My son's first joke was saying "Pee on the floor?" while naked and walking toward our bedroom.
Has she tried to throw the cat into the water yet?
No. As I watch other two year olds, it occurs to me that in some ways ours is rather docile.
The other cat probably killed it. It's always the quiet ones.
Must've lured him into a big pit that we just happen to have in our backyard.
Let me be the first to say what is it with kids and repeating jokes?
This trophy looks mildly suggestive.
7: On the veldt, cats that would use pit traps had a survival advantage.
10: I sent that link to my brother, who replied: "It seems a little wrong to give a 3rd place trophy that depicts the 1st and 2nd place contestants."
10: You can't say we weren't warned about what would happen after the repeal of DADT.
I think Mara's first verbal joke (with us, at least, though she spoke so little that maybe ever) was on being told that in our family we didn't eat dinner in the living room, she chirped, "Not anymore!" and bounced on in there with her food. That may not count, but it was the first time I'd heard her use that phrase and the start of her first leap in speaking complexity.
She also used to start every meal by tasting or looking at her food and saying, "Ow! A hot!" and then saying, "That's not a hot, that's a cheese!" or whatever the food in question was. That's probably better as a kid joke since it went on every single meal for months and months. I actually miss it.
Almost all of my two-year-old's joke's are of the form: [Question?]/Why?/Punchline! He somehow got the concept a little distorted, but the fact that it makes everyone else laugh every time makes him think he understands the concept perfectly.
"Why did the dinosaur run to the zoo?"
"I don't know, why?"
"PUNCHLINE!"
***
"Why did the bear climb a wall?"
"I don't know, why?"
"PUNCHLINE!"
***
"Why did the monkey eat a car?"
"I don't know, why?"
"PUNCHLINE!"
I think 10 is the trophy they give out at the AVN awards.
One of Joey's first jokes involved the little blocks he was playing with. I don't remember the joke, but I'll never forget the look of satisfaction he had when he announced "I funny."
That is one impressively streaming little dog.
Heebie, where is that cat-door-attack video of yours? I've tried to find it on your other blog without success.
19: I've only watched the first ten, or so, and they are fantastic.
There's some joke to be made here about Stanley, and the dangers of having one's sense of humor get stuck on puns forever, but darned if I can think of it. So just imagine I'd made a good one.
Not to boast or anything, but my 3 1/2 year old is already well skilled in the use of irony and comedic timing. This morning, when I tried to do a "hitting is bad" talk, she responded "Oh, yes daddy. Hitting is VERY bad. [Perfect beat, slight eye roll]. That's why I like biting. [peels of evil laughter]"
Trouble with a capital Trub, that one. I don't know any children like that myself.
My 4-year-old neighbor has been stuck on the "nonsequitur/nonsense" stage of humor for... well, forever, I think. All her jokes are like this:
why did the snail eat the caterpillar?
I don't know, why?
because actually he ate a chair!
I feel like this provides an interesting clue as to what amount of adult conversation actually makes sense to her. Not that much!
That's not a stage. That's a philosophy of life.
HEY! My ear just fully popped!
(This to the title of the OP.)
Thank you, thank you.
I think there's something actually wrong with that ear. When I do the "plug your nose and force air" move, there is a squeal inside my ear which is audible to other people.
We got Trouble
right here in LA City
And that starts with Trub
And the rhymes with Dub
And that stands for Wile
Speaking of milestones, today is my birthday!
Coincidentally, I am n+1 years old!
When I do the "plug your nose and force air" move, there is a squeal inside my ear which is audible to other people.
You're hurting the babel fish.
Many happy returns to peep.
36: Thanks, Thorn! Congratulations on the new house! I'm sure you're still worried, but it looks like it's going to work out now, right?
Nary a peep was given to the world that day. Unless that day was today.
38: I am always worried, but it does look like it's going to work out. Refi closing is Tuesday and I hope that means that the final closing can be Saturday, not the following Tuesday. Stupid "patriotic" long holiday weekend!
It's the greatest house and I'm so excited about it. We've decided on bluish tiles for the lower bathroom floor, I think, meaning that eventually when we extend that project into the bigger kitchen remodel in a year or two I'll get a blue kitchen floor, which sounds like a lot of fun. The kitchen is 15 by 17 feet, so it's going to be a big job, but we'll hold off a good long while on that one.
41: Can I send you the bill? On second thought, no thanks. I prefer Coca-Cola.
I do appreciate the sentiment though, heebie!
42: Sounds great! We have a kitchen with blue walls and a white tile floor. It's pretty, but I do not recommend white tile for a kitchen -- it looks dirty all the time.
44: We have white tile now, and yes.
I'll go ahead and throw a link to the new house [link redacted] up now and then maybe someone can redact it for me later in the weekend. This house-buying thing is making me feel foolhardy and free!
45: Nice! And huge! How many kids are you planning on adopting???
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In less happy news, NMM to Peter Falk.
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Holy crap Thorn, that house is beautiful. And so cheap! And huge. Why don't I live where you do?
48: You don't live here because no one who's happy in LA would be happy here, I assume, though people do eat a lot of meat.
46: We may start actively looking for another child once we get settled, but we're also specifically an ongoing resource for Rowan, maybe even Colton, and any of Mara's siblings who might ever need it, which probably would mean a baby since things seem stable for her siblings now. We just like that this gives us lost of flexibility, plus we can shut off the third floor if it gets expensive to heat. I mean, assuming there are no kids living there. The middle room there (I think bedroom five in the photos, white walls and either reddish carpet or just painted floor) is going to be our designated teen room that we'll keep ready just in case. I realize this is sort of a weird way to live!
More important, of course, happy birthday to peep and congratulations to Thorn!
What Halford said. Thorn, when you move, I'm going to be adding you to my list of Unfogged commenters that I hate because I am so envious of their houses. If anyone else wants to post photos and/or valuations and get added to the list, feel free.
(I'm still waiting for a naked gswift, btw.)
I just got 7. My memory isn't doing well.
OK, this is somewhat stalkery, but based on Google Maps Thorn's neighborhood appears to be incredibly beautiful and in walking distance of a major league ballpark, a giant beergarden, and a Hooters. I am seriously contemplating moving now.
Cincinnati isn't at the southern tip of Ohio. I've never been there and thus can't judge the rest of that article, but that mistake makes me suspicious.
56: ? Cincinnati is on the border with Kentucky.
Also, Halford, your own house is exceedingly lovely, so you can't feel too bereft.
54: A lot of nice old houses - current population of that town is about 60% of 1900 population. Despite being further west than Pittsburgh, the Cincinnati area had its greatest development earlier (Cincinnati was 6th largest city in the US in 1850--and nearly the size of New Orleans, Philly and Boston).
Wow, Thorn, that is a gorgeous house! I am in awe. I thought we were getting a great deal in Salt Lake City but my place is twice as much and half as big.
I love your stained-glass windows. I had some custom made for our house because I love it so much. What a treat to have it already be part of the house.
56: Oh, I see, you mean the little pointy bit.
Southern Ohio starts about ten miles south of downtown Columbus.
38 -- Thanks but I could really also use some extra cash to be applied to baseball games, sausages, and Hooters.
OK, tbh I don't really like Hooters, but this blog makes me want to pretend to love it.
If Hooters would go to a paleo menu they'd have the fucking veldt absolutely covered.
I mean, if I want to see an endless variety of beautiful, buxom women I just need to look over to the other side of the bed. Who needs some crappy breaded chicken tenders thrown into the mix?
67: You're right, the grease stains the photos in the montage.
My kid's first joke was when he was about a year old and still in the single-word-at-a-time phase. I was feeding him green beans and had just taught him the word for what he was eating.
"Bean!" he happily announced, picking one up and eating it. "Bean!" he said again, and ate that one too. "Bean!" he said a third time, and chowed down once more. Then he put the fourth one on top of his head and said "Hat!"
To this day, I consider it one of the purest expressions of comedy I have ever witnessed.
Evan, it's downright profound, is what it is. Freaking Wittgenstein couldn't do better.
54 is totally accurate. Walking across the pedestrian bridge to baseball games is a lot of fun, though there's also a cute little shuttle that Mara loves that would take you there for just a dollar. I've never been to the Hooters, but I'm sure for a floating Hooters it's pretty much what you'd expect. The beer garden is the biggest outside Munich or some shit like that. I'm not much of a beer person or crazy for German food, but it's popular and not at all bad.
I complain about this place, but that's more because of things like being represented by Rand Paul than day-to-day living. I just got back from an evening with Mara and my parents at the giant Greek festival at the Orthodox church north of the city to find Lee sitting on our neighbor's front porch drinking beer and listening to the ballgame with him.
I'm sure it's not ideal for certain kinds of singles, but that article is bogus and I could have told him he'd run into the demographics he did even at places (like Jeff Ruby's restaurant and The Pavilion spring to mind) that I've never been to myself. There's plenty of good food, good arts stuff, not the kind of diversity of options you'd get somewhere like NYC or LA, but very good for what it is.
74.last: Like supper clubs as smoking as anythng you'll find in Beverly Hills.
LizS, I love your cattail stained glass! And Lee would be jealous of your fireplaces. She's sad that the ones in the new place were plastered over, probably in the '60s when it was a multifamily.
We're uncharacteristically lucky in that a lot of the original features weren't wrecked over the years. The low price is because very little was cosmetically updated in the 30-some years the previous owners held it. That's a bonus for me since we can make our own decisions about what to do, but Lee might have preferred something more finished.
If we hadn't been able to buy this one, we'd probably have gone with either the bungalow I liked a street over and 20K more expensive or one a block over and exactly in the same spot, a tiny bit smaller but updated with fireplaces and a garage, 60K more. The house next door to ours has just gone on the market at double the price with a lot of updates that are not to my taste, but I'm a little skeptical about whether the sellers will get that kind of money.
We'll be in the historical district, which is whiter and of course wealthier than the rest of the town. I'm pretty sure Mara's mother lives in or near the public housing that's 10 blocks or so away from us on the other side of town, which is also in many ways a whole different world.
I feel compelled to use this thread to celebrate my own milestone, which is to say my new apartment (settlement agreement signed, sealed, and delivered!). To tie this together with the pillow discussion, here is my couch, but on the other hand here is my bed.
Hooray for your couch! But nooooo, pillows, in re bed. (The apt. looks lovely, just from the walls, etc.)
The Times crossword requires a different level of support than does the sleeping head.
Is there a thread for celebrating the state of New York?
I guess this is it. Yay, my state! Or rather, it's about fucking time, my state.
Of course, this vote is entirely to blame for my divorce.
Just read at the NYTimes that New York has joined Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire and Vermont (and also DC). I did not realize that Iowa was on that list.
Anyway: yay!
In the words of one Republican senator, "Fuck it, I'm putting my queer shoulder to the wheel."
78: Mr Blandings Rents His Dream Apartment.
Blandings, that place looks gorgeous!
It's making me happy to see people celebrating the NY vote even though marriage legalizations don't seem to affect me the way they used to. Perhaps my grandma in Buffalo will start pressuring us to get married or something! I hope not, really, but I guess we'll see.
I had a funny moment whenever it was the first couple of states passed marriage equality, where I couldn't look at a gay couple without getting a sappy smile and thinking "You guys can get married now!" regardless of whether they had any plans in that direction. It passed in a couple of weeks, but I still occasionally get a wave of the same reaction when there's some marriage-equality related thing in the news.
LB, now's your chance to get in and make a name for yourself in the gay divorce field before it gets all flooded.
95: A reboot opportunity, if ever there was.
The "Animals Being Dicks" link from 19 isn't getting enough love. Definitely repays a little exploring just for poor "tophat cat" alone.
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Anyone else seen that image of a statue in a former Eastern Bloc country that's painted to look like it depicts superheroes? And the caption spraypainted beneath it is "B KRAK C BREMETO"? Context? Translation? From my Russian dictionary, I'm getting "on the cusp of history" as the most likely idiomatic translation, which I assume would be some stock phrase from Communist histories. Is is a WWII statue or a Oktober Revolution statue? Hard to tell.
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A dude with whom I went to grad school (a dude who went to lots of hard core shows and had waist-length hair) seems to be some kind of Tridentine super-Catholic these days (or rather, apparently always was). He posts noxious shit on Facebook about gay marriage and allowing women on the main floor during mass (???) -- but only ever in Italian. Last night he posted something idiotic about Obama owing the pope an apology for not condemning some diplomat in Rome who said something nice about gays. So I posted something passive-aggressive about biblical condemnation of men with long hair. He didn't take the bait -- boo.
... but only ever in Italian.
A recondite Loeb editions joke?
98
It isn't Russsian whatever it is. There are no 'R''s in Cyrillic.
101: Yes, that crack was a bit ghoulish.
103- they're Russian Rs. (Ps). http://geekmodeonline.com/soviet-war-statue-painted-over-to-resemble-superheroes/
105 continued- and I think it's in Bulgaria. Google translate gives "switched on" for the Bulgarian, but I don't know enough to even guess about if that's at all accurate.
... and this says the inscription means "in step with the times".
Below the graffiti artist has sprayed "Moving with the times" in Bulgarian black paint.
103: Sorry, my Volapuk is not all it might be. I had meant to use 'P'.
Yggles ...is surprised at the path LGBTs are taking to equality.
but I also do think it's worth pausing to acknowledge that the specific form the victory has taken is an interesting affirmation of the conservative streak running through American life.
Avner Greif, pdf via Wiki, explains it to MY
Historically, the institutions that secured ones life and property and mitigated problems of cooperation and conflicts were initially provided by large kinship groups. Subsequently, such institutions that rely on this family structure were complemented or replaced by those provided by self-interested rulers. Corporation-based institutions can substitute for those provided by both kinship groups and self-interested rulers. When they substitute kinship-based institutions, corporations are complementary to a different family structure, namely, the nuclear family structure.
I went looking because Meiji made a huge effort to change to the nuclear family. Of course, we are now past Fordism into an even higher degree of social atomization and alienation from support structures.
PS:Albany passes gay marriage and slashes social services. Yay. 21st century liberal politics to a T. Betcha Cuomo is running, and now has a small wedge against Obama.
You think Cuomo is running in 2012? Dude, put down the paint thinner.
I knew a guy in rehab (as a therapist) who would try to get huffers to do cocaine as it was so much safer. He may have been joking, but I couldn't say.
For LGBT activists, is there a consensus next progressive goal, after DADT repeal and same-sex marriage?
Next is helping you find true love.
116: Do I look like Kate Hudson?
No doing. Curvature of the Earth.
Almost certainly Bulgarian as the -to is one of their neato post-posed definite articles and I think they're the only ones that have that.
Curvature of the Earth.
Does the Earth look like Kate Hudson?
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Nice World Map from Rittholz on "High Net Worth Individuals" and how they have been doing since Obama protected their assets with the blood of labor the 2008 financial crash. Top 1% up 8.3% in net worth in US, up 5.4% in Japan, etc
Interesting "Female HNWI as percent of Regional Total"
37% in US, 31% in Japan, 18% in Europe and Latin America? Inheritance Law? Or maybe Japan is not as sexist as Europe, or sexist in some different way, a way more similar to the US
Oh and while I'm here. Digby on Ezra Klein's great plan to use "Chained CPI" to get revenues
The cuts from switching to the chained CPI may look small to some policy makers and editorial writers, but they would seriously affect the ability of many elderly beneficiaries to make ends meet. For example, the average monthly cost of food for a single elderly individual is $231 per month ($53 per week in 2010 dollars), based on national data from the Elder Economic Security Standard Index developed by Wider Opportunities for Women and the University of Massachusetts, Boston. Thus a benefit cut of $56 per month, or $672 per year-the cut at age 80 from the reduced COLA for an individual with an initial monthly benefit of $1,100-is equivalent to over a week's worth of food each month or 13 weeks of food that year." (Pg. 3)
Ezra Klein wants to take one week of food a month away from some old woman in order, to what, avoid raising taxes on people making over $150k? To make Obama look bipartisanly good?
I hate that evil fucker.
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92: The wedding I went to in CT a few weeks ago was for a gay couple from NY, and I had a similar reaction when I saw the news about Albany. I thought, "Are they gonna now get re-committed in NY?" But on reflection, I figure there's some sort of clause in the law itself (or maybe just Article IV of the Constitution?) that automatically starts recognizing all existing marriages from other states.
I mean, there must be, right?
113: that's a perfectly reasonable idea. huffing shit will kill you right that minute. cocaine is more of the killing you later, and long-term effects probably less bad on the whole. I have the opposite problem when I deal with people in all-addictions meeting who are addicted to stuff that won't get you high (tramadol) or is not even a drug (internet porn). I want them to get sober and all, but I sort of wish they had picked something fun if they were going to go through the hell of addiction and withdrawal. go all the way, people! heroin is hella fun! at the very least kick back with a bottle of cognac and a fat chronic sack. sleeping pills, jesus, what's the point. the former junkies in the room all do look at each other like, addict please. get addicted to something fun for fuck's sake. jerking off to internet porn is pretty fun and all, but it's no mainlining a speedball either. you going to wreck your life, get up on a bottle of maker's mark.
al, what happened to your friend with the acetominophen problem? Was she OK?
All right, will someone who can please remove the link in 45? Thank you for indulging me!
