Sometimes you're really, really funny. Who are the two in the first picture?
I'd like to know what he searched for to find these.
Or if they're, like, from a private stash or something.
What's wrong with the first guy? He's no Adrien Brody, but he's nowhere near the level of Guy 2.
Stephanie Seymour and her husband, Denise Richards and Ritchie Sambora. Both found at WWTDD. And now I have to go work out, lest the terrible fate of these men befall me.
The top one is Stephanie Seymour with some dude. The second is Denise Richards with Richie Sambora.
The first time I looked at the first photo, my eyes read the husband out of the photo. I would have sworn, initially, that she was alone in the photo. So weird.
Seymour does not look at all happy in that photo.
13 I was gonna say she looks hungry. Eat a sandwich, girl. Men like a woman with meat on her bones.
"And now I have to go work out, lest the terrible fate of these men befall me."
Ogged, I have terrible news for you. Someday -- if you are lucky -- you will get old. It doesn't matter how much you work out. That jet black hair will go white. You skin will wrinkle. Sags will develop in places you never thought sagging was possible.
In other words, that fate WILL befall you. If you are lucky.
Geez. Second-most depressing unfogged comment ever.
Have fun at the gym, ogged! Remember, it's all for nothing!
see now, somebody like me sees these pics, with the title 'what women want' and focuses on a completely different aspect of said pics...
Damn. Richie's sunburn looks mighty painful. I hope he got some aloe vera going later that evening.
Huh. One of the most interesting things in the world is getting older and teaching yourself how to enjoy it. I'm vaguely reminded of something in yoga: observe yourself, breathe into it, here you are as you are, don't judge.
Sheeit. I see worse than that pretty much every time I go to the beach.
21:
here you are as you are
Sounds a little Buckaroo Bonzai to me.
23: and what's bad about that, exactly?
observe yourself, breathe into it, here you are as you are, don't judge
Nothing about this blog should ever make you think this.
"Second-most depressing unfogged comment ever."
Well, OK, I left out all the good parts about getting older.
If you do it right, you're a lot more content. You attain the things you really need but didn't know you needed; and you lose interest in all the unattainable things you thought you needed, but don't.
In short, you get a fuck of a lot smarter and happier.
I used to look like a Greek god when I was 18. Now I'm a pudgy old dude with gray sideburns and a double chin. But would I trade what I have now to go back to being 18? HELL NO!
lest the terrible fate of these men befall me
Lest you frolic at the beach with attractive and accomplished women?
But would I trade what I have now to go back to being 18? HELL NO!
Transplanting my 41-year-old brain into my 18-year-old body, OTOH....
They want boobs, obviously, and those guys have got 'em.
At first glance, I thought the guy in the top picture was Bill Richardson.
I returned from the beach tonight (just me - the rest of the family is there until Friday night) to find my house completely infested with fleas. Now, instead of relaxing on the couch and watching TV, I'm killing time at work while two anti-flea foggers poison the little fuckers.
Anything happen while I was gone?
I have a hard time believing that there's anything in an anti-flea fogger that you haven't already built up an immunity to.
Oh, well, B bought a muumuu. That's about it.
I expected a nice quiet evening of watching the past week's TiVo'd fighting. Instead, I've got an hour and a half before I can go back and open the windows, then another hour before I can stay. I probably need to stop on the way home and get flea dip to dunk the cats tonight, which means I'll end up bloody as well. I've probably got two twelve hour workdays coming on Thursday and Friday, separated by washing every damn thing in the house to de-poisonify it before the children arrive Friday night.
This is the worst end to a vacation I've ever had.
Maybe it's time to reconsider whether the children are really worth the effort?
That sucks, dude, but it could be worse, you could have manboobs and be frolicking on the beach with Denise Richards.
38: All I'm really missing from that scenario is Denise Richards.
36: is there anyone here you'd like to fight for your entertainment?
37: I don't even like these cats. That's the real kicker.
41: That's so awesome. Maybe they can mysteriously move to a farm while the kids are away.
I don't even like these cats. That's the real kicker.
Do the wife and kids know they're still alive?
I was going to put them in the shed while I fogged the house, but (wouldn't you know it) the key to the shed is on Roberta's keychain, 350 miles away. So they're each in a cardboard carrier in the back yard, probably just now reaching the fully traumatized stage. Which I will then compound by dunking them.
Stupid cats.
It's like some bizarre version of Home Alone. Watch out for the swinging paint can as you walk through the front door.
If you had someplace to put 'em you could leave them outside and then get some Advantage in the morning.
Save you some bleeding, in any case.
Does Advantage kill the live adults in the hair or just scuttle the reproductive cycle?
47: I put some pyrethrin-based liquid on their necks this evening, which I bought at the same time that I bought the foggers. Does that stuff actually work?
I wonder what kind of dose would be lethal to, say, cats.
Many many years ago, my dad's friend/sorta surrogate grandfather took his then brother-in-law home at the end of a hunting trip, whereupon the b-i-l discovered that his wife's hateful cat had shit in the bed, whereupon he booted the cat out of the house and put a large hole in it with a .30-06. And then tried to figure out how to explain things to his wife. DF/SSG let him suffer a while, then fixed the problem by pitching the cat carcass in the road and running over it a few times with his pickup. B-i-l was suitably sympathetic when his wife arrived home.
Things were different back when, the statute of limitations has long run, and the protagonist of the story has been dead for several years.
apostropher-- that stuff works, but it's dangerous for the cats. Yeah, I know you don't like them: but still. Here's an easier way, that involves neither pyrethrin nor the dangers of a flea bath. Purchase "capstar" pills. They are really small pills, and on the scale of things, incredibly easy to get into a kitty. And they are safer than any other product to deal with fleas and cats. You'll probably end up wanting to do this, even if you have flea bombed, because the persistance of fleas is incredible. You can, however, prevent it from ever getting out of control again by regular use of Capstar. Give the kitties one every day for the first week, one every other day for a second week, one every third day for a third week. Then, for the rest of the summer, give them one once a week.
sorry for the interruption folks--this has been a PSA. :)
I'll never figure out why, in any given thread about cats, discussion always turns to the various ways to kill them.
A few people always justify it by claiming it's all in good humor, and hey lighten up buddy, but I never can find anything funny about it whatsoever...
55: it is? I mean, I know it's an internal thing, and thus a little more risky than the flea bath, but is it really that dangerous?
I'll never figure out why, in any given thread about cats, discussion always turns to the various ways to kill them.
There's probably a deep truth here about why people love cats.
55: yeah, it really is. Some cats can take it, of course, but bad side effects ranging from the innocuous loss of massive amounts of hair, to acute renal failure and death are surprisingly common. And the thing is, Capstar is much more effective for long term management, easy to use, and completely safe. Even for short term management, it is way more effective than a flea bath--or multiple flea baths (plus, less risk of getting arm ripped off by angry cat in pilling her than in trying to give her a bath). It is so safe in fact, that it's the only thing that educated vets will use on cats under 12 weeks, or geriatric cats. One can't get it at the grocery store (like the dangerous anti-flea products), but any reputable vet will have it in stock, and you can get it over the web without a prescription from a vet.
You can also use diactamous earth, at least in the house. It'll work great in the yard, too, but if it rains it'll stop working. Basically nontoxic, but put it in cracks so the babies don't, like, eat it or something.
Tweety, for the last hour, I've been listening to that mix you posted a few months ago. It's good; I like it; but it's not helping.
Classic trade of status / celebrity for beauty, right in front of our eyes. Ogged is going ev psych on us.
I often listen to Tweety's mix at work. Asked by co-workers what it is, I sheepishly reply, "It's a mix. From this teacher. Um, From China, sort of."
59: is there a reason why something like Frontline or Revolution (I take it these are brand names, but still) are contra-indicated here?
If I'm not mistaken, those are different brands of the same product being discussed.
So, having set off a fogger upstairs and another downstairs last night, there were still fleas kicking around this morning. How many poisonous blasts does this sort of thing generally require?
We used to use a fogger for each room. That did it. I emailed the vet/kid for the current state of the art but haven't gotten a reply yet.
APO!
Glad your vacation went well, sorry the ending was teh suxxor. Quiet week 'round these parts, right LB? :)
PS -- Don't kill the cats. Karma's a boomerang.
It's diatomaceous earth. And breathing too much of the dust is what can be a problem. Eating it is actually a treatment for intestinal worms.
But this is a long-term, non-toxic prevention strategy; I forgot to touch on that. It won't help you out right now. What you need is more chemical warfare. But DE certainly kills pests in a sadistically satisfying manner.
diatomaceous earth
I swear this sounds like something out of a Harry Potter novel.
61: I certainly don't aim to be helpful.
sorry the ending was teh suxxor.
Bad endings to good vacations? Worth a new thread? Mine was coming home after a couple of weeks in NY to find a freezer loaded with meat had lost its cool shortly after we left the place. 'Twas in the Alabama summer and my gag reflex worked some serious overtime during the clean-up. CSI as an alternate career doesn't appeal.
So women want rich guys and rock stars?
Empirically speaking, the answer is "duh!"
My honey lives with two cats, both of which belong to his roommate who is out of town for two weeks right now. The cats, despite being fed, watered, let outside, and even petted, are freaking out, as usual. One of them vomited all over one of my honey's carpets. Talk about homicidal rage.
You can't really blame cats for vomiting. They do that.
If vomiting cats drives your honey into homicidal rage, might I suggest that pet ownership is probably not right for him.
man, I was looking at pictures of myself from like ten years ago in my new organizing, and I had crazy abs. stupid children. I want girdles to come back in style, but they're too hot for here anyway.
No, no, it blew over very quickly. It's just that these aren't his cats, the roommate (brother) takes it for granted that my honey will look after them, and the cats seem to vomit ONLY on the handknotted Persian carpets. Isn't there any way to keep the cats from vomiting?
Isn't there any way to keep the cats from vomiting?
Just stop feeding them. One of my cats vomits about every fifth time she eats.
81 is just about right, except that I would consider paying cash money for the opportunity to trade for a cat that vomits only every fifth time she eats. (Luckily for us, one of the other cats likes to, er, help with the clean up.)
Cat ownership is looking less joyful all the time.
Sorry alameida, but you don't get to blame the kids.
Oh, please. I, myself, have six-pack abs, concealed for security behind a small keg.
Six-pack abs are so precious, they must be attended at all times by a phalanx of adipose tissue.
Cats' systems are built to vomit, so that they can hork back up the bones of birds and rodents. Why Maggie keeps spewing up Purina, though, remains a mystery to me. So far as I know, her sister Molly has never thrown up.
I choose to interpret "six-pack abs" as the abs you get from doing 12 oz curls.
Puking cats = hairballs. Give the poor damn creature some petromalt, available at your local pet store.
Isn't there any way to keep the cats from vomiting?
A trash bag and an exhaust pipe, aka "aromatherapy."
This is all further evidence that cats are terrible animals.
You know, I went for many years without realizing it was perfectly socially acceptable to wish for the deaths of cats and bicyclists. It still seems weird to me.
Also, gswift, is it okay if I kill, cook and eat your dog?
Puking cats = hairballs.
Not mine. It's always a couple of minutes after she starts eating, and it's pure, undigested cat food. I think she just eats too fast and it backs up on her. Also, it's accompanied by a totally different sound than her trying to hack up a furball.
Yes. Puking food immediately after eating is, in fact, a symptom of hairballs. Brush her and give her some damn petromalt.
Yeah, sometimes with wet food they'll eat too fast and then throw up. Dry food they hate, and thus eat slower. Works out good!
The sadness of the deaths of both of our cats last month was mitigated considerably by months of (non-hairball-related-) puking and other digestive problems as their health declined. Thinking about getting a cat? Try to imagine being awakened by a cat with diarrhea letting loose noisily on the floor at 4 in the morning. Does the trick, doesn't it?
After 14 years, petlessness is a pleasant state.
Is there any reason to ever give cats wet food?
Hey, I didn't say I wanted you dead because you were a bicyclist, I said I wanted you dead because you were a bicyclist who was going to put me in the position of accidentally killing you. Entirely different.
And I had no idea you were Tongan. (Actually, come to think of it, I don't know if they really do eat dog in Tonga, or if that's a Samoan slur.)
Our cats only get dry food. The times we tried to give them wet food, they wouldn't touch the stuff.
Also, anybody want two grown, friendly cats? I'm lusting after JMcQ's petlessness right now.
Also, gswift, is it okay if I kill, cook and eat your dog?
What are you, Korean?
I'm actually a cat person, but I knew I'd get a rise out of someone with that.
99: a shameless hunt for undeserved affection?
Heebie wrote a post a while back about giving her cats rabbit and peas dry food, since they despise it and are less likely to wolf it down and throw it up, but I think she said it requires a prescription. HG, are you still around?
Remember: if the size difference was reversed, your cat would kill you and entertain itself with your corpse.
giving her cats rabbit
If there's any rabbit in my kitchen, I'm going to be the one eating it. Piss off, cats.
99: Yes. Dry food contains a lot more ash, which is bad for their kidneys, and a lot less meat protein, which just seems wrong given that cats are carnivores. Rabbit and pea food shouldn't be prescription-only, but generally the non-poultry based cat foods can be damn hard to find. And finally, if you're gonna change a cat's food, you have to do it over time by mixing it with the old food (if you're cat tends to be picky) because apparently the little beasts can really fuck up their own livers by fasting for too long.
94 gets it right. I've seen hardly any hairballs, but my cats used to throw up all the time.
Apo, that blows. You can, actually, get fleas without cats, but the cats don't help. Sandy soil surrounding the house can sometimes be a factor.
I don't know if this is the pyrethrin stuff everyone else says is dangerous, but it's useful. Flea Traps also work surprisingly well, as long as you can have them in an otherwise dark room at night. And if you do have the sandy soil, and your cats are outdoor cats, you might want to look into the nematodes.
I also see plenty of examples (no one famous, just around) of super hot guys with meh girlfriends, but somehow that would not be as funny. Why is that?
110.3: because it doesn't tie into the previous thread?
Hey Apo, sorry about the fleas. They are despicably hard to get rid of, the little bastards. I had better luck with spray-on treatments for carpets & upholstery than with foggers. Which makes sense, when you think of it, since the fleas aren't up in the air--they're in the carpet, mainly, and any other fabric they can find. The higher spaces, cabinets, etc. take up some of poison distributed in the fogger, making it less effective overall. With a spray-on, you can target the lower areas where they're more likely to congregate.
Make sure whatever you use works on not just adult fleas, but also the eggs/larvae. Look for IGR (Insect Growth Regulator) or something indicating it works on the young 'uns too. Unfortunately, when they're in the pupae stage, there's really nothing that can kill them; their cocoons are water-tight and won't be affected by pesticides. So you can expect a few late-comers to your party, in any case. The IGR usually hangs around residually for a while, so that should catch the fleas emerging from the pupae. (IGR doesn't kill them, btw, it just stops any eggs they lay from progressing into biting adults.)
Be sure to vacuum well after you've sprayed, and remove the bag/empty the vacuum into the outdoor trash bin; you don't want any of them reviving and crawling back out again. And you'll obviously have to wash all the bedclothes and things that have been contaminated by the foggers. And don't forget the cat's beds and frequently-used areas; those will need extra attention, probably, to really get rid of the buggers.
Obviously, I've had this problem myself. You have my sympathies.
Hey, is this the best thread to ask if I'm the only one who went to see Order of the Phoenix last night?
113: I'm seeing it tonight. Any good?
I'm here. 105 states the long and short of it pretty accurately.
108 gets it right. Dry cat food has lots of binders, mostly carbohydrates, to hold it together. A carb-heavy diet is even worse for a cat than it is for a person--they're not meant for it. Our vet told us last year, when we were switching one of our cats to a wet food only diet, that some research indicated that the growth in diabetes among housecats was linked to consumption of dry food. That said, he acknowledged that he still gave it to his cats.
My cat refuses to take water from a bowl. Refuses. He had a string of urinary problems, and we switched him to wet, prescription food (to avoid crystal formation), and he's been good since.
The vet thought that plain wet food would probably be okay, but would be best to keep his pH from getting out of hand.
Moral of the story: apparently, some cats are completely retarded and need to be tricked into hydration.
Why do threads that start dealing with the necessary task of eliminating cats and avoiding blame always end up as threads about how to save them? I'm sure most of the comments are jokes, but still.
114: No. But it's still the best of the movies so far. I'm writing a longer and whinier review at my blog today.
116: Carbohydrates like... wheat gluten! AIIIIII!
I feed my cats nothing but freshly killed sparrows.
The rabbit and peas is prescription dry food. It's just those two ingredients, so that you can give it to cats with food allergies. Which one cat does have - everything seems to give him the shits, besides this stuff.
They make wet rabbit&peas, too. But I hate giving my cats wet cat food because it turns them into writhing crack zombies who are obsessed with ushering me towards the kitchen 24-7.
121.2 exactly! I've given my cats wet food maybe a dozen times, but they never forget.
I thought gluten was protein. (Of course, I also thought dry food was fine for cats. Look, I've never been in charge of the cat -- we had one growing up but my parents bought the food. The only time I had my own cat she lived on canned mackerel and fresh-caught-rat, until she stopped eating the mackerel and stuck with just rat. She still hung around for skatchies under the chin, but didn't eat anything she didn't find for herself.)
122:
And it takes forever for the behavior to extinguish.
I quit the wet food, and moved apartments and they transported the crazed behavior, howling at me in the kitchen of the new apartment.
123: apparently so. Also, it's what Tofurkey is made of.
Mmm, festive holiday plastic byproducts!
She still hung around for skatchies under the chin, but didn't eat anything she didn't find for herself
The perfect pet.
Wait a minute. Tofurkey is not only not made of turkey, it's not even made of tofu? I call shenanigans.
That's just way, way out of line.
I guess I have to make a vet appointment and get that rabbit/pea scrip. Sigh.
121, 122: Damn cats! Letting you know how thrilled they are to be eating something because they like it, rather than merely because they'd starve without it!
128 - Actually it's easier than that. The few vets that I've been to have either stocked it or were willing to order it for me, and they didn't sweat the prescription part since they were a vet clinic. So the only inconvenience is that you can't buy it from the grocery store (or PetSmart without a prescription).
126: The 8 kittens in a year were a drawback. (Samoa, no way to get her spayed.) I found them homes, but god knows how they were cared for.
(Note: I found her in Samoa, and therefore do not consider myself responsible for increasing the Samoan feral cat population. But I feel enough inchoate guilt on this front to get touchy about it if someone brings it up.)
129: I know! Ungrateful bastards.
Have you guys seen this tattooing thing that some Humane Societies have started doing after they spay a cat or dog? So that if the female gets picked up again in the future, they can tell she already had the surgery without opening her up again?
It pleased me that there was a solution for a problem I'd never thought of. Like putting the razor edge on the far edge of the box of the Saran Wrap dispensor.
Is the stuff you can buy online not the true Rabbit&Peas cat food?
That's the same stuff. I did buy it online once, I forgot about that. There was some crap about needing your doctor to first e-mail them with a prescription number and verify some crap. I think I bullied my way through the system and placed my order without doing the prescription stuff. And it came. And the cats ate it.
slightly on-topic:
anyone else ever think that stephanie seymour resembles martin landau of the old mission impossible?
just the face, of course.
The longer this thread goes, the less I want my cats.
No, but Luci Baines Johnson has an unfortunate resemblance to her father.
Have we discussed Ladybird dying here? I'm sentimental towards her.
hey, c'mon, lbj looked like a greek god.
i forget which.
120: Whatever, it's still not really all that good for them. Though that's not why we switched one cat off the dry stuff (the other one still eats it.) We did that because the dry food gave her horrible, incredibly foul smelling diarrhea. Which was kind of a drag for everyone.
I'm glad she had such a long, and from everything I understood happy, life after he died. I'm basing this on Robert Caro, but he sounds like about the worst husband in the world.
Yeah, LBJ was a total shit to Ladybird.
"believe me, my dear, I've had a much better time as Sir Gilbert's widow than I ever had as Mr. Gilbert's wife."
referring to gilbert of _ and sullivan.
from the autobiography of jessie bond, the original iolanthe (+ many other roles).
maybe fitting that a post on 'what women want' has finally come around to 'a dead husband'.
writhing crack zombies who are obsessed with ushering me towards the kitchen 24-7.
Well put, madam.
146:
i was thinking of geoff, the god of biscuits, but maybe you're right.
The vet gave us a lecture about dry food at our cats' last check-up and we've since switched them to mostly wet. We give them a mixture because the dry is far, far better for their teeth but the wet is far, far better for them as food. They get more wet than dry, so, y'know. Most dry food is basically equivalent to feeding them Meat Twinkies.
On the topic of cats not wanting water out of a bowl, some cats just insist on flowing water. We tried a little fountain thing we inherited from a friend and the cats were like, uh, no. They are quite happy with water out of the bowl. However, Rah's mother used to have to salt his childhood cat's food to get it to drink more water. Screwy.
133: Yeah, my friend took a stray in for spaying, and the vet called in a panic: "We can't find her uterus!" She'd already had it done, it turned out, but I think the vet surgeon didn't understand why he wouldn't know his cat was already spayed.
Now every time she's out of line, it's "Knock it off, or I'll give you another hysterectomy."
Yeah, not dice with the fountain, either. But it certainly made a nice splashy sound.
I've heard about the salting of food, but boy does it seem odd.
On the topic of cats not wanting water out of a bowl
Is this still live? I'm not sure who first asked.
I have cats like this, and believe it or not, what's worked is providing a very large ceramic bowl/dish of water that -- this will sound very odd -- grows greenish, er, bracken over time.
In other words, we don't dump it and refresh it constantly, but just refill it. It has green mildewish stuff in it (!) akin to what you see in an aquarium. I'm blanking on the name for it. The cats like this. They will not drink fresh tapwater. Who knows.
129: Cats are rarely show gratitude to any degree, let alone that degree, so when they do the weirdness is hard to enjoy. And then, you get to feeling obligated to always be that prompt, or else maybe they, um, will be less friendly less time.
The whole point of having cats is that they're the pets that will occasionally get in your lap and purr, or run around the room like an idiot and put on a show, but most of the time will leave you alone and expect to be left alone. If I wanted something that loudly begged for food and made a big deal out of dinner from a can, I'd get a dog.
112: From the vet/kid: "Capstar will kill fleas on the cat but does not prevent fleas. Advantage or Frontline would be my recommendations for fleas."
Our cat pretty much refuses to eat anything but dry food. She's turned up her nose at wet cat food, leftover steak, fresh fish, and I've forgotten what all else. She does seem to have a taste for lizard, but she handles that on her own.
On the "death to cats!" humor, the thing is that cats are kind of like brown people: they can be very nice from time to time, even lovable in their warped little way, but they have to understand that they'll be killed if they get out of line.
Biohazard, Heebie, Bhpd and all:
my goodnees, go do some work, and look at all the cat talk I miss!
1) yes, capstar doesn't contain an IGR (the thing that prevents the fleas that bite from laying eggs). On the other hand, when used regularly it's just as effective in the long term (I just checked, and google searches even produce the relevant studies, though it's easier to get access to more of them if you have access to a library) And sad to say, with the level of flea infestation that you have, this is going to be a long term battle no matter what chemicals you employ (unless you just move!) In the end, the point is to win this war, and keep the cats alive in the meantime. The trick with the Capstar is just to give it to the cats regularly, for long enough.
2) I hate to say this apostopher, but if the fleas are still active this morning, you have a serious enough problem that it's time to call a professional and leave the house for the weekend while they take care of as much of it as is possible. I know it's a lot of money, but if you can pull the $ together, just do it. After that, Bphd's suggestion for diat. earth will be helpful-- it won't kill the eggs, or the pupae, but it will help. For the eggs and pupae the best thing you can do is vacuum--at least twice a day. And every time you vacuum, after you finish, take the vacuum outside, empty the bag, and leave the vacuum itself outside too.
158: maybe the fleas are coming from you?
apostropher- I'm really sorry. Fleas are fucking hell. Treat the cats, but try and focus most of your attention right now on the environment. At this level of infestation, most of your problem is, and will be for some time, coming from the eggs and pupae brewing in the floor. Once you get a professional in to kill all the adult fleas, focus on the eggs-pupae problem. [Some un-professional professionals will tell you that what they use will kill the eggs/pupae. Believe them not.]
One useful thing I forgot to say about the vacuuming: Part of the reason for vacuuming the entire surface area twice a day is that while on the one hand, a decent vacuum will suck up a bunch of eggs, and some pupae, the flea pupae twine themselves around carpet threads in such a fashion as makes it really difficult to vacuum them up. BUT vacuuming also commonly stimulates some of the pupae to 'emerge' to flea-state, and await flesh to pass by. So, if you vacuum twice a day, you can get both a bunch of eggs & a few pupae, but also (the second time you vacuum) the new pupae that 'hatched' as a result of the first time you vacuumed--before they find flesh and the opportunity to reproduce themselves.