Re: Brian

1

I'm in, but only because Spackerman assures me that my small upfront contribution will help him retrieve a very large and valuable spleen from his home country.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 4:24 PM
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I'm in because I feel bad about the 911 joke.


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 4:49 PM
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3

You know, if it weren't for this country's backwards gun insurance policy, this never would have happened. In every other industrialized country, guns are treated as a public good, not a private expense.

On preview, I may have misread Becks' post, but I'm posting anyway.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 4:59 PM
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4

I owe the world a couple of pints of blood anyway. My best wishes to poor Brian.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 5:21 PM
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5

2: Honestly, some people.

(Of course in the context of that thread, that comment was an 11 on the aptness scale.)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 5:37 PM
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You can always chop it up, toss it with olive oil, season with salt and pepper, and roast it. It's also a good vegetable to toss into mixed vegetable curries. (Drat! Wish I'd thought of that with my green curry.)


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 5:44 PM
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7

Oh boy! Wrong thread. I'm a genius.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 5:44 PM
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8

Not at all, RFTS. My spleen is now delicious.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 5:47 PM
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9

8 donates the blood of funny, public spiritedly.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 6:34 PM
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10

I just counted and I have 22 bloodbank t-shirts. These things add up as you get old. Now I suppose I could start refusing the free t-shirts, but there does seem to be some value in the symbolic reciprocity of caritas, it would feel as churlish as refusing to accept a drink after you have bought one for somebody else, and it is advertising.

Because I wear them everywhere. I long stopped asking myself exactly why I should get "all dressed up" to go to buy some celery or get the oil changed. Weddings & funerals are exceedingly rare, and I have enough shirts to cover jury duty.

I suppose there is some kind of pridefulness involved, which I will have to overcome with consistency, by wearing my white sleeveless pocketless t-shirts with cheap red lettering to whatever weddings and funerals might improbably arise.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:00 PM
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Incidentally, damn the oppressive capitalist state that demands by law that I look "nice" to condemn a person to trial, prison or death.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:09 PM
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I've never gotten a shirt in exchange for my blood. Only fig newtons.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:10 PM
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13

I feel guilty that I don't donate blood. I'm squeamish and don't like being light-headed. But still, I could suck it up and do it anyway. "Suck it up". Heh.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:27 PM
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14

You don't have to donate your own blood, heebie.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:32 PM
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You're awesome, bob. I actually really enjoyed the sensation of donating blood the one time I did it, but it turns out I can't do it anymore because of my Condition.


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:50 PM
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16

I feel guilty for not lying about not having had sex with men since 1970 or whateverthefuck. I'm not really kidding, either; the bigger thing to do would be to lie but every time I read the little form, the smaller cerebrocrat takes hold and says, fine, I'll just keep my fag blood then, fuckiz. Victimhood: more delicious than fig newtons!


Posted by: cerebrocrat | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:56 PM
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17

I'm sure Brian would appreciate it if more men had sex with each other on his behalf.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 7:58 PM
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but it turns out I can't do it anymore because of my Condition.

You're pregnant!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 8:00 PM
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I can't give blood either. Too bad. I'm still trying to parse 'bro's double negative in 16, in other news.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 8:05 PM
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20

Sell blood and donate the proceeds to bootstrapping a class action suit against attempted muggers.


Posted by: Econolicious | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 8:16 PM
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21

Fuck that. Give the muggers job training! And, you know, stern talking tos! And arguably jail sentences, but trying to obey the prohibitions against any & all in the post there.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 8:18 PM
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I'm kinda there with 16, but I didn't want to whine about my second class citizenship when, you know, a guy got shot.


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 8:52 PM
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Give the muggers job training
i would say, first find him and treat him as he did to BB, i mean shoot him twice with spleen removal and a complete recovery
that would teach him, the mugger
if BB would have died, knock-knock-knock on wood, request his life, i'd say, the mugger's


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 8:56 PM
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24

i'm curious too what Condition it might be
condolescences anyway
i had a condition of coffee deprivation today and slept all day intermittently


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 9:04 PM
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25

24: read if you (yourself) between the lines you can get there. It's a common condition.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 9:06 PM
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26

Stras has BSE.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 9:08 PM
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27

Stras has an Anal-Cranial Inversion.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 9:10 PM
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Stras has Ebola, people. EBOLA, PEOPLE.

"Ebola People": might be a slightly trite band name.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 9:16 PM
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i think i wrote here sometime ago that people were recruiting at our uni during that ebola outbreak
just to think about it, i could be long dead if were recruited then
coz i really thought about it like i'll see Africa! etc


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 9:33 PM
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strasmangelo jones: setting up your easy punchlines since 2007.


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 9:44 PM
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Heebie, go give blood. You don't have to watch, and you can tell them you'll get lightheaded before they start and they'll lie you all the way back and make a fuss over you. It's sort of nice.

I can't give blood any more either, unless I lie. Sigh.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 10:51 PM
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30: setting up easy punchlines is a Condition? Oh, fuck.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 07- 6-08 10:54 PM
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Best wishes to Brian. I'll make a contribution.

Re: blood, I refused to give for a few years in Solidarity With My Queer Brothers. I started back up eventually because people need blood despite homophobia, and I'm O neg and apparently have magical super clean blood they give to babies and cancer patients. There's some extremely common virus or antibody or something that I don't have.

The irony is that I have to lie to get them to accept my blood. Yes, I spent 6 months in England, but I don't have BSE, you idiots, because I'm a vegetarian. Yes, I've slept with men who've slept with men, but they got tested and I got tested, and I've been tested since. Genius system you've got, Red Cross.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07- 7-08 2:08 AM
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Yeah, last time I checked, I too would have to lie in order to give blood.

On Saturday, I worked a benefit show for the widow of a local musician who got stabbed recently at a gig out of state. It was very heartening, lots of stalwarts of the punk community came out, plus lots of kids. And plenty of people went above and beyond the $5 cover to donate extra. There was a great turnout even though the venue it was booked at had been forced to change 8 hours before showtime.

May Mr. Beutler's benefit appeal be similarly successful.


Posted by: minneapolitan | Link to this comment | 07- 7-08 5:10 AM
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35

I just dropped in to see what condition Stras' Condition was in.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 07- 7-08 7:47 AM
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36

Is it any 6 months in England that prevents you from giving blood or a particular time frame?

A friend of mien couldn't give blood, because she'd been to China before 93. This was a temporary thing though I guess she had to take certain drugs while there, and it takes a couple of years to get them out of your system.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 07- 7-08 8:17 AM
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I love the "Have you ever exchanged sex for drugs?" question. Does alcohol count?

Sometimes I wish I had to lie. I try not to answer too quickly. I guess my boring self will be bleeding for all you degenerates forever.


Posted by: Mo MacArbie | Link to this comment | 07- 7-08 8:57 AM
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38

Yeah, last time I checked, I too would have to lie in order to give blood.

Same here. Having had jaundice eight years ago does not mean I have viral hepatitis now. Especially since it was a side effect of mononucleosis.


Posted by: Auto-banned | Link to this comment | 07- 7-08 9:05 AM
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My veins collaps upon needle insertion, so I can't give blood (you should see the bruise I got last time). I keep thinking I should sign up to be a bone marrow donor as karmic penance, but it's supposed to hurt a lot and I'm a coward.


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 07- 7-08 10:45 AM
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