I sure hope Frodo makes it back to the Shire alive and well.
I'm sorry Ogged, but Harry doesn't make it. He suffers a horrible Quidditch accident around page 350, and the book ends abruptly. One minute he's chasing the little thingy, and then the next 450 pages are blank.
I know you said, "no spoilers," but I just want to save you a world of pain. Get out while you still can.
2 - I thought using the Journey song right before Harry dies was a particularly nice touch.
there have been several spoilers for that joke, none of which involving bittorrent.
This is like when kids go to unbelievably heroic measures to cheat on an exam. You think, Really? Reading the book outloud into a microphone and then downloading the file onto your little earpiece-machiney-thingy was easier than just learning trigonometry?
I keep reading 1 as saying, "I sure hope Fredo makes it back to the Shire..."
Ssssh. No one tell NCP that Samwise has Frodo capped, halfway to Mordor. They leave his body in a swamp somewhere.
If 2 were correct, I would start a Nobel Prize campaign for her. That would be brilliant.
You'll have to wait until the director's cut hits stands to find out whether Tony is, in fact, a replicant.
Don Elrond, I come to you, on the day of your daughter's wedding...
(and may their first child be an elvish child!)
Blank pages would be too obvious.
9: It's too bad he won't live, Smasher. Of course... who does?
"of course" s/b "then again." Fuck.
Someone with access to the American edition of the book has taken a photograph of every one of the pages
I work at a place that does nothing else but photograph books. In pretty much exactly that manner [only without teh fingers holding the book]. Doing 800 pages that way would be time consuming.
Harry turns out to be a secret pervy hobbit fancier. Not to worry, though, Sam kills him before he can try anything.
12 "of course" s/b "But, you know, whatever..."
Harry realizes the wisdom of the No Relationship Policy.
As the camera pans down, Harry's womanly body is revealed to be adorned with a penis.
OT, but interesting: The boy who had his spelling corrected by Dan Quayle? He "dropped out of high school, had his first child by 16, two more by age 24, and was reportedly working a low paying job."
And Dan Quayle? '08's his year!
I know who dies:
http://www.zendurl.com/h/hallows/
18:
I work at a place that does nothing else but photograph books.
Really? But not in-print books, right?
27: Yes, that's the link referenced in the post.
As for "To what end?", you Potterheads are sick. The publishing industry cannot make heads or tails of you.
I always say: It's Just a Fucking Book! Get over it!
re: 28
We do in-print books too, but generally only if there's a very specific reason for it and only if there's clearance for it. Most of what we do is long out of print. Sometimes long long out print. 2000 year old papyrii and the like.
It's Just a Fucking Book! Get over it!
Don't even try to harsh my mellow, oldster. There's going to be a lot of Harry Potter around here in the next week.
The publishing industry cannot make heads or tails of you.
Not that they particularly mind, as long as you keep buying books.
There's going to be a lot of Harry Potter around here in the next week.
This is going to be hard for me. My wife's out of town for a week, and I'm not allowed to buy the book until she gets back. If one of you lets a spoiler slip, I'll have to destroy you.
that's definitely a Web 0.1 approach to piracy.
Don't even try to harsh my mellow, oldster.
That wasn't a reference to Harry Potter alone, you know.
There's going to be a lot of Harry Potter around here in the next week.
Not familiar with this euphemism.
Nattar's job sounds cool. Tedious at times. But books. Hi, my name is Will and I am an old book addict.
31:
Most of what we do is long out of print. Sometimes long long out print. 2000 year old papyrii and the like.
I'll give you the papyrii. Who gets to see the scans of these things, if you don't mind my asking?
I'll give you the papyrii
Not familiar with this euphemism.
He's gonna wake up and realize it was all just a dream.
I don't think something can be festooned with only one object.
My wife's out of town for a week, and I'm not allowed to buy the book until she gets back.
What! If this wasn't set in all caps in your prenup, you're nuts.
Who's going to be getting it at midnight then? Or do you get it earlier in foreign parts what with the time difference?
The two big girls and I had a great time getting #6 at midnight, so this year I'm taking all 4 - at the moment they're planning on dying their hair and going as a bunch of Weasleys, and trying to rope me into this too.
34 - yeah, sounds much better to buy it, read it before she gets back, and then it's hers - otherwise won't you be fighting over it?
parsimon hates books. Now we know.
I've actually agreed to DHL a copy of the damn book to a friend who's being taken on a birthday vacation to someplace unknown, and he's terrified he won't be able to find an English-language bookstore. Of course, this depends on his girlfriend telling me where to send the damn thing, which she hasn't done yet.
"Who's going to be getting it at midnight"
Familiar with this euphemism.
We're waking up the kids to get it at midnight even though they're way too young to read them yet, if they become fans later we figure they'll enjoy seeing pictures of themselves at the 7th release.
We might do one of these things as well, assuming the lawyers don't get there first
yeah, sounds much better to buy it, read it before she gets back, and then it's hers - otherwise won't you be fighting over it
No, see, we read it aloud, taking turns on alternate chapters.
Asilon sounds like a seriously fun mom.
parsimon hates books
parsimon sells books for a living.
parsimon sells books for a living.
So? Pimps sell women for a living. Doesn't mean that they don't hate women.
Over at the Florida Flophouse, we're throwing a full-on reading party. Complete with butterbeer (seen here), Felix Felicis, Skele-Grow, Polyjuice Potion, Veritaserum, and the Drink That Shall Not Be Named.
I'm seriously disappointed by the release date being just days before the bar exam. I'm sure I *could* take the, what, seven hours? eight? away from studying and it wouldn't be a big deal, but I wouldn't be able to enjoy it properly. And my long-suffering wife will have to wait the 5-6 days to talk about it... We may go and hang around the local release party for a while on Friday, though. Who can resist the musical headliners, Draco and the Malfoys, and the Hungarian Horntails?
The last one we just read simultaneously, in one sitting. She reads a bit faster than I do, so she had to wait a moment for each page-turn, but I guess that was better than waiting to start.
parsimon hates books
No. Librarians hate books. Parsimon isn't a librarian. Therefore, parsimon doesn't hate books.
49 is probably the cutest thing ever. I'm actually resisting doing the same with a book with Rah but mainly because I hate my own reading voice. I would love to have him just read the book to me. As it stands now he gets first crack at any book because it takes me for damned ever to finish anything.
This is a fantastic recipe for butter beer, but more suitable for colder weather.
It's Just a Fucking Book! Get over it!
There's fucking in book 7??? NO MORE SPOILERS, DAMMIT!
57 - You could listen to the Jim Dale audiobook together, which is what I'll be doing. He's so fantastic. The NYT had a profile of him today and there are samples of his previous Harry Potter audiobooks accessible on the page.
49: That's what my wife and I plan to do as well. We'll play rock-paper-scissors as soon as the book arrives on Saturday to determine who reads the first chapter.
That's not a valid syllogism.
True, but teo, I fear you are not attending to the content provided you. Which is, admittedly, of prurient interest only to booksellers, librarians, and possibly academics.
I register TJ's 52 as hostile. Rumble?
It beats standing around down on Scarborough street.
61: Neither of us are into the Potter series, it's some other book he wants us to read to each other. Today I cannot remember what book and that makes me a bad boyfriend for this five minute span. At any rate, neither of us have anything against the Pottermania, either. People excited about a book? Fuck yeah.
I read the spoilers. I lack self-control.
I read the spoilers too. I can't believe Snape was sexxing Hermione.
60- "Dumbledore... Did things with a wand I'd never seen before."
Or that Hermione was cheating on Luna with Snape.
Sin is its own punishment. I am the embodiment of that principle.
70: Wow! I always thought Snape was playing Quidditch for the other team, IYKWIM.
60: Well, it is thought that Voldemort wanted something that belonged to Rowena Ravenclaw.
When #6 came out, I forgot it was Potter night and went out to a late movie by myself. When I came back to the Slope, it was 1am and every business was open with its lights on. I couldn't figure out what was happening until I walked past the B&N. It was like the whole neighborhood had turned into an all-night party full of well-behaved, happy children! Very cute.
Wow! I always thought Snape was playing Quidditch for the other team, IYKWIM.
In more ways than one, evidently.
--- I rather wish she would make one of the good guys come out as gay in the 7th book, just to piss off the fundies.
77: The fundies are already horrified at how HP is promoting witchcraft.
I'm so tempted to read the spoilers. Text, you are a Bad Influence.
While I'm not an HP fan, the Onion article on HP's promotion of witchcraft was the funniest thing I've ever read.
I read the spoilers so you don't have to.
It's only a matter of time until we all read them.
Think of it this way: when has your enjoyment of anything really good been reduced by prior knowledge of its plot-elements? All the Greeks knew what happened to Oedipus.
Having read them, though, text, I would recommend against doing so. There are a lot of big surprises that would give great excitement to someone who's been following, and it really would be disappointing to know in advance.
Also, the spoilers are not very discreet--they give away a lot of how and when and where stuff, not just plot points. Also, there are synopses of each chapter. It would be like someone describing every scene of a movie to you before you saw it.
How about someone who hasn't read the books but has rather enjoyed the movies?
83 raises a strong point. 84 does too. Nobody should read the spoilers.
That said, the pictures of the pages are a little blurry, but totally readable.
Otherwise you might miss out on some good incest.
I didn't mean it at all, parsimon.
Though I guess authorial intent is immaterial.
I'd prefer that instead of a "rumble" we have a "mumble."
If anyone posts a spoiler on Unfogged, I will hunt him/her down and fucking cut them.
Not that I care, but is there some time after which everyone who's obsessed is assumed to have read the book and it can be discussed, or is it unmentionable forever?
If 77 is a real spoiler, I will fuck you up.
Becks won't be done with the Audio book until sometime in mid-August, but I'll surely have ruined it for her by then.
92: I read the spoilers so I could know if someone dropped one and tell you to redact it.
66 s/b "it beats standing around on that street that starts with Scar."
I read the spoilers too. I haven't even read any of the books, but I nonetheless now feel truly godlike, possessing a detailed knowledge of the future hidden from you mere mortals. The high I'm getting from this incredible power is unreal.
90 is totally a spoiler for my fan-fiction.
"it beats standing around on that street that starts with Scar."
In a recent interview, she said that "scar" is no longer the last word.
SPOILER ALERT
"Scar" is the eleventh-to-last word.
I once enraged my fiancee by guessing the twist-ending to a movie we were watching together, and whispering it to her, half-way through. I thought this was unfair. I mean, I couldn't have known for sure that I was right.
Wait, what am I saying?
Everyone thank me. I'm doing my Potter trolling over at Yglesias.
Cut it out even with the fake spoilers, people.
The last word means "scar" in Urdu, if you transliterate it using the appropriate algorithm which is encoded into the chapter titles of the first, fifth, and fourth books (in that order).
102/105: Is that just after all the ships break apart and we lose track of Uther Doul?
People are going to want to discuss the books. I'd assumed we'd put up some posts this weekend and ask people to confine any spoilery HP talk to those threads.
Not that I care, but is there some time after which everyone who's obsessed is assumed to have read the book and it can be discussed, or is it unmentionable forever?
Noon on Saturday.
I don't understand—can't you, too, read it, Becks? Have you sworn your firstborn if you don't audiobook it?
106 wasn't a fake spoiler. I just meant, of course I was right.
But ogged, you might want to consider shutting down this thread.
But ogged, you might want to consider shutting down this thread.
Because she could blow any minute? You don't know how much longer you can hold out?
It was like the whole neighborhood had turned into an all-night party full of well-behaved, happy children!
What'd I say, AWB? Fey!
For the record, fuckers, my heart is beating faster as I'm scrolling up and everyone keeps saying "x better not be a real spoiler." Text, I will bite your torso.
I'm really not sure how much longer I can hold out.
You're safe, 'smasher. This thread is clean! /poltergeist
I don't know how the Flophouse will get all their important reading done that night if they are totally 'smashed.
111: So unfair. Some of us are plenty obsessed, but slow readers. Now I'm going to have to wade through 800 pages in the next two weeks and then still have 800 comments to get through when I'm done.
I totally won't spoil anything, but I worry that as the nonsuperfans continue to read the spoilers, the likelihood that someone slips-up increases.
Please, nobody cut me.
Asilon sounds like a seriously fun mom.
Ha - well, if I dye my hair ginger I might be, if not I might be the worst mother in the world.
124: They keep upping the stakes, don't they?
Harry lives through the end of book 7.
Harry dies during book 7.
Harry dies, and is resurrected during book 7.
Harry dies, is resurrected, and then dies again, ending the book dead.
Harry is undead at the end of book 7.
I'm pretty sure that at least ONE of those constitutes a spoiler, unless the Heisenberg principle becomes involved.
The mere fact of everyone reading Harry Potter affects what happens to him.
They should totally ship out a couple different editions randomly mixed, so when people start commenting on various sites at noon on Saturday there will be massive fighting. "So sad he died." "What do you mean he died?" "What the hell are you talking about?" "What book did you read dumbass?"
I like the audiobooks, dammit. That's how I've done the first 6 books. I'm not changing now.
Becks, after the last HP gab-fest, I actually got off my duff and set up the site I was muttering about. It should be good to go by Friday if you want to shunt Harry Potter discussion elsewhere.
128 may be the greatest idea in the history of literature.
118 better not be a real spoiler.
if I dye my hair ginger I might be,
Kool Aid. Seriously. It's temporary.
134: Plus, it makes you smell a little like strawberries. I miss college now.
134: Ratio of water to powder? I have a small girl who will think you a goddess if she gets Kool-Aid dyed hair on Friday!
118 had better not be a real tease, is what I'm talking about.
Damn, I should have thought of that last year -- I got one of those nasty spray cans of temp color for Sally's costume, when orange KoolAid would have worked okay.
136: Open several packets into a pot, add just enough water to make a thin paste, and heat it a bit to dissolve any chunks. Then hold each lock of hair over a piece of tin foil and paint the paste on with a basting brush, taking care not to get the scalp (not that it will burn, just might look bad). Crunch up the foil into balls around the head. Let it sit for an hour, then rinse it out with water. All the color will be gone after 4-5 shampoos.
As those who have signed up for the Boston meetup know, I live on a fairly busy road where people are often stuck in traffic in the morning. (I've thoght of putting up political statements around election time, but it's MA so what difference would it make.)
I suppose I would be a bad person if I read the spoilers then put a big poster on my front porch that said "Character X is dead!"
Excellent, AWB! We may have to give that a test run tonight (in case the color needs any tweaking)(because this sounds incredibly fun and I can't wait to play).
Way too much m-fun going on here. Have some dignity, people.
Oh -- and, of course, get the sugarless kind. Not that you'd need me to say that.
Oh! Yeah, that would make sense. And yeah, I did need you to say that...
I read the spoilers and now I feel sick and anxious. Midnight Saturday cannot get here soon enough.
The spoilers are all fake. Nothing is sacred. The falconer has lost his falcon some place.
The mere fact of everyone reading Harry Potter affects what happens to him.
Clap your hands if you believe!
You don't really have to mess with the tinfoil and brush--just dunk your hair in the bowl and pour/comb the Koolaid through your hair. You can add conditioner if you like. Just make sure the hair is dry before you wash it, and the color will stay for a week, ish.
Directions here (scroll down to section IV).
147:
I told one of my wives about the link, and she avidly glommed all the spoilers, then read the epilogue pages and said at least several of the spoilers were wrong. This assumes the epilogue pages were real, of course. I could see someone using the previous books' formatting to create fake pages, just 'cause.
But Rosebud was his broom.
Thanks B. We'll try again with the dunk method. We tried the brush on thing last night, but I think we washed out too soon. She got a few pretty highlights out of it, at least...
One copy of the book landed on the doorstep of William Collier, an Atlanta engineer who, though only a casual Harry reader, had ordered an advance copy of "Deathly Hallows" off DeepDiscount. When the book arrived four days early, Collier took immediate and responsible action: He placed it on sale on eBay with a reserve price of $250. Collier said the book was purchased yesterday by an editor at Publisher's Weekly. Editors at Publisher's Weekly could not be reached for comment.
In lieu of further details, Collier responded by offering for $300 a written account of his story, which he'd sentimentally titled, "I Was an eBay Voldemort." The Washington Post declined.
152: I think I'm going to end up doing the same--PK wants to go as one of the Weasley brothers. I have to call the bookstore tomorrow (we're good customers, it's an independent, I know the owner) and ask her if it's going to be okay if he brings those little champagne popper toys b/c he's determined to set off fireworks....
