So did you get either of their numbers?
I think it's cool that Wingnut Lifeguard knows your name. I'm good at getting to the friendly chit-chat phase with people I see every day but am very bad about introducing myself and getting to the calling each other by our first names phase. Mark does that effortlessly, which I admire.
Who's Mark?
Does he know your first name?
I'm good at getting to the friendly chit-chat phase with people I see every day but am very bad about introducing myself and getting to the calling each other by our first names phase.
Me too. One problem is that once you've been talking to someone for a while, it's mighty awkward to ask "so, what's your name?"
it's mighty awkward to ask "so, what's your name?"
Nah, you just say "I'm Teo, by the way" one day when you're talking.
Teo, you're getting to the age where I realized "Okay, even if I have no reason to believe the person I'm talking to wants to know my name, I should introduce myself anyway."
It's easier for me though, because my name is only three syllables first and last.
Nah, you just say "I'm Teo, by the way" one day when you're talking.
Still awkward.
In 7 what I was trying to say was that I realized that I should just introduce myself as soon as possible. Even before I develop (or do not develop) a rapport with the person I'm talking to. It's the socially lubricating thing to do.
Ditto 2 and 5. Part of it is a slightly private/standoffish/whatever nature, but I think Teofilo makes a good point: getting to the names sooner rather than later makes things much easier.
in my neck of the woods, at the end of a conversation people will often smile at you, look you in the eye, stick out a hand, and say, "George" (or whatever their name is), and you respond. Not awkward. Ritual. In fact, ritual for getting over the awkward.
sort of. you get to wait to the end of the conversation to decide if you really want to bother to introduce self or not.
15: But what if one person does and the other one doesn't? My way is better.
Only if you're neurotic.
I'll say. Personally, I forget people's names at least three times before I learn them, so I'm constantly reintroducing myself to people I've talked to before. It makes me seem brain damaged, but it's kind of social.
Was I wrong to accept these favors? One could argue that I was, although I believe that the particulars, of which I self-servingly keep you ignorant, absolve me in each case.
People shouldn't be blowing their grandkids in the pool anyhow.
People shouldn't be blowing their grandkids in the pool anyhow.
Or so the mullahs would have you believe.
16: uh, most times people can sense these things.
mrmf, mmf!, and mcmc should have a fight.
mmf! and i would probably prefer a love-in.
Let's get ready to rumrmfmmfmcmcble!
I imagine "mrmf", "mmf!", and "mrh" as monosyllables, but "mcmc" would have to be two syllables.
Don't tell me that you and mmf! know each other, and therefore probably a third commenter as well?
Which is not to say that the love-in sounds a worse option. Heavens no.
but we still haven't discussed how much it sucks that ogged took advantage of his male privilege in the grocery store and cut in line in front of that poor woman.
also i want to know what 'rich-looking' means.
Would the love-in still require a refereee?
Options for "mrmf":
(A) it stands for "mister mmf!" and should be pronounced accordingly
(B) it should be pronounced "murmph"
(C) it should pronounced "em are em eff"
also i want to know what 'rich-looking' means.
It means she looked rich.
i want to know what 'rich-looking' means.
The guy asked her several times to stop burning hundreds in the store; she was totally asking for it.
I'm in the introducing yourself camp. Why wouldnt you? People are so afraid to talk with others.
The only reason not to introduce yourself is:
1. you are a clingy stalker
2.they are a clingy stalker.
If they are the clingy stalker, then you need to learn how to firmly and politely walk away from a clingy person.
I go with "murmph". If you want something to be pronounced as initials, then capitalize them, put periods between them, or both.
Likewise, eb, rm, and bitchphd (also one syllable).
oooh. "mr. mf" is almost as good as mr. lady. a moniker i have always wanted to steal.
Also, the lifeguard clearly knew that Ogged needed the practice. Lifguard is thinking "Poor thing...he works so hard at it. You have to give him credit for effort."
32: wait, you pronounce it like "bitchfud"? You are a strange person.
35, my eyes tell me I should do so.
"Mr. Lady" is not as good a moniker as "Uncle Grandma".
How I mentally pronounce your pseudonyms:
E.B.
M.R.H.
Bitch, P.H.D.
M.C.M.C.
M.M.F
Mr. Mif.
DS I pronounce "Slack."
"Mr. Lady" is not as good a moniker as "Uncle Grandma".
YOU TELL EM
E.B.
M.R.H.
Bitch, P.H.D.
M.C.M.C.
M.M.F
Mr. Mif.
DS I pronounce "Slack."
But "L." you pronounce "llllulllll, period". Right?
But do you imagine the accents of various commenters?
For some reason, I think of FL as having a Princeton accent and LB as being very New Englandy.
Lifguard is thinking "Poor thing...he works so hard at it. You have to give him credit for effort."
Or, "No way I'm letting the Persian Paddler share a lane with these white people. What's next? Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together -- mass hysteria..."
Ayup. Just came from havin' a dish of chowdah.
"Ayuh" would be canonical. Also I'm thinking the chowdah would be in a bowl.
Wow. As of 12, I pronounce "teofilo":
tee-off-fill-o
I mentally pronounced Ogged "Ahmedinejad," until 42.
Speaking of NE, the pronunciation in 32/35 sounds the name of a particularly opinionated town in suburban Mass.
I awkwardly find that I am surrounded by friends who are bad with names. So I follow what seem to be the names my friends say for people, like, during softball games, and then, later, realize that I have everyone's name wrong. This has been humiliating, especially in the context of flirting.
AWB:
Just use "Babe" or "Dude." Nobody realize that you don't actually know their name.
Oh, and don't forget to wink at them and point your finger at them like a mock gun when you do.
And make sure there's a cigarette dangling from your lips, and that your finger is pointing at their genitals.
53 is pretty much the AWB MO. I am so smooth.
Many people here posting under pseuds are abreviated to acronyms in references. This is true of me, for instance, and when I see it, I mentally pronounce the acronym—ellbee, aydeepee, ehdoubleyoubee. I think it would seem odd to use the full name in a reference, although visitors sometimes do this, but no regulars. Probably how we think of each other much of the time,
I've know guys who constantly referred to other guys as:
- "ace"
- "champ"
- "big guy"
- "big fella"
- "B"
- "playa"
Any of those would be great for making the guys on the softball team treat you as less of a ladylike lady.
48, 49:
Fitchburg? I'm, like, from right near there. wtf. Athol is aka radio-free Athol.
huh.
56: Eh, I've moved past all that now toward playful horsing around.
I know a guy who constantly refers to everyone, male and female, as "babe". Could be worth a shot!
Taking your cues from the rugby video, one presumes.
57: I didn't think he was actually talking about a real town. It would have to be "Bitchford," wouldn't it?
Secondhand college hi-jinks: visit a coffee shop in Athol, ask the waitress where you are, when she says "you're in Athol," say "well you're a fucking bitch," and storm out.
61 to 58.
The person who calls everyone "B" is actually a woman, now that I think more clearly.
"champ" is another one.
"scout" sounds more like what the pediatrician calls the kids. Mine called me and my sister both "tiger".
62 gets it wrong. You need to respond to the waitress with something that makes use of a lisp, to make it clear what you're doing.
I use the word "playa" in court every time I forget the judge's name:
Judge: "Please draft that Order."
Me: "Fo Sho, Playa!"
"Slugger" works with the context.
I suck at remembering names, but oh well.
It's helpful when someone, like Ogged, simply has their name tattooed across their chest.
I call little boys "buddy" and little girls "sweetheart." I blame the patriarchy.
60, I did play intramural soccer.
Mine called me and my sister both "tiger".
Did you roar your terrible roars and show your terrible claws?
I call all women 5 years older than me or younger "kiddo."
It's affectionate, you see.
"Sarge".
Guys only. Sorry, bitches.
B, if you slept with any post-pubescent males you'd realize that a tattoo on a real man's chest would not be helpful, because it would be covered with ultra-manly hair.
Er, what am I talking about, I said "champ" twice. One of them was supposed to be "chief".
The guy who said "champ" was REALLY AN ASSHOLE. Don't go that route unless it's really sarcasm time.
68: See, this is the advantage of long-haired boys. They get called "sweetheart" as well as "buddy."
73: Keep telling yourself that, fuzzy.
74: "big guy" is the real sign of an asshole.
Ogged:
When you decide to be a swimmer, you are going to have to rid yourself of significant amounts of hair.
Start with the shears.
Btw, Ogged, how *was* the sex with redbull guy?
"big guy" is the real sign of an asshole.
Nah, "big guy" is pretty common and doesn't necessarily indicate an asshole. "Playa" I'm having trouble even imagining used unironically, however.
"Playa" I'm having trouble even imagining used unironically, however.
Imagine the tour guide from Everything is Illuminated, but much shorter and Albanian instead of Ukrainian.
When you decide to be a swimmer
You can't bait me, playa.
81: when used to refer to adults? Pretty good indicator, I've found.
I like "T-Bone," but it tends to confuse people.
Nah, "big guy" is pretty common and doesn't necessarily indicate an asshole
Okay, now you're trolling.
T-bone was an excellent Seinfield episode.
I'm planning to start using "son" as soon as I turn 40. I may also phase in "toots".
I tend to call a certain kind of woman friend (LeBlanc's a good example of the type) "woman." As in, "hey, woman."
Ned, that just isnt nice. Take it back now!!! 40 isnt old.
Homies, I can think of at least one friend who greets people with "Hey, big guy." Wasn't in a frat, suburban doctor, two kids, nice guy.
I like "T-Bone," but it tends to confuse people.
Then try "Sir Loin."
My grandpa used to call all women younger than himself "darlin," and I always found it charming. SUE ME.
At a certain age (NOT 40!@!@!@@!@!!!!!), you can use darlin' or honey or other terms of endearment.
Is the claim that all nicknames not tied to a person's identity are wrong?
It's revolting that I very occasionally call younger men friends--even the ones I'm not sleeping with--"sweetie," isn't it?
but you will be sleeping with them, right?
"Baby g" is another personal favorite, although obviously not in all circumstances.
Don't use that tone with ME, Marcus [Fill in middle and last name]!
97: Shockingly, probably not. The current crop seem to have settled into actual friendship.
Horrifying, I know.
What can I say? Young men are all prudish and shit.
Back when I was a young man, we had to walk uphill in the snow both ways to have sex with Bitch Phd.
Patently false. Bitch Phd hates snow.
103: everybody shits, B. You can't expect us men to be perfectly clean, angelic creatures all the time.
Look, it's shitting or it's fucking me. Priorities, babe.
108: one's just not fun without the other.
A co-worker and I were chatting w/a friendly patron recently. She said that she found people around these parts (northern NJ/NY area) used others' names in conversation more than where she came from (Seattle). E.g., 'Liz, I saw that book and thought of you.' Thing is, she thinks interjecting names makes the conversation seem more formal and standoffish. Liz (my co-worker) and I thought the opposite, that it makes the conversation chummier and more intimate.
What do people here think?
I think it sounds fake and salesmanish.
I'm no-name like the woman from Seattle. And I have encountered people who want to insert names in speech more, though I don't associate with an area, or anything else systematic.
110: It's sounds smarmy unless it's sold with enough warmth and conviction, in which case it's charming.
Huh. I like names in conversation. Friendly patron Cassie says there's no need for names: she knows me, I know her. She does often begin sentences with 'Hey', which I find off-putting.
One time I used my friend's name when addressing him and he stopped and said "What the fuck was that about?" It does seem to me alienating among close friends, but I'm sure styles differ.
I use it as a specifically affectionate thing, although I don't know how that comes off. It's enough of a challenge for me to learn somebody's name, I might as well use it.
Occasionally, when affecting a Cheesy Strate Guy persona, I refer to other dudes/blokes/chaps as "sport," "beef," and my favorite, "Honus" (as in, the dead baseball player). "Big slugger" is also a favorite, but we covered that territory already.
54: I think you meant "smoove," right?
68: I take a completely unironic and probably somehow Southern pleasure in calling little girls "Sweetheart."
When a dude uses my name, pointedly, in conversation, I assume it means we're going to do it.
Cassie is about 25 yo and tends toward the snarky side. I wonder if there's any age/generational correlation to preferring not to use names.
When she comes in to the library, she might greet me with, 'Hey. How's it going?' I'd much prefer to lose the 'Hey.' and have my name used or even not used.
Cerebrocrat, you homo, don't make me scroll.
When a dude uses my name, pointedly, in conversation, I assume it means we're going to do it.
There was more to this question than I thought.
I've always had a hard time remembering names, mostly because when I meet people I'm so focused on reading their faces I tune out what they're saying. So especially since my daughters inflicted brain damage on me in their infancy, I pretty much don't bother anymore, and just hope I won't have to do introductions at some point.
hope I won't have to do introductions at some point.
That's easy. You just say, "oh, have you two met?" and then they usually step in and introduce their own damn selves.
when I meet people I'm so focused on reading their faces I tune out what they're saying
Yeah, I can't remember names when people tell them to me, but have no trouble if I hear them tell someone else. I'm sure the cognitive psych people have a name for this.
124: I always pick up on this as a dodge.
126: I'm sure people realize it's a dodge, but it's a graceful way of handling the situation.
Cerebrocrat, you homo, don't make me scroll.
Damn, Honus, I didn't know you were serious about that shit.
I just revert to my roots and call all people, of all genders, of all ages, 'hon'. Unless they're close personal friends, then they're my bitches.
Cassie is about 25 yo and tends toward the snarky side. I wonder if there's any age/generational correlation to preferring not to use names.
28, snarky, and yeah, people name-dropping me in conversation weirds me out, possibly because I've never really liked mine.
possibly because I've never really liked mine.
?!?!? "Rockette" is an awesome name.
124: That's the basic strategy. Gets tricky sometimes, but most people know what to do. I doubt I could pull it off as well in a less casual part of the country.
Damn, Honus, I didn't know you were serious about that shit.
Sweetheart, I'm always serious.
When a dude uses my name, pointedly, in conversation, I assume it means we're going to do it.
Exactly.
I'm sure the cognitive psych people have a name for this.
Not that they covered in my brain disorders class, but maybe it doesn't rise to that level. Language processing is so f'in' weird.
127: I can't even play like I'm dodging. I just try to tell people as clearly and forthrightly as possible that I forget everyone's names all the time, and they should do their best not to take it personally.
130: Hurr. See, my actual first name is just very unsuited to me, and the standard diminuzation everyone goes with is pornstar-tacular and contrived, to the point of making me cringe. So when people use it they think they're being friendly or whatever, but no, they just seem like douchebags.
28, snarky, and yeah, people name-dropping me in conversation weirds me out
When I think of name-dropping, I think of using a name to impress someone. When I use someone's name in conversation, I'm not doing it to impress anyone. Although I'd agree that I use a person's name to give the impression that I like the person, to reaffirm chumminess, etc. (among other reasons), but that's a different kind of impression.
If there is an age/generation/snark/nameless policy correlation, I now wonder if it's bc there's no room in snarkitude for expressing chumminess, likeability, etc.
I suffer from the name problem. My dodge is to find somebody whose name no one could possibly forget (professor, boss, ridiculously hot girl), and pretend to forget their name. That way, when I forget someone else's name, they figure I'm autistic and don't feel so bad.
Aw, see, I don't feel so bad if it's someone whose name I have no obvious reason to remember, but if I'm flirting with a dude, have a rapport, etc., and it turns out our mutual friend had the wrong name for him, it sucks to pointedly say his name and get a funny look, like, "Oh, I thought you liked me, but obviously, you don't."
there's no room in snarkitude for expressing chumminess, likeability, etc.
What? Of course there is. People do it here all the time.
134: I hadn't thought of "fun bags" as a dimunization, per se, but yeah, it's kind of porny.
Also who else is playing the "guess Rockette's real name by looking up porn stars" game right now?
Rockette, your real name is Candee?
Is the class really called brain "disorders?"
137: I see your point, Moon Unit Zappa.
135: When I think of name-dropping, I think of using a name to impress someone.
Yeah, I was just abusing the phrase to sum up "using my name in conversation in a casual but pointed way", basically because I suck at words.
What? Of course there is. People do it here all the time.
Off the top of my head, I can think of a good four friendships of mine where the entire relationship is based around giving each other good-natured cheap shit.
140: [Redacta].
What? Of course there is. People do it here all the time.
Maybe you're not all as snarky as you think you are.
But, yes, ogged, I expressed myself badly. I think what I'm trying to get at is if there's any kind of link between the harshness of snark/very pointed conversation/etc. and avoidance of using others' names.
Lunar Rockette is just a font of great new (to me) words. First there was "endonged," and now, "pornstartacular."
[Redacta], for real? That's totally awesome. You should play it up, woman.
134: Easy solution: insist everyone use your "street name." I recommend "shadow" or "fade", but really you can choose anything if you're pushy enough about it.
'Endonged' is great. For some reason I saw this and thought to modify it to 'overly endonged'.
Should 143 be redacted, or is Rockette either (a) lying or (b) not as paranoid as the rest of us? Awesome, either way.
If (b) is the case, Rockette, I promise to only call you "Arla."
Following from that, I also promise to keep bugging you to sing that song about Al's Restaurant, but that's neither here nor there.
When I think of name-dropping, I think of using a name to impress someone.
Yeah. People name-dropping me in conversation weirds me out.
is Rockette either (a) lying
I hope so. It would be depressing if someone with a 'nym that clever turned out also to have cool name.
144: It just seems like a funny expression to me. "Brain diseases," "brain damage," or "cognitive disorders" I get, but a "brain disorder," I don't know what that's supposed to mean, exactly. Eh, not important. It just struck me as weird.
Uh, yeah that's really my name, and, uhhh... I guess probably redacting would be good? But really, I'm pretty sure I never ever would have been able to have my clearance renewed anyway and at this point I'm also damn certain I never want to work in an industry that requires it again, so whatever.
146: This is because I am like autistic or brain-damaged or something, and am actually really horrible at words, and often end up going off the description deep-end when trying to come up with a perfectly normal word or phrase that would be readily apparent to anyone whose brain actually worked properly. But, um, woo!
Lunar in 129: people name-dropping me in conversation weirds me out
DS in 151: People name-dropping me in conversation weirds me out.
Lunar = DS!
153: Brain Disorders and Cognition was the full name of the class. Maybe because it mostly dealt with lesion-induced conditions?
Hmm. The name, [excised to allow easier redaction], is tough to dimune. Starrie works, I guess. You could go the russian route and come up with a nickname completely unrelated to the actual name. Or you could go with Estrella, which sounds nice. FWIW I do not associate [excised to allow easier redaction] with porn. I myself have an awkward name, but it is one that I like. I will not give it, but suffice to say it connotes a degree of wealth/social status which I do not have. Still like it though.
Well, it could be worse. "Star" could be short for "Starfucker."
A non-exhaustive search turns up one pornstar named "Star," one named "[Redacta]," and one named "Starr." Still, they're outnumbered by variants of "Sierra," so I think you're okay.
I think it's an awesome name.
I had a student once named a version of that, and she was such an ass-kicker that no way in hell I ever even *thought* "porn star" when talking to her.
It would be different if it was "Misty" or "Chrystal."
156: yeah, see, I'd call lesioned-induced conditions either brain damage, or cognitive disorders, depending on what I was talking about. But only a developmental thing like Williams Syndrome seems to qualify as a "brain disorder." But, it kind of doesn't matter, and is also boring to everyone else in the thread, so maybe I'll be shutting up now.
Did I mention that while I like to call little girls "sweetheart," I call little boys "sweetback?" It doesn't go over as well with the parents.
160: or "Candy." Lots of Candys in the porn biz.
I guess I'm just pissed because many of my female relatives have awesome, ethnically-appropriate names like Agnieszka and Julianna, and I get... something my mom picked out from a Georgette Heyer novel or something, seriously, wtf?
161: I call little boys "sweetback?"
Can't imagine why anyone would object to that.
I like the name "[LR's real name]." I have a friend named "Sunshine," and occasionally when I mention this I get some dumbass eyerolling or comments about hippy parents. But I frankly love the name "Sunshine" in a completely unironic way, and I don't see how a name that brings to mind an unambiguously good referent can be bad. I kinda feel the same about "[LR's real name]."
Rockette, Redacta is a friggin' awesome name.
And by "Redacta" I mean your real name; I'm not making a joke. I love it.
Although "Redacta" would actually be a pretty cool name.
161: some random .edu calls you busted.
163: eh, that lamb of God stuff gets old. C'mon, you got a Latin name, what're you complaining about? At least it's not Madyson.
One of my favorite things about my name is that not only do I have an accidental namesake (parents didn't know about him, picked same combo of family names coincidentally), I'm related to him on both my mother's and father's sides.
Man, now if I ever have kids and wind up with a girl, I'm actually going to name her Redacta, in proper perpetuating-the-cycle-of-abuse fashion, and use the same ridiculous excuse my mom used on me at one point when I was bemoaning my name teenagerially: "well, there's a Saint Redacta, so it's fine". Which is not only untrue, but extra retarded considering our household was pretty pointedly agnostic.
That's what happens with us WASPs.
159:
Let's not go overboard here. It's above-average, definitely, maybe even good. It's a damn sight better than "Mary" or "Samantha." But awesome must be reserved for the truly awesome, like Gwyneth or Genevieve. For guys, awesome is Adrian or Simon.
If I ever have kids I will name my firstborn null character. This is why no one should have sex with me.
170: Alternatively, you could explain to her that she was named after a sophisticated automation tool for easy interfacing.
One of the kids at the daycare where my sister works is named Loricious. There are some other kids with interesting names, but I can't think of any right now.
Dude, Gwyneth? Take your pug and your artisanal wallpaper and get out of here, hipster.
Also Adrian, while okay, is hardly the be-all-end-all of male names. That is reserved for names like "Truck" or "Maimonides."
the truly awesome, like Gwyneth or Genevieve. For guys, awesome is Adrian or Simon
???
well, there's a Saint Redacta, so it's fine
See, I got so irked when my CCD teacher said that there had to be a Saint B., because every child was named after a saint. I've always liked my name because no one else (not literally, but almost) has it.
"Adrian" is in the same register as "Nigel."
I tried to convince my friend to name his kid Menelaus, but he had a girl. I don't think he was going to do it anyway, to be honest.
I have a very close friend who was insistent on naming her son "B/axter B/arnabus." We managed to talk her out of it, but our pleasure was short-lived, as her plan B turned out to be "M/erlin K/ermit." Kid seems to be doing okay, though.
I've kind of realized that all the names I like for kids have the same consonant sounds as PK's name. It's kinda weird.
Anyhoo, Rockette has those same sounds, so I'll put it on the "possible girls names" list unless Rockette feels all possessive about it.
183: She should name her second son "Thurman Merman."
167: Heh, thanks. If my mom wasn't back at her hotel and probably asleep by now, I would convey your approval to her. And then she'd use it for the rest of time as proof against me, "see, what are you complaining about? Even that internet person liked it! And he was Iranian! Even Iranians like your name! You complain too much!"
Oh, I totally love the friend in 183. Merlin and Kermit are both pretty cool boys names, despite lacking my preferred consonant sounds.
"B/xter B/rnabus" is a great name combo, Tweety, what's your problem?
If I have a son I'd give serious thought to naming him Hanuman.
187: I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that you'd say that.
Hanuman is awful. Obviously you should never have children, Tweety.
Merlin and Kermit are both pretty cool boys names tantamount to child abuse
Fixed.
190: That's because they are. And I'm always right.
184: Not at all, especially since I've discharged my duty and warned you of the potential pitfalls ahead of time. Also, on the Saint. B thing: I've heard this happening to other people. Seriously, people, the Church was kind of bad before they put in all the processes for this stuff, but they weren't pre-cognitive or anything.
DS is also not allowed to have children.
191: Hanuman rules. Is it my fault more Americans don't name their children for mischevious Hindu deities? Plus, if Star Wars was still cool his friends could call him "Han."
Look, seriously. The problem with Kermit is that we all associate it with the green frog.
But Jim Henson is dead, people, and there are tons of kids shows out there. These days, the window for Sesame Street exposure ends when they turn like three or something. Kids aren't going to have that association, the way we do, so fuck it.
And anyway, having a cool name that no one else has is, um, cool.
I'm trying to puzzle out what PK's name is. So far I've come up with "Ralston."
198: If you email me, I'll tell you.
"Listeria" would work, but I guess that's a girl's name.
I'm pretty sure that PK's name starts with the first syllable of a famous shrubbery, and ends with the abbreviation for a famous state. But maybe I am on crack.
Er, famous state s/b Southern state.
Kermit is okay. This Kermit is definitely okay. Kermit and Merlin together? I think not, especially if the family name is something like Sherman. Kermit McDermott? Maybe.
208: I just worry they're setting him up for a life in Mime.
I joke, he's a great kid. Very smart, as you might hope.
I'm trying to puzzle out what PK's name is. So far I've come up with "Ralston."
It could also be "Lester". Or "Törless".
I should admit that I have misled you somewhat--PK's name has two of the three consonants in Rockette. The one that's the easiest to slur, it lacks.
I've mentioned before that my great-grandfather's name was Orange.
Oh, okay, then: I was thinking "Mulva", which is a seriously awesome-ass Southern name, aside from the "rhymes-with-vulva" part.
I know PK's name and "Rockette has those same sounds" makes no sense to me.
Okay, you like "Mulva" and you reject "Rockette."
Clearly you are insane.
To all the Gwyneth/Adrian haters: aesthetics are personal. I tried, in naming my hypothetical children, to a)give them cool names, and b)protect them from humiliation. I even considered nicknames for them, though, now that I think about it, only for the girls (gwyneth= gwen, genevieve = jenny). I'm sure the proper authorities will be along shortly to explain my misogyny. What young adrian's going to do I don't know, but I expect he'll learn to fight like I did, only, in a boy named sue type of way. Like I said, aesthetics are personal, and if you think it's a good idea to name your son "Rainbow" I will not interfere.
216: Does "Redacta has those same sounds" make any more sense?
216: I think she means Rockette's real name.
218: Nope, only daughters. They had cool names too, though.
PK's name has two of the three consonants in Rockette
Three?
I think she means Rockette's real name.
Then it makes even less sense.
The trouble with "kermit" is that it rhymes with "hermit" and sounds vaguely like "erma." You might as well name a kid "target."
The trouble with "merlin" should need no explaining. (And "hanuman" too, for that matter.)
I note that she hasn't said no to 212 yet.
Törless is an awesome name for a child.
217: Clearly you are insane are a language-retardo and have no idea how to process what blocks of letters make which sounds and are signifi WORDS WORDS LOL.
Fixed.
I tried, in naming my hypothetical children, to a)give them cool names, and b)protect them from humiliation.
In my experience, your (b) tends to be hugely overrated by most people.
BTW, OT: Magpie and I made it out to meet Heebie and her boyfriend today... where the fuck were the rest of you slackers?
(If we ever do another meetup at the Exploratorium, we have to plan a bit better; sadly the Tactile Dome was sold out by the time we got there.)
There's a K now? In that case it must be "Kratos".
aesthetics are personal
This is a common misconception. Actually, aesthetics are either objectively good (mine) or objectively bad (to the degree they deviate from mine).
That said, I didn't mean to suggest that "Adrian" is "boy named Sue" territory. For that, you need M/rlin K/rmit.
223: She seems to be miscounting the number of consonants in Rockette.
In a perfect world (and I mean literally perfect, in every possible way), PK would be named "Telstar."
229: Magpie and I made it out to meet Heebie and her boyfriend today... where the fuck were the rest of you slackers?
Chillin' with my homies mommy (and dad and significant others).
169: Cognitive disorders are necessarily brain disorders, and these are increasingly common after middle age. Perhaps the most important of these illnesses is Alzheimer's disease
See, that's all I'm sayin'. And you know all they mean by that first bit is "if you can't think right it's 'cuz your brain is fucked up." So don't be starting shit between me and the random .edu.
That's what happens with us WASPs.
And see, here I thought it was the boxing. I may have to rethink.
170: If you have a boy, I should think that "Redactor" or "Redactus" would work.
Adrian is a fine name. Especially since, I shit you not, the number one boys' name in the US right now is Aidan, to which Adrian is very similar and therefore not tease-worthy at all.
I'm reasonably sure B's last name is not "Logistics".
I was thinking "Mulva"
which is a seriously awesome-ass Southern name
Mulva is not a Southern name, it's a Seinfeld punchline.
Oh, right, I can't count. One fucking glass of wine.
PK's name lacks the T and the R, all right? Fuckers.
I named a boy in Reno just to watch him sigh.
(Later on in life, that is.)
PK's name lacks the T and the R, all right? Fuckers.
Solon? Nils? Lisa?
Oh, right, I can't count. One fucking glass of wine.
So by "one", you mean "four"?
Mulva is not a Southern name, it's a Seinfeld punchline.
I know a Southerner who had it as his middle name, though, is the thing. Also an Alva! But woo, that must have been where I got it.
In my experience, your (b) tends to be hugely overrated by most people.
Perhaps, but parents should at least subject potential names to some basic tests, such as the switch-the-initials test, which a name such as 'Shiloh Pitt' clearly fails.
Oh, right, I can't count. One fucking glass of wine.
How many glasses did you think you'd had?
I think by way of that crazy maternal-family's-last-names-as-middle-name tradition? Or something similar.
247 pwned by 244.
245: Seriously? That is all kinds of fucked up. I've known an Alva or two, though.
How many glasses did you think you'd had?
Not enough, dammit.
At least one filthy rich Mulva.
Aha! PK is named Slim.
249: my parents did that, and my middle name is a language. Go figure.
246 is completely awesome.
Oh, dude, "Slim" would be such an awesome name. Sadly, I never had a man friend call me that, although both Mr. B. and the boyfriend have pretty awesome nicknames for me.
My great-grandfather was named Van Ev/rie. That was his first name, and it's my grandmother's middle name. He was named after John Van Ev/rie, whose historical importance becomes clear when you Google his name.
Sadly, I never had a man friend call me that
Is that because you're fat?
250: Yeah, and altogether he had a grand total of three truly awesome personal names, none of which would normally parse as actual names. [Redacted] Mulva [Redacted] [Redacted]. He was known as "Beck", which was a diminutive of [Redacted] no3, which was, um... his grandmother's maiden name, I think?
256: No, it's because I'm a broad.
You could go the russian route and come up with a nickname completely unrelated to the actual name.
Go by Sonechka.
Ooh, yeah, I like "Redacticus." And also "Hanuman."
Also: 214: did he have a William?
I feel like this could belong in so many other threads besides this one. Of course HE had william.
197: True story - Jim Henson bought the house next door to my parents, and disappointed the neighborhood by dying before the Christmas party.
255: well that's fun. You should change your name to that, too!
dying before the Christmas party
What an inconsiderate asshole.
What an inconsiderate asshole.
I know, right? All of a sudden, "viral infection."
Pussy.
I know, right? All of a sudden, "viral infection."
Shoulda ate dirt viruses.
Obligatory link to highly affecting Jim Henson discussion from the golden age of Unfogged.
And the strip being discussed is available.
All snark aside, I actually know the perfect name for a newly born man-child. Unfortunately, I cannot reveal it, because it happens to be my own, and my enemies are just waiting for me to slip up. I will however offer the pregnant a few choice names: 1)"Justin": He built the Hagia Sophia and was a shrewd son of a bitch.2) the aforementioned "Simon": What washington did for a few coastal colonies, mr. bolivar did for a continent. He was a political badasss without equal.3)"Jeremy" Not only did Mr. Bentham define utilitarianism, but he predicted the existence of the hedon, upom which unfogged is based.
267: You realize those are all fairly common names, right?
If Jim Henson had tongued his mother's ass, he would still be here today.
266: you know, I was just thinking that the pedophilic analingus discussion was okay by me, but the levity about Jim Henson dying was, like, a little much. Still bums me out.
Probably for the best he didn't live to see Frank Oz fall in with Al Qaeda, though.
Wait, is someone actually pregnant?
Anyway, I am enough of a pathetic nerd I would totally name a girl Samus, but most people would think I meant 'Seamus' and/or was functionally retarded.
I am pregnant … with possibility.
The question, LR, is if you would give your hypothetical daughter the middle name "Aran".
I would totally name a girl Samus
Okay, that's dorktastic.
On the other hand, it would completely absolve your mother.
Fuck yes!
Except that I realize, you know, it's the same as all the pre-LORT-movies Arwens, and I'm not that cruel.
But still. Tempting. "Zelda" is too easy.
"absolve" s/b "perform analingus on"
271.1: like half my friends in LA, but nobody currently commenting here as far as I know.
271.2 oh geez. I'd go with Zelda, even though she was a bit of a wilting lilly.
Correct, "Zelda" is too obvious. "Gwaelin" is a cool name, though.
And for a boy, "Magidrakee".
274: pre-LORT-movies
I should just give up correcting my own typos in subsequent comments, and start posting under'WORDS WORDS LOL'.
Further pathetic videogame nerdery: I actually really like the name 'Rinoa', and am slightly aggreived that some Japanese dude working for Square had to come up with it first.
Ouch. Cruelly pwned.
I admit there's not a whole lot of options. Trillian?
Dear god, and just a little while ago there were people objecting to "Kermit."
There are plenty of Katamari Damacy characters to name kids after, too. "Kuro"..."Opeo"..."Lalala"..."Beyond"..."Afro-mania"..."Loud Momma"...
I'm not actually insane enough to ever inflict any of these on my hypothetical children, I should point out. Probably the farthest I'd go would be Maxwell, which has dual utility but would probably be assumed to be yet another "Mackenzie" variant.
Except that I realize, you know, it's the same as all the pre-LORT-movies Arwens, and I'm not that cruel.
There's a Metroid movie?
Further pathetic videogame nerdery: I actually really like the name 'Rinoa'
Pronounced like "quinoa"?
227 makes a point: [protecting children from humiliation] tends to be hugely overrated by most people.
Has anyone or anyone's child really been made fun of for their name such that the parent thought, "Wish I'd gone with 'Steven'"?
There's a Metroid movie?
John Woo optioned it. Sounds pretty awful, but you never know.
285: This story involves a surname, but I think it illustrates the concern isn't totally unwarranted.
285: there are certainly plenty of people who change their names to be something more normal.
288: For example, Beefo Meaty used to be named Pilot Inspektor Tweety.
Okay, I'm going to bed.
284: Not really, but I don't know IPA so I can't really reproduce it. I think it's basically a really bad romanization of a bad katakana attempt at "Lenore". Which is also pretty cool.
I know a K/ermit (R/oosevelt). but someone email me LR's [redacted] name, because I'm all curious and shit now.
The trailer for the Get Smart movie was paired with Harry Potter, which struck me as a bad idea because the trailer trades pretty heavily on familiarity with Get Smart, obviously little kids have no nostalgia for Get Smart, and I'm not even sure how many parents of young children do. Me, my dad really liked it when he was a kid so I saw it on Nick at Nite.
Oh, yeah, totally, I changed my name to Beefo Meaty Fish so it would be less humiliating.
Since 291 didn't actually leave a name, you can email [Redacta] to me. I read the whole damn thread, after all.
291: good point! Kermit brought down Mossadeq. I totally forgot about that. It's not easy being green and/or the democratically elected leader of an oil-rich nation.
It's pretty easy to figure out. I think 158 gives it away pretty well. (And right about now I'd make a comment on the partial origin of my whole handle as it relates to my full name, but I don't want to give the poor redactors any more work.)
Okay okay, email the above if you want to know.
Ah, I was working off 150. 158 narrows it considerably. Cool! First star I see to-na.
Oh god no. You have no idea how much I was tormented with that song as a kid.
Oh. sorry. I'll go to bed now. 300!, sigh.
299: I can imagine the concept of a star bra weighed heavily on the mind of a certain kind of kid.
289: Beefo Meaty used to be named Pilot Inspektor Tweety
This suprised me. Given 253, I was expecting Sifu Esperanto Tweety (or, noting his mathleticism, Sifu Fortran Tweety).
re: names
I've mentioned before, a childhood friend of mine went to a progressive private school, he had classmates called C/loudberry and L/eofwin, among other things. I suspect the only reason they even lived into adulthood* is that they lived in some bourgeois hippy bubble.
* they had that infuriating type of bad behaviour that comes from being set no boundaries while simultaneously being isolated from all consequences of their behaviour, so, names aside, they were in pretty dire need of a kicking ...
I have some friends who named their kid Hanuman. I'm sure my impression of the name is colored because he's an awesome kid, but, well, now I think it's an awesome name.
I used up the name of a Samoan warrior goddess on my dog, explicitly so I wouldn't be tempted if I had a daughter. It's a really pretty name, and the associated myths are great, but it was too weird to inflict on a kid.
Nathan, have you ever read John Nichols' New Mexico trilogy? Specifically the two volumes beyond The Milagro Beanfield War? (Which I assume everyone here has read, right?).
hmmm I'm beginning to wonder whether Adolf Buonaparte Davies was all that good a choice for my daughter.
New Mexico trilogy
I haven't read any of them. In fact, I'm not sure I've even heard of them, so I think your assumption fails...
C'mon d^2, we know you called her Hermione!
This began as a swimming post, sort of. So this isn't totally off-topic.
At a certain age...you can use darlin' or honey or other terms of endearment
If you live in the South and are employed in the food service industry, you can call everyone darlin'.
I thought The Milagro Beanfield War was kind of overrated; I didn't know there were more books.
and are employed in the food service industry
I'm not sure this is even a necessary condition.
Reading this thread post-reduction, nothing you people say makes any goddamn sense. Of course, that could have been true pre-redaction...
I read it post redaction, and I believe Lunar Rockette's name to be that of the heroine of Great Expectations (or some minor variant therof).
I could be wrong, but I'm certain.
I was thinking of the wife and muse of Aldo Leopold, E~ Luna Leopold, daughter of an old New Mexico family, of Marrano origins. An important person to environmentalists of a certain vintage.
315: I thought that first, but then I came to the conclusion that it's "giant ball of flaming gas* in outer space" + "the French word for 'the' (feminine)". If so, I didn't even know it was a name.
*but even in our world, that's just what it's made from
Wow. That's neat. Presumably the other two triplets were named after the wisecracking waitress from Cheers and the female lead in the Little Rascals.
A while back I met a guy who was originally named "Larry" or something like that. He hated the name and legally changed it to...R/ex.
Okay, then he got married and took his wife's last name. So now he is Re/x Re/d/stone.
Also Adrian, while okay, is hardly the be-all-end-all of male names. That is reserved for names like "Truck" or "Maimonides."
Balthazar.
315, 317, 318: Thanks! I have achieved Lunar illumination.
R/ex Re/d/stone is an awesome name. Surely there is a character in Left Behind or an Ayn Rand novel with that name.
I was thinking comic books. That's a 'millionaire playboy RR' or 'international fashion photographer RR' kind of name.
I believe technically they are all the same genre.
313 - the northern equivalent of "darlin'" being "hon".
At one place around here the woman calls everyone "dear heart". It sounds really strange.
Notoriously, in the rock-hard Yorkshire town of Sheffield, they all call each other "love", including hairy-arsed welders talking to one another[1] in the pub. It got edited out of the film "The Full Monty" apparently because it just sound so fucking weird.
[1]I suppose they work in sunrise industries these days and may have shaved their arses accordingly.
speaking of wingnuts, I did enjoy this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gFGit_tZDqs
It sounds pretty odd to hear men call each other "mate", too, dsquared.
"Big guy" and "champ" are homoerotic in a more manly, celebratory way.
We have a winner in "Balthazar Truck Maimonidies".
In Glasgow the epithet of choice is usually 'ya [anatomical and/or pejorative noun]'.
'Awright Billy, how's it gaun, ya cunt?'
'Shug, ya fat fenian basturt, no seen ye for ages. How's yer ma?'
I was thinking of the wife and muse of Aldo Leopold, E~ Luna Leopold, daughter of an old New Mexico family, of Marrano origins. An important person to environmentalists of a certain vintage.
Interesting. The restaurant from which I took my moniker is in Los Lunas, NM, which is named after that family (hence the masculine pronoun).
I thought The Milagro Beanfield War was kind of overrated.
I guess that depends on what you were looking for. I found it laugh out loud funny.
I didn't have time to check earlier, but it's in the last of the trilogy The Nirvana Blues that we find hordes of people in what seems to be Taos having gone over to Hanuman worship.
It was funny, but I felt it was pretty dated (some parts were just so seventies) and not really a very accurate picture of NM (e.g., the way he keeps using the word "Chicano" as if it's the standard term for NM Hispanics). It's a good book with some memorable characters, to be sure, but I didn't think it really lived up to its reputation.
And yes, Chamisaville is a very lightly fictionalized Taos.
If you want dated, try the other two volumes. They are absolutely 'of their time.' And they're very different stories -- you can read any one completely independent of the others.
Charley:
I am thrilled to hear that they made a book out of the movie. I hope they didnt dumb the book down.
325 is quite true, although occasionally a hairy arsed web 2.0 designer will condescend to call you "Flower".