Shoulderpads attract pot belly. It's a natural law. It's because of testosterone.
Mostly off topic movie review.
Just finished watching Water Lilies, a very slow subtle gentle French art movie about three young girl's friendships & sexual awakenings in a background of synchronized swimming. Hey, I gotta watch something. Very nice, mostly natural soundtrack without music. Is all that done by foley artists? Whatever. Recommended.
Anyway, the lead character is lesbian, with some explicit scenes(no nudity). But in the last scene, the very last frame, the actress breaks the "fourth wall" and stares directly at the camera. I don't know how, but you can tell she knows the camera is there.
And somehow that seems to break through all the objectification and any possible voyeurism.
Maggie Gyllenhall does the same thing at the end of Secretary, just announcing:"What you have been watching isn't me. You don't know me." and then instantly jumps back into character. Very nice.
"Avoid spilling red wine, because you don't want him to remember you for the wrong reasons."
This video reminds me of this, which I re-read every so often to feel grateful I was born late.
3: Yes, that got my attention. Do I just have an incredibly dirty mind, such that I spent a lot of time trying to figure out what possible "wrong reasons" red wine could be associated with? Or do I have a non-dirty mind, such that I failed to come up with even one?
From the title, I was expecting the video to have something to do with prostate exams. Having watched it, I see I was correct.
It's great that that clip ends with the caption "EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE".
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Can't see the video at work, but this looks like a perfect way to prevent seduction ever happening again.
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Astonishingly, this elixir costs a mere $3.99 (£2.65). By contrast, one of its competitors, Chanel No 5, for example, costs more than $80.
Snarky bastards.
"Research shows that 40% of men suffer from shyness." I hope those shyentologists were board-certified.
... and the other 60% were too nervous to respond.
I hope those shyentologists were board-certified.
I hope so too. But I have to say, they sound like rank amateurs to me. Surely a board-certified shyentologist would report that "Research shows that 40% of men suffer from social anxiety disorder."
Isn't Tom Cruishe a shyentologist?
I never knew Buffy's mum was such a font of dating wisdom.
Wasnt there recent article about how kids don't date, they simply hook up with friends?
I watched the entire video, and was still not clear at the end whether it was from a sketch comedy TV show or not. "Isn't that Dan Aykroyd? No...no it's not. Wait, yes it is."
Comedy sketch?! Don't tell me I went out and bought this interesting conversation piece of a necklace for nothing!
But the woman in the video achieved her success with that vibrant yet matronly scarf, not a necklace.
re: 17
Your attempt at trolling hasn't gone unnoticed...
Damn! I knew I should've bought the scarf! Now I'm going to die alone. And with unfortunate accessories, to boot.
22 - throw wine on random men. Don't forget to take it out of the bottle first, though.
21: Had he dressed it up with a nice scarf, he might have gotten somewhere.
Just spill some white wine on someone, Di.
Maybe if you sign all your correspondence
"Vibrant yet matronly,
Di Kotimy"
you would get more action.
Oh, wine! I had an "h" in there. Geez, I'm just no good at this stuff.
Don't believe Di's complaints.
Did you people hear about her and that married guy?
You are so yesterday's news, will. Apparently the updated office rumor is that I am expecting. I can't wait to find out who the dad is!
I told you to get the stripper DDs, not the voluptuous "is she pregnant?" C+ look.
2: Soundtrack was done by Para One, but Vitalic did the music for the trailer. I agree it's a very good film, but I'm embarrassed to say that I don't remember the ending. Is it after Marie is rejected and runs home and stares into the camera?
31: Sweetheart, I've had nothing but As my whole life.
Sweetheart, I've had nothing but As my whole life.
Bragging about your report card might not be the best way to get a date Di.
Scarves, wine: good.
Necklaces, whining, report cards: bad
Got it. You guys are the BEST!
Okay, that last was supposed to be signed, "Vibrant, yet matronly, Di Kotimy." Which admittedly wasn't that funny.
Don't listen to this alleged expert; she thinks that my never-fail pickup line wouldn't work:
"My back's been bothering me ever since my ex pushed me down the stairs during a fight about money."
In the very first line that the man says...are we supposed to be understanding him to be saying "She sure looks like a bitch"?
The "EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE" line reminds me of the book AB's stepmother sent her soon before we met: If I'm So Wonderful, Why Am I Alone? AB always notes that this was sent to her then-new office.
When I saw that book on her shelf, I knew I had an easy score.
38: Yes.
In fairness, none of us needs that.
Except Mr. B, I guess.
I've always wanted to try the line "You're hot! You should be in porn!" but I'm a coward and don't want to be kicked in the groin.
Though it occurs to me that "You're vibrant, yet matronly! You should be in porn!" has a certain something to it.
Had he dressed it up with a nice scarf ascot, he might have gotten somewhere.
Just go with "'Face it, honey. You're choices are pretty much down to me or spending the rest of your life in a houseful of cats."
42: Especially if artfully deployed to cover the stains.
I hadn't considered it, but given 42 I now have to wonder what "it" is.
Just go with "'Face it, honey. You're choices are pretty much down to me or spending the rest of your life in a houseful of cats."
I'm practicing that one in the mirror: "I AM better than a houseful of cats! I really am! Doggone it, I am better than cats."
I dunno, Will, it really isn't that comforting when a man sits on your head and makes a rumbling noise in your ear.
43 - problem is, I like cats. I'm going to end up with a houseful of cats one way or the other. Be nice to have some help with the litterbox, tho. And sex. Especially the sex part.
47: On the other hand, most men don't make me sneeze or make my eyes itch.
I trust the cats to take care of their sex without any help from me.
I dunno, Will, it really isn't that comforting when a man sits on your head and makes a rumbling noise in your ear.
That wasnt your ear at the Flophouse?
"'Face it, honey. You're choices are pretty much down to me or spending the rest of your life in a houseful of cats."
"Well, if you don't like cats, you can just fuck off now and stop wasting my time."
The operative word is "houseful", all you self-righteous catophiles.
54: Heh. I was trying to figure out how to make that joke and gave up; I'm very happy someone did.
what possible "wrong reasons" red wine could be associated with
You don't want to show that you're careless with things of value, and it's probably best not to make him think of that scene from Carrie.
If you hear a rumbling noise when somebody's sitting in your head, you should move quickly.
Uh, sorry about breaking the blog.
We're all thinking about that scene in Carrie.
As long as the blog's broken, I just finished The Road by Cormac McCarthy last night, and what a dark, dark, dark book that was. Very much enjoyed it, though.
Or not.
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Is it just me, or does anyone else feel like giggling when they hear Bernie Madoff's name pronounced? Made off! Hilarious.
"Where's your money these days?" "Oh, my fund manager is Rob Yooblind. I trust him implicitly."
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61.PausePlay: Yes. Juvenile, but funny.
62: about the best anyone can hope for, really.
5: Red wine stains are hard to remove. Only spill clear drinks on men you're trying to entice.
4: What scares me is that I was living in NYC in 1973. But I hung out at an upper West Side bar, across from the Columbia campus, which attracted unshaven intellectuals who probably wanted to get laid, but who wanted to discuss the finer points of the conduit metaphor even more.
I don't think the video has bad advice assuming you are the target audience for the video. Hit on shy guys. Learn about your local sports teams. Cheesy but effective.
"EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE" is just the name of the found video footage website.
Learn about your local sports teams.
No good will come of this.
Only spill clear drinks on men you're trying to entice.
But if it's just a few drops of water, a trip the dry cleaners might not be necessary, and thus no number would be obtained. There's a sweet spot to be found here, you see.
"If you think you can't get interested, find a player you think is attractive and at least learn some things about him."
----
"Hey there, I see you're watching the Yankees. That Alex Rodriguez sure is sexy. I bet his cock is much bigger than yours, he's certainly much better looking and richer, too. Oh, dear, that didn't go too well. Let me spill some red wine on you and we'll call it an evening."
I don't think the video has bad advice assuming you are the target audience for the video. Hit on shy guys. Learn about your local sports teams. Cheesy but effective.
Assuming the target audience is bitchy women bitching that "there are no men out there," I think I officially qualify as the target audience. The advice would never do it for me. Learn about my local sports teams? Would that be so I can charm some twit who can't manage an interesting conversation about anything other than Da Bears? Um, no thanks.
Learn about my local sports teams? Would that be so I can charm some twit who can't manage an interesting conversation about anything other than Da Bears?
No, it's so you have something easy with which to break the ice. That advice came in the segment of the video about women being more aggressive in hitting on shy men. That doesn't mean you have to always and only talk about Da Bears, or waste time with guys who do.
OT: Is this prosecutor crazy? Chicago people, what is your take?
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/chi-dna-14-dec15,0,5809555.story?page=1
Assuming the target audience is bitchy women
BZZZZT. No. The assumption is insecure and perhaps slightly dim women who have never considered the possibility that they could, you know, ask a guy out.
have never considered the possibility that they could, you know, ask a guy out
Whoa there, miss social revolutionary. I didn't see anything about women asking men out. I think the video only mentions taking the lead in talking to guys, and at them longingly. If that doesn't work you're still SOL.
74: s/b "staring" and at them longingly, stupid html. Why can't the internet be easier to use??
75: surely there's something to be said for talking at guys longingly.
Would that be so I can charm some twit who can't manage an interesting conversation about anything other than Da Bears?
If you run into someone like this, you could easily change the topic to the Cubs, the White Sox, the Bulls, the Black Hawks, or possibly even college sports from the University of Illinois!
Glad to help.
Sewing fear is for seamstresses; sowing fear is for Dear Leader
72: We're talking about the video, no? I didn't see any indication that the hapless heroine was insecure or slightly dim.
If you run into someone like this, you could easily change the topic to the Cubs, the White Sox, the Bulls, the Black Hawks, or possibly even college sports from the University of Illinois!
I'm not actually from the area, but I'd bet a dollar that no one in the entire state of Illinois is willing to sleep with someone who would rather discuss the Blackhawks than the Bears, and that includes members of the Blackhawks and their wives.
77: Sow fear is for the conservatives who stumble across Emerson's farm.
78: Her stilted is no doubt just a product of bad acting, but it does make her sound like she is just not all there.
the Blackhawks
My Chicago-based hockey-watching relatives have all abandoned the Blackhawks, preferring instead to root for The Chicago Wolves.
all abandoned the Blackhawks
Don't make me come down and kick yer ass. Cuz I still can.
http://www.sportsgalleryweb.com/images/hockey/photos/bobby_hull_us_bloody_large.jpg
79: You would be wrong, sir. You were too busy hanging out in your Wicker Park bars, scenester. (Plus there was a while there when all the girls proclaimed their love for Chris Chelios.)
60: I just finished The Road by Cormac McCarthy last night
Good times. The dos and donts of getting dates gets *really* delicate.
You know, as a guy aspiring to lay down serious tracks in the near future, this video provides me with no end of samples for "aww yeah, get drrrty"-type songs. Thank you Unfogged.
Just sayin'.
86: Be sure to avoid subjects like holocausts and cannibalism. These are almost always turnoffs.
Cannibalism can be a good way to sound out your prospect's boundaries, though.
You'd be surprised how much a well-maintained shopping cart can add ot your appeal.
c'mon. By nearly any standard, so can chainsaws.
92 demonstrates why the failure to set out clear boundaries on cannibalism can lead to potentially upsetting misunderstandings when talking dirty to a new partner.
Actually, "stack wood" is craigslist code for "freebase space mushrooms"
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Are you guys watching the "Day in 100 Seconds" videos at TPM? If not, you should -- they're amazing.
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70 is true, I suppose, but I seriously can't imagine getting past those opening lines.
"Have you been following [Sports Team]?"
"Yes! They are a bunch of bums!"
"Seriously!"
That conversation about the "good news" could not have gone anywhere either, right? His little eleemosynary tiddle at the end doesn't even leave you room to go on to talk about your life, because you'll just sound like a dick.
This is why I don't do small talk. I really can't see a way out of it. My general rule is to start off way too overly intimate and then later figure out if we have stuff in common to talk about.
"Learn about my local sports teams? Would that be so I can charm some twit who can't manage an interesting conversation about anything other than Da Bears? Um, no thanks."
Some people just need something to get the conversation going; doesn't mean they're dim, necessarily.
I used to clerk for an extremely sharp and worldly federal judge, and with her, I could carry on the most urbane and witty conversation covering any topic under the sun. But if I'm standing next to a pretty-but-unfamiliar woman at a party, I can never think of a damn thing to say. (Furthermore, I'm married, so it's not like I'm trying to pick anybody up.)
The male brain is just weird that way for some of us.
(The exception is if I've had 3+ drinks, in which case I become the most gregarious guy in the world.)
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Not at fifteen below it isn't. Playing the Florida card wasn't a smart move. We are chauvinistic and resent being compared to shitholes.
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Forgive me, it's not like I want to turn this into a food thread, but OT bleg:
I seem to remember that it was someone here who pointed to a site where one could sign up for a plan to have a miscellany of gourmet foods (various categories were available) shipped out monthly. This'd be for a holiday gift; I must have looked at the site at some point, but have no idea what it is/was now.
Any candidates for places that provide services like this?
Harry and David are nice for that sort of thing, especially with regard to fruit. If they're a real coffee lover, the luxurious Peregrine Coffee has a monthly option.
For really high-end handmade chocolates, John & Kira.
Wow, I'm kind of startled I could come up with so many that easily.
I was thinking Zingermans, too, but it's pretty pricey. We did one of their cheese clubs once and it was good.
Thanks -- okay, I'm exploring. Maybe Zingerman's is the one I remember someone mentioning ... but the various monthly clubs listed there tend to be for specific foods (olive oil, bacon), excepting the Culinary Adventure Club, which frankly looks a little too adventurous.
There have to be a number of these places! Hard to figure out what to google for. A rather basic crackers, cheese, smoked salmon, dried fruits, say marinated feta, pesto, groovy gingerbread ... that kind of thing would be about right. But monthly rather than a single gift basket. (It's for my brother, and the dude doesn't eat enough, what with the nuking of the chicken patties and the ham-and-american-cheese sandwiches in between playing rounds of World of Warcraft. Alas, fresh fruit would not go over well.)
This focuses the task for me -- thanks. Someone can sign me up for Zingerman's Bread Club any time. oo yeah.
I was thinking Zingermans, too, but it's pretty pricey. We did one of their cheese clubs once and it was good.
Sure, if you join the club of a food that has to be shipped refrigerated, that add to the cost.
Playing the Florida card wasn't a smart move.
Maybe the canvassing board should go door to door and ask everyone how they voted. It might take less time.
Sure, if you join the club of a food that has to be shipped refrigerated, that add to the cost.
It does, yes. But most things you buy from Zingermans is going to come at some markup over what you would pay somewhere else.
This focuses the task for me -- thanks. Someone can sign me up for Zingerman's Bread Club any time. oo yeah.
Actually, I do NOT find that their bread survives the voyage particularly well, no matter what they claim.
Are going to come at some markup, that is.
There's no hurry, and things are more or less on schedule. The new Senator will be seated in January sometime, and if he's late, the republic can limp along OK with 99 Senators.
Becks totally just got a shout out on the Rachel Maddow show. Spencer Ackermann was on and as Rachel was saying goodbye he managed to squeeze in a 'Happy Birthday, Becks!'
(And happy birthday, Becks!)
112: I did notice what we are politely calling the markup. This whole thing is depressing, man. My mother has just told me that for the last few years, my brother has gotten me really nice things, and I haven't really gotten him anything nice. Thanks, mom (not entirely true, either). Y'know, he is able to get me these things because I tell him what I would like; he does not.
I've decided to impose some kind of mandatory Amazon wish list behavior on my family members: you are all going to start one of these things. I will not be bullied! Now, I dislike inviting Amazon into my figurative house in this way, but really, I know there are things you want, so why don't you let me know what they are, because apparently you don't like Northface stuff any more.
Yes, I'm killing the romance of it all, and that's deeply saddening.
114 makes me super jealous. I'm stealing Becks's birthday.
Right, as long as we're talking about presents again, can somone recommend a non-creepy place to get a massage in Brooklyn? That sells gift certificates that one can buy over the phone or online?
118: Elan on 7th Ave isn't bad. I haven't gotten a massage there, but it's a nice spa. There are several others in Park Slope, but I haven't been to them.
If you're looking for something fancy in NYC in general, Bliss is where I used to work, and they have a really lovely environment, but you have to get an appointment well in advance.
Bliss is very nice. As is Soho Sanctuary -- very nice, less well known, a little more woowoo.
120, 121: Thanks. I should clarify that this is for a guy, and it doesn't need to be fancy. The "non-creepy" was just meant to signify "definitely not a massage parlor."
I just ordered chocolates from the John and Kira place in 105. Thanks for the suggestion. I hope they are good.
Is unfogged operating in the future? How is it possible that the last comment was posted at 8:56? I'm confused.
Happy birthday, Becks!
i wonder what PSA means, i know only the prostate specific antigen, still didn't watch the video
coz lazy and i think i know what it will say
wanted to post the translated proverbs but left the file at work
PSA: public-service announcement. You should watch the video; it's a hilarious reminder of 1980s hairstyles and clothing, never mind the rest of it.
(And belated Happy Birthday, Becks!)
124: Whoever controls the time stamps is messing with your head. It's a test.
Happy Birthday Becks!
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Annals of Stupid White white people:
EASTON, Pa. - A supermarket is defending itself for refusing to a write out 3-year-old Adolf Hitler Campbell's name on his birthday cake. Deborah Campbell, 25, of nearby Hunterdon County, N.J., said she phoned in her order last week to the Greenwich ShopRite. When she told the bakery department she wanted her son's name spelled out, she was told to talk to a supervisor, who denied the request.Now go read the rest for the funny part.
max
['OMFG.']
everything is terrible, ha, funny
lame advices imo, i could advice like better
though, sure, a shoemaker
the little Adolf's father strangely resembles goebbels
127: Damn you, time stamps!!
131: A suitable enough response to advance you to the next level. If you're willing enough and able.
128: My prediction is that the children will be homeschooled, but their birthday cakes will never be homebaked, because the parents will want to pull this stunt every year (or at least until they lose custody).
132: Awesome! I'm totally ready.
133: Maybe the whole thing is an elaborate prank on society. Kind of a social tweak.
Maybe the whole thing is an elaborate prank on society. Kind of a social tweak.
Unfortunately, I think B. got it right:
The article, of course, ends up being sad. Lalala, a couple of young people who feel really estranged, acting out in an attempt to figure out what their issues are and get some attention. The poor kids.
134: You have investigated the links on the blogroll?
But that's easy. You have perused the fewer cock jokes at the Unfogged Reading Group?
I seriously can't imagine getting past those opening lines.
"Have you been following [Sports Team]?"
"Yes! They are a bunch of bums!"
"Seriously!"
Many women get intimidated by sports talk, but most guy sports talk doesnt get much deeper than that exchange.
If you want to drive yourself nuts, take a few minutes and listen to any sports radio call-in show.
"You know, Bob, if our team could have scored more points and held their team to fewer points, we really might have won that game."
Seriously, ladiez, there is nothing to be intimidated about sports talk, unless mind-numbingly trite conversation intimidates you.
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just got back from my bachelor party.
highlight:
bride showed up to karaoke with two friends
all in high burlesque corsetted attire.
also we played rock band after.
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wooo, happy birthday becks!!! that's the coolest birthday shout out ever. after the blago rap too, that boy is definitely kicking ass lately.
140: I'm sure I've related this before, but I tried for a while to teach my sister-in-law the right circumstances under which she could say, "now, that's just good special teams play," since I was convinced this one sentence, combined with some generic content-free fandom, would be enough to make her appear to be deeply knowledgeable about football. I still think it was a good idea. also, woo wrongshore!
Actually, I could use some pointers on sports small talk, too. I simply don't follow sports at all, which has lead to some awkward moments when guys try to do the homosocial chitchat thing, since I also won't swap sexist comments.
I can figure out what's going on in Baseball, and Basketball is simple, but American Football is insanely overspecialized and rulebound - it's like it was designed by a committee of lawyers and insects. All I get out of it is that a bunch of testosterone poisoned ectomorphs in tight pants smack each other on the ass and then jump in a big pile. Also there's a guy called "Tight End" which really ought to be a Bond villain who kills his victims by snapping their cock off with his ass.
Damn you people, it took me forty years to figure out tagging up.
143: That would be an ecumenical matter.
Actually, I could use some pointers on sports small talk, too.
"I stopped keeping up this season since the [insert mediocre team you pretend to support] aren't in contention," is a good all-purpose response.
N.B. this doesn't work as well if you live in the Boston area--bitchez.
For football and basketball, "I really prefer the college game" has broad utility. (If the discussion is about college sports, replace with "the pro game", mutatis mutandis.)
There was an entire episode of the IT Crowd recently in which the main characters tried to appear knowledgeable about football using some basic bluffing phrases ...
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=NKHyqjHqQLU
N.B. this doesn't work as well if you live in the Boston area--bitchez.
Or Glasgow.
144: Everything you need to know, togolosh.
If you flip through the sports pages regularly, you don't need to read with attention, but watch for names and the kinds of things that get said about them: Jeter is overrated, Manning isn't as good as his brother, whatever. Then pick an opinion and toss it in at random; that's usually enough to make you look knowledgable. It doesn't have to be right, or defensible, just an opinion on an identifiable current sports topic. Generally people won't press you on it -- they may disagree, but if they do they'll usually run with it, and you can grunt responsively rather than having to say anything much.
I used to do this to avoid being shut out of sports conversations at my last firm; it worked pretty well.
N.B. this doesn't work as well if you live in the Boston area--bitchez.
On the other hand, if you live anywhere else in the country then "I hate the Patriots/Celtics/Red Sox and their fucking arrogant fucking fans, wasn't it nice when Brady broke his leg, I hope the surgery gets infected" will work OK as a sports conversation starter.
152: so the rest of the country is filled with assholes with weird issues? You'd think you'd have more friends, then.
You're not being funny, Sifu! Boston sports must get you deep down inside.
If you flip through the sports pages regularly
This is very true. I can sound knowledgeable about NASCAR, golf, and baseball, despite finding all three completely unwatchable.
"I stopped keeping up this season since the [insert mediocre team you pretend to support] aren't in contention," is a good all-purpose response.
N.B. this doesn't work as well if you live in the Boston area--bitchez.
Sure it does, you just need to reword a bit:
"I stopped keeping up with the Celtics this season since the rest of the league isn't in contention."
Also, really football, togolosh? That strikes me as about the easiest sport to understand. (There are plenty of rules, sure, but you don't need to understand any of them to watch the game.) Teams try to get the ball to the other side of the field. Their opponents try to stop them. The end.
Besides Boxing, true. Boxing is definitely even easier to understand. And also MMA, if you consider that a sport. (Which of course you should.)
But among team sports, football is as easy as it gets, I think?
I dunno, football complicates things somewhat, what with the downs, and the three sets of teams, and the kicking and the so on. Basketball, that's pretty easy to grasp.
Also, really football, togolosh? That strikes me as about the easiest sport to understand. (There are plenty of rules, sure, but you don't need to understand any of them to watch the game.)
Sure, if the goal is to watch and enjoy the game, that's fine. But for football talk you need to be able to competently blather on about whether that holding or pass interference or clipping or whatever dumbass call is really justifiable.
Basketball is pretty easy, too, I guess. But I'd think someone might be confused by why they were always boucing the ball on the floor, and then you'd have to explain the rules about travelling, and then they'd be saying "wait, wasnt' that a travel?" every 2 minutes for the rest of the game, and you'd have to say "yes, technically", oh and you'd also have this same problem with personal fouls, etc. And there's the three-second rule. And the three-point line.
122: Aha! Soho Sanctuary is women only. So that won't do at all.
hen they'd be saying "wait, wasnt' that a travel?" every 2 minutes for the rest of the game, and you'd have to say "yes, technically"
To be fair, this still confuses me. How do they decide on the one day a year you can call travel?
Also, if you're feeling shut out of sports conversations, I've always found this line works wonders:
"I dunno, sports are kind of like porn for me: I'd much rather play than sit around watching or talking about it."
Sure, if the goal is to watch and enjoy the game, that's fine. But for football talk you need to be able to competently blather on about whether that holding or pass interference or clipping or whatever dumbass call is really justifiable.
Here are a few evergreen opinions you can offer on the matter:
"The refs never call offensive holding, even when it's really blatant."
"I don't think the receiver had control of the ball when he was down. That pass should have been called incomplete."
"The rules are way too lenient toward quarterbacks nowadays. The diligent enforcement of the roughing the passer rule I can live with, but the fact that the refs never call intentional grounding anymore is like a get-out-of-jail free card for quarterbacks under pressure."
Di has no appreciation for professionalism and mastery of a craft, I see. I guess you'd also rather paint that go to the art museum? And bang away on a piano rather than attend the symphony?
(And there's no rule against doing both, you know.)
163: I've wondered that as well -- how refs draw the line between the kind of travelling it would be hopelessly gauche to call attention to, and the kind of travelling (like, tucking the ball under your arm and running down the court) that they'd have to call.
167: depends on the player doing it, no lie.
There are plenty of rules, sure, but you don't need to understand any of them to watch the game.
Well, not to just sit there and watch the people running around. You can say the same thing about any sport, but to get anything out of it you really need to know the most of the rules. Otherwise you end up with constant deus ex machina type things interrupting the narrative.
168: Sure, but there's got to be a line no one's allowed to cross, or it'd be rugby with hoops. Given that the line isn't where the rules say it is for the real stars, figuring out where it is actually drawn has got to be a headache for the refs.
Come to think of it, that's got to be neat from the players' point of view: you start out as a no-name rookie who has to follow the rules, and then one day you realize "I've really made it -- I can foul with impunity now!" Like finally learning the secret handshake.
167: It's completely unintelligible. One rule is that the big stars get more slack. The second rule is that you don't really call the written rules, though you have to know what they are. The third rule is to not let things get too far out of hand, whatever that means.
166: No, I have no artistic ability and I am tone deaf.
bang away on a piano rather than attend the symphony?
160: Sure, if the goal is to watch and enjoy the game, that's fine.
This makes me think that I watch sports in a completely different way than most people. Is it really enough to just have action take place and know that one side or another is winning or losing without knowing why and how this latest development affects what might happen next?
173: well are you a professional-caliber athlete and lover? If not, watching great professionals at work can still be entertaining.
There might be a rule that players who look exciting and graceful when they're travelling or fouling get slack even if they're not stars. B-ball is entertainment.
176: Okay, I admit it. I'm not the athlete I once was.
176: And help you improve your moves.
Anyway, Brock, I'm really just messing with you. But you see how you got diverted from talking about sports to talking about whether or not there is value in talking about sports.
I can't believe you were just messing with me, Di. I was being dead serious.
And help you improve your moves.
I assert that the average man is more likely to degrade than improve his lovemaking technique by imitating pornography. I leave open the possibility that it might be helpful for some women, but largely because men's expectations are in part a product of pornographic displays.
Er, 183 to 181. At least originally.
"The refs never call offensive holding, even when it's really blatant."
Defensive holding, maybe?
I'm bad to ask about this because I find football easy to understand, but stuff that comes up in conversation now tends to be about who you think will win the playoffs, or who will get the last playoff spot, and that takes two minutes at ESPN.com to figure out. It's not technical knowledge of the game or the individual players, but it's timely.
The parallels between sex and sports are indeed compelling, but the analogy starts to break down when it comes to the question of society's attitudes toward being a youth league coach.
187: "Hey there Bobby. Let me show you a different grip that I think you will find more effective."
Even aside from the dictionary-sized rulebook, I'd say football really is one of the most difficult sports to really understand because, much more so than the other major sports, it's a coaches' game more than a players' game. Even people who watch a lot of football often have no idea what's going on at the line, aside from guys crashing into each other.
Even people who watch a lot of football often have no idea what's going on at the line
You think this is more difficult to understand than, say, teams working to set screens in basketball?
192: yes. There are more people involved and they are barely even moving, just trying to pull and push.
I'd really say that football is really one of the most difficult sports to really understand....
Fixed
Hockey seems really difficult to get the hang of watching to me, largely because of the speed of the puck -- you can't watch the puck, you have to watch everyone, everywhere on the ice, because the puck could be anywhere two seconds from now. I've never understood a hockey game at all.
RICK WARREN?! Fuck that fucking fucker. Fuck you, too, Obama.
