Re: Lumbering profile

1

Do not question the Facebook, Ben. Perhaps he has some great truth to reveal.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 2:41 PM
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[Like]


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 2:41 PM
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FB is very keen that I befriend a crazy lady who semi-stalked me and a guy who once entered my room unbidden while I was asleep and tried to force himself on me. Pass! (I am not afraid or otherwise concerned about these people, I am just amused that I share 30+ friends with them.)


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 2:47 PM
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3: FB believes in forgiveness and loving your enemies.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 2:49 PM
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4: But only consensually.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 3:07 PM
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I got Casey Serin as a suggestion. Unfortunately, we have too much in common.


Posted by: bjk | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 3:21 PM
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fb keeps suggesting I get in touch with a friend who died last year. As far as I can tell, they're not trying to promote some fb ouija-board app.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 3:26 PM
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7: I've often wondered how many passed-away people's social networking profiles and email addresses remain "live" ad infinitum.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 3:32 PM
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Some of them stay up as memorial pages. P/ul Qu/rrington's facebook page is still up, for instance, and his friends and family post on its wall. Sort of a virtual shrine. It's still weird to get messages from Facebook saying "catch up with P/ul!" though.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 3:42 PM
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I'm surprised Ben didn't link to this XKCD.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 3:47 PM
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11

Takedowns of XKCD are funnier than XKCD these days.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 3:56 PM
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It's still weird to get messages from Facebook saying "catch up with P/ul!" though.

One day, you will.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 5:59 PM
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13

A college friend on Facebook passed away more than a year ago, yet his feed continues to churn out Farmville updates. I have considered writing to him and asking him to stop. Does Farmville play itself if you ignore it? Or is there someone using Brian's account to keep his farm alive?


Posted by: k-sky | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 6:35 PM
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Like a memorial garden. A memorial spamgarden.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:06 PM
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Spamgarden was overrated.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:18 PM
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16

You know you can hide specific applications, right?


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:31 PM
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16: Yes, but every time I hide one, somebody makes a new one.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:32 PM
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16: Man, I just found out I could hide all that Farmville crap. THANK GOD.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:32 PM
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16: Dude, you can also hide the horoscopes, and the ... whatever that other one is, the one that seems like a scavenger hunt.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:41 PM
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12: That's just the thing. It's like he's calling me from the Other Side. Dude, I don't even return my calls from This Side.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:51 PM
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19: You need stupider friends. I just hid "OMFG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS GET BUBBLES ON YOUR PAGE!!!"


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 7:55 PM
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22

Actually, if the bubbles work, that probably isn't as stupid as Farmville.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:02 PM
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20: I think there has to be a way to say to the Facebook overlords that something is an inappropriate suggestion. I would find suggestions like that ghastly and most unwelcome.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:05 PM
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11: I dunno. Takedowns of XKCD, including this one, always impress me with their humorlessness.

On the other hand, the Facebook satire linked in that link was solid.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:06 PM
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22: all of those are malicious apps.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:09 PM
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That is, all of the "OMG LOOK AT _____ AMAZING" pages.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:09 PM
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Which, the fact that a fucking web site allows for malicious 3rd party apps. Get it the fuck together, facefuck.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:10 PM
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25: Most of them come from my only FB friend who has done time, so it fits.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:11 PM
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28: So they're killer apps.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:14 PM
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29: His lawyer was successful at getting the 2nd degree murder charge dropped.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:17 PM
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31

He poked someone to death? Hard.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:18 PM
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23: It's actually one of the reasons I deactivated my Facebook account. (Though it wasn't the main catalyst. That was when Facebook tried to squeeze a second e-mail out of me for "security reasons." If someone's going to mine my data like that, they should at least buy me dinner.)


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:20 PM
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24.1: I know. And they're still funnier than XKCD.

The collegehumour satire is priceless.


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:23 PM
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32: Sweetheart, I'd buy you dinner any time. But enough about that.

They tried to get a second email address from you? That's weird. (It's occurred to me that you could have just unfriended your dead friend, except that there might have been postings regarding him there.)


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:26 PM
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34: It learned my gmail address from my university email address, which was creepy.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:28 PM
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36

You can block all 3rd party apps in one fell swoop (and whitelist in any specific ones you want). Highly recommended.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:36 PM
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37

||

So as I sit here listening to Janelle MonĂ¡e and snacking on delicious kale chips, I realize: you people have an outsize influence on my habits.

|>


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:46 PM
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34: which was creepy.

Tell me about it


Posted by: Miles Dyson | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:46 PM
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39

I know a great tailor who can make you a suit, essear.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:51 PM
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I know a great suitor who could make you a Taylor, essear. Really, you don't even need to go through him. It's relatively easy to change your legal name.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 8:55 PM
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41

I know a great suitor who could make you a tail.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:08 PM
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41: That's probably the joke I wanted, on reflection. I was post-pwned.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:12 PM
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42: It happens.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:15 PM
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44

I feel like the proper response to "you people have an outsize influence on my habits" should have involved a tailor who would fit me for a properly sized tunic, scapular and cowl.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:23 PM
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45

I know a great suitor can tail you who make essear.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:23 PM
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46

+a.,


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:27 PM
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Can you make a great suit, you tailor who I know.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:28 PM
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48

I know a tale of soot, but it is quite messy. Messear than other tales.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:35 PM
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37, 44: "you people have an outsize influence on my habits"

Sadly I've used up my daily allowable mentions of "enormous hand-stretched penis".


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:39 PM
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I think that's "artisanal hand-stretched penis."


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:41 PM
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51

Could be, but the one I'm thinking of is enormous.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:45 PM
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52

I'd rather have a suitor in front of me, than a bespoke lobotomy.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 05-20-10 9:54 PM
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34.1: I'll hold you to that!

34.2: Yeah, the really weird thing was that they suggested, as second e-mails, several accounts I hadn't used in years. Like, since before Facebook. But regardless, they demanded a second e-mail before letting me log in. Bizarre behaviour.

(I actually did consider unfriending P/ul to stop the creepy revenance, but mutual friends might've taken that the wrong way.)


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 1:09 AM
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I've decided to shut down my brief election-related fbook presence (notably after Zuckerberg's remarks regarding having more than one identity showing lack of integrity).

I do remember that when Chris Lightfoot passed away, one of the first things I noticed was that the home server that powered his homemade RSS aggregator had stopped polling my blog. It took me too long to remove the entry for his blog from my RSS reader.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 3:31 AM
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Argh, one of my Facebook friends just joined the group " ...It's funny how our flag offends you but our benefits don't!!!..." *Hide*


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 4:53 AM
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There is a facebook group devoted specifically to running down the street where my mum lives wearing a supposedly-banned England football shirt; it has over three thousand members.


Posted by: Abelard | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 7:37 AM
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57

NB all ambiguities intentional.


Posted by: Abelard | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 7:38 AM
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This whole football shirt thing is fucking ridiculous and really pissing me off. For a start, it's not even true. And if it WERE true, it's not about protecting the rights of foreigners who will be upset by the sight of an England shirt, it's about fucking football violence, because, as is shown by the reactions of you fuckwits, you're a bunch of ignorant thugs. Get a brain, morans.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 9:16 AM
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On the crazy-three-thousand group, there is one person gently suggesting that she has heard that this may not be true, but it is literally just one. Otherwise it's, to coin a phrase, epistemic closure. I don't know how you could possibly go about addressing that amount of panicked ignorance.


Posted by: Abelard | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 9:21 AM
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I don't know how you could possibly go about addressing that amount of panicked ignorance.

Have you considered starting a Facebook group devoted to addressing panicked ignorance?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 9:24 AM
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61

Coating lottery tickets with Valium might help.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 9:25 AM
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60: I don't really believe in Big Society approaches.

Actually, since this morning, there are now a bunch of people repeatedly posting along the lines THERE IS NO BAN ON ENGLAND SHIRTS READ THIS LINK but to little effect.


Posted by: Abelard | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 9:27 AM
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Yeah, I joined "Nobody is banning any England shirts, you gullible xenophobic fool" so at least everyone knows where I stand.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 9:52 AM
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64

Nobody is banning any England shirts

Once I'm elected to high office ...


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 10:18 AM
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64: Think of how they'll complain when branded with the lion rampant!


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 10:34 AM
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re: 65

Compulsory tartan hats with attached ginger wigs. With a Saudi style morality police to check you're wearing it.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 05-21-10 1:12 PM
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and fake freckles drawn on with light brown eyeliner.


Posted by: alameida | Link to this comment | 05-22-10 7:04 AM
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