Re: Creepy Friday

1

I'll kick things off, even though I don't find this that creepy:

Guns N' Roses:
I used to love her, but I had to kill her
I used to love her, but I had to kill her
I had to put her
Six feet under
And I can still hear her complain


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:38 AM
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Oooh! Or how about the lyrics to Monster Mash! A dead corpse gets up and starts dancing - crreeepy!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:40 AM
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I love you, Heebie.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:40 AM
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In the wind and the rain, darling
You keep walking down when the sun shone through the trees
Nobody, no, no, no, nobody stops me from loving you baby
So young and bold, fourteen years old


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:41 AM
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Hey, did you guys know that "Every Breath You Take" isn't as romantic as it sounds?

On the intentional front, Sugar's "Down To The River" is pretty creepy.

Though nowhere near Monster Mash.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:43 AM
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Unintentionally creepy, people.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:43 AM
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Go, Granny, go, Granny, go, go, go!


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:44 AM
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I'm the Pied Piper of R&B y'all.


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:45 AM
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9

The most unintentionally creepy Guns 'N Roses song lyric (they probably thought it just sounded cool and trenchant), is: Immigrants and faggots / They make no sense to me / They come to our country / And think they'll do as they please. . . . It goes on like that. From "One in a Million."

Another winner is all the lyrics from Extreme's "More Than Words," a pretty-sounding love ballad whose actual message is "if you loved me, bitch, you'd put out."


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:45 AM
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Another winner is all the lyrics from Extreme's "More Than Words," a pretty-sounding love ballad whose actual message is "if you loved me, bitch, you'd put out."

That same actual message is found in some of the most celebrated poetry of the last couple hundred years, you know.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:47 AM
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Polly wants a cracker
I think I should get off her first
I think she wants some water
To put out the blow torch

Isn't me
Have a seed
Let me clip
Dirty wings
Let me take a ride
Cut yourself
Want some help
To please myself?
Got some rope
Have been told
Promise you
Have been true
Let me take a ride
Cut yourself
Want some help
To please myself?

Polly wants a cracker
Maybe she would like some food
She asks to untie her
A chase would be nice for a few

[chorus]

Polly says her back hurts
She's just as bored as me
She caught me off my guard
It amazes me the will of the instinct


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:47 AM
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12

"Mellow Yellow", Donovan:

I'm just mad about Fourteen
Fourteen's mad about me
I'm just mad about Fourteen
She's just mad about me

The live recording is very clearly "fourteen-year-old-girls".


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:47 AM
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a pretty-sounding love ballad whose actual message is "if you loved me, bitch, you'd put out."

I've told my students this basically sums up Renaissance poetry.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:47 AM
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14

I might've been born plain white trash, but Fancy was my name


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:47 AM
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15

I will be your father figure (Oh baby)
Put your tiny hand in mine (I'd love to)
I will be your preacher teacher (Be your daddy)
Anything you have in mind (It would make me)
I will be your father figure (Very happy)
I have had enough of crime (Please let me)
I will be the one who loves you
'Til the end of time


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:47 AM
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I love you too, AWB! And I miss your blog. Feel guilty.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:48 AM
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10: Sure. The thread topic isn't "unintentionally creepy poems," though.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:48 AM
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I love the song in 14.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:49 AM
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15 is great.

"Vehicle" is in the same vein: Hey, well I'm the friendly stranger in the black sedan / Oh won't you hop inside my car / I got pictures, got candy, I am a lovable man / I'd like to take you to the nearest star. Shirley Bassey does a great version of that song.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:50 AM
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"Your Butt Is Mine."

-Michael Jackson, Bad


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:51 AM
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Butterfly Kisses, of course!:

Sweet 16 today
She's looking like her mama a little more everyday
One part woman, the other part girl.
To perfume and make-up from ribbons and curls
Trying her wings out in a great big world.

But I remember
Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer; sticking
little white flowers all up in her hair.
"You know how much I love you, Daddy, But if you
don't mind I'm only gonna kiss you on the cheek this time."
With all that I've done wrong I must have done
something right to deserve her love every morning
and butterfly kisses at night.


Posted by: Magpie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:51 AM
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Tim McGraw, "Butterfly Kisses":

There's two things I know for sure
She was sent here from heaven and she's Daddy's little girl
As I drop to my knees by her bed at night
She talks to Jesus and I close my eyes
And I thank God for all of the joy in my life
Oh, but most of all for..

Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk beside the pony Daddy, it's my first ride
I know the cake looks funny Daddy but I sure tried"
Oh, with all that I've done wrong, I must have done something right
To deserve a hug every morning and butterfly kisses at night

Sweet sixteen today
And she's lookin' like her mamma a little more every day
One part woman, the other part girl
To perfume and make-up, from ribbons and curls
Trying her wings out in a great big world
But I remember...

Butterfly kisses after bedtime prayer
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair
You know how much I love you Daddy
But if you don't mind I'm only gonna kiss you on the cheek this time
Oh, with all that I've done wrong, I must have done something right
To deserve her love every morning and butterfly kisses at night

Oh the precious times
Oh, like the wind the years go by
Precious butterfly
Spread your wings and fly

She'll change her name today
and she'll make a promise and I'll give her away
Standing in the bride room just staring at her
She asked me what I'm thinking and I said "I'm not sure,
I just feel like I'm losing my baby girl"
And she leaned over...and gave me...

Butterfly kisses with her mamma there
Stickin' little white flowers all up in her hair
"Walk me down the aisle Daddy, it's just about time
Does my wedding gown look pretty Daddy? Daddy don't cry"
Oh, with all that I've done wrong, I must have done something right
To deserve her love every morning and butterfly kisses

I couldn't ask God for more
Man, this is what love is
I know I've gotta let her go, but I'll always remember
Every hug in the morning and butterfly kisses


Posted by: alif sikkiin | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:52 AM
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13 so so pwned.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:53 AM
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24

From the Santa Claus Is Coming to Town Christmas special that's on every year:

"A Kiss a Toy"
Oh, what a good girl
Oh, what a good boy
Oh what a big smile
All because of a toy!

If you sit on my lap today
A kiss a toy is the price you'll pay
When you tell what you wish for --
In a whisper
Be prepared to pay.

If you sit on my lap today
A kiss a toy is the price you'll pay
When you sit on my left knee
Don't be stingy
Be prepared to pay.

If whenever you take
You give a little back
Then whoever you love
Will give a little love back
So give a little love
Get a little love back
Don't you have a little love
That you want to get back

If you sit on his lap today
A kiss a toy is the price you'll pay
When you sit on his left knee
Don't be stingy
Be prepared to pay.

Now if you sit on my lap today
A kiss a toy is the price you'll pay!


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:53 AM
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25

For songs that totally conflate father and boyfriend, a la 15, how bout Waylon Jennings:

Cause ever since you were a little bitty teeny girl
You said I was the only man in this whole world
Now you bettter do some thinking then you'll find
You got the only daddy that'll walk the line


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:54 AM
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26

All of the car crash songs and doomed-love suicide songs -- Teen Angel, Tell Laura I Love Her, Patches, and others I've forgotten.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:54 AM
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27

Oh, wait, this is the ephebophilia room. I guess the necrophilia room is down the hall. Sorry, ephebophiles!


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:56 AM
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26: Leader of the Pack; Last Kiss.


Posted by: alif sikkiin | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:56 AM
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I see so many little boys I want to marry
I see plenty little kids I've yet to have


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:57 AM
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30

"Foxey Lady" has always creeped me out: "I won't do you no harm." Like, who's bringing this "harm" thing up, creepo?


Posted by: Anderson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 11:58 AM
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The song "Let me love you down" amped up it's creepiness when it was remade by a young girl, who switched all the pronouns.

Sung by a young boy:
All of your friends think I'm just too young for you.
I just tell them I can do what guys their age can do.

not bad. Sung by a young girl:
All of your friends think I'm just too young for you.
I just tell them I can do what girls their age can do.

and all of a sudden: ta-da! creepy!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:01 PM
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You could feel like a baby again sitting on your daddy's knee...
Oh how happy you could be
If you belonged to me.

Especially creepy because sung by Bob Dylan, sounding old enough to be by my grandmother's daddy.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:01 PM
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33

i had some 40z on my mind when i woke up this mornin'
i was sick of fancy drinks from the bitches i'd been bonin'
wanted to get trashed, lay down and drink my stash
get up and make a quick dash then bat my fuckin' eyelash
at the big nasty bottle of the shit i drink
you may call me a ghetto freak but i won't even blink
don't even try to contain the 40z that i drain
i leave a malt liquor stain like a fucking freight train

i go to the high school, i go to the high school
to find me a bitch, a young virgin switch
i go to the high school, i go to the high school
i find a young gun, i drench him in cum
i go to the high school, i go to the high school
make him kiss my gash, then i fuck his tight ass
i go to the high school, i go to the high school
if you make your momma cry i'll give you some of my st. ide's

sippin' on some 40z Like i learned in third grade
for me the drink was made and i won't ever trade
the taste of sweet malted sex on my pussy lovin' tongue
first time i drank it it stung and then some little bells rung
and i knew that i loved you, i knew that i loved you
put nobody above you, rather sip you then get screwed
i knew you were somethin', had my little brain bumpin'
'stead of doin' my man last night, it was you that i was humpin'

i go to the high school, i go to the high school
i find me a bitch, a young virgin switch
i go to the high school, i go to the high school
i find a young gun, i drench him in cum
i go to the high school, i go to the high school
make him kiss my gash, then i fuck his tight ass
i go to the high school, i go to the high school
if you make your momma cry i'll give you some of my st. ide's

Not only does she promise to violate teens of both sexes, but she prefers her St. Ide's!

Okay, maybe this is intentionally creepy. It has served as unintentionally creepy for me when I find myself singing along to it at parties where I'd been innocently flirting with someone before. It'll put a damper on things.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:01 PM
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34

24 is out-of-the-park unintentionally creepy. But "Butterfly Kisses" is, I think, perfect creepy -- it's a private, confessional song about an emotion that's difficult to express. It's exactly because it only requires a little push on lines like "As I drop to my knees by her bed at night" and "I'm only gonna kiss you on the cheek this time" to make it supercreepy that the song is poignant. The daughter is growing up, and part of her individuation makes it awkward to love daddy with abandon.

I mean, I know it's easy to joke about purity balls, etc. but I think the song is conscious about those elements, and that gives it some emotional weight.

My favorite country lyric has always been "It won't be long before my ship comes in / gonna sail right out of Colorado", but that's not really on point.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:02 PM
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Gr, close tags later!


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:02 PM
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36

Oooh! Remember that song from the Resevoir Dogs soundtrack! "I Gotcha"? It was basically about a girl who'd changed her mind and he was forcing himself on her anyway.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:02 PM
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37

foreigner, love has taken its toll.

i felt physically ill the first time i heard it. ill, and so deeply depressed about humanity.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:02 PM
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38

"Someday" by The Strokes:

Oh my ex says I'm lacking in depth
I will do my best

Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:04 PM
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39

Ooo, 37's just downright rape-o-licious.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:04 PM
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40

And remember that Brown Sugar thread?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:05 PM
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This is perhaps creepy in the earnestness of its desire to avoid creepiness (catchy song, though).

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run girl
You're much too young girl

With all the charms of a woman
You've kept the secret of your youth
You led me to believe you're old enough
To give me love
And now it hurts to know the truth

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run girl
You're much too young girl

Beneath your perfume and your make-up
You're just a baby in disguise
And though you know that it's wrong to be
Alone with me
That come on look is in your eyes

Young girl, get out my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run girl
You're much too young girl

So hurry home to your mama
I'm sure she wonders where you are
Get out of here
Before I have the time
To change my mind
Cuz I'm afraid we'll go too far

Young girl, get out my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run girl
You're much too young girl


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:05 PM
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My favorite country lyric has always been "It won't be long before my ship comes in / gonna sail right out of Colorado", but that's not really on point.

Made me snicker, though.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:06 PM
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43

The entire White Album became unintentionally creepy to me after I read Helter Skelter.


Posted by: alif sikkiin | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:06 PM
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44

Anything from Weezer's Pinkerton, particularly "Across the Sea."


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:07 PM
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45

Winger, "She's Only Seventeen": Daddy says she's too young / But she's old enough for me...

Eighties metal is a creepy goldmine.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:07 PM
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You better run for your life if you can, little girl
Hide your head in the sand, little girl
If I catch you with another man, that's the end
Little girl.

Okay, maybe that one's intentionally creepy.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:08 PM
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47

44: Agreed.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:08 PM
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48

Most of these are intentional.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:08 PM
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49

I do love Jonathan Richman, and this is a very pretty song, and it sucks when you learn he wrote it (like pretty much all of his other romantic songs for most of his life) for a woman he loved since the seventies, eventually married, and who then left him, leading to the ongoing "Jonathan Richman and his Painful Divorce" period of his career, but these lyrics are definitely high on the unintentionally creepy meter:

If you didn't want me you shouldn't have been born
That started all the trouble now the damage been done
You never should have been born
'Cause now you're the one for me

And if you didn't want me to follow you around
You never should have showed up around my town
You never should have come to town
'Cause now you're the one for me

And it's too late, 'cause now you're stuck with me
Better give up, it's me you choose
I Say "Ha ha ha ha, it's me, you lose."
It's to late, 'cause now my minds is set
You better give up because I won't forget

It goes on like that.


Posted by: JL | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:09 PM
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50

The original video makes 41 definitely creepy. Almost as creepy as seeing the same guy perform the song at EPCOT.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:09 PM
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I've got "Jesse's Girl" on my iPod gym mix. I love the gritted teeth repressed homoeroticism of it. You know he so wants to be Jesse's girl.

Jessie's got himself a girl and I want to make her mine
And she's watching him with those eyes
And she's lovin' him with that body, I just know it
Yeah 'n' he's holding her in his arms late, late at night
You know, I wish that I had Jessie's girl ...
I play along with the charade, there doesn't seem to be a reason to change
You know, I feel so dirty when they start talking cute
I wanna tell her that I love her, but the point is rather moot


Posted by: Becks | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:10 PM
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Yeah, I got nothing. All the music I listen to is deliberately creepy.


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:10 PM
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We've got a lot of different categories at work here. Some of these are intentionally creepy, which is right out. Some of these are creepy because the song seems to endorse something which we good people think is wrong (beating up gays and immigrants, raping slaves).

But Butterfly Kisses is in its own class because it is trying to express something that we all agree is good (paternal love) while winding up sounding like something we all agree is bad (father daughter incest.)


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:11 PM
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I love T-Pain because he manages to stand out from the already creepy genre of rap music:

I can see it in your eyes, baby
I took you by surprise, baby

But baby girl I ain't trying to get you drunk
I'm just trying to get you tipsy enough
Cuz I know that you wouldn't do what you do
Unless you get tipsy enough


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:12 PM
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I love 50. Why do all these homosexuals keep sucking my cock?


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:12 PM
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56

I find Christian rock creepy.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:14 PM
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Any song with "moot" in the lyrics is disqualified. For a lot of things.

For funny but slightly creepy lyrics, consider Lemmy:

Lay down, turn around
Here come the sister gonna strip you down
Shut up, breathe in
Lets have the address of your next of kin
Chin up, shoulders back
You've got a body like a Marshall stack
Keep still, take your pill
Or I'm gonna make you really ill.
Next please, next please
Try to separate those cowardly knees
X-ray, you've gotta pay
The only chance you've ever got of getting away
Here we are,
What's that scar?
I don't like anything I've seen so far
Pay me, pay me
I ain't no doctor of philosophy
.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:14 PM
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slightly creepy?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:16 PM
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PhDs definitely should be paid. What a horrible song.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:17 PM
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Intentionally creepy, candidate for most successful song ever explicitly about rape: I Gotcha.

Unintentionally creepy: lots of sub-Beatles sweet-sounding stuff by Crowded House reads like evil stalker/wife beater stuff. Like Locked Out:

I been locked out
I been locked in
But I always seem to come back again
When youre in that room
What do you do
I know that I will have you in the end
And the clouds they are crying on you
And the birds are offering up their tunes
In a shack thats as remote as a mansion
You escape into a place where nothing moves
And I been locked out
And I know were through
But I cant begin to face up to the truth
And I wait so long for the walls to crack
But I know that Ill one day have you back
And the hills are as soft as a pillow
And they cast a shadow on my bed
And the view when I look through my window
Is an alterpiece Im praying to for the
Living and the dead
Twin valleys shine in the morning sun
I sent the message out to my only one I been locked out and I know were through
But I cant begin to face up to the truth
I wait so long for the walls to crack
But I know that Ill one day have you back
And I work with the bees and the honey
And every night I circle like a moon
And its an act of simple devotion
But it can take forever
When youve got something to prove
I been locked out



Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:17 PM
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Butterfly Kisses is in its own class

Kate Bush's "The Infant Kiss" is the same thin in reverse.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:17 PM
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58: Some women might take that "body like a Marshall stack" thing as a compliment. I have never met any such woman.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:18 PM
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#33. "Burger Baby" is even creepier/funnier.

Weepin' like a bitch one night I just couldn't stand it.
Knocked up with a burger baby and I just hadn't planned it.
Called up Smokehouse for cash, they said, "We don't understand it!"
I said "BURGER ABORTION I DON'T ASK IT I DEMAND IT!!!!"

But, yeah, that's intentionally creepy/ludicrous. Unintentionally? Anything by Red Sovine.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:19 PM
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Hey, little girl, is your daddy home?
Did he go and leave you all alone?
I got a bad desire.
I'm on fire.

I always hope that Bruce means "bad" just in the cheating sense, and "daddy" and "little girl" in a non-age-related way, but it creeps me out nevertheless.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:20 PM
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59: Not in Lemmy's world, John.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:21 PM
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I thought of an old musical shown at a Screen on the Green night (the Mall) last year. Fred Astaire is in a very crowded train station getting his shoes shined by the only black guy in the station. Then the two do a dance routine while Astaire is singing about how getting his shoes shined is so great. I think seeing something old that was perfectly ok then, and not at all now, can be unintentionally creepy.


Posted by: terpbball | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:21 PM
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64: The song is both creepier and better when sung by Johnny Cash.

Actually, a lot of songs are like that.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:22 PM
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66: perfectly ok accepted by mainstream whites


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:22 PM
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64 is a good one.


Posted by: alif sikkiin | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:23 PM
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None of them fit this thread, but I was just looking at the lyrics to the songs on the Baron von Tollbooth album. You had to be there, I think.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:23 PM
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Some women might take that "body like a Marshall stack" thing as a compliment

Yeah, rectangular chicks are hott.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:24 PM
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72

I read that as "rectangular chickens" and was all confused.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:25 PM
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"Brick House" never seemed much like a compliment to me either.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:26 PM
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74

"Inno a Satana," Emperor:

O mighty Lord of the Night.
Master of beasts.
Bringer of awe and derision.
Thou whose spirit lieth upon
Every act of oppression, hatred and strife.
Thou whose presence dwelth in every shadow.
Thou who strengthen the power of every quietus.
Thou who sway every plague and storm.
Harkee.
Thou art the Emperor of Darkness.
Thou are the king of howling wolves.
Thou hath the power to force any light in wane.
Sans mercy.
Sans compassion nor will to answer whosever asketh the why.
Thy path is capricious but yet so wide.
With no such thing as an impediment to strong.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:26 PM
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And she's lovin' him with that body, I just know it
Yeah 'n' he's holding her in his arms late, late at night

Did Ogged's friend write that?


Posted by: Steve H. | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:28 PM
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66 Very true about Johnny Cash.


Posted by: terpbball | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:29 PM
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How about the category "Trying to be creepy but hilariously un-creepy?"

I nominate:
Sleep with one eye open
Clutching your pillow tight
Exit light, enter night
Take my hand...Off to never-never land!

Hold me, I'm trembly.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:30 PM
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73: Probably "Brick Shithouse" doesn't seem like a compliment to me either. That's the form I hear most often.

Prissy bitch.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:30 PM
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#74. 17 year olds saying "harkee" aren't creepy.

Anything by Gary Glitter? Creepy.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:32 PM
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I mean, "to you". To me it's a fantastic compliment.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:32 PM
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Brick Shithouse.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:32 PM
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79: Those are Norwegian 17-year-olds, pal. Didn't the drummer kill a guy a couple of years later?


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:33 PM
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That looks like a guy shithouse to me. Not a babe shithouse.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:33 PM
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Some of the later verses of "America the Beautiful" creep me out:

America! America!
May God thy gold refine
Till all success be nobleness
And every gain divine!

and

O beautiful for patriot dream
That sees beyond the years
Thine alabaster cities gleam
Undimmed by human tears!

and

America! America!
God shed his grace on thee
Till nobler men keep once again
Thy whiter jubilee!

But I guess that's a different kind of creepiness.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:34 PM
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People get ready
There's a train a'comin
Don't need no ticket
You just get on board.


Always sounded very Auschwitz to me.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:38 PM
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In the same vein of 84, "God Bless America."


Posted by: hermit greg | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:39 PM
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85: No!! It's totally uncreepy. Freedom train, promised land, all that.

The Housemartins version is very groovy.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:40 PM
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Tom Jones' "She's a lady" makes any list of creepy songs:

"Well she knows what I'm about
She can take what I dish out, and that's not easy
Well she knows me through and through
She knows just what to do, and how to please me."


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:40 PM
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84: I didn't know about the "whiter jubilee" verse. What the hell does that mean?


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:41 PM
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Also a fun thread would be "Song lyrics that bug the hell out of you."


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:41 PM
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Threadjack! I'm sick of Think Progress's misleading headlines and toxic comment section, but I like, for the most part, the set of news items they do draw attention to. Today, however, they ran an item about Jean Schmidt plagiarizing some text for a column that was basically a PSA about how kids can not get run over by a school bus, which just pushed me over the edge.

Can anyone recommend a political news blog with a slightly less biased view but a similar focus?


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:42 PM
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I know it's supposed to be all Freedom Train-y, but that's why it's unintentional. When I was little, and my parent were always groovin on that song, I assumed it was about dying. Sort of a cheered-up version of the grim reaper where he is a rain conducter and you hop on the train to heave without the burden of your bags. Then I got older and learned about concentration camps, and that valence substituted.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:42 PM
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Keith Whitley: "You say it best when you say nothing at all."

Shut up, woman.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:43 PM
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The Housemartins

have a whole bunch of songs with bouncy, incredibly cheerful music but really bitter, if not creepy, lyrics. That's intentional, though.

Also, that Strokes lyric strikes me as cheerful loserish rather than creepy, as in the Housemartins' "We're Not Deep."


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:43 PM
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Also, from parenting-a-toddler perspective, Ring around the Rosie is *totally* creepy.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:45 PM
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92: Yeah, I can see that. That tangentially suggests a another new thread: Song lyrics you misheard when you were a kid. (I wouldn't be surprised if that's one that's already happened.)


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:45 PM
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92: It is about dying, right? About the afterlife, salvation for the believers, and all of that.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:46 PM
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95: God, I know! It's like someone making up a children's song and dance about AIDS or ebola. Sick.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:47 PM
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I mean, if you count gospel songs about the comfort of the afterlife as creepy, then you just labeled a big chunk of Americana creepy.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:47 PM
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I'll also nominate every invitation hymn ever written.


Posted by: hermit greg | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:48 PM
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I think it is, basically, about dying and the afterlife, but is supposed to be decidedly optimistic than the way I read it as a kid. I was all, 'I could not stop for death so he kindly stopped for me' about it.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:48 PM
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91: I hope not. What a stupid complaint.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:49 PM
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There's a better home awaiting, in the sky, lord, in the sky.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:49 PM
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97: Yeah, though I think in the way that a lot of civil rights and slave songs use death and freedom somewhat interchangeably. You'll get to one Promised Land or another. Or at least that's the way I've always heard it.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:49 PM
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98: It's not, actually, about the bubonic plague; it predates the outbreak. But it's still fucking creepy, lyrically.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:49 PM
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90:

Goodbye to you, my trusted friend.
We've known each other since we're nine or ten.
Together we climbed hills or trees.
Learned of love and ABC's,
skinned our hearts and skinned our knees.
Goodbye my friend, it's hard to die,
when all the birds are singing in the sky,
Now that the spring is in the air.
Pretty girls are everywhere.
When you see them I'll be there.
We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun.
But the hills that we climbed
were just seasons out of time.
Goodbye, Papa, please pray for me,
I was the black sheep of the family.
You tried to teach me right from wrong.
Too much wine and too much song,
wonder how I get along.
Goodbye, Papa, it's hard to die
when all the birds are singing in the sky,
Now that the spring is in the air.
Little children everywhere.
When you see them I'll be there.
We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun.
But the wine and the song,
like the seasons, all have gone.
Goodbye, Michelle, my little one.
You gave me love and helped me find the sun.
And every time that I was down
you would always come around
and get my feet back on the ground.
Goodbye, Michelle, it's hard to die
when all the bird are singing in the sky,
Now that the spring is in the air.
With the flowers ev'rywhere.
I whish that we could both be there.
We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun.
But the stars we could reach
were just starfishs on the beach


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:50 PM
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"Whiter jubilee" is a Book of Revelation reference.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:50 PM
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Also, the various pwnage comments above.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:51 PM
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Mister Bluebird's on my shoulder
It's the truth, it's actual
Ev'rything is satisfactual
Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay
Wonderful feeling, feeling this way


Posted by: Ugh | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:51 PM
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105: Another cherished myth busted. Any idea what it does mean?


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:52 PM
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For creepy, I was going to say Johnny Cash's version of "Delia's Gone", but then I remembered Louisiana Red's "Sweetblood Call":

I have a hard time missing you baby, with my pistol in your mouth
Mmmm have a hard time missing you baby, with my pistol in your mouth
You may be thinking 'bout going north, but your brains are staying south

Just roll your pretty eyes, if you intend to stay
Just roll your pretty eyes, if you intend to stay
Close 'em up again, and I blow your world away

I see your eyes are rollin'
Must mean your love for me has come back
Must mean you're satisfied again
With our little wooden country shack
I have a hard time missing you baby, with my pistol in your mouth
You may be thinking about going north woman, but your brains are staying south

Even if you sneak away
I'll find you before nightfall
You're tied to me girl
I can feel your sweetblood call
Even if you sneak away
I'll find you before nightfall
Caused you are tied to me girl
I can feel your sweetblood call

That's beyond creepy, for me.


Posted by: Roamsedge | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:53 PM
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I always found "Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Daughter" to be the creepiest song when I was a kid, but the guy's voice is what really puts it over the top.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:53 PM
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Has anyone posted "Carolyn" by Merle Haggard? Depends on what you mean by "creepy", I suppose, but it will stop a room cold:

Carolyn let me tell you what I heard about a man today
He didn't come home from work and he went away
'Til he came to a city, bright in the nightime like day
There they say he met with some women dressed in yellow and scarlet
Their warm lips like a honeycomb, dripped with honey
And somethin' about the smell of strange perfume
Made him feel warm, and not alone

Yes Carolyn a man will do that sometimes on his own
And sometimes when he's lonely
And I believe a man will do that sometimes out of spite
But Carolyn, a man will do that always
When he's treated bad at home

Yes Carolyn a man will do that sometimes on his own
And sometimes when he's lonely
And I believe a man will do that sometimes out of spite
But Carolyn, a man will do that always
When he's treated bad at home


I don't think you can call that "unintentional", although I don't think he meant it to be creepy, just, you-know, truth-tellin'.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:53 PM
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107: Or so says Metafilter, and if it's on the internet, it can't be wrong.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:54 PM
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Bright College years, with pleasure rife,
The shortest, gladdest years of life;
How swiftly are ye gliding by!
Oh, why doth time so quickly fly?

The seasons come, the seasons go,
The earth is green or white with snow,
But time and change shall naught avail
To break the friendships formed at Yale.

In after years, should troubles rise
To cloud the blue of sunny skies,
How bright will seem, through mem'ry's haze
Those happy, golden, bygone days!

Oh, let us strive that ever we
May let these words our watch-cry be,
Where'er upon life's sea we sail:
"For God, for Country and for Yale!"

Especially creepy when you have three papers overdue and exams about to start, and your main "friendship formed at Yale" just dumped you. The a capellas cruising the dining hall remind you once again: No matter how shitty your life seems today, it's going to get so much much worse after you graduate . . .


Posted by: unimaginativeguywhocantthinkofawittycybernym | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:54 PM
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64- I'm afraid your hope is too optimistic.
Tell me now baby is he good to you
Can he do to you the things that I do
I can take you higher
I'm on fire

And:
At night I wake up with the sheets soaking wet
And a freight train running through the
Middle of my head
Only you can cool my desire
I'm on fire

Sheets soaking wet? Oh dear.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:54 PM
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105: It's not, actually, about the bubonic plague; it predates the outbreak

Really? Older than 1345? Wow, that's impressive.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:55 PM
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110: I'm not sure what it really means, although I do know there are multiple 15th and 16th cent. versions with slightly different lyrics, many not about ashes or falling down.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:55 PM
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Snopes on Ring Around the Rosie


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:55 PM
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Yeah, though I think in the way that a lot of civil rights and slave songs use death and freedom somewhat interchangeably. You'll get to one Promised Land or another.

The book I just read about the antebellum South talked a bit about how slave religion focused on Christian themes of redemption after death semi-deliberately to give preachers plausible deniability about whether they were encouraging slaves to flee/revolt. It was definitely less upsetting for whites than all the stuff about Moses.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:55 PM
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No votes yet for "Girl, You'll Be a Woman Soon"?


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:57 PM
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116: no, I think Sir Krauub's got it. "Daddy" means "daddy" (wink wink), not daddy. "Little girl" is just playing off that. A "bad desire" is the cheatin' kind.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:57 PM
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116: But that could still be just about desire and cheating, "little girl" being used like "baby" or those other infantalizing terms for women. Right?


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:58 PM
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117: It doesn't pre-date it, it was post-dates it, to the point of unlikely correlation. I overly quickly mistyped that. And wasn't there a plague outbreak even earlier than the 14th cent one?


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:58 PM
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122: Whew.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:59 PM
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Damn. Seasons in the Sun was written by Jacques Brel. Terry Jacks is Canadian and perhaps bilingual (Rod McKuen translated the lyrics, though).

So do I reclessify Brel, or reclassify the song? In a top 40 rock n roll context it sounds horrible.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 12:59 PM
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The most godawful wedding song I have ever heard (and I have heard it at too many weddings). From a little number called "The Wedding Song":

A man shall leave his mother and a woman leave her home.
And they shall travel on to where the two shall be as one.
As it was in the beginning is now and till the end.
Woman draws her life from man and gives it back again.
And there is love. There is love.


Posted by: Invisible Adjunct | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:00 PM
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Snopes disables cutting and pasting, but they've got a good explanation there based on circle dances as a way to get around dancing bans.

Also, no written versions of ring around the rosie until 1881. Plenty of versions from that time though just look like they are about dancing in a circle.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:01 PM
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124: Possibly, some peoplke reckon "Justinian's plague" was that. But it was endemic in Europe after the 14th century. There were minor outbreaks every 2 or 3 years, and major ones occasionally. 1665 just happened to be a particularly bad outbreak in London.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:01 PM
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126: Everything sounds better in French.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:02 PM
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Terry received permission, but not credit, for changing part of "Seasons in the Sun." He rewrote the last verse and rearranged the words and chords in the chorus in order to "lighten up" the song.

Relax, John.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:03 PM
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The book I just read about the antebellum South

How was it teo? I'm always on the prowl for good history books.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:04 PM
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Everything sounds better in French.

Hmm. French sounds silly to me. Like if you woke them up in the middle of the night, they wouldn't actually talk like that.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:06 PM
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How was it teo? I'm always on the prowl for good history books.

Judah benjamen's biography is very interesting if you've never heard of him. Amazing guy.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:09 PM
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they wouldn't actually talk like that

That's how I feel when I hear little kids speaking French. Even on, you know, a plane heading to France. At first listen, it sounds totally precocious.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:10 PM
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Black Box Recorder's "Seasons in the Sun" is pretty good.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:10 PM
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Judah benjamen's biography is very interesting

Thanks, will. I'll check it out.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:13 PM
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Everything sounds better in French.

French is such a beautiful language. However, I'm still kicking myself for studying French instead of the much more practical Spanish.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:13 PM
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they wouldn't actually talk like that

So if you went to (at random) Nairobi, and there were all these people wandering around talking Gikuyu, it would phase you?


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:14 PM
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Will, there are still areas where English speakers can get landscaping and dishwashing jobs.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:15 PM
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Flippanter: you HAVE to read this book!

A teaser:

A rare Sephardic Jew in the Old South and a favorite of Jefferson Davis, Judah P. Benjamin has been described as "the brains of the Confederacy." He held three successive Confederate cabinet posts--attorney general, secretary of war, and secretary of state--and was Davis's closest confidant in the government. But some have questioned Benjamin's loyalty to Davis and the extent of his influence. More than 140 years after Benjamin first appeared on the Confederate scene, historians still debate his place in the history of the Lost Cause. Originally published back in 1943 and now available for the first time in paperback, Robert Douthat Meade's JUDAH P. BENJAMIN, CONFEDERATE STATESMAN provides an absorbing account of the life of this enigmatic Civil War figure.

Meade chronicles Benjamin's birth in the Virgin Islands; his rise to power as a lawyer and politician in south Louisiana; his election to the U.S. Senate in the 1850s; his outspoken role in the secession controversy; his friendship with Davis; his prominent role in the Confederate government; his daring escape after Appomattox; and his brilliant second law career in England after the war. Still the definitive study of Benjamin after nearly sixty years, Meade's authoritative work is a classic of Civil War biography.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:16 PM
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Judah P. Benjamin has been described as "the brains of the Confederacy."

Call the stereotype police! I bet he had a big nose too.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:18 PM
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will--The Romance languages I know are French and Italian. Ha! I should have spent the summer I spent in Itally perfecting my German. Then I might have been eligible for help getting a job there.

I kept telling myself that French or Italian and German were the languages of scholarship in my field, but since I never did graduate work in Classics, that rationale is totally bogus.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:21 PM
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You know he so wants to be Jesse's girl.

That's how we sang it in elementary school: "I wish that I *was* Jesse's girl," making fun of pretty-boy Rick.

Another creepy one to me is the Beatles, "You'll never leave me and you know it's true / Because you like me too much, and I like you." I imagine that being sung by some John-Fowles-The-Collector type sicko.


Posted by: Anderson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:22 PM
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Snopes disables cutting and pasting

When sites do that, usually disabling javascript and refreshing the page will let you do what you want. Just don't forget to turn it back on.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:23 PM
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To be fair, anything would sound creepy if sung by that guy in The Collector.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:24 PM
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139: No, I mean that French sounds to me like a pretend affected Monty Python language, in a way that, say, Spanish, Russian, and Arabic don't.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:25 PM
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I once shared a house with a couple that had broken up, but were still living together. In fact, they each invited their new lovers to come live with us, which they did. Michelle's new boyfriend was named Jesse. Michelle's ex boyfriend found an old 45 of Jesse's girl, and would play it really loudly and sing along.

Those were weird times.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:28 PM
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Creepy in a different way: Bryan Adams, Run to You


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:29 PM
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I shamefacedly admit that I love Jesse's Girl.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:30 PM
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This song always seemed pervy to me:

Hey there Little Red Riding Hood,


You sure are looking good,


You're everything that a big bad wolf could want.

And then it went on about taking Little Riding Hood into the forest and showing her something neat. I've forgotten the lyrics exactly, but I do remember that sometime around 16, the song very suddenly went from giggly-sexy to ew.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:32 PM
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I non-shamefacedly admit that I love "Jesse's Girl". Fly your freak flag, SCMT!


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:33 PM
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French sounds to me like a pretend affected Monty Python language

Even when it's being spoken by Melissa Theuriau?


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:34 PM
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This is an utter cliche, but I do remember the moment of revelation about 'Under my Thumb' where I was suddenly all, 'ew.'

I also remember hearing a few years ago that that Filter song 'Take a Picture' is about the dude shooting up in an airplane bathroom and vomiting all over himself before passing out, then waking up to a flight attendant taking pictures of him slumped over the toilet. Which ruins the song, which itself isn't that great to begin with.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:35 PM
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Hm. The formatting up there didn't look quite how I intended. Anyway, here are those "Little Red Riding Hood" lyrics. They might be intentionally creepy---but I think in a way that used to be considered funny.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:35 PM
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141: Why me? I'm not inordinately enamoured of the history of the Confederacy.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:37 PM
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154--I did that incredibly recently with that Beatles song "you better run as fast as you can little girl." As a kid, I remember we used it as chase music.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:37 PM
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Come together right now over me

The Beatles: into bukkake before it was cool.


Posted by: Cain | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:39 PM
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I non-shamefacedly admit that I love "Jesse's Girl". Fly your freak flag, SCMT!

Woo-hoo!


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:41 PM
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We sang "I wish that I were Jesse's Girl".

Too few songs use the subjunctive.

Related: I rue the day I realized that "None of Us Are Free" by Solomon Burke is the same grammatical error over and over and over.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:42 PM
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157: Catch you with another man, that's the end, little girl.

Ahhh! Who knows how long it would've taken me to have that moment on my own. Sigh.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:44 PM
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160: What if God Was One of Us sort of makes me want to kill myself.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:45 PM
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"Black No. 1" by Type O Negative:

Loving you was like loving the dead...

Really? How was gym class today, 14-year-old goth girl who happens to be a 6'8" metal freak?


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:47 PM
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On Jessie's Girl -- these lyrics struck me as so awful so as to maybe make it all the way back around to good.

I've been funny,
I've been cool with the lines
Ain't that the way
love is supposed to be


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:48 PM
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Too few songs use the subjunctive.

But, delightfully, there's Three Dog Night:

If I were the king of the world
I tell you what I'd do
I'd throw away the cars and the bars and the war
And make sweet love to you.

Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:48 PM
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I am presently listening to "If you leave" and wondering if Ringwald's career implosion means I now have a shot.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:48 PM
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"Jessie's Girl" is a great song. Video.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:49 PM
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166: Make her a mix tape and find out.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:49 PM
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I mean that French sounds to me like a pretend affected Monty Python language

That is a good thing, right????

Flippanter: I was kidding about you hating recommendations such as that.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:52 PM
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Molly Ringwald upon meeting SCMT. Interpret as you will.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:53 PM
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Bostoniangirl:

Screw the classics! Those are great languages for wine and eating.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:54 PM
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The coffeehouse I'm in is playing Linda Ronstadt's version of "Tracks of My Tears." I like her, but c'mon. No one can cover Smokey.

(Anyone remember that commercial for some K-Tel type record, where the dad tells the kid to turn off the music and the kid says, "But Dad, it's Smokey!" That's a damn classic.)


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:55 PM
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Ahh, most creep in lyrics is entirely intentional. Lyricists are usually a pretty reflective sort, and rock should be transgressive. Most of my stuff is 30+ years old and obscure.

"Kill me with your love
Kill me with your love
Kill me with your love
she said."
...repeat and build for ten minutes Jericho,1972

West Coast Pop Art Experimental Band had an entire 4th album thematically centered on runaways, Where's My Daddy I think Markley did time.

Mad River, Ghost, Coven, various Italian groups I wouldn't know where to start.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:56 PM
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Are we in the same coffeehouse? Holy shit!


Posted by: Counterfly | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:56 PM
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La Tazza Fresca?


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:58 PM
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167: Why did the Eighties rule so much? Ever since I saw the video for that gawddamn Reliant K song, I've been jonesing for some OP-wear.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:58 PM
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That's me! In the green blazer!

God, I wish this would happen someday on Unfogged.


Posted by: Counterfly | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:59 PM
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Damn, I fell for that.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 1:59 PM
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You're not actually in same place, are you?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:00 PM
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It's funny, misogyny and male domination in rock n roll have always seemed pretty obvious.

170: Winona Ryder is already approaching my 1/2 + 7 threshold, but I figure she has to gain 20 or 30 lbs. and pick up a felony or two before she descends to my level.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:01 PM
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I should have said I was the cute barista with the labrette and the tubetop who was furtively reading Unfogged on her cellphone.


Posted by: Counterfly | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:01 PM
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OT:
Am I crazy for thinking about getting a blackberry?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:01 PM
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Why did the Eighties rule so much?


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:02 PM
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182: Depends on your self-discipline, I think.

I've got a Blackberry-like phone. It tethers me to work in some ways, and I check it too often, but it also means that I don't have to schlep my laptop when I travel, which is a godsend. And it's also great to be able to go online and settle bar bets (and read Unfogged on the road), but you don't need a Blackberry for that.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:04 PM
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Am I crazy for thinking about getting a blackberry?

Yes.

I'm also considering getting one, but they don't make one with all the features I want. People who have blackberries really do become pretty damn annoying, whether they mean to or not.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:04 PM
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Awww, you suckered me.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:04 PM
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180: That joke might have worked better before we found out that you're in your mid-forties, "Old" Man.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:05 PM
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182: No, Brickbreaker is an awesome way to waste time.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:05 PM
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No, Brickbreaker is an awesome way to waste time.
True!

OK, I have really got to get back to work. Ciao, all.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:07 PM
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My phone is dying and my pda is dying. So I think a blackberry is the way to go. But, I am so cheap.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:07 PM
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I'm not sure I could like anyone who dislikes the song Jesse's Girl. Luckily, I'm quite sure no such person exists, though some for various reasons try to delude others and some, sadly, have deluded even themselves.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:08 PM
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190: I'm really going after this. But check out refurbs and earlier versions if you're not a total gadgethead. Also, iPhones now a real bargain at $400!


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:09 PM
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Not only am I 61, but I'm pretty much toothless. Did the Minneapolis meetup people detect that?


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:09 PM
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So I think a blackberry is the way to go.

There are a lot of smartphone options, Will, not just Blackberry.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:10 PM
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You're not fooling anyone, John.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:11 PM
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193: I understood that you came off as "ruthless," but I may have misheard.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:12 PM
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There are a lot of smartphone options, Will, not just Blackberry.

I cannot have a phone with a camera though because courts do not let you take cameras into court.

Thus, no camera is a requirement.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:13 PM
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Well then, Will, you bastard, you should get the one I would love to get, if only it had a camera: the Blackberry 8830 from Sprint.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:18 PM
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Come on. Winona herself is pushing 40.

She has amazing ancestry. David Horowitz is a classic stoner. Her mom is a shamaness or something like that.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:18 PM
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That is what I am looking at but I've got to pay an extra $44.00


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:22 PM
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Because you're special?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:22 PM
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Has this already been mentioned?

Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers

So, in other words, your daughter will be needed for her reproductive organs someday so be nice to her.


Posted by: Liz | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:25 PM
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102: Me stupid for complaining about Think Progress, or TP stupid for complaining about Schmidt?


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:26 PM
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You. Why the fuck would anyone be looking for a less biased site at this point in history? The Republican Party is controlled by con men, grafters, religious fanatics, military adventurists, and bigots.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:30 PM
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I don't see what's creepy about "Jessie's Girl". Except that "Jessie" isn't a man's name and the title should actually be "Jesse's Girl".

"Foxey Lady" has always creeped me out: "I won't do you no harm." Like, who's bringing this "harm" thing up, creepo?

I've gotten that feeling from other songs too. Like in "Baby Got Back".

A word to the thick soul sistas
I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya

Wow, he won't cuss or hit ya! What a catch!


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:33 PM
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" 'I take care of my kids!'? You're supposed to take care of your kids."


Posted by: Counterfly | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:36 PM
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OT: Based on his flickr pictures, mrh seems to be a fabulous cook. I want to eat and learn. Can you cook for a meetup?

And who renamed the flickr group?


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:36 PM
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You forgot "What do you want, a cookie?"


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:37 PM
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There's always intentionally creepy that's so far over-the-top it crosses the threshold into unintentional creepiness. Morrissey "The More You Ignore Me" (particularly the seemingly throwaway line I've made up your mind) pushes that button for some people I know.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:38 PM
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I've always wondered who survived this encounter:

Danger in the shape of somethin' wild
Stranger dressed in black, she's a hungry child
No one knows who she is or what her name is
I don't know where she came from or what her game is

(Hot child in the city)
(Hot child in the city)
(Runnin' wild and lookin' pretty)
(Hot child in the city)

So young to be loose and on her own
Young boys, they all want to take her home
She goes downtown, the boys all stop and stare
When she goes downtown, she walks like she just don't care, care

(Hot child in the city)
(Hot child in the city)
(Runnin' wild and lookin' pretty)
Yeah
(Hot child in the city)

Come on down to my place, baby
We'll talk about love
Come on down to my place, woman
We'll make love!


Posted by: Biohazard | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:39 PM
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I am special. But, that is for unlimited data. In addition to my phone plan.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:39 PM
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Really? Damn, I hadn't looked at the plans yet. That's a lot.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:40 PM
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204: The Republican Party is controlled by con men, grafters, religious fanatics, military adventurists, and bigots.

Um, I agree 100%, which is why I feel that a site with a slightly stronger commitment to facts and perspective would be a better use of my reading time. With everything the GOP and the White House administration is doing, is it really newsworthy that Jean Schmidt cut-n-pasted without attribution in the service of keeping kids from getting run over by schoolbusses?


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:44 PM
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Is it too blindingly obvious to suggest that the mere use of baby/girl/etc. for the woman and daddy/papa/etc. for the man is a sufficient condition for creepiness, equating all love to incest?


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:46 PM
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Coldplay's "Fix You" is kind of weird. It seems to be sung to someone in almost a catatonic state of helplessness.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:46 PM
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214, you also have to factor in the use of "mami", or as I spell it, "mommy", to address women.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:48 PM
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214: Yes.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:50 PM
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"I have read a fiery Gospel writ in burnished rows of steel;
'As ye deal with My contemners, so with you My grace shall deal';
Let the Hero, born of woman, crush the serpent with His heel,
Since God is marching on.
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah! Glory! Glory! Hallelujah!
Glory! Glory! Hallelujah! Since God is marching on."

Jerry Falwell? or Osama bin Laden?
Julia Ward Howe


Posted by: bill | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:51 PM
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if the stress here is on the *unintentional*, i.e. songs that have an effect wholly opposed to what a superficial listen might suggest,
then i'd nominate the beach boys' "we've been having fun all summer long."

it's not creepy, it's just so unintentionally bleak. the lyrics are chirping away about miniature golf, and the melody and changes are telling you something very different.
a heartbreaking, haunting howl of loneliness, loss, finitude, and despair.

even there, i'm not sure 'unintentional' is the right word, since brian wilson.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:52 PM
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I can't stand "Fix You", Neddy.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:56 PM
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You're not the only one, ben. That's one of my all-time favorite scathing music articles, and fits with this thread.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 2:59 PM
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166: She's a friend of a friend; you don't. (Also, she's having a solid stage career.)


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:09 PM
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She's a friend of a friend; you don't

But keep in mind that we know nothing about SCMT. My current guess, that he's 007, makes me think he just might have a shot.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:23 PM
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OK, then when does Ryder hit bottom so I can save her?


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:25 PM
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"Ben" by the young Michael Jackson
A friendship/love song addressed to a rat.


Posted by: joel hanes | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:28 PM
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AWB beats me to the punch with "Mrs. Brown" at 112.
And the band name, "Garry Lews and the Playboys" ... branding yourself with the Hefner rabbit-head. Creepy.

Everything Rod Stewart has done in the last twenty years is creepy. "Come on girl, 'cause heaven knows."
This from a bony sixty-year-old in loud skintight silk pants and a silk shirt open to his navel. Brrr.


Posted by: joel hanes | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:35 PM
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This from a bony sixty-year-old in loud skintight silk pants and a silk shirt open to his navel

And with a gallon of spooge in his gastrointestinal tract. At least that's what I heard.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:38 PM
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222: You can introduce her to me SCMT.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:40 PM
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It's my understanding that "Butterfly Kisses" was written by Bob Carlisle. It's since been released by a number of country acts.

FWIW, searching the term "Butterfly Kisses" on Google gives an interesting 3rd result. It has to be a joke:

Butterfly Kisses - Celebrating Love Between Women and GirlsInternational support group for female girl lovers - Celebrating love between women and girls.


Posted by: Klug | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:41 PM
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How was it teo? I'm always on the prowl for good history books.

Very good. Here it is. There's a second volume, which I don't have, but the first stands on its own.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 3:52 PM
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Too bad Remembering Laci disappeared. Incredible song.


Posted by: Michael Vanderwheel, B.A. | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:02 PM
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Hey little boy, would you like to know
what's in my pocket or not
It's no ploy, it's no gimmick,
It's the chance of a lifetime to see
something that's never seen by mere mortals


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:07 PM
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232 was me


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:07 PM
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Depressing lyrics and creepy really give a similar feeling. I was sure i'd find something (not unintentional, but how many relaly were in this thread?) that would be really creepy in The Chameleons work, but i got nothing.

although this is pretty close:

And he stalks the night
With sonar senses
And he holds you tight
Masturbates the madness in you

He dreams when he's not sleeping
Plays the trusted friend
Trust him friend
About as far as you can piss


Posted by: yoyo | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:18 PM
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115: to say nothing of the lyrics in the original German (it's the song that gets drowned out by the Marseillaise in that scene in Casablanca, I think).


Posted by: Katherine | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:25 PM
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I can stop lying
I can stop punching my own face
I can stop stealing money
I can stop hating my own heart
I can do it
Because of you

I can stop scratching up my cheeks
I can stop drinking so much
I can stop wanting to kill myself
I can stop wanting your perfect heart

I can do it
Because of you

I can start listening
I can say Hi
I can feel something good
Little panda McElroy


Posted by: andtheotherwayaround | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:30 PM
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I only count a few lines in this whole thread that are actually UNINTENTIONALLY creepy.

I certainly can't think of any examples right now, although the concept sounds familiar.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:35 PM
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that long cool woman in a black dress is Thanatos


Posted by: joel hanes | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:38 PM
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237: All mine, right? What do I win?


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 4:48 PM
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Some earworm country thing called "Daddy's Hands" that I can't bring myself to look up.

Love Prince, but the line in Raspberry Beret, "Built like she was, she had the nerve to ask me / Did I mean to do her any harm?". There's that harm thing again. Unless that's Prince the witty, mocking his chances in a fair fight against a tall girl, which it could be.

"My life has been a poor attempt to imitate the man / I am the living legacy of the Leader of the Band Oh god I must boil my head!
Does creepy in a Father/Son oh please get some therapy kind of way count?

(Sorry if pwnd, on the run here.)


Posted by: Penny | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 5:06 PM
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237 ...although the concept sounds familiar.


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 5:08 PM
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Demetri Martin (minute 4:00) on creepiness:

By the way, if you want to sound like a creep, just add the word "ladies" to the end of things that you say. [...] "Help! I've fallen into a well and I can't get out....ladies."

Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 5:39 PM
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242: interesting. I wonder if you could combine that with the universal rule for how to sound dumb (append "and shit") to sound both dumb and creepy. "Did you know the Gateway Arch takes the shape of a catenary curve, ladies and shit?"


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 5:50 PM
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242 is hilarious.

I've been jonesing for some OP-wear.

Oh dear, SCMT, I might have some for ya. Blew my allowance on the stuff.

Last summer I saw a group of gay tykes outside the mall wearing my grade 10 outfits, but ironically. They looked good. I am that goddamned old!

I loved Jesse's girl as a kid. Enough to go look up "moot".

My favourite old codger asked his French aquaintance, "This is how you sound to me: (in gibberish imitated sound of elegant French), how do I sound to you?"

Frenchman in a nasal monotone:"yah yah yah yah yah".


Posted by: Penny | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 7:19 PM
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242: also around 7 minutes in a discussion of biscuit conditionals.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 7:39 PM
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245: Yes! When I first heard that clip, I was in a car with people. I paused it and explained what a biscuit conditional was. They all stared at me like I was a total drip. What's it like getting that look all the time, b-wo?


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 7:47 PM
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grade 10

Reminds me how much I love The Bare Naked Ladies (which, in turn, reminds me, for no apparent reason, of Big Audio Dynamite's Rush--also great).


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 7:56 PM
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I love The Bare Naked Ladies

Didn't some law pass around 2003 mandating that everyone profess deep hatred of The Bare Naked Ladies?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 7:59 PM
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For once, I'm on the right side of the law!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:00 PM
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Sifu is oppressing me and shit.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:15 PM
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I'm oppressing Emerson, ladies!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:17 PM
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How is it that we don't call Sifu Tweety "Sweety"?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:20 PM
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Dude you don't even want to know the company you'd be keeping if you called me that.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:23 PM
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If you need any more convincing, check the flickr group.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:23 PM
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Sifuty?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:28 PM
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O-stamp, you can call me whatever the hell you want to.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:29 PM
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Y tu, fis?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:32 PM
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Yeastu Feety


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:33 PM
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I often read it as "stfu, tweety".


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:34 PM
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You know, I do to.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:35 PM
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You guys sang karaoke, Tweefu? Who sang what songs?


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:36 PM
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261: I sang "Take On Me" by Ah-Ha, I'm pretty sure Nathan Williams sung a Nirvana song, and everybody else I was too drunk to remember. Blume sang a country song, which song I don't remember, but holy shit did she knock it out of the park. That girl is pro.

I was going to sing "Baby Got Back," but the Karaoke shut down before I got to.

260: "too," stfu, "too."


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 8:39 PM
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I missed Blume's singing. That's a gorgeous picture, btw. I could have stayed a few minutes longer, but at 12:10 I knew that the last bus was coming soon. As it was, it turned out that my bus didn't come until just after 12:30.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 9:48 PM
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BG you're singing next time, kid. No excuses.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 9:50 PM
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I immediately felt bad for calling you "kid," but regardless, you're singing.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 9:51 PM
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Tweety, are you heading out west or are you going to be around town for a while?


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 10:03 PM
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Around town for a while looks much more likely.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09- 7-07 10:04 PM
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238: I loved that song when I was a kid. I had no idea what was happening in it, but I knew it was hott.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09- 8-07 1:06 AM
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Pathetically late to the thread, but:

1) "I Can See for Miles" was always a bit creepy in the "Run for Your Life" vein, but it takes a whole new turn when performed a cappella by Petra Haden and the Sellouts.

2) I was bit creeped out when I heard Cat Stevens (years ago before the turn to Islam) claim that Mona Bone Jakon was a pet name of his for his penis.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 09- 8-07 7:45 AM
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A dead corpse gets up and starts dancing - crreeepy!

Compared to any other kind of corpse? I think not.

More on-topic; Steely Dan made a career out of embedding creepiness in jazz-funk gloss. Practically all their songs imply some kind of awful pornographic comeuppance just around the next knowing triple beat.

Warren Zevon, of course, satirised the whole genre (a very old one; the murder-ballad tradition) with Excitable Boy. But then, that's all deliberate, calculated creep.

Although the Dan lyric "Who has a friend named Melanie/who's not afraid to try new things?" always sounds to me as if it's going to turn ugly..


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 09- 8-07 3:04 PM
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I'm adding Zevon to my list of rock musicians whose careers suffered because of their inability to access the butthead chakra. He was crazy enough but not stupid enough. Others include Richard Thompson, Frank Zappa, and Randy Newman.

Successful non-butthead rockers are Steely Dan and Leonard Cohen.

I don't know what the term would be for sensitive buttheads, but emo is stupid, stupid, stupid.

Bob Dylan is hard to categorize in my system. He was and he wasn't. Mick Jagger pulled it off even though he's not actually dumb. Bill Wyman was dumb, though.

Jim Morrison is the King of Buttheads.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 09- 9-07 8:28 AM
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Best deliberately creepy song:
I Want You, Elvis Costello.

I don't think I can live without you
And I know that I never will
...
You've had your fun you don't get well no more
I want you
Your fingernails go dragging down the wall
Be careful darling you might fall
I want you
I woke up and one of us was crying
...
Go on and hurt me then we'll let it drop
I want you
I'm afraid I won't know where to stop
...
Did you call his name out as he held you down
I want you
...
You've had your fun you don't get well no more


Posted by: emir | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 4:39 AM
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Totally late to this thread, but people, they don't get any more unintentionaly creepy than this.

She's just 16 years old, "Leave her alone," they said / Separated by fools, who don't know what love is, yet / But I want you to kno-ow / If I could fly, I'd pick you up / and take you into the night, and show you a love / like you've never seen, never seen

Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:57 AM
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