Re: Passive-Aggressive Plastering

1

Back in Oregon an M.D. hobby farmer threw a "bringing in the hay" party. For me that would rank only slightly above the "shovelling out the hog barn" party.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:43 AM
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1st wife and I did hold a demo party before a remodel. Left the installation to the professionals. Swinging the sledge was definately theraputic. Very little real work was done, most of the "demo" consisting of graffitti on the walls that were going to be removed. As the evening wore on the cleverness of the graffitti suffered.


Posted by: tassled loafered leech | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:53 AM
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Say, Tom, let me whitewash a little.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:56 AM
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Yeah, but Tom was more psychologically sophisticated.


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:57 AM
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4--
he had to be-- he couldn't offer joe & ben martinis.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:58 AM
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A demo party like in 2 sounds like fun. Anything else is just daft.


Posted by: Trevor | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:59 AM
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They're just following the trend on "infertility parties," where couples trying to conceive invite over several guys to get drunk and help out.


Posted by: Anderson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:00 PM
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Friends and I have had many such parties working on each others houses, especially in advance of major events like marriage and childbirth, when it really helps to have extra hands to tie up loose ends. The trick is to avoid friendships with people who are incompetent at basic renovation skills.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:03 PM
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8--
yeah, but you're living in portlandia, right?
where basic competence with handicrafts is more widely assumed.
unlike among effete northeasterners.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:06 PM
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8: And never, never be the only one with a truck.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:08 PM
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9: Thanks, I refrained from saying it myself.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:09 PM
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Sadly, truck ownership among us is less common than the ability to use a recip saw. It sucks to be The Guy With the Truck.

Off to pick up my daughters.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:12 PM
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There is a certain, limited role for the old barn-raising / quilting bee tradition in modern life, though I fear its subtle mores are lost on the typical suburban home-owner. I have some pretty fond memories of collective efforts on behalf of a single individual; I remember in particular how the entire community showed up to gussy up the farm of a newly widowed neighbor before it was sold at auction. My prejudices in this regard are doubtless the product of a rural upbringing, but I think my experience is broadly generalizable.

1. Reciprocity is key. You should ideally have an established track record of contributing to this sort of thing for others, and having called on others to help, you must never hesitate to help when a subsequent need arises.

2. [Corrolary to 1] The number of friends who will consider themselves bound by this norm of reciprocity is necessarily limited; if you invite 50 people to your "painting party", you're way over the line. Game theory and cultural anthropology both have some important things to say in this regard. The older and more persistent the relationship, the better. Kinship ties are best.

3. To each according to his need. Your legitimate expectation of assistance is diminished by (1) the frivolousness of the need being served (e.g. putting in a jacuzzi) and (2) your available means to have it done professionally.

4. You must work visibly harder than everyone else: everything should be well-prepared and organized, you must continue to work while others take a break, etc.

5. You must accept assistance with extraordinary grace: not becoming too assertively directive, not looking a gift horse in the mouth, being generous with food and drink, etc.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:12 PM
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Years ago, a friend's family organized a decorating party for him when he got married. They were dreadfully young [him 18, her 16], had no money and were moving into a nasty council flat. So, about 10 of us descended on his flat the weekend of their wedding. Thankfully his dad was a professional painter so we did the whole place in about 14 hours. Everything.

It was a fantastic gift and a really nice thing to be part of.

13 seems wise, too.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:14 PM
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13--
"1. Reciprocity is key."

right. esp. with sawzalls.
if they won't reciprocate, they're not worth a damn.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:16 PM
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5-- Okay, but he could have offered them candy or marbles, or whatever the equivalent was. He knew better.

Admittedly, it's daunting to imagine that you could convince intelligent adults that laying tile is going to be fun. But I could easily be convinced to help knock out walls--the correct ones, even!


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:25 PM
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13 is totally wise. Also I think it sucks to advertise such a thing as a "party"--you just ask a group of friends if they'll come over on Saturday and help you ___, and promise to provide beer and pizza or whatever.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:26 PM
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16 - DOOD! Howdy! I lived on Merganser Street for about 6 months and wondered what a Merganser was but it was the days before Wikipedia and I was too lazy to go to the library to look it up. Then, serendipitously, I was at a museum of natural history and there was an exhibit on mergansers and I was like "aha!". I was just thinking this weekend of maybe using "merganser" as a pseud for something and YOU BEAT ME TO IT.


Posted by: Becks | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:34 PM
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17: which is the standard way to handle moving when all of your friends have a) apartments (or otherwise limited amounts of stuff) and b) can't really afford movers. When you own furniture you can't lift by yourself(ves), there is a nice prisoners dillemma flavor to all of this.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:38 PM
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A sawzall that won't reciprocate is a hacksaw.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:40 PM
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21

it was the days before Wikipedia

Wait, what?


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:40 PM
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20--
a really heavy, awkward, expensive hacksaw.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:41 PM
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I've been part of moving parties forever, and love them and the problems they pose. It used to be several times a year at least, and because I can drive trucks—rentals used to have two ranges of manual gears just like big-boy trucks—and handle dollies and two-wheelers and such, I used to be in demand. I miss that, the last time I did was two years ago when friends of mine moved, just the kind of people who forget how things aren't the same as when we were young, so they're great, but we had a blast. As I say, I miss it, but until my kids start moving, nobody I know needs this kind of help anymore.


Posted by: I don't pay | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:43 PM
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22: with a really short blade.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:45 PM
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A sawzall that won't reciprocate is a hacksaw

Technically, a sawzall that won't reciprocate is a keyhole saw


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:46 PM
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24--
typically, yeah.
but i didn't want to go into details of how 6" is average, and if you look around you can even find 9"'ers but they tend to go floppy, etc....
it's not that i disdain all low-hanging fruit myself. i just don't like to put it up for others to harvest.


Posted by: kid bitzer | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:48 PM
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Re 23: I Don't Pay can drive a two-speed transaxle? Keep on truckin', brother!


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 12:48 PM
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Considering the amount of initiative, strength and general competence my friends and I used to exhibit on them, it's actually rather surprising no dating interest ever grew out of those moving parties. Probably because the people were usually well-known and in relationships.

Even more surprising that nothing ever came of the numerous occasions when I was asked to drive out to some distant, god-forsaken suburban locale to fix and retrieve someone's broken-down car. Someone like Megan would have eaten up my doing that while explicating what was wrong, what I could do to fix it enough to get going, and what analogy it reminded me of. But lyrical engineering students is one type of person U of C just doesn't have.


Posted by: I don't pay | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 1:06 PM
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I've never been asked to help demolish (or refurbish) a house, but a friend of mine who recently got married tried to convince a bunch of us (who were not in the wedding) that it would be REALLY fun to help set up the reception, set up the ceremony, organize the band, set up transportation to and fron the wedding site, drive the couple to get the wedding license, break down the reception, and basically do all of the things that a wedding coordinator/various flunkies would do.


Posted by: justjenny | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 1:18 PM
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Howdy, Becks! I may have beaten you to the pseudonym, but you still got to go to an exhibit on mergansers, and in this respect you have me at a disadvantage: I have never been to an exhibit on Beckses. In the larger scheme of things that seems cooler. For instance, you probably know more about my adopted animal than I do, so if you remember any fun facts about mergansers, please share!

(My knowledge of mergansers: they have awesome-looking crests, at least the common merganser does, and they can swim underwater. They can maybe do other things underwater too, but I believe this is not the blog for such speculation.)


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 1:52 PM
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31

I have never been to an exhibit on Beckses.

A brewery tour, perhaps?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 1:54 PM
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32

22,24-6: quite.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 1:56 PM
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33

I believe this is not the blog for such speculation

There is tremendous and disgusting variety in duck penis size and morphology.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 1:57 PM
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33: Yes, you never know what you're going to see down there once you get the duck home, and not all surprises are good surprises.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 1:59 PM
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35

Consider the Argentine Lake Duck.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:00 PM
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31: Sadly, no. The only beer tour I've been on was at the New Belgium Brewery, and I quickly found that almost all of their beers are too sweet and malty for my tastes.

33, 34: If this is why I have problems dating, maybe I should give up on the idea of hiring a coach...


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:08 PM
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Argentine Lake Duck.

The Lake Wobegon Coot Migration was last week. I saw something like 5000 of them making themselves ready for the trip. We're planning to build a Coot Migration destination resort here.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:13 PM
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37: 5000, huh? Did you at least get some phone numbers?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:20 PM
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39

Coots taste fishy, they say. It's like a local taboo.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:31 PM
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Young coots, Emerson, or old coots like you and I?


Posted by: tassled loafered leech | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:40 PM
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41

Whole coot families. Rafts of coots. Coot villages.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:42 PM
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42

"Coots" is the formal name. The familiar name is "mudhens".


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:42 PM
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43

Exactly how well do you have to know a coot before you can address him as "mudhen"?


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:50 PM
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44

It depends. Some of them are very standoffish and haughty. I believe that they're trying to get the name "coot" replaced with "megaduck" too.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 2:53 PM
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45

They should just change from "Coot" to "Gallinule" as their more southerly relatives have done.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 8:28 PM
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46

This discussion of rallidae nomenclature lends credence to bitzer's suggestion that you all are effete northeasterners who can't use sawzalls. Even Emerson, who pretends to live in Lake W but who I suspect is actually a 26-year-old marketing consultant living in a loft in Soho.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 8:40 PM
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What's a sawzall?

I agree with you, John is way off base if he thinks ducks and coots are as closely related as they superficially appear to be. Try living in the swamp and see what they say about each other when they think nobody is listening.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 8:45 PM
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Ducks are of the family Anatidae, which belongs to a different order from the family Rallidae. The effect of a sawzall is pretty much the same on both, so there's that.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 8:55 PM
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49

47: It's like a Hertz donut.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 8:57 PM
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50

What's a Hertz donut?


Posted by: Franklin Pierce | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 8:58 PM
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51

(punches the 14th president) Hurts, don't it!


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 8:58 PM
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49: It actually is like a Hertz donut. A contractor friend of mine learned about not leaving tools on ladders when he moved a ladder and the sawzall perched on top fell off and plunged into his thigh.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:01 PM
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Ducks are of the family Anatidae, which belongs to a different order from the family Rallidae.

What's this "family", "order", etc crap? Real biologians use cladistics.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:02 PM
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Real biologians

Have read Darwin in the original Aramaic.

max
['None of this Queen Victoria stuff.']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:05 PM
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55

In related news, flip-flops are not appropriate footwear for demolition work. They don't slow nails down much at all.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:06 PM
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53: Cladisticians need to get on the stick and update my library. Until then, kings play chess on fine-grained sand.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:10 PM
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57

Do they still have woodshop and machining classes? Seems like liability would have done away with those. We got to work with lathes and bandsaws and the like in junior high.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:11 PM
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I was wondering the same thing the other day. Not wondering enough to go find out, but wondering.


Posted by: Not Prince Hamlet | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:50 PM
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Do they still have woodshop and machining classes?

Not machining, but we had woodshop in high school, back in 2002. I'm pretty sure it's still there.

The teacher of this class was a little strange. Good at the woodworking stuff, but he used the first few minutes of every class (in our public school) to give a sermon of sorts, that tended to focus on the sinfulness of homosexuality and atheism. A few of us complained to the administration, but nothing really came about from that.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 9:55 PM
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Coots do not like being reminded that they are in no way ducks. In real time I would have 5000 descend on your heads. 10,000 angry red eyes zeroing in on you all at once is no pretty sight.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:04 PM
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All I learned in wood shop is to be very afraid of power tools, because they can take a couple of fingertips off. (Happened to a kid who rode my bus.) Oh, and compressed air can get into your arm through a tiny cut and blow up the skin like a baloon. (Just a story the teacher told.)

I would be better with power tools if I'd never taken wood shop.


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:08 PM
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Kings play chess on fat girls' stomachs.

We had metal shop at my high school. Apparently one kid did get stabbed rather impressively by an improperly mounted tool.

So to speak.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:31 PM
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63

Kingfisher's plangent cries overpower foes' geste songs.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:34 PM
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64

Knightly partisans create onslaught, finishing great slaughter.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:36 PM
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65

Kindred persons cower on fens & grebey swamps.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:37 PM
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66

Knitwear prevents cold over fine gray sweaters.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:39 PM
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67

Katie presumes checking overdrafts & finances generally suck.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:41 PM
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68

Known pedophiles covet our friendly, gentle, swains.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:43 PM
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69

Kalamansi (pretentious citrus) offers fans great sourness.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:44 PM
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70

Kaiser proscribed castrati over field, glen, sea.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:44 PM
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71

Kalamata pits ccngest our freeways greatly, sir.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:45 PM
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72

congest, rather.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:45 PM
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73

Kitchen professionals choose our fine grade steel.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:46 PM
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74

Kites pitch charmingly over far grand scenes.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:47 PM
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75

Kantian philosophers consider frequently good selves.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:47 PM
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76

Oops! No "o" in 75.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:48 PM
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77

Kritarchy presumably confers overall freedoms, guaranteed senators.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:48 PM
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78

Knee pads can facilitate godawful sex.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:49 PM
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79

Ugh, I was modelling 78 after 75. Time to go to bed.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:49 PM
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80

That didn't make any sense.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:49 PM
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81

Kindly pluck courage or flee, good sir.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:50 PM
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82

Kritarchy presumably confers overall freedoms, galls some.

There we go.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:50 PM
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83

81 to 79.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:50 PM
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84

Ken's phallus crept over for gratuitous sucking.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:52 PM
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85

Kaddish publisher considers offer: Farrar garrots Straus.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:52 PM
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86

Kurosawa preferred cinematic opulence; Fellini, gratuitous sex.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:53 PM
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87

Kerning problems covered our fair George's sins.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:53 PM
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88

85 is ridiculous.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:53 PM
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89

Ken's phallus crept over, finding Gayatollah's surprise.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:53 PM
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90

Ken's phallus crept over for gratuitous sucking.

Knob polishing complete, Odile felches Grant's semen.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:55 PM
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91

Kalgoorlie prams carry our fine girls & sons.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:55 PM
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92

Kinks, pedantry corruptingly obfuscate folks' garbled sentences.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:56 PM
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93

Kindly palming Craig's organ, Fergie got sprayed.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:58 PM
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94

Knitted pseudonymous ctenophore ooze fluids, gnomes slouch.


Posted by: eb | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:58 PM
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95

Kabbalists peruse commenters' opii, giggle sheepishly.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:59 PM
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96

Knife proceeds, cutting open fine garments, silken.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 10:59 PM
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97

Kitchen policy: cook only feral giant sloth.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:00 PM
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98

Kuznetsov plays counter our fantastic, gallant, seamen.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:00 PM
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99

opii,

Kurt, pedant, corrects "opera" failure grading Sifu.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:01 PM
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100

Kabbalistic practice can't obnubilate famously gusty Sabbath.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:02 PM
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101

Khrushchev ponders conundrum: obsequiously fellate gorgeous Stalin?


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:03 PM
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102

Kurt pulls coins out from Gina's... satchel.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:03 PM
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103

Kasparov's phoniest chess opening: feign grand-mal seizure.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:04 PM
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104

Knee pads can facilitate godawful sex.

Knee pads can overwhelm fucking godawful ex.

max
['ssssss']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:05 PM
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105

Karthago perit Caesarque occidit falce gravatim se.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:06 PM
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106

99: Killjoy pissants curdle openhearted freewheeling style.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:06 PM
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107

Karpov's premier counter opening: foe's gangrenous scrotum.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:08 PM
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108

Hate to be a killjoy pissant, Sifu, but...


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:08 PM
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109

Knut's problem: can old fish go sour?


Posted by: eb | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:08 PM
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110

106: Klatch pursues compositions of finest grammatical style.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:09 PM
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111

Kreskin proved cheater: one frankly gerade spoon.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:11 PM
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112

Keynote phylogenist's clades overdo favorite genetic sequence.


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:11 PM
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113

Kill pagan compromisers of fearful godly sedulousness!


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:12 PM
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114

110: kicky purpling can obviate festering stuffiness.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:16 PM
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115

"Kyrie!", perorated compassionate Owen, finding god's sympathy.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:16 PM
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116

Krispy pastries chosen over family goodies satisfy.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:17 PM
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117

Kingly paternity can often foul grand schemes.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:18 PM
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118

King presents courtiers opportunity for glorious servility.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:19 PM
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119

Kucinich polls commoners; obvious frontrunner gamed system.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:20 PM
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120

Kramer paid coin O! for George's sins.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:23 PM
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121

Kucinich poles Clinton; Obama, Francis, Gravel spectate.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:23 PM
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122

Krumping perhaps coolest Oakland funny gagster scene.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:26 PM
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123

Slowly Lower Tilly's Pants To The Curly Hairs


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:26 PM
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124

Kassandra prognosticates: catastrophe overhangs future! Great sorrows!


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:26 PM
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125

Will I reveal too much ignorance if I reveal that I am unfamiliar with the original mnemonic on which 123 is based, as well as what thing soever it might serve to mnemonize?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:27 PM
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126

Or if I use "what x soever", what about then?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:28 PM
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127

use it incorrectly, that is.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:28 PM
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128

Bones of the wrist, appropriately.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:30 PM
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129

Knurled penises can only fuck game sadomasochists.

max
['Kookaburra plays cantankerous orthodoxy for gamboling savants.']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:30 PM
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130

And the original is "Some lovers try positions that they can't handle."


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:30 PM
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131

Kindling? Popsicles? Chilly ossuary fellatio, scooter.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:31 PM
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132

But my college roommate's A&P prof was a dirty old man.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:31 PM
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w-lfs-n clearly doesn't have a cousin who had to study for her medical boards.

Keep Portland clear of furries, ganja, specie.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:31 PM
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Scaphoid, Lunate, Triqetrium, Pisiform, Trapezium, Trapezoid, Capitate, Hamate. From the Heian ready position, TJ has blocked my Google-fu.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:32 PM
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135

Keep Papa content. Order fellatio-giving squadron.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:32 PM
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136

No G! No G! My phylum for a G!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:33 PM
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137

Krypto, puissant canine, overwhelms feeble grip of Superman


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:33 PM
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138

As this thread approaches 200 (slowly):

"Kobe" perches calmly, observing 'foggetariat googlin' skillz.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:34 PM
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139

Kingdom, phylum, class, order, family, genus, species.


Posted by: eb | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:34 PM
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140

139 is really the perfect mnemonic, of course.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:36 PM
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141

I don't know how to tell you this, eb, but that's not a grammatical sentence.


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:36 PM
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142

Keep Portland clear of furries, ganja, specie.

Keelhaul pusillanimous, cowardly opponents for gold standard!


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:39 PM
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143

142 relies on construing "opponents for" as "opponents of", of course, but I'm tired.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:39 PM
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144

"opponents for"?


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:39 PM
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145

Knight Phil Collins, or Fergie gets sliced!


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:40 PM
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146

Or, you can construe 'for' as 'for the sake of'. Do it for the gold standard, boys!


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:41 PM
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147

Do try to keep up, Ned.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:41 PM
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148

146—that's what I really meant.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:41 PM
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The principle of charity in action!


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:43 PM
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It may not be a grammatical sentence, but the mnemonic was really helpful for studying French history. You can't understand King Philip's reign without getting into questions of class, order, family, and the growth of the state.


Posted by: eb | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:44 PM
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Kapellmeister preens, cavorts, ogles flamboyant Gayatollah solicitously.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:45 PM
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Kentucky preens, Connecticut opines, Florida gets smashed.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:46 PM
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146--that's what I really meant.

Kowtowed poster conspicuously opts for gooberish save.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:46 PM
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150, I never needed mnemonics to remember that he came over for gay sex.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:46 PM
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Kind, principled charity offers Frege general salvation.

God, that's shit. I'm going to bed.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:46 PM
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Stop stealing my preening, Ned.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:47 PM
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152: preen-pwned?


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:47 PM
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Knights, prosperous crusaders once, finally got screwed.


Posted by: eb | Link to this comment | 10- 1-07 11:54 PM
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We had metal shop at my high school. Apparently one kid did get stabbed rather impressively by an improperly mounted tool.

in my metal class, the actual tools used were about the only things one didn't get stabbed with - the teacher wasn't very interested in anything other than running his own small welding business out of the metalwork room, so we all just busied ourselves with the construction of an array of crude shivs and ninja throwing stars.


Posted by: dsquared | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 5:08 AM
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I walloped a guy with a file; what was I thinking, when hammers were available?


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 7:25 AM
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A month doesn't go by that I don't employ the skills I learned in metal shop. Whenever I peen over a bolt that keeps loosening, or dress a surface or solder something; the list goes on and on.


Posted by: I don't pay | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 8:16 AM
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I haven't been doing much machining, of late. Too bad. And it has been years and years since last I welded.

But I never did take shop.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 10:39 AM
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Knavery persists, confounds order, finishing gentility system.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 11:04 AM
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Knockwurst pwns cock, outperforms Fontana's giant sausage.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 12:32 PM
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King's progeny, crow offering, flails; gibbet sways.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 2:48 PM
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Ever since 9th grade bio, I've kind of wanted a folding glass stool. It sounds as if it would be pretty.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 2:50 PM
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Glass stool? Sounds painful.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 3:09 PM
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Not if well formed.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 3:10 PM
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I delivered an iron stool to a pharmacy once. I asked "Probably you should use some metamucil with this". The pharmacist said "I bet you've been waiting a long time to tell that one".

I've never delivered a black, tarry stool to anyone.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 10- 2-07 9:32 PM
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