Re: Which Is Fussier?

1

The gym.

Tell them they're being Terribly Wasteful and UnGreen. Maybe that'll work.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:37 PM
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This place is so ridiculous that I'm halfway tempted to request a wipe warmer, just to see if they'd do it.


Posted by: Becks | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:42 PM
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3

3) when you bring your own stock of unscented baby wipes.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:45 PM
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4

Of course, instead of fussiness, it could be a hilarious overreaction to potential liability.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:46 PM
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5

Babies smell good. Well, most of the time.


Posted by: Tassled Loafered Leech | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:46 PM
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4: Same diff.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:47 PM
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Baby wipes? Don't they contain some sort of oil or lotion so as not to chap the baby's butt? Isn't that going to be awfully slippery for gym equipment?


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:49 PM
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Outside of these:

Our baby wipes are moistened with natural aloe vera, vitamin E, and water to cleanse and moisturize gently and naturally. Unlike many traditional baby wipes, ours are not bleached with chlorine and do not contain alcohol or synthetic ingredients that can irate baby's skin.
I think they mostly are treated with alcohol; they're essentially a different delivery system for hand sanitizer. Also the gym probably doesn't have "baby wipes" per se, but disinfecting wipes, which are for grownups, doncha know.

They come in quite handy if you happen to be out in the desert with no access to shower facilities for a week or so and would still like to convince somebody to have sex with you.

Or so I hear.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:56 PM
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9

Yargh. Insert </blockquote> between "skin." and "I".


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:57 PM
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5: This one smells pretty good.


Posted by: TJ | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:57 PM
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Our gym did that. I figured it was cheaper, or more convenient or something. That they would rather generate huge amounts of garbage than go to the bother of doing laundry.


Posted by: Fatman | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 6:58 PM
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7: Not really.

Baby wipes are awesome for that last ass wipe after taking a shit. Once you've had them in the house, they're on the "staples" list.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:01 PM
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13

Staples are terrible for that last ass wipe after taking a shit.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:17 PM
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12: Totally. If I were wealthy and earth-hating, I would keep them on hand all the time. But because I love the earth and the Japanese, I guess I'll just get a washlet.

(Teacher Tweety, are you watching this game?)


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:22 PM
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I was going to weigh in with the gym being terribly fussy but then I realized that I would love it if someone, anyone, insisted that people wipe down the equipment at our Castro branch of Gold's Gym with ANYTHING. Baby wipes, paper towels, the silky tresses of the boys behind the check-in counter... just wipe it down. It's icky.

And I ditto 12.


Posted by: moira | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:24 PM
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12: Yes, they are evil.

14: As I'm wealthy and earth-hating, I use them to wipe my ass, to sponge bathe *before* getting into the shower, and to wipe down my bike after a ride. Sometimes I even open a whole package and THROW IT AWAY immediately. Just for fun.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:26 PM
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8: Never turn your back on an irate baby skin.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:27 PM
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14: now I am. Yikes! Couldn't we just blow 'em out on occasion?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:31 PM
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The Yoga Studio I go to makes people who rent mats wipe them down afterwards. They don't use baby wipes; they have some special yoga mat sanitizing wipe.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:35 PM
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20

I wish I had a bidet.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:37 PM
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21

Bring a dirty diaper and say "In for a penny, in for a pound."


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:42 PM
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22

20: to bring to the gym?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:45 PM
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Anywhere! But since I don't belong to a gym, perhaps one in my apartment would be more convenient.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:46 PM
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24

My confidence in LaTroy Hawkins is slightly higher than in Kyle Farnsworth, but that ain't saying much.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:50 PM
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25

JP used to blog about something called a "biffy".


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:51 PM
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26

25 to 23.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 7:52 PM
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27

So by all accounts this Obama vs Clinton debate was a global showcase of idiot Americans and their idiot media with their idiot questions. Did anyone see it?


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:04 PM
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They come in quite handy if you happen to be out in the desert with no access to shower facilities for a week or so and would still like to convince somebody to have sex with you.

A ho-bath: pits, tits, and ass. As I've heard it derogitorily called. But probably just because they're talking about Sifu.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:04 PM
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One of the major TP makers started advertising butt wipes for grownups, but I haven't seen em in the stores yet. That's fine - we have a preschooler, so Cottonelle Kids wipes are totally acceptable to have on hand.

They go in the toilet, so they're no more problematic than TP (more resource intensive, but also a lot more effective - you're using them in place of at least some TP). But now I hate shitting in public restrooms - no final wipe!


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:08 PM
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27: I turned it off after about thirty minutes because the questions were so pointless and stupid (Jeremiah Wright! Pennsylvanians are bitter! Sniper fire in Bosnia! You said he's not electable! blahblahblahblah...).


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:09 PM
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27: Ah, that's why I returned to my computer after 4 evening hours away to find a chock-full RSS.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:09 PM
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27: I took a look at the debate, listened to some question about gun control, wondered when it became the early 1990s again, and watched something else.


Posted by: eb | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:10 PM
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27: Zowie; the debate is so bad that it just resulted in "what the fuck" going up on the front page of Crooked Timber. They're usually a bit more circumspect over there.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:11 PM
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||

If this game lasts five hours I'm going to be mad. If it lasts five hours and the sox don't win I'm going to be either homicidal or suicidally depressed at having watched this for so many hours.

|>


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:12 PM
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8: I was sending them by the Costco-load to my cousin when he was in Iraq, but I don't think he'd found anyone there to convince to have sex with him. Just dust-removal, mostly.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:23 PM
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35: yeah I mean they're useful for general hygiene, too. Write what you know, isn't that what they say?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:26 PM
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34: Dude. I took my pre-schooler to Opening Day. After 90 minutes - and 2-1/2 innings - we were down 7-0. I gritted my teeth and stayed. Comeback. Tie. 12 innings. 4:45. Our last pitcher - a Rule 5 guy - comes in and walks 4 (plus a hit and sac fly).

The only good news was the gorgeous bike ride home.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:29 PM
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38

So what you're saying is that you can't honestly describe yourself as a dirty hippie?


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:30 PM
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39

Oh, boo, I haven't seen the devate yet, since obviously it got pushed back on this coast. Mr. B. is watching Wheel of Fortune in the meantime.

Shoot me now.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:31 PM
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38: certainly not!

I can honestly describe myself as dirty, baby wipes or no baby wipes, but I'm hardly a hippie.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:32 PM
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41

Clean fucking quasi-hipster.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:39 PM
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42

The Yoga Studio I go to makes people who rent mats wipe them down afterwards.

As well they should; not cleaning a mat after use is a really good way for the next person who uses it to get ring worm. It's relatively common for wrestlers to get it.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:41 PM
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41: Ain't no "quasi" about it. I mean, have you seen his shoes?


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:42 PM
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Dude no way I'm a cyberpunk!

(It's true! Rudy Rucker said so!)

(Is that word more or less dated than "flapper"? I vote more.)


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:44 PM
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45

Yes, but have you ever hacked the planet?


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:47 PM
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Hah! Two pieces of trivia from the making of that movie: they took pictures of people at this hacker con in New York (HOPE) for costuming ideas. Unfortunately everybody there was dressed in black t-shirts and tevas with socks except for two of my friends, who had on the one hand blue hair and on the other a computer chip glued to his forehead and a jumpsuit with flames on it. So if you saw that movie and thought "why do the hackers look like idiot ravers instead of, you know, computer nerds?" you can partly blame my friends. Second piece of trivia: this schlubby, acne-ridden hacker kid who hung around Emmanuel Goldstein of 2600 magazine got invited, along with most of the 2600 crew, to the premiere and afterparty, at which party he picked up Angelina Jolie and went home with her. No lie.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 8:51 PM
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47

Free Kevin!


Posted by: cheerylilgoth | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:02 PM
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Heh, I have a feeling this is my gym. If so, they get lots of complaints about the wastefulness of the gym wipes (the target demographic of this place is extremely green), but so far they're sticking to it. If it makes you feel any better, people generally only use them for the aerobic machines that they're on for a while/sweat all over, not for every weight machine they sit on for a couple minutes. (Not that the distinction makes a whole lot of sense.)

Also, they are not, and do not smell to me much like, baby wipes. More like those disposable Clorox-type wipes, though not as bleachy.


Posted by: potchkeh | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:04 PM
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Baby wipes are awesome for that last ass wipe after taking a shit. Once you've had them in the house, they're on the "staples" list.

I wish I had a bidet.

My new house came with water-squirting toilets. They have changed my life. My ass is clean in a way it never could have been before. Plus, we spend less on toilet paper because we now use it mainly for patting dry rather than actually wiping clean.


Posted by: Gaijin Biker | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:07 PM
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You either have vastly more detailed budgeting than I do, GB, or toilet paper is prohibitively expensive in Japan.

I mean "use less", that I can see. But "spend less"? What do you buy with the money you save? An eighth of a candy bar?

Maybe I'm revealing my financial ignorance and toilet paper really is expensive.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:10 PM
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Well, the problem is not so much the cost of TP, but rather the unsightly and awkward spectacle of carring a huge pack of it home from the store. Now, we do that less often.


Posted by: Gaijin Biker | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:11 PM
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Second piece of trivia: this schlubby, acne-ridden hacker kid who hung around Emmanuel Goldstein of 2600 magazine got invited, along with most of the 2600 crew, to the premiere and afterparty, at which party he picked up Angelina Jolie and went home with her. No lie.

Was this kid's name "Jonny Lee Miller"? Or was this before she and Miller got together?

(I always wonder, wrt that movie, if they ignored everything the 2600 guys told them, or if that movie was the 2600 crew's biggest prank ever.)


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:21 PM
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52: this was before she and Miller got together.

In re: that movie, I think they nodded sagely along to everything the 2600 guys told them, then as soon as they left the room said "oh my god we can't make a movie about those freakshows," hired a bunch of NYC club kids to do the set design and adapted The Bad News Bears with computery jargon and less foul language. Also they cast Angelina Jolie, and then hired somebody brilliant to put together a soundtrack.

But seriously, they were snappin' picture after picture of my friends, and almost none of anybody else (except Wesley Crusher's super-hot girlfriend); we've always wondered how much of the non-hackerness was their fault.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:30 PM
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and then hired somebody brilliant to put together a soundtrack

Holy crap. I just looked at the soundtrack listing, and you're right, that's fucking amazing. I'd totally forgotten.

(This is the music I missed out on, going to college in the middle of fucking nowhere. AUGH.)


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 9:35 PM
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Sifu, do you know a guy named Ben She/rman? Who doesn't make clothing or tobacco?

Cause there was one who was lately my sysadmin who has some sort of connection to organizing HOPE.


Posted by: Tom | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 10:42 PM
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Heh, yup, sure do.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 10:49 PM
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57

Not sure he'd recognize Sifu Tweety, though; I went by tfish then.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-16-08 10:51 PM
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I wish I had a bidet.

The public toilets at the Gulbenkian Institute in Lisbon have a bidet in every cubicle. Even in the men's. In any other context, this would be the most awesome thing in the museum.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 7:50 AM
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So what you're saying is....Blume is Angelina Jolie?


Posted by: Fatman | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 8:13 AM
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Certainly not. Blume is much cooler than Angelina Jolie.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:01 AM
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Blume's much more attractive than Angelina Jolie, come on.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:05 AM
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Blume is smarter and funnier than Angelina Jolie!


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:05 AM
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All true.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:06 AM
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Blume's much more attractive than Angelina Jolie, come on.

Having seen only one of them naked, I'll have to reserve judgment until I have sufficient evidence to make a fully informed decision. Laydeez.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:16 AM
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Tweety is all retro with his cyberpunk chic. He needs to become a forward-thinking fashion plate and adopt steampunk.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:32 AM
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66

Yes, I am a bit intoxicated. What?


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:33 AM
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57: Hah... I'll avoid saying something cliched about the size of the world and instead just commit to asking him about tfish.


Posted by: Tom | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 9:57 AM
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65: also a term invented by a friend!

66: Eggplant either you're in Europe or points east or I'm very impressed with you.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:02 AM
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Steampunk is so over.


Posted by: felix | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:09 AM
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68: Ha. I was thinking, tell me you're in Alaska, Eggplant, and it all makes sense.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:11 AM
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71

Fuck me, Felix, you're moving with some heavyweights there!


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:12 AM
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68.1 turns out to be a lie; that first recorded use is about three years before the one I'm thinking of. Stupid lying friend.

69: hah! Awesome.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:18 AM
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Midwest! And employed!!


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:20 AM
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73: nicely done, sir.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:22 AM
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Sifu, what kind of half-assed people do you camp with that they can't manage to assemble a shower? I suggest you trade up for friends with more useful skills.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:25 AM
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71: If only it actually existed and wasn't just a leftover April Fool's joke. . .


Posted by: felix | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:27 AM
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75: oh, we have a shower now. 97-98 we were pretty half-assed, it's true.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:28 AM
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76: you an INFERNOKRUSHER fan, felix?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:31 AM
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73: Where do you work? Are they hiring?


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:34 AM
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74: Thank you. My only regret is that with no political thread, the brilliant plan to save the election I just hallucinated will disappear unheard and unloved. Tragic, really.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:37 AM
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79: Mostly at my desk, sometimes the comfy chair at home. I'll ask!


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:39 AM
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The comfy chair agrees, but the desk resists. It doesn't think you're real.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:40 AM
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78: I do like fire, I won't deny it. (Also, crushing).


Posted by: felix | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 10:40 AM
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Blume's much more attractive than Angelina Jolie, come on.

Having seen only one of them naked, I'll have to reserve judgment until I have sufficient evidence to make a fully informed decision. Laydeez.

Unfortunately for you, apo, uDCon III is going to take place on the west coast.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 12:57 PM
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uDCon III is going to take place on the west coast.

HURRAH!!


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-17-08 12:59 PM
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it is?? shit y'all, inform a sister.


Posted by: alameida | Link to this comment | 04-18-08 1:18 AM
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This is a lie. A happy lie, but a lie nonetheless.

(Unless it isn't, in case, whoopee! [But it is. Sorrow.])


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 04-18-08 1:37 AM
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