Re: How The Geebies Spent Their Money

1

How do you get the cat to stand still for the vacuuming?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 7:39 PM
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This vacuum comes with bungee cords!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 7:40 PM
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God, I really want a new vacuum. My friend has a dyson (inherited) which I borrowed once and now I desperately covet one.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 7:43 PM
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Don't make me start with the Hoover-lover links.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 7:44 PM
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Sounds like your vacuum really sucks, heebie.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 7:48 PM
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We are on our second Ricoh, which we work to overload and send to the shop every six months. See there is a doggy door and a backyard of bare caliche. "Dust" doesn't describe our problem. "Chunks" is closer. Blow on it and it doesn't move.

Also have a Eureka shampooer, but add water to caliche and you very quickly need to disassemble the machine.

"I" need to disassemble the machine. With a screwdriver. Anyway, I vacumn daily.


Posted by: bob mcmanus | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 7:53 PM
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The Geebies could have put that on their wedding gift list! They thought they didn't need anything. Hah.

Are you sure you don't need a, um, let's see. Vacuum cleaner is about it in that category. Shoot. I guess you can't really ask for mops and brooms.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 7:58 PM
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I haven't found bagless vacs to be up to the hype. We bought a bagged Eureka from Costco that got a good review from Consumer's Digest. Works as well or better than anything else we've owned and cost a lot less.

http://www.costco.com/Browse/Product.aspx?Prodid=11297982


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:02 PM
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Bagless is fun because you get to see exactly how much you just vacuumed up. I didn't know that it generated much hype, but I'll join the fray.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:05 PM
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1: My aunt used to vacuum her cat.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:09 PM
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With a Flowbee?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:10 PM
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"It's sucking my will to live!"


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:11 PM
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I used to vacuum cats, until the plea bargain and the consent agreement. Maybe I shouldn't have used a shop vac?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:12 PM
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We just bought a Roomba. I'm not sure what I think about this new world of easily anthropomorphized household appliances.


Posted by: Gabardine Bathyscaphe | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:15 PM
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Posted by: | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:16 PM
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Roombas are the dance craze that's sweeping the nation.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:17 PM
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16: If only bumping into walls and spinning around in confusion had been the ticket to popularity at dances back when I was in middle school. To think that all my gangliness was wasted!


Posted by: Gabardine Bathyscaphe | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:25 PM
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My Miele vaccum cleaner stopped working a couple of months ago, and I hadn't realized until then how very much I appreciated it. Then I changed the bags and filters, ran a bunch of water down the tube, discharged a great snarled clog of human hair, and restored it to service! A tale of vacuum lost and found!

Anyway, the Miele is great.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 8:26 PM
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We like the Kenmore canister vacuum we got last year. HEPA! Powered brushes! Pet/stair cleaning attachment! Who knew there had been improvements in domestic tech? Also, vacuum cleaner bags are wicked cheap on eBay.


Posted by: Nathan Williams | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 9:12 PM
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14/16: It's pretty much all we need. No kids or pets and not much carpet ....


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-17-09 9:20 PM
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So I take it the Roomba isn't worth the hundreds of pounds it costs in the UK, then? Shame, because I'm lazy enough that I would have spent it if I knew it could replace my proper vacuum.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:49 AM
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Best used for a customised Roomba I've seen yet.

Gswift notwithstanding, having got a Dyson (or equivalent knock-off), I could never use anything else.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:07 AM
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20 is pleasingly ambiguous between two interpretations:

1) "we only need a Roomba to keep our house clean, because it's a fairly easy house to clean - not many carpets, and no kids or dogs to cause serious mess"

and

2) "we led a comfortless, joyless life - no kids or pets to brighten our lives with their activity and chatter, and not even a carpet to soften the heavy, deadly thuds of our footfalls on the wooden floor as we tramp bleakly towards the grave - but now we have a Roomba and our lives are made happy by its cheerful spinning and bumbling!"


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:09 AM
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I would totally put microfiber mop supplies and cloths on some sort of registry. The more the better so that you can wash them up in a load with just microfiber cloths with fabric-softener-free detergent.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 5:07 AM
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My BF's parents have a central vacuum in their basement. You plug tubes into holes on each floor.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 5:09 AM
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10: A friend used to have a deaf Siamese cat she could vacuum. Ours teleport out of the vicinity of a running vacuum cleaner.

They also leave a cat's weight of fur on everything every day without losing weight themselves. There's a thesis in that for someone.


Posted by: Biohazard | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 5:44 AM
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"It's sucking my will to live!"

There are worse things.

I had a Roomba. I gave it away.


Posted by: Will | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:39 AM
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we have a Dyson "Animal", and two long-haired cats. don't let em fool you - Dysons will lose suction, if the bottom filter gets clogged (which it often does). and when this happens, the Animal doesn't just lose a little suction - it loses all suction, as the intake switches to a little overload port on the back, when it can't get air through the normal pathway.


Posted by: cleek | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:41 AM
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I admit to having lust in my heart for one of those Dyson Ball vacuums. But it also triggers my "that's too expensive!" reflex, so all I do is pine.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:14 AM
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28: That's outrageous! I've heard that guy talk about how the Dyson won't lose suction like other vacuums at least a 1000 times.
Can't we sue?

(I don't actually own a Dyson, but I think I should get some money for the emotional pain caused by being lied to over and over)


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:14 AM
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I've never heard of a Dyson. Sometimes Unfogged makes me feel uninformed in the most novel ways.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:18 AM
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31: Oh, you're just showing off now. You don't own a TV, right? Or you own a TV, but it's been years since you watched a show with commercials?


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:23 AM
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I think we're actually an ideal Roomba family - 90% hardwood, tons of dog fur - but it hasn't been a priority.

The Hoover my dad gave me for Xmas 12-13 years ago is still going strong, thanks to periodic and cheap tune-ups. Thanks, Sweeper World!


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:23 AM
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lust in my heart for one of those Dyson Ball vacuums

Doesn't seem like an improvement on shaving them, really.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:30 AM
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33: We have a ten-year-old Hoover that we've never tuned-up. Does it really help? If so, where is this Sweeper World of which you speak. I was thinking we'd have to replace it soon because it wasn't sucking like it used to.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:33 AM
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31: For what it's worth, I've never heard of a Dyson either.

but 32 holds.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:56 AM
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37

It's how Freeman is paying for his retirement.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:00 AM
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My BF's parents have a central vacuum in their basement. You plug tubes into holes on each floor.

Wait, what? I've never heard of this! Do the tubes also deliver pneumatic mail?


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:01 AM
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38: I had a friend with that type of vacuum also. The problem is that you don't get the rotating brush (or at least you didn't in 1988), so it doesn't work as well for carpets. Also, you have to have a very long vacuum tube as there are only so many outlets.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:04 AM
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My BF's parents have a central vacuum in their basement. You plug tubes into holes on each floor.

I've seen this before too, but I can't remember where. I always wondered what happens if they get jammed.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:05 AM
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It's how Freeman is paying for his retirement.

I thought he was paying for that with hush money for agreeing not to fire up Project Orion.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:07 AM
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I'm skeptical of bagless vacuum cleaners. I don't buy that you can effectively confine dust using centrifugal force*. Plus my only experience with them involved sucking up a bunch of dust and then having it blow everywhere when I emptied the damn thing.

*Yeah, I fucking said it. You want a fight? Bring it on, you non-inertial reference frame hating bigot! We'll spin you right round, baby! Like a record baby! right round round round! Motherfuckers.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:07 AM
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40: I'm sure apo has some links to stories about things getting jammed in vacuums.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:08 AM
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Three days, no cigarette. Hence belligerence. You guys get it so I don't kill my cow-orkers. Motherfuckers.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:08 AM
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45

Congrats, togolosh!


Posted by: Will | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:10 AM
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37: That was his original plan.

But now it turns out that nobody watches TV anymore so all that money he spent on commercials was wasted. So he was forced to sign up as shill for the oil companies, and do interviews denying the existence of the greenhouse effect.

(just a joke! don't sue me, Freeman! I'm broke, anyway)


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:10 AM
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44: I've been on the patch more or less continuously since 2004. It has worked for me, just not very quickly.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:11 AM
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Bring it on, you non-inertial reference frame hating bigot!

That should be "intertial reference frame ...", toglosh. HTH. HAND.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:11 AM
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Awesome, togolosh! Believe it or not, you are almost past the hardest part!


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:12 AM
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I've been on the patch more or less continuously since 2004

I've heard you can wean yourself off the patch with only a few cigarettes a day...


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:12 AM
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Also, all joking aside: toglosh, that's great. The first few days are rough, but it does get better.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:13 AM
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52

||

Disquieting research result: if zombies attack, we're f*cked.

|>


Posted by: pain perdu | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:14 AM
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Rather than getting the lower dose patches, I'm now cutting the 21mg patches in half. They all cost pretty much the same, so I'm saving a dollar a day. Suck it recession.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:14 AM
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48: I don't think there's such a word as "intertial".


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:17 AM
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52: and did you see that one of the researchers is called Robert Smith?? That is, his surname is "Smith?". Not "Smith". Presumably the "?" is silent.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:20 AM
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52: I thought zombies were more into brain-eating than intercourse?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:20 AM
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but there should be


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:22 AM
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55: Maybe he's related to ?uestlove?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:22 AM
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My grandparents also have a central vacuuming system. It only works so-so. Good luck with it, togolosh. I've been off cigarettes since January (I've bummed the odd one here and there during that time, mostly while on vacation, but no real relapses). While it does get easier, I still do miss them. Especially when I'm driving.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:22 AM
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What I really miss, much more that cigarettes, is snuff (Copenhagen). If only being toothless wasn't such a negative social status signal.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:24 AM
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45, 49, 59: Thanks. I know I can quit, as I've done it before. This time I decided to minimize use of the patch and gum and just go for it. Working OK so far.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:24 AM
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What I really miss, much more that cigarettes, is snuff (Copenhagen)

I've heard someone say from personal experience that he found it easier to quit heroin than Skoal.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:27 AM
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Skoal is for people who want their nicotine to taste like candy.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:28 AM
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48: How Does Intertial Works? Still needs an answer.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:28 AM
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62: Yeah, heroin isn't sold in most corner stores.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:28 AM
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For some reason, snuff was illegal in England but legal in Scotland. At least when I was there in the early 1990s. I didn't check in Wales.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:30 AM
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62: The thing about that is that coming off heroin and similar makes you wish you were dead for a few days, but after a while you do just pretty much shake it off. Nicotine addiction is a more psychologically drawn out process, and often (see 59.last) so integrated into daily life you keep bumping up against it.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:31 AM
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Yeah, heroin isn't sold in most corner stores.

Right, more likely on the corner outside the store.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:31 AM
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62: my guess is he'd used a fair amount more Skoal than heroin. Or at least that's been my experience with people making similar claims. It's no surprise that it's hardest to quit the thing to which you're most addicted, but this shouldn't be taken as evidence that the one substance is necessarily "more addictive" than the other.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:32 AM
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and often (see 59.last) so integrated into daily life you keep bumping up against it.

BE CAREFUL!!!


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:33 AM
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Snuff isn't illegal here. At college high table dinners one of the junior fellows brings it round in a silver box.*

I think it's the Skoal 'bandits' that were made illegal.

* tragically, that is not a joke.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:36 AM
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one of those Dyson Ball vacuums.

What a missed opportunity to sell Dyson Spheres.


Posted by: Populuxe | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:37 AM
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The Americans stick snuff inside their lower lips and drool, rather than inhaling it in the true Ox/ford manner, ttaM.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:37 AM
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I know I can quit, as I've done it before.

Heh. Yeah, I'm getting really good at quitting, too -- I do it all the time.


Posted by: Di Kotimy | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:38 AM
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re: 73

I'll bet they don't even have proper tweed and calve's leather bibs.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:38 AM
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Tragically I didn't think it was.

There was a snuff factory in suburban Sheffield until about 30 years ago. Just a surprising thing to see.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:38 AM
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71: I meant snuff in the 'pinch between your cheek and gums' sense, not the snort-up your nose like it's low-rent cocaine. I don't know about now, but when I was there it was illegal to buy (but not possess) all types of Skoal and related products (snus). The bandits are a relatively new thing, maybe 20 years old or less.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:38 AM
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71: By "snuff" do you mean the stuff one snorts up one's nose? Or the stuff one tucks between one's cheek and gum and sort of sucks on?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:39 AM
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re: 78

The up the nose stuff.

re: 77

Skoal bandits were a brief craze here in the very early 80s.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:40 AM
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79: I didn't know they were that old. Maybe they didn't get to America until late.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:42 AM
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A lot of restaurants have centralized vacuum systems. Or I should say, the two I've worked in did.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:42 AM
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75: England still leads the world in the provision of high-quality artisanal dribbling infrastructure, ttaM.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:43 AM
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What a missed opportunity to sell Dyson Spheres.

Some lawyer probably informed them they couldn't trademark it.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:43 AM
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83: To which they replied "that sucks!".


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:44 AM
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"Chewing tobacco" seems to have been renamed "snuff" in the US at some point in the last five years. I guess with actual snuff no longer existing, the word shouldn't go to waste.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:45 AM
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re: 82

Damn straight. Generations of Lincolnshire artisans working in small thatched workshops, the soft setting sun glinting on the kyne lowing gently in the fields as the horse drawn wagon bears off the latest Duckworth's Patent Neck-ledge.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:46 AM
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Yep. Every time I quit successfully it lowers the bar to starting again. Just for tonight, that is. I mean this weekend. This week, I mean.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:46 AM
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85: Down here in some colleges I've seen signs outside lecture halls specifically prohibiting chew. Seems to be pretty regional.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:47 AM
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One time, this was in Durham, N.C., I asked for snuff and got up-the-nose snuff. I have no idea why because every other time I've asked for snuff, and this goes back 25 years, I've gotten the small round cans with tobacco that you put between your cheek and gum. In my experience, 'chewing tobacco' can mean snuff, but it usually means the giant leafy orally-delivered tobacco that has 'western' names.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:49 AM
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90

87 to 74


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:50 AM
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Up-the-nose snuff is kinda nice, though I never see it anymore.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:51 AM
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My swim coach in college was a huge user of snuff*. I tried some (clearly too much) at practice one day and found it to be one of the quickest and most unpleasant "highs" I have ever experienced. Lightweight = me.

* The cheek kind, called 'snuff' even back in the early '70s. He said he picked up the habit as a participant in Modern Pentathlon where it was viewed as a way to get a nicotine fix to calm nerves for the shooting without the negative effects on the lungs.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:53 AM
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91: Eight years ago, you could get it at a corner store near Brightleaf Square. I'm thinking it was off Gregson, but maybe not.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:56 AM
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OTOH, decorative snuff boxes are a great way to carry prescription drugs around when you're out.


Posted by: OFE | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:57 AM
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94: I love those old-timey pill boxes that ladies of yore carried aspirin around in.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:00 AM
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Aspirin. Yeah, right. I suspect that there were all sorts of goodies in those pill boxes which would now count as serious Class A.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:15 AM
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I like going to the vacuum cleaner shop, because ours has a museum.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:29 AM
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There's a tobacco store on the High Street in Oxford that sells dozens of varieties of snuff. In a very studenty way, I went through a phase of snuff-taking when I was there, untill I realised that it wasn't worth having brown shit coming out of my nose all the next day.

What a missed opportunity to sell Dyson Spheres.

If you think emptying a Dyson is messy, try emptying a Dyson Sphere. Where do you think all that interstellar dust comes from?


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:39 AM
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"I realised that it wasn't worth having brown shit coming out of my nose all the next day."

If you get a sinus infection, the brown could be a nice contrast to the green.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:40 AM
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Down here in some colleges I've seen signs outside lecture halls specifically prohibiting chew. Seems to be pretty regional.

Indeed, boy was it gross when a student up-ended his dip-cup all over the place during a final exam last year.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:54 AM
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31: Oh, you're just showing off now. You don't own a TV, right? Or you own a TV, but it's been years since you watched a show with commercials?

We own a TV and I love watching it? Maybe I just don't have a head for commercials.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:03 AM
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100: Down here in some colleges I've seen signs outside lecture halls specifically prohibiting chew. Seems to be pretty regional. Indeed, boy was it gross when a student up-ended his dip-cup all over the place during a final exam last year. s/b "Flowbee!"


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:03 AM
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I've seen signs outside lecture halls specifically prohibiting chew

A law outlawing smokeless tobacco use on school property went into effect when I was in school. The unintended consequence of that was that many of my classmates developed the capacity to swallow the tobacco spit.


Posted by: KR | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:04 AM
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I'm skeptical of bagless vacuum cleaners. I don't buy that you can effectively confine dust using centrifugal force*.

Wait, where is centrifugal force being used? It just sucks a lot, and then you dump out a plastic bucket at the end. It doesn't seem whirled.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:04 AM
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103: I learned how to do that in high school.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:05 AM
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102: s/b "Boy was it gross when a student up-ended his dip-cup while using a Flowbee"? That's not really what happened.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:06 AM
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102: Oh, I get it. Like Kobe!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:07 AM
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108

My BF's parents have a central vacuum in their basement. You plug tubes into holes on each floor.


Wait, what? I've never heard of this!

I actually have a potential client who wants to do this in their new house.

There's a gorgeous house near here by a significant local architect (sort of Pgh's answer to Charles Rennie Mackintosh) that has a primitive house vacuum - there's a water tank in the attic, and when you let the water out, it creates suction in the pipes that go to each room. Reputedly not actually that effective.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:07 AM
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109

We have a ten-year-old Hoover that we've never tuned-up. Does it really help? If so, where is this Sweeper World of which you speak.

Right by Tessaro's. Cheap, and it makes a world of difference. So great.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:08 AM
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108.last: Because having a guy working a bellows would be too Fred Flintsone?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:12 AM
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I still do miss them. Especially when I'm driving

Before my mom's accident, she was cutting down. One of her methods was not smoking in her new sporty car. She said the morning drive to the golf course was the hardest one of the day to skip.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:12 AM
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112

I grew up hearing the in-the-cheek kind referred to only as "dip" and with relatives who did the up-the-nose sort of snuff, referred to as "snuff."

Next weekend is the 18 month mark for me without a single cigarette the entire time. My plan is to get a pipe when I turn 40 and start smoking again the day I retire. By then they'll either have fixed cigarettes somehow, figured out how to grow me new lungs or I'll be so old it just won't matter. I still find it difficult to watch movies or read books that feature a lot of smoking but I have found that saying aloud that I would like a cigarette causes me to be able to get over it.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:13 AM
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There's a gorgeous house near here by a significant local architect (sort of Pgh's answer to Charles Rennie Mackintosh) that has a primitive house vacuum - there's a water tank in the attic, and when you let the water out, it creates suction in the pipes that go to each room.

We call that an aspirator in the lab.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:14 AM
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I still do miss them. Especially when I'm driving

Have you tried texting?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:14 AM
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Also, every time I read "HEPA" my memory produces a line of audio from Twin Peaks: "HEPA... I want to cook with you, HEPA."


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:21 AM
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Chew works just as well as the up-the-nose kind used rectally. Maybe even better.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:23 AM
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107: No flies on you.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:24 AM
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Fruit flies on a banana.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:24 AM
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116: Have you tried cigarettes?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:24 AM
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A little pinch between your cheek and cheek.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:24 AM
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120->116.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:24 AM
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120: Just try to be a little more gentle. Last time you pinched me down there it left a welt.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:26 AM
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Have you tried cigarettes?

Where do you put the butts?


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:27 AM
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Where do you put the butts?

Have you tried ashtrays?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:28 AM
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No more masturbating to Robert Novak.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:29 AM
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Have you tried ashtrays?

I can't find one with a flared base.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:29 AM
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108: In high school a friend's house had a central vacuum system, but her dad was an architect and he designed their house. I wonder how common it is in less bespoke houses.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:30 AM
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123: a joke too good for just a blog comment.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:30 AM
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I can't find one with a flared base.

Just pinch it between your cheeks.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:31 AM
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125: Wow. Imagine the welcome banner they've hung up in Hell.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:31 AM
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125: I see the devil came to collect his debt.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:31 AM
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here you go, apo.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:32 AM
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126: I'll bet you couldn't tell one with a flared base from a hole in the ground.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:32 AM
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125: Robert Novak hadn't long since cast himself upon Ronald Reagan's funeral pyre?


Posted by: Flippanter | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:32 AM
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125: I've never been happier not to be masturbating.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:32 AM
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Imagine the welcome banner they've hung up in Hell.

But he's still gonna be mighty pissed when he sees that the bigger room with the nicer view is marked "reserved for Bill Kristol".


Posted by: pain perdu | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:33 AM
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It's surprisingly hard to google a picture of somebody with a cigarette stuck in their butthole.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:33 AM
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137: Sometimes you just have to do something yourself.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:36 AM
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138: It hardly seems worth creating my own search engine.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:37 AM
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It's surprisingly hard to google a picture of somebody with a cigarette stuck in their butthole.

...but it pays off in the amusement it provides to sysadmins snooping on your server logs.


Posted by: pain perdu | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:48 AM
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I was going to make a joke asking whether he dived into an empty pool again, but then I remembered that was Krauthammer. Alas.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:49 AM
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136: Nice.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:51 AM
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Didn't Novak get busted a year or so ago for ramming his sporty little overcompensator into a bicyclist and then trying to flee the scene?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:55 AM
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He hit a pedestrian with his Corvette and claimed he didn't notice. Wikipedia says this claim is what led to the tests that revealed his brain tumor, as hitting something and not noticing it is an early indicator of brain cancer. That this happens enough for someone to make the connection is, itself, fairly terrifying.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:03 AM
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Watching people hit things and not notice it and not making the connection to brain cancer is a sign of brain cancer.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:09 AM
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I'm a sign of brain cancer.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:10 AM
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146: What the hell kind of crazy zodiac shit is that?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:17 AM
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147: Heebgeettarius?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:18 AM
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Say, he hit it and quit it!


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:18 AM
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I'm a brain virgo.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:18 AM
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The etymological link between the astrological sign and the Novak-killer is pretty fascinating, really.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:20 AM
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137: It's surprisingly hard to google a picture of somebody with a cigarette stuck in their butthole.

Yes, failing at that so far, but for some reason am coming up with a few ads from back in the day that remind what a different world of smoking it was. Santa. Doc. It's a Psychological Fact. Mom. The Creepy Guy in the Bar. Athletes. Uncle Ronnie.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:21 AM
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150: You have a pristing mind, and nothing has ever entered it?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:21 AM
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153: Why you dirty man, he's never pristed!


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:22 AM
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The Creepy Guy in the Bar.

"Blow in her face and she'll follow you anywhere." Wow.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:22 AM
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What, you don't know what the verb "prist" means? Hicks.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:23 AM
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It was on the secret syllabus at my school.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:24 AM
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156: what does the verb "hicks" mean, though?


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:25 AM
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158: It's a non-Brahmin thing. You wouldn't understand.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:26 AM
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The masturbation-fodder supply of South Korean ex-presidents is dwindling alarmingly rapidly.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:49 AM
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104: I'm thinking about the bagless cyclonic type. I'm even more skeptical of the non cyclonic type, but maybe I'm just grumpy because the onion fell off my belt.

My experience with bagless vacuums is that emptying the not-bag leads to great clouds of dust, so the best bet is to go several tens of feet out into the yard and dump it there. Or just buy a new vacuum cleaner when the old one is full.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:52 AM
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I'm thinking Richard Perle should be celebratinng Robert Novak's death.

Now he is the uncontested "Prince of Darkness".


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:00 PM
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I have a gadget-minded friend at work who is making his own Roomba lawn mower* , but I have trouble getting past "unattended", "outside" and "whirling cutting blades". He loves working on it though; in the '30s he'd be the type building on his own personal gyrocopter.

*Yes, he knows that they already exist.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:03 PM
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161: My onion is firmly fixed in place, but I have always had the same problem with bagless vacuum cleaners. It isn't like vacuum bags are expensive. I don't see how 'bagless' is a selling point.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:05 PM
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163: Depending on the state, I'm sure I can find somebody to represent any toeless children in the neighborhood.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:06 PM
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What Moby and togolosh said. Wandering out into the yard to empty the cannister? And I've got to keep washing the damn filter? Screw that.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:07 PM
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I don't see how 'bagless' is a selling point.

Zackly. Bags aren't just receptacles, they're filters. Who wants the apparatus itself to be filled with dust and pet hair?


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:09 PM
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165: Maybe they would become the next John Edwards.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:23 PM
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There was a law student I knew who used to chew tobacco a lot (I guess it was snuff, there was another s name in highschool too.) He had a water bottle on his desk that he'd spit into. Law school exams were supposed to be anonymous, but his always had a tobacco juice stain or two on them.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:28 PM
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Rereading the thread, McManly reminded me that in high school people called it dip.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:28 PM
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169: Usually, people try to avoid spitting into vessels with clear sides. Ugh.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:31 PM
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It isn't like vacuum bags are expensive. I don't see how 'bagless' is a selling point.

For me, it's because of the moment when I need to vacuum and realize that the bag's full and I'm out of bags, and there's noplace nearby that sells the right ones.

(I also think about the ease of retrieving something small that accidentally got vacuumed up, but I've never actually done this.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:34 PM
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172: It's like trash bags. There's "full" and there's "I was out of options full."

And I have had to retrieve small items from the bag. Just cut it open. It's still neater than the alternatives.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:37 PM
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Again, for me, "buying bags" goes on the to do list, and never actually gets done, so I'm always running into "out of options full". This thread is making me want a Dyson.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:56 PM
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155: Hover text.

Personally, I prefer bagless because I hate the idea of having to remember to buy bags. I guarantee I would not remember to do so and would face constant frustration. That said, our bagless Dirt Devil bought five years ago is officially worse than not vacuuming at this point. If I vacuum with it, it smells like burning rubber and there is, somehow, more on the floor than there was when I started. I am going to have to buy a new vacuum. It will be bagless. A filter I could rinse would be awesome.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:56 PM
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Never would I buy a Dyson. Maybe they're great, I dunno, and I never will. I cannot fathom paying that much for a vacuum cleaner.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:57 PM
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175: For a filter you can rinse, you want a shop vac. They make small ones now. Plus you can vacuum water.

(I may be less worried about buying bags because there is a grocery store about 3 blocks from my house.)


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 12:58 PM
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169: Snus. Now a brand name as well.


Posted by: minneapolitan | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:02 PM
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Plus you can vacuum water.

In case it gets dusty.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:03 PM
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179: Apparently you've never had a water heater die in your basement.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:05 PM
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180:

Apartment dweller says: Not my problem.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:07 PM
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Bagless isn't a huge selling point. But it's fun to see how much dirt you picked up. And dumping it in the trash can didn't generate a big dust storm. Or any dust storm.

Also, the argument about how you don't want dust inside the vacuum cleaner doesn't make much sense to me. Tube -> disposable bag or tube -> plastic cannister? Plus, I'm totally saving the environment.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:08 PM
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"Plus, I'm totally saving the environment."

I rode the bus to work today. That's my offset.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:08 PM
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Bagless isn't a huge selling point. But it's fun to see how much dirt you picked up. And dumping it in the trash can didn't generate a big dust storm. Or any dust storm.

Also, the argument about how you don't want dust inside the vacuum cleaner doesn't make much sense to me. Tube -> disposable bag or tube -> plastic cannister? Plus, I'm totally saving the environment.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:10 PM
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Plus, I'm totally saving the environment.

And bandwidth.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:18 PM
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heebie's bandwidth is 8 miles wide.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:19 PM
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LB is correct that remembering to buy VC bags is a PITA. I prefer to just leave things dirty until I'm driven to make a trip to the store, but I understand that's not an option for everyone.

Plus, I'm totally saving the environment.

Until you pissed away all those electrons on the double post, that is. Don't you know there are kids in India with barely any electrons at all?


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:23 PM
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I'd send my extra electrons to those poor kids in India, but I don't have the bandwidth.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:24 PM
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When I had a vacuum cleaner that used bags, not only would I forget to buy bags, but on the occasions that I remembered I would not find the right kind of bag to fit the vacuum cleaner I was using, or I would get confused about which model I had and which bag was supposed to fit it. Bagless is much easier, and I don't see any downside.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:44 PM
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Apparently if you live in an area where the air is filled with sand and dust there is a downside to bagless vacuums.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 1:46 PM
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remembered I would not find the right kind of bag to fit the vacuum cleaner I was using, or I would get confused about which model I had and which bag was supposed to fit it.

Yup. It's like sponge mops, which I don't think I've ever successfully bought refills for -- whatever I buy, whether or not it's the same brand as the mop, doesn't fit. I hate them.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:05 PM
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189,191: I see an opportunity here for an online company that remembers what kind of mop, vacuum cleaner, razor, coffee filter, etc. you need and delivers them at the press of a button. "RefillReminder.com" or something like that.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:09 PM
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I think with the sponge mops, it's deliberate -- the mop looks cheap because it's ten bucks once, and then two every couple of months afterward when you replace the head. Because the heads are irreplaceable, it's ten bucks, then six for a threepack of replacements that don't fit, and then ten again for a new mop, every three months.

I avoid this cycle by not mopping -- when the floor gets sticky enough (um, yearly?) I wash it with rags.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:13 PM
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193: That'll show Big Mop!


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:16 PM
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I use baby wipes in the high traffic areas. They are so good at getting stuff off the floor, I'm starting to wonder how than can be safe for baby-ass.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:18 PM
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Indeed. I have bitter feelings toward Big Mop.

(This isn't just me, right? When I say this to people in person, they confirm that they, too, are unable to successfully replace spongemop heads. And the lurkers email me about it constantly.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:18 PM
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Apparently if you live in an area where the air is filled with sand and dust there is a downside to bagless vacuums.

Yeah, it's impossible to find a Dyson repair shop on Mars.


Posted by: Ginger Yellow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:20 PM
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I don't mop that often, but when I do I don't use a sponge mop, so I don't really know. String/cloth strip mops are the way to go.

195: Isn't swiffer just baby wipes on a stick?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:21 PM
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Mars ain't the kind of place to raise a mop.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:22 PM
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Isn't swiffer just baby wipes on a stick?

They're perfect for people who wouldn't change a diaper without a ten foot pole.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:23 PM
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Mop compatibility problem confirmed. Exacerbated by two incompatible swiffer modalities.

Also the shitty little batteries in led lights, calculators, anything small. I can't wait to be farsighted and trying to figure out hearing aid batteries.

DVD+RW and DVD-RW, whose bright idea? And don't get me started on library incompatibilities from "different" compiler versions.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:23 PM
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Since this is the cleaning thread, does anyone know how to get old dried-on soy sauce off a wall? It's complicated by the fact that the quality of the paint isn't the highest, so I need to be no more aggressive than absolutely necessary.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:28 PM
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Put a condom on your tongue before you lick it off.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:30 PM
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Try those melamine foam magic sponges. I love those things.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:30 PM
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Soy sauce? I'd think a damp paper towel should do it, maybe with some dish soap. If that's not working, there's always getting a Magic Eraser, but I'd expect a damp, soapy paper towel/cloth/sponge to do the trick.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:30 PM
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Possibly passive-aggresive.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:31 PM
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"Oh no, that's fine. I love having old soy sauce on my wall. No problem. You just hang out there. No, no, it's not because the paint's too cheap to clean you off without messing up the wall and costing me money. Really. Yeah, great."


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:32 PM
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202: When I quit smoking, I got lots of food on my walls also. Irritability and clumsiness both increase.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:32 PM
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208: same thing happened to me when I gave up swallowing.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:33 PM
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Magic erasers are really the best thing ever. Like, you think we have all the technology we could ever need and there is no room left to revolutionize daily tasks, and yet.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:34 PM
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I have bitter feelings toward Big Mop.

You have no idea.


Posted by: Abner Louima | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:35 PM
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201: This is more obscure than mop heads, but if you work with plants much, there are, literally, several hundred different types of 4" plastic pots (this type of thing), each with slightly different dimensions and angle of slope on the sides, so that no two different types nest well with each other.

Plus, each type has to have its own type of tray (this kind of thing) or it won't fit very well into the slots.

At the nonprofit I spend way too much time with, we grow a lot of our own starter plants for our gardeners, and we use and reuse pots donated from nurseries and random people, and sorting the things so that you get a full tray of pots that don't fall out easily or crowd each other or overshade each other is a f&*king pain in the ass.

I hate Big Small Plastic Pot.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:36 PM
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I pot my plants in ramekins.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:37 PM
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I put mine on trivets.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:38 PM
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175: If I vacuum with it, it smells like burning rubber and there is, somehow, more on the floor than there was when I started. I am going to have to buy a new vacuum.

1) You have an internal clog.
2) Your roller is damaged and/or wrapped in hair and/or the belt is elderly. The burning rubber smell is the belt. (Or should be; it's faintly possible the suction motion has an issue.)

Nothing to do with it being bagless though.

193: I avoid this cycle by not mopping -- when the floor gets sticky enough (um, yearly?) I wash it with rags.

Never had much luck with mopping, if I wanted the floor actually clean. Sweeping and then breaking out a pot of hot water, some spray-on chlorox and sponge worked way faster and way better.

max
['I think the people they show mopping on commercials start with clean floors. Mopping as masturbation.']


Posted by: max | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:38 PM
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I admire everyone's restraint.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:39 PM
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216 to 209?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:40 PM
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216: Restraint about mopping?


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:40 PM
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Our kitchen floor and counters are this mottled granite stuff, and it is absolutely magical about hiding the need to mop or clean. It will look sparking clean, but if you were to run a damp paper towel in front of where we make coffee and it will be dark brown with general grime.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:41 PM
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219: we have a dirt floor in the kitchen for the same reason.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:42 PM
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I pot my plants in ramekins.

But do you plant your pot in ramekins?


Posted by: pain perdu | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:43 PM
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220: You just need to mop a little harder, Sifu. There's tile down under there.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:43 PM
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222: uh huh. That's what those guys on Mars said, too. Can't fool me twice.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:44 PM
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general grime

I'm imagining General Grime as a uniformed cartoon villain. Maybe with his underlings Corporal Clutter and Major Mess.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:46 PM
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224: Sargeant Shithole.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:49 PM
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224: Don't forget Private Shame and Lieutenant Leftthemilkoutagain (played by a British actor).


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:50 PM
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224: General Grime's Chicken is inexplicably less popular than General Tso's.


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:51 PM
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Lieutenant Leftthemilkoutagain (played by a British actor).

Pronounced "Leftenant Logan", of course.


Posted by: Gabardine Bathyscaphe | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:51 PM
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Lieutenant Left-Tenant, your dastardly neighbor who plays loud music at all hours.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:52 PM
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228: Exactly!


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 2:54 PM
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230: I thought it was pronounced "Freddy Mercury".


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:11 PM
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231: Racist.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:19 PM
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JP's link to docs selling cigarettes reveals that, as I suspected, Don Draper's brilliant use of "It's toasted" after the gov't said no more health-claiming ads was bunk. They already used it.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:27 PM
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233: Being relatively innocent of Mad Men (and many other things), I knew not of what I revealed. However, it was already sitting out there in The Hitchhik Wikipedia.

In 1917, the brand started using the slogan "It's Toasted" to inform consumers about the manufacturing method in which the tobacco is toasted rather than sun-dried, a process touted as making the cigarette more delicious. The message "L.S.M.F.T." ("Lucky Strike means fine tobacco") was introduced on the package in the same year.

Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:42 PM
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Why I need an industrial strength cat vacuum:

I washed a cashmere sweater and laid it out to dry on a rack. Oh, says my climbing cat, something else to scale! And a nice, soft, albeit damp, thing to lie upon and leave my hair allllll over.

How many disposable razors will it take to shave a cat?


Posted by: DominEditrix | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:46 PM
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235.3: Disposable presumably because like me you have an awesome collection of mismatched razor blades and razors in your bathroom cabinet.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 3:49 PM
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LB, You need a microfiber mop. I got one as a gift, and I do need to buy some replacement pads. The thing is that you can't go too far wrong, because it's basically an awesome rag velcroed to a mophead.

Clean Floor Store

Simplee Clean


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 4:09 PM
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an awesome collection of mismatched razor blades and razors in your bathroom cabinet.

Seriously. I refuse to buy the 3, 4, or 5-blade razors, but it's increasingly hard to find the 2-blade kind, so I keep growing this collection of different varieties of 2-blade razors and accompanying razor blades depending on what I manage to find in stock at the store.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 4:28 PM
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192: drugstore.com used to do that, send you refills on schedule. Probably still do.

I also am an unsuccessful mopper. Do the microfiber mops self-squeeze? because getting the dirty water out is what I end up on my knees by the bucket to do.


Posted by: clew | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:13 PM
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You could get a safety razor, essear.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:32 PM
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238: Target used to sell a store brand that fit Atra. I think Gillette paid them off the way HP bribed the generic ink cartridge makers.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:46 PM
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You could get a safety straight razor, essear.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:50 PM
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242: I was wondering about that.

Can you use straight razors on your legs?


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:51 PM
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214: where ever we go we bring our potted plants with us


Posted by: Turgid Jacobian | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:55 PM
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Brass potted plants! Those funky potted plants!


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 6:59 PM
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243: I'm sure you can.


Posted by: parsimon | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:00 PM
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242: I assume that's what neb meant. I'm clumsy and cut myself often enough with the "safe" kind, though.

241: I have some that I picked up at the grocery store that claim to fit both Atra and Trac II and yet fit neither. I wonder what they do fit.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:00 PM
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247: locking forceps.


Posted by: Turgid Jacobian | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:04 PM
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241: Yeah, I'd rail against Big Razor, but that would sound as though I had some problem with rude boys circa-1964. And I don't.


Posted by: minneapolitan | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:16 PM
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246: Hm, I'm trying to decide if using them would be economical or just lead to an early and embarrassing death.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:21 PM
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1) You have an internal clog.

Maybe YOU have an internal clog!


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:38 PM
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I assume that's what neb meant

No, I meant safety razors. They have the following advantage over straight razors: they are safe. Also they are easy to use regardless of chirality.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:43 PM
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But, uh ... isn't that what he's using already? I'm so confused.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:46 PM
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252: I assumed it was clear from the above that while I refuse to buy many-bladed monstrosities, I use safety razors of the sort that take cartridges with two blades.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:50 PM
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I assume neb means the kind that you put an actual razor blade, not a disposable cartridge, into.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:54 PM
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I think neb was speaking of this general type of safety razor.


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:54 PM
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Hi!


Posted by: redfoxtailshrub | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:54 PM
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These, when I can find them. It hadn't occurred to me that Amazon could be an option for this sort of thing.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 7:55 PM
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255, 256: Ah, I see. Maybe I should consider that.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:05 PM
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256: That's the "safety razor" I used as a beginner long ago. I still have scars from it. One thing I figured out is that it helps to pop the zits first. (This was when benzoyl peroxide was prescription-only and hard to get, but "diet pills" and Quaaludes were easy and common.) I was so happy when disposable razors came out. Now I sometimes daydream of using a "cut-throat" razor like in the old Westerns -- has anybody hear tried that? I read some peoples used to tweeze their beards off; I tried that, but after 45 minutes or so I gave up and shaved.


Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:11 PM
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I've never tried a straight razor, and they kind of creep me out, but I want one. Specifically, this one.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:21 PM
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I have never heard someone use the term "safety razor" to mean the modern disposable-cartridge kind of razor, rather than the comparatively less modern disposable-razor kind of razor.

My father used safety razors, presumably during his flâneur period.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:31 PM
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EVER!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:32 PM
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I've lived in a couple of places with those old mirrored metal medicine cabinets that have slots for blade disposal. Who the hell came up with that idea? The blades just go into the wall space, when they should go into recycling.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:38 PM
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It's handy for those who want to build up collections of used razors.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:41 PM
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265: But nosflow, one has to bust a hole in the wall to get to those. It's much easier to save them in, say, an empty jar. Then when Halloween comes...


Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:51 PM
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Jesus, $1,350 for a razor? If I were going to spend serious money on my facial hair I'd get it lasered off forever.


Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 8:56 PM
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267: Jesus is talking about spending serious money on a razor, not on your facial hair. Who would pay money for your facial hair? Does it contain fossilized mammoth ivory? Or hand-forged Damascus steel? I don't think so.


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:06 PM
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Who the hell came up with that idea? The blades just go into the wall space, when they should go into recycling.

I don't think they had recycling in 1947. Also, sharp things in a thin plastic bag leads to trouble.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:09 PM
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has anybody hear tried that?

For about ten years, yes. They work well.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:10 PM
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I should add that I don't currently use one. Being in academia, I mostly don't bother these days.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:12 PM
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268: Read 267 again and your mistake should be obvious. If I can see it, anybody can.



Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:14 PM
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M/tch, you were in China?


Posted by: cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:15 PM
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264: And all those needles at the hospital. Just one stick and then into a red plastic bin.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:18 PM
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M/tch, you're made of china?


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:18 PM
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You know, that razor would pay for itself in about 20 years. I'd be a fool not to buy it.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:19 PM
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271: Ain't tenure wonderful?

There's no especially real reason why I should care how I look either, but I still try to look at least basically presentable around 2 or 3 days each week. Too bad for the rest of the world those days are seldom sequential.

276: Jesus, you're very young, aren't you.



Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:21 PM
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Did you factor in strop replacement?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:22 PM
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276: By then, razors will be sentient. And rich!


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:23 PM
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I don't see M/tch's mistake. Can you clarify?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:23 PM
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Why would it be better for the rest of the world if you looked presentable two or three days in a row?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:24 PM
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277.3: On the internet, no one knows you mourn your misspent youth.

278: I did! If I shaved more often, I could bring the payback period down to ten years, maybe less. Damascus steel, man!


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:26 PM
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Christ, in 20 years we're all going to end up working for the razors, aren't we?


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:39 PM
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They're going to liberate themselves at some point. The important thing is not to let them organize, or learn to read.


Posted by: A White Bear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:40 PM
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The important thing is not to let them organize

We must outlaw drums and only allow them to travel about with passes.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:42 PM
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Should I do this? I would have to purchase or borrow some equipment (most notably a tent and an air mattress).


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:43 PM
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REI rents tents. Ours was very nice. Don't know about the air mattresses.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:46 PM
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Dear nosflow, why not just email me a death threat?

But then, hey, back in 8th grade this girl named Helen used to pick on me all the time. It got so I'd flinch and duck at the thought of her. Then after my 14th birthday party she got my virginity: it turned out she paid so much particular attention to me because she wanted me BAD.

Poor nosflow. I've wised up a lot in 32 years.


Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:50 PM
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Sounds like fun, neb, but, uh...you don't want to carry an air mattress that far. Unless you mean one of those little Thermarests.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:51 PM
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Oh, never mind, I just read the fine print. In which case, go for it! I've done parts of that trail and it's always been enjoyable.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:54 PM
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(a) yeah, one of those little things. You know what I'm talking about. They roll up.
(b) they move the equipment from camp to camp!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:54 PM
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Oh, shit, you mean you aren't still a virgin? Nevermind, then.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:55 PM
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() is right. I find air mattresses less comfortable than the standard-issue foam pad, anyway.

There's a Zowada razor on eBay right now at $300 with 21 hours to go, but it has wood scales. Fuck that. It's mammoth or nothing.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:55 PM
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(b) they move the equipment from camp to camp!

That's cheating. Get yourself a proper backpack.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:55 PM
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I always wanted to take on of those cycling vacations where the put your stuff in a van so you don't have to carry it.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:57 PM
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For a moment I thought 292 was directed at me and I was very hurt.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:58 PM
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296: I'd be gentle. If that's what you want.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 9:59 PM
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I've always wanted to experience nature while being toted about on a palanquin.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:00 PM
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I see that "air mattress" refers to something other than what I meant to refer to. I wonder what the correct term is!


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:01 PM
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Jesus, I'd get motion sickness. I'd want my bearers to stand perfectly still.


Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:01 PM
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297: Well, I just didn't understand how my sexual experience or lack thereof affected my opinions on camping, you see.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:01 PM
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"sleeping pad", apparently.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:01 PM
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298: On the back of an elephant, on a bed made of linen and sequins and silk? (Damnit, now I'm going to have that Decemberists song stuck in my head, and it's going to keep evoking that bit of Mad Men that uses it.)


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:02 PM
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301: My snoring scares bears and coyotes but attracts racoons.


Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:03 PM
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One summer in Hyde Park I slept on an air mattress after some sort of confusion about whether the apartment I was renting would be furnished or not. Ah, youth.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:04 PM
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(Damnit, now I'm going to have that Decemberists song stuck in my head, and it's going to keep evoking that bit of Mad Men that uses it.)

That was really disconcerting.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:04 PM
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301: My misunderstanding. I took "I've done parts of that trail and it's always been enjoyable" the wrong way.


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:05 PM
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307 was me.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:06 PM
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Hmm. That makes me disinclined to watch Mad Men. That and not having a teevee, of course.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:06 PM
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Who needs a tv when you have a computer? (I always said I'd never have a TV in my bedroom, but, uh, I realized that the computer is just as bad when it comes to encouraging watching DVDs in bed.)


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:10 PM
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"sleeping pad", apparently.

Ah, yes, these are important. You'll have an uncomfortable night's sleep without one. They make regular solid foam ones, and a sort of semi-inflatable kind that some people prefer. I like the solid ones, as they tend to be cheaper, quicker to set up, and last longer since they don't have a valve that can wear out, but tastes differ.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:11 PM
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Speaking of a night's sleep....


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:17 PM
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310: This is true, which is why my proud teevee non-ownership is disingenuous. I have in fact watched teevee programs recently (The Wire; Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman; and Nature's Great Events, for those of you keeping score at home).


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:19 PM
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I'm sleeping on the floor these days. At first it was because I couldn't decide what kind of bed to buy, but after two weeks I'm getting used to it.


Posted by: Entity | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:21 PM
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Jesus, are you familiar with the Blue Cranes?


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:23 PM
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I'm not. Should I be?


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:24 PM
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Yes. They're local to you, you know.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:25 PM
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Ah, now I see. Let me give them a listen.


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:25 PM
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Huh. Now I'm wondering how they've escaped my attention. I'm liking the clips on their site. Did you hear them when they were down your way last weekend?


Posted by: Jesus McQueen | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:41 PM
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I heard them then, and the last time they were down my way, and once I walked past a cafe where they were playing my favorite tune of theirs ("Polaris"), but I first heard them on CD, in late 2007.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:43 PM
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Get a room, you two.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 10:44 PM
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I guess they did. It's awfully quiet around here now. Just when I finished the work I should have been doing earlier this afternoon instead of reading old threads about letter closings.

I'm failing utterly at the "who's Googling me?" game this week. There's still a Lehman Brothers?


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:06 PM
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Indeed. I'm trying to do my keynote presentation for tomorrow's lecture and finding myself completely uninspired.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:09 PM
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It took me a moment to associate the word "keynote" with the software. I'm thinking, what is a keynote presentation for a lecture? I've heard of keynote speakers at conventions...

Inspiration sounds like a high bar to clear for a lecture. "Inspired" isn't a word that comes to mind when characterizing most of the classes I took in college.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:16 PM
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Well, really, I'm pushing for barely adequate at this point. But it's a long class and I would like to help retain my students interest with a well-done presentation, since unlike others I can't entirely rely on my magnetic delivery.


Posted by: Parenthetical | Link to this comment | 08-18-09 11:20 PM
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re: 238/240 etc

I use a safety razor, with the individual razor blades. I find them far superior to the multi-blade cartridge razors. I cut myself far less, and don't get a shaving rash like I get with multi-blade razors. Also, once you've bought the initial razor [which is only 20 quid anyway], much much cheaper.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 12:07 AM
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243 Can you use straight razors on your legs? They're great for scarring.


Posted by: Econolicious, busses picnic tables with a leaf blower | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 12:59 AM
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I shave with a Taser.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 1:00 AM
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"One man asks another, one man tells another". (I was looking for—but not finding—an old electric razor* commercial where one too many blades is stuck into the medicine cabinet slot and the building collapses.)

*I think. Or maybe it was for blades that claimed to last longer.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 1:01 AM
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I want receptacles that allow me to drop things into the walls of my house! No more taking out the recycling!

It reminds me, obscurely, of the mail slot at a building I worked in, which was sealed, had signs all over it that said "mail slot is non-operative", yet was still used by the lazy, lazy receptionist for outgoing mail. Not outgoing very far, as it turns out.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 1:11 AM
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Why "obscurely"? That's not "obscurely". That's "predictably". Geez, Sifu.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 1:22 AM
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Sifu the Predictable.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 1:27 AM
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Seriously. I probably follow a piece of tape on the floor like Omnibot.


Posted by: Sifu Tweety | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 1:28 AM
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But how do you get the tape to move?


Posted by: Turgid Jacobian | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 4:31 AM
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Straight razors are impractical because they won't let you bring them on airplanes. So you're stuck with checked bags, and all the accompanying bullshit.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 8:28 AM
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Fortunately, I don't have to fly often enough that it has any effect on my grooming habits. I have no intention of getting a straight razor, but that's because of my fear of cutting through my neck.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 8:32 AM
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Straight razors are impractical because they won't let you bring them on airplanes.

Also the case with the razor-blade kind of safety razor.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 9:45 AM
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Some microfiber mops self squeeze. One site said you could buy a tool for scraping off excess water. You can also pull off the cloth and ring it out. When you get too much dirt on one, you can switch it out for a fresh one, then wash them all in the machine.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 10:22 AM
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WRING


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 10:47 AM
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Aren't we all pretty much stuck with checked bags and the accompanying bullshit ::cough::extra charges::cough:: anyway, now that you can't carry on things like prescription meds or non-tiny bottles of shampoo or a manicure kit?


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 11:03 AM
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now that you can't carry on things like prescription meds or non-tiny bottles of shampoo or a manicure kit?

Aside from non-tiny bottles of shampoo, you're allowed to carry on all of that stuff.

The TSA page also seems to imply that you're allowed to bring safety razors in your carry-on, but it's a little unclear. It says the following items are banned:

Razor-Type Blades - such as box cutters, utility knives, razor blades not in a cartridge, but excluding safety razors.,/blockquote>I'm not sure whether they merely mean a safety razor is allowed only if it does not have a blade in it, or that you're in fact allowed to carry on a razor blade so long as it is loaded into a safety razor.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 12:50 PM
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Stupid formatting. The second sentence in the blockquote is mine.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 12:52 PM
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It sure looks as if it means that you should be able to carry in a razor blade in a safety razor.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 12:56 PM
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WRING

Hello?


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 08-19-09 5:08 PM
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344 is an example of what is often called "dry humour".


Posted by: M/tch M/lls | Link to this comment | 08-20-09 9:56 AM
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