Re: I vote Foster Care-y.

1

erm, heebie, are you time travelling?


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 11:42 AM
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I think maybe there's supposed to be a link in the first word of this post?


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 11:46 AM
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1: see, originally I wrote this post this morning, and then decided to wait, and then found out that the time-stamps don't self-update if you lolly-gag, so I auto-updated them.

2: Well, I didn't, because the front page takes you to a way later post in the story, which seems a bad place to start from.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 11:48 AM
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But then I have no way to get to her front page! Unless I edit the url myself. By hand. Or search for some link on her page to take me there.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:01 PM
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The best place to put such a link, in my view, would be like so:

If you've read through those chapters, then I'm sure you're hooked. There are 7 more chapters currently written, but they're all in June, and readily clickable from her front page.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:03 PM
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Also, this is indeed fascinating reading.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:04 PM
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The solution in 5 is fine, but the "This is a site..." at the begining of the post still throws me. What is the "this" referring to if there's no link? It's borderline dishonest. Maybe if you changed it to read "There exists a site..."


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:07 PM
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There! That should clear things up!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:09 PM
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Well, that was uncalled for.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:11 PM
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Really? I thought it was the perfect abuse of power as a newbie poster.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:12 PM
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Well, that was uncalled for.

I think you mean "borderline dishonest."


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:13 PM
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My mom really does double-click on everything.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:14 PM
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I'm not even sure that email address will work.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:14 PM
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Hmm. Should I include another update to address that?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:16 PM
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what if I LIKE double-clicking? Can I still follow the rest of the directions?


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:18 PM
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it is a bit unusual that her banner doesn't go home.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:19 PM
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My mom was wondering recently about an old friend of hers; I asked if she had googled this friend's name, mentioning that she should put the name in quotation marks. Mom replied with a look of wonder: "Oh! And then she'll write back to me?"

So cute.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:22 PM
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You're unusual that the banner doesn't go home.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:23 PM
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15: That is uncharted territory. Go carefully, and report back what happens.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:24 PM
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You know, the problem with putting up something really long for everyone to go read is that then there's no one to talk to while everyone goes and reads it.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:25 PM
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18: I am?


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:26 PM
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I already read that whole website. I'll talk to you!


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:26 PM
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only for 10 minutes though because I am at a fancy conference and I have to go pretend I am an adult and pay attention to things


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:27 PM
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20: I read your whole post, heebie. Not to worry.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:27 PM
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I was just about to say, you sabotaged yourself because I just clicked over to your blog that I didn't know you had, and am now busily reading up. Your alibi about being at a conference checks out.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:28 PM
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24: I really do have a math post pre-written. I was thinking I'd save it for this weekend when Jammies's parents are in town and I might be indisposed. And I'm using math loosely, but it's logical at least, and accessible to everyone.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:30 PM
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Sigh. I wonder what ogged would say about this.

|>


Posted by: sam k | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:30 PM
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I read all the parts that you linked! But there are more things to read, and I got sucked in. Also I am busy having a conversation about how using iTunes as an intermediate layer for everything iPhone sure is irritating.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:30 PM
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ha! here's what I suddenly got worried about: someone from this same conference googled me earlier today. Maybe I should stop talking shit about it in public.

OR MAYBE NOT.


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:31 PM
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Well, we already had the Foster Care-y discussion below, so perhaps we should have the Adorable discussion here.

I'll start. Those pictures Joseph drew sure are adorable! Especially the anal bleeding one.


Posted by: Grumps | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:31 PM
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23: woo deaf people! I'm halfway there with you!

28: when you use non-iCal calendaring there's two intermediate layers! Neato!

26: this weekend when I won't be reading. I guess I know how things are.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:32 PM
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31: does that mean you are halfway to Connecticut or you are halfway deaf?


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:34 PM
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I read it, Heebie! I can't help but think that these people are superheroes. And that if I really want to change the world, I'll become a social worker and not suck at it.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:35 PM
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this weekend when I won't be reading. I guess I know how things are.

Really? I can cater to my fans; I'll save it for Monday.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:36 PM
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Or maybe tomorrow.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:36 PM
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36

Mr.H, remind me what you're back in school for? It's something along these lines, right?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:37 PM
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32: halfway deaf. I won't be halfway to connecticut until tomorrow, and since I'm not actually going to connecticut that's only technically true.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:38 PM
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halfway deaf.

slacker.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:39 PM
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39

Okay I have to go learn things. UP NEXT: Integrating Lexical Information Into Sign Language Databases And Corpora!

I think tomorrow I may try to sneak in some alcohol. I am totally a grown up.


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:40 PM
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Look, how many hours can I spend standing in front of giant stacks of speakers, realistically? I think I've done all I can.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:40 PM
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41

quitters never win, Sifu.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:42 PM
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42

The word "update" should be in bold. House Style must be maintained!


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:47 PM
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This is heart-warming. Would Ogged have allowed that? Isn't Unfogged a grumpy blog (TM)?


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:48 PM
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Mr.H, remind me what you're back in school for? It's something along these lines, right?

No, it's public policy, which, I suppose, could lead me to either quantifying exactly how the foster care system is broken, or writing ineffectual papers on how to fix it.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:51 PM
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Right. I remembered that it was in the "make the world a better place" vein, as opposed to "keep technology running smoothly". I paint with a broad brush.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:53 PM
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46

Oh! I just got to the most recent entry about Joseph, and the story of what happened to his birth dad is SAD.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:53 PM
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47

it's like you don't even believe technology is a social benefit, heebie


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:54 PM
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I know. Joey is such a likable person, who keeps trying in the face of everything. It's awful that his relationship with Joseph gets severed. He could have had permanent playdates or something.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:55 PM
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47: okay, whatever, with your techno-speak. I just fear it, is all.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 12:57 PM
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50

erm, that wasn't literal.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:01 PM
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51

WHAT'S WITH THE THIRD DEGREE? GET OFF MY CASE.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:02 PM
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52

???

boggle.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:05 PM
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53

I sorta kinda want to foster/adopt a kid or two, and Mr. B. says hell no. Probably he's right.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:05 PM
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54

52: oh I love Boggle.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:06 PM
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And don't hassle heebie, people. Or I'll start a frustrating and unnecessary fight.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:06 PM
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56

Oh, good.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:09 PM
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I just read all of think linked posts, and I'm very glad that I did.

She tells the story well, and there's a lot of different emotions in that story.


Posted by: NickS | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:09 PM
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Yay! A frustrating and unnecessary fight! Start the popcorn!


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:09 PM
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52: (Totally teasing you, Soupy.)


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:10 PM
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we haven't had a frustrating and unnecessary fight for weeks! Unless I missed one. Entirely plausible.

(Totally teasing you, Soupy.)
Oh good. Not my day at all, so I'm easily boggled I guess.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:12 PM
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54: oh I love Boggle.

Indeed. One of my past favorite Internet time wasters, a Boggleish game called Tangleword went away not too long ago (I had cold turkeyed it a year or two earlier. I wanted to spend more quality time with my family ....). So far none of the others available seem quite as good.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:15 PM
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One of my past favorite Internet time wasters, a Boggleish game called Tangleword went away not too long ago

Ohhhh man, that sucked up a SHITLOAD of my life.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:17 PM
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63

No, wait, it was Weboggle.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:18 PM
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64

wow


Posted by: spaz | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:19 PM
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65

62 gets it exactly right.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:20 PM
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66

(exactly right, that is, given the correction in 63)


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:21 PM
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53
I sorta kinda want to foster/adopt a kid or two, and Mr. B. says hell no. Probably he's right.

After my 'rents more or less successfully raised their four sprog (yeah I'm oldest, male, left-handed. The world stood no chance) my mother told my father she wanted to adopt. That is one of the few times I heard my father curse (as opposed to cuss). He said "Jesus Christ D3lores!"

That is why I think powerful words should be reserved for when you need them. Because some times, lets face it, you need them.


Posted by: Tripp the Crazed | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:41 PM
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I'd never heard of weboggle. I just found the website, and sat here staring at the "register now to play" buttons on the screen for a good five full minutes. I eventually clicked away, and sucessfully, I'm happy to report, but man was that a close flirtation with disaster.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:45 PM
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I'm using math loosely, but it's logical at least . . .

Did anyone else do those logic puzzles that you use a grid to solve when you were a kid? Ms. A didn't use the yellow gun to accidentally blow G's brains out. Mr. P cleaned up G's brains 25 minutes before the shooter, whose first name was not F, rampaged in a high school. Who shot whom and who needed a trigger lock?

Anyway, I showed some to my 9-year-old niece and she's now hooked on them. (Yay! And Encyclopedia Brown. I'll turn her into a mini-me yet.) I'm rehooked on the more complicated ones. Between these and the NYT crossword, I'm never getting Alzheimer's.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:48 PM
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I'm looking forward to getting PK hooked on those. Soon....


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:50 PM
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My parents have fostered for about 22 years. I used to think I'd do it one day - it was great with the cute toddlers, the baby we had for 20 months and all loved, various under-10s, even the special needs siblings who still text me to tell me they love me - but the last 10 with a long-term placement of a boy with Reactive Attachment Disorder (short description: he's a wanker) have put me off that idea. He's 18 now, moves out this summer. I cannot wait.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:52 PM
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Between these and the NYT crossword, I'm never getting Alzheimer's.

My current regime of Alzheimer's prevention includes (pretty easy) cryptics. They are the mostest funnest.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:53 PM
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||

I am currently amused by the elaborate politeness on display in the Senate, as my boss graciously interrupts his FISA speech to let some other senators sneak a few statements in.

|>


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:53 PM
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69 - oh yes. My eldest had a phase of them last year. #2's not really that way inclined. Must show #3, he likes the various Japanese puzzles already.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:55 PM
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71:

Oh. My. God.

A teen? Plus male?! Plus a disorder?!! Plus foster care?!!!

Your parents have a lock on heaven, that is for sure.


Posted by: Tripp the Crazed | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 1:59 PM
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Reactive Attachment Disorder

Yeah, this sort of thing gives me serious pause, especially b/c PK's still young himself.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:00 PM
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76 - of course, you can say yes or no to children they ask you to take in. Here, if you have a 7 year old, they'd probably suggest anyway that you have children younger than that. I found emergency/short-term was good, pretty enjoyable, but long-term can be really really hard work.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:09 PM
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Between these and the NYT crossword, I'm never getting Alzheimer's.

As I read NBA draft coverage, I wonder whether involvement fantasy sports (loosely defined) prevents or encourages Alzheimer's


Posted by: NickS | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:11 PM
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78: I dunno but it sure seems to degrade grammar and punctuation.


Posted by: Tripp the Crazed | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:16 PM
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The archives tell me that I haven't yet mentioned here that my sister is adopting a baby from Ethiopia (one of the few countries that still lets single women adopt). She got a referral a few weeks ago, meaning she's found out which baby she's adopting.

I've been wondering what kind of attachment or other issues they'll encounter. I mean, I'm sure there are always attachment issues in adoption, and especially international trans-racial ones. The baby will be about 9 months old when my sister actually gets to bring her home in -- we hope -- the next 6-8 weeks.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:18 PM
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77: Right, they say the same thing here. I just worry, myself, about *not* taking a kid long-term. It just seems like short-term bopping in and out of foster care isn't so hot for kids, and I'm not sure I really want to be part of that, y'know?

Then again, it's reality, and they probably need someone to do it. And the temporary thing might make Mr. B. feel better about it. Hm.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:30 PM
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Woooo - that's really exciting SK! There's loads of stuff out there to read about attachment disorders if you want to, and I'm sure there's a lot from the specialist international adoption angle too. I guess it's good to be prepared, but there won't necessarily be any problem - and if there are, then you've got a lot more chance with a 9 month old baby than a 9 year old child. Congratulations on your enhanced aunthood!


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:32 PM
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81: Well, they're probably different populations of kids, right? It may not be that you're forcing a long-term kid to split up their stay into several pieces, but giving a short-term kid a single residence while their parents are unavailable.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:33 PM
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83: Right.

Obviously I need to actually gather some information rather than doing my usual thing of imagining a jillion different scenarios while sitting on my ass doing nothing.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:35 PM
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82: Thanks! We have only one picture of her (Amara) which I keep on my desktop. She's gorgeous, though I suppose that's fairly redundant when it comes to babies.

My sister has done tons of reading and going to adoption groups, and etc., so I think she's as prepared as is possible.

My nieces and nephew here are thrilled to be getting another cousin. I don't think they'll have any trouble accepting her into the family, but we'll see. They've interacted with shockingly few black people in their lives, which probably cuts both ways, I think. (Few stereotypes, but more unknown/differentness.)


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:52 PM
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She's gorgeous, though I suppose that's fairly redundant when it comes to babies.

Surprisingly not true.

The rate is probably a lot higher than in the adult populace, but it's certainly not 100%.

The rate of gorgeousness in your own offspring is 100%, however.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:55 PM
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she's gorgeous, though I suppose that's fairly redundant when it comes to babies.

I thought this, but seeing the latest crop of babies in Cassidy's daycare (she just moved up to the toddler room) has proven definitively that not all babies are pretty.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 2:55 PM
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86 is exactly right. Newborns frequently look like shrunken old men. But, you know, cute shrunken old men.

The Gerber baby comes later.


Posted by: Tripp the Crazed | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:01 PM
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86, 87: she's gorgeous, though I suppose that's fairly redundant when it comes to babies if you squint

Amara.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:01 PM
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90

Okay, yes, she is gorgeous.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:07 PM
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91

Wow, yes, gorgeous.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:09 PM
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Not only gorgeous, but also near-certain to be so in 10, 20, 30, and 40 years. My god, what features!


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:21 PM
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93

Keep the baby far away from JRoth.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:22 PM
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Okay, yes, she is gorgeous.

But bald.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:26 PM
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After perusing some of the posts tagged "Joseph," I've become a bit jealous of his perspective on life. Fer instance:

Today at soccer practice Joseph was being ..... well, Joseph and one of the kids on his team sneered at him and said "Why do you act so weird?" Without missing a beat Joseph smiled and hopped from foot to foot and said "I act this way because I am showcasing my talent which, as you know, is being goofy."

And:
I swear to God that this is 100% true. One minute he's eating his lunch of applesauce and a peanut butter sandwich and the next he looks up at me and says: "If I want to attract a mate when I grow up then I'm going to have to get a wig."

What a great kid.


Posted by: Grumps | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:30 PM
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my boss graciously interrupts his FISA speech to let some other senators sneak a few statements in.

Are you in DC for the summer, mrh?


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:52 PM
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Further on the post tagged "Joseph":

The other night Joseph had put some rubber bouncy balls into a sock and was bouncing it around the room. As he did it he narrated it like a sportscaster. His monologue included him saying "That's right folks, I've really got my balls in a sock tonight!" and then later "I can't even believe how socky my balls are!"

He didn't understand why I kept giggling at him. Oh the innocence of youth.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 3:53 PM
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"That's right folks, I've really got my balls in a sock tonight!" and then later "I can't even believe how socky my balls are!"

Wow.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 4:04 PM
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Woo-hoo Sir K and yay aunthood! (And yay asilon on the reclamation of vocabulary in "enhanced aunthood")

OK, this is funny. I just clicked over to Flickr to admire the picture of the gorgeous Amara (whose name has fewer syllables than most of the Ethiopians I know), and when I logged in was greeted by a message saying that one of my own photos may be used for some tourist-map website.

It's the most mundane, garden-variety picture of a statue you can imagine, so I'm kind of amused at the thought that they couldn't find 1,361 nicer versions available for free all over the place. But whatever.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 4:05 PM
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The site keeps cracking me up:

When I picked Joseph up from school today he got in the car and said "I have a present for you in my backpack for Mother's Day. I won't tell you what it is but I'll give you a clue. It's in a pot, you have to water it and it's a flower."


Posted by: Grumps | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 4:12 PM
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She's shockingly gorgeous, SK. One day your sister may get bored of being told that, but I expect that will be a while away yet. (I took my lot for eye tests last week, and about 3/4 of the way through the 5 year old's test, the optician turned to me and said, "She's so cute!" Um, yes, she is, but she knows it.)

I wish my brother would acquire some children, I'm sure I'd love them more than my SIL's kids. (Is that a horrible thing to say? I have been letting my honestly bitchy side express herself all day, but I don't want to overdo it.)


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 4:23 PM
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99: I got one of those, for a printed map. Then realized that I logged in so infrequently that the copyright released deadline was 2 months gone.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 4:25 PM
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103

Is that a horrible thing to say?

No.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 4:28 PM
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||

my favorite example sentence of the day:

"Joanna stubbed out her cigarette with unnecessary fierceness."

I didn't even pay attention to what this was an example of because I was so busy writing notes to myself about how fierceness is RARELY unnecessary. If EVER.

|>


Posted by: Cecily | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 4:52 PM
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Babies:

"He's our kid, Mary, and we love him, but isn't that about the ugliest baby you ever saw?" A guy I used to know grew up hearing that line several times a year. He didn't seem terribly damaged. As a grownup he was average in looks.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 5:42 PM
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heebs, I'm now obsessed with this family's narrative. You and me, babe, we are internet-reading kindreds.


Posted by: Sybil Vane | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 6:35 PM
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Are you in DC for the summer, mrh?

Nope, working on the junior varsity team, as it were.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 06-26-08 8:53 PM
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80:

Sir Kraab, you weren't really clear on whether you knew about the attachment disorders and were wondering which ones may appear, or whether you want more information on attachment itself. Just in case it's the latter, Rumor Queen at the Chinese international adoption rumor site[1] has a bunch of book recommendations about attachment: http://www.chinaadopttalk.com/BookRecommendations.html

[1] International adoption from China has slowed dramatically since 2005, and some intending parents may wait five or more years for a referral. The support community grows with the wait.


Posted by: Pineapple | Link to this comment | 06-28-08 6:25 AM
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