa. I want to cuddle with him and his gun...in my mouth.

Same place I thought you found his profile. Googled an improbable phrase from what you posted...

Those pictures are seriously screwed up but thanks they are hilarious in a hideous way.

What the hell is on his head?

I see where you are; no, I saw his Salon Personals ad, which uses the same text, but not all the same pictures.

So is this guy a decent but screwed up kid or an actual danger to someone down the line? He's certainly got a little crazy in those eyes, and you can't tell me you'd be surprised if you saw him on the news one night.

No way to know, really. Everybody I've ever known like that has been a weirdo but basically harmless, but then again people who snap do generally seem rather like that kid. He seems pretty social for an antisocial loner, though, if he's posting a personal ad.

He definitely needs a lot of work. But I'm positive I can change him!

He's got goth chicks telling him he's sexy. And those pictures were taken by a photographer, and they are actually a bit arty. I vote "not a danger".

41: Probably right, but someone considering responding might prudently wonder if the guy is trolling for victims.

I just realized what these photographs reminded me of: Larry Clark's book "Tulsa." No, this guy is no menace.

Does he mean this to be an actual ad, or maybe more along the likes of "Here's my personality! I'm making my mark on this tinytiny little corner of the internet" ?

I wonder if people use matchmaking ads when they just can't face the relatively interactive means of announcing themselves to the world of MySpace or Facebook or whatever.com, but still want to say, "Here! I'm here!"

He's also on myspace, and seems to have some friends.

He's also on myspace, and seems to have some friends.

So was this guy.

This reminds me of the "worst ever dating videos" sketches from Smack The Pony.

I think this guy has a very small range of good potential partners, but once he finds the exact right girl they will be very happy together. Especially since they each thought there was no one else in the world like them.

I dunno, I know some people sort of like him (as far as one can tell from this ad) and most of them aren't too bad. There's a lot of posturing involved in their interests--and I don't mean that, entirely, in a bad way. There's something compelling about people who are so driven to stylize themselves, and I suppose that if I lived in Tulsa and were not-so-gender-normative I might be rather into annoying Aunt Authority.

Contra someone way way back there who remarked that this fellow's interests were totally bourgeois, my experience is that the fellows who are really into the true crime and the skulls and the "perverse" fascination with violence are often from a working class/lower middle class background. It has, in my opinion, something to do with gender and the performance of masculinity and class norms and a sort of non-middle-class understanding of what's avante-garde. (There's my thesis! Hooray!)

Also, I think the position in our culture of violence/slasher films/horrible pictures of people getting hurt (all of which I hate!) is really changing in response both to the widespread availability of pornography and the tensions within media over how to show people and bodies ("perfect", plastic surgeried/airbrushed vs. "real"/hidden camera/YouTube). So in a sense, I think ol' bleached and scary has his finger on the pulse, you know?

Granted, he's not my personal type, but I'm not entirely sure that he'd be a bad pick if one shared enough interests.

Zee OMG, as the kids say. This guy is half my friends from college including myself. He's harmless. He lives in the middle of nowhere and feels frustrated and at 30 he's still acting out against what he perceives as complete, zombified conformity all around him. I bet he talks about nothing but his own emotions when he gets really drunk. If I woke up in 1997 and in Tulsa I would totally try to lay him. Good grief, I still have days when I try to think of myself as being like this guy. Having obscure tastes in horror movies (Miike is a great filmmaker even if I'll never, ever watch Audition a second time) doesn't make him a psycho. I wouldn't at all be surprised if he's just a person living through violent times in a violent world and one of his coping mechanisms is to try to abstract that out and separate it from himself by obsessing over films. If he's drinking all the time he's already trying to shut out some part of the world or otherwise numb himself to it. Relegating all the darkness of human experience to the DVD player is probably just another expression of that. He's posting to personals sites and going to school at 30. He's reaching out in some way.

OK, yeah, so he could be a psycho-in-waiting. I don't know. One paragraph isn't a lot to go on. Still, I look at that and I can count off a half-dozen good friends of mine, past and present, who in some way fit the bill and were just fine unless you count "confused/conflicted about their future or the future of the world in general and at a loss for how to express that" as fucked up.

I bet he is a blast at estate sales.

Yeah. Pants--um--nails him. Guy is a walking Daniel Clowes cartoon. Really. One of the strips in--Twentieth Century Eightball, I think--is about someone very like this. Which isn't to say that he might not be lots of fun, too. But there's nothing especially weird or outre about his stated interests.