Re: Nailed

1

Pacing!


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 1:35 PM
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I do like me some expensive sandwiches, it's true.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 1:36 PM
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funny, we do not refer to white people as whites, we call them 'yellow' referring to blonde hair i guess and it does not have any derogatory meaning, just you know different hair


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 1:49 PM
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For instance the median age of divorce for white men is 30.5 and 29 for women.

Isn't the median age of marriage ~25 and ~28?


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 1:53 PM
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3- Do all your white people have blonde hair?
4- Starter marriages?


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 1:57 PM
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not all of course, but certainly of lighter colour than black hair, so the definition is 'yellow head' - shar tolgoit, to be exact


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:03 PM
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The Obama picture is priceless.


Posted by: baa | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:05 PM
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Got as far as natural medicine, and breathed a sigh of relief. I hate that shit.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:07 PM
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Have they already done NPR?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:10 PM
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Have they already done NPR?

Slightly broader, #44 - Public Radio.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:16 PM
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Sort of.

I'm close enough (aspirationally, mostly) to this to cringe a tiny bit, but *none* of the very white white people I work with would see much of themselves in that list. In fact, the white people at work would be pretty suspicious of anyone who matched more than 40% of those cultural markers. And these are urban/suburban, mostly-educated, middle-class-and-rising white Germano-Scando-Irish Minnesotans. How much whiter can you get than that?

The website is really about white people who embody the rootless cosmopolitan ideal.


Posted by: minneapolitan | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:19 PM
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The website is really about white people who embody the rootless cosmopolitan ideal.

Well, obviously. See, for instance, the comment that the wrong kind of white people like Dane Cook.

90% of the (white) authors of personals ads in my age group on craigslist and nerve would presumably see themselves in this site.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:23 PM
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There's an odd bit on the blog where the opposition to 'white people' is 'poor people'. I wonder who the people writing it are.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:25 PM
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12 is right. Obviously, "white" doesn't mean "white" here, but it's funnier that way. "White" means the 20-, 30- and maybe 40-something urban/coastal professional class.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:30 PM
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"White" means the 20-, 30- and maybe 40-something urban/coastal professional class.

I.e., us.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:33 PM
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It's almost guaranteed that if some Columbian drug lord can start offering "organic" cocaine, he'll be the richest guy ever.

Bwahahahahahaha. This whole site is awesome. I conclude that it is written by a graduate student.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:35 PM
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16: a graduate student who reads Crooked Timber:

Perhaps after many years people's attitudes would change to the extent that you might get offered organically produced cocaine sourced to various micro-climates in Bolivia on entering a fancy bar. That would be...not terrible.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:37 PM
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From reading the coffee post, particularly as it addresses drinking coffee as a child/teen, I conclude that the writer's sense of 'non-white' is not strongly shaped by Dominicans. Sally drinks some coffee at eight, but it's all about peer pressure from her school friends -- most of her friends have been drinking coffee for a while. (I feel vaguely disconcerted by this, but she likes it and I can't see what harm it could do, so I let her.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:40 PM
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Almost everyone I know is really into at least one of the things I saw listed on the front page. The more I read the more I feel an almost overwhelming desire to weep hot, purgative tears.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:42 PM
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Hot, purgative tears will be the next entry.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:43 PM
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Another hallmark of white people that would fit well on that page is that they are embarrassed to find out that they have distinctive features in common.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:49 PM
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It's true, it's true. We're so lame.


Posted by: Homer Simpson | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:51 PM
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22: *sob*


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:51 PM
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23 to 20, not 22.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:52 PM
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Umm. I don't care for sushi. I haven't been divorced. Although I make an occasional exception (present company, and all that), I'm not terribly fond of lawyers. I drive a (12-year old) Jaguar. What colour am I?


Posted by: jim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:58 PM
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The colour of someone who can't read comment 12, I think.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 2:59 PM
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24: And here I was thinking my Simpsons quote had really touched you.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:00 PM
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It's true, it's true. We're so lame.

This was my reaction as well.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:02 PM
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I look forward to the entry on lap swimming.


Posted by: Megan | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:03 PM
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Is there an entry on using British slang? I say this as someone who has used both "BOFF" and "TOSH" in Scrabulous over the last two days.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:06 PM
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what i recalled reading the vintage post
so there was again a tv show in Japan that discussed a letter from a female viewer
she was asking a question how to handle a difficult situation with her boyfriend being on the verge of break-up
he had vintage jeans from 1950ies which was although very expensive, very dirty too, filth of 50 yrs! of his wearing and somebody else's before him, so she couldn't stand it and did a laundry thus ruining its vintage cost
the verdict was do not wash your boyfriend's vintage jeans


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:06 PM
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-a


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:07 PM
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31: See! Not just white people!


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:20 PM
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31,32:
read -> Returns a cryptic free verse poem illustrating a Central Asian perspective on some aspect of popular culture.

read -a -> 'read' without Central Asian specificity.

33: That is to be expected given #58 - Japan.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:34 PM
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33 thanks for the CD, beautiful music, i like it
just may i note that white people on that blog totally usurp many things i like too
i tried to be a vegetarian, for example, because i was doing experiments at work and just couldn't stand to look at something meaty, thank gods now work on cell cultures only
and the meat in Japan has some different flavour which i can't eat too, so out of necessity became a vegetarian and liked it! with some sad health consequences though


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:39 PM
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LB made me wonder: what number is "being down with the gente."


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:40 PM
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That blog is sort of idiotic. Oh, snap, says the straw man, that's because you see yourself in it. No, I say, that's not why.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 3:49 PM
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Ben speaks the truth about the personals population.

Despite my class aspirations, I think I'm culturally still too "white ethnic" or "working class." Too much of an autodidact in some areas, impatient in others.

Whenever I need to buy wine, I always get the same kind of Chilean wine that one of my ex-girlfriends took a half hour to pick out. I'm not going to tell what it is, because I don't want anyone to steal it.


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:03 PM
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#68!! Support your local divorce lawyer!!!


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:10 PM
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36: number 20.


Posted by: Barbar | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:11 PM
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I think that blog is idiotic, see myself in it, but don't think I think it's idiotic because I see myself in it.

1) There's actually something a little fucked about equating white with Stereotypical Rootless Cosmopolitan, not just because some white people are not SRCs, but also because some SRC's aren't white. It disappears non-whites from (one segment of) the middle class.

2) There's something additionally fucked about the attitude that since "white" is the opposite of "poor" and "white" = superior left winger that "poor" must mean right wing.

3) Oh, look. You can catalog people by their political views and consumer tastes. This is news? Not everything has to be news, I guess, but if it's not news it should perhaps be funny. You could do that with any group, and it would either come off racist or as the sort of faux reverential exoticizing of the supposed salt of the earth that David Brooks specializes in. In fact, that blog is one half of a David Brooks column, complete with the attitude that those decadent coastal elites are shallow and empty in their aspirations, and the invitation to punish oneself for liking yoga or sushi or biking or kitchen appliances.*

*all of which are fantastic elements of life. Spare time and material comforts are fanfuckingtastic if you ask me.


Posted by: Every(white)man | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:20 PM
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Excepting Public Radio and Indie Rock, maybe, I love most of the things White People Like. And why not? Bicycles, sandwiches, sushi, Apple products, and the pursuit of an authentic life lived vicariously through the poor and alien are all very good things, says I.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:21 PM
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(My significant other just asked me whether I wanted to pick from the 15 varieties of tea we had on offer, or whether I would prefer to have my tea chosen for me.)


Posted by: Every(white)man | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:22 PM
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the invitation to punish oneself for liking yoga or sushi or biking or kitchen appliances.

Yeah, the blog writer is probably just full of stupid white guilt.


Posted by: Barbar | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:22 PM
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40: Thanks. In light of #41, what # is "Atrophied sense of humor"?

I like the web site. It's funny.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:26 PM
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I read the blog as a sincere attempt to help non-whites get along with (a certain kind of) white people. Why this bashing of someone who's trying to promote cross-cultural understanding?


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:26 PM
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I thought it was very funny, that the reduction of 'white' to 'aspirational cosmopolitan young person' was intentional (because 'white' has arguably always really meant 'people suitably like us' rather than 'essential qualities based on color of skin and ethnic heritage'), and that the faux-anthropological aspect of it was the best part, especially on the things you should say around white people if you want to fit in. Help! I'm being surrounded! MY WINE IS FROM CHILE!


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:26 PM
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The more I read of this the less funny it became. I can't quite put my finger on why. I tried to imagine Chris Rock doing a version of some of the entries, and that seemed like it would be funny. Needs more anger and less easy condescension.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:27 PM
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It seems a lot stupider than it is because it says "white people" instead of "yuppies" or equivalent. That's why it annoys me. Like #41.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:28 PM
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47: I mean why not? we're all free, white and 21, right?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:28 PM
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That is to say, there were thousands of things exactly like this written 20 years ago about "yuppies". Not a sign of progress towards equality that "white people" is the new word for "yuppies".


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:29 PM
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MY WINE IS FROM CHILE! DO NOT ATTACK.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:29 PM
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I read the blog as a sincere attempt to help non-whites get along with (a certain kind of) white people.

A sort of Guide Blanc as it were.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:30 PM
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I'm kind of with Every(white)man. Reason (1) is part of what was bothering me. Actually, all of what E(w)m said was bothering me. I'd add that there's something screwy, in a way I'm not happy with, with racialising the difference between David Brooks' BoBos and everyone else -- if you're not a latte-sipping-co-ed-softball-playing recycler, you're not really white. And I'm not all that far off the lifestyle described, but I'm not close enough that I'm thinking, "It's funny because it's true!"


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:31 PM
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Oh, that crossed with a lot of stuff that was very sensible, and that probably would have made 54 different if I'd read them first.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:33 PM
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We regularly drink wine from Argentinia. Does that count?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:36 PM
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Oh my gawd. I hope this thread becomes entry #70.

Cala's right: it's "white" as defined by Friends fanfic. That's the conceit around which each entry is built, but I don't think you're supposed to read every entry in order to understand some larger message. It's like the "50 most loathsome" lists: some picks are funny, some are not, so you should focus on the funny ones.


Posted by: SomeCAll | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:36 PM
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Yep, the backlash has begun. Ogged, better take the whole post down before you get too embararssed.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:36 PM
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"embararssed" s/b "Embraer-arsed"


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:37 PM
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OT:

Why didnt anyone tell me that Mr. Brooks was so good?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:37 PM
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57: Me, obviously.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:39 PM
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Maybe we can start ironically liking the site?


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:40 PM
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62: Are you talking about this site or the linked one?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:48 PM
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Oh, it's funny, it's just a complicated enough joke that I really want to think through it for awhile to be sure I know exactly who's being made fun of and whether I'm comfortable making fun of them in that way.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:49 PM
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63: Are you saying you have some sort of unironic interest in Unfogged? Silencio, old man.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:50 PM
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this "white people" site gives me ideas. I could go for biking to the beach where I'll sit reading my book while enjoying a dinner of organic sushi and absent-mindidly throwing the frisbee from my dog.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:52 PM
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64—jeez, lb, let your hair down once in a while.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:52 PM
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Do I win a prize for that?


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:53 PM
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I've liked Unfogged ironically all along -- way before it was cool to do so, may I add. (And I'm being ironic about caring about doing things before they were cool, too.)


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:53 PM
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I disliked "Things White People Like" before it was popular.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:54 PM
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This post courtesy of Mr. Whole Foods.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:54 PM
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I was being knowingly ironic about caring about doing things back when people were unaware that they were ironic about caring about doing things.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:55 PM
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Tweety gets it right. The site is funny for the second or so it takes to realize that it's really "stuff that people who like this particular stuff like."

Plus, hating on stand mixers is cheap and hackneyed. I got up at 5:30 to make a cake, a task that would have been a lot easier if I hadn't sprayed frosting all over the place with our crappy hand mixer. I am now committed to getting a stand mixer, just like all the kitchen geeks at Cook's Illustrated. And I recycle. So bite me.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:55 PM
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Oh, it's funny, it's just a complicated enough joke that I really want to think through it for awhile to be sure I know exactly who's being made fun of and whether I'm comfortable making fun of them in that way.

#56 Lawyers A common characteristic amongst white people is the need to over analyze things

You, LB they are making fun of you.


Posted by: CJB | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:55 PM
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I like the attitude of "see how you like when I stereotype you based on your race".

How about some suggestions for future episodes?


Posted by: gdr | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:55 PM
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typing erros in 66 are due to simultaneaous listening to "A Prairie Home Companion". Is that on the white people site yet?


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:55 PM
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67: Nah, if I maintain this level of uptightness, the lump of coal I have up my ass is sure to turn into a diamond any minute now, and then I'll never have to work again.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:56 PM
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I liked the first entry at "Things White People Like," but they haven't done anything good since then.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:56 PM
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74 wins.

Also, I've come to realize that as a white person, my lack of self-consciousness about my nose is a great unacknowledged advantage. Jews, Iranians, Michael Jackson, even Andy Warhol go through their adolescence and young adulthood constantly wondering if they should alter their nose for no other reason than to present a vaguely "whiter" gestalt to everyone who ever looks at them.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:57 PM
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Oh check it out: there's even a link I could have used if I'd read a few more pages before snarking at Ogged.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:58 PM
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my lack of self-consciousness about my nose

Ned? No one wanted to bring it up, but...


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:58 PM
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The site is funny for the second or so it takes to realize that it's really "stuff that people who like this particular stuff like."

But people who like that particular stuff could stand to have it brought home to them that they're often rather ridiculous and unselfaware. Not you, of course, Jesus—never you—but I'm sure that you could scout out a few people in Portland fucking Oregon who are ripe targets.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:58 PM
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the lump of coal I have up my ass is sure to turn into a diamond any minute now, and then I'll never have to work again.

Have you ever tried to sell a diamond?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 4:59 PM
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83. Are you thinking of Snatch? It's not always that difficult.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:00 PM
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I liked the site, in part because of its tone, like "Here's a good way to get a white person going so you won't have to talk and they'll think well of you." I wish I'd read it before I ever attended dinner parties in Park Slope, as I would have gotten along a lot better.

Yeah, it's annoying that this is all associated with "whiteness," especially since most of it has little relation to, e.g., my family. But defining whiteness is a good thing to do, because otherwise, the only racial descriptions that exist are of minorities. You think all black people see themselves in descriptions of "black culture," for example? And yet there's a lot of pressure from all sides to conform superficially to some aspects of racialized stereotypes because it makes it easier to get along.

Most of the things mentioned on that blog are things that I quite often pretend to care about (or at least don't express my hatred for) just to get through conversations with people. I'm guessing this is true for a lot of individuals who don't totally fit in with the most dominant version of their own culture.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:00 PM
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The lump of coal in the snatch might take longer to become a diamond.


Posted by: Auto-banned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:01 PM
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I'm always thinking of snatch, Michael. Occasionally, though, I also think of decades-old articles from the Atlantic Monthly.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:01 PM
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Which apparently they've now put up on their own site, which didn't used to be so.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:02 PM
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Most of the things mentioned on that blog are things that I quite often pretend to care about (or at least don't express my hatred for) just to get through conversations with people.

Co-ed sports and co-op shopping, of course, you're sincerely all over.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:02 PM
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89: Oh sure, some of the stuff was dead-on about me, but I found most fascinating the posts about the shit that I am often made to feel really really bad about not participating in.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:04 PM
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I always underestimate the humorlessness of the commentariat. Probably because Middle-Easterners are naturally optimistic.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:04 PM
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90: How bad do you really feel about not doing things that only people with money can really do?


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:05 PM
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I'm sure that you could scout out a few people in Portland fucking Oregon who are ripe targets

I'm too busy screaming at them to learn how to merge in traffic (from behind the wheel of our Prius, of course) to focus on their other faults.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:07 PM
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Am I the only one going through this site hoping to find something cool I haven't heard of before?

White people enjoy activities that cost a lot of money and require expensive clothes.

God this is so true.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:07 PM
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Well, people do try to make one feel bad about that stuff, anyway, and it's socially acceptable to do so. Often in those situations, I've tried turning it around and trying to make them feel bad for assuming privilege, but this should go on some list of "Ways you are not allowed to make people feel bad."


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:07 PM
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the lump of coal I have up my ass is sure to turn into a diamond any minute now, and then I'll never have to work again

And if the diamond trade doesn't work out, LB, there's always the coffee bean business.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:07 PM
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Probably because Middle-Easterners are naturally optimistic.

"we will take down the U.S.A., we will take down the U.S.A., we will take down the U.S.A...."


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:08 PM
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What things have people tried to make you feel bad about, AWB?


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:09 PM
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The one about co-ed sports was really good. And that's one of two that I've read. I jus don't like the "white people" framing one bit.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:09 PM
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Probably because Middle-Easterners are naturally optimistic.

Randomly: Has Iran always been considered part of the Middle East? Is Turkey in the Middle East?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:10 PM
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Probably because Middle-Easterners are naturally optimistic.

Good thing, too, 'cause fucking up the middle-east is another thing white people like.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:12 PM
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98: Oh, stuff like not having traveled. I don't even have a passport. This is because I'm dirt poor. But there is no level of poverty at which a white person can't be faulted for not having tried hard enough to travel, because anyone who hasn't traveled is obviously afraid of other cultures or something.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:12 PM
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Randomly: Has Iran always been considered part of the Middle East? Is Turkey in the Middle East?

I think 'Asia Minor' is due for a revival.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:13 PM
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91. Meh. Some of the entries are pretty funny. Most of them are a bit lame, some worse. In pursuit of teh funny it often overshoots into forced.

I think it intentionally mistargets `white' towards youth, privilege, urban aspirations. Why? Because it's safe to hate on. If you characterized `white' as meaning wearing 44 inch waist jeans from Walmart while you watch `American Idle' on your 56inch plasma TV and eat club-pack hamburgers in a slightly run down rancher with bad carpet ... would people feel it's safe to laugh?

Not that this is accurate either.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:14 PM
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If you characterized `white' as meaning wearing 44 inch waist jeans from Walmart while you watch `American Idle' on your 56inch plasma TV and eat club-pack hamburgers in a slightly run down rancher with bad carpet ... would people feel it's safe to laugh?

Not a fan of The Simpsons or King of the Hill, I gather.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:16 PM
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anyone who hasn't traveled is obviously afraid of other cultures or something

Just ignorant and narrow-minded, I think.

Of course, the English all have passports in a desperate bid to find better weather and food.

Is a ratchet screwdriver on the list? That's my favourite thing today. (That, and a health service that did indeed today provide real live house call from a real live doctor.)


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:18 PM
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107

Not a fan of The Simpsons or King of the Hill, I gather.

Gustavo Arellano has argued that the Simpsons are hispanic.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:18 PM
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105: You think that would work for the blog? I don't. Could be wrong.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:18 PM
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Barack Obama. Because white people are afraid that if they don't like him that they will be called racist.

Funny because it's true!


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:22 PM
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Is there an entry about how white people love thinking of themselves as exceptions and/or being defensive about their whiteness?

Look, the *reason* the stupid blog defines whiteness in a particularly class/education inflected way is because whiteness *is* a class/educationally inflected term, for god's sake. Blah blah cultural capital, blah blah social and economic power, blah blah the smug privilege that allows one to worry a Great Deal about one's moral purity while comfortably swaddled in incredible wealth and safety. That's kind of the *point* of "white"ness.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:22 PM
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102: You're right, that definitely happens. And travel ends up suffused with a whole bunch of meaning. Conversation I had with a friend last year:

Friend: Where do you want to go in the next year?
Me: Well, I'm going to Seattle to see D___, and another friend of mine just moved to Chicago, so I'll probably try to visit her. And I'll be back in Berlin again for the summer. And I may try to go home to Missouri more than once this year to spend more time with my parents.
Friend: But where do you want to travel?

She couldn't believe I don't have a running list of travel destinations.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:22 PM
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In-group humor among the relatively privileged is always a dicey proposition. It had better be very, very good*. In this case the identification of "white people" with the target demographic adds a small degree of displacement humor which is not sustainable. It wears particularly poorly in the ones where the behavior discussed is contrasted with that of the vast majority of actual white people in America.

*I think National Lampoon pulled it off for a few years in the early '70s (white college males... maybe only because I was one ...), but it faded. Probably just a variant of the "everything was better when I was 12" argument.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:22 PM
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But ... didn't you give her just such a list?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:23 PM
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108: I think so, if you could somehow indicate affection. Something like that is going on at that blog: per Cala, the author is, somehow, among the named. If it's self-loathing, it's not deep enough to make us think he (or she) doesn't like himself (and by extension, his readers).

If there's any issue with the joke, it's that you pretty much have to be of that cohort to get the joke. I'd bet Whole Foods and the like look pretty good to people who can't afford it and have no real likelihood of being able afford it.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:24 PM
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114: Yeah -- it's got a bit of a self-congratulatory air about it.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:26 PM
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White people like to discuss the differences between one group of white people and another group of white people.


Posted by: Gdr | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:27 PM
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110: Yeah, but it's a mess -- some of the attributes are really incredibly narrow. Others are just badly overwritten. Some are really funny though.

114.b is probably true.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:29 PM
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it's got a bit of a self-congratulatory air about it.

What could be more "white"?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:32 PM
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106: English all have passports in a desperate bid to find better weather and food

I think you mean, "English white people...".


Posted by: Gdr | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:34 PM
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it's a mess -- some of the attributes are really incredibly narrow. Others are just badly overwritten.

The horror!!!


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:34 PM
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What could be more "white"?

The time I had sex with Ogged. I really didn't want too, but was full of white guilt and didn't want to be perceived as racist.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:35 PM
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White people totally hate having their culture anthropologized.


Posted by: gdr | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:35 PM
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but was full of white guilt

I've never heard it called "guilt" before, but I like it.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:37 PM
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114: I'd bet Whole Foods and the like look pretty good to people who can't afford it and have no real likelihood of being able afford it.

I used to shop at the First Church of Whole Foods, merely because I could walk there in a block and a half, and it wasn't significantly more expensive than the mainline St. Lund ELCA grocery a mile up the street. There are some interesting class dynamics that go on there. The fact that the clerks were about 70% drawn from the art-school-but-not-cute-enough-to-work-in-a-bar lumpen proletariat, and 30% from the usual work-in-a-grocery-'cause-its-the-best-thing-I-was-offered meant that the rich bastards could shop there and be snooty with a little more obliviousness to their own stinking privilege than at the older, unionized fancy groceries, or the sexually promiscuous co-ops which constituted the alternatives.
But you did see some actual working-class and lower-middle-class people there too. It's difficult to keep them out, you see. On the one hand, it must be a somewhat more pleasant experience than going to the big box, as it is for everyone. On the other hand, I'm sure you get the hairy eyeball if you're Black and wear hip-hop clothes just like you would anywhere else.


Posted by: minneapolitan | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:39 PM
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I don't know, in general "Is it funny? Why or why not?" is sort of an interesting question.

I find it funny in an 'okay (shrug)' kind of way, chiefly because it's so cliched. Some very funny moments (about the reaction to recycling: "Where's the recycling? Oh, you don't recycle? Um ..."), some not so much (not a lot of coops I've been to meet the description given in item #48).

What irks is probably that several of the dozen entries I read trade on the notion that white people do things simply in order to feel virtuous: this is just a variant on making fun of so-called liberal guilt. A complicated topic.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:39 PM
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The horror!!!

No horror. Just no funny.

B, I really don't understand what you're getting at. The descriptions on that page are, to me, very representative of a bunch of people I've met. I can recognize people in a lot of them, myself and others.

It's just not a group that skews particularly white.

It's a group that is vastly less white than others I've known. Not even close. Which is what I was pointing out.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:39 PM
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You people are wrong. Ogged is WHITE! The Persians were the original Aryans.

Aryan. White! Ask David Duke.

You're welcome, Ogged, I know that you're too polite to explain this to people.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:41 PM
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Soup has friends who aren't white, everyone.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:42 PM
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127: But are Lurs considered Persians?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:43 PM
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I'm sorry (white people like apologies), but really, every time someone uses the word "Persian" I think "cat."


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:44 PM
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Wait, you're saying Ogged doesn't have a luxuriantly fluffy coat and a pushed-in face? My image of him is shattered.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:45 PM
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I'm sorry (white people like apologies), but really, every time someone uses the word "Persian" I think "cat."

Maz Jobrani strikes again!


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:47 PM
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Since the beginning of time Persians have yearned to destroy the sun.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:48 PM
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Easy targets + ironically bullshit racial angle = comedy gold!

Seriously this site is like reading a fortune cookie and going "oh that is so true.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:48 PM
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I don't know if the demographic actually skews 'white', and probably not, but again, that's the funny bit. What sort of things construct whiteness? Being an uptight motherfucker with a stand mixer, that's what. Has nothing to do with what you look like.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:48 PM
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yeah, that's exactly what I was trying to say B.

Maybe the sub-culture that website paints looks like home to you B, I don't know.

It reminds me of a bunch of people I now know. Sure, many white. But many not. All of them, though, way out in left field of what I'd think of as `white people' culture. Maybe I'm just getting the same thing AWB is talking about.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:49 PM
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Soup has friends who aren't white, everyone.

You can't get much whiter than that.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:49 PM
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I actually love my stand mixer. But I'm Not One of Those People, because it lives in a cupboard, rather than on prominent display, and because I do actually use it. So there.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:49 PM
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every time someone uses the word "Persian" I think "cat."

Well, not "cat," exactly....


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:50 PM
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Meow!


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:51 PM
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I really want a stand mixer, but I have nowhere to display or store it.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:52 PM
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Being an uptight motherfucker with a stand mixer, that's what. Has nothing to do with what you look like.

'Zactly. Cala and I are launching a war against stand mixers! Who will join us?

For gawd's sake, it's not meant as social commentary.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:52 PM
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132: I had to look up this Jobrani dude. He has an "ethnically Indian" wife. I bet Ogged disapproves.

Soup, I just think that you're being unnecessarily defensive and humorless. (I'm secretly thrilled at finding something besides feminism that puts Sifu on the defensive, though.) Just doing my trolly homework is all.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:53 PM
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141: Betrayal! What could be more "white"?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:53 PM
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I'm going to sum up that blog, ready?

White people generally earn more money than other people and are often shallow and self-conscious about it.

Nailed, my peeps!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:53 PM
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In 1984, some TV commentator was baiting Jesse Jackson, saying that his support lay in the black vote. Jackson pointed to some Virginia counties he'd carried and insisted, "They white."

And my initial reaction to the site was, I'm white.

But, you know, the site grows on you. There is a culture, an American culture, that the site captures. I'm not part of it. I didn't come here 'til I was 21; I wasn't naturalized until I was 30, so I come to the culture from outside it. But I recognize the culture. It's more an upper middle class culture than a white culture -- Obama is, after all, part of it: hell, he's a lawyer with a thousand bottle wine cellar -- but the upper middle class *is* mostly white.


Posted by: jim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:53 PM
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141: You didn't get a stand mixer for a wedding present? That's just wrong, man.

Why the fuck didn't we, the unfoggedetariat, buy Cala a stand mixer? We totally suck.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:54 PM
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145: Omigod! That is, like, so true! It can be #71.

(Hanging there. Asking for it.)


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:55 PM
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soup biscuit gets it right. When I was growing up, 99% of the people I knew were white, and none of them were described by this site. Now that I live in the city, I know lots of people described by this site, and maybe 75% of them are white. I refute you thus!


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:55 PM
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Sifu, you *know* it isn't about the money. Because there are *plenty* of us right here on this site who are Not Rich but who nonetheless ride bikes/recycle/get into the Slow Foods movement/etc.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:56 PM
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143: Well shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.

No worries, I just didn't find it that funny, after a few. Just sort of formulaic. And I did suspect it was intentionally targeted at people who are both easy and safe to slag on, which weakens it. I certainly didn't see it as social commentary.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:57 PM
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Because there are *plenty* of us right here on this site who are Not Rich but who nonetheless are uptight motherfuckers with stand mixers.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:58 PM
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I'm sorry, but if you guys really don't realize that that site is totally describing us, the Unfoggedtariat, with our long comment threads about petty bullshit, then y'all are way more humorless than even I am rumored to be.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:58 PM
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I am an uptight motherfucker without a stand mixer or a bicycle. Nevertheless!


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 5:59 PM
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152: Exactly. Now you're getting it, Soup! Next you'll admit that you secretly luuuurve Whole Foods!


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:00 PM
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I'm sorry, but if you guys really don't realize that that site is totally describing us, the Unfoggedtariat, with our long comment threads about petty bullshit, then y'all are way more humorless than even I am rumored to be.

"And I did suspect it was intentionally targeted at people who are both easy and safe to slag on, which weakens it."

We're not disagreeing here.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:01 PM
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I haven't got any of this stuff.

I practice a form of Higher Whiteness, which that site is not yet ready to understand.


Posted by: felix | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:01 PM
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White people dislike to be stereotyped, especially if the stereotype is inaccurate.


Posted by: gdr | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:01 PM
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155: First I've got to get a stand mixer. Through the wonders of consumer capitalism, my dream is achievable.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:02 PM
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By the way, NOT THAT ANY OF YOU ASKED, you assholes, but I haven't been around much this week because I have been so loving riding around town on my new bike! I even sent Ogged a snotty email about how I was Saving The Earth.

(Y'all better believe I'm wearing sunblock while biking around Ventura. Gotta protect my sensitive skin from premature aging, y'know.)


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:03 PM
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Why the fuck didn't don't we, the unfoggedetariat, buy Cala Jesus McQueen a stand mixer? We totally suck.

What a great idea! It would be mighty white of you.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:03 PM
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Yeah that's hard. Look at those ovdreducated types! They totally navel-gaze! Oh, snap! Satire any more toothless and it would be breastfeeding.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:04 PM
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"And I did suspect it was intentionally targeted at people who are both easy and safe to slag on, which weakens it."

Oh, neighbor, please. Unlike the Modern Love threads or the political threads or what have you.

Is there an entry about how white people love spf factors? B/c if there isn't, there totally should be.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:04 PM
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162 is correct.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:05 PM
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What bike did you end up getting?


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:05 PM
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150: I keep on trying to pin down what's giving me an off feeling about this: is it that it's making fun of hippies by accusing them of being overprivileged and phony about social concerns? The entries really aren't mocking just privileged white people, they're particularly aimed at recycling-world-music-listening-fair-trade-coffee-drinking-bike-riding hippies.

And making fun of hippies is cool, and I think it's why Megan picked this up, because she's squarely in the crosshairs. But I don't like the "Pretending to care about poor people/the environment/other cultures unequivocally establishes what a self-centered clod you are. I, the writer, am better and more sensitive than you are in racial terms because I don't share your faked concern." There's something creepy about that move.

If it were making fun of affluent young hippies directly, I wouldn't be unhappy. But taking left-wing political positions as proof of how hopelessly insensitively white you are smells bad to me.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:06 PM
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I'm sorry, but if you guys really don't realize that that site is totally describing us, the Unfoggedtariat, with our long comment threads about petty bullshit, then y'all are way more humorless than even I am rumored to be.

I think everyone gets that, so you're still the champ.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:06 PM
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Jesus, you gotta have a major life event in order to earn a stand mixer.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:08 PM
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Mmm. Not so much on the hippies, just the faux-hippie these-jeans-were-made-with-slave-labor-but-my-coffee-is-fair-trade. Pretty privileged. A lot of it was social climbing consumption, too; home renovations, vintage furniture, etc.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:08 PM
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166 gets it exactly right. I erred on my first reading of the site, because it's not just making fun of rich people, it's making fun of people who care about things from the point of view of the down-to-earth people who realize that caring about things is bullshit. And, of course, presuming that the people who care about things are all rich people who should be scorned independently of whether they care about things, which is even worse.

Is there an entry about how white people love spf factors? B/c if there isn't, there totally should be.

Now that's one that would actually be specific to white people. And Koreans.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:08 PM
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But taking left-wing political positions as proof of how hopelessly insensitively white you are smells bad to me.

I think your claim that white people smell bad is much more offensive than anything I saw on that site.

I cannot believe people are complaining some random blog is not sufficiently nuanced to be...gawd knows? Truly funny? Sufficiently appropriate that we can laugh?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:09 PM
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LB, she's making fun of social gestures of concern. Not that caring about the poor is bad, but that pretending to care about the poor, as a way of establishing one's own (and one's group's) identity is worthy of mockery. I don't think any of the mockery really points to the underlying thought that *actually* caring about the poor is bad.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:10 PM
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I don't think any of the mockery really points to the underlying thought that *actually* caring about the poor is bad.

I think it sort of takes the assumption that nobody actually cares about the poor, because these people are the closest to actually caring, and they don't care either.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:11 PM
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Not so much on the hippies, just the faux-hippie these-jeans-were-made-with-slave-labor-but-my-coffee-is-fair-trade. Pretty privileged.

Everyone's jeans were made with slave labor.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:12 PM
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I believe that Witt's first words to me were "Damn, this place is white!"


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:12 PM
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nobody actually cares about the poor

And this is, basically, true.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:13 PM
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Everyone's jeans were made with slave labor

But not everyone knows to brag about it.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:13 PM
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169, 172: That's why I don't like the racializing -- it seems to me to make that split, between "making fun of people who care about things" as Ned puts it, and making fun of overprivileged people who only pretend to care about things, hard to to make.

But I don't need to convince anyone, I just wanted to pin down what was bothering me about it, and I got it to my own satisfaction.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:14 PM
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y'all are way more humorless than even I am rumored to be.

rumored?

Satire any more toothless and it would be breastfeedingcocksucking.

(edited to be brought in accord with house style)


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:15 PM
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165: The trek 7200. Which I am so totally loving. Even though the trek bike shop folks were kinda "meh" about me and my cheapo $450 bike purchase. Luckily, there's another, local and independent, bike shop in town, where they are much nicer and don't make me feel stupid. I'm totally going to buy a cup holder for my new bike there next time I ride downtown. Did you know you can get proper cup holders now to hold your latte while you bike around? How awesome is that?!?

166: Semi-fair. I don't think it's hippies per se, though, so much as it is a certain version of affluent educated/professional/u-m-cness. Which there is a *lot* of here in So Cal, and it really is kind of irritating. It *isn't* the kind of grungy hippie thing at all. It's the well off type of person who intends to convert their 2000-sf million dollar home to solar energy, or who buys an entire grass-fed buffalo carcass from Colorado every year and has it shipped down to put in cold storage.

Which sure, is better than not doing it. But it's kind of missing a major point or two. (And yeah, I totally have fantasies about putting in solar panels when we buy a house.)


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:16 PM
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110 has it exactly right

I have been trying to come up with something like "black people are white if they listen to indie rock and vote for clinton" without any implications of UTism. Basically "white" is used here as a descriptor like "square" or "uncool" or "tragically hip"


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:17 PM
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176: A lot of people care about the poor. But hardly anyone does anything about the problem of poverty, because one person's actions are unlikely to have any effect. I guess "white people" are more likely to pretend that what they do in their spare time is actually effective in any way.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:17 PM
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pretending to care about the poor, as a way of establishing one's own (and one's group's) identity is worthy of mockery.

And it certainly is. What's weird is that the group of people who actually appear to be doing this is pretty small.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:18 PM
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I denounce the horrible ethnic stereotyping of my people! No one would say "Black people love fried chicken" so how can they dare say that all white people like Priuses? I've lived among white people my whole life, and I can assure you that white people love all sorts of vehicles, from pick-up trucks to SUVs. My dad, who is so white he is actually The Face of True Power in the US, like European sports cars.

I'm offended!

(And probably pwned.)


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:19 PM
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Oh, and 167, whew. Thanks!


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:20 PM
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Did you know you can get proper cup holders now to hold your latte while you bike around? How awesome white is that?!?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:21 PM
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They make latte-holders for bicycles these days? Okay, that really is white.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:21 PM
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186, 187: Thanks for making that explicit, guys.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:22 PM
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Fuck. Pwned.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:22 PM
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Even though the trek bike shop folks were kinda "meh" about me and my cheapo $450 bike purchase.

A number of years ago before I was "bike aware" I saw a local bike shop with a going out of business sign and wandered in, looking for a go-to-class bike. The daughter of the owner talked to me a bit, but it was quickly ascertained that they were all way more than I wanted to spend. I mentioned something around $100, and she was like "we don't sell those kind of bikes here." Real snotty, I thought.

I thought about making a joke about them going out of business, but decided not to on account of her being like, 8.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:23 PM
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They make latte-holders for bicycles these days? Okay, that really is white.

Better than a Cameback filled with latte.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:23 PM
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No one would say "Black people love fried chicken"

I will say, however, that there are TWO fried chicken places at the big intersection a block away, both of which have bullet-proof glass between the customer and the food. Even though there are a bunch of delicious cheap restaurants nearby, the chicken places are always packed.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:24 PM
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191: No kidding. Can you imagine trying to clean that thing?


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:25 PM
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White people like pwning. And making things explicit.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:25 PM
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It is really hard. A little easier than a mocha.

Vodka helps.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:26 PM
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The first time I ever knowingly set foot in a small city that was majority black, the first thing I saw when crossing into the city limits (on the 71C) was a KFC.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:27 PM
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176 is thoroughly wrong.

You can buy a swell bike for $100.

You know what country's really white? China.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:28 PM
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And omg the site I have open after downloading 6 Wilson books has the Empsons I have been craving my entire life. They're mine! Maybe I'll even read them.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:28 PM
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As far as expensive bikes go, I dropped over 1K on a Cannondale and haven't regretted it for a moment.

I bought it right before my cross-country bike trip (which turned out to be Seattle to Chicago) and have rode it in all kinds of crazy whether for the last 8 years and it is still the smoothest ride around.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:28 PM
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193. the beer cleans out of my camelback pretty easy.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:29 PM
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"Have ridden," Rob. Jesus.

White people are picky about proper grammar.

(Also you people are not *really* going to turn this thread from "defensive white people" into "fried chicken jokes" . . . are you?!?)


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:30 PM
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Buying a bike new is pretty damn white, I'll admit.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:30 PM
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There definitely needs to be an entry about how white people love Camelbacks.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:31 PM
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i love fried chicken so much i want to take behind the middle school and get it pregnant.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:31 PM
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White people like fried chicken.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:31 PM
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i love fried chicken so much i want to take behind the middle school and get it pregnant.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:31 PM
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i love fried chicken so much i want to take behind the middle school and get it pregnant.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:31 PM
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Michael is very white.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:31 PM
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201: oh I was waiting for you to drop a "defensive" in there.

Things women like: shopping! Gossip! Black dick!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:32 PM
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i only pressed "post" once, honest.


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:32 PM
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202: I don't care. I love my new bike and I'm totally thrilled with the whole "women specific design" thing. Finally, riding the goddamn thing doesn't make my fucking back hurt.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:32 PM
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205: I just ordered some for dinner, with collard greens. I should remember not to order greens takeout -- I like them homecooked, but takeout places always make them repulsively salty.

I take no position on what this says about my whiteness level, or about fried chicken as an indication thereof.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:33 PM
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I guess the thing I resent about the site (I still haven't read most of this thread) isn't that me and the rest of the NPR set are being skewered (lord knows we deserve it) but that *we* are considered the essence of whiteness, when we are really a minority of white people. Between the Dane Cook/pick-up truck set and the country club/European sports car set, you have 90% of whiteness. I've always felt like a bit of a race traitor for joining the NPR/prius set. (And, in very white fashion, I've felt pride, even though I had to do very little work.)


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:33 PM
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They make latte-holders for bicycles these days? Okay, that really is white.

A Flat White can be good. Flats are not.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:33 PM
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209: I used the word "defensive" quite a while back, sweetie. I mean Tweety.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:34 PM
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209: actually that's her fourth use of "defensive" in this thread.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:34 PM
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It had been a while; I was jonesing.

Things white people like: swimming! Not having type two diabetes! Being executives!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:36 PM
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I love the crazy salty collard greens, but they are always cooked in bacon fat.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:36 PM
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Jesus, you gotta have a major life event in order to earn a stand mixer.

But I've had so many major life events, and you people haven't given me jack.

OT, thanks to all for cake suggestions. I had to scale back my grand ambitions and consider this year's cake merely a first draft of future cakes. I can recommend the yellow cake recipe (we had significant quantities of yellow cake) from the current Cook's Illustrated, and I owe special thanks to McManlypants for his frosting recommendation. The strawberries were organic, from our local Whole Foods equivalent; this comment was written on an Apple computer. I am gleaming white.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:36 PM
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Things white people like: living in safe neighborhoods! Being able to afford a healthy diet!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:38 PM
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Sifu's humorlessness is unpredictable and full of rage.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:38 PM
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Honkies! Honkies! Honky motherfuckers!

Especially Mr. Aryan.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:39 PM
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Nice cake.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:40 PM
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The strawberries were organic, from our local Whole Foods equivalent

Oh? And just where do you think strawberries of any sort come from in the middle of the winter?

Why are you even using strawberries at all in the middle of the winter? What the fuck is wrong with you?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:40 PM
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As predicted, the strawberries are gigantic, and probably flavorless.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:41 PM
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Nice writing, though.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:41 PM
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Gorgeous lettering. That's always my weak point -- I finish making the cake and frosting it, and then I just scrawl Happy Birthday on it. Impatient.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:42 PM
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I'm about to go to my date. Start your stopwatches.

(White people like dating.)


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:45 PM
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And just where do you think strawberries of any sort come from in the middle of the winter?

Mexico. They were pretty good, actually.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:45 PM
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I scoff.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:46 PM
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Vilfredo Pareto's non-economic works!

Don't mind me


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:46 PM
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This thread is emblematic of why I've scaled back my Unfogged participation -- the place has been overrun by boring, earnest people.


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:48 PM
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pwned very embraerarsingly, sorry.

Things white people like: swimming! Not having type two diabetes! Being executives!

Perfectly spherical red blood cells! Non-ghetto booty!


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:48 PM
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Sorry about that, chief.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:48 PM
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234 to 232.

spherical red blood cells

? Wouldn't that pose a bit of a problem?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:49 PM
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Your departure only makes it easier for them, Kotsko.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:49 PM
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235, it's hyperbole! Whiter than white!


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:53 PM
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||
In case anyone is wondering, if you order an Obama For America T-shirt, a ladies small really means small and the shirt is stretchy so it's a little more like Oboobma for America. If anyone here is about 5'2'' and 110 pounds or so, I have a shirt that will fit you.
|>

White people like blogs.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:54 PM
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238:I want a black velvet painting or a lightup bobblehead statue that cries real tears.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 6:57 PM
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Crap, thanks. I have enough guilt about the fact that it's almost impossible not to participate in oppression of the poor with virtually every step taken.

Sorry, Adam. Self-banned.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:01 PM
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White people like blogs.

And boobs. Keep the shirt, Cala.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:02 PM
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Cala Cala Boobmama. You have my vote.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:09 PM
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KitchenAid mixers blow. Don't fuck around, get a Bosch Universal. 800 watt motor.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:12 PM
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Cala, you should send it to my fiancee. That would be an exciting surprise for her.

Make it a hand-addressed package from Barack Obama himself. Maybe I can convince her that he's sending one to everyone in our state, in preparation for our primary. Like Silvio Berlusconi did with his autobiography.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:13 PM
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Sneering at KitchenAid mixers and recommending German ones instead? Dieter White.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:15 PM
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243: What the hell you mixing? Cement? Uptight concrete motherfucker.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:15 PM
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The shirt looks good. Just a little too Obama Girl.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:16 PM
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Just a little too Obama Girl.

There's too little Obama Girl in the world, Cala. Keep the shirt.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:17 PM
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Seriously, KitchenAid's are nice for wanking around making salad dressings or whipping cream, but for making breads, cookies, etc. the Bosch is much better.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:19 PM
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Besides, real chefs use Hobart Floor Mixers. "Don't fuck around," indeed.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:19 PM
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Hobart Floor Mixers

The picture really needs a human in it for scale.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:21 PM
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KitchenAid's are nice for wanking around making salad dressings or whipping cream, but for making breads, cookies, [insert: "committing genocide,"] etc. the Bosch is much better.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:22 PM
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The picture really needs a human in it for scale.

It's just over five feet high and weighs 905lbs. So imagine Sifu.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:22 PM
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My mom has a kitchen aid and it seemed to work well for cookies and cakes. We never made bread.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:24 PM
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Or commit genocide.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:26 PM
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Divorce, travel, bicycles, wine, public radio? Never has my theory that White People and Europeans share some common ancestor looked so good!


Posted by: ed bowlinger | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:27 PM
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Hobart make lots of useful stuff.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:29 PM
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We never made bread.

The Kitchenaid Artisan series struggles a bit with making bread because the swivel mount contains a U-joint that wastes a lot of the motor's power. The "Professional" series (i.e. the more costly one) has a fixed head and does an decent job with bread. Of course, I wouldn't want to put it up against the Hobart floor mixer.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:30 PM
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You could put it into the Hobart mixer.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:33 PM
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257: Makes you wonder how long it will be before some of this stuff becomes obligatory for a properly furnished suburban kitchen. It wasn't that long ago that the idea of spending $6,000 on a refrigerator or a range would have struck even most rich people as insane, and today even non-rich people overextend themselves to buy one. The Hobart floor mixer would seem to be the logical end point of the trend toward "professional grade" kitchen equipment.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:36 PM
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There's nothing really rich people do more than whip up 60 quarts of dough.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:43 PM
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261: I dunno, how often do they need the equipment they have now?


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:47 PM
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Didn't the housing bubble do a lot to prompt the trend toward high-end kitchen stuff? Once it reaches a certain price, it's a "home improvement," and in a rising market, home improvement pays for itself in the long run. Of course, it may have gained its own momentum by now.


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:47 PM
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You know what sounds good? A scone. (I mean Utah style scone, fried dough, elephant ear, or whatever else it's called other places)


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:51 PM
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Maybe "fried dough" needs to be added to the list of Stuff White People Like.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:54 PM
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Wait, $6000 on a refrigerator???


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:55 PM
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I think fried dough is common to many cultures. The Native American autumn shindig in my local park serves some excellently greasy frybread with stuff on it.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:56 PM
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Can I just say that I'm in the office at 10 pm on a Saturday after I've already quit, writing a brief for usurers? It's like they scoured the firm to give me something lower than Big Tobacco.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 7:59 PM
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Other things for the list.

Stealing Food From Other Cultures
Killing Off Other Cultures


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:00 PM
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White people like defaulting on mortgages in front of their giant, shiny ranges.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:01 PM
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That's the problem with making cooking at home aspirational.

Most kitchen gagetry sucks (decent mixers if you regularly bake more complex than cookies, and processers excluded)


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:03 PM
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266: boggle.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:03 PM
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Wait, $6000 on a refrigerator???

Try $13,000 on a refrigerator. Subzero, baby. No 5,000 square foot home is complete without one.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:04 PM
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White people like to go out in the middle of nowhere and shoot at stuff.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:04 PM
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OMFG. Yes to 57, and 91.

I am surprised, honestly. I saw myself in it, imperfectly of course. It won't match anyone perfectly. But so funny. Then I read this thread, and it too is hilarious, but unintentionally.

C'mon, don't you know the anime geek, the sushi snob, the indie music snob, the beer snob, the recycler? They aren't all one person.


Posted by: Pantene | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:05 PM
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LB, that really sucks.

232: as evidenced by 232


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:05 PM
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274: And drink cheap beer. Often at the same time.

275: You didn't find it formulaic after, what, #5? And theres 60 some odd ....


Posted by: sou | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:07 PM
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Every culture has a form of fried dough. It's one of the criteria of being a culture.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:08 PM
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Every culture has a form of fried dough. It's one of the criteria of being a culture.

You're just asking to get beat down by an Eskimo.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:10 PM
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I'm taking a stand against weak-kneed pansy liberal relativism, is all.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:13 PM
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Most kitchen gagetry sucks (decent mixers if you regularly bake more complex than cookies, and processers excluded)

I agree with the general sentiment, but I would allow a few more exceptions. An immersible blender is incredibly useful, as is a waffle iron if you like to make waffles. There are quite a few specialized items that I would be hard-pressed to do some of my best cooking without: meat thermometer, wire cooling racks, pastry brushes, piping tips.

I think the bulk of kitchen gadgetry that runs on electricity or contains a cutting blade is basically redundant with basic tools.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:13 PM
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I absolutely agree that it is formulaic. The post titles make a fine list without the actual posts. I was still tickled.


Posted by: Pantene | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:16 PM
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I would be lost in the kitchen without my Sausage Shooter.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:20 PM
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281 is fair .... it wasn't meant as an exhaustive list but I stated it as if it were. The useless-to-marginal gadgets far outnumber the useful ones, but the latter certainly exist.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:22 PM
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I would be lost in the kitchen bedroom without my Sausage Shooter.

We knew what you meant.



Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:27 PM
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276b: The cleverness level has dropped off considerably, too.


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:27 PM
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The thing is that only useless or near-useless things are gadgets. Useful things are tools. The selfsame object that's a gadget in one person's home could be a tool in another's.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:28 PM
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287: Well of course one man's tool can be another man's gadget.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:36 PM
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267: Even better for stuff white people love. It's Artisanal Authentic Blessing Way Scones.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:37 PM
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The selfsame object that's a gadget in one person's home could be a tool in another's.

For instance, this.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:39 PM
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281: You must include a mandoline slicer to the list.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:39 PM
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281: You must include a mandoline slicer to the list.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:40 PM
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Why would you want to slice a mandoline?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:42 PM
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I feel strongly about that, obviously


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:42 PM
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I'm generally the most self-righteous anti-kitchen-gadget person one could imagine, which is why when I decided that I needed a little battery-powered milk-frother (the "Aerolatte"), my honey gave me so much shit; however! I tell you, it is soooo fantastic. It's basically just a tiny little whisk spun around on a stick, and the whole thing is about the sise of a knife. Not ten minutes ago I drank some delicious hot frothy hot chocolate.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:44 PM
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I bet there's a whisk attachment for dremel tools; you could have gotten one of those.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:47 PM
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two types of dunkin donuts, long quadrangular shaped glazed and non-glazed, i don't know what those are called i sometimes buy it from the tray in cafeteria, resemble ours in taste, just a bit light


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:51 PM
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Eventually I am going to need some dremel tools, so I'll certainly look into the whisk attachments when I do so.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 8:58 PM
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Another thing white people like? Tonight I ate popcorn popped in truffle oil and sprinkled with yeast and sea salt. OMFG, that was the best popcorn I've ever eaten in my life.

WHITE PEOPLE LIKE POPCORN POPPED IN TRUFFLE OIL!


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:12 PM
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Truffle oil is a scam, you know.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:19 PM
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A scam, I tell you!


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:22 PM
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I'm struck by the extent to which I've apparently moved from being "white" to being "old."

In other news, we went to a movie tonight: The Violin. You folks could do a whole lot worse than switching off your computers right now, hying yourselves to the nearest theater, and watching this one.

What you're still reading? Go to the movie.


Posted by: Nápi | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:26 PM
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El Violin


Posted by: Nápi | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:27 PM
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That article is so white, Ben.

I don't care, it was DAMN GOOD POPCORN.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:30 PM
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No blood for truffle oil.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:31 PM
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Grape soda is a scam.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 9:40 PM
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That subzero kitchen stuff is a scam.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:02 PM
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No subzero grape soda for truffle oil.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:16 PM
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I found the site to be fairly amusing, but I have to say I kind of agree with this...

I guess the thing I resent about the site (I still haven't read most of this thread) isn't that me and the rest of the NPR set are being skewered (lord knows we deserve it) but that *we* are considered the essence of whiteness, when we are really a minority of white people.

In some entries this wasn't terribly evident. But it was very odd in some. The "knowing what's best for poor people" one was particularly odd, in that it noted that white people are upset that poor people "vote republican."

I mean, huh? Surely, if we were defining white people in a more normal way, "the Republican Party" would be defined as something white people like. Also, poor people who aren't white vote for Democrats, largely. It's just a definitional mess, where they've put themselves in a very strange place.


Posted by: Wry Cooter | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:21 PM
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Surely, if we were defining white people in a more normal way, "the Republican Party" would be defined as something white people like.

The site's about the sort of white people who do things that are genuinely fun to poke gentle fun at, not things which are actually horrifying and not at all funny.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:34 PM
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310 is right, which is what I found lame. It's like somebody saw the yuppie scenes in Waiting For Guffman and though "there is my empire."


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:42 PM
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I like all ten of the rap songs white people like. I almost missed liking that I Got a Man/Positive K song but it is on this hot chip compilation. Hot chip is very white.

I thought it was funny. White people disproportionately like the things on that list. I myself like Expensive Sandwiches, Japan, Juno, Lawyers, Apologies, Sarah Silverman, Living by the water, Irony, Vintage, Asian Fusion Food, Sushi, Indie Music, Apple Products, Netflix, The Daily Show/Colbert Report, Snowboarding, David Sedaris, "Gifted" Children, Wes Anderson movies, and Barack Obama. And, I don't just randomly like these things. Most of them I like because some other white person liked it first and told me about it.


Posted by: lemmy caution | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:44 PM
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I'm back from the date.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:47 PM
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"[Ethnic] people do this, white people do that" humour is almost always pretty lame, really.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:48 PM
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Also, a good chunk of the things on the list are also liked by various black and brown people, who I guess get to be honorary white people for these purposes. They may not be flattered by this designation.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 10:55 PM
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313: nailed?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:01 PM
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Slack, you're so humorless white Canadian sometimes.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:01 PM
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You can take the dude off of the tundra, but you can't take the tundra out of the dude.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:04 PM
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Jesus, 315 comments before someone made the obvious joke? Y'all are losing your touch.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:04 PM
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316: No, but I did kiss her.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:04 PM
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In the old days, Josh, we refrained from making the obvious joke.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:05 PM
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We did?


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:13 PM
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You wouldn't have noticed, not having a sense of humor.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:14 PM
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In the old days, B, we let ben keep his delusions.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:14 PM
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My sense of humor is just too subtle for you, Ben.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:14 PM
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Woo teo! (what's Armsmasher's expression again?)


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:15 PM
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For once I'm accused of not having a mind fine enough.

Witt: "Hook 'em teo woo!" is I think the way he'd put it.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:16 PM
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324 is most assuredly not true.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 02-16-08 11:16 PM
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Hooray!

I'm jealous, teo.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 12:15 AM
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Yay, teo!

Your heritage reminds me to mention: I am at a conference in Santa Fe and just went drinking at the "Cowgirl" bar. OMG, the drinks were so cheap! The waitress had a piercing on top of her sternum! are such dorks when out drinking on conference!


Posted by: Counterfly | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 12:49 AM
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Er, that should read left-arrow my profession right-arrow are such dorks when out drinking on conference.


Posted by: Counterfly | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 1:00 AM
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315 tells it like it is.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 1:26 AM
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Ah teo - you've made a bunch of old white people very proud. So are you seeing her again?


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 2:28 AM
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238, 247 -- Wait Cala, are you trying to win people* over to our side or not?

* Apparently we're short with elderly white women, Hispanic men, and male career politicians.


Posted by: Nápi | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 6:11 AM
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and two out of three ain't bad.


Posted by: Nápi | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 6:18 AM
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honorary whites? off the tundra? the obvious joke?
again i doubt my presense here
you were talking what beliefs will change 50 100 yrs from now
hopefully this whites thing will die off but the hope is futile


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 6:32 AM
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I felicitate Teo!

This white person likes having successfully defended her dissertation.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 7:18 AM
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Congrats, rfts!


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 7:39 AM
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Congrats rtfs!

teo: w00t!


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 7:54 AM
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Woots and congrats to teo and Redfox, respectively.

Also, an Aerolatte high-five to Jackmormon. We love ours.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 8:50 AM
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Hook 'em teo and redfoxtailshrub woo, indeed!


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 9:10 AM
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Congrats RTFS!


Posted by: Will | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 9:19 AM
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Fantastic, RTFS.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:03 AM
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Woo rtfs.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:29 AM
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That's awesome, rfts. You too, teo.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:34 AM
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Thanks! I'm going to engage in a nice stretch of concerted goofing off now.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:39 AM
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RFTS:

I think you should do a happy dance. If you really want to amuse us, you would post a happy dance youtube video.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:41 AM
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Congrats, shrub, and thanks, everyone.

Your heritage reminds me to mention: I am at a conference in Santa Fe and just went drinking at the "Cowgirl" bar.

I was actually in Santa Fe today (which is why I hadn't seen the recent comments until just now), and ate dinner at the Zia Cafe, which I believe is pretty close to that bar.

So are you seeing her again?

Yes, and very soon, because we seem to have inadvertently exchanged driver's licenses at the bar last night.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 9:50 PM
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Sneaky, teo.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 9:59 PM
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He stole that trick from George on Seinfeld.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:00 PM
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Did George do that? My mom said it sounded like something he might do.

Anyway, I just saw her and got it straightened out. We're going to do something on Wednesday, but we haven't yet settled on what.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:26 PM
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Anyway, I just saw her and got it straightened out.

Your Longfellow?


Posted by: Harold Bloom | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:27 PM
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Teo is Llew Llaw Gyffes.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:28 PM
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She. It was her trick. Teo is irresistable.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:29 PM
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Your Longfellow?

No, it was already pretty straight.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:31 PM
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I was thinking of the time he left something in a woman's apartment so he'd have a reason to go back.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:32 PM
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I may have been thinking of someone else, actually.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:36 PM
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I was thinking of the time he left something in a woman's apartment so he'd have a reason to go back.

Oh, right, I remember that.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:39 PM
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I may have been thinking of someone else, actually.

One of the hazards of habitually making extremely obscure allusions.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:40 PM
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Oh, Llew Llaw Gyffes! No, that's someone else.


Posted by: Harold Bloom | Link to this comment | 02-17-08 10:44 PM
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Whites in South Africa can still be heard talking of a non-white and saying 'He/She's almost white'. Is that just a local saying in South Africa or is it/was it said in places like Louisiana, Georgia etc?


Posted by: Herr Torquewrench | Link to this comment | 02-18-08 6:01 AM
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presence
but may be pre-sense was better, i tend to overrely on my intuition and sensitivity which is really bothersome irl


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 02-18-08 6:35 AM
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Teo is Llew Llaw Gyffes

He made a woman out of flowers, and then she went off with his best friend?


Posted by: emir | Link to this comment | 02-18-08 7:34 AM
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