Re: What do you make of this?

1

Just him? Or they both adopted this new name?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:18 AM
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It was a common English adjective with no connection to the family tree.

Hung.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:20 AM
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I give up. How many letters? Geg.


Posted by: Jesurgislac | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:21 AM
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I'm helping a guy right now who is being given unmitigated grief by the DMV because he "couldn't" have legally changed his name when he got married.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:27 AM
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Morganatic?

If his wife didn't also change her name, I make of it that he's a bit of a dick. Unless his previous name was Shufflebottom and he just needed an excuse.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:28 AM
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No, I think they both changed their names to the new one. Start fresh!


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:33 AM
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That is weird. I considered changing my name (not to my wife's) when we got married but it was to a family name.

Contra OFE, I wouldn't say that it makes your friend a "dick" -- rather, I'd say it's classically "toolish."


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:34 AM
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Oh, 6 changes everything.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:34 AM
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You know what would be cool? Changing your name to The Man (or Woman) With No Name.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:35 AM
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If he were a tool in other ways, I'd see this as part of the problem. But-- let's just stipulate-- he's not a tool. Laid back, yes, maybe a little granola but not excessively so. That's what cracks me up about this.


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:38 AM
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But then I've always believed that the biggest mistake of Prince's career was not changing him name to ə.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:39 AM
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10: But-- let's just stipulate-- he's not a tool.

Observer bias?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:39 AM
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6: In that case, I wholly endorse the move! (In fact, I did so right here at Unfogged once, suggesting something like "Wildcats" as a new family team name. But I apparently don't know how to search the archives so I can't link...)


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:39 AM
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Hmm. I wonder if I would have reconsidered taking such a bold position if I'd read all the other comments concluding that the new name is "toolish" first. No, No I don't think so. You guys are wrong. It's cool.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:42 AM
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In fact, I did so right here at Unfogged once, suggesting something like "Wildcats" as a new family team name

Hook 'em Longhorns congrats woo!


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:42 AM
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Formally, what distinction do you make between a dick and a tool?

I've come across this occasionally - Picking a name of a mutually significant place or something. It's a bit of a stretch, but it's heart's in the right place.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:45 AM
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15: Wait, what now?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:46 AM
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Maybe his old name was too distinctive and he wants to lower his google profile.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:46 AM
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Did you ask him if he was having a laugh?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:47 AM
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Di, I'm not sure I can help you. Check Standpipe's blog?


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:50 AM
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both changed their names to the new one

I have friends who both grew up in small southern towns where their families comprised the entire Jewish populations of each one. When they married, they intended to both change their names to the Hebrew word for exile/outsider. However, the guy was the only son in his family and his parents nearly had aneurysms when he told them (despite the fact that their family name is one of the most common Jewish surnames out there).

So they didn't.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:50 AM
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These are the most common adjectives, according to Wikipedia and how common they are as surnames in the US, according to Social Security.

good (965)
new (2867)
first (15899)
last (13312)
long (91)
great (not in the top 55,000)
little (241)
own (not in the top 55,000)
other (50130)
old (12553)


Posted by: beamish | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:55 AM
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Formally, what distinction do you make between a dick and a tool?

Dickishness is perceptible to all races and classes. Toolishness can only be discerned by a small sub-set of highly educated middle class whites.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:57 AM
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20. This is Standpipe's blog. Di, Armsmasher is suggesting the appropriate form of congratulations on the occasion of the marriage of a couple who have changed their name to Longhorn.


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:57 AM
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23: Toolishness can only be discerned exhibited by a small sub-set of highly educated middle class whites.

Talking authentic artisanal toolishness that is.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:02 AM
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13: Funny, I also seem to remember suggesting the same thing, and I also can't find the thread where I did so. Co-credit?


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:04 AM
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No, I think they both changed their names to the new one. Start fresh!

It's always interesting to me to see what things bring out strong, Durkheimian reactions in defense of a naturalized social order. I know several people who have done this, and it's a doozy. Frankly, there is no good, independent reason not to do it --- no reason independent of sheer attachment to gendered conventions, anyway. And it upsets people in all kinds of funny ways. People without advanced degrees typically react as though the structure of the universe had been destabilized and claim "You can't do that" etc. People with advanced degrees are of course more sophisticated and know that such things are governed by social convention, so instead they launch sputtering, eyerolling attacks on the cultural capital of people who do this, claiming that their actions make them look like tools, wankers, poseurs, parvenus, etc.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:04 AM
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24: There's also a revenge factor I don't expect everyone to see right away.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:05 AM
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claiming that their actions make them look like tools, wankers, poseurs, parvenus, etc.

Which, of course, it does.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:05 AM
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Right, G, it's not like any of us occupy ground free of the social order.


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:07 AM
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29: But again, a good, practical solution for situations where she doesn't want to take his name and they don't want to hyphenate themselves into oblivion.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:09 AM
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Which, of course, it does.

Only if they change it to something toolish. If John Doe and Rachel Roe decide to go through life together as Mrs and Mr Smith/Wong/Mohammed, good luck to them. If they change their names to World Peace, or Hotstuff, then they're wankers.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:11 AM
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Does the new last name produce a full name that is especially euphonious? We're deciding what last name to give the forthcoming kidlets based on which sounds better with the first names we like.

Ooh, or do they now have really cool initials? I know a guy who named his son Ol/ver M/chael G****.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:11 AM
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24: Aha. Thanks.

28: Just shows what you know. The Wildcats surname does not derive from an actual athletic team name but from the mascot in High School Musical. I fully expect Troy and Gabriella to adopt it as their surname when they get married.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:12 AM
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We're deciding what last name to give the forthcoming kidlets

Just go with punctuation. One gets the last name [umlaut], the other gets [interrobang]. And then they can choose to pronounce it however they like.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:16 AM
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No, I think they both changed their names to the new one. Start fresh!

There is nothing even remotely dickish about this.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:17 AM
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Right, G, it's not like any of us occupy ground free of the social order.

It is only when we have managed to completely detach ourselves from any and all forms of attachment to the social order that we will finally be free!



Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:18 AM
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33: This reminds me of the story I heard about a couple who named their daughter Elizabeth Harmony [Surname]. Guess how the couple met!


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:20 AM
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30, 31: Often enough, there's a perfectly reasonable explanation--"new start"--once you ask. I just meant that I think you could find an example that fit G's description at which we'd all look askance.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:20 AM
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39: Well sure, but that correlates with toolish people, not with people who change their names.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:23 AM
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37: yeah, I think my point was that doing this, carping about it, and being the sort of guy who says "Frankly, there is no good, independent reason not to do it"-- all those are equally bound up in the cultural capital stuff. I think one reason I predict a high but not perfect correlation between this kind of thing and irritation is that people who do this kind of thing also tend to think "aha, with this simple gesture I've stepped outside of my culture; now I am truly a citizen of the world!" or something inane like this. Whereas this guy is aware enough to know that he's not doing that, he just wants this cool name. So, ok, go nuts, and I'll give you some ribbing about it, and we're all good.


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:26 AM
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It is only when we have managed to completely detach ourselves from any and all forms of attachment to the social order that we will finally be free!

And really bored. 'Now what?'

My judgment whether the person is a tool depends entirely on the choice of adjective. I'm hoping for Perky, personally.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:26 AM
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Ol/ver M/chael G****.

Zachariah Ol/ver M/chael G**** would be even better (if a little toolish).


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:27 AM
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I can do name changes for those people who live in Virginia. Cala, wouldnt you like to be called Toolishly Perky?


Posted by: Will | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:29 AM
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Zachariah Ol/ver M/chael G**** would be even better

Don't think we didn't suggest it.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:30 AM
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I would pay real folding green money to see an episode of the Dick von Tool Show.


max
['Preferably followed by the Granola Wanker Variety Hour.']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:30 AM
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21: I know someone, the child of Greek immigrants, whose family name means "stranger" in Greek. That isn't the name her father was born with, but it is the custom of those who leave the smallish island on which both her father and mother were born and raised to take that as their name when they move away.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:33 AM
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IIRC in Minnesota our marriage license gave us both a free legal name change if we wanted. I think the law had been changed to be fair to both genders.

I had some clever ideas which would be funny last names when filling out forms such as NA or Unknown or Left Blank. Obviously I stifled any such urges when the time came because we all know what people think about other people who think they are SOOOO funny and we all know how important it is to think about what other people will think of us.


Posted by: Tripp | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:33 AM
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45 and previous: I have friends who met at a certain band's show who named their son R***** E*** M********. They don't advertise the fact, and it actually took me a while to figure it out.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:34 AM
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(I wrote this comment 90 minutes ago and then got busy, but I'm posting it anyway, without reading the thread.)

You guys are ridiculously conservative and judgmental, even if you're only 10% serious about these accusations of toolishness.

Non-exhaustive list of reasons one might change one's name:

1. Abuse or estrangement with parent whose name one carries.

2. Consistent professional or informal confusion with a more notorious person who carries your name. (Especially significant if you are poor and the confusion is happening with criminal background checks for jobs and/or law enforcement entities.)

3. Affiliation with a person -- adoptive parent, last remaining family member, new spouse, adopted child -- or new community/tribe, particularly out of love, emotion, or practical considerations in protecting another person.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:35 AM
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42: I just hope he didn't go with "Pussy".

(Like "full of pus", duh. What did you think I meant?)


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:36 AM
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Whereas this guy is aware enough to know that he's not doing that, he just wants this cool name.

It's all about creating a uniquely branded experience for the people that you meet. Which is why, btw, I think that Barack Obama should change his name to just "Obama."


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:36 AM
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50: I don't think you read the thread.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:37 AM
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Labs, have you considered that he's CIA?


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:40 AM
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or maybe running from his criminal drug lord past?


Posted by: Michael | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:40 AM
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I wrote this comment 90 minutes ago and then got busy, but I'm posting it anyway, without reading the thread.

Yeah, that might have been a mistake. People seem to be accepting "new start," after all.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:43 AM
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51: Wasn't that Uncle Fester's full name? Uncle Fester Pussy?

Ewww.


Posted by: Tripp | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:46 AM
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I wrote this comment 90 minutes ago and then got busy

Were any HR people involved?


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:47 AM
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I met a couple who took the Roman numeral equivalent of the date of their marriage as their new name. October 1, 2000. Pretty good!

My fiancee wants to take my last name, which makes me slightly uncomfortable. She has no interest in keeping her name, or in having a different name from her children. I like the Latin American naming convention that was discussed here before. She's said she's open to taking a new name, but I haven't figured out one that feels right. It's a tricky business.

Was 21 Auslander? I like that.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:52 AM
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She's said she's open to taking a new name, but I haven't figured out one that feels right.

Well for heaven's sake don't ask this bunch for any suggestions! I'm serious!!


Posted by: Tripp | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:54 AM
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October 1, 2000.

Ximm?


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:55 AM
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27 is a good point. When I married, everyone from my hometown assumed I changed my name; everyone from my current institution assumed of course I wouldn't. Everyone I knew from college asked.

I've been playing around with professional names, including using initials, because philosophy is so hard on white men. (Much to the amusement of my colleagues. 'Why initials? Everyone knows Female Philosopher X who uses initials is really [Her First Name], don't they?)


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:56 AM
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philosophy is so hard on white men

The hard-on thread is over there, Cala.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:57 AM
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Is 59.1 a joke? Mr. Ximm?

Inspired my that, I'm going to name my kid 09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0, and call her "Information wants to be free" for short.


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:58 AM
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How about a one word rock star name, like Edge or Slash or Sting or Flea?


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:58 AM
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65: or a name that combines all the one word rock star names, like Edgesting Fleaslash.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:59 AM
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She's said she's open to taking a new name, but I haven't figured out one that feels right.

Wrongshore?


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:59 AM
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Perhaps some specifically philosophical term, like Modal or Mere.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:03 AM
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62: I think it's pretty common for academics (and performers, for similar reasons) to not change their names upon marrying because of the publishing history. Maybe the assumption in that direction comes from this.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:03 AM
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somewhat on topic, I met a guy who had only a single name, and no end of trouble for it with bureaucracies.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:05 AM
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59.1 is not a joke and 61 is right.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:06 AM
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no end of trouble for it with bureaucracies

Oh, I'll bet. I can attest that going by one's middle name creates headaches enough.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:08 AM
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Frankly, there is no good, independent reason not to do it --- no reason independent of sheer attachment to gendered conventions, anyway

I believe catherine complained in a previous thread about just this (both partners take a new name) that had someone in her family tree done it, she would have had a much harder time retracing her ancestry and discovering that she's descended in part from a Chinese immigrant, etc. I'm not sure it's a gendered convention to want continuity of name across generations (and while obviously the way names do get changed is gendered, some continuity is retained by the fact that the maiden name can stay on—firstname middlename maidenname marriedname isn't that unusual, is it?).


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:08 AM
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I believe most Indonesians only have one name. OTOH, an uncle who visited the USA before WWII had problems because he only had one first name, i.e he was Norman Young, not Norman Q. Young. Form fillers were perplexed, and wrote him up as Norman NMI (No middle initial) Young.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:08 AM
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"Auslander" isn't Hebrew, Wrongshore.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:09 AM
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Both of AB's best friends are talking pretty seriously about changing their names, independent of marriage. The one merely wants to change her first and middle, but the other would change her last, as her father ran out on her when she was 16, and no one else in her family still has that name. Pretty sure she wants to use her mom's maiden name.

We hyphenated for the kids (but each kept our own), choosing order based on euphony. For us it was kind of obvious which was more euphonious, but friends tend to guess wrong (esp. her old friends, as her name comes last but they of course give it precedence).

We very briefly considered a third (or composite) name, but dismissed it as silly. Actually, our most obvious composite name would imply a very clear, completely incorrect religious/ethnic identity, so that made the idea easier to dismiss.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:10 AM
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The thing about taking a new name is that in most cases it's a deracinating gesture. We would feel bound by history and community to pick a name of Jewish/Yiddish origins (my own last name is Ukrainian Jewish, hers German replacing Polish). So far the leading contender is "Mazltov", which was inspired by a hideous engagement gift.

I realize how some would do this sort of thing to escape history or ethnicity, but that's not my bag.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:10 AM
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We would feel bound by history and community to pick a name of Jewish/Yiddish origins (my own last name is Ukrainian Jewish, hers German replacing Polish). So far the leading contender is "Mazltov", which was inspired by a hideous engagement gift.

How about "Chelm"?


Posted by: CN | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:11 AM
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59, 61: Now that I think of it, Vixximmi is a pretty good name.

I mean, not for a human family, but for something. Our pet extraterrestrial, maybe.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:12 AM
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I'm not sure it's a gendered convention to want continuity of name across generations

Always taking the husband's last name makes it easier to trace ancestry back through the fathers' line, but maternal ancestry is still hidden, no?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:12 AM
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I mentioned that in the very same sentence, Di.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:16 AM
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78 is very good for reasons that should be linked. Ostropoler also comes to mind.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:17 AM
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she's descended in part from a Chinese immigrant

vlog star catherine? Was she talking about Genghis Khan?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:18 AM
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I guess we could take "Xiixxmmviistein" and split the difference.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:18 AM
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I'm naming my kid Theodora if it's a girl, and if the poor bastard is male, [null]. Take that, dbs of the world!


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:18 AM
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Always taking the husband's last name makes it easier to trace ancestry back through the fathers' line, but maternal ancestry is still hidden, no?

Assuming perfect documentation, you would expect to find the woman's maiden name on the marriage certificate, and trace back from that. But you're right, it's another potential failure point.

My grandfather had a different birth name, because he was illegitimate and his name was changed when his mother eventually married an unrelated bloke a few years later. This presents no real problem in genealogy, because we have the certificates.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:19 AM
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she's descended in part from a Chinese immigrant

vlog star catherine? Was she talking about Genghis Khan?

read better not see this!


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:21 AM
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You guys are ridiculously conservative and judgmental

Welcome to Unfogged.


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:21 AM
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Welcome to Unfogged.

Thanks


Posted by: beamish | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:22 AM
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53 to 88.


Posted by: CN | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:25 AM
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27

"... Frankly, there is no good, independent reason not to do it --- no reason independent of sheer attachment to gendered conventions, anyway. ..."

Sure there is. Laziness. Changing your name involves a certain amount of hassle.


Posted by: James B. Shearer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:26 AM
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I like the idea of arranging one's own life so as to simplify things for generations of future genealogists.


Posted by: ed bowlinger | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:27 AM
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I don't think you read the thread.

That's okay, I've read a couple hundred of the others.


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:27 AM
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A friend of my sons took a new first and last name of his own choice when he was 18. Both parents were cool with that.

His original first name had been a hippy name, which he replaced with a cool biblical name.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:27 AM
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Changing your name involves a certain amount of hassle.

Not a small amount, either.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:28 AM
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93: wait, I... huh?


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:28 AM
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which he replaced with a cool biblical name

Presumably not "Dorcas", then.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:30 AM
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Presumably not "Dorcas", then.

Beelzebub Clawhammer.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:31 AM
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His original first name had been a hippy name, which he replaced with a cool biblical name.

from "Zippity" to "Zebedee"?


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:32 AM
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I can attest that going by one's middle name creates headaches enough

I think this can be managed by using the first initial for anything semi-official. But then you have to be extra careful to guard against toolishness, as the use of an initial or numbers always leads one down that dark road. You wouldn't have to worry about that much though, apo.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:32 AM
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Ezra 10:4.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:33 AM
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His original first name had been a hippy name, which he replaced with a cool biblical name.

DweezilNebuchadnezzar *

* Woo! Spelled right without checking!


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:33 AM
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100: The local newspaper did an interview with some of the kids in the 8th grade play. When the reporter took my name, I asked that she include my middle initial. Then the other kids asked for their middle initials. Then I said it was cool, she didn't need to use my middle initial.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:34 AM
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guard against toolishness, as the use of an initial or numbers always leads one down that dark road

Hey!

(Actually, I don't go by the initial IRL)


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:35 AM
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Numbers


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:35 AM
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Always taking the husband's last name makes it easier to trace ancestry back through the fathers' line, but maternal ancestry is still hidden, no?

Not if your ancestors are Catholic. RC marriage and baptismal records typically give the wife/mother's family name. Though it's understood that legally a woman adopts her husband's name upon marriage, in the parish register she will still be identified with her family of origin.

Presumably some other religious denominations do something similar. State-produced records (e.g., census returns) tend to completely erase the woman's pre-marriage identity.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:35 AM
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Not Nimrod either.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:36 AM
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Same question as 59; my SO wants to take my name, mostly because she doesn't like her own very much (nothing wrong with the family, but the name is of very recent origin and the name is generic.) My name is only slightly less generic, and I feel kind of weirded out about the idea of someone else switching to my name. My mother never changed her name, so that's what I'm used to, and I don't remember it ever being a practical problem as a kid (I have my father's name).


Posted by: needapseud | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:38 AM
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"Nebuchadrezzar" is correct. The "n" is an error. Likewise, "Moctezuma". Likewise "Chinggis".


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:38 AM
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I think the coolest Biblical name is "Sheshbazzar".


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:38 AM
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Nimrod would be a great name though. Melchizadek?


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:39 AM
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It's been 70 comments now, and it appears that nobody understands 38.


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:40 AM
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"Nimrod" and "Abner" are much more common names than you would think.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:41 AM
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Nowt wrong wi' Abner.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:42 AM
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Melchizadek is better divided between two children.


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:42 AM
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I still don't understand "brown chicken brown cow".


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:42 AM
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The popularity of Abel as a given name has always puzzled me, since Abel doesn't make out so well.

I don't understand 38.

Bildad and Hodad would be excellent twin names.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:43 AM
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I had a college student once who gave his baby boy the middle name Danger. When asked why, he replied that he wanted to set the kid up so that some day, when he's in a bar, chatting up a hottie, he can say "my middle name is Danger," and actually be able to pull out his driver's license and prove it. (Presumably that would clinch the deal, leading to, well, you know.)

Now that's a caring father, planning for the long term.


Posted by: mistersmed | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:44 AM
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116: they are rare heritage breeds, thus making them more attractive to high SES white people, ergo, sexier.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:44 AM
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81: Oh. My attention span didn't carry that far.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:44 AM
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116: Racist.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:45 AM
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I got 38. Want me to tell you?


Posted by: mistersmed | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:45 AM
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re 38: E. Harmony [Surname]


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:45 AM
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I am understanding of all internet comments.


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:46 AM
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Bildad and Hodad would be excellent twin names.

also for Jews, "Gomer" and "Golem".


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:46 AM
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112: or, everyone did, and no one thought it was remarkable.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:48 AM
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"Gog" and "Magog".


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:48 AM
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no end of trouble for it with bureaucracies.

Some bureaucracies will helpfully solve this problem for you by assigning First Name Unknown. I can't tell you how many Fnus I've met.

You would think database administrators would be accommodating this issue by now, but we're still stuck with stupid 20-character, no-punctuation-mark, both-names-required malarky. Bah.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:48 AM
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Now that's a caring father, planning for the long term.

My parents gave me a first and middle name combination that corresponds to the first and last name of a well-known leader of the early labor movement, giving me a tremendous potential advantage if I ever ran for Congress in the heavily union-influenced district I grew up in.

But then I became a pot-smoking Ivy League liberal, thus ruining it for everyone.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:49 AM
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I met a couple who took the Roman numeral equivalent of the date of their marriage as their new name. October 1, 2000.

Bob and Emma Kalendsoctobrisaburbeconditemmmdccliii? Catchy.

Maher-shalal-hashbaz means "he who makes haste to the slaughter". Also can be shortened to "Mash".


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:49 AM
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Gargantua and Pantagruel.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:49 AM
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My middle name, although not intended this way, has provided much fodder for "[My middle name] is my middle name"-style levity in my life.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:49 AM
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118: I know someone who saddled the kid with the whole "Danger is my middle name" dealio, too. I wonder if lots of nerds have done it.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:50 AM
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Maher Shalal Hash Baz is also a really fantastic Japanese band.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:50 AM
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129: good lord, you're not Stephen King's son, are you?


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:51 AM
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Holofernes is easily the best biblical name for a boy.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:51 AM
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I wonder if it's easier to get married and change one's name than it is to change one's name straight up.


Posted by: Currence | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:51 AM
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Leviathan


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:52 AM
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"brown chicken brown cow"

Because there's no sprog to imitate Alvin the chipmunk of commercials and film trailers for you, Alvin himself imitating a now-ironic porn convention of having slap bass soundtracks.

I don't understand why this isn't objectionable-- an imbecile smutty joke aimed at parents in a kids movie is OK, even though it gets kids repeating something that would be objectionable (due to porn being commercialized sex, not due to implicit sex reference) if the kids understood what they were saying? Say a Girls Gone Wild line of clothing aimed at kids (who didn't get the reference) would generate apoplexy, but irritating smutty Alvin is OK?

Of course, there's a lot I don't understand.

Anyway, say it with a sing-song intonation to evoke "bow-chicka-wow-wow"


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:52 AM
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Behemoth.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:52 AM
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(Actually, I don't go by the initial IRL)

(Neither does my dad, except on business cards and official forms. It's cool.)


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:52 AM
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I know somebody who's changing her name now, several years after getting married, and after the birth of her child. I assume she wants her name to match her child's. As to why this is only coming up now, couldn't say.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:53 AM
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129: Heh. If I am guessing correctly, my parents sometimes called me this as a nickname when I was little, because of a, without possibly giving your names away, let's say prominent facial feature shared by me and said labor leader.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:54 AM
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Incidentally, a Google search for "hodad bildad" turns up some fucking weird shit.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:54 AM
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I had a college student once who gave his baby boy the middle name Danger. When asked why, he replied that he wanted to set the kid up so that some day, when he's in a bar, chatting up a hottie, he can say "my middle name is Danger," and actually be able to pull out his driver's license and prove it.

One hopes he would say "Danger is my middle name," instead.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:54 AM
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Abaddon. Then, if she turned out nice after all, you could call her Abby. AND NO ONE NEED EVER KNOW.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:54 AM
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I've already had that explanation and it doesn't work. Is it a pop culture reference?


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:54 AM
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Maher Shalal Hash Baz is also a really fantastic Japanese band.

I've still been unable to find any albums by them, Ben. If your secret is something other than legal purchases or your work at the radio station, I want to hear it.


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:57 AM
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141, cont.: Actually, it was really weird when I found out my dad went by his middle name all the time. When I asked if he just never liked his first name, I found out that his parents didn't even like his first name all that much, they just really loved his middle name but felt a monosyllabic first name wouldn't work with our monosyllabic family name*. So my dad was given a first name that no one would ever use, except the occasional junk mail.

* This is odd to me given that my dad's dad has the actual, factual given name Jack and seems find with it. Which tells one a lot about my family a couple generations back.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:57 AM
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I've already had that explanation and it doesn't work. Is it a pop culture reference?

It's a standard way of referring to generic cheesy porn-movie music.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:00 AM
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135: no
143: good guess


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:00 AM
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I wonder if lots of nerds have done it.

Yes.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:01 AM
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The popularity of Abel as a given name has always puzzled me, since Abel doesn't make out so well.

God liked him though. A good name if you're only planning to have one child.


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:02 AM
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My parents gave me a first and middle name combination that corresponds to the first and last name of a well-known leader of the early labor movement, giving me a tremendous potential advantage if I ever ran for Congress in the heavily union-influenced district I grew up in.

I assume it's not "Terence Powderly", but I always thought that was a great name.


Posted by: CN | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:04 AM
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151: was that the right labor leader, though?


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:04 AM
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I've still been unable to find any albums by them, Ben.

One source that also has their collaboration with Bill Wells. Boomkat has the album with two of my favorite MSHB tunes ("White Dream" and "What's Your Business Here, Elijah?"), among many others. Even Amazon has Blues du Jour used.

Forced Exposure I just went straight to, since their URL scheme is pretty uniform, but to find the Blues du Jour vendors my secret lay in plain sight.

There's even a bittorrent link in that search, not that I endorse such methods.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:05 AM
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150: see, I don't watch cheesy porn. I'm porn-friendly but don't like movies much.

If the Coen brothers did a porn movie I'd watch it.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:09 AM
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It's always interesting to me to see what things bring out strong, Durkheimian reactions in defense of a naturalized social order.

I knew instantly upon reading this sentence that the post was by Gonerill, before seeing his name.


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:10 AM
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156: The only part of this comment that was responsive is unseeded, IIRC.


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:10 AM
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My father was not given a middle name so he uses his last initial with no period after it. I have always thought this was way cool.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:13 AM
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157: "O Brother, Whore Out Thou"


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:13 AM
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I have no middle name.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:14 AM
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My parents figured my first name was long enough.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:14 AM
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163: "Orthomyxovirida" is a pretty long name, it's true.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:15 AM
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157: "A Country With No Men"


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:16 AM
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Security Breach! Security Breach! Now I have to go redact 164.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:16 AM
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"Erecting Arizona"


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:17 AM
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162: Me neither. Thanks to this thread I've decided to start insisting that I have no first name and begin using my (current) first name as my middle name.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:19 AM
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And I have a ridiculous first name.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:20 AM
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Barton Fink is too obvious to be worth doing, surely.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:22 AM
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"Blonde Simple"


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:24 AM
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Furgo


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:25 AM
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The Dicksucker Proxy


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:26 AM
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The Pudsucker Proxy


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:26 AM
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(FUCK too obvious, that's what I say.)


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:26 AM
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Heh.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:26 AM
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"The Hudproxy Sucker"


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:27 AM
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Damn.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:27 AM
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"The Cocksucker is Roxy."

Upon preview: aww, shit


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:27 AM
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The Hudsucker Doxy


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:28 AM
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The Big Lebowchickabowwow


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:28 AM
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No Cuntry for Old Men

The Big Leboneski (or just leave the original unchanged)


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:28 AM
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156: The only part of this comment that was responsive is unseeded, IIRC.

Oh, well, if you want free stuff, use soulseek.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:28 AM
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Is this the greatest multiple pwning of all time? Conditions were perfect.


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:28 AM
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Miller's Cockring


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:31 AM
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Have to move into the obscure titles now.

The Ladypleasers


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:32 AM
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The Man Who Was Bare


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:33 AM
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The Coen brothers should do the Monica Goodling women in prison movie, with Scarlet Johannson.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:35 AM
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Dammit, you all took the good ones (though I would have gone with "Butt Simple"), but 185 is better than I could have done, so fair play. So what am I left with? "Whorego"?"The Man Who Wasn't Straight"? Bah.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:37 AM
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Oh, well, if you want free stuff, use soulseek.

I've been trying to get out of the torrent/p2p game and into rapidshare—because my college's IT people can sometimes throttle downloads with those programs, and because of a threat I received from HBO. Oh, well.


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:39 AM
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The Big Lesbo Ski


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:40 AM
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Buck Angel in: The Penis That Wasn't There


Posted by: CN | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:42 AM
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191: To appeal to the large overlaps between skiing fetishists, BBW fans, and lesbian porn fans.


Posted by: Rob Helpy-Chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:43 AM
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193: a huge market, to be sure.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:44 AM
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192 reminds me of a song from Gravity's Rainbow, "The Penis He Thought Was His Own."


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:45 AM
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See?


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:46 AM
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191: Brilliant; you're in the wrong business. Except if you're in crap porn naming business, in which case: could you hook me up with a job?


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:52 AM
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Also, "erecting" Arizona? No, it's Raping Arizona or nothing.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:53 AM
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We're deciding what last name to give the forthcoming kidlets based on which sounds better with the first names we like.

mrh, that's what we did. We each kept our own names - they sounded stupid together (but have since forged an interweb family identity which is an anagram of the two surnames) - and Kid A got C's surname which made her name nicely alliterative*. Kid B was going to get my surname (more alliteration), but when she was born she ended up with a different name, and with no aesthetic preference either way, we decided we'd rather the sibs had the same surname. If they sounded better we would have hyphenated.

* And yes, Nicely Alliterative is an odd name for a child, especially as we don't live in North London ...


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:55 AM
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a first name that no one would ever use, except the occasional junk mail.

This is actually pretty handy. I worked for a guy who was A. R/chard G-. Like Po-Mo's dad, he used the initial officially, but not practically. He simply hated the name (Alfred - I worked for him for several years before his snotty son revealed the ugly truth).

First/Last name balance is tricky. AB rejected George because George Roth sounds so blah (to her). The fact that this wouldn't, in fact, be his name (as I said, we hyphenate, getting 3 syllables) cut no ice with her.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:59 AM
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200 was supposed to clarify that the unused first name is useful for screening out telemarketers and the like.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:02 AM
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198: Sorry, but I'm going to have to go with Glazing Arizona.


Posted by: ed bowlinger | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:03 AM
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198 no longer sounds like a porn movie I would enjoy watching.


Posted by: Rob Helpy-Chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:06 AM
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The best is when mailing lists decide that 8 letters is sufficient for a first name, and so I get a mid-syllable truncated name. Yes, that sounds like you know me well.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:09 AM
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C is Christophe in many places, which sounds very ooh la la. Shame he's Welsh.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:21 AM
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Is asilon not married? Shacking up?


Posted by: Will | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:23 AM
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202-3: I'm sorry if I offended your porn-naming sensibilities, but, to me, the integrity of the pun comes before the morality of the acts depicted in the movie described. I would admit that Glazing Arizona would be the superior name if I knew what glazing was. I'm not at all sure that I want to.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:24 AM
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I would admit that Glazing Arizona would be the superior name if I knew what glazing was.

It means dipping someone in a sugary batter or frosting. Duh.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:28 AM
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if I knew what glazing was

Urbandictionary.com is your friend. Or enemy, as the case may be.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:29 AM
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206 - married, Will. Did I sound like I wasn't? 12 long years, as my daughter wrote in my last anniversary card.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:31 AM
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If you rely on URbanDictionary, every real title of every movie, as well as every word in the English language, could be a porn title anyway.


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:31 AM
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209: I like my definition better.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:32 AM
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Actually what's toolish is assuming that people must be tools just because they do things a little differently than "normal."


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:33 AM
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I always thought you were. But I thought some thread alluded to you not being married.


Posted by: Will | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:33 AM
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And I see that I was pwned way upthread by Gonerill. Thank god.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:38 AM
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214: You're remembering something I said in the 'dsquared got married' thread. I didn't say Asilon wasn't married, I said she'd made fun of me for assuming she was, which had led me to conclude that UK default assumptions about whether a middleclass couple with kids would be married were less strong than ours (and therefore to correctly assume based on that and on some things he'd said that dsquared and his partner weren't married).


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:39 AM
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205. Moi aussi. Sick of it, TBH. Can't the mailing companies buy some kit with more than 256k memory.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:39 AM
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we decided we'd rather the sibs had the same surname

Yes, this seems non-negotiable to me. Otherwise, it would be way too obvious which child we each favored.

213: Oh, god.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:39 AM
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214: Yeah, LB recently mentioned that asilon had twitted her for assuming that she was married. Which I took to mean that asilon wasn't, but of course asilon need not have been unmarried to twit someone for such an assumption.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:41 AM
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216: Pwno, pwnere, pwnui, pwntum -- by the lady herself, even.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:42 AM
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LB uses twitter?


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:42 AM
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Assuming perfect documentation, you would expect to find the woman's maiden name on the marriage certificate, and trace back from that

And if both people change their name on marriage, then you'd expect to find *that* on the marriage certificiate, so.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:43 AM
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213: Oh, god.

No worries, I won't be around to try your infinite patience today, as I am going out for a long bike ride.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:45 AM
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My daughter has my surname and my son has my wife's. So far we have had no problems. I rather like it as a solution to The Name Problem.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:45 AM
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221. Twit!


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:45 AM
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asilon need not have been unmarried to twit

I've never met asilon's husband, but from meeting her, I'd bet he's not a twit.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:47 AM
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Otherwise, it would be way too obvious which child we each favored.

Keep it loose, and it'll be way easier to withdraw and bestow your favor. "If you get Daddy a beer, I'll give you my last name to show that I like you best." Then again, probably not the right incentive structure, unless your last name is Icanhazfreecandynowyes.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:51 AM
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Otherwise, it would be way too obvious which child we each favored.

As if the first names Aristos and Hellspawn weren't indication enough?


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:53 AM
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I suppose 224 works best for n even.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:55 AM
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The hypothetical future children will have shivbunny's last name, as it is important to him and I couldn't care less.

I am not sure what the default assumptions are in Canada, but shivbunny's unmarried sister is pregnant, and still dating the dad, and we're all mostly relieved that she isn't rushing to marry the guy. (He's nice, but bad, bad reason to rush into marriage.)


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:55 AM
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227: I have somehow given birth to a child who, at 6, has decided to start making a pot of coffee for us if he wakes up first. Occasionally he'll bring cups into the bedroom to wake us up.

I'm waiting for the meteor to hit to even out the karma on this one. </shameless, albeit somewhat mystified, bragging>


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:55 AM
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Where is the resident digger into ancestors, Mr. Napi?

Take the man's name, people. It is just the way it is supposed to be.


Posted by: Will | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:57 AM
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231: he's just setting you up for when he spikes it with rohypnol and sells the TV for yu-gi-oh cards.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:59 AM
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"Take my husband's name . . . please."


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:59 AM
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231: I can't even operate our coffee maker - AB drinks it, I don't. Fortunately, she doesn't want/need/expect it first thing, so I'm not missing out on any points by being incapable of what is, evidently, child's work.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:03 PM
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Hey Sifu, I just did something to my Y key. It stills works, as you can see, but it requires jiggling the cover into the right position and holding it in place while hitting it. So, if I type your Ts from now on, would you type my Ys?


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:03 PM
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YYYYYYYYYou betcha, Kraabyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:04 PM
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231: Wow. Is it good coffee?


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:05 PM
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I confess that I occasionally fret over what Rah and I will do about the names if we get a legal marriage.

On the junk mail tip, I often use my pseud as my name for signing up for things online which leads to the occasional junk mail addressed to my pseud. The best was a postcard from Playboy, of all people, featuring some forgettable cheerleader type with the text "We're taking it off for you, ROBUST N. MCMANLYPANTS." It lived on our fridge for a long, long time.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:05 PM
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232.2 is just wrong.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:06 PM
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I'm sorry if I'm disturbing 231's saccharine utopia, but I thought I should acknowledge that 202 was right. By all means, feel superior, but teach him to open wine before you do so again.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:07 PM
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239: if you both legally change your last name to "McManlypants" I'll give you a hundred dollars.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:07 PM
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238: Meets my standards -- 3 scoops of El Pico in the filter, pour in a pot of water and hit the switch. It comes out the same as when I make it. It's not a high-skill process, but that he does it at all is boggling me a bit.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:08 PM
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236 reminds me of an entirely tangential story: At a hostel in Germany, a California girl yelled over to the manager from the lobby's computer--"The 'y' key is broken." The manager yelled back that it had been switched with the 'z'--"Oh, thanks." Moments later, "It's still broken"--manager walks over, points at the keyboard--"Oh, oh now I see, thanks."


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:08 PM
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I'm thinking seriously of changing my last name to McManlypants just for the sheer joy of it.


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:10 PM
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LB, that's a really cute story. Karma is probably going to bite your ass. But it's very cute.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:11 PM
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237: Cool. These are for later, in case you need one when I'm not around:
t t t t t
T T T T T
τ τ τ τ τ

Too bad you're not missing one of the groovier looking letters:
φ
ξ
Ω
ψ


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:12 PM
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I'm also missing q and z at home, actually.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:13 PM
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Perfect!


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:14 PM
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231 is completely awesome (and drastically increases the odds that Rah will one day want children).


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:15 PM
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and drastically increases the odds that Rah will one day want children

alternatively, soon you'll be able to buy a cheap household robot to do it.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:17 PM
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Typical Sir Kraab: free and easy with the tease, but stops before you get to the Big O.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:17 PM
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235: Neither can I operate ours. (CA got some elaborate espresso machine.) This is delightful, as I am now presented with a quadruple espresso each morning. Of course, CA gets up earlier than I do and enjoys waking me up by burning the tip of my nose with the coffee cup.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:18 PM
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252: Groan.

RMcMP, it would be cheaper to get a coffee pot that has a timer.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:21 PM
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251: But would a cheap household robot be willing to share its opinions on Pokemon, the Teen Titans, and potential practical uses for taekwondo training in later life? With the richness of detail Newt can command?

I think not.

(Admittedly, this may sway Rah's opinion on kids back in the other direction.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:25 PM
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256! Sorry.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:27 PM
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Admittedly, this may sway Rah's opinion on kids back in the other direction.

Exactly. I wasn't claiming a drop in replacement.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:27 PM
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Soup biscuit wasn't claiming that he'd be a drop-in replacement for a child,but he will make you a cup of coffee from time to time.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:30 PM
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253: Yet people still bitch about the patriarchy. Mystifying,


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:30 PM
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258: but only if you're nice to me


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:31 PM
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how very different notion of karma
karma doesn't mean to equalize, balance one's state of being to some universal average imo
if you are happy you should expect some misfortune, that is a kind of superstitious feeling, maybe very western type
we also know this feeling of course (tsagaan xel am), but it's different from the concept of karma (uiliin ur)


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:45 PM
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As long as you're pontificating, what is karma?


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:55 PM
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During one of his recent anxiety-fits about what to do with his difficult-to-spell and inconsistently spelled, two-part last name that includes an honorific that is kinda embarrassing, kinda part of the name, and kinda impossible for non-Iranians to figure out, I suggested to my honey that he take my one-syllable last name, which suggests he descends from Scottish Highlanders. He demurred. But the offer stands!


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:55 PM
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While I'm randomly bragging on Newt, I just got him and Sally playing Settlers of Catan with me this weekend. I may no longer need adult friends.

(And I was just being superstitious, rather than seriously invoking karma in any way that would imply that I knew what I was talking about.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 12:58 PM
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I kept my name. Kicking-me-right-now-future-child will just have my husband's. Shouldn't ancestor-seekers want everyone to hyphenate indefinitely?


Posted by: Katherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:01 PM
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264.1: Ok, that's just straight-up awesome. I would totally babysit your kids now. Settlers has become the "what the hell, we've got an hour to waste" activity in my apartment this summer. Surprisingly still feasible with two people playing 4 characters, but just causing so much heartache when one of your colors has to screw the other over.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:01 PM
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As far as I am concerned, you take the better of the two names, unless one of you is nobility or something. As much as I wish my name were "Max Power", I decline to make up a name out of whole cloth.

P.S.:264 is awesome.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:02 PM
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264 aha, i got it, sorry
just thought that maybe karma is understood that way
it's just you'd get what you do, good or bad
but not reverse


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:04 PM
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261: It's just a superstitious American usage, here, I think.

Settles of Catan is a fine game but the first time I played it I wanted to know, why, since I was buying army cards, I wasn't permitted to invade their lousy town already.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:06 PM
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I just got him and Sally playing Settlers of Catan

Keegan looooooves that game. We play it all the time.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:08 PM
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Now that I see there are multiple Settlers fans among the tariat, I feel that Mrs. Breath is double bragging, which is wrong. Go back to how much you loathe your job! Happiness is depressing.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:09 PM
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She doesn't hate her job anymore, fm. I think you're out of luck.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:12 PM
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265

"... Shouldn't ancestor-seekers want everyone to hyphenate indefinitely?"

No, just give the first born child the mother's maiden name as a middle name.


Posted by: James B. Shearer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:14 PM
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265/273: nah, everyone should just be assigned a unique id # and a hash of their parents numbers, at birth.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:17 PM
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The fact that they are apparently both changing their name renders any consideration of toolishness moot, but even if it were just him, why exactly would it make him a tool? Fair enough if the name itself is stupid, but what's so bad about changing your name per se? Seems a weird thing to be annoyed by.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:26 PM
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But would a cheap household robot be willing to share its opinions on Pokemon, the Teen Titans, and potential practical uses for taekwondo training in later life?

I'd say that this makes me want a kid but I already have the Internet.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:28 PM
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Also, does anyone else here have Settlers of Catan on the Xbox 360? I'd gladly play them.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:28 PM
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277: Is it good? I've considered downloading it.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:28 PM
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Earthquakes make me very nervous.


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:30 PM
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Earthquakes make me very nervous.

Me too. The notion of the earth suddenly dropping a building on me is enough to keep me from relocating to California, however irrationally. Perhaps oddly, hurricanes don't bother me at all, only because they give plenty of advance warning.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:35 PM
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279: Are you having a premonition? Should B put her house shopping on hold to see which neighborhoods fall into the abyss?


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:37 PM
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281: cali just had a midsized one


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:38 PM
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My premonitions always come a little too late. Nobody believes I'm psychic.


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:44 PM
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283: Really, they are postmonitions.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 1:51 PM
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Surprisingly still feasible with two people playing 4 characters, but just causing so much heartache when one of your colors has to screw the other over.

Rory was a big Settlers/Siedler player for awhile, but before she'd really gotten in touch with her truly competitive side, so she'd always be looking for ways to trade you exactly what you needed. She'd feel bad if she lost, too, and I'd feel bad about her feeling bad, so we played a version which was more or less a competition for who could outnice her opponent.

Earthquakes make me very nervous.

Me three. We had a teeny little one in the midwest a few months ago -- the first one I'd ever experienced. Disconcerting. Hope what just hit Cali didn't cause too much harm!


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:00 PM
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I had a twelve-letter, six-consecutive-consonant Germanic surname. My wife didn't want it. I didn't want hers. For convenience of potential future children, we wanted to share a name. Our surnames shared an initial, so we picked a new name with that initial from a favorite poem.

Two other couples in our social circle have since picked new surnames upon their marriage.


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:03 PM
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||

Ted Stevens just indicted!!

|>


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:07 PM
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gestzschthien?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:08 PM
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As is probably obvious, I only just turned on the news, so I heard about the earthquake. Somehow, that explanation didn't occur to me when I read jms's comment. I'm slow witted today.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:09 PM
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||

"Iowa doesn't have any all-nude strip clubs--but it does have performing arts centers where women dance naked. However, the loophole in the state's public indecent exposure law that allows nude dancing at "art centers" is under attack in the small community of Hamburg, a town of 1,200 just across the Missouri River from Nebraska. [...] It all began on July 21, 2007, when a 17-year-old niece of Sheriff Steven MacDonald climbed up on stage at Shotgun Geniez in Hamburg and stripped off her clothing."

|>


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:12 PM
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280 is a correct approach, real estate wise, as any sensible native will tell you. As it's a matter of "when", rather that "if", Bay Area real estate's primary value is how nice it will be after the big one. If you're paying for the structure, rather than the land, you're a sucker.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:15 PM
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people aren't procrastinating enough this afternoon. Just saying.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:19 PM
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290: "Murphy noted that the club has a gallery selling collectible posters and other art, and it provides patrons with sketch pads."

292: I'm grading. Plan to see me post a lot.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:20 PM
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so we picked a new name with that initial from a favorite poem.

wheelbarrow?


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:21 PM
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285.1: Kids are such suckers.

292: I'm trying! Well, sort of. Also looking for inspiration on what to write that avoids digging into annoying legal structure differences between investment types.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:24 PM
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294: Xanadu.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:25 PM
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Oh, and:
Earthquakes make me very nervous.
Pussies, the lot of you. Earthquakes are like unexpected surfing. I got knocked off my ass the first time, but after that it's kind of fun. As a 9 year old, I experienced Loma Prieta as something like a skateboard that killed people. It was rad.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:25 PM
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I'm successfully not writing up a report in order to avoid not editing a paper.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:26 PM
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290: I know this story! What the sheriff there? And was it dark so he didn't recognize her?


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:26 PM
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299: What=Was. Blerg.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:27 PM
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I'm grading.
i'm drinking chamomile tea


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:29 PM
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thinking of naming conventions --- we could always go back to taking the name of our craft of profession as a surname.

I suppose Bill C. Accountant doesn't have the same ring as Hiram Webmonkey, but ....


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:33 PM
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302: Not to mention half the graduates from top schools getting the names Analyst or Consultant.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:35 PM
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I liked the conceit behind a book I didn't read, Jennifer Government, where everyone takes their employer's name as their surname

Within ten years, everyone's legal name will be their dumb online pseudonym and family names will recede into history.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:36 PM
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Not to mention ... getting the names Analyst

Couldn't happen to a more deserving bunch,..


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:37 PM
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302: Yeah, I can just imagine the friendly and helpful customer service my peers and I would get if we adopted your suggestion!

(Although, I suppose next you'll be suggesting that "Di Attorney" has a strangely appealing ring to it... )


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:37 PM
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As compared to the friendly and helpful customer service you currently enjoy?

Where?


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:39 PM
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305: Or even better, everyone's surname is the first four letters of their occupation.


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:41 PM
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302, 303: Permalancer has a great ring.


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:43 PM
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Didn't we have this discussion earlier. Someone mentioned that we call doctors "doctor", but we don't run around saying "Mailman Jones! How are you doing!". Then Ogged (peace be upon him) said it would be awesome if we did, and then I realized that "Sifu" is the Chinese title I often see translated as "teacher."


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:44 PM
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307: Starbucks. Seriously. Not all of them, of course. But there's one with a drive-thru right by my train station that I occasionally stop at in the morning and they are un-fucking-believably cheerful and friendly.

Oh, Ace Hardware, too. Very nice.

Also, the company that insured my daughter's cellphone. Very pain free replacement when we learned our very important lesson about keeping cellphones dry.

That's probably it. I'm actually please to have come up with 3.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:45 PM
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we could always go back to taking the name of our craft of profession as a surname

It would certainly make the NYT weddings section a more interesting read: "Caroline D. Golddigger, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Carl Slumlord of Flatbush, was united in Holy Matrimony with Brent J. Fundmanager, son of Mr. and Mrs. F. Wentworth Whiteshoebanker of Greenwich, CT. The bride's mother is the former Jeanne Drycleaner-Smalltimefraudster. The wedding ceremony was held at St. John's Catholic Church, with Father Timothy Communicantdiddler officiating."


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:45 PM
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I think we're more likely to see people using their market segment for a surname. Kathy and John Bohemian Mix announce the birth of their child, June. The family will now be known as the White Picket Fences.


Posted by: ed bowlinger | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:48 PM
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304: You do know that was supposed to be a dystopia, right?


Posted by: foolishmortal slacker | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:48 PM
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Further to 311. Trader Joe's. Had a very nice wine shopping experience there the other day.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:49 PM
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310: In a way it's strange that there isn't more of this. I've never lived or visited anywhere that was less culturally oriented to identifying people with their jobs than the US. I suppose just out and out labeling people that way trips over other taboos.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:49 PM
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Diddling communicants is a profession?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:49 PM
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Couldn't happen to a more deserving bunch

Awww, you don't mean that. Well, yes, you do. And I suppose it's true. Some of us can't help it if we're only good at selling out!

Also, I thought back to Unfogged's brief digression on Dubai from a few days ago when I saw this, which is quite awesome.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:50 PM
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Couldn't happen to a more deserving bunch

Not for nothing are the titles of the entry level positions abbreviated "Anal." and "Ass.".


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:50 PM
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314: whatever


Posted by: rob lastchancecommunitycollege | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:51 PM
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I liked the conceit behind a book I didn't read, Jennifer Government, where everyone takes their employer's name as their surname

It's absolutely a fun read and recommended. A very enjoyably cinematic book.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:51 PM
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"Someone mentioned that we call doctors "doctor", but we don't run around saying "Mailman Jones! How are you doing!"."

Clearly you've never been to Wales.

278: If you like the boardgame, it's great. They also have Carcassone and Ticket to Ride. My offer to play applies to those games too.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:52 PM
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311: The first two wouldn't have your last name (at least, not until payment which is probably to late to change much) anway.

I'm astonished you've had decent customer service on anything phone related.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:52 PM
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It would turn many graduation ceremonies into a naming ceremony. That probably means more cake.

But when does it stop? John Corporate-Attorney, formerly John D. Student, formerly John Junior Analyst, formerly John Wanderjahr....

John Disgruntled-Retiree?


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:52 PM
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Diddling communicants is a profession?

The pay isn't the greatest, but people who pursue it generally are motivated by a strong sense of calling.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 2:58 PM
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I have somehow given birth to a child who, at 6, has decided to start making a pot of coffee for us if he wakes up first. Occasionally he'll bring cups into the bedroom to wake us up.

NO FAIR!!!

That said, I bet if I got an automatic coffee maker . . . oh wait, I'm always the one who has to get PK out of bed. With hot chocolate. Crap.

And yes, the earthquake was very exciting. I was on the second floor of Target. Can you imagine a more humiliating place to die, really?


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:00 PM
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The "humor" piece linked to in 318 is patently offensive. To associate an artist like Bo Diddly with a crass teenager driving a monster truck, or with the city of Dubai, is just appalling.

"Have you seen his house?" Bah. Bo was a hard working entertainer who deserved far more cash than he actually god. And to *contrast* him with dylan?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:02 PM
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There are Targets with more than one floor? How urbane and cosmopolitan.


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:02 PM
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324: Like retired armed forces, you'd keep the last in whatever ogical progression. You might have some Jason CorporateWhore nee PureScientist types, but if they made a point of it, they'd be tools


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:03 PM
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Also, under Rah's new naming scheme, I could *still* keep my name. Teh awesome!


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:04 PM
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Now part of me wonders what an ogical progression would be.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:04 PM
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328: You should see the fun everyone has with the shopping cart escalator.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:04 PM
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327: Please tell me you're intentionally confusing P. Diddy and Bo Diddly. Please please please.

319: And some of us just keep being called analysts until we become managers or heads of soemthing or another. Information economy kinda sucks when it comes to job titles.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:05 PM
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How urbane and cosmopolitan. like the latte-sipping coastal elite. Plain old SuperTargets weren't good enough for them


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:07 PM
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Information economy kinda sucks when it comes to job titles.

They don't have to give you title promotions when they can give actual salary promotions.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:07 PM
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My "nice wine shopping experience"s always end in drunken orgies. Some of us eat TJ's artisan bread, which helps with the drunkenness. But we always have fine coffee when we wake up: either French Roast or Bay Blend. I personally prefer the Double Dark, but do they listen to me? No they do not.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:08 PM
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333: Please tell me you you misread 327. Please please please.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:08 PM
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333: Oh, urp, um. Not intentionally.

I don't read, actually. I just look at the first couple letters of the word and guess from context. (I found this out when I was in a Husserl reading group where we literally read aloud from Husserl.)

In any case, Bo Diddly takes up a larger portion of my brain than P.Diddy.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:09 PM
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334: I think the first two-story Target I, personally, ever saw, was in Minneapolis. Which is nowhere near the coasts. Though of course it might as well be.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:09 PM
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337: Crap. Never mind. I'll follow the link next time.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:09 PM
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Target. Can you imagine a more humiliating place to die, really?

I sure can.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:10 PM
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My "nice wine shopping experience"s always end in drunken orgies.

Right. Excellent customer service, IYKWIM.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:11 PM
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Though of course it might as well be.

Yup. Glad you caught it yourself, B.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:11 PM
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Right. Excellent customer service, IYKWIM.

Also hardly the sort of place to exhibit anti-lawyer bias, mind.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:13 PM
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Target. Can you imagine a more humiliating place to die, really?

If you don't want to die, don't stand in the Target.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:16 PM
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In any case, Bo Diddly takes up a larger portion of my brain than P.Diddy.

Which is the way it should be.


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:16 PM
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You know where I get most conflicted about admitting I'm a lawyer? Doctor's offices. They ask what you do for a living, you tell them, they look at you all squinty-eyed until you find yourself desperately reassuring them that you defend doctors against frivolous, frivolous claims, and hey, how about that tort reform!


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:16 PM
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315: Trader Joe has adopted the very naming convention proposed here !


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:20 PM
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347: You could always point out that they owe 50% or more of their current salary range to you lot (and keep quiet on where much of it goes...)

I've had some weird reactions from doctors about what I do.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:20 PM
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347: Heh. My delivery with Sally was somewhat complicated and stressful (unexpected breech delivery) and while my midwife was there, some OB I'd never met before delivered her (and did a great job). After all the shouting was over, he commented that she was bigger than he'd thought she'd be, and he wouldn't have let me deliver normally if he'd known what size she was. Then, just making conversation, he asked what I did for a living. I told him I was a lawyer, and he staggered and dropped a basin.

I love scaring people. (Not that he had anything to be afraid of, of course. )


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:21 PM
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The link in 341 didn't work.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:21 PM
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Forgive me if I should already know, but what do you do, soup?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:22 PM
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For every lawyer who attacks doctors for no good reason, isn't there a lawyer who defends doctors for no good reason? Why would they assume the worst?


Posted by: Fatman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:22 PM
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Can you imagine a more humiliating place to die, really?

Hooters.
Bush Justice Department.
Self-help section of the library.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:23 PM
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You know where I get most conflicted about admitting I'm a lawyer? Doctor's offices.

Illinois doctors need to get themselves a blacklist like they have in Texas, so they can know you're not one of the litigious ones.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:23 PM
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Target. Can you imagine a more humiliating place to die, really?

So, so white.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:28 PM
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353: Earnestly? I think the legal process is pretty sucky when you have a personal stake in things, especially if you are being confronted with claims that your incompetence fucked someone up. When the plaintiff's lawyer is dragging your ass through a grinding deposition, etc., it seems pretty easy to think that the lawyer on the other side is evil and your lawyer is just some hack going through the motions who should have been able to magically make the whole thing disappear if s/he were really trying.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:30 PM
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"Programmer Lovecraft" or "Hamilton Programmer?" I'm not sure that's an improvement over what I've got now.


Posted by: Hamilton-Lovecraft | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:31 PM
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Can you imagine a more humiliating place to die, really?

Hooters.
Bush Justice Department.
Self-help section of the library.

Computer lab, with the browser open to Fark
Yankee Candle
David Hasselhoff concert


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:32 PM
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356: No, there were brown people there too.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:33 PM
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From 355:

The American Medical Association said that it had just learned of the group and that it saw no ethical issues at stake.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:34 PM
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(And yes, obviously there would be much worse places to die than Target. It was a JOKE. We used to have those here, remember?)


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:35 PM
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Excellent customer service, IYKWIM

I recommend a Pinot Noir Feu D'Amour, followed by a sparkling Wunsch-Mann and perhaps finishing with a splash of Perlé d'Amour.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:45 PM
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The thread seems to have moved on, but I just wanted to let you all know that I'm definitely not changing my name.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:47 PM
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364: Congratulations, Mrs. Tweety!


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:52 PM
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Thanks! And yeah, we've actually just decided to trade names.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:53 PM
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Aack! Big announcement preempted by a sex ATM!


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:56 PM
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When you're done withdrawing your sex, come back for more congratulations.


Posted by: peter | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:57 PM
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The two conversations will no doubt merge before too long.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:58 PM
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Woohoo! Congratulations!

On the name thing, I think just rotating each first and last name one position forward works best. So your first name would move to be your new last; your last becomes his first; his first becomes his last; and his last becomes your first.

Repeat every 5000 miles, or when you get bored.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 3:59 PM
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rotating each first and last name one position forward

And then if we ever have an argument about what year we did some certain thing, we can just check what our names were then! I guess that would work better the more names you have.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:01 PM
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Forgive me if I should already know, but what do you do, soup?

It's not really the job title per se (random academic), but the particulars of some research I do (the medical bits). In a turnaround of stereotypes, I've sometimes been bugged by physicians at parties... I've also found physicians to be fairly typical of `soft' science people in that a smallish subset have weird reactions to `hard' science & math people, of the "I was never any good at X" sort. It's more dissonant coming from physicians to me though, because they've all had this sort of training to present a uniform competence face, I guess.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:02 PM
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Congratulations! We're all invited to the wedding, right? I promise to keep McManus away from the bar at the reception.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:02 PM
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Yay for Blume and Sifu!


Posted by: Po-Mo Polymath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:02 PM
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Congratulations!!!1!


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:03 PM
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Invited? You're hosting the wedding, Knecht!


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:03 PM
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HOLY SHIT!!!!!!

Congratulations, Sifu Blume and Blume Tweety.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:04 PM
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I wouldn't expect that from a doctor either, 372. I decided not to try to become a doctor because it seemed like the two most mandatory qualifications were the ability to memorize huge amounts of arbitrary scientific information and the ability to adapt to horrible sleep schedules.


Posted by: Fatman | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:04 PM
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congratulations! Yay! JE will be so dissapointed in you two.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:04 PM
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Whoa, CONGRATULATIONS! So so great!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:05 PM
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Invited? You're hosting the wedding, Knecht!

You hear that, Fleur? And you said building the party tent was a waste of time! Whadda you think of that now, huh, huh?


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:05 PM
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378: I've worked with enough of them now that it looks different to me, but it's definitely it's own culture.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:07 PM
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You hear that, Fleur? And you said building the party tent was a waste of time! Whadda you think of that now, huh, huh?

And people wondered where the next unfoggedCon would be....


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:07 PM
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Ooh, double unfogged wedding: Blume-Sifu and Heebie-Jammies!


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:07 PM
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Woot!


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:08 PM
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Aw, yeah.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:08 PM
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Yay Blume and Sifu!! Not to be superstitious or anything, but this is the thread you chose for the announcement?


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:09 PM
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this is the thread you chose for the announcement?

Because Sifu is "not at all annoying".


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:12 PM
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double unfogged wedding: With ogged as the officiant and apo and Labs as flower girls.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:13 PM
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Not even a little!


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:14 PM
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Blume and Tweety: congratulations to you. May happiness abound!


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:14 PM
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So so great! Congratulations, Blume and Sifu!


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:16 PM
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Woot! Hook 'em Blume & Sifu!


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:16 PM
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Did you guys meet through unfogged, or did you know each other prior to your both commenting here (I cna't keep track of all this stuff)?


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:17 PM
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Hey, did you guys actually meet through Unfogged? If so, sorry about that, Emerson.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:18 PM
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I am so very happy for you both!!!! You are so wonderful togehter.
The Boston meet up at our house on September 6th will now be officially an engagement party! Hooray!


Posted by: Fleur | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:18 PM
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With ogged as the officiant and apo and Labs as flower girls.

Ben in the shorty-tuxedo as the rings-bearer.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:19 PM
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Better'n eHarmony, Chopper.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:19 PM
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just for the record, i predicted them
i can predict many more couples if you wish :)


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:20 PM
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Yeah sorry Emerson. I think your dulcet murmurings guided us together.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:21 PM
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I think the official line is that we met at an unfogged meetup... but yeah, same difference.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:21 PM
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And we will be sure to serve many, many Kirs Royeauxs!!


Posted by: Fleur | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:21 PM
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Ben in the shorty-tuxedo as the rings-bearer.

That leaves LB as the soloist.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:22 PM
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Sorry about over-posting on the happy news.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:22 PM
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In any case, Bo Diddly takes up a larger portion of my brain than P.Diddy.

Not large enough for you to spell his name correctly, though.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:22 PM
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Mazel Tov!


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:23 PM
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Nice ring, Blume.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:24 PM
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399: No, not your magical powers, read. They were dating before you were commenting here.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:24 PM
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407: My birthstone! Although I don't think Sifu knew that ahead of time.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:26 PM
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Is the latter half of 408 true?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:26 PM
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Not that it's important, but that is a gorgeous ring.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:27 PM
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Meeting through a blog comments section--more or less nerdalicious than through Usenet? IRC? Ham radio?

Seriously, though, so great. Congrats!


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:27 PM
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409: did too!

404: you can do a big combined Emerson-baiting unfogged weddings thread also featuring you and Wrongshore once we've solved the lurker's sexual dysfunction.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:28 PM
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Maybe lurker and his wife could renew their vows, too.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:29 PM
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Is the latter half of 408 true?

Not sure when read started commenting. We started dating in October, though.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:32 PM
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410: I may be misremembering when read first appeared, but I think it was after I knew about the love connection.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:33 PM
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Holy crap. Sifu and Blume!? That's great news!! And to think that they met at unfogged...(wait: did they meet at unfogged?)


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:33 PM
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Woo!


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:34 PM
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Congratulations, S&B! The ring is lovely! I'm guessing your bday is in July, Blume? I adore the birthstone engagement ring tradition. Very first-edition Emily Post.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:38 PM
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Oh, wow. Congrats, you guys!!!! That's awesome.

(Also, forget the $100 dollars, Sifu, you two should take McManlypants as a wedded name.)


Posted by: Lunar Rockette | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:38 PM
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What a pretty ring. Congratulations, both of you!


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:46 PM
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Congratulations! And what a pretty ring. Many happy years to you both.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:48 PM
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Congratulations!


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:52 PM
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Thanks all, and now I'm getting on a plane to go join the ttaM, OFE, and asilon shift of commenters.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 4:55 PM
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Have a safe flight, Blume.


Posted by: Lunar Rockette | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 5:00 PM
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That's OK, Blume and Sifu. I'm used to rejection and betrayal.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 5:38 PM
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Yay!


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 5:42 PM
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Back on topic, I do not think that Blume should take the name Tweetyfish.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 5:50 PM
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427. So sad, that he finds out on-line.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:13 PM
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It's so dignified, though, John.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:13 PM
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Wow! That's truly great.

And they'll always have a place to turn for advice when the post-marital sexual dysfunction strikes.


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:25 PM
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Huzzah huzzah! As they say aboard the doomed Pequod. I mean, mazl tov! Which will probably not be my new last name.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:26 PM
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Wild. Congratulations, you guys.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:27 PM
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Holy crap. Congratulations.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:32 PM
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I need to go to sleep, but I wanted to say in all seriousness that we would love to host any of our Unfogged friends, real or imaginary, on Saturday,September 6th for an engagement party.

This is great, great news!


Posted by: Fleur | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:44 PM
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Let me be the first to congratulate y'all on your engagement, Sifu and Blume! I'm guessing Sifu is hoping to have the nuptials performed at Burning Man?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:50 PM
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I'm guessing Sifu is hoping to have the nuptials performed at Burning Man?

Say, that's a great idea! I can't think of any reason Blume wouldn't want to do that.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 6:52 PM
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I see 101 butt-naked couples initating hot sex the minute the I-dos are said, as the priest walks sadly off to his next wedding.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:09 PM
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I've been to Burning Man weddings that were actually quite sweet, but no, we aren't doing that.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:16 PM
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You disappoint me again, Sifu.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:25 PM
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Just have someone say "Her wedding day is the happiest day of a girl's life". Blume's smart enough to see the grim implications of that.

This is my cunningplan to get her to back out. Mwahahaha.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:26 PM
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Let me be the first to congratulate y'all on your engagement

Would you settle for the thirtieth?


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:38 PM
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Oh hey, fantastic! Congratulations, Blume and Sifu!


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 7:58 PM
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Much too belatedly, but very heartfelt nonetheless: Congratulations, Sifu and Blume! I am smiling all over. What terrific news.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:19 PM
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I'd like to suggest to the happy couple that they consider hiring Emerson as a wedding consultant. He has ideas, and what's more, he's not afraid to express them. If you end up holding your wedding reception at an IHOP somewhere off the I-95, your guests can rest assured the gesture was intended at least somewhat ironically.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:26 PM
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Thank you, MC. Your trust in me is heart-warming, though in the end you too will betray me. But that's all right!


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:28 PM
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Aww, it's the first marriage Unfogged has spawned, rather than destroyed! Ogged must be so disappointed. Why, I remember way back when Tweety emailed me to ask if I could keep a secret because the most awesome thing ever had happened and he was dying to tell *somebody*.

You guys should have Armsmasher DJ the reception. First dance, "Billie Jean".

apo and Labs as flower girls.

Labs and I in matching Laura Ashley print dresses would be the most adorable thing ever.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:37 PM
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Adorable is the new deeply, deeply, weird.

Y'all are nice, though. Thanks.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:52 PM
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Congratulations to the happy couple.


Posted by: beamish | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 8:56 PM
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Your trust in me is heart-warming, though in the end you too will betray me.

Okay, I went to Maine for two weeks, so I haven't yet sent you the screech. But you're like family to me, John. Which means I will habitually disappoint you, of course, but never will I betray you.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:05 PM
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448: as far as I can see, weird and nice is just about the best anyone can hope for in this life.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:06 PM
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Would you settle for the thirtieth?

No.

There was just a little cross-posting that happened, you see.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:11 PM
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Why, I remember way back when Tweety emailed me to ask if I could keep a secret because the most awesome thing ever had happened and he was dying to tell *somebody*.

You're not just *somebody*, apo. You're special.

And I'm assuming we can expect lots of eggnog at the reception?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:12 PM
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I'm somebody where it counts.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:25 PM
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399: Actually, at least one of your predictions was a collosal disaster, read. The Yentyl thing is fraught.


Posted by: Trust Me | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:40 PM
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I'm somebody where it counts.

Well, yeah, but who's counting?


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:47 PM
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You were so promising when you were young, MC.

But that's all right.

I really resent Apo's keeping the secret. I'm not sure that he's a proper Apo any more. Tweety has taken all of the courage out of him.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:47 PM
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You were so promising when you were young, MC.

Really I wasn't, though. It's surprising I even went to college, never mind the useless PhD.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 9:51 PM
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Well, yeah, but who's counting?

Somebody else.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:10 PM
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A belated congrats to Sifu and Blume. Wow.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 10:22 PM
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Aw, congratulations, you crazy kids.


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:00 PM
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So which one of you is pregnant?


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:02 PM
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So I actually found out about the engagement via the Flickr pool. That's what I get for not reading the archives current threads. Mazel tov!


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:09 PM
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If there's a meetup I promise on my mother's grave I will attend.


Posted by: foolishmortal | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:28 PM
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Btw, and not that anyone asked for my opinion, I object to a lengthy engagement. All the Victorian novelists are unanimous on this point: don't let the bride-to-be waste away of green sickness.


Posted by: Mary Catherine | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:42 PM
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And I'm assuming we can expect lots of eggnog at the reception?

Presumptuous.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-29-08 11:49 PM
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Congratulations, Blume&Sifu. Which part of the septic isle is Blume gracing with her presence?


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 5:32 AM
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467: the Germany part; she was being approximate.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 5:42 AM
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Blume & Sifu, just remember to keep the haxxor friends and unfogged friends out of site until the priest blesses the union, because otherwise Blume's cousins might take fright and try to spirit her back to the Midwest to marry into a respectable land-owning family.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 5:45 AM
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So which one of you is pregnant?

Marvey! But he's already married, so Sifu and I are getting sympathy-hitched.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:00 AM
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I went to sleep and all the cool shit happened while I was passed out.

CONGRATS!

You should punish Emerson by making him officiate.

max
['And then you can say "Even Emerson approved!"']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:00 AM
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You know how a beer you drink in a bar never tastes quite as good after you reach your 21st birthday? Same thing with sex after Jesus blesses the union. Sorry to break that to you.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:07 AM
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Then I could say to the bride, right before the "I do", "Her wedding day is the happiest day of a girl's life" and give her a smirky look.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:09 AM
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My mom would nod approvingly, JE, and completely miss the smirkiness.


Posted by: Blume | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:12 AM
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I can never catch a break.

If you have the wedding in New York Mills along with Wrongshore, I could be there.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:14 AM
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387 was of course stupid because I was confused about what thread I was in... This thread actually makes perfect sense. Duh.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:16 AM
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The pastor who officiated the ceremony between my sister and her husband (total idiot loser jerk who helped drive me out of the denomination I was baptised in) unwittingly said "consummate" where he should have said "consecrate" during the ceremony. This being Deep Redstatia, the gaffe probably went over the heads of most of the audience, but siblings and I still get a kick out of teasing my sister about it ("So, did you edit that out of the wedding video yet?").


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:29 AM
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Woo! Congrats!

Blume's logical new name is "Sifu's Sweetie".


Posted by: Becks | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:49 AM
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399: Actually, at least one of your predictions was a collosal disaster, read. The Yentyl thing is fraught.

The Yentl thing is indeed fraught, what with all the sexual tension between Barbra and Mandy Patinkin, but the word you're looking for is yenta.

At least we now have a clue to the poster's identity: either a gentile or a seriously alienated Jew.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:53 AM
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either a gentile or a seriously alienated Jew

So that rules out...well, pretty much no one from the commenter community.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 6:58 AM
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Actually, it also rules out anyone with a language fetish, so that does in fact narrow the choices. I guess it didn't work out between w-lfs-n & redfoxtailshrub.


Posted by: Sir Kraab | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 7:03 AM
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i predicted a colossal disaster
i thought Flippanter were female, true
can't recall other errors though or else, ogged and bpl got split? how sorry, but i did not sense a very much strong romantic relationship there, just a young healthy fun dating atmos, so hopefully ogged is not suffering a heartbreak now plus to his 'exile' ;(?!
have no idea what the yentyl phrase means, so maybe not ogged
and i predicted AWB&WB, like, they might be a very nicely compatible couple, based on the unfogged flickr photo, can't find the photo now


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 8:48 AM
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While we're talking marriage:

According to science fiction author Orson Scott Card (pictured above), recent court decisions in Massachusetts and California recognizing same-sex marriage mean "the end of democracy in America." As such, he advocates taking down our government "by whatever means is made possible or necessary." [...]

But despite the fact that Card is saying all these things, he sees himself as the victim. "Please remember that for the mildest of comments critical of the political agenda of homosexual activists, I have been called a 'homophobe' for years," he writes.

See, openly advocating the violent overthrow of the United States government because two of fifty states legalized gay marriage is the "mildest of comments".


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 8:53 AM
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Orson Scott Card jumped the shark decades ago.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 8:59 AM
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Very late to this party, but I also wanted to extend my congratulations.

Do congratulations really have an extension?


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 9:01 AM
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484: Yeah, I'm familiar with his long history of homophobic commentary, but overthrowing the government and "the end of democracy" seems overblown even for him.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 9:04 AM
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See, openly advocating the violent overthrow of the United States government because two of fifty states legalized gay marriage is the "mildest of comments".

Whereas torture, surveillance, violent political intimidation, subversion of the Constitution and a spastic world war are just good clean heterosexual fun. Like lots of lube or light bondage or something.

Orson Scott Card jumped the shark decades ago.

Orson Scott Card apparently gets excellent AM radio reception via his teeth and since he has to listen to talk radio all the time, 24-7, all he can do is repeat whatever he's heard.

but overthrowing the government and "the end of democracy" seems overblown even for him.

Well, how else are you going to implement a non-democratic government that will help decent people everywhere get rid of their criminal neighbors, remove inferior races from the fatherland, ensure that homsexuals and perverts are executed, and defeat the overseas Jewish-Bolshevik conspiracy before it destroys the nation?

Er. Arab. Bolshevik. Nazi. Liberal. Um. UFO. Conspiracy. Yeah! That's it!

max
['Cut the guy some slack!']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 9:27 AM
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Belated congratulations! This is such happy news.


Posted by: Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 10:21 AM
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Fun fact: Orson Scott Card voted for Obama.


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 10:33 AM
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Just saw this thread. Congratulations to both ot you.


Posted by: I don't pay | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 10:35 AM
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Thanks dude.


Posted by: Orson Scott Obama | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 11:47 PM
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I guess it didn't work out between w-lfs-n & redfoxtailshrub.

Rub it in, why doncha.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 07-30-08 11:51 PM
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See, openly advocating the violent overthrow of the United States government because two of fifty states legalized gay marriage

hey, listen, don't question motives. This revolution thing is never gonna happen without a big tent approach.


Posted by: PGD | Link to this comment | 07-31-08 6:17 PM
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