Re: For Pride And Booty

1

Women's smooth, plump, hairless bodies give an unfair advantage in the water, and erections produce a lot of drage.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:07 PM
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I am sickly and behind the times. Is this the lifeguard who thought you were her roommates Persian friend? Or a new one?


Posted by: Ile | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:08 PM
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"drag". Pun. Heh.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:08 PM
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Or is the age approp lifeguard?


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:09 PM
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It's a different, bass-playing, age-appropriate lifeguard.

Sorry you're sick, Ile.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:11 PM
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This post is clearly coming down. Why should I comment?


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:13 PM
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First of all, live in the moment, w/d. Second of all, she's not going to find the blog and won't care if she does, so it's not coming down.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:14 PM
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Live in the moment, WD. What are you, a Platonist or something?


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:14 PM
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she's not going to find the blog and won't care if she does,

And my big brother could beat up your big brother...


Posted by: baa | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:15 PM
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Emerson and ogged grow more similar by the day, apparently.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:16 PM
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oh bp = bass playing. gotit.


well, tonight i find out if the girl I've been kinda sorta seeing is into me and was just really busy, or wanted to let me down easy. good thing work isn't stressful. at all.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:17 PM
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Good luck, tweedle!


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:18 PM
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She came in around 1:10

That's a lot worse than the 7.3 minute average.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:19 PM
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...if a girl beats a boy at something physical, the boy's chances of scoring that booty (yeah, I said "scoring that booty") plummet.

But if you let them beat you at chess (e.g., by not being any good at chess), they'll pity your brute stupidity and then you're in like sin.


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:19 PM
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/|

Language Log discovers the biscuit conditional?


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:22 PM
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if a girl beats a boy at something physical, the boy's chances of scoring that booty (yeah, I said "scoring that booty") plummet

This seems false to me, conditioning on the boy not being an ass about it both before and after he loses.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:22 PM
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if a girl beats a boy at something physical, the boy's girl's chances of scoring that booty (yeah, I said "scoring that booty") plummet.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:22 PM
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I'm trying to come up with something witty to say involving "breaststroke." Um....

How about we pretend I put it in italics, then underneath say, "I guess she didn't 'experiment' in college, then."


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:22 PM
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15: I wondered that, though they seem to be focusing on a different aspect of that kind of statement. Should we prepare a statement?


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:23 PM
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I would agree with 16, and with 17. Odds are (assuming she was interested), she's now wondering if she's scared you off.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:24 PM
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21

So when do you see her again?


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:25 PM
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...if a girl beats a boy at something physical, the boy's chances of scoring that booty (yeah, I said "scoring that booty") plummet.

I dunno. You could be really lucky and she turns out to be one of those domineering types. Like say Barbara Stanwyck (though hopefully a few years younger though you clearly are attracted to older women). But if you can directions and like women who sometimes are rough with you, you could be in for a great time.


Posted by: everhopeful | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:25 PM
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Cause you could be like, I know what I could beat you at, and I've never even done it before... and when it's over, you'll be smoking, she'll be crying, and you can be all "What??? I told you I was going to beat you to the finish."

sorry. had to.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:26 PM
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but thanks for the good luck wishes. I haven't got my hopes up.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:27 PM
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Even when I did swim competitively, I considered 100s a distance event.

So far she's sounding pretty awesome, so I would hope if she found the blog hopefully that will offset the part where she realizes that a few hundred of your clsoest imaginary friends are discussing her.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:27 PM
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A lot of lady athletes are attracted to closeted gays.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:28 PM
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7/5 on and dropping that she's found it already.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:28 PM
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17 is so, so right. When my first true love proved to be a far, far better distance runner than I was, she loved me for still desiring her. Also, this is what you do instead of saving the world? For shame. I hope you at least biked to the pool.


Posted by: anmik | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:29 PM
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26 should be the occasion for nominating Emerson for a Commenting Lifetime Achievement Award.


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:29 PM
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Nominated.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:30 PM
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Let's race a 500, ogged.


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:32 PM
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Hope it goes well, tweedle -- just don't lead in with the line from 23.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:32 PM
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33

32: That was for Ogged.

31: Let's race a 2.4 miler.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:34 PM
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34

Come on, she obviously felt bad after the 100 and let him win the 50.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:35 PM
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Anything over 50 isn't racing, it's attritting. Let's attrit a 500, you mean. Sorry, I don't attrit.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:35 PM
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in like sin.

Intriguing.

I bet she's found it, and told ogged, and he's just messing with us.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:36 PM
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1:10! that's pretty quick. is the udc2.0 swim meet still happening?


Posted by: water moccasin | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:37 PM
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Look, Robust was right in the other thread: even if she finds it, she'll be all "Oh, that's cool in a totally geeky and boring way," look at it for twenty seconds, maybe read the About Ogged page, and that'll be that.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:38 PM
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is the udc2.0 swim meet still happening?

I haven't heard anything about it. That's Will's baby.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:39 PM
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Or she'll start commenting here and Unfogged: The Completely Bizarre Age will begin.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:39 PM
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You live in a rich, full, fantasy world, Ogged.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:40 PM
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42

She let you win. It's an invitation.


Posted by: froz gobo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:40 PM
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Fortunately Ogged redacted the comparative thread, "All the vaginas I've loved before." Small-minded people found it icky.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:41 PM
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There are many kinds of people in the world, LB.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:42 PM
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gswift is correct in 34.


Posted by: m. leblanc | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:42 PM
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'ooty?

Oh, honey. You'd better hope she never finds this place.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:42 PM
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47

McManly called me honey!


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:43 PM
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48

You know what I hate? I hate students who cheat with the aim of getting a high D or low C.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:43 PM
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49

maybe read the About Ogged page, and that'll be that

Wouls she have reason to think "ogged" was you?


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:43 PM
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50

If the laps won't quit, you must attrit.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:45 PM
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Wouls she have reason to think "ogged" was you?

Huh, good point.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:45 PM
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49: Well, if she read all the "about" pages, she could figure out which ones he wasn't.

Although I guess given that "Becks" could be a man-pseudonym (mandonym?), and that Becks' "About Becks" says something about sucking on Alameida's rosy toes, he could be Becks.


Posted by: m. leblanc | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:46 PM
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I have literally no clue how competitive swimming works. When you say you swim "100s" and "50s", are we talking meters or miles? And is "1:10" seventy seconds or seventy minutes?

110 miles in seventy minutes sounds impressive to me. But like I said, I don't know much about swimming.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:47 PM
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Yards and seconds, Brock. Sometimes meters.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:48 PM
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'Cause the other options (according to the about pages) are married (unf), lives in philadelphia(bob), is an academic (FL) is a woman (LB), is a woman (Tia), is incomprehensible (w-lfs-n), married (apo).


Posted by: m. leblanc | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:48 PM
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What about Bob?


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:50 PM
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Oh, philidelphia. But he could be lying. That bastard.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:51 PM
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Three pair of pants (Unf), lives in Philadelphia (bob), and it never rains but it pours (FL).


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:54 PM
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59

She came in around 1:10 and beat me by two lengths.

No problem, that's within SESD. (Steroid Enhancement Striking Distance) Of course she might escalate by taking them as well.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 2:56 PM
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59: as a bonus, the enhancement will decrease the genitalia and the drag they create.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:02 PM
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I'd never raced a 100 before, and it's surprising how much room there is for strategy in even such a short race. Not to mention the need to establish a sane breathing pattern, which I failed to do.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:03 PM
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No excuses, ogged.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:05 PM
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63

Also provided he doesn't take them down his latest posts about dating a bass playing lifeguard might be a tipoff.


Posted by: CJB | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:07 PM
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No excuses, ogged.

Oh, I would have lost anyway, I'm just remarkin'.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:07 PM
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65

This is all an elaborate cover to hide the fact that he's dating Bitch PhD.


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:08 PM
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100 is the one true race. the very good can use the "as fast as you can the whole way" strategy, but for the rest of us there's room for mind games.

breathe every three or four as long as you can, then finish it by any means necessary.


Posted by: water moccasin | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:09 PM
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Unfogged is not just the top three but the ONLY three hits on Google for "bass-playing lifeguard."

Oh, are you screwed. (And not in a good way, either.)


Posted by: Magpie | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:11 PM
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The lifeguard on deck said I was mostly breathing every four, but every nine going in and coming out of the turns. I was a bit gassed by 75 and just put my head down for the last 25, but I couldn't catch her. I think it's probably true that the 100 is the one true race: speed and stamina; but I'm sticking to the fifties, and breaststroke at that.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:11 PM
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Why in the world would she look up bass-playing lifeguard? (Not to mention that she has no internet connection at home, and seems to be either at work or at a club the entire rest of the time.)


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:12 PM
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If ogged wants the 50 and will the 100, there will be no race in DC. Drat.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:13 PM
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69: Peak anaerobic performance can be maintained by the very fit for up to 45-50 seconds. Makes the 100 yd/meter swims and 400 yd/meter runs quite "special" if you can get under those times.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:16 PM
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Oh, I'll race a 100; I'm kind of fascinated by the strategy now. But Will said he didn't want to race, just work out.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:16 PM
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71 is exactly right. The 100m swim/400m run is the right comparison. The 100m freestyle record is just under 48 seconds (long course).


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:18 PM
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I'll race with anyone. I'd like to get tips from Will too.

Ogged, what's your breathing pattern? I like the 2-3-2-3 pattern, but then again, I never stop at 100.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:19 PM
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The lifeguard on deck said I was mostly breathing every four, but every nine going in and coming out of the turns. I was a bit gassed by 75 and just put my head down for the last 25, but I couldn't catch her. I think it's probably true that the 100 is the one true race: speed and stamina; but I'm sticking to the fifties, and breaststroke at that.

200 im is the second true race; 50 breaststroke only counts as part of a relay. as for turns, those are the most important times not to breathe so you need to breathe a little more between the walls to get out of oxygen debt. maybe try every three next time?


Posted by: water moccasin | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:20 PM
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I don't have a pattern, exactly. That's the problem. Well, that and the fact that even when I turn my head, I don't always remember to inhale. You can see why I like the fifties.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:20 PM
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50 breaststroke only counts as part of a relay

Gratuitous meanness, moccasin. It's a technical stroke; I think of it as mastering something like a golf swing.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:22 PM
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No. Technical is the butterfly. Breaststroke (which was the only thing I was ever good at) is for lazy people who want to breath on every stroke.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:25 PM
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breaststroke is also good for people with serious neuroses and other signs of mental instability. i always felt that it required bigger lungs than any other stroke because you have to spend so much time on the underwater pullouts.


Posted by: water moccasin | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:33 PM
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not out of any meanness toward breastrokers, some of my best friends swam it.


Posted by: water moccasin | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:33 PM
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81

Nah, butterfly is a rhythm stroke (and Phelps breathes every stroke when he swims it).

Have we chased everyone else away? Swim talk it up!


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:33 PM
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Let's race a 500, ogged.

But Slol, if you win he won't sleep with you; and if he wins, you won't sleep with him.

boys beat girls at physical stuff, and, perhaps infinitesimally more controversially, if a girl beats a boy at something physical, the boy's chances of scoring that booty

Mr. B. once scored by telling a woman Marine that the reason Air Force guys are so fat is because they need something to survive on until the Marine chicks come and rescue them.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:36 PM
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83

you have to spend so much time on the underwater pullouts

God, I hate that. I just swam all out for a length so I get to...hold my breath!

Funny thing: After our hundred race, the regulars were laughing at me as I gasped for air and I said "This sucks" and they said "When you think it sucks, you're a real swimmer."


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:36 PM
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78: Butterfly is for insane physical freaks whose shoulder blades can fold together like some kind of insect. (Not sure what kind - I have no physical imagination.) My theory is the day will come when the 50 freestyle record will be held by someone swimming butterfly.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:36 PM
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Why in the world would she look up bass-playing lifeguard?

Because every time you say "she's never going to find this," her odds of suddenly wanting to Google "bass-playing lifeguard" double. At this point they're approaching 1.


Posted by: Magpie | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:37 PM
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86

Rank primitive superstition, Magpie. She's never going to find this.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:38 PM
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her odds of suddenly wanting to Google "bass-playing lifeguard" double. At this point they're approaching 1.

"approaching 1" isn't really the right phrase to use to describe the progress of iterated doubling. That is not exactly an asymptotic situation.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:39 PM
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I forgot. Backstoke... for complete ninnies.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:40 PM
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89

But Slol, if you win he won't sleep with you; and if he wins, you won't sleep with him.

Sounds like a win-win!


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:42 PM
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Redact this motherfucking swimming thread! She just likes to swim, she doesn't want to be bored to death by people she suspects are making smutty comments about her ass.

Or else return to making smutty comments, but Jesus, no mas!


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:42 PM
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83: You have to admit that at some level competitive swimming in pools (and what you have to do to be good at it) is really pretty fucked up.

And depending how you look at it, it is either the absolute best or worst sport for head cases.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:42 PM
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91: Why so?


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:43 PM
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92/91: no more so than any other competitive sport, for appropriate values of "good at it".


Posted by: water moccasin | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:44 PM
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94

Good luck, ogged.


Posted by: Klug | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:46 PM
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95

Head down in a chemical soup - hours a day... that is what ultimately got to me.

Really it has a lot of goodness too (non-impact etc.) but I do notice that a lot of ex-swimmers can barely tolerate pools - they cease to be a place where one could imagine relxing and having fun.

But 93 is actually pretty right. I sometimes just have these spasms of retroactive hate-ons for many lost hours. (And Morning Practice in Northern winters.)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:48 PM
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Swimming has always seemed to me a better sport than most--whole body workout, cardio blah blah, plus, you know, it's actually a skill that's useful in and of itself.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:48 PM
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Ah. Yeah, chlorine pools are kind of cruddy. I wish the local CC pool were saltwater.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:49 PM
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The pool I swim at is actually ozonated and only lightly chlorinated, which is great, and which I really notice when I swim anywhere else, where I can practically feel the chlorine gas escaping from the water.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:51 PM
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I will also add that too many hours of working around pools: lifeguarding, coaching, "skimming", putting lane lines in and out, cleaning filters, doing the chemicals, crawling around the filter room, etc. can also detract from the "fun" of pools in later years.



Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 3:57 PM
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100

Not to mention the higher incidence of asthma in people who've spent a lot of time in/around indoor pools.

This is probably the place to note that Kobe swims the 100 in 10 seconds.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 4:02 PM
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she has no internet connection at home

I think we all know how this is going to end. Well, that this is going to end.


Posted by: Wrongshore | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 4:04 PM
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101 - Yep. She's going to start sleeping with Ogged for his internet connection.

Be used, Ogged!


Posted by: Becks | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 4:44 PM
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103

Be used

I love this as a potential way of saying good-bye.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 4:46 PM
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104

I don't even own an internet connection.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:11 PM
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I love this as a potential way of saying good-bye.

Be used to each other.


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:15 PM
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106

104: No base players for you, then.


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:15 PM
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Thanks Ogged, and for the clariifcation. Not that my opinion matters, but I am all in favor of bass players.

This summer I started taking swimming lessons at the Y, partially inspired by ogged (awwww), but the chlorine was really bothering my sinuses. Not as much as the bacteria are bothering them now. I should look for a saltwater pool. . .that sounds kinda nice. Wouldn't be more buoyant too?


Posted by: Ile | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:20 PM
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It would be more buoyant, but I don't know of any saltwater (or ozonated) pools in the bay area. Surprising.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:27 PM
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And thus it was that Johnny Oggedlsalt found his mission in life.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:35 PM
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What, no recumbent dealers and no saltwater pools? The Bay Area is so over.


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:36 PM
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I don't know. I spar women a lot. If someone lands a solid punch, it's cool. Not really in a flirtatious way, but close competition is more fun.

If I was on the dating market, it certainly wouldn't put me off.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:49 PM
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It would be more buoyant, but I don't know of any saltwater (or ozonated) pools in the bay area. Surprising.

If only there were a large body of saltwater somewhere nearby.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:50 PM
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112: Isn't it full of oil right now, though? I guess that would make for extra resistance.

Ogged: man up!


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:53 PM
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114

You first.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:55 PM
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115

Wait a minute, ogged, I just now read this:

beat me by two lengths

It took you 1:10 to swim a 50? Man, you *are* slow.


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:56 PM
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Three hours later you resort to the deliberate misunderstanding maneuver, slol? Why not just throw rotten tomatoes?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 5:58 PM
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No, this is a real misunderstanding. A 100 is four lengths, isn't it? She beat you by two lengths? She finished at 1:10? Therefore it took you 1:10 to swim two lengths? What have I got wrong?


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:01 PM
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If I was on the dating market, it certainly wouldn't put me off.

I think AWB is right that there are guys who will be put off by a woman who beats them, but there are also a lot of guys who think it's hot. But I'm sticking to the claim that it's always bad for the guy to be beaten.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:01 PM
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No, this is a real misunderstanding.

In that case, you're banned so that you don't hurt yourself with that keyboard thingy. Two body lengths, man.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:03 PM
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Oh. I think I'll go have a drink to inaugurate my bannination.


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:04 PM
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I too am outta here.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:05 PM
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Try not to get knifed, O-man.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:12 PM
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What's with the elided "b" in the final instance of "booty" in the post? Is it some obnoxious California thing, like "natch"?


Posted by: Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:16 PM
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little trout
swimming west while blossoms
flow east

(Issa)


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:16 PM
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Is it some obnoxious California thing, like "natch"?

With an elided "s", presumably.


Posted by: Knecht Ruprecht | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:18 PM
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slolernr, slolernr, bo-bolernr,
bannination no-nolernr
Fee-fi-mo-molerner
'olernr!


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:23 PM
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I think AWB is right that there are guys who will be put off by a woman who beats them, but there are also a lot of guys who think it's hot.I think AWB is right that there are guys who will be put off by a woman who beats them, but there are also a lot of guys who think it's hot.

Sadomasochism being, while somewhat more common than I Don't Pay has been led to believe, still not totally ubiquitous.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:32 PM
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It's great that ogged is finally dating, of course, but I worry about its impact on Unfogged. Already he sounds happier, more relaxed...if he begins to affect the breezy tones of a devil-may-care optimist, it will be the end of this blog.


Posted by: Invisible Adjunct | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:35 PM
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if he begins to affect the breezy tones of a devil-may-care optimist gets laid, it will be the end of this blog

Fixed.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:38 PM
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I'm sure he'll find some way to autocockblock before things get to that point.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:40 PM
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Good point. From the expert. [/ducks]


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:42 PM
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I contribute my expert advice freely, for the good of the blog.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:47 PM
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What's with the elided "b" in the final instance of "booty" in the post?


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:48 PM
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I actually have several strong possibilities right now, most of which I have not yet mentioned here. I'm sure I'll figure out ways to autocockblock my way out of all of them, of course.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:49 PM
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"Natch" is a Californianism? Seriously?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:49 PM
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133: [s] and [b] are pretty different sounds, 'ro.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:50 PM
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"Natch" is a Californianism?

I don't know it to be specifically Californian. That's just Kotsko's wintertime affective mood disorder resentment talking.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:51 PM
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I return briefly to relate a goofy swimming story of my own:

Today in an ordinary public place full of people I ran into a woman who previously I have only ever seen in the pool. We work out at about the same time and swim similar sets, but have rarely exchanged more than a nod. So of course it took me a second to recognize her and vice versa. And of course, loudly and in complete unthinking innocence: "Gosh, I didn't recognize you with your clothes on."


Posted by: slolernr | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:51 PM
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136: Don't 'other him now, teo. He's trying to 'ang some 'ass player.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:51 PM
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That's just Kotsko's wintertime affective mood disorder resentment talking.

Kotsko would make a great recipient of the mix I'm working on now (tentative title: Ain't No Cure for the Wintertime Blues).


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:54 PM
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I'll 'other him whenever I damn well please.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:54 PM
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He's trying to 'ang some 'ass player.

You mean Labs, right?


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:54 PM
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"Gosh, I didn't recognize you with your clothes on."

There's a cute old yiddish dude at the pool who says this to everyone and slays himself every time.

"yiddish dude"


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:54 PM
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Further to 142: Labs' col legno technique is storied throughout the land.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:55 PM
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I've heard Labs could beat ogged by two lengths.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:56 PM
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143 might be gayer than 46.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:56 PM
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Just wait until Labs moves into thumb position.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 6:59 PM
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Labs likes to use rosin instead of lube for extra tightness.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 7:00 PM
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Ogged: "Slap that 'ass, Labsy!"


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 7:00 PM
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It's all fun and games till Labs hits the brown note.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 7:04 PM
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His fingering isn't so great but he can hammer on with the best of them.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 7:35 PM
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While Labs frets, ogged frets.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 7:46 PM
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hmmm... appears i may have acb'd myself... no call from the girl tonight... i hate gut feels.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 9:31 PM
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OT: Teo, are you still here? If so, let me know if you're interested in talking to planners about what the work is like.


Posted by: anmik | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 9:40 PM
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Likewise, Teo. I can put you in touch with a couple of planners here.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 10:11 PM
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Thanks, guys. I don't think I'm quite at the point of talking to planners about the work yet, but I'll keep your offers in mind for when I am.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 10:46 PM
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I can't hear/read "natch" without thinking of Le Trente-Huit Cunegonde. This doesn't reflect well on the person using it.


Posted by: NĂ¡pi | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 10:53 PM
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When the lifeguard finds this place, it'll be like that scene in Psycho where they find his mom in the basement.


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 11:14 PM
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Totally awesome, you mean?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 11:17 PM
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Or just that she'll be appalled by ogged's lack of skill at taxidermy?


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-14-07 11:17 PM
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Re: 120

Banishment.


Posted by: Amit | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:32 AM
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Maybe he's getting married.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:34 AM
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Re: 162

Either that, or he's finally been accepted into the Legion of Substitute Heroes. This, as you know, requires the signature of their leader, Polar Boy (aka Brek Bannin).


Posted by: Amit | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:19 AM
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is the udc2.0 swim meet still happening?

So much to do. So little time. I'll swim/race/coach if I can get there early or maybe the next morning if I spend the night. Bring your suits if you want. If we can get in a pool and anyone is interested, I would happily spend some time helping people with their strokes.

I'm still not sure what the plan is. The gf may come or her college girls may be gathering here.

I had hoped to take the Armsmasher art tour, but I suspect that he isnt really serious. (After all, I never received my cd.)


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 9:39 AM
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i'm interested in the art tour too, but if threads are this intimidating i can't imagine myself entering into a room full of strangers
well, i can read Armsmasher's blog anytime


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 9:47 AM
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i'm interested in the art tour too, but if threads are this intimidating i can't imagine myself entering into a room full of strangers

read, my understanding is the only thing to fear is Bitch or Apo licking your cheek.

But, I could be wrong.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 9:53 AM
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read, it takes some getting used to, but the teasing around here is (mostly) a sign of affection.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 10:36 AM
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the only thing to fear is Bitch or Apo licking your cheek

I promise I'll behave. Through the first four beers.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 10:52 AM
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well. i would have loved to fool around a little longer
but you people were really inquisitive
and guessed who i am pretty quickly

now, shigoto shigoto


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 10:55 AM
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So you're safe from apo for about 15 minutes or so.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:10 AM
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I had hoped to take the Armsmasher art tour, but I suspect that he isnt really serious.

I'd thought that you of all people would understand my fear of commitment.

The art tour is on! But it's difficult to plot with everyone's schedules, which I only vaguely appreciate. Maybe the best thing to do is to put up a post saying when I'll be going to what museums and galleries, and for whoever would like to come along: get on the bus. It's a nice time to see shows, since everyone is out of town, so I'm planning to hit almost all these places anyway.

I'm only going to hit up the Kreeger, though, if sufficient interest warrants renting a Zipcar (or if someone in town who wants to go has a car). I really wish that I could take everyone to the Glenstone, but I must humbly admit that I have yet to score an invitation myself, and probably never well, because M/tch Ral3s scorns the press.

i'm interested in the art tour too, but if threads are this intimidating

You should only feel physically intimidated by the prospect of the tour. I mean, check the pseud.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:23 AM
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166/168: To wit.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:25 AM
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She came in around 1:10 and beat me by two lengths.

17 is crazy. I can't be the only one who thinks this is totally hot.


Posted by: Lambent Cactus | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:34 AM
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OT: I'm worried my school is about to be sieged by conservatives.


Posted by: destroyer | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:38 AM
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I was curious, so I Googled "Unfoggedcon*". Over 400 results. I had expected many fewer. Seems to be a bunch of bots out there sucking up info and reposting it. Still, it is very obscure.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:41 AM
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How do you get 400 results? I get 39.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:47 AM
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I get 425, 429 with the asterisk at the end.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:53 AM
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The search I used was "unfoggedcon*" (all in quotes). It gets me 429 results. But even without the wildcard I get 425.

Some of the links are already dead, like the one for this taggregator: realcountyestate.org/tags/com-florida
(the florida avenue flophouse got keyed there.)

But this link is still good: myFeedz.

Weird world.



Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:53 AM
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re: 173

There are definitely blokes out there who get intimidated. But, if you are already an arrogant bastard someone confident on yourself, then, yeah, it can be totally hot.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:53 AM
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shite, strikethrough didn't work. Rendering that comment meaningless.

Should have read:

There are definitely blokes out there who get intimidated. But, if you are already an arrogant bastard someone confident in yourself, then, yeah, it can be totally hot.



Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:55 AM
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Ah, ok, I wasn't seeing the hidden results. 421 now. But if you add -site:unfogged.com, it drops back down to twenty-something.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:57 AM
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Funny, I thought of the word taggregator while trying to describe those sites. I even puzzled over the "right" way to spell it (one G or two?). After posting it I wondered, how many other folks have thought of that coinage? Yup, thousands of hits and the preferred spelling matches my intuitions. Nothing new under the sun even when it is new.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 11:59 AM
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When I eliminate this site, I get 233 results. Hmm.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:02 PM
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Sorry, me too, I was forgetting to show hidden results again.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:06 PM
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Maybe the best thing to do is to put up a post saying when I'll be going to what museums and galleries, and for whoever would like to come along: get on the bus.

I think that's a great idea. Will the post be here on your blog?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:10 PM
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My other explanation was that you had pissed off the Great and Powerful Wizard of Google.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:11 PM
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Oops, left out an "or" after "here" in 185.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:11 PM
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I'd thought that you of all people would understand my fear of commitment.

I do and I appreciate it.

OT: As we type, my son is wearing a burnt orange hat with a picture of horns on it. Should I be concerned?


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:19 PM
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Hey Will, have you checked out this site?

And you all should be watching the Stranahan clips in the new post.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:22 PM
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OT: As we type, my son is wearing a burnt orange hat with a picture of horns on it. Should I be concerned?

My understanding is that the Longhorns have very nice swimming facilities.

And you all should be watching the Stranahan clips in the new post.

I watched them. They're good. I just enjoy seeing your post languish without any comments.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:43 PM
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i think bpl sounds awesome. please don't autocockblock, ogged. you told her about the site; have you told her you're going to a massive party in celebration of it in between christmas and new years?


Posted by: catherine | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:43 PM
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Damn. Rob ruined it.

Way to bring down the site, helpy-chalk.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:45 PM
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Having bpl hanging around at UnfoggeDCon II: The Chamberpot of Secrets would totally interfere with ogged's plans to put the moves on you, catherine.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:46 PM
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18: what, that he's got the devil in him?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:47 PM
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194: Well, the devil has been known to lead people into experimentation in college, I guess.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:49 PM
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Ogged is properly modest. He wouldn't say he is having a party when you folks on Florida Avenue are the hosts. Also, what M/th said.



Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:50 PM
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I rushed 193. Perhaps "The Chamber of Secret Identities" would have been better.

Or "The Closet of Secrets".

Or something.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:52 PM
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M/th s/b M/tch. Drop one letter and others fall too.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:53 PM
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The Chamber of See-Tits


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:53 PM
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And perhaps this should have been "Electric Blogaloo".

Ah well, hindsight is 20/400.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 12:55 PM
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I suspect the only person I'll lick this year will be the boyfriend. Maybe leblanc.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:29 PM
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My understanding is that the Longhorns have very nice swimming facilities.

Buried in some drawer, I have a University of Texas Swimming workout shirt that says "Cheat on your girlfriend, not on your workout."


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:30 PM
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Ogged, the first video is from University of Arizona where i trained one summer.

"Kickin it in Arizona" I was easily the slowest kicker there that summer.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:34 PM
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201: I think it would be nifty if you started referring to him as "PB".


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:38 PM
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204: I'll see if he's okay with that plan. He actually wouldn't care if I used his name.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:38 PM
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While you're at it, ask him if you can post the pictures of you licking him that you are going to take at UnfoggeDCon.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:48 PM
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205: But just think of all the potential sandwich and Reese's jokes!


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:50 PM
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I'm willing to bet that it will actually be someone else taking the pictures, rob.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 1:50 PM
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206: No.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 2:14 PM
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209: It seems rather caddish of you to post the pictures without first asking his permission, B.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 2:18 PM
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He's used to my utter disdain for his privacy.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 2:21 PM
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re: 69 & 86

stranger things have happened, ogged.


Posted by: nosandals | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 2:58 PM
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Now that's pwnage.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 3:02 PM
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Damn. Indeed.


Posted by: ogged | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 3:40 PM
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214: Heh.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 3:43 PM
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I'm going to come out to Cali and party with nosandals and BPL.


Posted by: Becks | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 3:45 PM
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no more stalking for you then


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 6:08 PM
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no call. the end, i guess.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 9:00 PM
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218: you can still have sex with teo, tweedle.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 9:02 PM
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C'mere, tweedle. I still love you.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-15-07 9:04 PM
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...if a girl beats a boy at something physical, the boy's chances of scoring that booty (yeah, I said "scoring that booty") plummet.

Ogged, do you, like, not watch any Woody Allen at all?! Just tell her to "say something nice", or "as Balzac said, here goes another novel", or "the body does not lie", or "if I ever knew I'll date a girl that uses phrases like la di da", and you're back in.

In general, unless you are supremely athletic, it's much better to completely lose at physical stuff than to beat her by a hair length, if you can spin it right. You're constructing a proper gender-f*c|< relationship,and isn't that what men want nowadays, anyway? (rhetorical question).


Posted by: E1ad | Link to this comment | 12-16-07 6:26 AM
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212: oh, snap!


Posted by: alameida | Link to this comment | 12-16-07 9:06 AM
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219/220: yeah, um... not so much.


Posted by: tweedledopey | Link to this comment | 12-16-07 9:14 PM
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Your loss.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 12-16-07 9:16 PM
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