Re: QED

1

Becks, cherry pick from the soon to be divorced pool.

For the low, low, low cost of just $29.99 per month, I will send you a list of the best prospects who will be hitting the market within the next 6 months.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:12 AM
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soon to be divorced pool

With a little effort on your part, you could even expand that pool.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:16 AM
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That is a real, and odd, age barrier -- haven't been there myself but have seen friends hit it. The point where everyone appropriate to date is on their second marriage.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:18 AM
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Shouldn't you wait for the second marriage to end before you start dating them?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:20 AM
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1 ties in nicely with something I read about e.e. cummings' personal life this weekend:

[The Dial publisher Scofield] Thayer married Elaine Orr on 21 June 1916. He commissioned his friend E. E. Cummings to write his poem "Epithalamion" as a wedding present. The marriage did not last long, however, as by 1919 Elaine was having an affair with Cummings, even giving birth to a daughter, Nancy, by Cummings in December of that year.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:21 AM
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4: Oh, I meant through their first, heading for their second.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:22 AM
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You know you are old, when you stop thinking about whether you will date someone with kids or someone who has previously been married.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:25 AM
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Snarkout:

I'd sleep with cummings if he was saying or writing stuff like:

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:27 AM
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This blog used to be funny about sodomy.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:28 AM
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You could change your pseud to Buttsmasher and start us back down the one true path.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:31 AM
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8: That's a beautiful poem, and one that means a great deal to me.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:33 AM
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11--
man, ain't poetry great.

it's ability to mean so much to one person, when to another person it seems so lame.

i mean, i'm one of your biggest fans, lb, but eec's use of endearments in their is so intrusive and artificial.

it sounds like the standard sit-com gag where a couple are getting into a fight, and the more tense and p.o.'d at each other they get, the more they start their sentences and clause with "honey" and "dear".

still, there's a neat coincidence in the fact that i would never say that stuff to will, and will would never sleep with me anyhow.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:38 AM
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yeah, sorry, "in their" s/b "in there"


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:39 AM
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Sodomy is the new poetry.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:40 AM
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6: I was teasing you.

When my friends starting hitting their early 30s, a few of them got divorced, and I realized what a great pool "recently divorced women" is to draw from if you were interested in low commitment sex. My friends all had the looks and sex drives of young people, but no interest at all in ever getting entangled in a relationship ever again.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:40 AM
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Eh, it's all personal associations.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:41 AM
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My friends all had the looks and sex drives of young people, but no interest at all in ever getting entangled in a relationship ever again.

Now you're just being mean and taunting us.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:43 AM
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I realized what a great pool "recently divorced women" is to draw from if you were interested in low commitment sex. My friends all had the looks and sex drives of young people, but no interest at all in ever getting entangled in a relationship ever again.

Isnt that the truth!

Kid Bitzer:

I would definitely sleep with you! But, not that other Kid Bitzer who comments on Tuesdays and Thursdays.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:44 AM
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When my friends starting hitting their early 30s, a few of them got divorced, and I realized what a great pool "recently divorced women" is to draw from if you were interested in low commitment sex

and presumably, not massively concerned with a self-image as an ethical person.


Posted by: dsquared | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:44 AM
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and presumably, not massively concerned with a self-image as an ethical person.

Why? Sex outside marriage?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:45 AM
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19: Women are allowed to like sex for its own sake, d^2. At least in the US.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:46 AM
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19: What's wrong with having low-committment sex with someone who wants the sex and doesn't want the committment? I could see it being depressing, and involving spending a fair amount of time with sad people, but I'm not getting the unethical bit.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:47 AM
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18--

dude, your loss.

'cause that one told me she's got the hots for you.

(and, yeah, granted, i'm ornerier. a lot.)


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:49 AM
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My guess is that dsquared is working the "don't take advantage of people during their time of trial" angle, not thinking that maybe we're having our time of trial right now.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:51 AM
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22--
maybe the thought is that it is predation on an emotionally vulnerable population, like hitting one a widow the day she learns of her husband's death.

dsquared, just remember to wait a decent interval, that's all.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:51 AM
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22: To be fair, it's not hard to believe that d^2's personal experience has led him to believe that it's not possible for women to like sex for its own sake. And we're all trapped by our own experiences.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:51 AM
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22: It wouldn't have even been sad and depressing. Both of the people I am thinking of adopted an attitude of cheerful, licentious, cynicism.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:53 AM
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26: Well played.

24, 25: Oh, sure. I thought the idea was that the defined population tended to be actively seeking low-committment sex, so not so much with the predation. More with the strategic placement of oneself as a harmless, big-eyed, bunnyrabbit to be predated upon in a mutually enjoyable manner.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:54 AM
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predatedpreyed

I'm so terribly ashamed.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:55 AM
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Yeah I wasn't thinking of the "Prey on the emotionally vulnerable" aspect at all. It was more like wanting to party with people who had recently been released from prison.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:55 AM
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29--
are expressions of terrible shame part of presenting yourself as harmless and big-eyed?


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 8:59 AM
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No, they're spillover from my current feelings about work, involving a great deal of self-loathing. (Generally, I am harmful but big-eyed.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:01 AM
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To get back to the original post, I think taking .5+7 to define the range of people you can date, as opposed to hook up with, is pretty optimistic. Not many thirty year-olds will want to marry someone 46, even if they do want to sleep with them.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:02 AM
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From a geezer- I was single until my late-30s. I didn't find the pool to shrink much and had some decent, relatively long-term relationships- which is to say there were definitely less interested in casual relationships (not that there's anything wrong with that). And I'm not even good-looking or important. So no worries for y'all.


Posted by: terpbball | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:02 AM
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The Lévy distributions are better company than most people.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:02 AM
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Not many thirty year-olds will want to marry someone 46, even if they do want to sleep with them.

What are you saying Ogged? Because, at 46, people are OLD!???!?!?!


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:05 AM
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I'm just describing the attitudes of the youth, will; don't get bent out of shape, you'll give yourself a heart attack.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:06 AM
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Half+seven is a stupid, stupid rule. The only thing it does is, under the assumption that the older partner is male, scale out a woman's fertile years so that a man of almost any age is entitled to marry a pre-menopausal woman. That's all it does.

It just doesn't work as any sort of modern-era rule of thumb for what looks unseemly -- everyone should date whoever they want, assuming there's nothing else wrong about it, but using a rule of thumb like that doesn't get you anywhere. (I mean, xkcd is forgiven because (a) genius, and (b) you need a formula to make the joke work, but people taking the formula seriously are being weird.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:06 AM
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33: ?

I would define "date" as similar to "hook up with", not similar to "marry".


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:07 AM
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And I'm not even good-looking or important.

Or a Carolina fan. There really is somebody for everybody.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:07 AM
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I think ogged is using 'date' as 'enter into an emotional relationship with.' Not 'we went on a date', but 'we're dating'.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:08 AM
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Right.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:09 AM
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41: Actually, I think ogged's trying to explain a dry spell, which is hard in the face of his Noth-like looks.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:14 AM
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This concept is also changing as you see more old people (ie above 40) staying in shape. One of the hottest women I know is 52.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:14 AM
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Well, none of these rules work for dating lifeguards.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:15 AM
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When my love swears that she is made of truth,
I do believe her though I know she lies,
That she might think me some untutored youth,
Unlearnèd in the world's false subtleties.
Thus vainly thinking that she thinks me young,
Although she knows my days are past the best,
Simply I credit her false-speaking tongue:
On both sides thus is simple truth suppressed.
But wherefore says she not she is unjust?
And wherefore say not I that I am old?
O love's best habit is in seeming trust,
And age in love loves not to have years told.
Therefore I lie with her, and she with me,
And in our faults by lies we flattered be.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:15 AM
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One of the hottest women I know is 52.

That's just your eyesight going, Will. Heck of a silver lining, though.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:15 AM
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38--
agreed.
what you said about premenopausal, but also--it has the effect of guaranteeing that no one sleeps with early teens except other early teens, which is better than the alternatives.
still, stupid as a serious rule.
i guess that's why i have always assume it is purely jocular.
(no one could actually *mean* that, right?)


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:16 AM
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47 in jest, and no offense to hot fifty-somethings everywhere.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:16 AM
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49--
don't worry--i wasn't offended in the least.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:18 AM
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47 in jest, and no offense to hot fifty-somethings everywhere.

Ogged did the math and suddenly realized his mistake.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:21 AM
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52

40- I do root for Caroline over Duke every time, regardless of standings. Does that help?


Posted by: terpbball | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:29 AM
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Carolina, of course.


Posted by: terpbball | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:30 AM
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52: It means you're not a moral monster, at least. Which might go some way to explaining why you found dating in your thirties less problematic than some others.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:38 AM
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47 in jest, and no offense to hot fifty-somethings everywhere.

You're to young for us anyway, ogged, you punk.


Posted by: hot fifty-somethings | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:44 AM
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In the spirit of comity, I note how impressed I am that you typed a whole comment in only 28 minutes.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:46 AM
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too, goddammit. the typing skills are going fast.


Posted by: hot fifty-somethings | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:46 AM
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Do you imagine we hot persons hang around this popcorn stand all day? No, we are too busy and important for that, sonny.


Posted by: mcmchot fifty-somethings | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:49 AM
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this popcorn stand

Way to win the youth vote.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:50 AM
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Fuck! I can't even keep an alias going. Time to retire.


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:52 AM
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Half plus seven doesn't have to be gender specific, and it offers a pleasantly wide range if you can put yourself on either side of the equation. E.g. at 30, the range is 22 to 47; at 40, it's 27 to 66.


Posted by: unimaginativeguywhocantthinkofawittycybernym | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:53 AM
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Now I feel guilty.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:54 AM
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I have excellent guilt-fu, for a non-mother.


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 9:58 AM
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I love E. E. Cummings, though mostly not for his love poems -- more for his death poems. Let me urge you, however, regardless of your feelings about Cummings' poetry, to read The Enormous Room, his memoir about his time in prison in France during WWI. It's vivid, funny, terrible, and humane.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:05 AM
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61: Sure, but it doesn't actually describe anything corresponding to real social mores -- either in existence or that anyone sane would advocate. Who out there would say that the line between creepy and non-creepy for who a forty-year-old can date is at 27? If 27 doesn't bother you, 25 wouldn't. Likewise, someone who's happy with a forty year old dating a 66 year old isn't going to be bothered if the forty year old is thirtynine instead.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:10 AM
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LB rediscovers the sorites paradox.


Posted by: zadfrack | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:18 AM
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No, I'm saying that that formula isn't a ballpark-sensible method of line-drawing. People who get tense about age-differences are going to get tense well within its limits; people who don't get tense aren't going to give a damn.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:23 AM
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But wherefore says she not she is unjust?
And wherefore say not I that I am old?
O love's best habit is in seeming trust,
And age in love loves not to have years told.

Though I'd certainly hope that it's possible for such a relationship to exist without the older partner needing to turn a blind eye to the infidelities of the younger.


Posted by: Anne Knish | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:27 AM
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Maybe it's more a guideline than an actual rule.

And anyway, there are surely tons of examples of laws that exist largely because having one line drawn somewhere, even if it doesn't reflect the true diversity of experience, is better than throwing up one's hands and saying "everything must be decided on a case by case basis."


Posted by: Jake | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:33 AM
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68--

i thought her dishonesty consisted simply in her lying to him about his age, not in any infidelity on her part.

though i suspect old will would have been willing to turn a blind eye to that as well. he's writing in a mood in which you feel like you are old enough not to sweat the small stuff.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:34 AM
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69: Sure, where you need to draw a line, but this is not such a case. What, we're going to prohibit 25-40 marriages? I don't think so. It's a silly formula: it includes a whole lot of pairings that look creepy, if you're being judgmental like that, and the ones it excludes aren't any creepier than the ones it includes.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:37 AM
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though i suspect old will would have been willing to turn a blind eye to that as well. he's writing in a mood in which you feel like you are old enough not to sweat the small stuff.

In many marriages, compromises are made or one partner turns a blind eye to something that other people might find offensive.

Just because fidelity is the most important thing to you, doesn't mean it is to everyone else.

Or, put another way, does "till death do us part," contain the exception, "except in cases of infidelity"?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:39 AM
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look, will, you already said you'd sleep with me back in 18.
now you're trying to rationalize cheating on me?


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:44 AM
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71: Not at all. But I think that as a "not knowing anything more about the situation, I raise my eyebrow" rule of thumb, it's not so bad.


Posted by: Jake | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:44 AM
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I raise my eyebrow" rule of thumb, it's not so bad.

Right, kinda like don't date coworkers. Plenty of people do it and sometimes it works out, but more often it ends poorly.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:47 AM
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75:

Most likely to end poorly when your mother-in-law works with you.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:49 AM
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Or, put another way, does "till death do us part," contain the exception, "except in cases of infidelity"?

Say what? Along with "till death do us part" there's "forsaking all others." The contract has already been breached!


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:50 AM
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No one's going to read The Enormous Room.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:50 AM
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Foxytail, you can console yourself with this page of excellent drawings by and photographs of Cummings.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:51 AM
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77--

what if you mistakenly thought that "forsaking" was new slang for an old move.
heh baby, let's get for...saking!
(i wanna forsake wid chew, wanna forsake wid chew...)


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:54 AM
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78--
look, i've got nothing against cummings as a poet.
i just find that lower case thing completely annoying.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 10:55 AM
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Ha, I know the guy who wrote that.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:00 AM
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Thou shalt not sit
With statisticians nor commit
A social science.

Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:02 AM
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Eh. I think it's a bad rule, because if you're going to be judgmental about age differences at all, it vastly understates the point at which looking askance should begin. (I can sympathize with the position that no one should be looking askance at anyone else's relationships, but a rule that says 60-38 is within a limit where no one should consider it problematic, even if we generally worry about such things, is screwy.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:03 AM
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84--
agreed.
ordinary sensibilities would be more closely captured by the rule

younger > (older- (older's decade/5))

a four year gap in your twenties, six-year gap in your thirties, etc.
when i get to eighty, this will allow me to cradle-rob some hott 64 year olds.

still, i wonder whether a better rule will require us to go log.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:12 AM
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71: It's a silly formula: it includes a whole lot of pairings that look creepy, if you're being judgmental like that, and the ones it excludes aren't any creepier than the ones it includes.

"aren't any creepier than" s/b "are only slightly more creepy than." We make judgments about shades of gray all the time, and this seems as appropriate a subject for them as any, especially considering that it's not a weighty matter like the law. Also, I was going to say what kid bitzer said in 48 about it mattering on the teen/young adult side of things, but he said it first. A 40-year-old dating a 26-year-old might be fine, but a 22-year-old dating a 17-year-old is very likely not a healthy relationship, or at least, a sign of something unhealthy about one of them.

A propos of nothing, I'm a 25-year-old with a moribund dating life, and posts and comment threads about relationships (happy/normal/long-term relationships) sometimes depress the hell out of me. Why hasn't Emerson commented here yet?


Posted by: Cyrus | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:15 AM
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I think a better rule is "Date who you like" modified by "People who deliberately prey on a partner's youth and inexperience suck" and "People in relationships predicated on an exchange of sexual attractiveness for money and similar tangible goods are skeevy." Harold and Maude can go right on being happy together.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:16 AM
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Rules are silly, and all kinds of different kinds of compatibilities are possible. In general, the only drawback I found from dating much older guys was that, if when I was 17 and he was 28, or when I was 24 and he was 43, we were compatible in temperament, maturity, and wisdom, it wasn't long before I realized that I felt I had so far to go, but that he was already much more fixed. I've changed remarkably over the past 10 years, and had I tried to stay with one of them, I think I'd resent them for holding me back. But in the short term, those relationships were very good for me. Drove my parents nuts, of course.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:16 AM
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A propos of nothing, I'm a 25-year-old with a moribund dating life, and posts and comment threads about relationships (happy/normal/long-term relationships) sometimes depress the hell out of me. Why hasn't Emerson commented here yet?

Have you considered dating Teo?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:18 AM
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87 works pretty well for me.


Posted by: cerebrocrat | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:23 AM
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It's funny that this thread popped up today. Just this weekend, Rory (daughter, age 8) informed me that it is Wrong to date where there is a 15 year age difference. (Raised in the context of why it's not okay for me to observe that Zac Ephron is a cutie. If you don't know who Zac Ephron is, you probably also don't have an inane soundtrack marketed to the tween demographic lodged in your head.)


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:26 AM
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Heh. It's a shame you're not a New Yorker. Sally would probably enjoy a playdate.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:28 AM
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Interesting, too, as Rory tells me all the time she wants to take a trip to New York. I've never been, and I'm not at all sure what she knows or thinks she knows about it, other than to have proclaimed, at age 4 or so that the Yankees are ruining baseball. But if we do someday make it to your town, I'm sure Rory would love the playdate, too.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:34 AM
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I use the square root plus twelve rule.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:36 AM
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94--
better put an absolute value in there, tho.
dating the negatively aged fits squarely into the creepy category.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:40 AM
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I use the square root plus twelve rule.

Woo-hoo! 18-year-olds are back in play!


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:41 AM
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95: Agreed, but I note that to date the negatively aged under Sifu Tweety's rule an taking the negative square root of your age, you would have to be over 144.

And if you're still dating at that age, I say more power to you!


Posted by: zadfrack | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:44 AM
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If you live to 144, the government should give you your own twelve-year-old.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:49 AM
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89: What gender is Teo?


Posted by: Cyrus | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:50 AM
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97--
ah, well, there we differ.

to my mind, dating the negatively aged is only creepier when done by cent-and-a-half-enarians.

or the undead. you want to go out to a bar and see some undead geezer dating a chick who is only, say, -17 years old? it's seriously distasteful, i'm telling you.

and that's why we *need* these rules.

i know, lb and awb are going all mushy and saying lighten up man if it feels good do it, and i'm saying: don't listen to them. that sort of stuff will result in mummies from the tomb dating fetuses from the future, and you just have to draw a line in the sand against that kind of thing.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:54 AM
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99: Male, but nobody's perfect. </Some Like It Hot>


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 11:58 AM
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71. Absolutely. For example, my parents 38/25 contrived not to be creepy, because they shared most of their outlooks and interests.

OTOH, this is mega-creepy, because of the nature of the fantasy and the fantasist:

Ancient Person, for whom I
All the flattering youth defy,
Long be it e'er thou grow old,
Aching, shaking, crazy cold;
But still continue as thou art,
Ancient Person of my heart.

On thy withered lips and dry,
Which like barren furrows lie,
Brooding kisses I will pour,
Shall thy youthful heart restore,
Such kind show'rs in autumn fall,
And a second spring recall;
Nor from thee will ever part,
Ancient Person of my heart.

Thy nobler parts, which but to name
In our sex would be counted shame,
By ages frozen grasp possest,
From their ice shall be released,
And, soothed by my reviving hand,
In former warmth and vigour stand.
All a lover's wish can reach,
For thy joy my love shall teach;
And for thy pleasure shall improve
All that art can add to love.
Yet still I love thee without art,
Ancient Person of my heart.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:08 PM
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103

101: Not my type, I'm afraid. When I wrote a comment like 86, I guess should have known in the first place to mention that I'm a straight male.


Posted by: Cyrus | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:09 PM
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104

I'm more or less in line with the principles in 88 (I think about these issues wearing my "dad" hat, not my "potential partner" hat) but I have to say that I'd be less than thrilled at the prospect of meeting a 43 year old with the maturity of a 24 year old. Or a 28 year old with the maturity of a 17 year old.

No offense to AWB.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:10 PM
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105

Oh, it was clear. I was just goofing.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:11 PM
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106

102--
yikes, even i as an ancient person myself find that a bit creepy.

sounds kind of like dickens-porn. he's always pairing up child-brides with aged bones.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:21 PM
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107

106: Yeah -- the head-fake that way in Bleak House is disturbing, even though she ends up with a similarly aged guy.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:25 PM
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108

107--
esther and jarndyce in the growlery, yeah.
but it's not just bleak house, by any means. it's already there in copperfield. his sainted teacher, with reverend locks, is hitched with a young babe who is suspected of getting it on with a contemporaneous buck.
plus, that's where the original 'child-bride' comes from (dora?)


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:34 PM
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I dated a guy in college who was 10 years my senior. I learned this only after the first few dates, and my initial reactions was, "So what? Age is just a number." Then it struck me that I'd graduate before him, that he still hadn't declared a major, and that something just seemed wrong to me about a guy pushing 30 who could still blend so easily with the 19 year olds.

On the flip side, I know a 60 year old woman who's been very happily married to a 39 year old guy for the last 15 years. So, maybe age is just a number after all.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:37 PM
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110

Then it struck me that I'd graduate before him, that he still hadn't declared a major, and that something just seemed wrong to me about a guy pushing 30 who could still blend so easily with the 19 year olds.

It's okay, Sifu. Everyone still thinks you're great.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:39 PM
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111

head-fake that way in Bleak House is disturbing

Esther should have been sold to Guppy. Her cloying voice nearly spoils a masterpiece, like Tolstoy's yammering about history. Didn't Clint Eastwod recently become a father?


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:42 PM
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112

xkcd is lame.


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:54 PM
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113

GET OUT


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:55 PM
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95: dating the negatively aged fits squarely into the creepy category.

This would obviously not be a problem, since propriety would prevent the as-yet-unborn from dating anybody but imaginary people (and even then the relationships would be very complex).


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:55 PM
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115

110: as if I blend in. Besides, I totally have a major!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:56 PM
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116

113: I only speak the truth. And if I only tacked hastily-drawn stick figures onto it, I could even call it a "webcomic."


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 12:58 PM
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117

114: Snickering at that makes me a huge dork, right?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:00 PM
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118

It depends; were you on the debate team?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:02 PM
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119

110, 115: Okay, now I feel bad.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:03 PM
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120

Nah. Too lazy for anything organized. I was dorky enough for anything, but not particularly energetic.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:03 PM
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119: I wouldn't. Unfogged is a hard, cold, cruel environment. It's all about pain. And sodomy. But mostly pain.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:07 PM
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119: yeah, how dare you imply it would be kind of gross if I dated a 19 year old.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:07 PM
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123

It's all about pain. And sodomy.

But you repeat yourself.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:09 PM
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124

122: Kinda depends on the specific 19-year-old.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:10 PM
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125

On the flip side, I know a 60 year old woman who's been very happily married to a 39 year old guy for the last 15 years. So, maybe age is just a number after all.

I knew a 28 year old man who married a woman of 50+ (his landlady, not that it matters a damn) and the local paper thought it wise to make it the main headline on the front page. Not just a number if it's your life.



Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:14 PM
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I have to say that I'd be less than thrilled at the prospect of meeting a 43 year old with the maturity of a 24 year old. Or a 28 year old with the maturity of a 17 year old.

Charley gets it exactly right.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:25 PM
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But, but -- I don't like pain. (Or sodomy, really. But mostly pain.)


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:38 PM
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128

"You're not going to like Wednesdays."


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:42 PM
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129

you realize that sodomy includes oral sex, right?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:44 PM
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130

The comments on the link in 124 are truly depressing. As is this: "Possibly," said sheriff's spokesman Kevin Doll, "she could be a victim in this."


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:46 PM
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131

Age is just a number all right...a number that indicates HOW CLOSE YOU ARE TO DEATH.


Posted by: marcus | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:52 PM
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129: Okay, but I still don't like pain.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 1:55 PM
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133

The problem with aging and dating isn't a shrinking pool. It's becoming jaded.


Posted by: marcus | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 2:19 PM
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134

Or becoming jaded by the shrinkage in the pool.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 09-10-07 2:35 PM
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