Re: Davy Jones Locker Room

1

That's some really outstanding work, ogged. Where'd you get it done?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:21 PM
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2

I'm sure I've seen that somewhere before, but I can't remember where.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:22 PM
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3

That penis damn well be better attached to something. Penis-thieving mer-men!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:24 PM
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4

That is hardcore mercock. How fun for the tat artist! "Wait, you want a huge tattoo on your back, and it's not an eagle, or a flag, or a deformed-ass picture of your three-year-old daughter? Woo!"


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:24 PM
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5

Excellent title, Ogged.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:25 PM
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6

Despite the missing apostrophe.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:25 PM
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7

So is this the NSFW thread? Because:

If you did biology at school, you should remember that the arsehole is a ring of muscle called the anal sphincter. Above that is a chamber called the rectum. The size of this chamber is roughly proportional to the size of the person it belongs to. Thus the rectum of a small person will be small. If you have large hands it may not be practical to try to fist someone who is only 1.75m (5'6") tall.

Goddamit I'm not doing it to be practical.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:26 PM
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4: Or a dragon!

Props for the title.

You know, I'd never considered that about mermen.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:26 PM
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9

I like the hagfish off on the right-hand side that thinks it's found a friend.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:28 PM
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10

How come mermen get to have human cocks, but mermaids are stuck with invisible fish genitalia?


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:29 PM
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2: I'm sure I've seen that somewhere before, but I can't remember where.

On the Little Mermaid VCR cover.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:30 PM
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12

You're not at work...

Workshiftist.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:37 PM
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helpy-chalk: objectively anti-cloacae.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:42 PM
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10: mermaids are stuck with invisible fish genitalia? I thought the tattoo in question proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that the mermen get stuck sometimes too.

At first glance I thought that the proud, haughty cock on the right had extruded a little hand to grip the anterior merman's penis. That would be some good tentacle porn!


Posted by: minneapolitan | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 8:44 PM
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On the Little Mermaid VCR cover.

I believe you're actually thinking of The Little Spermaid.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:00 PM
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16

I think Alameida should post her tatoo now to offset this one.


Posted by: will | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:07 PM
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16: here you go, will(y).


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:09 PM
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18

Why are you all so dirty minded? That's just a sea lamprey, sucking all the vital fluids from the poor mermen.


Posted by: Peppi Orgon | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:11 PM
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15: Hmmm, maybe. You mean this?
Does SpermAid Treatment Affect Spontaneous Erection and Masturbation in Stallions?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:12 PM
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20

11: We did actually have that tape when I was a kid, but I never noticed the penis on it.


Posted by: teofilo | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:17 PM
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21

19: Oh, and short answer is "No".

The long answer includes: Four stallions were also manually stimulated while mounted on a dummy mount or on the ground while three stallions were stimulated using a Missouri style artificial vagina* while mounted on a dummy mount.

*Show Me


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:19 PM
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22

a dummy mount

I object to this characterization. That mount was no dummy.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:22 PM
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23

Wow. More than I ever wanted to know about stallion sex toys. (Marital aids?)


Posted by: Bave Dee | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:27 PM
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24

Missouri-style artificial vagina. Missouri-style artificial vagina.

Missouri-style artificial vagina.

Wow.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:30 PM
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25

I guess now we know the subtext behind this story.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:32 PM
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23: In action.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:33 PM
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21: Huh, now there's something I've never really thought about.

Attachable at the distal end is some form of collection apparatus to capture the ejaculated semen, this apparatus will often include a filter of some sort to remove the gel fraction of the ejaculate and any detritus such as smegma.
One hopes for the sake of the people who have to handle this stuff that stallion smegma is one of those prized mammalian bodily fluids, like ambergris.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:33 PM
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28

||

Know what's awesome? I came home and there was no electricity. After searching for and futzing with the breakers, and then noticing that the power in every other unit was on, I went through the roommate's mail pile by the light of my laptop and found a "48-hour notice" from PG&E.

Turns out he hasn't paid them since 12/27. Awesome. I just credit carded them $600.96 over the phone so that we can get our power back tomorrow. The roommate's in Tahoe. Looks like no On Demand tonight. Time to find a bar/coffee shop.

|>


Posted by: Otto von Bisquick | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:34 PM
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29

Stallions and more, Bave. Knock yourself out.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:36 PM
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30

27: I take it you've never seen Jackass 2.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:36 PM
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29: The link that finally caused my roommate, looking over my shoulder, to comment, "Hmph, I didn't know dragons had penises. I thought they laid eggs."


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:41 PM
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32

30: No, and now I wish I could unsee it.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:44 PM
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I was looking for video of lizard sex so I could show Stanley's roommate that many lizards actually have quite anthropomorphic penes, but instead I stumbled on the greatest youtube comment of all time:

I want to see lizards fucking... Not listen to crappy "hardcore" music. You fail at life.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:46 PM
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30: And per the pictures in the link in 21, I think they are using an honest-to-god Missouri-style artificial vagina.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:48 PM
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35

33: I appreciate your efforts, Sifu.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:50 PM
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36

Horse Cock Phepner


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:51 PM
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34: it certainly seems that way.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 9:51 PM
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38

||
I just ripped my first CD to our brand-new Time Capsule. 1TB, bitches.

(Although it didn't exactly "just work".)
|>


Posted by: Josh | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 10:15 PM
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I was so busy thinking, "That's rubbish; a merman doesn't have a penis," that it took me about 15 seconds to notice the giant ejaculating cocks on either side. That's so ugly.

Those animal dildo people might get more sales if they had decent photos of their wares - those ones look like they were taken with someone's phone.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 10:47 PM
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40

As long as you're mod-blogging, why not go all out?


Posted by: ed bowlinger | Link to this comment | 03- 5-08 11:25 PM
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How come mermen get to have human cocks, but mermaids are stuck with invisible fish genitalia?

Magritte resolved this question.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 03- 6-08 2:02 AM
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42

I love learning new things, such as the fact that the Roanoke-style artificial vagina allows for great bell pressure on penis glans, which is preferred by some stallions. I did not know this.

Except... next time I go to Wes's Missouri-style barbecue I won't be able to avoid thinking about artificial vaginas. Thanks.

(Seriously, Firefox spell-check? You recognize "vagina" but not "vaginas"? I guess it's vaginae.)


Posted by: mrh | Link to this comment | 03- 6-08 5:59 AM
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43

So, this is the underwater sex blog!


Posted by: My Alter Ego | Link to this comment | 03- 6-08 7:05 AM
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44

Missouri vagina; Texas catheter


Posted by: Tom | Link to this comment | 03- 6-08 8:24 AM
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45

That picture touches off a kind of "awww, isn't that sweet?" response in me. Like when one sees puppies and kittens doing cute things.


Posted by: Neil the Ethical Werewolf | Link to this comment | 03- 6-08 10:46 AM
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