Maybe he ate them, pooped them, and they plugged the toilet.

Trump seems like a guy in the habit of flushing once and not looking back, expecting staff to clean up whatever mess remains. Presumably this habit carried over to document destruction as well.

As I learned during my brief career as the part-time janitor for a small preschool, if you put a significant amount of torn up printer paper into a toilet, some of it is likely to get stuck and float back up.

He's on record as hating low-flow toilets.

"With all these handwritten notes, there's got to be some feces in here somewhere!"

Ugh. I just spent like an hour unclogging a toilet even without anything classified in it.

An HOUR? You deserve a very clean, antiseptic medal. Just thinking about it will probably give me literal nightmares.

I mean, I billed an hour.

It was really gross.

I'm still assuming the "retrieving classified documents" thing is mostly a cover, but I hadn't realized that in 2018 Congress passed and Trump signed a law increasing the maximum penalty for "unauthorized removal and retention of classified documents" from one year to five, and upgraded it to a felony.

Ironically, they called it the "Pwn Hillary Because This Will Never Bite Us On the Ass Act."

9 is delicious.

And once again a journo saved a possibly important story for their book.

9. Apparently he thought he'd be able to nail Clinton on that because private server. Then it turned out that it would have taken down Ivanka too.