In this day and age one's opinion should be close at hand yet secured against identity theft. I recommend therefore that you also store the password to your opinions up your ass, and change your password frequently.

Fiber may help.

My opinions are untitled, out of immodesty and to ensure dissension in probate.

Not to the opinions themselves does my question pertain, but to title thereto.

If I had Kotsko's opinions, I'd probably keep the titles in the same place.

If I need an opinion I can't make, I lease it.

Mostly, though, I make them myself and sell the extras at craft fairs. Which are up your ass. So, funny coincidence there!

Is this post nonsense, or some sort of inside joke?

Since Kotsko has not been seen around here recently I fear that not a single person on earth will get it, if the latter.

Kotsko commented less than half an hour ago.

IDP, you're forgetting that Cryptic Ned is travelling away from us at 80% of the speed of light. As far as he can tell, Kotsko commented decades ago.

It's neither nonsense nor an inside joke, Ned. Answer the question like a good boy, now.

IANAL, therefore there are no opinions I need to keep track of.

I also ANAL, which is why I'm qualified to respond to the original question.

Everyone, not only lawyers, is entitled to his opinions, Ned.

But not her opinions, Ben?

I also ANAL

I also hang fruit low.

Thanks for making that explicit, Johnny Applenuts.

Hey, guys -- he's talking obliquely about how everyone has a right to his or her opinion, lightheartedly taking that popular turn of phrase literally in order to make a broader point. It's cultural criticism at its best, but apparently it's wasted on you fuck-bags.

So Adam Kotsko, what the heck is this post asking, and who is supposed to be answering it? It's too cryptic for most of us.

Specifically the phrase "everyone is entitled to their [happy, fm?] opinion".

I'm staging an intervention into the way the vocabulary of law has infiltrated our moral/evaluative vocabulary.

Damnedest thing. I was just about say I keep the titles to my opinions in my fuck-bags.

Yes, yes, every ass enwhitled in its own way. Can't you see we're making butt sex jokes?

18: not to mention the way the language of war has infiltrated the language of language.

Neither butt sex nor fuck-bags are joking matters.

Or the way the language of addiction has infiltrated the language of war that long ago infiltrated the language of language language.

Or, indeed, how the language of filtration has infiltrated our language.

22: a guy walks into a fuck-bag. The opinion maker says "stop, thief!" Guy says "but I'm married!"

Ba-dump-ching!

So opinions are like assholes, every asshole has one?

That's what I believe, anyway.

but Kotsko just told me that he keeps his up my ass, which hardly seems convenient for either of us.

Depends on how much time Kotsko spends up your ass, B-Wo.

24: although it has yet to exfiltrate the filters of law, if one can take LB's office as representative.

Only according to weird homuncular theories to assholes have assholes, JP.

25: Every challenge is an opportunity. "Stop, Thief!": Toward a Phenomenology of Fuck-Bag Humour.

29: Only according to weird homuncular theories to assholes have assholes,

Ah yes, Dennet's Cartesian Asshole.

caco ergo sum

Opinions are like assholes: they're in assholes.

The asshole contains all possible assholes, and is populated exclusively by assholes, sad brown opinions that live out their days filtering through the infinitude of assholes with the vain hope that someday they'll find the opinion they've dreamed, as assholes, of infiltrating.

31: it's the Mandelbrot Ass, you see.

Depends on how much time Kotsko spends up your ass, B-Wo.

Actually it depends on how much time anyone other than Kotsko spends up B-Wo's ass. Kotsko may not need the titles to his opinions often, but presumably he would rather not have them disturbed.

32: Opinions are like turds: as long as they remain inside the assholes and aren't displayed to the public, nobody will be offended.

it's the Mandelbrot Ass, you see.

Not unlike Billy Dee Williams' head.

36: he certainly has a large opinion.

33: it's the Mandelbrot Ass, you see.

Like this?
"Fractal Bottoms rotate into Fractal Knockers in this Scene encapsulating "Fractal Knockers Meet the Golden Bone". ... and that is indeed a quote.

So when Ben changes his mind, does he or does Kotsko apply the enema?

"Fractal Knockers Meet the Golden Bone"

I now have the title of my autobiography.

39: hey, we're not talking about brainwashing.

Seems like someone would need a colon the size of the Grand Canyon to hold the titles of all these opinions.

Well, sure, the colon is an invaluable part of speech.

42: They're out there.

Suddenly everyone was run over by a giant semi-truckcolon.

Many blog commenters feel entitled to their opinions, and worry that if shit-talking in comment threads were to be banned, they would be quite severely impacted.

if shit-talking in comment threads were to be banned, they would be quite severely impacted

Perhaps. But we now know that when ben talks ex recta, we may be hearing the titles of Kotsko's opinions.

Or at least their penumbras and emanations.

Maybe someone can give an opinion on how to interpret "stare decisis et non quieta movere" meaning "stand by decisions and do not move that which is quiet" in this context. Can Scalia just pull an opinion out of Kotsko's ass?

Ooops, referenced the wrong asshole.

... should have been John Roberts. (which you gotta admit, is one helluva porn name.)

Is this post nonsense, or some sort of inside joke?

Cryptic Ned is banned!

You're entitled only to those opinions you can defend with force of arms.

My opinions not only have titles, but the full set of Dublin Core metadata.

I keep them in a XML-based RDF suppository.