CHOCOshot oral - Nut treatment
I'll have one of those, ma'am.
in case the method of ingestion was insufficiently medicalized for your tastes
Suppository or nothin'.
LB, I think Apo is stealing your pseud.
Now is a gross time to mention that weird "fad" of high school girls soaking their tampons in vodka, right?
No grosser than any other time. Wouldn't that... burn?
7 implies there would be a better time and I don't see that as likely.
8: Worse than being pwned, I'd think.
This could be like the stretched vs engorged penis length experiment of Unfogged yore. Ladies, report back in 20 minutes.
Ladies, report back in 20 minutes.
Sorry, that was obviously misstated: a lady would never soak her tampon in vodka. The rest of y'all report back in twenty minutes.
A fine single malt, on the other hand...
I'd think you'd want something with bubbles. Prosecco, maybe. Or just some Fresca on a panty liner.
Wouldn't that... burn?
Would it burn more than pouring vodka in your eye?
A frat at my undergraduate institution practiced what was known as 'anal chugging' it involved beer and three rotating participants playing the roles of 'pour', 'set', and 'drink'. Need I mention that this was the most obnoxiously stereotypical fratboyishly homophobic, racist, and sexist fraternity on campus?
16: I feel certain there's a joke to be made here concerning Bass Ale, but I think we're going to need Stanley.
A tip for smart diners - the restaurant markup on wine is much greater than that on food. Just soak your tampon in a nice Pinot before leaving the house!
8: I know! I always thought this revealed a determination and persistence I hadn't expected in today's youth. Hope is apparently not lost.
That article about vodka eyeballing has left me permanently scarred.
weird "fad" of high school girls soaking their tampons in vodka
Do they do this before or after the tampons have been worn?
And is this reserved for when they're menstruating, or is it something done for any old night on the town?
I guess a vodka-soaked tampon wouldn't actually be very effective during menstruation.
"I have a box of tampons, a gallon of vodka, one egg, a plastic cup, and a microwave..."
22, 24: Apparently it's taken seriously enough that new doctors get briefed on it, because of the danger of alcohol poisoning. Although I do remember some alarmist news reports.
And from what I remember, it was the kind of thing where you could get wasted while sitting in class, and no one would be the wiser. Except, presumably, for the expression of extreme discomfort and the wobbling. I don't think it had anything to do with menstruation.
23: I think this is better than your question about homemade twizzlers.
I love how heavily that eyeballing article works the "even respectable young people are doing it!" angle. "I mean, boorish commoners we expect to blind them selves with grain alcohol. But if middle class youth are partaking, then it must be a real problem."
26 is a quote from an unaired episode of Macgyver.
it was the kind of thing where you could get wasted while sitting in class, and no one would be the wiser
If this is the best idea that anyone could come up with to accomplish that goal, then I'm going to worry that all the scare stories about the pitiful education of our youth might be right after all.
it was the kind of thing where you could get wasted while sitting in class, and no one would be the wiser
Maybe I'm imagining it, but I seem to remember my mother mentioning this being used by female prison inmates as a way to consume alcohol without being detected, perhaps under the mistaken impression that if you don't drink the alcohol it won't be noticeable on your breath.
Well, I think it also has to do with getting really fucked up really quickly, and one-upping each other. Much like people snorting vodka, or buying those stupid vaporizers.
But all of that sort of validates your concern.
Certainly, there's a long tradition of putting booze and other intoxicants up your ass. Thin tissues, lots of blood vessels. Cheap!
I'm sure I've talked before about the brief booty bumping fad in the LA circles I ran in.
But there's another, more apposite story about why you might wish to avoid borrowing a turkey baster from the gutter punks next door.
Thin tissues, lots of blood vessels.
If you're going to shove an intoxicant up your ass, at least spare your ass the further indignity of cheap tissue. Get the 2-ply.
there's a long tradition of putting booze and other intoxicants up your ass. Thin tissues, lots of blood vessels.
As long as we're shoving things up our asses, this story is impressive but what's with the CVS receipt? Was he expecting to take some of that back for a refund once he got out? But even more mysterious, I usually couldn't carry a single cigarette in a shirt pocket without it breaking. This guy's practically Houdini.
I can almost, vaguely, in my most distant memories, recall a time when getting drunk fast was a desirable thing and didn't mean that I would black out after an hour and wake up with all my clothes on, only to discover I picked a fight about some political topic I don't know anything about. Ah, to be young again!
I'd think you'd want something with bubbles.
Glancing at the the thread linked in 37 reminded me that this seems to be one of apostropher's long-held opinions.
38: Probably didn't care if the cigarette broke because he could re-roll with a CVS receipt.
black out after an hour and wake up with all my clothes on
Probably generally better than waking up with them all off.
I don't know whether or not to be cheered that 37 and 40 go to the same thread.
It's comforting that we were discussing putting intoxicants up your ass almost exactly a year ago.
Also, I'm still quite happy with "Pump-Can Spice Latte".
OK, watching the Brits (BRITs?) - question for Stanley or anyone - bands with 2 drummers? Arcade Fire (on now) and Adam and the Ants. Any more?
42: Absolutely. It's a sign of maturity.
More importantly, I think the story referenced in 34 probably needs to be retold.
45: well, it would be less disconcerting for me. YMMV.
Ah, you know. Not much too it. A bunch of bored ravers decided for some reason that the moment was nigh for everybody to start sticking e up their asses. Nobody, as far as I know, found five dollars.
It was just the way it propagated like any other fad in LA. Cheap souvenir visors! Korean tacos! Avoiding vaccinating your kids! Competitive eating fandom! Richard Simmons exercise class! Sticking MDMA up your ass! Sure, whatever. What's the new thing?
I revise 47.1 in favor of 45, conditionally.
Now I have to go outside and menace the neighborhood children with a rake. From my lawn.
I'm not sure I even understand the thought process
omit extraneous o.
A bunch of bred ravers?
52.1 I'm glad to see how powerful my rhetorical ploy was. "Is it?" gets 'em every time.
bands with 2 drummers?
Grateful Dead and Lynyrd Skynyrd come to mind first.
34, 51: As I'm sure you know, the same thing was going on up here, too.
58: you've always been at the forefront of ass-based activities up there.
OK, watching the Brits (BRITs?) - question for Stanley or anyone - bands with 2 drummers? Arcade Fire (on now) and Adam and the Ants. Any more?
Do Make Say Think; King Crimson (on two different occasions); Sholi; Magma (briefly). Many more.
I'm getting the sense that urple is increasingly perturbed by all of this.
Hypothesis: If you are waking up in a strange place, being naked is either much better or much worse than being clothed.
The Fall had two drummers from 1980 to 1984 or so.
Tortoise.
What does the post title mean? I assume it has something to do with the Lars von Trier show, but aside from the medicine connection I don't get it.
When Ringo tours these days, he plays the drums, his son is on stage playing the drums, and then they have a third drummer whose job is to actually keep the beat.
I don't even know what the Lars von Trier show is!
Now, name a band that had two people-who-drum and two people with intoxicants up their butts.
Modest Mouse, The Allman Brothers
72: I said Grateful Dead back in comment 57, Tweety.
I believe The Lars von Trier Show was retooled after the pilot, becoming what we now know as Xavier: Renegade Angel.
62: There is astronomical evidence that it's not just urple.
It was just the way it propagated like any other fad in LA. Cheap souvenir visors! Korean tacos! Avoiding vaccinating your kids! Competitive eating fandom! Richard Simmons exercise class! Sticking MDMA up your ass! Sure, whatever. What's the new thing?
You sure make LA sound charming like hell.
Korean tacos are really good, actually.
78: why? Only one of those things is actually bad. One is kind of silly, two are kind of awesome, one is surprisingly exciting, and one is a little puzzling but whatever.
74 could be a plausible response to 72.
Tangentially, do any of you other Reagan Youth remember this?
and one is a little puzzling but whatever.
This makes me think that somebody should try starting a new fad using this basic approach.
Person A: "Have you tried sticking raw oysters in your ears yet?"
Person B: "No, is it all cracked up to be?"
Person A: "Well, not as exciting as it could be, but what is?
Korean tacos are pretty good. Can't say I've had too much experience with the rest of the list, except for the no-vaccination crowd, against whom I've ranted enough in the previous threads. Don't even know what the Richard Simmons exercise class thing could possibly mean. And I thought competitive eating fandom was a brief national fad brought on by like three ESPN.com articles.
Korean tacos are pretty good
And if you shove them up your butt, you don't get that tell-tale Korean taco breath.
83: Yes of course. As a kid, for some reason I didn't get that it was supposed to be a joke; just thought it was another dance song.
86: it's a lot like crossfit, really.
I have friends who are devoted to that class, and drive clear across town for it every week. Richard Simmons is reportedly extremely nice. There is sometimes crying at the end of class, followed by hugs.
Korean tacos are only okay (tasty enough, but less good than either proper tacos or proper Korean food). Not vaccinating your kids seems pretty bad, although maybe whooping cough is surprisingly exciting, I wouldn't know.
I am prone to violent sneezes and whooping cough sounds not exciting at all.
maybe whooping cough is surprisingly exciting
You're thinking of whooping cranes.
Also, I don't know about souvenir visors, but I'm going to start rocking one of those Asian lady Darth Vader visors any day now.
maybe whooping cough is surprisingly exciting
One of my cow-orkers had whooping cough last year; it took him months to recover. It was kind of exciting wondering if he'd managed to infect any of the parents in the office, though.
||
The Great Gatsby ... for Nintendo, circa 1990. Emulated on flash. Weird.
|>
97 is really something. If you play long enough, do you get to fight the giant eyes of TJ Eckleburg?
I'm going to sleep soon, but I'm still disappointed that nobody took up Apo's challenge in 11. Back in the old days, when giants strode the earth blog, they would have had no hesitation about... uh, sticking giant-sized vodka-infused tampons inside themselves for Science entertainment.
I'm going to sleep soon, but I'm still disappointed that nobody took up Apo's challenge in 11. Back in the old days, when giants strode the earth blog, they would have had no hesitation about... uh, sticking giant-sized vodka-infused tampons inside themselves for Science entertainment.
99, 100: I was about to say: Nuh-uh. You're romanticizing the past; back the old days, people would not have done that.
Then I remembered a thread back in late '07, I think, that had people experimentally trying to figure out whether you could have sex while riding a bicycle, then reporting back to the blog on their findings. It was in the name of science.
... I'm not finding the thread so far. Early November of 2007, I think.
98: To win you have to destroy his corneas.
(Whaaaaat with the obscure reference.)
I was joking, but you do! It's the boss of level 2!
I feel off the train and got bored.
And now I learn that while I've been spending all my time dicking around on the interwebs someone else just went and published something identical to one chunk of the interrelated set of projects I'm working on. I guess I need to learn the lesson of shoving least publishable units out the door as soon as they're finished. Or procrastinating less. Now, back to that Gatsby game.
Is the power-up a golden hat? As in "gold-hatted, high-bouncing"?
You could have made my typo in 106 into a joke about train pron.
||
Just so y'all know, reading the just arrived autopsy report on someone I loved and lived with for some time is a very strange experience, and I'm no stranger to strange. It's not bad at all, what it's unexpectedly doing is making things final in a way witnessing her death itself didn't for some reason.
(For the medically curious, there were no surprises in the report. Much coronary artery disease, some plaque let go, and more cardiac and other system disasters cascaded from there.)
|>
all right all right. i'm not menstruating, depressive, and anonymous for nothing.
findings:
you can get about 2/3 ounce of Russkiy Standart vodka into an O.B. (RIP?) regular tampon. enough for a buzz i guess, but maybe not enough to get our panties in a bunch over?
additional thought: is the vodka even very likely to diffuse OUT of the tampon in substantial quantity into vaginal tissue? aren't tampons more absorbent than human tissue? i guess i don't know.
next realization: vodka is going to squeeze out of this bloated tampon as i try to get it in me. this was true. worked carefully to minimize the effect.
consideration: maybe it will hurt less / absorb less since i do in fact have my period?
results:
bahhh fuck yes it hurts! ok enough enough!
i "pussied out" after i had it in there for about one second so maybe it woulda stopped hurting, but i doubt it. the pain went away after a quick rinse, but my vagina still feels a little drunk.
Biohazard, I am sorry to hear about that and wish I had hit preview.
112: No problem. I'm just reporting something I found interesting, I'm not looking for sympathy nor in need of solemnity.
If hitting preview would have meant you didn't post 111, then I'm very glad you didn't preview. 111 is good science.
(Not to intend any disrespect for biohazard's situation. Condolences.)
I like how the credits at the end attribute the story to M. Suzuki and F. Scott Fitzgerald. I guess the part where Nick fights crabs on West Egg Beach was inserted by M. Suzuki.
vodka is going to squeeze out of this bloated tampon as i try to get it in me.
I thought about this, but then thought maybe I was just an idiot who's never used a tampon.
113: Still, mine condolences also.
In a way, this thread is far more frightening than zombies, vampires or werewolves.
110: what it's unexpectedly doing is making things final
Makes sense, Biohazard. Peace! Good to see you as always.
Did I really just play that entire game? Weren't NES games about $50 back in the day? Good god I'd have been pissed...
Poke around the webpage more. It becomes clear that this was never a real NES game.
Biohazard, you seem to be a really well adjusted guy. You don't want sympathy, which I get, so just:
Ursyne, you are heroic.
Um, the invisible part says [empathetic nod]
Ursyne, I shoulda warned you. Back when Martha and I were young and foolish and drunk, we were fooling around, and a bottle of grappa in an unusual format (slender, elongated container) found its way into our reverie. When the inevitable mishap occurred, Martha squealed like a stuck pig.
Kids, don't try this at home.
I don't even have a reverie, but I did once get grappa into my mouth and it was horrible.
Depends whether you drink it Mobystyle or Marthastyle.
vodka is going to squeeze out of this bloated tampon as i try to get it in me
I was definitely imagining this experiment being done with an applicator tampon.
(NOT volunteering.)
I dunked my balls into a cup of vodka for a couple of minutes. No effect other than an astringent sting. And that damn Sally wouldn't help at all.
And the Sons of Moby smile and are blessèd—they know the Angels are on their side.
They know in them is the Grace confessèd, and for them are the Mercies multiplied.
They sit at the feet—they hear the Word—they see how truly the Promise runs.
They have cast their burden upon the Lord, and—the Lord He lays it on Martha's Sons!
I played the entire video game of "The Room" (here). It's long, and incredibly boring, but possibly a more coherent experience than the movie.
It is true, though, that grappa bottles are frequently very elegant. Whether that means they should be introduced into one's reverie is another question.
131 is the stupidest thing I've read in months and I read many things.
135: stupider than soaking a tampon in spirits and inserting it? really?
136: At least liquids diffuse across a mucus membrane.
Various chemicals cross the dermis to Moby Nicotinepatch.
"to" s/b "too"
Though I suppose it could stil work
Ursyne, you are a badass. Perhaps the most badass commenter of all time.
129: yeah, applicator would have made a difference, though the saturated tampon might actually just get stuck in the applicator? someone can surely test *that*...
i thought i hated grappa until i tried some lovely chamomile grappa once. IN THE FACE.
aw, thanks halford! and donaquixote and urple and whoever else wasn't turned off of internet forever. it was so worth it!
139: Go teabag a tea bag and let me know if you get caffeine.
Can't sleep, so checked back. Ursyne, you're the best!
yayyyyy. also i made cookies tonight and they are good. what a triumph!
Have you considered fashioning cookie dough into a tampon and seeing how that works? Just a thought.
Then this is absolutely a good night, assuming your vagina has recovered.
hm, i'll give it a try once you try using THIS RETORT as a tampon!!!
I'm not really sure how I would go about using anything as a tampon, sad to say, but a retort looks particularly awkward.
152: There's probably instructions on the box.
152: whoa. that is some klein-bottle-lookin shit. maybe enough science for one night, then!
Not really more so than an elegantly shaped grappa bottle.
152: Seriously, that looks like some sort of misguided Victorian medical device. Wise decision, ursyne.
Speaking of chocolate, have we discussed this 10 minute video of a woman having chocolate sauce poured on her face?
152: I would think the good old reliable multipurpose turkey baster is the tool of choice for experiments in mucosal membrane irritation.
This wasn't quite what I expected when I started googling the etymology for "stinging retort".
@127
Great grappa is good. Sadly, the rest is shite.
Boy, did I pick a day to get hyper-busy and play catch-up later. The boozy-tampon-up-the-butt/vagina thing is called "ripcording" in my group of social, uh, peers. Urban Dictionary has a different definition for it, though, and I know of it solely as a legend of another stupid thing that frat dudes do that can lead to alcohol poisoning.
Anyhow, ursyne ripcorded for science. Go ursyne!
Shit, 111 is science, y'all. That's the coolest thing I've read in a long time.
If by cool you are talking about the evaporative effects of alcohol, and I think you are.
Urban Dictionary has a different definition for it
To clarify: they have a different definition for "ripcord".
experiments in mucosal membrane irritatation
Don't forget the potential of the humble garlic clove.
(I have not always succeeded in taking this advice, and I would also like to note that Typepad seems to have completely broken the mechanism by which one could otherwise link directly to comments. What's wrong with <a name="whatever">, guys? I can't wait to get my own domain and move my blog to wordpress, except I anticipate that converting this so that intra-blogular links still work will be a royal PITA. Fuck you, typepad.)
If you had grappa so bad you couldn't even use it for caffe corretto, you could clean it up a bit by running it through a still, so it might be good to have a retort on hand. That's a pretty piece of glass.
My blog—and by extension I—used to be funny.
Don't go to grad school, kids.
Your blog's funny-lookin', nosflow.
would also like to note that Typepad seems to have completely broken the mechanism by which one could otherwise link directly to comments.
Broke it how?
I am not having trouble? For example, like so works fine, though the URL isn't exactly beautiful.
The problem is that it is using id instead of name?
For the comment to which I intended to link one has the following HTML:
<div class="comment comment-even" id="comment-5740490">
<div class="comment-content" id="comment-5740490-content">
<span id="comment-5740490-content"><p><a href="http://waste.typepad.com/waste/2005/05/the_curseacuted.html" rel="nofollow"> <em>Also, keep garlic out of your mucous membranes</em></a></p>
<p><em>Also, I expelled some chorizo from my right nostril</em></p>
<p>I see the lesson wasn't learned.</p></span>
</div>
<p class="comment-footer">
Posted by:
Standpipe Bridgeplate |
<a href="http://waste.typepad.com/waste/2005/05/the_death_of_ro.html?cid=5740490#comment-6a00d8341cb5c253ef00d8347b102d69e2">May 19, 2005 at 04:20 PM</a>
</p>
</div>
</div>
</div>
Note that while the part of the href for the ostensible permalink to the comment that follows the # is unrelated, as far as I can tell, anyway, to anything else that appears in its vicinity, and while the cid parameter to the query string has as its value something that resembles the id attached to the anchor tag (and the ids attached to the enclosing divs), it doesn't precisely line up—which means nothing in itself given that there could be lots of processing on the server of this value—but since the link doesn't actually go to this comment when loaded, one is not inclined to be impressed with all this ```````two point oh comma web''''''' b.s.
The problem is that it is using id instead of name?
Even if it used <a name="NAME">, the ostensible permalink would have to be changed so that instead of:
<a href="?cid=XXX#YYY">
where XXX is a string that very closely resembles, but is not the same as, the string NAME, it was simply
<a href="#NAME">
.
(I see that the snippet above didn't actually include the anchor tag. It's "<a id="c5740490"></a>"—so the id is cXXX, while the permalink anchor tag has ?cid=XXX#(entirely unrelated string)[1].)
[1] the entirely unrelated string appears to be internal ID of the comment and I'm sure having access to it would be very useful if I were attempting to access the comment programmatically using typepad's API, which I am not trying to do and which I never succeeded in getting to work as advertised anyway, but that is UNRELATED.
I am not having trouble? For example, like so works fine, though the URL isn't exactly beautiful.
Those work fine for me as well. However, note that in those cases, the values for the anchor with the id attribute, and the cid parameter to the query string for the anchor with the href attribute, are actually the same. (Also, the string following the # character in the anchor with the href attribute is the same as the id attribute in the earlier anchor, except with "comment-" prefixed; I admit I'm not up enough [1] on these things to know what black magix might be responsible for these links working.)
[1] because not up at all
the entirely unrelated string appears to be internal ID of the comment
It looks like something is weird with that post; I just looked at a more recent one on your front page and it's correct.
Oh, I see! That sure is broken. Is it just the comments on that one post? The couple of more recent ones I was poking at just now were fine. (This is no doubt super fascinating for everyone else.)
The same thing is weird on the nextmost and previousmost post from 2005.
And on the secondnextmost and secondpreviousmost posts from that year that actually have comments.
I conclude that the problem is general for older posts.
Can you easily change the templates to use a different permalink, replacing the ?cid=[comment id] with #c[comment id] , e.g. http://waste.typepad.com/waste/2005/05/the_death_of_ro.html#c5740490 ? The cid parameter does seem pointless. (I assume typepad gives you access to templates but I haven't actually used it.)
That said, it is curious why the links work on newer but not older posts. Curious and solvable, but one would have to debug javascript. I looked at it a little bit, but the file that appears to be handling comments (http://waste.typepad.com/.shared/js/atpcomments_yui.js?v=5 ) contains the word "tweeterbookafeederverse". That's how you know it's bedtime.
I think typepad changed the way they handle comments in their database in early/mid 2009. If you start with this comment, I bet all the comment links on that post after it work and all the comment links before it don't. I haven't checked them all because I'm not wasting that much time.
Also, some people really don't get close reading.
Don't forget the potential of the humble garlic clove.
Nosflow hates the laydeez with yeast infections.
Don't forget the potential of the humble garlic clove.
Nosflow hates the laydeez with yeast infections.
Garlic. Yeast. Add some tomato?
Science wins thanks to the ursynes of presentyear.
Also new considerations in the great "Would you stir your coffee with her used tampon?" debate.
Garlic. Yeast. Add some tomato?
Vegemite?
||
Oh my god, you guys. So I'm the sponsor of a sorority. Every February during rush week, they make their pledges find a bunch of inspirational leadership quotes, which they type up and give me. (Taped to my door, in my mailbox, decorated, etc.) Here's a typical one: "Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other" - John F. Kennedy. (They're always attributed, which is important.)
I just received this quote.
Are you fucking kidding me? How dumb is this girl? It's even a creepy Hitler quote.
|>
193: That not dumb. That is deliberately threatening.
That's really disturbing. Either she's very dumb, or very strange.
I don't know, it could be someone making a cynical point about the vacuousness of leadership as a concept, and leadership quotes as a task. Reading the quote that was my immediate assumption.
193: What if the adversary she had in mind was death, or injustice, or rust? Eh? Did you ever think of that Professor Kneejerk Hitler-is-Bad?
I assumed there was some book they all used, because the quotes tend to be very repetitive. It's very out-of-character for a girl rushing a sorority to do something passive-aggressive, or just plain aggressive, because hey, just don't rush the stupid sorority if you don't want to do stupid tasks. That's why I took her for dumb. They re-write the quotes in their own handwriting, or type them in cutesy font, so she literally typed Adolf Hitler.
196: Making a cynical point like that by sending a Hitler quote to an ethnically Jewish professor (or, really, anyone, I suppose she doesn't necessarily know hg's ethnicity) is possible, but it does make her very strange. I wouldn't read it quite as strongly as Moby seems to be, but I'd expect a recipient to be kind of freaked out by it.
I dunno, Adolf seems not too far from the mark there.
Maybe the cynical point concerns the tendency of our political discourse to be dominated by Bad Guy Flavors of the Month.
Do I do anything? I was thinking maybe a joint email to the sorority president and the girl who sent it saying something like "Hey, a Hitler quote is very offensive. Please keep an eye on this sort of thing."
Making a cynical point like that by sending a Hitler quote to an ethnically Jewish professor
Does she send it to heebie, or to the sorority which passes it on to heebie?
I'm really holding out for the viability of some kind of "freak the squares" interpretation.
||
A particularly informative HBGary follow-up.
|>
Either she's very dumb, or very strange.
My guess is just young and still in the "Ha ha ha nobody would expect a quote from Hitler! Edgy comedy!" stage. She might be completely unaware that you're from a Jewish background and submitted it with no more actual malicious intent behind it than a dead baby joke.
Or maybe she's a Nazi. They're out there too.
Not a bad idea. I might lean to 'inappropriate', just to make it sound less like you're all fragile and offended, and more like a dispassionate judgment that the pledge had missed the mark on acting like a normal person.
196: Then would she be in a sorority?
Yeah, that's fucking concerning. Are you gonna ask her about it? I imagine that would be awkward, but if there's a seriously deranged person involved in this group, probs you'd want to know sooner rather than later.
Still, though, what are you going to say? "So...are you just oppositional defiant, or do you have a map of Europe on you dorm wall?"
Related: wtf kind of rush are they running.
It's addressed to me. But I've never had her as a student, and students tend to assume everyone is Christian, so I'd be really surprised if she thought I was Jewish.
Pwned up and down, but I'm holding out with nosflow a la 202.last.
I'd lean toward the 'freak the squares' rather than 'a real Nazi' as well, but that still leaves her at dumb (if she didn't realize quite how intensely freaky she was being) or strange (if she knew but didn't care). An email should be usefully educational.
Surely not all people who join sororities are true believers? I mean, you can want the social stuff and other benefits that come with it while still thinking the things you are being asked to do are pretty stupid? In fact, that would seem like the natural thing to believe. But what do I know?
210: No, true, I don't think they are. But when you're doing something of your own volition, most people don't act like a little snot about it, even if they're rolling their eyes at the particulars.
I would do the joint email thing. I don't know if sororities work the same way at Heebie U, but in my experience they're quite vigilant about policing their own wrt public image. If she's just an idiot, the sorority will probably deal with it very effectively. And if it turns out she is a little psycho, presumably the next time she does something concerning the sorority president won't feel weird about bringing it to you.
What a nice time for you!
Will nobody even consider the possibility that she doesn't know who Adolf Hitler is?
Your undergraduates aren't like our undergraduates then.
A particularly informative HBGary follow-up.
I kind of wonder why the CEO and COO had passwords to the CMS at all. Don't they have underlings for that?
Will nobody even consider the possibility that she doesn't know who Adolf Hitler is?
I will!
just to make it sound less like you're all fragile and offended
Your faculty sponsor can make or break your organization's standing on campus. With this in mind, you may want to confirm your sponsor's religious background before sending Hitler quotes. Good luck with rush.
Shalom,
Dr. Heebie
Our undergraduates place a bizarre amount of value on conventionality, in my opinion.
215: it sounds like, first, the Federal subsidiary was quite small (and not making shit for money), and second that the CEO at least was both a micromanager and impossibly stupid.
inspirational leadership quotes
Is it possible the "inspirational" portion of the assignment wasn't clearly conveyed to her, and she thought it was just supposed to be a famous quote about leadership or a quote about leadership by a famous person? I could see offering that quote in that case, not as inspiration but as a sort of useful instructive warning to the reader, the same way people often cite Hitler's "big lie" quote, or a dozen other Hitler quotes.
That seems most likely to me, unless she's a creepy person.
The whole task of assigning people to write down inspirational quotes about leadership, possibly in a cutesy font, sounds like something for second-graders instead of undergraduates, doesn't it?
Inspirational quotes about leadership are most likely to make me want to vomit, but I guess that could be an outcome of many sorority-related activities.
re: 218
Ours too, I except, except being cynical and arsey just would be going with the crowd.
You should find her dorm room and put this quote on her door all adorned with puffy unicorn stickers and glitter.
The whole task of assigning people to write down inspirational quotes about leadership, possibly in a cutesy font, sounds like something for second-graders instead of undergraduates, doesn't it?
I see that you are not very familiar with sororities. It's a sort of frilly method of mind control.
I see that you are not very familiar with sororities.
The cops came and pulled him down from the ladder before his studies were finished.
"No, you don't understand! I'm an anthropologist. Yes, that's real science! Look, I have a clipboard!"
I want follow-up on Alpha Kappa Hitler.
I don't know about Heebie U, but this sounds to me like this has at least the potential for 1,000 heartwrenching articles in the student newspaper, tears, candlelight vigils, counseling, overwraught statements by college officials, blog posts, coverage by Gawker media, etc., none of which I assume Heebie wants to deal with.
My main concern would be (a) informing the head of the sorority and the girl (b) telling them that they need to STFU about this and keep it as nonpublic as possible.
none of which I assume Heebie wants to deal with
But the liveblogging potential!
Actually, that might reasonably go into the email to the sorority and the pledge: "Never, never do this again, because if you hit someone who wants to make a fuss, it could go huge, and the sorority/entire Greek system/Heebie U. could get shut down."
I still think 222 seems most likely, and that any email you send that doesn't at least suggest it as a possibility is going to come across as hyper-sensitive.
But the possibility that this person would think that only someone who is 'hyper-sensitive' would find this offensive is the the problem (one of the possible problems) we're dealing with here, right? I don't think acknowledging possible reasons she might have sent the quote is necessary.
239: not if she misunderstood the assignment.
The "big lie" line is Goebbels, urple.
Honestly, maybe I'm paranoid, but if I were HG I'd immediately delete all these comments and any other remotely public reference to this.
240: Usually when I don't understand things, I quote Nazi leaders. Sure.
Why? Possible anonymity busting, or is there some particular reason why she shouldn't talk about this?
241: At least that's what Goebbels kept saying.
244: It just seems like exactly the kind of juicy nugget that could blow up into a local or national media story, which would be unpleasant for all involved.
I think that is paranoid. Assuming the quote just went to Heebie, there's no story unless Heebie's making a fuss; the furthest it could go is that a reporter could track her down and ask her about it, and she could shut it down by not talking to them.
241: no, it's from Mein Kampf:
[T]he great masses of the people in the very bottom of their hearts tend to be corrupted rather than consciously and purposely evil, and that, therefore, in view of the primitive simplicity of their minds, they more easily fall victim to a big lie than to a little one, since they themselves lie in little things, but would be ashamed of lies that were too big. Such a falsehood will never enter their heads, and they will not be able to believe in the possibility of such monstrous effrontery and infamous misrepresentation in others...
(The combination of items 1 and 2 from the link in 248 provide both the quote that I've quoted and the source of our Goebbels confusion. I'd actually never heard the Goebbels bit; I had to google it to understand what you meant.)
Better genocidal dictator leadership quote:
"I'm quite modest. I don't want to tell people I'm a leader." - Pol Pot
253: If anyone needs further education to understand the wisdom of that quote, please introduce yourself Comrade Preap at the back of the hall.
11: This could be like the stretched vs engorged penis length experiment of Unfogged yore.
Came across something the other day that I think nicely illustrated one of the main points of discussion without the need for drawing dots on anything. Pushing down with a finger in the middle of rubber membrane covering a jar mouth, you can easily see how the material curves from your finger up to the rim of the jar (and any radial line traces out a stretched rubber band/flaccid penis).
255: What in the horrifying hell...
256: This comment from the nebster is the most complete exposition, but you may have to go back in the thread a bit for context.
256: If you draw dots, your wife asks questions unless you can get all the marks off.
I PROFOUNDLY DO NOT WANT CONTEXT. (I've decided.)
So here's how this story unfolded. I posted it on FB, where it got a zillion comments. I also received an apology of the sort "Yes ma'am so very sorry ma'am no ma'am sorry sorry yes sorry."
Then late last night I got another apology that made it clear that she'd found the facebook thread, because she defended herself against several specific accusations. In this one she finally explained herself, which is good because I was dying of curiousity. It seems she was trying to be transgressive after all, and say something about how "leadership" can capture a wide range of styles.
I've had a separate conversation w/ the sorority president, but it's clear she saw the thread too. I'm basically glad that I posted it and they saw it, for two reasons:
1) it facilitated a conversation that was a million times more forthright than we otherwise would have had
2) she got to see the reaction of 30+ random adults, and really can't shrug it off as being specific to a single professor.
But in a couple places the thread makes fun of sororities in general, and I feel a little bad that the president read that, occurring on the watch of her faculty sponsor, so I included an apology for that in my conversation with her.
The art of leadership... consists in consolidating the attention of the people against a single adversary and taking care that nothing will split up that attention.
I didn't find the quote that creepy. Carl Schmitt 101, in other words, politics 101. Egyptian Protesters vs Mubarek; today it is Bahrainian protesters vs their Royals, and/or the Prime Minister. Or you can go check out Quiggin's latest on shibboleths at CT.
You have to have an enemy. to do effective politics. You have to set up an Us vs Them. This is not optional.
Of course, the choice of which enemy might be is of utmost importance, tactically, strategically, morally.
Inspired to comment this morning (I didn't bother last night) by a paragraph in the Cambridge read 10 minutes ago.
Kita Ikki's restorationist theory of action originated in late Meiji nationalism and socialism. In Kita's first major treatise, "The Theory of National Polity and Pure Socialism" (Kokutairon oyobi junsei shakaishugi, 1906), Kita proposed an identity between ancient political society and socialism and equated the traditional absence of private property with the diminished role of state structure. To him the emperor symbolized the common ownership of property and hence a communal form of social existence. He therefore regarded the idea of the national polity (kokutai) as an appropriate "historical" model for th present to emulate in order to remove inequality and the sources of contemporary divisiveness; it also justified undertaking political action to install the communalistic ideal. Although Kita remained faith- ful to this ancient ideal of community, he modified his overall thinking significantly in the course of his career as a theorist and activist.
1906. Yeah, yeah, proto-fascism. The date is interesting, very early according to my understanding of the genesis of fascism.
It's about the nationalism. There are obviously a lot of other differences between socialism and fascism, but a loathing of nationalism, patriotism, and tribalism is absolutely critical. My enemy is capitalism and its minions, its current form as neo-liberalism, anywhere and everywhere
260: Yay that she was just young and stupid, and not young and crazy. And for once I have to concede that FB did something good in providing her with many, many examples of people who thought she was stupid and / or inappropriate.
I'm not sure I'd worry too much about the sorority president. If she's not aware of being made fun of already, she has bigger problems. She might, however, be concerned that all of this was made really public.
Can I ask what was behind your decision to post it on FB?
I don't find the quote creepy in the context of waxing intellectual about history. I find it totally bewildering, when decorated with little cutesy drawings and showing up in my mailbox.
Can I ask what was behind your decision to post it on FB?
My colleague across the hall found it hilarious and we were cracking up about it and she said "You should post this on Facebook!" So I did.
Basically, I really found the whole incident incredibly funny and wanted to make everyone else laugh too, and dwell on it for a little longer.
You're keeping the cutesy, puff paint Hitler quote, then, right? I like to imagine it bedazzled.
Oh! And also I figured it wouldn't hurt for them to have a little public embarrassment over it. I thought about that ahead of time.
1906. Yeah, yeah, proto-fascism.
No, not proto-fascism; what M&E identified in the Manifesto as 'Feudal Socialism'. The significance of the date 1906 would be that Japan had just for the first time in its history won a war against a world power (Russia), and was working out what to do about its new international status. Under those sort of conditions the world and its dog have a theory about everything, and the most peculiar ideas get their 15 minutes.
Oh! And also I figured it wouldn't hurt for them to have a little public embarrassment over it. I thought about that ahead of time.
Heh. Beware Heebie, who advises in the socratic manner.
255, etc.: As great as that discussion is, it's always bothered me, because it's clear this w-lfs-n fellow doesn't understand elastics and Hooke's law.+
267:Roger Griffin
locates the mainspring of the fascist drive for national rebirth in the modernist bid to achieve an alternative modernity, which is driven by a rejection of the decadence of 'actually existing modernity' under liberal democracy or tradition.
I'll agree that Japan never made it to full bore fascism in part because of the centrifugal forces of residual feudalism, but I would contend that the forces that inspired the imperalism were proto-fascist forces. An alternative exceptionalist modernity.
Is there some reason that almost everyone is completely discounting the possiblity that she thought it would be funny? These are students we're talking about. Ill thought out offensive humour is kind of par for the course, no? I can think of a dozen people in my year at university who would have done the same thing (assuming they had been given the task for some reason).
I don't even know what the Lars von Trier show is!
It's great. Hospital drama meets paranormal horror meets intra-Scandinavian ethnic conflict. Not to be confused with the US remake/reimagining, which was rubbish. But, curiously, something of a proto-Lost.
re: 272
Yes, that was my take, in 196/210, etc Taking the piss, anyway, whether or not they thought it would raise a laugh from the recipient.
272: That show (The Kingdom) was so awesome. I thought the third part had just never been released in the US, but according to Wikipedia they couldn't shoot it because a bunch of the actors have died.
269: 255, etc.: As great as that discussion is, it's always bothered me, because it's clear this w-lfs-n fellow doesn't understand elastics and Hooke's law.
Nor do I--as I thought about it more my example is wrongity, wrong, wrong.
Stretched rubber band (or penis) linear (to a good approximation); for the circular elastic membrane it is non-linear along a radius because the point(ish) load in the center is spread out around the larger diameter along the jar lid. So it is like a wedge-shaped rubber band which would stretch more at the thinner end (or a spring with k that increased from one end to the other*).
*Or maybe a conical penis.
Is there some reason that almost everyone is completely discounting the possiblity that she thought it would be funny? These are students we're talking about. Ill thought out offensive humour is kind of par for the course, no?
A lot of foreigners have already suggested that. not being familiar with the concept of a "sorority".
conical penis
Stormcrow's Law: No Internet search containing "penis" goes unrewarded, no matter how unlikely (This is probably already apo's law).
Via some 19th century book on the history of circumcision:
Not to shock the reader with detailed accounts as to what an important factor the shape of the penis may be in the domestic economy, I will refer the reader to Brantome's works.Which then leads to Lives of Fair & Gallant Ladies [Note: Word doc and just an excerpt of the book] (1665 but 50 years after his death) by Seigneur de Brantôme.
Moreover they deem they do not so much offend God, and are not such great harlots, as if they had to do with the men, maintaining there is a great difference betwixt throwing water in a vessel and merely watering about it and round the rim. However I refer me to them; I am neither their judge nor their husband. These last may find it ill, but generally I have never seen any but were right glad their wives should be companionable with their lady friends.
278: Now we know where Katy Perry gets her song ideas.
