Clearly blogs are a product of repressed memories of child abuse.
I don't think this post could get more meta.
in my case it is the ego theory
nobody reads my blog anyway
150 hits only for the whole 2007?
I foolishly left a comment claiming that "Self-Deprecating Narcissists rule the blog scene!".
too lazy to refer to the urban dictionary
I kept journals for four years. One of my apprentice shrinks stole 'em, and I have been worried for near 35 years, that with changed names & details, there is a case study book out there.
Pretty blonde with a husband in finance. I can't remember her name, because I lost my journals. I got all these images and visuals, but it's like a movie without a soundtrack.
So I guess (1). The "I" that these events happened to in the early 70s is gone, and all I have are the events, often with strong feelings attached, but might as well been a dream or a movie instead of biography.
eb has a logger?
Ogg has an ebl-er?
1. So be careful parents, one careless whack on the tush might ultimately launch a thousand posts on unconsummated longings and petty humiliations.
Read, we don't have a link to your blog, as far as I know.
When I get home in January I want to post links to your Mongolian pop music on my own blog.
The world is goin on around you, within you & without you, and how do you know it's your world? How do you claim it? Write it down.
I vote id, but with the self-serving caveat that I truly believe that talking about your embarrasssing shit in public is therapeutic for everyone else who has the same embarrassing shit.
I mean shit, why do the monster-minds do it, those with superior insight, intelligence, sensitivity, observation? Why do the fucking novelists write?
Just cause you ain't got the chops they do, don't imagine you lack their simpler motivations. You & they ain't special.
I don't thin it is egoism, but the opposite. Too much world, needs a center
Should go read Speak Memory or temps perdu or something. But I think I'll nap instead.
Ogg has an ebl-er?
We are all ogg's eblers.
Neat theory, and my ever so humble internet presence certainly incorporates a little of all three, though I'm not sure about equating the ego function with "vanity" or "self-importance."
Ego -- trying to identify and define a "self" through written exploration.
Id -- expressing the secret desires and humiliations that would just be horrifying to acknowledge non-pseudonymously.
Superego -- Looking for validation or reprimand (yes, both) from some external source.
what if someone has a blog but also has something interesting to say of import to lots of people?
Seriously, though, the theory here really only seems to apply to personal blogging rather than other kinds.
I've noticed there's a huge difference, actually, between writing a private diary and writing blogs. I kept little diaries and private notebooks since I learned to write until the age of 17 or so, and they were weird. There would be a few demented drawings, a line or two of twee rhyming metered poetry about my sadness or whatever, a whole section for aphorisms, a few pages of fiction, and maybe a paragraph or two a year that narrated my actual experiences. I think it ended up that way because every time I looked back at my narrations of my experiences, I felt really stupid. "OH, this BOY at SCHOOL who is SO BRILLIANT and with whom I am SINCERELY in LOVE so much so that I solely want HIM to be HAPPY, even if he NEVER returns my LOVE." Like that. Who can bear looking back at something like that? It's intolerably shameful.
But with a blog, it's totally different. I have an audience who serves as a sort of projected ego; I imagine what you all will think and say, and which parts you'll find ridiculous, and I try to figure out whether I can defend those parts or not, and add that defense. My blog has a project, a scope, and a tone (or at least a register). I don't include any fictional asides, and very rarely any poetic ones (exclusively funny things, not good things). I don't draw on it. And in the long run, I find it's re-readable in a way my journals never were. Some of the writing isn't spectacular, and my first blog was truly bad (ragey and overwrought), but I can look through my very old archives without shame. I liked a lot of the things I wrote, and can even find a few nice turns of phrase.
The only things I ever liked re-reading in my journals were my aphorisms. I wrote a ton of good aphorisms as a kid.
Really? Share your aphorisms with us, or, failing that, with me! I appreciate a good aphorism—and a good aphorist. WW,NN.
I will see if I can reconstruct some of them. They were pretty good for infantile aphorisms. But I can't remember any offhand.
25:"Nobody but a fool or a hack ever writes to an audience." ...wiggy gouty dude
(no more offense intended than usual)
Ah. I thought you were referring to the initials of aphorists unknown to me, and I was going to add JJ. But now I won't.
for John Emerson
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8D9FXNmDGlY
i'll post links as many as you like
Someone, maybe Foucault, did a study of early journal writing, and journal writing was often connected to programs of self-examination and self-discipline. I think that there's an aspect of this in blogging -- to use it as a way of self-transformation in the fact of a somewhat select audience.
I used to keep very detailed journals that were part memory aid, part commonplace book, part scorecard, and part self-justification. I lost interest in all that around '00 for a variety of reasons, but I still write sporadic notes in the notebooks I can't break myself of the habit of carrying. I suppose that would be an exercise of my Id, according to Menand, but I always saw it, to a degree, of making sure that my life didn't disappear into the fog.
But there's a public aspect to blogging--and to most blogs--that's absent from keeping a journal. Even the most obscure personal blogs are like messages in bottles. Blogs are 'zines, open letters, and manifestos.
I still do a little private writing, but very sporadically. Part of my development as a student over the past 10 years has been learning to think about my writing as "for" someone, as being part of a rhetorical situation. Writing I do for myself and then show to people feels very low and cheap, even if I like it myself.
why low and cheap
how it will affect the quality of the writing (people reading it)
if it's the same writing
i'd love to read your serious poetry if you post it
I'm just interested in the filthy limericks.
To the extent there's such a thing as an appropriate thread for a shameless, attention-seeking bleg, this seemed to be it. A woman who had been my "best friend" for 20 years has invited UNG and Rory over to celebrate the holidays with her, her husband, and their daughter/my godchild tomorrow. I know they are not worth getting upset over, but I feel completely fucking betrayed and could use some serious cheering up. Please?
Di, that is a deep unkindness, as far from the spirit of Christmas as one can imagine. May 2008 bring you more encounters with true friendship, rather than this false face.
Awwww, Di. May Santa bring all of them except Rory coal.
36: Low and cheap because I'm not very good at maintaining a personal life that's actually personal. My instinct is to share everything with everyone all the time, as a guard against sanctifying myself and my experiences. But when your entire private life is interpreted by a text written for other people, you can start to feel very diffuse. So as much as I write here and at my blog, there is a great deal I reserve for myself, and one has to draw the line somewhere. I draw it at poetry written about personal experiences, and also anything with any serious emotional content (which is why I may seem rather cold online).
37: I posted some (not personal ones) at JP's limerick contest, but they're not my best, as they're too political, and about the femoblogosphere.
Holy crap, Di, that's kind of stunning. If you've been friends for so long, you should pick up the phone and yell at her. Totally serious.
I've seen this happen before, best friends "defecting" after divorce, and it absolutely sucks, Di. What can we do to cheer you up tomorrow? Is it possible to have a virtual sing-a-long?
I did that in March, when her husband did a market analysis on my house for UNG to use in the divorce. (I learned of this when I received my copy by email upon returning home from buying dinner for the motherfuckers.) I got a lecture about honoring my marriage vows. They are truly bad people. I thought I had come to terms with the fact that they are truly bad people. But apparently I haven't. And I really would prefer not to have my daughter spending time with people like that, but I have no control over this shit whatsoever. Which I need to come to terms with. But apparently haven't.
Does she see herself on his side rather than your side now, or is she just clueless?
37:
There once was a lecher named M/tch
who was eager for sex with a b/tch
he found a nice mutt
put his hands on her butt
poor dog bolted like flipping a sw/tch.
I need to come to terms with
Yeah, but you don't need to be Mother Theresa of serenity and forgiveness right this minute. Go ahead and be angry first. There'll be lots of time to be all understanding of how her behavior is probably driven by her own fear later.
I got a lecture about honoring my marriage vows.
Oh. In that case, to hell with them.
I got a lecture about honoring my marriage vows.
Oh. In that case, to hell with them.
45: Just before I filed, she asked me how I felt about them continuing to see him. I told her it would make me very uncomfortable and she told me that "of course" they would honor my feelings. Then they apparently continued to see him behind my back. She is not clueless, she is a self-righteous, self-important, self-serving little bitch.
You could hook her up with ogged to get back at her.
IME from watching my ex's (three-year-long) divorce process, it seems like both he and his wife took the split as an opportunity to do everything with the kids and their homes they felt the other would be most opposed to. It's immature and stupid, of course, but sort of a natural reaction to feeling "freed" from the constraints of a bad marriage. She made the kids spend all their time with their poisonous, egotistical grandfather (whom Max hated) and spent loads of money on designer clothes she knew Max would hate. He became obsessed with trumpeting the causes of anti-consumerism and masculine self-reliance to them at all times, and maybe even dated me as a way of pissing her off by exposing the kids to someone horrified by anti-intellectualism and Cosmo femininity (especially one 18 years her junior). It was a sort of contest to see whose "true self" outside the marriage would win over the kids and all their mutual friends, but those "true selves" were quite exaggerated and false.
That is to say, shit like this is par for the ugly course, but after a few years, and especially once your property and child-rearing situation evens out, will calm down and you can start being more civil about Rory and about your friends.
Actually, Stanley, I've grown to like ogged. I wouldn't do that to him.
53 was not to say that you shouldn't be pissed as fuck at your loser-ass friends who don't love you like you deserve to be loved. Just a hope that this sort of hurtful competition from UNG isn't eternal, and will settle, once he tires of it.
Bummer. Not much you can do other than live well. And be glad that a dishonest and dishonorable person is out (almost out) of your life.
Thanks, AWB. I knew that's what you meant. I share your hope, just lack your optimism.
Thanks, everyone. I really appreciate the support.
Have a killer Christmas celebration with friends who actually DO care about you, and arrange for it to wind down around the time UNG is supposed to drop Rory off. If some of them are people who get under UNG's skin, so much the better.
These ex-"friends" suck. I'm sorry they're being so shitty to you.
Technically, you mean around the time UNG and Rory are expected to return to the house. He doesn't actually move out for 12 more days.
He doesn't actually move out for 12 more days.
Ah, okay, that's particularly rude, an invitation that leaves you sitting at home, intentionally excluded. Ideally, one would like to have a conversation with these friends about the insensitivity.
Take care, Di; this is horrid.
Fucking hell, Di, that's appalling. Do you have somewhere to go for Christmas?
Do you have any port, Di? I just found a bottle of 2002 Teldeschi Zinfandel Port that's just been sitting here for a year, unopened, and its existence is greatly cheering. Why, I believe I'll open it, and raise a glass to you.
Hey, I still have time to make it down to the liquor store before it closes. Solidarity!
There's still eggnog downstairs!
Solidarity!
Hey, I'm late to this party, but I do in reality have a glass of rosé champagne in my hand. To Di!
To Di!
(I'll go check what's in the fridge.)
Okay, fetching eggnog, considering sharing eggnog recipe with beloved pretend internet people.
Okay I will!
1. Separate 16 eggs. Set whites aside.
2. Slowly mix 16 tablespoons of confectioners sugar into egg yolks.
3. EXTRA SUPER SLOWLY mix 1.5-2 fifths of liquor (bourbon and brandy in approximately 80:20 proportion) in with yolks and sugar. Make sure to pour liquor extremely slowly, as it cooks the eggs. Ideally, have somebody on hand to yell at you if you start pouring too fast.
4. Slowly stir 1 gallon milk and cream (in, again, 80:20 proportion) into mixture.
5. Beat egg whites at high speed until they hold a peak.
6. Fold beaten whites into Nog.
7. Enjoy! (Note: gets smoother with time)
73: So should we set up the defibrillation paddles before step 1 or after step 7?
Beat egg whites at high speed until they hold a peak.
Ahwutnow?
Holy god, Tweety, that sounds delicious.
75: if you whip egg whites they eventually get all meringue-y and you can make little sculptural points on top of it that will stay there. If that makes sense. Look, it's a thing. Ask a cook!
74: always good to be prepared.
77: um soft, I think? What's the difference?
79: Soft is when they are just able to hold a peak. Stiff is when they can hold quite a peaky peak.
78: Oh, okay. That does make sense. Thanks!
80: ah. I guess uh on the stiffer side, then. Depends how fluffy you want your eggnog.
73: That sounds delicious Sifu (you sick dogfucker you). I've made basically the same recipe before and it's so seriously good it makes me want to take a flamethrower to that crap in cartons they sell at the supermarket.
Or at least a sharpie (big "NOT" inscribed above the word "Eggnog" on each carton).
But more importantly, I'm currently drinking some Celis Grotten Flemish Ale (the golden one) and I too raise my glass to DiKo. Best of luck with everything, you deserve so much better than what you're currently getting.
Oh I forgot you have to serve it with a bit of nutmeg sprinkled on top of the glass.
83: whatever that crap in the supermarket is, I concur, it is definitely not eggnog.
I got a lecture about honoring my marriage vows.
This is either not a real friend, or your husband has been working overtime to make sure that his side of the story is the only one that gets heard and believed. Or both.
I'm sorry to hear it, Di. That must really smart.
I'm having what Sifu's having, minus the eggs, sugar, milk, cream and brandy. It's bourbonylicious.
I just had a totally kick-ass short rib ragu with a lovely Spanish monastrell. Yummers.
I'd recommend softish peaks, it folds into the rest of the stuff better that way.
Maybe I can talk the flophouse into letting me make some there for UnfoggeDCon II: Blog of Secrets.
I'm having a Red Hook Winter Hook. To Di!
with a lovely Spanish monastrell.
Monastrell? Is that some fancy word for "hooker"?
Maybe I can talk the flophouse into letting me make some
Yeah, I'm sure it'll take some real armsmashin'-twistin'.
I'm going to have a Breckinridge Oatmeal Stout when I get home.
It seems like the microbreweries that distribute around here are 30% Pennsylvania, 20% Michigan/Ohio rust belt, 5% Vermont, 20% California, 15% Colorado, 15% New York. With the odd part being all the Colorado breweries.
88: I was thinking of making some to bring to un foggidycon, but I couldn't get it on the airplane and it's a bit messy for me to make in the kitchen where I'm staying in DC.
With the odd part being all the Colorado breweries.
There are tons of microbreweries in Colorado for some reason. Maybe more than in any other state.
96: Oh well. Just pick up a carton at the cornershop on your way to the party.
97: Maybe Tom Tancredo's just drunk all the time and not actually an idiot.
I'll buy a couple dozen eggnog lattes at spike 'em with SoCo.
Maybe more than in any other state.
Far fewer than California, IIRC. I've read that Portland has the most breweries of any city in the world, but I haven't had a chance to fact-check that claim.
I didn't have the ingredients for Sifu's nog, but it did inspire me to make zabaglione, which I'd been meaning to try for ages. Zabaglione!
Far fewer than California, IIRC.
That would make sense. I do seem to recall reading some amazing statistic about the number of microbreweries in Colorado, though. Maybe it's the most per capita or something.
I'm inspired to wish I had someone nearby who would whip me up something like an eggnog or zabaglione.
104: Zabaglione makes me thinking of turning up in front of the fire at La Laterna on a really cold night. This is a nice thought.
108: And of course that should be La LaNterna.
I'm apparently inspired to die on Christmas by salmonella, rather than in any other festive way.
wish I had someone nearby who would whip me up something like an eggnog
30% Pennsylvania, 20% Michigan/Ohio rust belt, 5% Vermont, 20% California, 15% Colorado, 15% New York. With the odd part being all the Colorado breweries.
PA, 105 percent beer loving.
I've been a naughty eggnog this year.
Mmmm delicious salmonella. No, see, the liquor cooks the eggs. It's science!
I'm spending Christmas in the land of 3.2 beer.
Zabaglione makes me think of smoothing out a hockey rink, for some reason.
115: Not the amount I used (half a glass of port). Plus, I stirred in the raw beaten and sugared whites at the end, just to make sure there was plenty of raw in there. They're good eggs, though, so I might survive. I just like chancing it.
119: Thanks for making that explicit, heebie.
No, see, the liquor cooks the eggs. It's science!
The alcohol might poison the bacteria if there's enough of it, but if you're not using heat in the recipe, that makes no sense.
Salmonella, schmalmonella. Just buy quality eggs and worry not.
Also, liquor does kill pathogens.
And makes the pain of death by salmonella much more bearable.
See, I explained your comment because you didn't know what it reminded you of.
123: Ned, it's science. I mean, geez.
What Stanley means is that I'm smooth, as in I talk glidely.
128: Thanks for making that explicit, heebie.
Mmmm, zabaglione. Now I am craving iles flottantes. I wonder if it would be hard to make it.
All glidely were the heebi-goves.
I'm thinking it would be pretty easy to devise an elaborate meal with raw egg in every one of the dishes. And with biotin capsules on the side, for read.
128: Heebie is covered in lotion.
After looking at recipes online I think that what I am craving is oeufs a la neige, not iles flottantes.
But I wouldn't say no to iles flottantes, either.
Seriously though, salmonella poisoning from eggs is a creation of modern mass production techniques. Buy your eggs from a small, humane producer, and the risk of salmonella is so negligible as to be nothing to worry about. You've got a much better chance of being struck by the lottery.
Wisconsin is probably the drinkingest state in the union, if you exclude New Hampshire and tourist states which sell to lots of non-natives. They have a pretty good local cheap beer called Leinenkugel's. Not 3.2, I'm sure. (For a long time Minnesota had 3.2 on Sundays. It was a compromise blue law: booze on Sundays, but only weak, urination-friendly beers.) As far as I know, there's nowhere that has only 3.2.
130: not if you have a few hours to a couple days to kill.
She puts the lotion on the heebie. She puts the lotion in the basket.
Heebie is a walking talking Standpipe blog.
As far as I know, there's nowhere that has only 3.2.
Friend, come to Oklahoma.
Seriously though, salmonella poisoning from eggs is a creation of modern mass production techniques. Buy your eggs from a small, humane producer, and the risk of salmonella is so negligible as to be nothing to worry about.
This is true. Only about 95% of the US population eats eggs containing risky levels of salmonella.
Salmonella is a product of not using enough liquor. To cook the eggs.
if you exclude New Hampshire
And why would we?
Ohio has liquor in convenience stores but it's all versions of vodka, bourbon, etc. with something like >20% alcohol.
Buy your eggs from a small, humane producer, and the risk of salmonella is so negligible as to be nothing to worry about.
If you eat that raw cookie dough, YOU COULD DIE.
143: like Soju? God I hate that stuff. All the deliciousness of a badly mixed Cranberry and Vodka, with none of the getting drunk? Serve me up some of that!
One more reason to avoid Bartcop country.
Many states near New Hampshire have much higher liquor taxes, and vacationers buy to bring home, thus inflating the stats.
Utah has only 3.2, or at least they used to. They may have changed the law. Gswift?
If I were to make the meal I posited in 132, my wife and her family would die from sheer horror before the salmonella even passed their lips.
145: Like something that looks exactly like regular Jim Beam or Popov, but when you look closely it says "30 proof". I wonder how many manufacturers bastardize their product in order to be sold in such stores. Maybe someone who lives in Ohio can tell us since my knowledge is based entirely on the Ohio Turnpike.
Utah has only 3.2, or at least they used to. They may have changed the law. Gswift?
That's just the rule for supermarkets. The liquor stores carry stronger stuff. The markup is insane.
Holy crap, people, this thread is making me crave, well, eggnog, port, and bourbon. I don't have the ingredients for the first, am all out of the second, and--ooh, hey, look at that...
(Is it too late for a "To Di!"?)
To Di! I'll go and get something.
I'm sorry your friends are being such creeps, and I hope all your good friends rally around and help you feel better.
I want that eggnog of Sifu's. What is meringue with lemon folded in, floating in custard? Is that floating island?
I thought you were in Wisconsin, Heebie. My well-intended comment missed the mark by hundreds of miles.
Oklahoma was the home of an amazing number of jazz musicians and I believe that there is an Oklahoma jazz hall of fame. Muskogee was a big jazz center.
151: Is it too late for a "To Di!"?
Certainly not. She hasn't been here for hours, and that hasn't stopped us.
Only about 95% of the US population eats eggs containing risky levels of salmonella.
Yeah, but fuck them. They've clearly got a death wish.
148: Caesar salad, spaghetti carbonara, and chocolate mousse? It would be like a race to the finish line to see which disease could claim their lives first -- artherosclerosis would give salmonella a run for its money.
Organic eggs should be carefully washed, since chickens are one-holers.
157: Are non-organic eggs different in this respect?
I thought you were in Wisconsin, Heebie. My well-intended comment missed the mark by hundreds of miles.
I accept your apology.
Non organic chickens excrete a delicious dressing that complements the flavor of your eggs, so you definitely oughtn't wash those.
Mmm, a meal where every course contains delicious factory chicken excretions.
156: But aren't the eggs cooked in mousse or carbonara? Caesar salad of course is another matter.
Non organic chickens excrete a delicious dressing
Hollandaise sauce. True fact.
156: Don't forget Steak Tartare! (For some reason in Belgium this was called "Steak Americaine". Maybe the connection is "rapaciousness"?)
162: Cooked in soufflé, but not in mousse.
artherosclerosis
Myth. Not caused by eggs.
Non-organic eggs aren't advertised as straight from the chicken and covered with marks of authenticity.
165: Yeah. I'm kind of a dummy. Mmm . . . soufflé.
Mmmm. Steak Tartare. I am totally making this meal. It would obviate my present challenge, which is to hook up the gas stove before Christmas with fewer than a dozen trips to the hardware store.
Loch Rapacity?
Birthplace of Adam Smith.
168: Yes! It's terrifying! The first time I bought straight-from-the-farm eggs I was pretty squicked by the, uh, streaks.
My father got a huge tapeworm from Steak Tartare. I wasn't there that year, but it made an enormous impression on family members who observed it.
171: There are also lots of yummy cocktails that contain an egg or an eggwhite (as I believe has been discussed recently here).
172: lulz
174: somehow the capitalizing of Steak Tartare is funny.
Blogging is inherently public. Diaries were inherently not public.
174: Um, did they observe it emerge from his, um, egghole? Or do you just mean they observed the ravenous appetite coupled with weight loss?
Hm, my family eggnog recipe is similar to Sifu's, but has a couple of key changes. For the same amount of liquor, we use 50% more egg yolks and twice the sugar, and the dairy is evaporated milk and whipping cream. We whip the cream and fold it in, instead of whipping the egg whites (which just get ignored in the recipe - go make some angel food cake or meringue or something). Finally, it doesn't count if you don't wait about a day between each step for stuff to mellow.
176: Steak Tartare was just her stripper name.
178, up in the midwest a lot of those agricultural institutions keep cows with windows into their various stomachs for learning purposes as well as easy access. Maybe Emerson Sr. was part of a similar curriculum.
176: I remember noticing how Mary McCarthy would capitalize things like "Baked Potato" in her stories to indicate their archetypicity.
Has anyone else noticed that jms has been on fire lately?
I'M ON FIRE.
I'm also pretty drunk, all the time, lately.
184: No, because he/she has a generic and unmemorable pseud.
185: that'll increase flammability, yeah.
I'm also pretty drunk, all the time, lately.
That must be it. Alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, etc.
No, because he/she has a generic and unmemorable pseud.
Maybe to you.
The unhappy, dead tapeworm was observed coiled in the toilet. It was enormous. The effects on Dad were impressive too, IIRC, but I can't remember the second-hand details.
THESE FLY-BY-NIGHT FLAMING GERM-RIDDLED DRUNKEN COMMENTERS NEED MORE pMEMORABLE names.
C'mon, Cryptic Ned. You liked my rondeau, remember? We had some good times. You and me, kid, you and me.
Grandma's mask is slipping! The real opinion holder is being revealed instant by instant, like that dude in the Ah-Ha video!
Ah yes, I now remember that the eggnog recipe I've used before contains both beaten eggwhites (and the yolks too added separately) and whipped cream. It's like a black hole of richnessity. Must. Make.
You liked my rondeau, remember?
Apparently not. He seems to have LB's Disease. Probably from too many raw eggs.
179: I agree that aging is key, but would argue that you can age the whole deal together.
Also using less liquor per egg? Are you crazy? Do you have a death wish?
Since I am hanging out in the ancestral home, with the ancestral kitchen, I can definitely assemble the ancestral eggnog for the event. It's on.
(And of course we have a death wish. We're Quakers, after all.)
Damn now I need to find someplace to make mine.
Using absinthe in an eggnog would help the toxicity along. My son has a source for real toxic absinthe with wormwood.
I'm thinking UnfoggeDCon II is going to turn into a giant eggnog-off.
Bwaaaahaaaahaaa! Just as I'd planned!
Well, if I'd known it was going to be that kind of party...
...I'd have infected the eggnog with both Salmonella and Chlamydia.
You're not allowed to lose your virginity to mashed potatoes, teo. That's only for the Irish.
I'm thinking UnfoggeDCon II is going to turn into a giant eggnog-off.
Of course! UnfoggeDCon II is an anagram of eggnog-off! This was the plan all along.
Damn.
I'd made a resolution to retire the "teo is a virgin" jokes. They're so lame, not to mention not nice.
I'm weak, I am.
205: You've been playing apo's mixes backwords, haven't you?
You're not allowed to lose your virginity to mashed potatoes, teo. That's only for the Irish.
I'm quite Irish, thank you very much.
I'd made a resolution to retire the "teo is a virgin" jokes. They're so lame, not to mention not nice.
Nah, they're fine. Joke on.
I think that both the w-lfs-n and the Teo jokes should be retired. They sometimes go into meanness.
Just abuse Ogged, FL, and B twice as much. They're hardened veterans and also richly deserve abuse.
You're Irish? On the Jewish side or the Navajo side?
210: But John, there is an embarrassment of riches when one anagrams "teo is a virgin".
I'm quite Irish, thank you very much.
Okay then. Fuck on. Mash those potatoes!
Nah, they're fine. Joke on.
Teo and nobody, sittin' in a tree . . . .
We built this blog on w-lfs-n jokes, Emerson. And they're sooo richly deserved. Stop disrespecting our deepest traditions!
I'm quite Irish, thank you very much.
Teo, I thought you were from New Mexico. Anyone from Cork or Clare or Tipperary? We might be related.
This is the part where Gonerill tells us we're not really Irish, right? To Gitmo!
Stanislaus here though he could fool people, but I'm a seasoned veteran and have seen that trick before.
Oh no, an actual Irishman! He's bound to be displeased with us North American impostors!
We built this blog on w-lfs-n jokes,
Montoni plays La Bamba,
Listen to the radio,
don't you remember? we built this blog...
We built this blog on w-lfs-n jokes!
There's a post at Crooked Timber where it is explained that the Irish were the barbarian interlude between the builders of Stonehenge and the English.
Heebie just parodied the worst hippie song ever, damn her eyes. I didn't need to be reminded of that.
225: I thought they were actually some kind of retrograde Moldavan.
225: Merry meet and blessed be, or however the fuck that goes. I am teh Morrigan.
We should have a day during which everyone agrees to deploy at least one grievous grammatical error in every single comment and see how long it takes w-lfs-n to melt.
Oh, and, uh, delete this comment, anyone but w-lfs-n.
Todd Lake disagrees, John:
Great Song | Reviewer: Todd lake | 11/21/2007
Im not an old fart either, im only 12 years old and 80's music is my fav music, music had a meaning back then, now we just have RAP
R.etards
A.ttempting
P.oetry
thats my Defintion on Rap
You cant spell crap without rap. We Built This City is a GREAT song. These days there are good bands but nothing like the 80's
224: Small Our minds think alike. I was looking at the same lyrics, but decided there was not enough to even work with.
Stupid formatting. Attribute those sentiments to Todd or me as you will.
This makes me think that maybe the Jewish Homestate should have been put in Ulster. All the Palestinians I met in Belfast (all one of them) would not have had a problem with this approach, I dont' think.
Effete tree-hugging fairies, the Celts.
All the Palestinians I met in Belfast (all one of them) would not have had a problem with this approach, I dont' think.
Did you actually ask them, or are you just assuming?
237: You expect me to talk to such dangerous barbarians?
The Jewish Homestate should (obviously) have been stuck in Elgin. Cheap real estate, and the locals are very hospitable. It's not too late, you know.
Effete tree-hugging fairies, the Celts.
Shut up, ashhat.
Sounded like "We built this city on rock n roll" by Jefferson Airplane.
239: My (very Jewish) friend who lives in Fargo is quite pleased with it. Safe, and the people are friendly. An unfortunate shortage of nice Jewish boys, though.
Jefferson Starship, Emerson.
But yeah, horrible in its "up-to-date" hippyness.
As you may recall, it was rated the worst song ever according to Blender a while back. (ST apparently disagrees.)
Starship's 1985 anthem, the runaway No. 1 stinker, "seems to inspire the most virulent feelings of outrage," editor Craig Marks says. "It purports to be anti-commercial but reeks of '80s corporate-rock commercialism. It's a real reflection of what practically killed rock music in the '80s."
Also sealing the song's fate were Starship's steep fall from grace as the admired Jefferson Airplane and "the sheer dumbness of the lyrics," Marks says.
Sounded like "We built this city on rock n roll" by Jefferson Airplane.
As M/tch said, it is Jefferson Starship, reinvented for the future. Viva la 1985!
Contractual obligation problems destroyed Creedence and silenced John Fogerty, alas, but they did not silence Grace Slick, and that was much more horrible.
3 ... 2 ... 1 ...
Actually I was waiting for a Mayo joke.
By way of anecdote, an acquaintance who attended Thomas Jefferson High School in NoVa led an abortive campaign to rename the school's mascot the Jefferson Airplanes Starships, or somesuch.
That nog recipe is much like the one used by my family. But, we pour the eggnog into containers (the recipe is old and specifies clay jars) and let it sit in a cool/cold cellar for a week or two. Stir it every few days. The idea is to let it mellow and have the flavors blend (or some other chemical reaction). With all that booze it is reasonably safe.
Surgeon General's Warning: Eggnog is so tasty to drink that it is easy to drink lots of it. Beware of severe eggnog hangovers.
It boggles the mind that any rock stars of the 60s would still be in a condition to put out a new album in 1985. The most talented and dignified had long since died of drug overdoses at that point.
In a bid to recapture some of their former glory and latch on to the craze for old-timey music of the late 90s, the band later reformed as Jefferson Canoe.
Shut up about the fairies. They're not Disney-cute, and by all accounts, they've been known to be quite actively malevolent. "Have you ever seen a fairy or such like?" asked Yeats of an old man of Sligo. "Amn't I annoyed with them" was the reply.
I've heard their new album is being marketed under the band name The Jefferson Little Rascal Brand Scooters.
256: The album's name is Surrealistic Memory Foam Adjustable Sleep Mattress.
251: Then they did a retro-collab with Aerosmith and called it Jefferson Canoe and Tyler Too.
Oh, 257 is genius, and makes up for all the dogfucking.
Jefferson Dirigible: a Ron Paul pep band.
Mayo be pleased he didn't say Aïoli?
Mayo Thompson, founder of The Red Krayola!!!
My family's recipe for eggnog. I believe this is from the 1st or 2nd edition of Fannie Farmer.
Make at least a week before serving so that it will mellow.
Beat until stiff
12 egg whites
Beat in
1/2 cup sugar
Beat until very light
12 egg yolks
1 cup sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
Combine the egg mixtures and stir until thoroughly blended. Add
1 quart heavy cream
1 quart milk
1 quart bourbon whiskey
Beat well. Add
1 cup rum
[a little bit of cognac is nice here too]
Pour into a gallon jug. (Put the extra in a quart jar.) Store in a cool cellar. [stir occaisionally during the week.] Shake or stir thoroughly before serving. Ladle from a big punch bowl into small cups and sprinkle with
Nutmeg
Serves 30 [that's optimistic!]
Since booze is now measured in French units, I wrote down these conversions. 1 quart = .945 liters. 1 cup = .236 liters. Despairing of precision, in practice I always rounded up.
Mayo, may-ay-ay-o
May light come 'cuz I wanna go home
Yes 267 is also genius, even more genius than 257. What explains the difference? Clearly G. doesn't have the same weakness for dogs as Sifu.
As for 266: Do I know you?
At the time I made my first Jefferson Airplane comment, I really believed that We Built This City was from Volunteers of America, a really horrible album ca. 1971. I was merging two completely distinct forms of horribleness almost two decades apart. My critical acumen must be called into question.
274: So happens that I found Volunteers today while looking for something and gave it a play. And actually I quite like it. Then and now.
271: The People of Yore were so good at foreplanning their drunken revels (see also Ratafia). I stand (just barely) in awe .
We Built This City was released by Starship. All connection to JA had been carefully expunged.
Shut up about the fairies. They're not Disney-cute, and by all accounts, they've been known to be quite actively malevolent. "Have you ever seen a fairy or such like?" asked Yeats of an old man of Sligo. "Amn't I annoyed with them" was the reply.
I thought the fairies were good and the brownies were bad.
Stormcrow is beyond the pale, now and forever. Shun him, my children. No offense against Stormcrow can be called a sin.
279: Beyond the Pale? But I'm not even Irish.
And yes, like all JA albums after Surrealistic Pillow, Volunteers is quite spotty, but overall I like it. I will note that I have never claimed nor been known for my sophisticated musical taste.
It also has a spot in my heart from once hearing the song Volunteers live with a blanket held up to my eyes to ward off the tear gas during a particularly tumultuous concert. (Slick and I think most of the band got arrested after the show.)
271 - Wait, md. Eating raw eggs is one thing. Letting raw eggs sit around for a week is another. That sounds like a recipe for disaster.
And on the egg front, LittleBro decided to make gobs of deviled eggs today. Yumm.
Why do you think md won't drink any himself?
Heh heh. It was the hangovers that got me. Plus the blackouts. Plus all the other booze throughout the year. And the shame and despair.
Sifu will back me on this, sitting in a cool cellar doesn't hurt at all. But I can cheat and use my fridge. I think I will do that. Just a matter of using more and smaller containers.
The funny thing about homemade eggnog is that it doesn't look yellow enough compared to the commercial stuff.
"Is it too late for a 'To Di!'?"
Certainly not. She hasn't been here for hours, and that hasn't stopped us.
Aw, thanks guys. When the site crashed, so did I. Slept and slept and slept. Feeling a bit better now that I'm rested, but saudade that I missed the toast in real time. (Credit foolishmortal for the new word -- if I use it two more times, it will be mine!)
I think I shall whip up some Sifu Egg Nog this morning to bring with me to my brother's birthday celebration tonight. (He'll still be hung over, so the rest can mellow until Christmas Day.) For those with salmonella concerns, Alton Brown (Food Network) talks about pasteurized eggs all the time. Haven't ever seen them myself, but haven't really looked.
Meanwhile, the NYT is trying to pass Roquefort and Cedar off as delectable eggnog ingredients. Fie, times, fie!
285: Cedar-planked eggnog is what you get when you ask a trendy Soho bartender "to come up with his own interpretation".
Di, your "friend" is being wicked. I am very, very sorry that people around you are behaving so meanly. My best to you.
Di I want an egg nog update! Are you passed out already? It can be a bit strong.
Egg nog update: I got tired of separating eggs and decided I was halving the recipe. Good damn thing, because even at half I was pushing the capacity for (a) the bowl of egg whites and (b) the bowl of egg yolks and liquor. I third bowl was worked in to be able to combine. But very, very good. And very, very strong. A good gallon's worth is stashed in the fridge for Christmas consumption. Maybe not a complete cure for what ails me, but certainly some numbing relief. Next time I make it, I'm going with the quarter recipe, though.
Yeah it does kind of make an enormous quantity. I should have mentioned that.
We're having a small holiday party right now. My roommate shunned the making of eggnog for store-bought. Our guests seem to be enjoying the mix nonetheless, but I'm looking forward to trying the real deal on Saturday.
And not that I'd mind having that enormous quantity as an end product at all -- just need to buy some bigger bowls, I guess. And convince Rory that separating 16 eggs is Fun!
Oh, and went with the Jim Beam on Bourbon and some brandy of unmemorable name that my mom had lying around.
'I'll be bringing about a gallon of the nog. I hope Sifu makes his batch too. Mine is mainly a bourbon and rum. Maybe a drop or two of brandy.
I don't have punch bowls, so a Tupperware pitcher has to do it for me.
w-lfs-n's task is to be the hipster mixologist.